S3-E4-BUCKET OF BOLTS
INT. TIME BOMB- 18 - 7
LOCATION: Pirates base asteroid.
ALEX ponders what to do and eventually has an idea. She
disables one of the landing legs of the space yacht. The
pirates put them down and force them out of the boat but
doesn't notice that the ship is supported on only two
legs. The only thing maintaining its attitude is the
control moment gyros, which because of the torque forces
are spinning up at an unsustainable rate. The pirate
leader is monologging with his back to the ship and does
not notice the increasing whine until two late. He turns
around and spots the missing leg and realises how
dangerous this is. He rushes back into the ship, but just
as he enters the bearings fail and the boat gets
catapulted across the dock into the other pirate ship,
there is a considerable crash both ships are rendered
unusable. The dock doors get damaged and are open to
vacuum. Pirates get sucked out into space.
PIRATE 2
Sir the yacht is berthed in the
vacuum bay and lock doors are
closed and we are pressurised.
Should we offload the 'prisoners'.
PIRATE 1
Good, yes, yes, get them off and
into the holding cells. I'm sick
of listening to their spoilt
whines.
AIRLOCK THEN
METALIC STEPS
MULTIPLE PEOPLE
SHARROW
So Mister, where the hell are we?
PIRATE 1
None of your business missy. Shut
up or you'll get the back of my
hand or the TASER.
ALEX
So this is the rock you infest?
(Datavise) Try and get him to
boast about all his operations, it
will distract him from the fact
that one of the landing legs on
the yacht isn't deployed.
SHARROW
(Datavise) But its standing
upright?
ALEX
(Datavise) Control moment gyros
remember!
SHARROW
(Datavise) Oh shit, of course. Oh
that's not going to end well,
despite this low gravity! (Normal)
Excuse me do you have any toilet
facilities I need to go!
PIRATE 1
Shut up, you have basic facilities
in your holding cells.
SHARROW
Cell's, why are you doing this to
us, we haven't done anything to
you? Your just a bad man mister.
KRIS
(Datavise) So plan B or C or
whatever. How long before lift
off? (Normal) So what is this
place, it looks dirty and cold?
PIRATE 1
You've probably never seen a mine
before. Its where all your rich
kid toys come from. Well now
you're going to see it first hand.
Its worked out, so don't get your
hopes up. It's empty, and there's
no where to run to, just lots of
tunnels.
ALEX
(Datavise) Gravity is very low, so
could take a while for those gyros
to spin up. They might not do
anything at. I'm going to distract
him. (Normal) So this is where
you hang out. Doesn't look very
inviting, its dirty and cold like
your soul, mister!
PIRATE 1
You spoilt brat, what would you
know about hard working people and
how we all have to live. (Putting
on a voice) Its all parties and
cocktails for you! Lah de dah!
You probably spend all you're time
playing with makeup and shopping
for clothes.
KRIS
Yes we do mister, and we love it!
My friend here just loves designer
clothes and especially shoes. She
has a very extensive collection! I
think she is obsessed. (Datavise)
If only he knew the truth! Exactly
how many shoes do you have ALEX?
ALEX
(Datavise) One pair of trainers
and my combat boots! That's it.
KRIS
(Datavise) Jeez that bad ah!
ALEX
(Datavise) No, I have two pairs of
combat boots! (Normal) Yes
Mister, I have them all colour
coded in my special closet and
you'll never see them! It's not
like this dirty dumpster place!
PIRATE 1
This is not a dumpster it has
every thing we need, fuel air and
cabins, its the perfect hiding
place. If your parents think they
can send out the space guard and
find us, good luck to them. This
rock is one of millions in the
belt.
ALEX
(In best attempt at girly voice)
Oh you horrible, horrible brute!
(Datavise) there that told him!
PIRATE 1
My god you are so vain, all of
you!
SHARROW
(Datavise) Guys, I think I can
hear the gyros spinning up. We
better keep him talking and
distracted. (Normal) Well I don't
care Mister. I also have an
extensive collection of shoes and
of course I have lots of gold
jewellery as well.
ALEX
(Normal) Yes I have lots of
Jewellery too, I like silver,
because it matches my personality!
(Datavise) It's taking way longer
than I thought, I hope they don't
crap out without blowing.
PIRATE 1
You disgust me, but your vanity
gave me an another idea! Search
all of them boys, look for any
jewellery and remove it.
SHARROW
Oh, you brute, keep you hands off
me. I'm not undoing my suit for
you!
SLAP AND PHYSICAL
MANHANDLING
KRIS
Oh, you horrible man!
HIGH PITCHED WHINE
SLOWLY INCREASING
FREQUENCY
PIRATE 2
Boss, Boss!
KRIS
Ohhhh! Keep you hands off! (KRIS
throws a surprise punch, PIRATE 1
punches back and knocks KRIS's
helmet off.
PIRATE 1
Let that be a lesson. What do you
need an helmet for anyway, we are
in a pressurised zone.
HELMET SLIDING
ACROSS FLLOR
PIRATE 2
Boss (shouted)
PIRATE 1
What?
PIRATE 2
What's that noise?
PIRATE 1
What noise...oh, (Pause) shit,
it's coming from the yacht. Oh
look at the landing leg!
PIRATE 2
What's holding it up?
PIRATE 1
I don't know. Grab that multi
prop and help hold it up.
RUNNING AND
SHOUTING OF MEN,
TIMBER BEING MOVED.
WHINING NOISE
INCREASING
ALEX
(Datavise) Guys lets just move
back, tell FROGMAN and his crew,
to get as far away from the yacht
as possible. Get your suit helmets
locked down. This is going to be
spectacular!
KRIS
(Datavise) The pirate knocked my
helmet off!
SOPHIE
(Datavise) Can anyone see KRIS's
helmet! (Normal voice) PIGLET,
PIGLET get back and get down.
Helmets on! All of you, come on!
SHARROW
(Datavise) In which direction did
he knock it KRIS?
KRIS
(Datavise) Over towards that pile
of metal, I can't see it.
SHARROW
(Datavise) I can, it's wedged
under that little bit sticking
out. Over in the corner.
KRIS
(Datavise) Oh, I see it!
ALEX
(Datavise) Its going to blow
listen to it, ohhh! I feel sorry
for those bearings! KRIS get that
helmet on now!
The gyroscope bearings give way and huge momentum is
transferred to the small yacht, which immediately tumbles
across the pirates large craft and then embeds itself in
the space dock doors depressurising the whole space dock.
SCREACHING CRASH,
GYROS SPINNING
SPACECRAFT
TUMBLING, MASSIVE
BANG, HISSING OF
GAS.
KRIS
(Datavise) Oh, I can't breath!
ALEX
(Datavise) Don't hold you breath,
you get an embolism. I'm coming.
INT. BREATHING ON NOTHING - 18 - 8
LOCATION: Pirates Asteroid Base.
Ironically the only persons with suits are the captives
except for KRIS. The pirates succumb to asphyxiation.
ALEX grabs here space suit buddy breather and seeks out
KRIS and tries to feed her oxygen. ALEX had caught a
rescue lifeboat that was flung out of the pirate ship but
not used. She hits the inflate tab, and they both get
KRIS inside and close the door just in time to save KRIS.
They are now left without a ship in suits with limited
air and KRIS in a lifeboat. Not much better than before.
KRIS
Gasping ohhh! (Datavise) I need
oxygen.
ALEX
(Suit Radio) SOPHIE pony cylinder,
now. SHARROW helmet! I have an
emergency raft. It flew out from
the pirate boat as it was sucked
out into space! KRIS get in.
HEAVY DUTY ZIPPER
SOPHIE
Pony cylinder, here.
ALEX
OK, get it on the lift raft air
attachment. Inflate you bastard.
EMERGENCY LIFE RAFT
INFLATION
ALEX
(Datavise) KRIS seal the zipper on
the inside with the glue flap. It
will help with the pressurisation.
HISSING OF AIR
KRIS
Ah, ahhh! Oh my god! That was
close!
ALEX
(Datavise) KRIS deep slow breaths,
remember space training! Panic
over! Your safe. We have your
helmet and we will carry you to a
lock and then sort things out.
SHARROW
(Suit Radio) ALEX I've found it
but the face plate is cracked. Dam
that idiot pirate. I'm glad he was
sucked out into space.
ALEX
(Suit Radio) Yep, me too. Great,
ok, look I can't undo the life
raft until we can pressurise. We
need to find a airlock and get
through it. SOPHIE can you get the
boys to carry KRIS please.
SOPHIE
(Suit Radio) FROGMAN, PIGLET over
here. MELODY, you OK?
MELODY
(Suit Radio) Yes thank, all
latched up tight.
SOPHIE
(Suit Radio) The boys are the
good?
MELODY
(Suit Radio) Yes, they are with
me. We are down the tunnel on
Left hand side, there is a big
lock about 20 meters away, we are
inside with the doors latched.
SOPHIE
(Suit Radio) Good for you. Say,
can you send the boys back up the
shaft, we need help carrying KRIS.
She is in a survival raft, but we
only have a small pony cylinder
running oxygen, its about
finished. We need to get her into
the pressurised zone.
MELODY
OK, the boys are coming!
SOPHIE
Great. See you soon!
HISS OF
PRESSURISATION
ALEX
(Datavise) KRIS breath slowly, I
think this raft might leak a bit,
because its old, but its more than
enough time. We are going to carry
you to the pressurised section.
MELODY has found a lock!
KRIS
(Datavise) OK, wow that was close!
We there yet!
ALEX
(Datavise) Not quite, but nearly
hold on.
SHARROW
(Suit Radio) ALEX where is your
utility bag?
ALEX
(Suit Radio) The bastards stole
it, sorry!
SHARROW
(Suit Radio) Dam, the one time we
really needed it.
ALEX
(Suit Radio) Yep carried it round
for ages.
SOPHIE
(Suit Radio) What?
ALEX
(Suit Radio) I had a multi band
transceiver. Could have used that
to good affect!
SHARROW
(Suit Radio) Look's like we're
going to have to live off the
land!
ALEX
(Suit Radio) Ain't that a fact!
INT. EMPTY MINE - 18 - 9
LOCATION: Pirates Asteroid Base.
KRIS and crew have with little choice but to search the
mine for anything that can help them. The survivor's find
a locker room, and in one of the lockers they find a
dodgy old suit, but they also find some gaffer tape. They
patch up the outfit with gaffer tape and get it through
to KRIS. They find an old oxygen generator one of the
lads is a technician, and he starts working on reviving
the oxygenator. Oxygen is running low. They succumb one
by one to low oxygen. The tech gets the Oxygenators
running just in time.
SOPHIE
(Suit Radio) Found another airlock
closed, about 100 meters down the
passageway, by the holding cells.
It's the Right hand side passage.
I'm going through, I might see you
on the other side if the two
pressurised sections connect!
ALEX
(Suit Radio) Roger on that. We
need to explore, but be careful,
watch for shafts and hidden drops.
Buddy up with someone. I'm sure
ZED will help you. Oh and connect
together with some rope.
SOPHIE
(Suit Radio) Ha Ha! Miss obvious
ALEX
(Suit Radio) That's if ZED's face
plate doesn't steam up on account
of being all hot and bothered at
the thought of being tied to you!
ZED
(Suit Radio) You know these radios
are all party, right? I can hear
you!
ALEX
(Suit Radio) Oh, sorry ZED, just
giving operation guidance, thats
all.
ZED
(Suit Radio) Sure!
SHARROW
(Datavise) KRIS get ready, can you
get you hands around the guys
shoulders, it would make it easier
to carry you, we've got about
hundred meters to go?
KRIS
Coughing, yep no problem. Its
getting stuffy in here, the oxygen
regeneration, not working.
ALEX
(Datavise) Typical, those bloody
idiots carrying a duff life raft.
It should be the first thing on
the maintenance list. Hold on
KRIS won't be long. (Suit Radio)
Guys get a move on KRIS is going
to get her arms around your
shoulders to make it easier! Could
two of you take her legs.
KRIS
The helmet how damaged is it?
What's holding it together?
ALEX
(Datavise) Hope mainly. SOPHIE has
found a pressure door, lets trust
there's some air the other side.
We have to assume a large part of
the mine is still pressurised, I
guess. So we are in scavenging
mode. We'll sort out the helmet
later.
AIRLOCK OPERATION
HEAVY DUTY ZIPPER
BEING UNDONE
KRIS
Oh thank goodness. Not a camping
trip I was enjoying! Guys don't
look so shocked, I'm OK!
SHARROW
KRIS you have some nasty bruises
on your face! You look like a
Panda!
KRIS
Yes, well that bastard gave me a
real beating. (Pause) But we got
him good, didn't we. He's not
having a good day now, is he?
Well, folks thanks for the ride.
Now, nothing to see here, move
along. What are you waiting for
stop lolly gagging around and lets
see what this so called pirate
base has to offer. A radio for
instance. Its might be useful?
SHARROW
Well, I didn't think you would be
so chirpy. You've been bashed and
nearly vacuumed!
KRIS
Just running on adrenaline, that's
all!
ALEX
Watch out, I think I saw movement!
In the cave back there!
KRIS
Where!
SOPHIE
Jeez guys, chill out will you,
it's ZED and myself. We went
through the other lock and there's
a cross passage. We saw a couple
of mine workshops, which might be
useful.
ZED
KRIS, oh! You OK, you look
terrible!
ALEX
Guys chill, she had a bad day OK!
But we are moving on.
SHARROW
OK lets find out what we have to
work with. Lets do a quick survey
and meet back here in twenty
minutes. We need to figure out
priorities and make a plan. Lets
spread-out take each tunnel, in
teams of two.
Be careful, its a mine right, lots
of holes. Use your suit lights.
ALEX
Yeah, no one goes alone, I can't
stress that enough. Watch out for
hidden shafts, Oh, don't worry
about the batteries, we must have
power as there are some dim lights
on.
SHARROW
Yep. So, we are looking for food,
water, oxygen and any other useful
materials. Put your inertial
trackers on, it wouldn't be good
if you got lost. Even a small
asteroid is huge in human terms.
VOICE OF AGREEMENT
THEN ECHO FOOTSTEPS
DOWN PASSAGEWAYS
INT. THE BUCKET OF BOLTS - 18 - 10
LOCATION: Pirates Asteroid Base.
They eventually find an old Pressure survival chamber and
ALEX thinks she can rig to make a crude space ship.
ALEX
KRIS get over here, look at this.
KRIS
Its an old decompression tank, why
should I be interested? Do we need
to decompress?
ALEX
Now you dolt. Look its got a
really solid pressure doors both
ends and an airlock mechanism.
Look familiar?
KRIS
Yes its a pressure lock, so what!
We have our pressure suits.
ALEX
Duh, does it remind you of say a
small space yacht?
KRIS
No its a tank with some doors!
ALEX
Yes, but what is a space ship
anyway?
KRIS
Well, it's a shit load more than a
tank with some doors.
ALEX
Yes but, we could stick on a
larger air tank. Maybe figure out
some sort of propulsion. You dig?
KRIS
It's hideous!
ALEX
Well, we are not going for looks
here, are we? It could make a
functional rescue capsule.
KRIS
ALEX You've got to be kidding me,
you still got 'dumb' circulating
in your system? Its an old tank.
ALEX
Well the dumb has been washed away
with my normal excess of 'smart'
thank you. Look, think about it?
We rig up some sort of thrusters,
just cold gas, perhaps, using some
breather tanks, perhaps even a
water tank with a steam generator.
KRIS
Jesus, that takes some
imagination.
ALEX
Well I don't think we can't stay
here, or we will die here. That
pirate dick brain was right about
one thing, there are millions of
rocks in the belt. DOILY and crew
are good, but they will never find
us unless we get above the plain
of the orbits. We'll only have a
very weak signal if we stay here
all the other asteroids will block
the signal. If I know DOILY she
will be travelling just above the
plain of the common orbit, so we
poke our heads up and be seen, OK!
KRIS
Well, I have to agree with your
logic. But in this thing!
ALEX
Well, unless we find a functional
ship, and I think we flushed those
out the broken lock doors, we are
screwed.
KRIS
OK, OK, so lets take a look then!
God I hate it when you are right,
this is very annoying!
ALEX
That's just what SHAS says. It's
one of my good features!
KRIS
Yes well, lets not dwell on that
shall we! I suppose its something
to work on. That's very important
for moral. (Bleep) OH, we need to
head back. Lets get the ace team
together and start escape plan A.
ALEX
You sure it's not plan B.
KRIS
Oh, my God we are doomed!
INT. TEAM SPIRIT - 18 - 10.1
LOCATION: Pirates Asteroid Base.
They start to search the mine for the materials required
to covert the pressure vessel into a space vessel. ALEX
tasks ZED with finding a method to detach the proposed
space craft from its rocky embrace. PIGLET suggests they
blast it free.
KRIS
So lets see, SHAS you found what
looks like an old oxygen
generator. That's one tick off our
long list, now we will need
something to absorb Carbon
Dioxide, any idea's?
ZED
Oh, yes, I think so. There were
some old canisters in a cupboard
in one of the workshops. I think
they said lithium something on the
side, there probably regeneration
packs.
KRIS
Great, ZED check them out. Any
one found any water, yet?
SOPHIE
I found a cold store with ration
packs, and there was a lot of old
ice from condensate. I could
scrape that off and then boil it
to sterilise, we still have power
after all.
SHARROW
Good idea SOPHIE. Yes that's two
pieces of good news today!
KRIS
Great so Oxygen, Water and CO2,
Oh, and the food as well. Now
ALEX has some very exciting news
which we want to tell you!
ALEX
I do?
KRIS
Yes you do. Don't you! The ship
you idiot, tell them about the
ship.
ALEX
Yes the ship!
SHARROW
Don't tell me you found an
undamaged spacecraft?
ALEX
Well, not exactly SHAS no. Now
don't get too excited! Also don't
say I'm crazy before you think
right?
SHARROW
Oh, I'm not liking this!
SOPHIE
Look ALEX, we know you're just
plain crazy anyway, so don't worry
about that! The only one around
here that has crazier idea's is
ZED.
ZED
Hay!
SOPHIE
Oh, Sorry ZED, I mean good crazy!
ZED
Thanks SOPHIE!
ALEX
Well, so near one of the outer
walls I found a solid pressure
vessel undamaged with working
mechanical airlock doors. Its for
decompression training. Leads
through the wall to the outside. I
think if we kit it out, stick on
some sort of propulsion system we
have what could be our way out of
here.
SHARROW
What, you want to fly an old
Airlock out of here.
ALEX
Yes.
SHARROW
But its just an airlock.
ALEX
Exactly.
SHARROW
But, but. Oh this is so wrong on
so many levels.
ALEX
No wait, think about it. What is a
space craft other than a tank with
some doors. Right.
SHARROW
Yes, but what about the other
stuff, like propulsion, life
support, control, navigation.
ALEX
Yes, but they are just small
additions.
SHARROW
ALEX do you have any idea how
complex they are?
SOPHIE
Well, not really. I mean,
propulsion just chucks stuff out
the back anyway, it could be
anything.
SHARROW
Yes but what do we use as fuel.
SOPHIE
Well, I don't know. Could be
compressed air, or water,
anything, anything we have lots of
really.
ALEX
That's the spirit SOPHIE!
ZED
Yes, but its nuts, you mean we
concoct a space ship from all this
old junk. How do we detach it from
the rock walls its cemented into
to?
KRIS
I told you they wouldn't like it!
ALEX
Thanks KRIS. Yes, yes look I know
all this stuff, but we just work
the problem, OK. Its loosely
positioned. If we weaken the rock
around the edges mine air pressure
will eject it.
SOPHIE
It's going to take ages to chisel
around the rock wall. (Pause)
Hello ZED! Even with the big
tough guys its going to take
forever! What happens if it blows
by mistake?
ALEX
Minor details SOPHIE, minor
details! PIGLET your a chemistry
genius. Could we rig some
explosives and blow our way out.
PIGLET
Well, its possible. We would need
to find some active ingredients.
It is a mine, they always leave
blast caps around, I'm sure I can
rig something.
ALEX
See, working the problem, one
issue at a time.
SHARROW
Shit, well, there are a lot of
things which need to line up and
go right ALEX.
ALEX
Yes, I know that. Look, everyone
its a crazy plan, but do any of
you have a better idea?
ZED
Well, why don't we hunker down
here and just wait for rescue?
ALEX
Yes I thought of that. SHARROW why
don't you answer that one.
SHARROW
Well ZED your idea sounds like the
best. However when you dig into
the details its not so great.
Firstly, how many rocks are there
in the belt. We are hidden on one
of millions. Stuck inside with
few distinguishing features apart
from small holes where the lock
doors used to be. Its dark and
cold. No sighs at all that we
were here, apart from a small
amount of debris from the
explosion. Bodies and spacecraft
will be rapidly dissipating into
the void. DOILY and the RCBS could
search forever and never find us.
I have to reluctantly conclude
that ALEX's plan is a little 'way
out' but its makes sense. It also
gives us something to do, rather
than waiting for eventual death in
this horrible place.
SOPHIE
Absolutely SHAS. Well, I'm all
in. You get my vote!
ALEX
I like your attitude SOPHIE!
ZED
Yeah count me in too. I was
thinking, that there is an
electrical workshop. If their is
some wire I could perhaps build
some sort of spark gap
transmitter. Tesla style.
SOPHIE
There you go ZED, your so clever
with the electrical side of
things.
ZED
Thanks Sophie. (Blushing)
PIGLET
Look, I'm fairly confident I can
blow that rock wall. I have
(cough) some youthful experience
with detonations. If someone can
find a rock drill, which in a mine
shouldn't be impossible. I can
'free the tank ship'
ALEX
Good for you Piglet!
KRIS
I agree as well, its better than
sitting here doing nothing!
SHARROW
Well lets get started then and not
waste oxygen.
They party splits up with murmuring as idea's get
discussed. The mood has lifted as people now have a
purpose.
SHARROW
Say ALEX, I think we should get
out into what remains of the vac
bay and check out the remains of
any ships. Look for salvage, or
anything we can find.
ALEX
Good idea SHAS. One thing that is
bothering me is what are we going
to do for navigation. You know
how impossible manual manoeuvring
is in space, everything is so
counter intuitive.
SHARROW
Yeah, I've been worrying about
that too. Let see if we can dig
up anything from what's left of
poor old 'Vision within a Dream'
ALEX
OK, but you're not going alone. I
will buddy you. ZED and SOPHIE
before you shoot off, we were
wondering about nav. You got any
brilliant idea's.
ZED
Well, its tricky for one thing. We
need to control our pitch, roll
and yaw.
SHARROW
Come on you two technical genius's
can do it. I have faith.
ZED
Well I suppose I do have my suit
based computation stack. It's
thousands of times more powerful
than the computers that got man to
the moon. The big issue is we have
no inertial control. Oh and also
no control gyroscopes.
SOPHIE
Say ZED, did you say you saw some
old electric motors in one of the
workshops. Perhaps if we mounted
them on some sort of gimbal and
stuck on some flywheels? Wouldn't
that give a crude inertial setup!
ZED
Yes, yes it would SOPHIE. Your so
smart!
SOPHIE
Well so are you ZED!
ZED
Thanks SOPHIE
ALEX
Well, OK then KIDs. So when you
have quite finished the mutual
admiration society, could we get
going please? KRIS could you make
a start on the 'tank ship' until I
get back from buddying SHAS? We
won't be long, we are going to see
what we can reclaim from the
horrible mess in the dock.
KRIS
Of course. Go, go stop dawdling.
ZED where did you see that
laser/cutter?
INT. GARBAGE HUNT - 18 - 10.2
LOCATION: Pirates Asteroid Base - Ship Hanger
SHARROW and ALEX explore the wreckage of the space ships
that are left in the hanger including the remains of
KRIS's space yacht. SHARROW cuts her spacesuit gloves and
has a minor panic but ALEX is their to patch them up.
They continue the search and find useful supplies to
provision there new spaceship.
All dialog is on suit radio.
SPACESUIT BREATHING
AND RADIOS
SHARROW
Oh look at it, poor thing, it's so
mangled, so sad. How are we going
to get in?
ALEX
Well, however we do it, take your
time. Don't get the suit snagged
on any sharp edges.
SHARROW
I think the stowage locker room
was on the left hand side opposite
the kitchen.
ALEX
Well, its all so torn and mangled,
add to that explosive
decompression. We could find
items all over the place.
SHARROW
It might be through this door
here. Ahhh! (Sound of straining)
Bugger its twisted and jammed!
ALEX
Watch your gloves. Look I'm going
to find the oldest tool in the
tool kit.
SHARROW
What's that.
ALEX
A crow bar, something to do
serious damage.
TEARING AND
STRAINING OF METAL
SHARROW
A little bit of the old ALEX
subtlety I see?
ALEX
Yep, that's about it!
SHARROW
Oh look, I think it's working, you
and your sophisticated ways!
METALLIC KNOCKING
GRUNTS, HAMMER
BLOWS
SHARROW
Oh bugger! ALEX I have a tear in
my glove.
ALEX
How did you do that?
SHARROW
Oh, stumbled and grabbed hold of
this frame, its like a razor!
HISSING OF GAS
ALEX
Told, you, to be careful!
SHARROW
ALEX its leaking, the pressure is
dropping fast!
ALEX
Don't panic, remember don't hyper
ventilate, breath steady and slow
and pop your ears. I have some
space gaffa, in my utility pouch.
We used it all the time in the
corps. I always said that we won
battles because of it!
SHARROW
ALEX, get on with it! I'm feeling
faint.
ALEX
Calm down, miss panic stations.
It's sealed, just let the backpack
stabilise the pressure!
HISSING
SHARROW
Oh, thank you. I've got to say
ALEX I'm worried about our general
situation. We've been in some
scrapes, but this tank thing is a
real long shot!
Do you think it's going to work or
are you putting on a brave face
for the troops?
ALEX
Look, it will work, if we make it
work. Right. Now look at me, you
always over think things. We have
a good chance if we don't panic
and bug out. You know that by now
the RCBS and DOILY will be
searching, RUDI and BOY will be
strategising, whilst GANDER is
pacing and saying 'Trackamina' all
the time. They have five ships
and this is their home patch.
Well almost. I'm sure GANDER will
have bribed someone in TRACON for
our last known radar signature.
All we have to do is pop our head
up and squawk loud enough. They
come running.
SHARROW
Your not worried at all?
ALEX
Never! Well, yes, but its a good
worry!
SHARROW
How do you think that SOPHIE and
MELODY and the others, will cope.
Will they be OK?
ALEX
They'll probably be coping better
than you and me. Remember they
were born here, in the belt.
Survival is a strong instinct
coached in from birth. SOPHIE's
much tougher than you, prettier
too.
SHARROW
Hay, what about experience.
ALEX
No, not a match, I'm afraid!
SHARROW
It would be just be my luck to
finally meet someone, then loose
them almost straight away.
ALEX
Oh, my God, you're not going to
loose her.
Relax, you'll be baking and
quilting before you know it!
SHARROW
Quilting?
ALEX
Well, you know what I mean.
SHARROW
Yes I do. Thanks ALEX. (Pause)
Say are we really totally boring
over the cooking thing?
ALEX
Yes! But don't worry, its kind of
nice really. Sort of homely.
Reminds me of what I'm missing!
SHARROW
Oh, you make me sound so settled.
Oh I'm sorry, I didn't think.
ALEX
It's OK SHARROW. I love you and,
it's really nice to see you happy.
I am kind of processing the MARIE
situation. What else can I do?
SHARROW
What a pair of spades, hah!
ALEX
Yep, two regular oldies for sure
now. Look, if anything happens
SHARROW, I'll look out for SOPHIE,
don't worry. Mind you she will
probably look out for me! (Pause)
OK come on lets stop this sad
introspection and do what we came
here to do! Hang on! Let me just
check that glove Ok, seems to be
holding well. I think the glue has
set. What's the pressure gauge
showing?
SHARROW
Well I have about a third of my
air, so that's not brilliant.
ALEX
No it's not. This means we need
to get our skates on.
SHARROW
OK (Pause) Oh look one of the
hinges has broken open.
Must have succumbed to charms of
the ALEX technique! I'm going to
take a look. Wow! Totally worth
the effort. Look at this
collection of goodies. That will
cheer up the troops!
ALEX
Chocolate bars, great!