You Winning Life

Ep. 118-"Failure Is Success In Progress" with Erik Cabral

January 05, 2022 Jason Wasser, LMFT Season 1 Episode 118
You Winning Life
Ep. 118-"Failure Is Success In Progress" with Erik Cabral
Show Notes Transcript

Erik Cabral is the founder of the media agency, On Air Brands; the innovative networking; the real estate investment company Mindado Investment Group; host, co-host, and producer on multiple shows: Entrepreneurs Circle, Capital Hacking, Cashflow Ninja, and VaynerMedia’s Chief Heart Officer Claude Silvers’ show, “Emotional Optimism: Living in the Silver Lining”. With multiple businesses, partnerships, and podcasts Erik is the quintessential “serial entrepreneur” who spends much of his time helping others grow their businesses, brands, and reputation.

We discuss:

  • Entrepreneurship as a platform for personal growth and self development in disguise
  • what risks are worth it to take
  • how Erik went from working for a company to starting up his own businesses
  • how to move forward even when your family gives your crap
  • pros and cons of being an entrepreneur 
  • what its like to partner with Gary Vaynerchuk on a project
  • the difference between a side hustle and creating a business
  • learning how to know your value in the world
  • focusing on your core values so you can make more "right" decisions

and so much more!

Follow Eric
https://www.erikcabral.co
https://www.instagram.com/erikecabral

Please do me a favor, subscribe, leave a positive review on iTunes, follow us on Instagram and share if you know anyone who would benefit from this or other episodes!

Do you want to work with me? Reach out and let me know!
https://www.instagram.com/youwinninglife/


Thank you for joining me on this ride!

Jason Wasser Therapist/Coach
Online Tele-Therapy & Coaching 🖥
The Family Room Wellness Associates
Certified Neuro Emotional Technique Practitioner 
🎧Host:You Winning Life Podcast
🎤Available for speaking engagements

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Now, here's your host, licensed marriage and family therapist, certified neuro, emotional technique practitioner and certified entrepreneur coach.

Jason Wasser.

Oh, man.

Guys, if you were here and listening to our last hour of conversation, that was part of our podcast episode was supposed to start an hour ago.

All the real deal stuff of personal development of life struggles of business struggles of teammates, of strategy, of partnership, of healing, of emotions, handling your stuff as you evolve as a business owner as an entrepreneur, my next guest and I have been just going really deep, and we're going to continue the conversation for the next little bit because we want you to hear so much of what's going on in each of our worlds and the behind the scenes story of what it takes to become a healthy entrepreneur.

Everybody talks about being a successful entrepreneur, but let's focus today on a healthy entrepreneur.

And I got Eric Cabral, who I was supposed to be hanging out with over a year and change ago, and if not more.

But we finally connected today, and he's a real estate and capital business investor.

He's a media branding expert.

He's a serial entrepreneur, founder of the media agency on Air Brands, the creator of the Pod Max networking and podcasting event co host and producer of numerous shows.

And he sits on the board of Real Estate Investor Group.

And he's a proud member of Go Abundance, which is supporting a tribe of millionaires to further reach their goals all the way from the northeast of Jersey.

Eric, thanks for hanging out, man.

Yeah, brother.

It's an honor to be here.

And I'm glad we had a podcast that wasn't recorded.

This is part two, folks you're witnessing part two, so, yeah, it's good.

It's funny you never know what's going to happen in not just the podcast world, but just in life.

And I appreciate your time and everything we already uncovered and discovered together.

So I'm looking forward to this now officially recording.

I'm beyond honored because I know that you and I talked about this already, but just like, like minded people showing up at the right time in your life.

And we both talked a little bit about our entrepreneur behind the scenes journey that we'll probably get into at some level, whether or not today, but definitely in the future to share a little bit more.

But there's so much going on.

So I want to start with this cereal entrepreneur title and being gluten free.

I avoid cereal as much as possible, but I know that I remember hearing you and I just talked about how I got from being a therapist into the entrepreneurial world that this word entrepreneur kind of was like this dirty, biased thing that I had against.

And we just talked about your belief of what an entrepreneur is.

So first I want to start there with that awesome definition that as you were saying it to me, I started cracking up.

I'm like that's my definition, too.

So share with us your approach.

What is entrepreneurship according to you?

Yeah.

The quote that you're referencing that I said, and I didn't come up with this.

And I'm sure it's being said around the interwebs.

But when I left Corporate America after 20 plus years and joined the Entrepreneur Club and being a proud business owner, trying to figure all that out, really, just to replace my salary was the ultimate goal.

Nobody told me that entrepreneurship is personal growth and self development in disguise.

I only heard that recently, brother.

And I'm like, what?

Yeah, I know this now, but I didn't know it then, and I'm glad I didn't, because maybe I wouldn't have done it because everyone knows how painful it is to grow and to Peel layers back and to open the doors and unlock your mind and your spirit and your heart, to discover your issues, your baggage, your crap.

You need to eat that and you need to digest it, and you need to look at it and you need to figure it all out or you're not going to grow.

You're not going to get to the next level.

Your business is not going to get to the next level.

It's all interwoven and connected.

No idea until I committed to being an entrepreneur.

Yeah.

And I think it's so interesting because as a therapist who avoided that title because of its sales and I didn't want to go into my family business.

And we were talking about me being the black sheep or at least the way.

And now I'm working with family businesses and entrepreneurs.

And it was like this whole big thing, like I had to re accept unclaimed or UN owned parts of myself that I originally had issues with in order to heal that in order to come to a place that actually was part of my purpose and my potential.

And that 100% realizing that in my own journey over the last four, five, six years in this entrepreneurship space, it is personal potential possibilities.

And it's unlimited personal potential possibilities because the things that are happening for me now, I never thought four years ago, five years ago that I have a podcast and I'm talking to people that are just people that I admire and look up to and only have seen on social media, and they're saying yes to hanging out with me.

I would never fathom that.

And when you were in Corporate America, right.

So you were working inside companies or a company.

What was that space?

What were you doing?

And how did you end up there in the first place, going into corporate America.

What led you there?

Yeah.

So the programming, I'd say my upbringing, my family, immigrants from the Philippines, understood that in America, to achieve the American dream, we need to get our high school diploma and go to College, a good College, and then use that as a way to get in the door of a great company.

And then when you get hired, you stay there.

You are corporate through and through.

And you stay there for 40 years, and you collect your gold watch and your steak knives at the end, and then you go off into the sunset.

Right?

That was the goal.

And I did it for over 20 years and realized, Jason, that I wasn't happy.

Why was I so unhappy?

Why am I not feeling satisfaction?

Even though I'm making a good salary?

I've got it all.

I've got the house, I've got the cars, I got the wise, I got the kids, the American dream.

I accomplished it right.

And here I am, having a conversation with my father on the deck, and he's saying, what's next?

I'm like, Dude, what like, this house is five times bigger than the house we grew up in.

Is this not enough for you?

I kind of thank him.

Now.

In hindsight, it pushed me to do what I'm doing now.

But at the time, I was like, I've made it right.

I think I've made it, but I still didn't get Daddy's approval, right?

That's a whole onion to Peel there.

But anyway, so glad to be here with you.

Can I just lay down on the couch?

Exactly the metaphorical therapeutic couch that I no longer have since I closed my office.

It looks comfy from what I see behind you.

Exactly.

Yeah.

So that journey.

And I do agree with you, right?

This journey of unfinished business, this journey of our family legacy, embedded in culture, embedded in all of these layers of, like, I just want to call politics at a simple level, approval acceptance, having proved yourself at some level.

So when you started getting that unhappiness, that lack of satisfaction, what was the deciding factor?

That's, like, all right, that's it.

I'm done.

I know what I want to do.

Maybe I'm starting to build what I want to do on the side.

What does that process look like?

Was it a side hustle?

What was that first step into shifting out of working for someone else, being that person?

That was an employee to going and creating something for yourself.

Yeah, I dabbled.

I started companies and failed in those companies over time while I was working full time, and a lot of that had to do with my lack of commitment, lack of confidence, falling into the safety net of that weekly salary.

I was like, Why am I doing this?

Why am I killing myself?

It's not going anywhere.

It won't go anywhere.

Just all the limiting beliefs and the self talk, and I was just caught up in what most people are caught up in.

That's a challenge.

And I work at it every single day.

And I mentioned the untethered soul that helped me and gave me permission to say, Shut up to that voice that's always chattering.

It's not always if you look at the odds.

Statistically, it has not been giving you the best advice throughout your life.

Correct.

So I'm like, Why am I listening to this?

As if it's the voice of God or the universe like, you're wrong.

Sometimes shut up.

So anyway, Untethered Soul highly recommend that book, Michael a singer.

So I forgot your question.

Keep going, keep going.

When did you like the side of building it up?

My hand was sort of forced, but it was going to happen eventually.

Anyway, the universe was going to it wasn't going to allow me to collect that gold watch after 40, whatever years, it was really the second time I was being laid off.

I evaluated my situation, and I love the Tony Robbins saying, and I'm sure I'll Butcher this one.

But he says people won't make a change until the state that they're in is more painful than the act of changing, becoming something else.

You have to come to the realization like this.

I don't want to continue being this way.

And in this situation, I'm going to take the effort as much as it's going to be painful and scary and hard.

I'd rather do that than stay the same.

Right?

That's that forcing.

And in the recovery world, that's the rock bottom for a lot of people.

Yeah, right.

And then some people still don't.

It takes multiple rock bottoms.

Or in our world, it could be like, Well, I'm moving from company to company, job to job and nothing's different.

And I see that all the time.

In fact, one of my coaching clients that I'm working with is they're like, I think I want to leave South Florida, and I'm like, Great, where you go, where you want to think about going.

And they said, and I'm like, okay, so you want to sell everything and just pick up and go.

I'm like, do me a favor, go for a week, go for a week, get an Airbnb here's the places in that area that are all the young, professional, cool places to go and then come back and then tell me, wait comes back a few weeks later.

I actually did it.

Dude, it sucked.

I have no desire to live there.

I'm like, oh, you mean so the setup you have right now is actually not so bad.

And you're just leveraging it.

Grass is greener.

But the pain point sometimes is going and seeing and realizing that, you know what?

Maybe I'm not putting everything in presently to what I could be doing, where I'm at and sometimes like, yours.

It just wasn't satisfactory.

You weren't getting that satisfaction.

Yeah.

Something was missing from your purpose.

100%.

Yeah.

I've noticed that when I do occasionally talk to someone from that world, that's still in it.

That's a reoccurring theme.

It's lack of purpose, because oftentimes in big companies and corporations, their core values, their mission isn't often, doctor, it's not a great word, but indoctrinate is the first thing I can think of.

And it's not pushed enough inside corporate America.

We call it drinking the Kool Aid.

Right.

And if you don't have enough people, that understand why they're getting up in the morning and why they're turning on that computer and why they're pushing out these emails and doing whatever it is.

I didn't coin this, but a co worker of mine said, I feel like a Pixel monkey sometimes because we're graphic designers and we're creatives, and we just do what they say.

You want fries.

With that.

There was so much bitterness and anger and resentment towards getting orders from your boss to do your job.

Basically, we should be grateful that we're here and we're getting paid and you're more probably just on Facebook all day.

Right.

Everybody would complain.

It's like, I wish I had the attitude.

Now you need us more than we need you.

Right.

Exactly.

And it was that realization that I was stuck in that rut, and I was angry.

The people around me were angry, and I needed to change.

I need to be around a different environment.

And I just was yearning for something, a light at the end of the tunnel that would.

And it was this.

It was getting into business.

Owning a business and creating a business was always showing up in my life and teasing like, hey, I'm here for you.

If you ever want to really explore that idea, you have we offer to get uncomfortable.

Yeah.

If you want to really get uncomfortable.

But like I said earlier, I wish I knew it's two, three jobs, because working on yourself is a full time job, correct.

Every single day it's work.

And I appreciate it for what it's done for me.

It's so interesting because as you're telling that story, I'm reflecting back on my job that I had in a nonprofit while I was in graduate school.

And there were so many things I loved about working there.

And then there was the challenge of that.

They still tried to run this nonprofit, like a business, but they weren't running it as a business.

They were still running it like, well, we got to get our dues and we got to get our things, and we got to charge for every little thing that we're doing.

But I'm like, Well, it's a nonprofit, and we can't milk them if they already don't have it.

And I remember having a conversation with one of the board members.

It was actually the President of the board about the activities and events that the Department that I was running.

And I remember having the realization in that conversation that the janitor of the building walked by out of my office, walk by past my office, and I realized that he and I were exactly the same.

We're both hired help and everybody's interchangeable.

And if you're not going to do this for us, even though this is our agenda or you don't align or we don't buy into even though there was a buying into the purpose and the mission of it.

But it's just swappable parts.

And I feel a lot of ways in that corporate like you were describing, if there's people who work for a company and there's people who buy into the company, the mission, Apple is really good at that.

They have their cult of Apple, and you see it.

And it was much bigger, obviously, a couple of years ago, but it's still that thing.

Starbucks really good with that.

There's a company culture and it's culture driven versus a company that you do your job, you go home at the end of the day, but you're not invested in the values where the company doesn't even have clear values or doesn't have values at all.

It's just we're here to make money and you'll get a paycheck.

And I think that's where a lot of people now, our generation and a lot of people older than us struggle with this.

Like what do you mean, just go do your job, you get your money, you take care, you got to take care and you go home.

And our generation.

And what that generation is complaining about about our generation is what do you mean, you need a purpose?

What do you mean?

You need to feel good at the end of the day about what you do.

You have responsibilities.

That's what you should feel good about, right.

And it makes sense, right.

And to defend that generation, it was an industrial revolution.

They were products of that, and they're still churning and producing and creating people that are going to the industry.

But there's a movement.

And this is the one positive about social is that it's created awareness around the positive benefits of being an entrepreneur and a business owner.

And like you said, when I was growing up, there wasn't a stigma attached in my mind to the word entrepreneur because I was not in it.

So I came at a time and we referenced Gary Vee before the mics turned on where that was sexy, right?

We're all using that term.

I even named my show Entrepreneur Circle out of it's.

Cool.

It's sexy.

People know how to spell it, but yeah, you'll find it.

But here's the thing for anyone out there who's wondering, man, they're not really.

I want to be an entrepreneur.

I want to create my own business.

I have a side.

Also, I want to create one.

It isn't easy.

It's very hard.

And there's a reason why, after ten years, I think it's less than 1% of businesses, you could fact check this.

I could be wrong.

Survive after ten years, that's basically you have 99% chance to fail.

Especially in specific industries like the food, restaurant industry.

Within five years, it's 50% failure.

Yeah, and the odds are so weighed against.

It's insane how we do this, but there's a driving.

There's something in our DNA.

There's something in human nature where we like, we need to create.

We need to build, like you said, we need to have purpose.

And that's the question that people don't ask themselves.

What is my purpose if you ask that question?

Oh, man, that's the unlock look out, because if you find and people also call it their why.

But to me, purpose is more powerful.

And when I say that and I literally was talking to a friend about this the other day, I said, What's your purpose?

He started crying on the phone.

So I mean, that's how strong it is could be for us.

So what's your purpose, dude?

I don't want to get emotional, but I'll spit it out so I don't get emotional.

But my purpose came to me while I was meditating in divine entity.

Whatever it is poured into my brain at five in the morning, and I literally cried, dude, I started pouring emotions and tears when this came to me, but the purpose was for me and now has become my company's purpose because they've adopted it.

They've drank the Koolaid, right?

They get it.

And that is we make the world better.

Or at the time it was, I make the world better.

But the company now makes the world better.

One Mike at a time.

And, dude, when I think about it, I want to keep moving and talking fast, so I don't start crying.

But that is how powerful it was for me, because I understood.

I didn't understand at the time, bro the layers that meant it wasn't just your mic, my mic currently, it's when I introduce someone to you and they make an impact and connect with one listener on your podcast because of that introduction.

And I do that all the time.

And then I also speak on stages.

I also introduce people to speak on stages.

There's microphones on that stage.

So all of this just started to like, you know, branch out.

And I was like, wow, this is so big.

That one phrase is so big.

I didn't realize it when it came to me.

But that's why my body, my spirit, my emotions took hold because it's powerful because you went from corporate into the next step.

And how did that pod Max and the media company?

How did that evolve?

Because this is pretty much what's going on now.

And this is the world that we're living in, where leveraging social media is so easy and such a.

There's a lot of steps to do it behind the scenes, of putting it together in production and stuff like that.

But everything can be leveraged out and thank God for places like Fiverr and all those other wonderful places.

But there are multiple layers to this question.

Number one, how did you know that doing this, specifically podcasting, social media, media, branding, media marketing.

That was the place to go.

And two, when you're talking about that purpose under the purpose, right?

The place where you feel spiritually connected the most.

When did that start showing up and you started feeling it once you started committing to this process.

That part didn't happen right away.

That happened after years of doing what we do and what I do in podcasting, and I call being a super connector and just trying to be as valuable and offer the most value in people's lives without asking for anything in return.

That really started to become part of my DNA, my core values, part of my core values.

But that didn't happen right away when I started the podcast.

Truly, it was a solution to a problem I was having whenever I had conversations with people, what do you do again?

You're creative, you're incorporated, or are you doing real estate investing?

I'm confused.

I see your content, but I don't know exactly what you do.

So I wanted to create one house, one place that they can visit where point them to the door and say, hey, go listen to my podcast and you'll get answers.

You'll hear everything I'm doing right within the first 30 seconds.

There's my introduction and says, hey, here's my story.

So that was really the goal, Jason, I had no idea it was going to open the doors to a million opportunities and people that I love now and consider family.

I had no idea that it was going to build on their brand and do all the things that it's doing for me.

And then now for others.

I was like, this is so powerful when it's done for me.

I need to give this to others.

I need to empower others.

And then now we've got so many clients, dozens of clients where it's like what happens when we have hundreds of clients, like, what is the impact?

We're going to make?

It's just insane.

You're also creating community and your rate.

But the connections is step one to community and finding where people who are like minded fit in.

And we talked about this previous to this, to our recording of the connection of the fitting in and finding your alignment, finding people that have the like minded shared values.

And it's interesting to see that the people I've met through this community more often than not, we're reading the same books.

We're talking about the same people.

We're overlapping at some level.

It's like the Kevin Bacon Seven Degrees Game, and you and I have multiple one degrees of separation of people that we're both connected to and close with.

And it's so cool to see how small and connected the world can be through this, like you said we would never get in front of these people.

I would never get in front of the people I've gone in front of had it not been for this platform and allowing people to share their wisdom with the people that I want to share that with.

And it's like, you know, Hashtag Life Hack 101 is that.

Yeah, a human desire just inherently baked in most of us, not everyone.

But I think even the most introverted of introverted people still need human contact at some point.

This allows us and gives us an excuse to have more and more an abundance of this human connection, which builds so many things.

First of all, it starts the conversation to open the door to a relationship, potentially a transaction for people who want to leverage their podcast as a business.

But I always recommend that you do not lead with that.

Like your conversation is to get to know each other and to get to potentially, it's going to sound corny love each other to a degree where you just want to help you just want to help.

How can I help you?

How can I get you to your mission?

How can I get you to your goals if that's true and genuine people will sense it and they'll feel it and they'll get behind you.

All of a sudden, you have an army of people which can be called the community that love and support you will take bullets for you.

And that's powerful.

Whenever I host an event and I'm on stage and I'm talking to people, I get emotional because I'm like, this is power, and there is so much that I can do to help people, it scares me sometimes.

Jason, honestly, I'm like there are people that have this ability and they don't use it for good, correct.

And that's my mission is to do good with it as we grow and as I grow and have more and more and more conversations, just want to affect change, man, like positive change in the world and align with the journey that humanity is on.

I think that self selecting community is showing up over the last five to ten years, especially in this space where there's so many conferences and masterminds and someone organizing something and bringing all these speakers, and then they're selling stuff from the stage.

There's so much of that sales aspect that kind of turns a lot of people off from the entrepreneurship space.

And then there's the not that they're not of integrity, but it's not always transparent.

As a therapist, my job is to make as much on the table, as much transparency between people and their stuff, whatever it may be as possible.

So everything is discussed.

Everything is negotiable, everything is on the table.

Everything is what can we do and how can we do this?

And how can we make it achievable and uplift both or all sides?

So it's a win win win for everybody when you are collaborating, when you started collaborating, when you started learning how to collaborate with other people, what were some of those steps that you had to take because you were coming from corporate, you were an employee, and I'm sure there were teams around you and people you had to collaborate with at that level.

But when you started having to lead the collaboration, what were some of the things that you learned?

What were some of the challenges that you faced and what were some of the successes.

Some of the early challenges, especially from corporate America, because that's where I first experienced leading and building and growing teams and companies within companies is I guess I got a taste of personal growth and self development, but I didn't know that's what it was.

It was really me putting my ego aside and recognizing that if someone's giving me feedback, I need to take it and process it, keep some of it and throw some of it away because I know that the source may also be injecting their own baggage into their communication to me.

And I had to be able to identify what's good and what's bad that was during my corporate time during that time.

And it was a short period before I left.

Honestly, Jason, maybe like, a few years before I left, so I didn't experience a lot of that, but that level of awareness was starting to happen, and I started to take my one on one seriously.

So one on one for anyone who's not familiar, that is the opportunity for you to talk to your manager and get feedback.

And oftentimes I had managers that were terrible at it, and they didn't want to give negative feedback.

And you're the best.

You're the best.

I love you.

I love you.

Bye.

You want a much great.

And then I had others that were super negative, right.

And they only focus on the negative.

Never, ever celebrated a win.

This is rare, but I had them.

I was blessed to have managers where they were very growth oriented and gave me really good, productive feedback.

And because those people were very self aware and were grounded and had balance in their life.

And I appreciate a big shout out his name's angel.

I've never mentioned him on a podcast.

Angela Rataka was one of the best managers I ever had because he had that quality to him.

And I always remember when I become a manager or when I did become a manager wasn't really I was kind of forced to do it.

He was that example that I leaned in on like, I want to be whatever he did during our relationship, I want to be that for others, and it really helped.

It really helps because I'm like, Whoa, I am creating an army of people that are like, they literally followed me when I left Corporate America and came with me in my company.

Yeah.

Jerry, Maguired it.

And, you know, I wasn't ready for it because I couldn't pay them the $100,000 salaries they were accustomed to.

But that just showed like I had that ability.

And it gave me the confidence that I could inspire troops to run into battle.

And I'm like, what do I do with this ability?

And I think that's the most powerful part of this space, whether you're working in a company like you said, you were building teams and businesses within a company.

And one of my buddies calls that being an entrepreneur.

Yes.

Right.

And that's a word that we don't use enough and that we're like, well, you're either on this side of the world or you're this side of the world.

And yet you can be entrepreneurial within a company.

You could be an entrepreneur, and you can help them build and grow and have more involvement and ask for that.

And dare to ask for that.

I want to make an investment in this company.

I have ideas and thoughts.

And are you open to hearing these things?

And obviously it takes good managers and good owners and good development teams to be receptive to that.

And obviously, if you're not able to get there with those people, then it might be time to look elsewhere.

But people who are thinking it's going to be great somewhere else.

Try it first.

Do this therapeutic process of bringing that awareness to where you are first.

But of course, it has to start with you like you're saying, and then going into this whole thing, you and I were talking about my process of as a therapist and running away from being this, like being a business owner.

Being a therapist didn't mean being a business owner.

I had a business.

It definitely didn't mean being an entrepreneur or being entrepreneurial.

But I'm a therapist, and I have self awareness, so it shouldn't be a mate.

But I was working on my self awareness and evolving and going through my own healing.

And then it really wasn't exponential until I started stepping into this space and learning.

Oh, wait.

They talked about that in graduate school.

Oh, wait.

This book talks about this in the therapy speak, but this is how it shows up.

I didn't know that the business world, the entrepreneur world, the sales world.

The idea of sales was a curse word in my mind.

One thing that because you brought it up a few times.

The sales aspect let's flop rolls here.

For a second, I've realized only recently the exponential growth that we're experiencing is because I leaned into sales, and like you always associate that's a dirty word.

I don't like doing it, but I guess never selling a product that I truly, truly, truly believed in, and I truly believed that it could help someone.

And I wasn't always talking to the right people that needed it.

So I'm trying to sell something to anyone, and I don't believe it could really help them because I'm desperate.

So I started to do, like, there was all this negative Association.

That's just one thing to the word sales and doing the process.

But what I've discovered recently through our success, once I lean into it and realize it's not dirty and it's necessary in order to grow business and to help more people.

And it's okay for people to say no.

I think I was afraid of the rejection I was afraid of no.

And I was afraid of all these things.

There are so many layers and facets to why I dislike sales and why many people don't like sales.

Right.

But there's something very empowering about it when you get good at it and you do it with authenticity and belief in what it is you're trying to give to someone because you're really giving them an opportunity to participate in whatever it is you're doing or to unlock the solution they've been looking for.

This is a gift that you're giving to them.

And once we understand and you embrace that, then sales gets easier.

Yeah.

Yeah.

When I started understanding value over cost, really started changing it.

But that's where feel so many people have that, like, this syndrome of really this imposter syndrome or what I'm doing really isn't enough.

And I was just talking to another therapist the other day about this, and I'm coaching them through this stage of increasing their fees and they know they're really good.

But like, well, I can't because of this.

And there was more excuses for why they can't than why they could.

And intellectually we can't convince sometimes it's not an intellectual thing.

It's all going back to what we start off, our family story and our legacy and our culture and our heritage and all that stuff that we're still playing out.

And that's why this therapeutic process, as part of entrepreneurship, I feel like has to be the one to punch because it's going to show up in your leadership.

It's going to show up in your communication with people.

It's going to show up in your partnerships and all the other stuff, and it's going to cause chaos, and it's going to cause a mess, or it can enhance it.

And you can become radically, radically successful.

And we create our own stumbling blocks through that.

And I saw as I evolved, it wasn't everybody else, the clients that I let in five years ago, seven years ago, or because I let them into my door.

So if they drove me crazy, God bless them.

It was because I let them in.

And I said, I'm the right therapist for you versus now I'm more likely to say, let me refer you out than to take a client on unless they meet these really specific key parameters.

Yeah.

And that's changed everything about my practice.

Yeah.

And it takes a while.

It doesn't happen overnight to find the courage, because when you're starting a company you have to say yes to everything.

Every single opportunity is an opportunity for you to grow and survive.

Right?

We're in survival mode because this is going to feed my family or this I have to do because I burned the boats.

I'm not going back.

So you get desperate and you start to take everything looks and feels like an opportunity.

And you have to say yes because the nose, which we addressed is painful, and I don't want to hear the nose.

And, Whoa, I heard a yes.

So you're like, I love it.

I love it.

I love you.

Let's just work together.

But Meanwhile, when you get to the point where you have enough success and you have enough income and you have enough where you're feeding your family and you're providing then and only then, really, truly, finally getting to experience this, say no to opportunities because they're not opportunities, right?

There's someone that's not aligned with your mission, your goals, and you aren't the best person to help them.

And like you said, you can point them in the right direction.

You can point them in the right direction.

If I'm sitting as a business owner, let's just use restaurants for an example, and it's a Steakhouse.

And someone comes up to my door and says, I am so hungry.

I'm like, hey, come on in.

This is a restaurant we'll serve you.

I'm a vegan.

Oh, I'm sorry.

You know what?

This isn't the place for you right down the road, my buddy as a wonderful vegan shop.

So, like, they have a problem and they need a solution.

But you may not be that solution, and that's okay.

It's not nothing personal.

Well, in crisis, they may be okay with the salad and the baked potato, because that's just enough.

But then they're going to go into another scenario where they're just looking for just enough versus actually handling the thing under the thing.

The problem under the problem, the stuff that really sticks it and holds it together.

And that's kind of where I'm looking at everything from a therapist is like, you guys come in like, whoever comes in and I'm like, you've described this challenge or problem or issue, and that's the mountain that you need to get over.

But what I'm going to help you realize is that that's not a mountain.

That's only, like, a little bit of a speed bump.

But there's some other bigger mountain behind that that's really holding it all together that you can't even see because you've conjured up this thing of your dominant focus on.

And if we solve that, what would you then allow yourself to look forward to?

What would you then allow yourself to take on?

What would you then be able to have?

The energy, the time, the space where the mental capacity to finally get handled like, oh, well, I would find it.

So why don't we just address that?

And that will probably knock out the first thing that you came up to hang out with me for, but no one looks at that from that way because it's always what's right in front of us.

It's the Headlight syndrome.

I only get ten yards in front of me.

I don't see the next 20 yards, right.

And I want to handle all of that and then reverse engineer it.

And I love that these are the awarenesses, because everything you're talking about in business really is personal development stuff.

It's knowing your value, knowing what you're offering the value of that and acceptance.

Will they like me?

Will they not like me selling something or them buying or partnering with me or doing a deal with me mean that they really like me.

And then there's the other side of the rejection element.

So I'm wondering, and I'm putting out there for people out there listening of the many things you can focus on, 2022 is those two dynamics.

I'm really curious to hear by the end of the year what's going to happen in transition in your life of acceptance and value and handling rejection?

Can I share something that we've mostly, especially if you're in this game and you're consuming content like this and you listen to Jim Rohn and Tony Robbins.

I went to Tony Robbins live event, his first after two years, and I've heard this before through his content, but it didn't drive home until I went, and I heard it over and over, and it really sunk in, right.

It embedded.

And he said there are really only four.

So six things.

But I'll mention the top four things that every human being needs.

And if you can identify it right away in conversation and you're already shaking your head.

Yes.

Because you know, what I'm going to say is number one, they either want certainty if they don't want certainty or if it's not certainty, they want uncertainty.

There's a lot of entrepreneurs that want to jump out of planes and do scary, risky things.

They thrive on risk taking.

And that's a good trait to be an entrepreneur because we need to take big risks.

So then after that, there's significance, right?

They want significance in the world.

And I realize that is one of the reasons I started my podcast.

I wanted to be validated.

I needed significance.

I needed people to listen to me in order for me to value myself and to realize that I have value and to uncover unlock that value, I didn't really know truly what it was.

If you go back to my early shows, what the heck I'm talking about?

I'm trying to figure it out, right?

And still figuring it out to this day.

And then the last thing is love and connection.

That's the top four.

Right.

So when you're talking to someone, what bucket do they fall in?

What do they need out of those four things?

But then when you get to the next level which is I am slowly clawing my way towards is fifth is growth and 6th is contribution.

And when you get to that level, bro.

And I know there's a lot of people in my world that are in the contribution phase and in the growth phase with us.

And I'm like, I look to them to lead.

I look to them for inspiration.

But those top four things, it's everyone, anyone and everyone in your family are looking for those uncertainty, uncertainty, significance, loving connection.

And then when you talk to people who talk about growth and contribution, yeah, I'm there.

I've arrived and I need to be around more of this because that's going to give and provide me growth through their teachings.

It's so awesome because I know that I'm no longer at a price point where everybody can afford me as a therapist coach, and one of my clients two months ago said to me like, I think I'm going to start coming every two weeks.

Great.

That's amazing.

I'm so glad we're at that point because I don't want you right.

I like eventually becoming the oil change come to me every 3000 miles, three months or 3000 miles, whichever comes first.

And she said, I've been listening to your podcast so much that I literally have you in my head when a situation comes up and be like, okay, so in that episode, Jason said this about that topic, and I need to pay an X amount of dollars to know that I'm going to go sit with them and we're going to talk about that.

And that's probably what I'm going to come to my own awareness of that anyway.

And I'm like, fantastic.

I'm glad I'm putting myself out of business in that scenario.

And really I joke with them.

I'm like, that was on episode 72, like in a session or that was episode 68.

Right.

Like, what's my homework?

Go listen to that episode and it may not even be mine.

Go listen to this person or go listen to this person or watch this Ted talk or watch this YouTube video.

And I'm constantly constantly referring people to other friends or people that I don't even know his podcast or this episode or that book or untethered soul.

I think that's the beauty of where that influence can be felt of like, this is some information.

This is some wisdom I gathered here's how it could be applicable to you.

But we also have to challenge people to go do that, spend 15 minutes on that video, listen to that hour podcast or whatever.

Like the effort.

I think that the thing that people need to realize is it takes effort and it takes inertia and it takes consistency.

And Sean and Lacey friends of yours were on my episode a few weeks ago, and there episodes out.

Now.

We talked about decisiveness as a really important factor in success.

And that the the more people that they see in the community who are the most successful have become the most decisive.

And I think that is a key factor.

And the commitment to growth and the courage to respond to whatever comes your way as an opportunity to explore.

What did I do incorrectly?

What can I learn from this experience so that I can do it better next time?

That's difficult, man.

And it's difficult to recognize those things.

Number one.

But I also want to empower or at least give permission to the audience because I needed this.

I needed to hear this.

Failure is often looked at as not an option, but to me when I discovered and I got the unlock, which I don't have tattoos.

Jason.

But if I ever did, failure is success in progress.

Failure is success in progress.

Bro was a game changer, an upgrade to the operating system that's never going away.

And I was like, what if that is a good thing?

I should be failing, right.

And then you hear all the stories and Edison with the ball 10,000 times and you hear all these stories.

But that was the one thing that resonated with me and gave me permission to explore, to fail, to try everything.

And that's where I go back to your earlier question, which I didn't jump into was, Why is cereal entrepreneur?

What is that label about that's lack of focus?

Honestly, that's not knowing what I needed to do and just exploring and everything was an opportunity.

And I jumped into so many different categories and so many different businesses on multiple businesses.

Technically, I don't even know do it at this .8 LLCs, one S Corp.

And a C Corp.

Seriously, that's crazy.

And only maybe three of those two and half of those are operational.

Right.

And that's a lot of stuff to constantly every year to do your annual filing.

It's crazy.

Yeah, I'm closing every year.

Yeah, it's crazy.

And it's like that was lack of focus.

I now finally in focus, and it's a blessing.

I'm like, Man, this is good.

This is nice.

Well, how would it answer that if someone was asking that as a question of, like, how do I focus or how do I know what's the next thing to do?

How do I know what's the right field?

What's the right school to go to the right decision?

The right job, the right partner is reverse engineering.

It for a very simple way.

Once you tell me your core values, then everything can come from a binary yes or no.

So in other words, if you know, don't tell me that people focus on, well, I don't know what industry to go into.

And I'm really curious about these five industries.

Okay, great.

What are your core values about what you want to be doing in your career, from a professional side, from that type of side?

And then once you define what those core values are, five to seven core values with a definition of what those mean to you now, which one of those industries align with that and the ones that don't kick them out.

But I might have three choices.

That's awesome.

Then nothing is going to be the wrong decision as long as it aligns with your values.

Your biggest challenge is which one you're going to do first.

And that's where the administrative, entrepreneurship or making a decision or a commitment issues that we seem to have in this generation.

But it won't be a wrong decision.

They'll all be right decisions as long as it lies.

So it's a much easier, much more simplistic way of making decisions instead of like, what should I do?

What's the right decision is?

Well, tell me your core values and then what aligns with that and then roll out everything that doesn't 100% so good.

And it's funny, because we're more familiar with core values for corporations.

They've determined what moves the needle and how you get everyone on the same page.

And only recently, I imagine, and only in my world that we adopted this into life, in our businesses and in our life.

So I came up with the core values to my company.

I don't know, a few years ago, and then I only created my core values, my personal core values recently, over the past six months to a year.

And that has been the answer to whenever there's a question that arises, and I don't know the answer.

Should I take this opportunity?

Should I work with this person?

Should I take this client on, and I go to my core values first, the company's core values, and now my team, they're amazing.

They even spit it back.

Is this something?

This is not aligned with our core value for this one?

And I'm like you're.

So right then we walk away from this one.

But I love how you're saying, like, everything becomes binary at this point.

It's yes or it's no.

And it's very clear the picture when you have that.

And I do want to share something that I'm doing.

This is new rather than coming up with goals for 2022, because we're around that time not to date the podcast.

I know we want to create evergreen content here, but if it's any new year, anything that's coming on, whatever it is, the month I'm creating themes.

Right.

So my theme for 2022 is to move towards and align with anything that speaks to freedom and mutual respect.

Now, anything that is the opposite of that, I am heading for the Hills.

I am running from it that's power and control, whether it's business, relationships, friendships, opportunities that present themselves.

Does this look like something?

Does this look like a client?

Does this look like a person?

It's all about power and control.

Yeah, thank you.

But no, thank you.

Are you all about freedom and mutual respect for each other?

I'm all in bro.

Let's continue the conversation so that's my 2022, and we'll see how that all shakes out.

It's already shaking out.

We've spoken about this before the lights turned on a little bit, and then now it helped me to make a decision.

This is the challenging things that people listening need to know that it's not like you said.

It's not all sexy, and it's not all I love quoting Gary Vee.

It's not all Yay rah, rah.

It's sometimes in the trenches, and it's emotional and it's gutwrenching and it's real and it's raw and it's hard and it's meaningful and change worthy and beautiful and frustrating.

It's all everything wrapped up because it's real and it's emotional.

And I was flipping pages.

Those of you who are listening to the audio, you probably heard the paper crinkling.

And I have my 2022 right here from my accountability group that I had my business accountability team.

I had them all fly in and we did a retreat two weekends ago, and my personal values and my business values.

But the three themes, values that I'm going to enhance that I want to enhance in 2022 are from our buddies that we just talked about decisiveness, something that I know that I need to be more consistent on consistency and compassion, even though that's what I do all day is as a therapist, as a coach, I want to work from a place of compassion, but my focus has to be am I giving myself the compassion that I'm giving my clients?

Yeah, that's powerful and beating myself up and giving myself crap in the ways that I know I should not be at 43 anymore.

That's the three value the three themes for my 2022, the decisiveness, the consistency and the compassion.

I want to definitely talk about that more over the next year, along with my goals and for each of my personal professional life and my first quarter goals.

But it's really going back to where we started as we round out, our conversation is how you do.

One thing is how you do everything, and it's going to show up in your personal life, whether you're doing this entrepreneurial thing or you're entrepreneur and you're working as an employee, it's going to show up.

It's going to show up in your relationships.

It's going to show up in your money, it's going to show up in your food, it's going to show up in your spirituality.

It's going to show up in your body.

Yeah.

Absolutely.

I don't know the overall sort of thread throughout this that people are going to take away because maybe this will be a good contrast because I know a lot of podcasts out there are, like rashumba.

Entrepreneurship is the great and shiny, and I'm a success and listen to my stories, and it's going to inspire you to take the leap.

And I remember doing a lot of shows that way, like my podcast guesting on others.

And now I step in fully vulnerable, fully transparent truly honest.

Right.

And now Jason and I have been sharing that.

It's not easy.

There's a lot of not just speed bumps, but there's a lot of spikes, and there's a lot of caverns and holes unreal.

So yes, all that.

But trust me, when I say it's all worth it, because it drives our purpose in life.

This is why we're doing it.

If you don't have that strong purpose, that's going to move mountains, then yes.

Maybe entrepreneurship is not for you.

You have to find the why my why at first was my family.

And everybody is always like, my family.

I got inspired and a lot of people get inspired to make more money when they start having kids.

And that was my trigger.

That was the light bulb.

And I'm like, what am I going to do to provide?

How do I take this to the next level?

How do I create financial freedom for us?

How do I do all these things?

Oh, here's the answer.

Real estate investing, starting my own business.

Read Rich dad, poor dad, Robert Kiyosaki.

And I was like, I need to live in one of these four quadrants Espi, and it's like and I highly recommend go check out that book or if you haven't read Richard, I'd read that first.

But when I got that purple pill and I took it and I committed, it's so worth it.

Yes.

My why was family, and it's always forever will be.

But the true purpose didn't come until what I said earlier, making the world better.

One Mike at a time is going to move the mountains.

It's not just going to provide for my family, but it's going to provide for other people, creating something that has value in this world.

And when I started to embrace that dude, that gets me up every morning.

And it's worth all the struggles.

And this is each like you're saying each one of those things is its own developmental stage.

Because when I first read Rich dad, poor dad, my friend gave it to me.

Actually, his copy is still sitting here from he lent it to me.

If you happen to be listening to my I have your rich dad, poor dad.

So hit me up.

But at that point, I wasn't a vessel for it.

I wasn't a vessel for it, right?

It's funny.

I'm sure like you and I have many overlapping books on our bookshelves there's sometimes like, we're just not right.

The untethered soul.

The first time I read it, I couldn't get past the first two chapters.

And how many times I remember sitting at the pool had to be at least 15 years ago when I first got that book sitting at the pool outside of my condo on a Saturday afternoon.

And I literally read that first chapter or the first paragraphs of the first chapter twelve times.

And it just wasn't saturating.

And I'm Super into spirituality and different philosophies and adding it to my Jewish background and mysticism and all that stuff like that.

And I love all that stuff and using it as commentary to enhance my life.

It just didn't saturate because I wasn't the vessel yet.

And the key word is yet for that.

But then a few years ago, the Ten X role, which is behind you like, oh, that's about the same effort to do this is the same effort that we spend on lower frequency stuff and all those things, and that was able to be received.

And now I can go back and read the rich dad, poor dad again.

Now I can go back and read on Tethered Soul again.

Now I may be ready for the miracle morning.

Maybe I'm going to try it's on my ipad.

So I want people to also realize that there are developmental stages to this process.

That's why it's important to have mentors.

That's why it's important to have coaches.

That's why it's important to have therapist.

You and I were talking about having your even if you don't know them personally, you don't have to know Gary V or Tony Robbins or Oprah or Brene Brown personally to get their wisdom, commit to doing.

I'm going to do 30 hours, January or February or March or April or whatever it is.

Pick a person that you want to devour their content for that month.

And maybe that's a twelve month theme for somebody picking twelve people different areas of my life that I want mentorship on.

I want guidance on and devour the best person that you know in that industry or who someone rep can recommends and make March a vulnerability month with Brene Brown.

How can I be more vulnerable?

How can I connect more to people?

Such good advice?

Here's my question.

It's a question, and it's a statement at the same time.

And you can Peel this.

I'm sure all day going down this path the biggest challenge that I had, and I'm sure a lot of people who are potentially listening is that going down this road of personal growth, self development, counseling, therapy, whatever you want to call it is first admitting that you potentially need help.

And the thing is, a lot of people, especially in our culture, can't admit that maybe there's something wrong.

Maybe they need fixing.

That's why I'm not broken.

Jason, why are you coming to me like that?

And they get defensive because it's like, I don't need to be fixed.

I ain't broke.

It's not about that.

It's about unlocking something that can show you your true potential.

And I know that sounds corny and very Oprah, but it's freaking true.

How do you unlock your true potential if you're staying stuck in a box and you don't even know you live in a box?

It's humility.

It's humility.

I think at the end of the day and again, I was joking with one of my clients that when I recommended for them to listen to a Gary Vee episode.

I'm like, all right, ignore all the fbombs, but he would have been a really good therapist if he wasn't doing what he was doing.

Very direct, though very direct.

I don't know about his bedside matter.

But I think that's a shtick.

But the humility of realizing that you want to be around people that are smarter than you, you want to be around people that are more successful than you.

You never want to be the person that has it the most figured out in your room.

And what was that one quote he said, like, you have to figure out who of the five people you spend the most time with, who's the most loserist friend.

And if you can't figure it out, it's probably you.

It's so good, right?

And I'm like, D***, but that's where the humility comes in of, like, taking stock and accounting and accountability of our attributes and our character traits.

What's the character trait we want to work on this year?

What's the attribute we want to work on this year?

That's why for me, you and I are very aligned with that.

These are the three aspects of ourself that I want to work on in 2022.

So I want to challenge anybody who's listening to this.

Pick one, forget three.

Pick one element of yourself.

That's a pain point.

That's a sticking point.

And get humble about it.

Maybe it is your humility.

Pick naturopathy, pick a character trait that you think will by working on this, and it's probably showing up in more places than you think will make radical changes in your life by the time this time next year.

Yeah, it's good stuff, man.

So this is a good place to hold, because I know, as we have already decided that's probably our listeners can understand what you and I can hit billing on topics.

And we'll definitely do this again for anyone who's listening.

Congratulations.

You're getting to the end of the ride.

But Jason and I have been here for, like, 3 hours.

You're half the conversation.

I know you have an excellent in 15 minutes.

I'm like, I just got to go to the bathroom before my next.

But, Eric, where can everybody find you?

I know you have on Air Brands and you have your website and all the different cool stuff you're doing, but what's the easiest way for people to listen to you and find you?

Yeah.

I mean, the best way to listen to me is to find my show entrepreneur circle, but I'm everywhere.

Eric, eat with a K Cabral.

You can go to Eric Cabral.

Yeah.

Ericabral Co.

I couldn't get caught.

Com.

I have a doppelganger somewhere on the West Coast, and I'm like, I'm going to have to find an assassin and take me just by Jasonwalford Co.

There's a Jasonwalker dot com out there, so hit him up.

If you guys want to buy from, I emailed him.

It's funny because he's a real estate agent.

He's not an investor, but he's an agent.

He's in the space and people confuse it.

They're like, hey, man, I went to your website.

You never responded like, that wasn't my website.

He's getting all this good business.

Yeah, I did email him not to say someone said you should have on your podcast.

I'm like, that would be so weird, but I did make an offer to buy dot com, and he ignored me.

He didn't have anything up yet.

Have you gone on Facebook and started friending all the people with your name?

No, I did that a few years ago, just for fun.

I'm like.

And do we have what are the Jason Washers of the world have in common?

Are we all five foot two?

I don't know.

There's energy with our names, because when we're given our name, there's some type of energy with that.

So I wonder, I'm really curious if you don't want a creepy side project just for fun, for 2022, just start liking.

Just started adding everybody with your name on Facebook.

And like, say, hey, I'm doing an investigation.

This aligns with.

I'm not going to give any spoilers, just a heads up.

But a lot of the multiverse stuff that's going on in the Marvel Universe, DC, like, Flashpoint, they want to tell that story, whereas multiple universes and multiple Batmans.

And they already announced that.

So that's not a spoiler.

But Keaton's coming back as Batman, Bat Fleck, Ben Affleck will be there, but then they're doing it in Marvel.

The multiverse is broken open.

So there's multiple Jason.

Wassers there's multiple Eric Cabrals, find the right one, please.

We beg you.

Yes.

Right onairbrands dot com.

And the other website it is Ericcoveral Co.

Yeah.

Make sure you guys go to the right thing and check out his podcast.

Eric.

Oh, man, this is why I love.

And I know you love doing what you're doing, because like you said, we end up becoming friends with the people a lot of times, and I'm just beyond flattered honor that one.

I was able.

I know we've been scheduling this.

We had to change it on your end, and then on my end, and we finally made it happen.

And the universe made it.

So it's always conspiring.

We just got to work with it.

Exactly.

And it was perfect timing for me personally to have this conversation with you.

So thank you.

My absolute pleasure.

So if you haven't subscribed, if you haven't subscribed to mine, please do it.

Leave us some good feedback.

If you got anything out of this episode or other episodes, if you know someone who has or will benefit from any of these episodes, as well as, like, all the cool stuff that Eric has been talking about, there's just his community is incredible.

His events pod Max, which is one of them that I've been invited to.

And unfortunately, it just never has worked out in my schedule as he and I were talking about beforehand any more advanced notice.

So we're going to talk to our mutual buddy about that.

But there's so much incredible resources just between the books that we recommended today and the videos and the names.

And if you haven't listened to any of their stuff, please go check their stuff out their stuff out as well.

And Eric, my man to be continued.

Absolutely.

Thank you.

Thanks for listening to the new winning Live podcast.

If you are ready to minimize your personal and professional struggles and maximize your potential, we would love it if you subscribe so you don't miss an episode, you can follow us on Instagram and Facebook at youwinninglife.