Author Diary Entries

066: Favourite polyamory books & relationship books

• Sagan Morrow • Episode 67

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This episode of Indie Author Weekly features some of my personal favourite books about polyamory and relationships. 

As you may already know, my chick lit, new adult, contemporary romance series is called Polyamorous Passions, so basically, I write all about polyamory, ethical non-monogamy, and relationships in general as a fiction author. You can get more info on those books and read them at SaganMorrow.com/books, or by searching “Polyamorous Passions” at your favourite e-bookstore. 

Now, polyamory is something a lot of my readers have many questions about, so that’s why I thought for today it would be great to recommend to you a few books that feature polyamory, so you can learn more about the topic! 

By the way, I shared several of my favourite books for improving your writing in a previous episode of this Indie Author Weekly, so if that’s something you want to learn, you can tune into Episode 59. 

Okay, I have 6 polyamory and relationships books to share with you today… TUNE IN to this episode to hear all about it! 

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Hello friends! Sagan here. Welcome back to Indie Author Weekly, where I share my behind-the-scenes journey of writing and self-publishing books. 

If you’re new to this podcast, I am a productivity strategist for multi-passionate creatives at SaganMorrow.com: I help people manage their time and energy effectively, through customized, actionable strategies that work for your unique life and business. When I’m not teaching about productivity to solopreneurs, I spend my time writing romance novels, and occasionally, business books. And that is what this podcast is all about: the adventures of the author life.

Now let’s get into this episode of the Indie Author Weekly podcast. Today, I want to share some of my personal favourite books about polyamory and relationships. 

As you may already know, my chick lit, new adult, contemporary romance series is called Polyamorous Passions, so basically, I write all about polyamory, ethical non-monogamy, and relationships in general as a fiction author. You can get more info on those books and read them at SaganMorrow.com/books, or by searching “Polyamorous Passions” at your favourite e-bookstore. 

Now, polyamory is something a lot of my readers have many questions about, so that’s why I thought for today it would be great to recommend to you a few books that feature polyamory, so you can learn more about the topic! 

By the way, I shared several of my favourite books for improving your writing in a previous episode of this Indie Author Weekly, so if that’s something you want to learn, you can tune into Episode 59. 

Okay, I have 6 polyamory and relationships books to share with you today… 

First: The Ethical Slut by Janet W. Hardy and Dossie Easton.

This is commonly known as the polyamory bible! It is super readable and insightful, sharing the theory behind ethical non-monogamy, anecdotal examples, thoughtful recommendations for creating your own polyamorous relationship, and more. 

I would strongly recommend that this book be read by everyone. The tips in The Ethical Slut are excellent advice for any kind of relationship, not just non-monogamous relationships. 

Second: Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships by Tristan Taormino

I like how practical and actionable this book is. It features real-life profiles for how people have put these practices into place in their own relationships, and it includes helpful tips for all kinds of different styles of ethical non-monogamy and situations you may find yourself in. If you are considering opening up your relationship or being ethically non-monogamous, then this is an excellent read for you. 

Third: Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari

This book is funny and fascinating! It dives into how dating apps have changed how we date, and combines humorous stories with behavioural research. If you’re in the dating world or curious about what dating is like in this day and age, then I think you’ll get a kick of out this book. 

Also, FYI, it’s not about polyamory—it’s all about relationships and dating. Sidebar, if you like that kind of thing, I also highly recommend Aziz Ansari’s TV show, Master of None.

Fourth: The Offline Dating Method: How to Attract a Great Guy in the Real World by Camille Virginia

I love this book! It’s brilliant. So well-written and with awesome ideas for how to meet people and talk to people and get asked out on dates in real life. I’ve used some of the tips pre-pandemic and it WORKS, y’all. 

I’ve actually read through it a few times and have colour-coded bookmarks in it to mark specific pages that were really helpful. In preparation for when there’s a vaccine for COVID-19, I totally recommend you read this book and start developing your skills. After all, we’re all going to be pretty rusty with in-person flirting by the time we can properly go out and meet people again!

As with Modern Romance, The Offline Dating Method is about relationships and dating, not about polyamory, FYI. 

Also, I found that the tips she features are fantastic not just for getting dates and having romantic conversations, but it was also REALLY helpful for me as a professional. I’m very introverted and I can be kind of awkward at networking events and that sort of thing—small talk isn’t my forte. I liked that I could use the same techniques outlined in The Offline Dating Method and apply them to all kinds of different communication and relationship interactions, not just the romantic situations.

Fifth: Perv: The Sexual Deviant in All of Us by Jesse Bering

The guy I dated when my spouse and I first opened up our relationship lent this to me, that was a year or two ago, and this book is fantastic. It’s a well-researched and thoughtful exploration of sexuality, and it will absolutely help you to look at things from a whole new perspective. I also like how accessible the information is—Bering did a great job of compiling the information and making it really interesting and fun to read.

Sixth: Sex at Dawn: How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jetha

If you’re considering ethical non-monogamy but you have a lot of hang-ups or internalized disapproval of the lifestyle, then you’ll find this historical account to be a useful guide of starting to unpack your biases. It’s a neat look at how our relationships have changed over time and across different types of societies. 

To recap, those 6 polyamory and relationships books included: 

  • The Ethical Slut by Janet W. Hardy and Dossie Easton
  • Opening Up by Tristan Taormino
  • Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari
  • The Offline Dating Method by Camille Virginia
  • Perv by Jesse Bering
  • Sex at Dawn by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jetha

Now, I’d love to hear your thoughts on this. Connect with me on Twitter and Instagram, @Saganlives, to chat about it! And you can send me a message on either of those platforms if you have requests for future episode topics, too. The more you tell me what you’d like to see more of on this podcast, the better that I can accommodate that. You can also submit your questions or topic ideas anonymously at SaganMorrow.com/question. 

If you enjoyed this episode, please take 2 minutes to share this podcast on social media and subscribe and rate it on Apple Podcasts—any time you share it or leave a rating or review, it helps more listeners find the Indie Author Weekly podcast, so every bit counts! I really appreciate your support.

By the way, you can access complete word-for-word transcripts of this episode and all past episodes, plus sample chapters of my books and a few other bonuses and goodies, on the “secret” version of this podcast. Get access to all of that at SaganMorrow.com/secretpodcast.

Thanks so much for tuning in to the Indie Author Weekly podcast, and I will see you in the next episode. 

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Sagan Morrow

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