In episode 267 of the L3 Leadership Podcast, Doug Smith shares how to deal with stress, burnout, and anxiety in leadership.
10 KEY TAKE-AWAYS FROM EPISODE 267:
Doug shares about his personal journey through burnout, stress, and anxiety, and what proved to be the most difficult season of his life.
Doug shares wisdom and insight in the areas of burnout, unprocessed grief, and spiritual battles.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THE EPISODE 267:
In episode 267 of the L3 Leadership Podcast, Doug Smith shares how to deal with stress, burnout, and anxiety in leadership.
10 KEY TAKE-AWAYS FROM EPISODE 267:
Doug shares about his personal journey through burnout, stress, and anxiety, and what proved to be the most difficult season of his life.
Doug shares wisdom and insight in the areas of burnout, unprocessed grief, and spiritual battles.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THE EPISODE 267:
[inaudible]
Speaker 2:Hey, podcast, family, and welcome to episode number 267 of the L three leadership podcast, where we are obsessed with helping you grow to your maximum potential and to maximize the impact of your leadership. My name is Doug Smith and I am your host. And today's episode is brought to you by my friends at Henny jewelers. They are our jeweler of choice, and you can learn more about them@hennyjewelers.com. Well, in today's episode, you may have noticed that we haven't actually aired in a new podcast episode in a while. And that's because I've been going through a very difficult season in my life. And I'm going to actually just share about what I'm learning, uh, walking through this season in my life. And, and even though it's been one of the hardest seasons of my life in the midst of it, I have found that God is doing a significantly deep work in my heart and in my soul. And I can just tell you this. I am learning a ton about anxiety, panic, the brain stress, burnout, rest recovery, and spiritual warfare. And I'm going to be sharing what I'm learning with you and today's episode. And so wherever you find yourself, as you listen to this on your leadership journey or in your life journey, I believe this will be a lesson that will help you significantly. But before we dive into the lesson, just a few announcements, Hey, 2020 is coming to a close. And I know many of you are very grateful for that, but as you were starting to think about 2021, you're going to start thinking about your goals, how you can grow, how you can make an impact. And I really want to challenge you. One of the greatest ways that you can make an impact is by leading and developing other leaders. And we actually have a way for you to do that here at L three leadership. One way that you can grow significantly is to become an L three mastermind group facilitator. We have mastermind groups that meet two every two weeks for an entire year, and our facilitators pour into that group and they lead and help develop that group. Now I've been a part of a mastermind group and leading mastermind groups for six years now. And it has been the single greatest source of growth in my life. And so if you've never been in a mastermind group, or if you've thought about leading a mastermind group, but don't know how to, here's the great news. We take care of everything for you. We will train you. We will give you everything you need. And in fact, we'll even compensate you for being an L three mastermind facilitator. So if you'd be interested in leading leaders and making a difference in 2021, you can just simply go to L three leadership.org forward slash lead, and you can sign up and we will be in contact with you on taking a next step with us. So don't let 2021 go by without pouring into leaders. And one of the greatest ways you can do that is to lead a mastermind group. I also want to thank our sponsors, bare tongue advisors, the financial advisors at bear tongue advisors, help educate and empower clients to make informed financial decisions. Find out how bear tongue advisors can help you develop a customized financial plan for your financial future. Please visit their website@beartongueadvisors.com. That's B E R a T U N G advisors.com, securities and investment products and services offered through Waddell and Reed, Inc member FINRA, and SIPC bear tongue advisers, Waddell and Reed in L three leadership are separate entities. And with all that being said, let's dive right into the lesson. Enjoy, Hey, today. I'd like to talk to you on the subject, dealing with it's burnout, anxiety, grief, and stress as a leader. And you can take out leader in that sentence and just put human beings, uh, because the reality is we all deal with these things. And in 2020, I'm willing to bet there's not a person on the planet that didn't experience at least one, if not all of those things. And so, um, you know, wherever you are in your journey, I prejudice. This will be a message that encourages you. It gives you hope and also gives you practical tools to help navigate through some of these things. I'm just simply going to be sharing my journey and dealing with these things and what I'm learning. And I hope that it will add value to you. Um, I would encourage you to also go back and listen to episode number 264. I recorded a lesson on how to deal with anxiety as a leader, and this is really part two of that lesson. So I really encourage you to listen to both, but let me just catch you up on my journey, uh, with, with, with these things. Uh, and August of 2020, I started experiencing panic and anxiety attacks, and that kind of led into this, this very difficult season that I've been in for about four months. And, um, and I recorded the anxiety lesson in September, and then in October I actually got worse. Um, yeah, and I'm sharing this and I share my journey because I think it's important for, for people and leaders to realize that if you're going through something like this, you're not the only the one going through it. You know, I actually, there's multiple people, you know, that come to mind. Uh, Brian Johnson, I mentioned in the podcast, he's the pastor of Bethel church. He went through the exact same experience as I was listening to messages around anxiety. And then people's journey. Louie Giglio went through a season where he couldn't get off the couch for three months. And, um, and you know, I think there's a point that we shared the, the trials that we go through. And especially when God brings us out on the other side, because it makes people realize that they're not alone and they're not the only ones going through this. And that was a, a source of great hope for me when I was going through things. And so I mentioned in October things that got worse and there was actually a week could not function, uh, in October it was, it was pretty scary. And, you know, in the past couple of months, I've had to cut a lot of things out. And one of those things included podcasting for a while. I had to say no to a lot of interviews that I had scheduled that I was looking forward to, but the most important thing is I had to learn that this is a season where I have to focus on me getting back to my mental health, my physical health, my emotional health, my spiritual health to that is absolutely vital because if those things aren't in order, I can't do anything else, but I want you to know how serious this was. There was a, my question for an entire month to people in friends that I was with. Am I going to be okay? Am I going to make it the rally was, I wasn't sure it was a scary place to be. And I can tell you that, uh, you know, since October, we're now in December, uh, I've had about eight, eight really good weeks heading in the right direction. And I'll be sharing a little bit about, you know, how I'm doing those things and, uh, what I've been doing over those eight weeks to help me, uh, in this episode. But I just wanted to let you know, that's where I've been. And if you're in a scary place, it's okay, you're not alone. And there is hope for you and there is help for you. And so, uh, let me just share a little bit about what I've learned in this journey the past four months. Uh, the first thing I just want to talk to you about is, is asking the question why, why, you know, when I started experiencing these naturally as a problem solver, and as a leader, I want to fix it and I want to fix it as soon as possible. And so how do you fix an issue? You try to figure out the root of the issue. And as I looked at the issues in my life, several things came up that I'll share about one is burnout. There's a book that I read that was fantastic called leading on empty by Wayne Cordeiro. I think that's how you say his last name leading on empty. I can't recommend it enough. And when I read it, I realized very, very quickly that I had burned out and that if I am going to get back into where I was or get into an even better place that I really need to focus on getting myself healthy and resting and recovering, and I'll share a little bit about what those things are. But, uh, when it comes to burnout, you know, here's some things that people said to me, they were extremely helpful. One was reading that book leading on empty to is item, mentor, meet in my life. And he basically looked at me. He said, Doug, your body is speaking to you and you don't realize this or not. I know it's painful. And I know it's difficult to go through what you're going through, but what your body is saying to you is actually saving your life. It's saving your life, your body speaking to you and saying, what you're doing now is not sustainable. And that's the reality that I had to come to grips with in my life. I was burning out. I had burned out and I was meeting with my therapist and yes, I've been going to therapy and it's been absolutely wonderful. And I just said, Hey, talk to me about burnout. What have you learned about burnout? And he said, Doug, you know, burnout in my experience, when I work with people, it's not so much a capacity issue. Usually people have a ton of capacity. It's usually unrealistic expectations that you have for yourself internally. I'll say that again. Cause that was huge burnout. Isn't always necessarily a capacity issue. It can also be unrealistic expectations you have for yourself internally. And for me, that was absolutely a huge cause of why I believe I burned out. I put so much such heavy expectations on myself. It's ridiculous. And I've had to learn to let that go in the past couple of months and I'm still learning to let that go. Um, but unrealistic expectations and pressure that you put on yourself can lead to burnout. And then lastly, when it comes to burnout, I didn't have rhythms of rest in my life. I just went all the time. Go, go, go, go, go. Uh, so burnout was one of the big reasons why I believe, um, I entered into the season two is unprocessed grief, unprocessed grief. And, um, I was meeting with a mentor and he basically looked at me and he had known my life. And you know, you may not have context for my whole life story, but he said to me, he said, Doug, you know, you basically watched your mom die as a teenager over the course of seven years. And you medicated that with drugs and then you got saved, which was awesome. But then you started medicating your pain through performance. And so you've spent the last 17 years building walls around yourself of a performance to avoid feeling pain and allowing yourself to grieve. And I realized for the first time in my life, I don't even know if I had really grieved my mom. I didn't know if I grieved my mother-in-law. I didn't know if I grieved my sister's death and that really, really hit home for me. And, uh, Keith Anderson has this quote. He said this, he said, most people don't expect the amount of loss, grief that surfaces, when you are finally quiet. And you know, this year prior to all this happening, I had finally gotten to a quiet place in my soul. And I feel like it allowed me to come to this place where I can deal with grief. But, um, there was a lot of grief that I never dealt with. And so unprocessed grief I had to deal with. And I believe it led to the season that I'm in. It was one of the reasons why, and I love what my therapist said to me about grief. He said, Doug, you, you can't say goodbye to something you've never said hello to. And you know, in my mind I said goodbye to grief a bunch of times, but the reality is I never even said hello to grief. And so I had to learn how to grieve in this past four months. And I'll share about that in a second. And the last reason is I've reflected on the why of the season is I believe I'm in a spiritual battle. I believe in spiritual warfare. And the reality is, and clearly I'm speaking as a person of faith, the Bible was very clear that we have an enemy who desires to destroy our lives and make sure we never fulfill the plan of God in our lives. Uh, in the Bible in Luke 2231, Jesus said this to Peter. He said, Satan has asked to sift all of you as wheat. And first Peter five eight, it says, be alert and of sober mind, your enemy, the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour and John 10, 10, it says the thief comes only to steal, kill, and destroy. And I have come that they may have life and have it to the full it's very, very clear that the enemy wants to destroy our lives. And so we will have special spiritual warfare in our lives, but the reality is in Christ, we always have victory. We always have victory, but, but when thinking about why you have to realize that there's going to be spiritual battles in your life. And I love this. I was listening to a sermon by Keith Moore and he said this and administered to me so much. He said, the reason some battle seems so tough is because you can't see it in the spiritual, but the enemy is doing his best to squash an acorn before it becomes a mighty Oak tree. I love that he's doing his best to squash and acorn before it becomes a muddy Oak tree. And the reality is a lot of times when a spiritual battle comes in our lives, it means we're getting ready to go to another level, a deeper level with God, a deeper place in our calling. So just realize that in life, you're going to have spiritual battles and there's going to be spiritual warfare and your life, but know that in Christ you always have the victory. And the last thing I would tell you, when it comes to the wise, I've read this quote by J I packer. And I love this. He said, if you ask, why is this happening? No light may come, but if you ask how might a glorify God, now there will always be an answer. And I love that. And the reality is, you know, I've mentioned some things of why I think I'm in the season that I'm in, in the natural and even in the spiritual. But the reality is I may never know why I'm going through something, but I can always ask how my, to glorify God. And do you know, one way I can glorify God is by recording this podcast and sharing my story again, I can't tell you how encouraging was the Louie Giglio, Brian Johnson, Wayne Cordeiro, uh, all shared their stories of how they went through very similar or things. It made me realize that I'm not alone. I had a mentor. Tell me, Doug, I don't know a leader that I'm friends with, who hasn't gone through, what you're going through. And the reality is we're the Bible says we're all going through the same tests and trials and we are not alone. And you are not the only one going through something, but always look for a way to glorify God in the midst of what's happening. Even if you don't know why always look for ways. Cause there's always a way to glorify God and what you're going through. I want to spend the rest of this lesson, just sharing with you some practical things that have helped me over the past four months. And I hope that they'll help you as well. And the first area that I would talk to you about is my walk with God. This has been my number one priority over the last four months. And, uh, this has been huge. I can't tell you how grateful I am for the deep work that God is doing in me in this season and the midst of everything that I'm experiencing. I'm so grateful for Todd and I don't know how people do life or go through trials without him. I really don't. Um, but I've spent more time in the Bible and more time in prayer, getting quiet and worship, et cetera than I ever have before during the season. And it's, it's been life transforming for me. And so more than anything, I just want to encourage you. If you're a person of faith, go all in with God in the seasons. And sometimes it takes a difficult season to, to make us realize that God wasn't our first priority when he, he should be. And I know that was the case for me. And so God is back in his rightful place in my life. And uh, and I'm very grateful for that and the work that he's doing. So put God first, no matter what season you're going through. The second thing I'd encourage you to do is continue to get professional help. I've mentioned this before, but I've been going to therapy and it's been one of the most beneficial things I've ever done. Um, and just some things that have helped me in therapy that I thought I'd share with you. As one, I had to do a trauma assessment and make a journal of every traumatic experience that I've had in my life. And I was absolutely shocked at how many traumatic experiences I have had and how they were impacting my beliefs and how I lived my life. And it was some deep, deep work. Um, I've continued to journal. You guys know how big I am on journaling, but I journal everything. Um, and especially things I'm grateful for and seasons like this as huge. Um, I also had to do an assessment and an evaluation of my beliefs and one of the core value, one of the core beliefs that I have, um, that causes me anxiety is that I'm not enough. Right? And I constantly try to prove that I'm enough. And I did this assessment when you basically just make two to, um, two less than the first list is what evidence do you have? That you're not enough. And when I actually had to process that I had like zero, right? And then it's like, well, what evidence do you have that you are enough and get real specific? And then all of a sudden I made this huge lesson. It's just funny. You know, I had substantial evidence that I'm enough. And yet this coordinate of beliefs that can dominate my life is that I'm not enough, but when you actually sit and journal that it is such deep work. And that was a huge, huge, um, revelation to me to do that. And now I have a tool that I can use anytime that I'm experiencing a, a coordinative belief. Uh, another thing that was helpful in therapy was having a safety plan. And again, I said that, um, I mean, I had a really difficult time in October. And so I actually, and I don't have it in front of me, but it's a list of what I do when I'm in trouble. So if I'm having a hard time with anxiety away, I think was a 10 step, listen, it starts off with, Hey, I'm just going to spend time with God. I'm going to turn on worship. Music's number three is I'm going to pray for as I'll listen to a sermon. Five is I'll talk to Laura. Six is I'll phone, a friend, our mentor, uh, you know, seven is I'll call my therapist and then eight, nine and 10 are, if you're in serious trouble, you could call, you know, in Allegheny County here in Pittsburgh, there's a resolve hotline where you can call and talk to someone and you can go to the hospital, et cetera. And so just having a safety plan for, if you get into difficult waters, uh, is absolutely huge. And I'd encourage you to make one, if you don't. And then lastly, just sharing, uh, what you're learning in therapy and sharing what you're going through. Again, you'll be shocked at how many people are going through the same thing that you are and that you're not alone. And you'll really develop a community of people going through the same thing that you can go with these, uh, go through this journey with them instead of going through it alone. And so, uh, continue to get professional help therapy is awesome. If you've never done it, sign up. It's awesome. The third thing that I would encourage you to do is invest in deep friendships. And when I was at the peak of going through a difficult time in October, I'd called my best friends. And I just said, can we just go for walks and talk? And, um, and so I went on many, many walks, which are so refreshing and two of my friends and men, both mentors as well, they both called me out and they said, Doug, you've been neglecting deep friendships in your life for a long time. You've been neglecting deep friendships in your life for a long time. And the reality is I've, you know, quote unquote, thousands of friends out there, but I very few deep friendships. And they said, you need to really invest in those, you know, three to five deep friendships in your life. And you need to call those people every week and connect with them every week and, um, and just invest in deep friendships. And so that's a commitment I'm making from this day forward is that I'm going to invest in those deep friendships for the rest of my life. And so if you've been neglecting deep friendships stop, um, don't wait till you're in a time of need to reach out and try to develop those develop deep friendships and, and give your lives to those three to five people. It'll change your life. The fourth thing I'm learning about and that I would encourage you to do is to develop rhythms of rest and your life rhythms of rest. You know, for years, I prided myself on only getting six hours of sleep a night and waking up at 4:00 AM and being so productive. Um, but I didn't realize how important rest was until I burn out and needed to rest and was basically forced to rest. And so for me, what rhythms of rest look like in my life, um, I'm going to let myself, at least in this season sleep, as long as I can. That's usually between seven and nine hours a night, and it's been so refreshing to get eight or nine hours of sleep a night. And then each year, these are the rhythms I aspire to. I don't know if I'll hit them, but this is what I'm going to try to do. I'm going to try to do a two week vacation every year where I get away for two weeks and just totally unplug. I'm going to try to do one staycation once a year. And this was interesting during the season, I actually took a week off of work and just stayed home and didn't work. And the girls were in daycare and, um, it was so refreshing and I realized that so many times, even when I'm on vacation, I'm not fully resting because I want to go do something or see something, et cetera. And so I'm just going to stay home once a year and do nothing and just drink deeply from deep friendships and just be, uh, we implemented this earlier this year, but we're going to have a weekly Sabbath a day where we rest and don't do anything. Um, I want to do quarterly family getaways on three-day weekends with my family and quarterly overnights with my wife, Laura. And so, uh, those are the rhythms of rest that I want to implement in 2021 in my life. I would encourage you to make a list of your own rhythms of rest. The next area that I continue to learn about, and I encourage you to is grieving. And I talked about this a little bit earlier, but I realized that I thought I had grieved, but I really had a lot of unprocessed grief in my life. And so, um, for me, uh, something that I did, it was very impactful in this area is I actually went to the grave sites of each of my lost, loved ones. And I wrote letters to them, uh, by their grave site. And, um, I can't get into it that much other than just saying that God used that time in a very significant way. And I feel like it allowed me to, to grieve the deaths of those I lost. And so, um, I just wanna encourage you to study the subject of grieving. If you have a lot of light loss in your life, let yourself go there, let yourself feel the pain, let yourself feel the loss, getting a support groups to help you process grief and, uh, just get support around you. But that exercise of going to the grave sites and writing letters to my lost loved ones was, was, um, was really beneficial and something I'd encourage you to do. The next thing I'd like to talk to you about is pruning. And as I sat down with one of the mentors that I was meeting with, uh, throughout this period of my life, um, they basically encouraged me. They said, Doug, you need to spend time in John chapter 15. And it talks all about branches that need either pruned or cut. And they said, Doug, I think you've built a lot of branches in your life. And some of those branches need cut in some of those branches need pruned. And he said, the hard part for you is all the branches, you boat around yourself to medicate yourself from experiencing pain or good and noble things. You know, you don't have any unhealthy addictions or anything like that in your life. So it's going to be very difficult for you to discern what needs pruned in what needs cut, but spend time with God and he'll reveal that to you. And so that's something I'm currently in the midst of doing, and I'm literally throwing everything on the table. So God, is there anything in my life that needs prune? Is there anything that needs cut and please make that abundantly clear to me. And one of the most helpful pieces of advice that I got in this time was that I don't need to make a hasty decision in this. I don't need to make a hasty decision to prune this or cut that. Um, I really need to spend time and just hear from God. I will share with you two things I have cut or did cut at, uh, at some point throughout the season. And one was social media. I got off social media for an entire month. And let me just tell you, I did not miss it at all. And, uh, and it was huge and it was awesome to be off for a month. So that was something I pruned and then believe it or not, for those of you know, me, I prune coffee. So that is crazy. As a, as of the recording of this podcast, I'm probably, uh, three or four months into no coffee and I've just been drinking green tea. I'm actually drinking some right now. And I never thought I'd prune or cut coffee in my life. Maybe it'll come back one day. I do miss it. But, um, but that was significant for me as well. So pruning, but maybe you need to take some time in your life and just process with God. Hey, what am I? Life needs cut in. One of my life needs pruned. The next thing that I'm learning a lot about is just learning and knowing that I'm enough learning and knowing that I'm enough. Again, my toxic thought always in my core beliefs is that I'm not enough. And so I constantly am trying to prove that I am enough and that is not healthy at all. And just some things that, that have been encouraging to me in this season when it comes to knowing that I'm enough of his one, they're very same mentor. I've been talking about that I met with, he said, Doug, I've never seen someone in my entire life with more favor than you have with people. Uh, everywhere you go, people love you everywhere you go. But you keep trying to earn what God has freely given to you. Stop trying to earn what God freely gave you. People don't love you because of what you do for them. People don't love you for anything you've done. They love you for who you are and just freely accept that gift that God gave you. And that was huge for me. It was huge. It was like, people just love me for me. And, and that's why I'm enough. I'm not enough because I produce this or do that or met with this. Like, no, I am just enough. Something else, just a fun story. And this will hopefully be a title in a chapter, in a book one day. But I was randomly talking to my dad and I don't even know how this came up, to be honest with you, but I was telling him what I was going through. And I didn't mention anything about not being enough, but he said, he said, Doug people always come up to me and they say, Doug or John, you know, you must be really proud of your son with everything he's doing. And my dad just, he said, I always looked back at them and just say, I'd be proud of him. If he was cleaning toilets. And he looked at me, he said, Doug, I don't give a sh S H I T, what your job title is. And, uh, and man, that was so awesome. And you know, um, my dad, hasn't very often told me that he is proud of me in my lifetime, but, but that statement just helps so much just saying that my dad loves me for me. And he's proud of me no matter what I do. And again, I am enough. And so are you, if you're listening to this and, um, my mentor went on to say, he said, all you need to do. Doug is simply look at the gifts in the way that God created you and say, God, this is how you created me. I wonder how you're going to use my gifts. I wonder how you're going to use me in my lifetime based on who you made me to be, because I didn't create me. God created me and God put everything in me that I need. And so what is he going to do with that? And so my question for you is what toxic lies and belief systems are you believing that are limiting you and holding you back, and you need to identify those and deal with them and share them with people and have people speak truth into your life. I'm so grateful for those men. Now I'm speaking truth into my life. And it certainly helped me on this path to knowing that I'm enough. And so whether you're like me and your lies, I'm not enough. Or you don't know what it is. Take some time, figure out what your toxic beliefs are and then figure out ways to destroy them. So just a few more thoughts before we wrap up, the next thought would be this, that taking medication is okay. Taking medication is okay. And I know this can be controversial, especially in faith circles, but, but I would tell you this, that prior to this experience, I would have been opposed probably to taking medication, but I had reached such a low point that I was willing to do anything that it required to get help. And as I met with mentors, as I met with friends, first and foremost, I was shocked at how many people were going through the exact same battle or had gone through the exact same battle that I'm going through now, which was so encouraging and comforting. And then to learn that many of them had been on medication for a season or are still on medication to help them, uh, was very, very helpful. And so I started being open and as I worked with a professional, I was encouraged to get on medication and I did get on a low dose medication. It's a medication that's not addictive, uh, which was important to me. And again, I'm not a doctor, so I would encourage you to seek professional help, but I just wanted to encourage you and letting you know that I'm on medication. And, and again, it's not what I want. It's not ideal, but it's what I need for now. And I'm hoping that it will just be a season and then I can wean my way off of it. That is my plan. Um, but I just want to let you know, it's okay to take medication if that's what you need to get by in this season, but do it through professional help. And don't take medicine if you haven't been recommended that from a professional. So, um, that's what I'm going to say when it comes to taking medication. And, uh, the next thing would just be things that I'm implementing, um, through this season that have helped me. That'll probably change my life forever. Some I had done, but I'm kind of shifting the way I did. It is one I'm daily unplugging, I'm daily unplugging. And one of my favorite quotes when it comes to unplugging was from Rick Warren. And he said, as leaders, we, you need to divert daily. So every day you need to, to just unplug. And he said, if you work with your mind all day, you need to do something with your hands, like cook or garden. If you work with your hands all day, you need to do something with your mind, like read a book, et cetera. So divert daily. And then he said, withdraw weekly. And this is all about sabotaging. So every week you need a day off where you do nothing and don't think about work and then abandon annually. And so every, every year you get away on a vacation and just get away. And so I talked a little bit about rhythms of rest earlier. So I won't go into that. But daily unplugging for me, that just means when I get home from work, until my girls go to bed, I am with my girls and then I'm with Laura and then I'm basically hitting the hay. And so that's my daily unplugging exercising daily, everywhere. I went through this season and every expertise, every professional that I sought out, basically as just said, exercise daily, it's huge. I get a hobby. This is something that I've heard in theory, but never actually practiced. And so I'm trying to find a hobby. Um, I'm trying to learn how to fish. I'm trying to learn to just go for walks. I don't know what my hobbies going to be, but I am determined in 2021 to find a hobby that I love and a hobby is something that I can't keep track of and can't get credit for. So we'll see what that is. I'll keep you posted, um, eating healthy. Um, this is something I've been focused on for the past 12 years, but I'm kind of going into a little bit of a deeper layer. I may actually get a functional medicine coach to help me to see if there's foods that I'm allergic to and just get coached in the area of eating specifically to my needs. Um, so that's a goal for 2021. I will continue to go to therapy because that's been huge. And then, uh, I mentioned this already, but talking with friends a weekly, I'm actually just calling to check in. That's going to be something that I'm changing and implementing daily. And the last thought I want to leave you with is the last challenge is I want to challenge you to overcome your fear of death. I want to challenge you to overcome your fear of death and you know, something that I share all the time is that one day you're going to die and that life is short and I've had a lot of life loss in my life. So I had to learn that lesson very, very early. But, um, I think when I, when I share about that lesson, it's always from the lens of, Hey, life is short. So you go after it, go get stuff done, go crush, it, do everything you can. And I don't think I spent enough time reflecting that one day. I'm going to be out of here. And, um, and, and this season that became very real because if you've ever dealt with panic and anxiety, it can feel like you're going to die. And, um, and death can just see them seem like a breath away. And it's really, really, really scary. And one of the things that we did or I've done dead during the season was I went on a mastermind retreat. And one of the things that we did was we went into the woods for two hours by ourselves in isolation and just spend time with God. Um, but as a, as part of that, one of the mastermind group members actually handed out an envelope that had five truths in it that we were supposed to reflect on in our time together. And I'm not going to teach on the five truths, but one of the truths that it was just a piece of paper and it said you were going to die. And I, and I really have spent a lot of time reflecting on that in the season. And the reality was like, I was, I was, I had a fear of death. I have a fear of dying in the season. And so it really caused me to get closer with God. And, uh, and I listened to a message by Keith Moore. Who's one of my spiritual heroes and a, and I'll include a link to it in the show notes. But, um, it was called overcoming your fear of death. And, um, man, it was just really good spiritually. And I could do a whole lesson on this, but I really wanna encourage you to deal with once and for all your fear with death. And if you're a believer, you shouldn't fear death at all. The reality is in Christ. When we die, we're going to slip out of our bodies, we'll see our bodies there and say, well, that's over. And men will be accompanied by an angel and he'll say, do you want to take the scenic route to heaven? And we'll go and we'll stand before God and men will. We will be in paradise forever. And that's the reality that we have in Christ, but we need to reflect on that, especially in tough seasons, especially when we fear death. And the reality is all fear is based and rooted in the fear of death, right? Even if you're afraid of going on an airplane, you're afraid you're going to crash and die. You're not afraid of being on an airplane. You're afraid of crashing and dying. You're, you know, whatever your fear is, the end result is you're afraid you're going to die. And so I just want to encourage you it from a spiritual level one, if you don't have a relationship with Christ and know, God makes that your number one priority, and I would love to talk to you about that. Feel free to reach out to me at any point. But if you really know, know God and know you're secure your eternity secure in him, spend some time making sure that you've overcome the fear of death. And once you do, you are totally free, totally free, totally free. And, uh, it will be one of the most life-giving things you ever do is to overcome your fear of death. And we, we should have no reason to fear because we have God. And so I hope some of these things help today. Again, I like to be transparent and vulnerable about what I'm going through, because I know when people are vulnerable and transparent with me about things they're going through, it helps me so much. And so hopefully some of these things helped and listen. I don't have all the answers. If there's things that have helped you and you're experiencing a similar season, please let me know. I would love to learn from you and grow with you as well. And I just want to list a few resources as we close today. If you're looking for some additional resources that have helped me, uh, number one, I, if I already mentioned some of these, but a book by Wayne Cordeiro named, leading on empty a book by John Mark comer named called the ruthless elimination of hurry a book by Robert Morris called take a day off a book by Dr. Daniel, amen. Change your brain, change your life. Very, very good. And then Keith Moore, if you just Google Keith Moore week of increase, it's a four part series that really helped me immensely. So I hope this helped you. I hope that it made, you know, that if you're experiencing something similar, as you are not alone, there are a ton of people going through what you're going through and you don't have to go through life alone. If you haven't gone back and listened to episode two 64, I encourage you to do that. I shared some other things that I'm learning in this season there as well. And, and Hey, if you know someone going through a tough season, please share this with them. I hope it will add value to their life and help them. And, uh, thanks for allowing me to come into your life through this podcast. It means the world to me. And we will talk to you next time.
Speaker 1:[inaudible]
Speaker 2:Hey everyone, thank you so much for listening to that lesson. And as I mentioned in the intro, hope that this helped you no matter where you are in your leadership or life journey. And Hey, as you listen to this, you may have thought about someone who could benefit from listening to it. Maybe they're going through a difficult season as well. Please pass this on to them, share it with others. Not only does it help us grow our audience, but it also helps people. And so if someone comes to mind, just please send it their way. And I mentioned a lot of resources in the lesson. You can find way you can find links to all of those in the show notes at L-3 leadership.org/two six, seven. And as always, I'd like to end with a quote and I'll quote, Joe Brooks again today. And I think this is fitting for today's lesson. He said this, he said a long time ago, God chose you today. Remember to choose him. Hey, thank you so much for listening and being a part of LTE leadership, my wife, Laura, and I appreciate you so much. And we will talk to you next episode.
Speaker 1:[inaudible].