God's Design - Bryan and Juliana Murray

Take a breather from the craziness of the social distancing, and instead lean in close with Bryan and Juliana Murray, as we discuss what divorce and a blended family looks like, in light of God's design for marriage and family. We are so thankful for these two, their beautiful family and God's redemption through everything. 

Transcript

spk_2:   0:00
thank you for listening to

spk_1:   0:02
the distinct podcast recorded live from Fresno, California Mrs. ST Podcasts well recorded live while practicing outstanding social distancing while recording its introduction on my cell phone 20 miles from the actual location of the distinct podcasts. Oh, these are great days. So let me introduce you to our guest today. Brian and Julian Murray. Brian is hungry for Christ and has a flair for the funny and humorous. You should hear some of that today, and Julianna is a new step Mom, the matriarch of a blended family and who has previously served as a missionary for 10 years overseas in India today, you will hear the story of a beautiful, blended family. Let's listen in about how God's will and God's design can bring about incredible blessings when Christ is the center of your marriage and your life. Let's welcome the move.

spk_2:   1:15
Wait, thrill. Just so he's already way might have to just keep that suspenseful moment. Brian. Interest ready? Wow, that was good. Well, welcome. Murray's into the distinct podcast. We're so happy to finally have you guys here. Thank you, Brian, for the intro. Thanks for having us. Yeah, this feels a little out of our element, but, uh, a little Yeah, well, we're glad to have you guys here. We have Brian Murray and Julianna Murray. Um, Brian is the director of I t at chancy Golden Casino night. I know. I'm saying too chancy. Wrong. How do you say? Well, I say chancy by our elders Say took chancy. And then Julianna it Yes, Giuliana is a business processor at a personal finance company. Ameriprise. Yeah. So

spk_3:   2:30
our d n a decision.

spk_2:   2:31
All right, That's what they do. But we kind of wanted to jump in a little bit in. I know who you actually are.

spk_3:   2:39
Who are you?

spk_0:   2:41
Uh, it's a, uh, ragamuffin dragon. Yeah. Have you seen that documentary? Huh? Uh, no. I'm gonna get the guy's name wrong, but basically, he's ah, a big singer in the eighties and Dutch Mullins Rich Mullins. Thank you, dear. See better half right here and sing the song. You know, our God is an awesome god. Anyways, uh,

spk_2:   3:09
you called himself a ragamuffin.

spk_0:   3:10
Basically a beggar at the you know, feet of God asking for mercy. And, uh, that's how I see my identity is just someone who's, uh I'm deserving because I've screwed up a lot. I'm sure

spk_2:   3:25
you hear about that s O anyways. Just rightful. Really? Yeah. That's cool. In Julianna. Yeah.

spk_3:   3:34
Gosh, I'd say I'm daughter of Christ, follower of God I Andi. I'm in transition to a new stage of my life and had so much of my life just me and him and being focused on missions and sharing the love of God to people who had never heard with my passion and, uh, a handful of years ago met, uh, this guy and and now life looks just totally different. I guess I was new. It probably get married one day. But now I'm I'm a wife. I'm I'm a mom. Step mom. And and I'm extracting and thanks learning, learning what it looks like to be a Christ follower and a new, exciting context.

spk_2:   4:35
Give us some a little bit insights or you admissions.

spk_3:   4:39
Yeah, I did international mission work. I, uh well, when I was when I became a believer in 15 I started going on trips because I just blew my mind that there's entire people groups that had never, ever heard about Jesus before. Like, I hadn't heard about his love and his personal love for me and that he was my savior and it changed my life so dramatically. I thought they have to know they have to hear. So I think I was 16 or 17. I went to El Salvador, and then I went to, um, whales and then China. And then I moved to India for two years. And that was just that was my dream at that point was did not have to leave. You go for 10 days and it's rough on your heart to meet people. Tell him about Christ. They feel like their life has changed. They want to be decided, and you have to leave. So after living in India for two years, I started working in Richmond, Virginia, for the International Mission Board, the company that was sending the missionaries outsides there for the next seven years. And

spk_2:   5:49
isn't that got you that you're dating this girl is Chrissie know,

spk_3:   5:57
sent students on mission until I came home and it will be part of my story. Came home to be with my grandpa, who was passing away, and but I I was on my way to my next mission. I was gonna go move overseas, and, um, my next mission,

spk_2:   6:16
Mr Murray Way. We're, uh we're driving back from Monterey yesterday, and we had a pretty good discussion. It was a good discussion, not an argument. It was, uh, on. Why do you share the gospel? And so Oh, no. We said, what? What is your purpose? Right? What was the question? Um, Dusty, Why do we Why do we share the gospel? Yeah, I think that's what because I asked. It was It was Why do you share the gospel? My answer was I feel like I am a number one called to do that. So the great commission, there's a calling on my life too. Share his word. And then also, I do feel like something like this podcast would be a fruit, um, of my regenerate heart. And in that I feel like I'm pleasing God. So I also go out and share what he's done for me. And I share the gospel because I feel like I'm told. Great. Like I'm pleasing Dad. I'm making dad happy. Not like I can earn through my work's salvation. Because I know I can't do that. I know that I'm saved by his grace and mercy alone. There's nothing that I could ever do to please him for earn my salvation. However, I do feel like store up treasures for myself, and I feel like God is happy in my obedience, especially from doing out of the joy in my heart. So that was my answers. I find I'm making dad smile Was was my answer and Dre, I was more like I I want to be able to share, um, what God has done in my life. And I want others to hear that in hopes that they I don't know. I would just hope that they would want to find that same joy and hope that he's done for me. And then they would want that, too, for sure. It seemed like when I heard her say that she shares out of ah like a heart of compassion. She wants to help others not like me. And we kind of went deeper into her like, Well, are you Ah, am I being selfish by trying to store treasures that for myself, or why you really sharing? But we kind of went along. Now those lines S O. I

spk_3:   8:45
praise the glory of God.

spk_2:   8:47
And that's where that's where purpose came. When in was I said, I think that what? Why are we here? What's the purpose? Our purpose is to glorify God. But why do you go out? Why did you go out on mission?

spk_3:   9:01
Yeah, I was just thinking, as you're talking, that is so important to know whether you're on an international mission trip or there you're at home trying to figure what God has for you to do. Here is Why do you do it? I am. I went on missions because of unreached people groups. Specifically. I'm because there are entire people, groups, languages, tribes that don't have the gospel. They don't have a Bible in their language, and they will. They have zero chance of hearing Who? Christ iss. And I think for me it was not being able to fathom entire groups of people spending eternity in hell and also hell on Earth without him. When he offers life here and now

spk_2:   9:56
Why? I'm assuming you've told. At least I'm trying to think about it. I don't not aware this question because you don't do missions like I've never never win

spk_0:   10:08
on a, uh, church sanctify admission

spk_2:   10:13
he will. Oh, really? It's not been that their bucket list. Yeah,

spk_0:   10:20
it's something I want to dio. And, uh, I was looking at Scott Caroline when he just went to

spk_2:   10:27
hell in

spk_0:   10:28
Thailand, and that sounded really

spk_2:   10:30
cool. So what made you come to Christ, then? Because he how new are you

spk_0:   10:35
in faith? Um, 2014 in the fall is when and I found myself walking through the doors of the well, and, um, I was divorced, Um, had been, um, divorced for a while. At least separated for a while and have couple years, and I was just miserable. I was trying to figure out how to, um, fill this void. And so I decided that if I just do something every day, then you know, because you come home to an empty house, no wife, no kids, and ah, it's, you know, either binge tv or what do you do you not have purpose. And, uh, so I need to feel something.

spk_2:   11:29
Fill that hole

spk_0:   11:30
with something. So I think you

spk_3:   11:32
literally get rid of your TV. At one point

spk_2:   11:34
I did, I did. Oh, I cut the TV service off. And were you a video game

spk_0:   11:40
player? Now think that that's a bad thing that I'm one of those people are. Like, if I do, you get into a video game, you'll lose you guys for a while until I've beaten the game. Actually, I did everything each day of the week. I had something specifically planned. So after work, I would go do it so that I could try Thio, you know, just move on in life. I didn't know how really to do that. And, uh, had somebody at work Who, um who is, uh, I hired him. Uh, he was outspoken Christian, And, uh, I remember in the interview it was like, um, usually, you know, at a typical organizations have word for you. Don't mention religion or politics kind of thing. And he was right in the interview saying,

spk_2:   12:31
Yeah, I'm on fire for Christ on this e

spk_0:   12:34
wanted position at that. I mean, he's gonna he's gonna stir the waters in here a little bit. But I thought, you know what? Let's just do it. And so sure enough, you start the waters in me and he just kind of put out those bread crumbs. And I was stubborn and, um and ah, finally I went and Googled from my office churches in northern part of Fresno because I was living in Coarsegold. So of course, it has to be the most important thing for churches to make sure it's close

spk_2:   13:05
to you, Thio. Likely there's no Buddhist Church, but,

spk_0:   13:13
uh, finally found the well and then I told him, was I came. Uh um, I, uh, found a church. I'm gonna go to Sunday, too. And he's a guy. And what's name I'm like, Oh, it's this place. It's called the Well, and he's like, Oh, perfect. I know some people over there. I'll introduce you Sunday. I'll see you down there and I was probably the church he would have told me todo but, you know, I

spk_2:   13:33
was gonna do it my way. You know, Christ decided he was gonna be his way.

spk_0:   13:39
So, um, so that's when I got plugged and I walked through the doors and got introduced a couple people. Um and then, um it was, like, immediate. I mean, guy went to work crazy quick. Uh, I remember leaving and then could not wait until the next service. I mean, it was like, Why isn't this every day, you know, because I literally had that whole week where it was like, I'm just trying to fill myself with other crap. And, um, this was something, really, you know? And so, yeah, that's how I came to Christ, uh, growing up as a kid. You know, my my dad was a Christian. Um, gosh, I guess I got my parents divorced it when I was two. And, um, my dad moved down to San Diego, Um, a few years later and s o a team on summer breaks in Christmas breaks. Um, and so I had a little bit ahead knowledge because we go to Sunday school when I was visiting him. But my mom, however, was 80 s for a long time, and so I really kind of just felt like I had to acknowledge to a degree and a very basic, very basic level degree, like Noah's ark stuff, you know, And, um, I didn't have a relationship with himself. Somebody you asked me a question. How is it? Yes, but definitely would. No relationship. It would be like I would lose something in my room, and I would pray to God. Okay. God. You know,

spk_2:   15:13
if you don't find my yeah, my Nintendo controller, then I'm not gonna believe in you, you know? And then, of course, I wouldn't find my Nintendo controller, but then All right. God, I'm gonna get another chance here, so Yeah. Really? It's, uh, another. Meanwhile, you know,

spk_0:   15:39
he's he's pulling her streaks, so Yeah.

spk_2:   15:45
So, um, passionate. Nowhere was going with this, Um,

spk_3:   15:49
what kind of where you were out with your relationship with Christ. Um, you start going to the Well.

spk_2:   15:55
Yeah, I guess so. You were Horace and Oh, yeah, I was, Uh gosh, there's so much so girling. I guess I get over my wife. I guess I go over growing up

spk_0:   16:07
a little bit. Um, so, um ah, I struggled with relationships. Um, early on in my mom and I wouldn't have really solid foundation. Um, it just felt as I felt a little bit neglect. Um, relationships is a whole my my mom watching what a relationship looks like from her, um, you know, not being married and getting into a relationship and how they conflict it. And then when things don't work out. What do you do? You You moved back to you know, we went into my grandparent's house. And so, like, that cycle just over and over and over, Um didn't give me really great few of relationships. Um, my dad, he, uh, and read married. Ah, in 1989. And so, um ah, his relationship with my step mom Kim was stable. And so, um, that's what I looked Thio When I looked at her when a marriage look like that, I had Cem hurt. Um, I kind of felt, uh, about like, uh, not, um I felt like he moved on a little bit, Um, even though we saw him and summer and Christmas. But, you know, when you get a Christmas card, you're not in it, you know, And I get mean, logistics are tough toe pretty good distance and stuff. So, anyways, um, there's just some some toughness there, and ah, Anyways, I I look at the whole thing, and I now have the thought of what's God teaching me and this whole thing.

spk_3:   18:14
And I just love that God brought us together because we get each other. You know, you don't have to feel like one of us went through. This quote unquote perfect child hitter has the perfect family. We have beautiful families that are blended and have been broken and have been redeemed.

spk_2:   18:38
So what? Give us, like, a a shot of your John had What was that, like growing up?

spk_3:   18:46
My my dad was in the Marines, so I don't I don't have a lot of memories off him and my mom together. I don't have any memories of them together. Before they got divorced from my first memory of my dad was him at the front door leaping goodbye. And the years were a bit rough, with some abuse going on different kinds of abuse from my dad and step dad and, um, and in this time, growing up, I there was just a period of time where I wasn't allowed to be to go to my dad's anymore for a year or two. But my sister and my brother did. And so it's just a lot of it's a blur, a blur of, uh,

spk_2:   19:36
but you don't know why you weren't. Yeah. How are

spk_3:   19:39
Yeah, Um, just Cem Cem. Inappropriate behavior that I ended up sharing with my mom stuff went on with my dad at some struggles. And, um so I shared with my mom those things, and ah, I forgot. Basically, like, you know, it happened. It was rough, and I didn't understand really what was happening. And at the same time, there was a little girl on the bus that was starting to do some stuff to me on the bus. And I think I just was in turmoil one day. And I remember my mom was on ah, one of those workout bikes in the living room, and I just like Mom, I'm gonna talk to you. And so I told her some things, um, my dad did. That made me uncomfortable. And the things that girl was doing on the best. And, um, I think I was about eight years old at the time, and she ripped into the poor bus driver. And so that changed. And then also, I'm where my dad would pick up my brother and my sister and all of us for the weekend. I wasn't allowed to go anymore. And so I felt left behind by my dad, I felt I kind of just like I was not pleasing to my mom. My step dad, you know, was nice and then not nice. And then they had a little girl, My, um, half sister who was little sunshine in our lives as 12 wouldn't have had her. And that was it was both wonderful because of how much she had, how much joy she has always brought to my life, but hard because she was treasured. I think my mom is ready to be a mom when she had her and her dad loved her, loved her. And so it was wonderful to see for someone you care about so much and hard to see when you wish you had been loved like that, you know, seeing the photoshoots that she would be a part of And just, you know, when someone's treasures and loved and doted on, you know, so that it's kind of like Brian shared. It's hard, but I know God's used all of us all of our stories now to prepare us for what he had had for us. Okay, so we're gonna fast forward

spk_2:   22:28
to twenties. That's my time. Where? Back for the flute room again? Say, like, brain, you got married

spk_0:   22:45
2000 and seven. Yeah, Um, girl I did actually already moved in with and was living with for a couple of years, and then ah, um, got married. Um, you know, said vows in front of a minister, and my eyes will read the back of a cereal box because there was

spk_2:   23:08
no relationship

spk_0:   23:09
there, you know? Then you know what you did is the promise, you know, And, uh, um, I I had ah, um she had cheated on me, um, prior to us getting married. And, um, I had just said, You know what? We're gonna sweep that under the rug. Just don't do it again kind of thing, and we'll be all fine and s So that's what we did. And then, um, after we made had, um, wonderful daughter Ava, my oldest, Um, who's now 10 and, um, a few years in. There's infidelity again from her. It was tough. And, um, just to clarify here I was no perfect angel. I mean, why didn't have infidelity issues? I just had husband issues where I wasn't a good leader in the house. Um, so anyways, uh, had her second daughter, Lainey, and wasn't long after Lainey was born that I found out that there was another guy and that she was, um, decided that she wanted to separate. Um, and I thought the the fix was like, Well, let's go on a cruise together. And, um and, uh, it was actually on the cruise, that she if you could just feel things were slipping. And, uh, it's on the cruise. She's like, you know what they want to separate. That's like it's gonna be a rough next five days on this bus. And as I was like, we're gonna make this work will get marriage counseling. And, um, it's ah. And that's what it got back. Took about a good month or so for me to find if I counselor and then, um, during marriage counseling, find out that there was some other guy and her new job that she's talking to you and it and she she was done. She didn't want to. And of course, I at that point was like Look like obviously you don't want me and um um, I was done and, uh, it it was ah, looking back now in perspective, after being at the well and learning, you know, some theology. What Christ has. You know what says But what he says about divorce? Um, I should have stuck it out. And, um but I didn't have the tools. I wasn't equipped. I I was just living the way I chose to at the time. And so, um, anyways, um, we're worst. And, uh, that's when ah, things change. You know, you don't come home and, yeah, the kids don't greet you at the door. Just lt. You know, and, uh, I knew that that was gonna change. Um, and, you know, you almost think you're sticking out for the kids, and, um and, ah, you know, that's hard, that you don't want to talk about God's design in this whole thing. And it's hard. Um, and the thing that I get out of it is that it's God's design for marriages is not to divorce. And wow, I know that that relationship wasn't right. It didn't. It wasn't I

spk_2:   27:15
didn't go into

spk_0:   27:16
it in God's design and so obviously exited out of it, um, out of,

spk_2:   27:25
um, you went in into marriage, not knowing God's design. And so you left not knowing God's design either. Yeah, I was just

spk_0:   27:33
exactly. So, um, yeah, that was it that I was now divorced. And you know what I said earlier? I was just trying to fill the void and figure out how to do that. Um, there's a lot that I messed up and I permanently messed up. When you think about my relationship with Julia now in our marriage, you know, the last thing that she wants to do is go hang out with my ex wife on Saturday morning soccer practice with my kids. You know, um, it's not like you divorce the person and they're gone. It's just doesn't There's just so much ramifications for my choices. Um and, um, those are things I have to live with, and, um, I know

spk_3:   28:24
they see why that's not God's to something.

spk_2:   28:27
Well, I don't think I've understood it fully. I mean, you hear it a 1,000,000 times,

spk_0:   28:32
you know, but to actually hear it from, like what? You're from your point of view, you know, with your insight, it's more impactful. Yeah, there's just a lot more challenged to it that people give reality to. You know, somebody told me you wanted to say Well, I was divorced, so expensive because it's worth it. You know what I like? I laugh, you know, But things like now it's it's ah, game Divorces not make things go away. It is not in things, you know, For me, at least that would having kids. And, um, I also have to answer to somebody, which is Christ, you know, I mean, it's covered by his grace, but it doesn't mean it didn't happen.

spk_2:   29:20
Thinking about when people are married and then they get a divorce. But then it's like, was it it was God's plan. But was it that you guys get married now and like, there's this, like, amazing relationship out of it because I now like there's some people were that's like, Oh, yeah, well, I'm I'm divorced. But now I'm, um, like this person. I've been praying for another spouse, and this person just came up to my doorstep, and now we're married, and it was like God was telling me, It's okay. Like I can get married now.

spk_3:   29:56
Um, I don't think that our story is very common. I I can distinctly remember distinct, huh. Um uh, when God impressed upon my heart that I was going to be marrying someone who had already been married. I you know, I became a believer, and I was 15. Completely changed my life. We talked about getting involved in missions, but right before I moved to India and go through a very long, um, training process of eight weeks long in another state. And And they talked to you about not dating for two years. And at that point, I was 21 22 21 towards you. And I remember God putting on my heart. You're going to go on mission for me. I have a plan for you, and your husband is going to be with somebody else. And for a time. So it was clear to me I wasn't going to get married right away. God had something else planned for me. And so for the next 10 years of looking for this man, I was also praying for his wife. Um, because I I knew he was with somebody else crazy. And while I would not that I didn't date for 10 years, I did. And it was very also clear in my heart what it was. I was looking for the kind of guy that God had set aside for me. And I knew when I met him, I would I would know it. And so just a fast forward a little joined a life group and to meet other believers. I hadn't lived here 10 years. Hadn't lived in Fresno very long time. So I didn't have a limp. Um, people call her friendships. My life was very slow watching old Western movies with my grandpa spending time with family. But I joined a life group to meet some people. And that's where I met um, Brian. And I guess I would hear his story. If you're gonna

spk_2:   32:22
tell a story about the she's laughing because,

spk_0:   32:27
man, I'm such a center because because, uh has dating this gal, and, um, we didn't get to spend much time with each other. In fact, it was like, honestly, once a week, maybe twice a week. And so I thought that and you know, I liked her, and I thought that she had good values and whatnot. And so the first ah, night for Life group for Julianna was me announcing my engagement to somebody else.

spk_2:   33:01
How wild is that? It's Yes. That's how I met him

spk_3:   33:05
the night here told the life group he's getting, He's engaged. That's nice. I remember thinking he's gonna regret that

spk_2:   33:15
next week. I did So, uh, so,

spk_0:   33:22
uh, uh, basically, um, she, uh unfortunately, this is not funny, but, uh, she was addicted. Thio two Norco and something builds the stuff in. So she had, um, shipped from Mexico. Some of these drugs to my house. It came to my house and 100 name on it, and I just opened it up. I was gonna, uh she said she was waiting for some medical forms that come through, and so yeah, right. So

spk_2:   33:58
I was gonna I was gonna

spk_0:   34:00
take a picture and send it to her. You know, um and then it was like a wave of, like, things that came about toe light that she wasn't honest about me and her whole family basically sat me down, was telling me, um, all kinds of wild stories of just a string of lice. I mean, she faked her own death and put her obituary in the paper. I mean, I'm talking like

spk_2:   34:28
it was so left

spk_0:   34:29
field, and, um, anyway, I lost touch. Um, I decided at that point that

spk_2:   34:38
I'm not dating anymore. Maybe have Thio. Divine intervention was so left. Really? Yeah.

spk_0:   34:46
It was so left field that I just, uh I was like, wow, like I

spk_2:   34:49
don't need a relationship, you know? I mean, and that's kind

spk_0:   34:52
of goes back to my story, which is like, um, relationships like,

spk_2:   34:56
I do not know how

spk_0:   34:58
to handle relationships. Well, that's just the fax, Like my parents. You know, my mom constantly going through relationships, me going through relationships, you know, my my divorce and how I handled that relationship. And it was just like, I need to be equipped. You know, I'm not good at this.

spk_3:   35:17
It was awesome having in building a friendship, not as two people who are dating and trying to be the best version of ourselves. But being very riel, it we were in life group together, and so everyone knew everything. We were going through what our struggles were on. Our hopes are in, um, getting to see him walk through that too. And and I love to see his heart and his trust in God. I just remember every every Thursday night he would share about how good Goddess

spk_2:   35:52
So God put on your heart that you're going to Mary Guy who was who it had been married and then So there's Brian's got one check there and then you got the no check boxes, man. And then when you when you saw him and he announced his engagement, you're like us to thistle potential. I said, I'm not dating. That's three now. Was that the green? You like this? I think this is the one. He's, uh, all the green lights. Wait. Actually, I think it was our relationship

spk_0:   36:26
was not on the premise of dating each other by any means. Like we had done a survey project together

spk_2:   36:33
way were the only two people basically signed up for this.

spk_3:   36:37
Yeah, they're gonna help some refugees down Talyn. Yeah, we're the only two that showed up, and I was so uncomfortable with it being like a date that we ended in real quick

spk_2:   36:49
and then I'd say it's coincidence, but it's got doesn't doesn't roll like that. I can think of Ah, Kristen Shannon when they were talking about, I think Shannon was talking about you run the race for Jesus, and then eventually you just look left look right if there's no one there where there's that one person lock arms. That's the physical manifestation way. Yeah.

spk_3:   37:15
Yeah. So while we while I had peace in my heart going into this relationship with someone who had been married before because God had put that on my heart and it wasn't this definite, you're gonna get married to someone here. Inspector Morse is just, you know, God, whisper something to your heart. Like this is probably my story. I, um What God did not make clear to me was that I was gonna be a step mom. There were gonna be kids involved, so I was totally unprepared. Yeah, like bright. And I even know our family's heir blended and a mess. Sometimes they're beautiful, you know, And and you don't You don't hear a lot of that in the church, and you don't hear a lot of that at school. They talk about it like it's this broken ugly thing. But it is God's story for our family, and we want them to feel like a part of something special. I have half sister, stepbrother and sister adopted brother and sister. And I love all of them. and it's so beautiful having a family picture of us altogether and supporting each other and caring for each other. The girls are gonna have that too. And we're grateful for our stories because we couldn't make a difference in these girls life. And they're gonna have They're about to have 1/2 sister,

spk_2:   38:44
Uh, you know, you know, could be daunting. You know,

spk_0:   38:48
thinking about all the mistakes in the and the you carry that weight with you. I think it's, um Matthew 11. 28. He brought

spk_2:   38:59
the Bible. You

spk_0:   39:00
come to me all you are weary and burdened and I will give you rest Take my yoke upon you and learn for me For I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls from my yoke is easy And my burden is light And, um yeah, I say that I feel like if I'm getting another tattoo, that's gonna be oh, it's so powerful, Like I've screwed up And I've, you know, I got married without Christ even in that marriage. And, um and I have made a lot of poor choices. And yet God never gave up on me and all that way. I carried it for so long. And when I could finally take that off and give it to Christ and know that he's he's not giving up on me. He's He always, you know, chooses the people who are people. Thank you. He always chooses the unlikely to do great things and to do big things. And so, um, I am highly unlikely. And I know that he has chosen me, Thio Thio, to follow him, to lead others to follow him, to be an example. And, um so that's that's the goal is just to take that weight off, give it to him and just fallen. Be ragamuffin ragamuffin.

spk_3:   40:30
We'll never hear that Bible verse from Psalms. Um, let's see it. The Lord is my chose chosen portion and my cup You hold my lot. The lines have fallen for me. Unpleasant places, indeed. I have a beautiful inheritance. I just I see that as my story. Um and I'm grateful for what God has brought me through and where he has us now. Where where

spk_2:   40:59
would we

spk_0:   40:59
be if we didn't have Christ honestly lost like I'm thinking about my dis mean and I would still be trying to feel like these voids of just unhappiness. Yeah, like, uh, buying, you know,

spk_2:   41:18
boat, RV away these different things that you just try to, you know, like, Oh, this is the next thing

spk_0:   41:24
that the family needs is gonna make its happy and make it just you have this fantasy in your head of being out on

spk_2:   41:29
the lake or whatever it is like that that's the moment.

spk_0:   41:33
That's what's gonna bring the family together and nothing does it like Christ. Yeah.

spk_2:   41:39
You have any told we have to get a close, huh? Yeah. Okay. Um, just, um Well, thank you for coming over and

spk_1:   41:49
thanks. I had with us way appreciate guys listening, kissing on Mike. Thank you guys. You guys. Yeah, I do appreciate everybody listening. For additional information about distinct ministries, go two distinct ministries dot org's. You can also follow the distinct podcast on Facebook and instagram and email your questions and comments toe Andrea at distinct ministries dot or

spk_2:   42:30
wait