72 : ANTS Thoughts

“Ants may be tiny but they can definitely ruin your picnic.That’s how our negative thoughts can ruin our day”.

• Dr. Daniel Amen

In this episode, we are going to talk about different types of ANTs ( Automatic Negative Thoughts) , and how we can relate these in grieving.

Episode Pointers:

• Thoughts are real, and they have a direct impact on how you feel and how you behave. 
• “You don’t have to believe every thought that goes through your head. It’s important to think about your thoughts, to see if they help you , or hurt you.
• There are horrible and painful parts of grief, and there are parts where the sun shines, and you can see the beauty because you’ve seen so much darkness.

Types of ANTs:

•  All or nothing thinking: All good or All bad - We always think that someone or a situation is all good or all bad and nothing in between. Remember life is 50/50. 
• Always thinking:  That something that happened will always repeat itself. 
• Focusing on the negative:  If you are looking through the lens of guilt and what you have done wrong, you are focusing on all the reasons why you should be at fault and the reason your child is no longer here. 
• Thinking with your feelings: This is when you believe your feelings without ever questioning them. However,feeling  a certain way doesn’t mean it’s always true
• Guilt Beatings: Guilt is typically not a helpful emotion. Letting go of all the things you should do in your life. The guilt and the stress of saying you should be doing something only makes it harder to do. 
• Labeling: When you attach a label to yourself or someone else, it doesn’t allow you to take a clear look at the picture.
•  Blaming: This is all about not taking personal responsibility for your life, and you blame others for the problems in your life. This is really toxic, because it takes away any control you have for yourself and gives it to everyone else around you

Resource Book :

Change Your Brain, Change Your Life by Dr. Daniel Amen

If you want to apply for a spot for 1:1 Grief Coaching, go to www.meganhillukka.com/griefcoaching
Join my free class on How to Get Through Grief on November 10th. This is for you if you are feeling stuck, lost, and unsure how to move forward. You can go to this link to register: https://hello71e5ca.clickfunnels.com/webinar-registrationsnm6y6nq

If you are a grieving mother and looking for others who know the pain of child loss, come join my free Grieving Moms Community Facebook group: www.meganhillukka.com/community