“If you have other children, how are your anxiety or stress levels about them?”
And the overwhelming response was- horrible, over the top, very high, through the roof.
In this episode, I wanted to discuss this and offer a maybe different perspective on this.
Episode Pointers:
- Please don’t let yourself do the shame cycle.
- Shame does nothing in helping you, all it does is keep you cycling exactly
where you are at.
- After Aria died, I was also diagnosed with PTSD. I was so so anxious. I couldn’t relax in the evening, I remember sitting on my chair in the living room while my kids were sleeping, and I would be a tense ball of stress.
sity, gentleness, love, and compassion for yourself are some of your best tools.
- There is nothing wrong with the anxiety you feel. I know- here I talk about all the bad things about anxiety and you wonder how you can get rid of it, but it doesn’t work that way. Relax into the anxiety, and stop judging it. Don’t try to get rid of it, and just let yourself learn to sit in the energy of anxiety without needing to do anything.
- Often, asking someone who doesn’t have the same debilitating anxiety as you can be helpful, but only if you have been able to be okay with just sitting in the anxiety and not trying to change it or having to follow through with what your anxiety is trying to make you do.
- You can tell yourself that this is what your brain does. Your brain is giving you the worst case scenarios because it’s trying to protect you. This doesn’t mean they are going to happen or are happening. This is just your brain.
You are not your thoughts. You are not your anxiety.
- I wanted to highlight how crucial it is for you to get help for yourself. Because the anxiety you feel not only affects you, but everyone else around you.
- If your anxiety is so debilitating you can’t do anything to even begin getting help and learning the tools to navigate it, I want to encourage you to go see your doctor and see if medication would be a good step for you. It’s so important to use all the tools that are available to you. Go get the medication if you need, then dive deep into doing the deep work of calming your body down, learning tools to manage anxiety and manage your mind.
You have more control over your anxiety than you think.
Registration for Relief in Grief is now open! It’s my 3 day workshop diving into all things grief and child loss. If you are ready to begin picking up the pieces of your shattered heart, and learn how to hold space for grief and joy, come join me and the other moms in this 3 day workshop. It’s going to be amazing and you don’t want to miss it! Go to www.reliefingriefsupportgroup.com to register
If you want to apply for a spot for 1:1 Grief Coaching, go to www.meganhillukka.com/griefcoaching
If you are a grieving mother and looking for others who know the pain of child loss, come join my free Grieving Moms Community Facebook group: www.meganhillukka.com/community