I feel a cramp coming on...fetch me a banana daddy

NOT WELL 
GAY PODCAST 

• In this episode, Bobby and Jim discuss a range of topics including Christianity, short kings, and embarrassing moments.
• They also delve into wet dreams, Santa, and woke AI bots, offering their unique perspectives and opinions on these topics.
• Throughout the episode, Bobby and Jim encourage listeners to call their hotline to discuss their own problems and issues.
• This episode is a mix of lighthearted discussions and more serious topics, providing a well-rounded and engaging listening experience.

This description is provided by an AI bot. WOKE 

Transcript

0:00

episode of Not, well,

Jim: 0:00

We talk about Christianity. Christian, Christian Christians, they're all over the news. Fake Christian persecution told people on airplanes. We talk about short kings and short gestures and what's the most embarrassing thing you've ever done. We talk about wet dreams. We talk about how Santa ruined all of our lives. We talk about woke AI bots, , and obviously I, yeah, there's a big, we talk about how Bobby loves woke AI bots I don't like, but not woke people, people to say, I can't wait for you guys to hear this episode. I up, you were talking to me, something you say I just couldn't believe.

Bobby: 0:51

Hello everybody and welcome to another episode of Not Well. I'm Bobby. I'm Jim. Welcome to our new listeners and our old listeners alike,

Jim: 0:58

and our medium and

Bobby: 0:59

the medium listeners, the ones that haven't been here in a while. Welcome back Bitch.

Jim: 1:04

Um, honestly, why would you quit us, you know, Um, so one, you know, one thing that's like horrifying is that we we're on episode 1 77. Mm-hmm., I mean, I was introducing the show to someone new today and, you know, they're like, how long have you been doing this? Like, well before Covid. And then they just like, their face was like before C O V. Do you even, I don't remember before Covid, but we were doing this, what's, I don't, and I think doing this through Covid actually helped our minds. Yeah, you're right. I really do. Because, because we have a connection to connected, right.. It's sweating on my tit. I love it. Yeah. I, I always think back to that too. I'm like, wow. I mean, we were in LA right before Covid, so, and we were like on the peak of our rise and then all of a sudden it was like we were, let's shut it down. Nope. And I was like, well that didn't work out. I mean, grant ignored us. Now who knows? That bitch might be on RuPaul. RuPaul Probably. They're all girls. Gol. All the girls. All the girls, all the girl friends. And then for a while, like we couldn't record cause we were afraid of coming to people's houses, like including our friends. Like we just didn't see our friends No. For like five months. Cuz we were like, oh my god. Covid fucking covid. And then everybody's like, fuck it. And now it's like people have had Covid twice, although I've never been diagnosed with Covid twice. Well, I've been, I've been diagnosed once. And then your partner had it once and you had symptom, symptom af right after me. So, I think I had one of the strains. I hope I did. Cuz honestly, honestly, if you can get through this winter without it already. Got it. Already. Got it. Boom babe. Antibodies. Um, I just wanna make sure, uh, everybody knows the color hotline. It's great. Here. Scroll them down. Look at it here. Color hotline. Tell us what the fuck's up. Um, tell us your life problems and see if we can solve them because we're good at problem solving. We're really good at problem solving. And also, I really want you guys to call drunk. I like, I think it'd be really funny, people had this on speed dial, like when they leave the bar and be like, speaking of drunk, I haven't been like blackout drunk in at least a month. I think it sucks. It sucks, but I You've been, I've been good. Yeah. But we've, you've been dealing with some personal issues. Too much Dick in the cut. Um, do you wanna talk about your issues or no? Yeah, I guess we can and like give updates. Okay. So basically what's happening with Jim is, um, there's been some vomiting issues. Um, he's b. He's bulimic. He's, they're like, aren't you supposed to be skinny when you bulimic? You know what's really funny? Well, I don't . They're like, is he bulimic? And I paused cause I was like, am I gonna get canceled? Fuck it. I don't care. No, literally like I'm don being worried about I'm bulimic, I'm doing it wrong. Um, were you in it? Right? Cuz you'd be my size then . Oh my God. The way you eat honey. That guacamole you showed me last week, that was good Mole, not gua. I was like, this mole was that? What does mole mean? Sauce, I think. I think it's just like sauce and then like Gua is like aca. So I think they take that part of the avocado word avocado and then turn it into guacamole sauce from the avocado. I think that's, that's actually my guess. That's actually really interesting. I don't really know, but like if there's tons of moles out.. Yeah, . Yeah. Yeah. So Jim's been throwing up, so yeah. Oh, that's why he hasn't been blackout drunk. He's been watching his drinking, but now it's terrible. Yeah. I think it's not that like I think it might be one of my antidepressants, so that's not one. My only antidepressant I have.. What? I think I have two. Technically you do. Oh God. Wellbutrin ants. Oh, you're more fucked up than me. But I'm on low doses. But don't worry, I'll take it at night instead of the morning . But I've been vomiting a lot and we don't know why and we're trying to figure it out. I had an ultrasound today, so So we're getting to the answer so he'll be blackout before we know it. God, it's really hard to get laid when you're not blackout drunk, cuz like you look at other people and you're like, hideous. Hideous. You look at yourself in the mirror. Hideous. Hideous. Yeah. But when you're drunk, it's kind of like I'm feeling disgust. You're like, I don't care that my body's disgusting. Oh yeah. You wanna suck this dick. God, everybody's so gross. Like you don't want to when you're sober cause you're like, eh, I'm good. Like, no. No, you really don't. But when you're drunk, you're like, I'm like, like you like, and it's like no's. Like you'll go out, you go out in Columbus and find hot people. That doesn't happen when you're sober. Okay. Or on grinder or on off or on any of that stuff. There's all ugly. Sorry. I realized when I was in Mexico City, like when you're sober, grinder is rough, but when you're drunk, but when you're drunk, it's fine. You're like, yeah. Cause you just pretend like you're gonna meet. I'm done for a little fun. And then you don't, and then you just send pictures and you come, and then it's like when you're sober, you're like, no one on Grindr is attractive. Like not. That's why I made a lot of friends off the apps. Um, and that's what I did in Mexico City. Yeah. Like the guy from Cincinnati, he's a great friend. I'm gonna say this. Yeah. A lot of the friends that I have or had, I guess I've kind of graduated from that group a little bit , but like I, you're no longer a Grindr gay. No, but I met a lot of people on those apps. Yeah. Like that became friends and I did not mess around with them. Oh. And so it was like a nice, like you were a good boy. So I'm thinking if you're out there, you're lonely in your own city, go grinder. Go grinder and just say, Hey, I'm looking for, wanna go to the bar? I'm not trying to take five loads at once. I'm trying to find friends because some people really, truly are like new to the area and that, what else do you do? How else do you meet people? You go to a gay bar, you go to the bar, you smoke cigarettes. That's how I do. How else do you meet people without the risk of being shot up and killed? Well, no, you don't go to a gay bar. You go on Grinder, you go on grinder, and then you might be poisoned when you get there. Um, that's, and it's not a lie. It happened here in Columbus, Ohio, actually. Didn't they? Somebody like killed somebody in like north. There's been a lot of bodies in the Sci River here in Columbus over the years. Oh. Uh, we're still unsure where that one kid disappeared to when he went to Alley Rest in peace. Uh, r i p he left union. So if that tells you anything, and you know about union, remember I sent you something from the union crowd? Yeah.. Um, can we talk about that? I don't know. Are. Yeah, we should go ahead. I mean, okay. It's our show. Let's, there's someone we should give a little shout out to. We'd like to shout out to all the bartenders and, and all the locals that work really hard here in Columbus. We really do appreciate you. That's a true statement. Okay. So are you about to like rub some dirt on some wounds? I'm, I'm sorry, I'm high on some wound. You wanna rub some dirt on my wound? Oh, that's like a pussy. I think like that would be bad. Rub some salt in the wound is like paint, making it more painful. So are you going to wrap somebody out right now? Are you about to like blast somebody? Is that what No, I will not, I would never, I'm a lady. Um, I know you want to, do you want to? No. Okay. Well then fine. But basically this is an example of what we're dealing with. One of the union bartenders posted. A screenshot of their tweet on their Instagram story, and this was the tweet content. Whatever y'all get into tonight, just remember, you can only count on yourself. No one else let it sink in. I had to. And then a crying face emoji . And that's a screenshot of, how old is this person? Maybe kid. Can I get an age chat? I would say, looks like they're in their thirties, but probably late twenties.. I love those. Okay. Yeah. Cause I'm like, I'm like, you're how old? 2240. You literally look and I'm like, what is going on here? I love it that I look good for my age. People are like, you're 38. I'm like, I know. Like when I was down Yeah. Everywhere in Mexico City. They're like, how are you? Oh, now this is not a good day for me because I've been working a lot. But yeah, we were just talking about earlier, we need to get a makeup artist in here. We need a makeup artist. We need makeup, we need hair. Because now we, when you look your age, it doesn't feel good. We're over a thousand people on TikTok now, so we can go live. What? So we need to get a producer in here. We need to get makeup, hair. It's the whole big thing, but how do you feel about posting your own tweet and calling out someone without using their name and then putting it on your Instagram story to get attention as well? Well, I think it's, no offense again to anybody who did this, but it's trash. It's embarrassing. It's embarrassing, isn't it? Cringe. It's insecure. It's cringe as the kids say. It's totally as the, or whatever. It's like Gen Z, like highlighted this word cringe, but then they're They're cringe people. Yeah, yeah. They're like the cringing people ever. And they're like, cringe. It's like, why do you, it's so cringe. And then they do something cringe and it's like Gen Z. Wake up, like wake up and smell the coffee. Don't post your own sad tweet complaining about how someone didn't meet up with you. If you really wanna, here's a cringe. Let just, like, we don't care. We need to teach Gen Z. Okay. When you're like, millennials had to go through this from the start, right? We, like, we were the creators. This, we didn't have social media to like blast it, but we were the creators, like, so on our, our official like, oh, I'm gonna tweet this and they're gonna see was, um, the aim, uh, away message away message. Brb. Brb, um, or Becky's being a bitch can't meet up with her. Yeah. Or like some kind of, or someone's like not feeling it. Dot, dot dot. Mm-hmm.. Okay. So that's the vague booking. That's a vague book. That's the vague. The vague. But here's the thing. Here's how you really do it. Yeah. Okay., you take somebody else's tweet that says that and you retweet it. Yeah. You take somebody else's Instagram post and you repost it , but you don't copy your own and post it on your own Instagram after you put it on your Twitter as if everybody didn't get enough of you already on Twitter. Now you think they wanna see it on Instagram. And really all you're doing is trying to get your friends to come hang out with you. I know. It's so sad. At the end of the day, honey, and this is what makes me think he's not over 30. Like, you gotta just be you bitch. Yeah. Like if, if they don't wanna hang out with you, then you need to go hang out with somebody else. If they've abandoned you, adopt a dog, like, oh, you already have. Um, and also , that was now, that was the shade. There's the shade. Uh, get another dog or something. Right. Here's an idea. Look, why don't you find a new group of friends that maybe aren't gonna leave you actually care about you? Right. Or why don't you stop trying to chase these dreams of being this like popular gay when you're not gonna be at. Oh, and I, nobody is, and I, I have to stop there cause I have other things to share that are, if you can't say anything nice, then you don't say anything at all. So we're not, we didn't use a name. We didn't, we didn't use a name, we didn't use anything. We didn't use a name, we didn't use anything else. We didn't talk about only fans. We didn't, um, we didn't talk about We could promote that if that's cute. It's not, we can't. Okay. We're, we're just gonna move on. It's from that on Twitter. Twitter. Um, we gotta move on. So, yeah, Twitter. Why do you need only fans? I have Twitter except for I did see that like people are making so much money and only fans still and they're like ugly. Um, so like maybe guys should do, it's, I found this Ohio couple, like they both have xxx in their name, so they're there It is, right. But neither one of them are particularly and yeah, but yet they're making probably money. No, no. They have a lot of followers. So I know even if like, it's not so weird when you see like these ugly ass people and you're like, how are like, like $5 a month adds up when you even have like 20 people subscribe. That's a hundred dollars a month. It's really month. Smart to me, actually people from jerking off and having sex with your boyfriend. Oof. I know, but I That's not even, you would only have one, one post every six weeks. So we can't, eight um, every and I'm must and oh my God. Eight weeks. Eight weeks. Uh, actually I really need to come this weekend. Um, just I know you have to. I've gotta quiz alone. He's disappointed. Oh, he hates me. Yeah. We're gonna to go to counseling. It's cause of pro. It's been a joke. I can't even know what to do. I dunno what to do. The timing is not working out for me and Matt. Like, it's the holidays. I mean, when you have, um, your stepson show up right at the exact moment, you finally feel horny. It's not cute. It's not, it timing really sucks. You can't plan that either. Yeah. Its 1130, like it was a random text from someone at work who texted something about their sex life and gave details. And then I, like well said, person, my mind said person we're done with because said person. Didn't cut show up for me when I needed him, but, um, but regardless, you got hornless, a horny and then it's like step shows up. So now I know why married couples get divorced. Like they never have sex ever. So Matt and I are working on it. He's like, we need to plan better. And I'm like, that's plan better. I'm like, how do I plan getting horny though? I can't plan it. That's the problem is that that's the problem. I've, that's what I need. I need to schedule it so that I know, okay, so like I need to get horny for this day. But it sucks. Cause then that day comes and you have all this anxiety. You're like, God damn, I gotta, and that's why you need Cialis though. Mm-hmm. because then if you just get a little horny, because that's the problem is once he's it going fine, I have a trick for you send him, we'll say like, I have to go get ready or I have to pee first. Go to the bathroom, open up Twitter, take your time, fluff up, take your time, fluff. And then once you have cis on board, your fluff turns into an erection immediately. So then you're hard and then you go back to your man and then you're like, oh, hey baby, I'm already hard for you. Okay. I mean, I get the weird problem. Problem is, the problem is, yeah. Is I'll get hard. Okay. It just doesn't last forever long. It's five minutes max. Well, cuz then I'm like, Cialis can't fix that. Well, when you're with a 33 year old, they're like, I wanna keep start, no offense, but he's like, yeah, I want keep it going. I wanna keep, and I'm like, no, I'm ready to be done. It's been two minutes. I'm done. Thank God. When you're with someone who's 44, they're not like that. See, it's like Max, we gotta just hope to come. Yep. And that, that's the secret because then I get into my head and then I'm, the quicker the better for me. It's just better. Then we go watch our shows. Yeah. Like, let's go back to living our lives as a settle down. Boring ass couple years. Boring ass couple. Let's go eat some ice cream. Ice cream. My cream. No ass cream. As you know, uh, Christmas is coming all over my face. No. Are you even like, I wanna, I I have thoughts on, I was gonna share this with you. I'm struggling. Like same. I'm not even, I don't care. I I'm not gonna get anybody anything. No offense. That's okay. That's exactly what I was gonna say is the gifts this year. What are we doing? Why inflation? Hello. But just also, also last year I went wild for gifts and also what did I get in return? Nothing. I literally, and I'm not, I'm, I spent thousands, like, I'm not saying, but it's about the gifts. Yeah. I was giving them to, it's about the thought that counts for something like that. I don't care. Um, and it's not about, I don't need him back, but I just need to feel the spirit back. Right. And I didn't get the spirit back from a lot of people. Hmm. So this year it's 55 degrees in rainy. Um, Now I thank Matt for this cuz everything was up when I came home and thank you. I did love that. Cause I love coming into a Christmas spirit room, so my living room looks great. Same. And I love sitting on the couch and looking at it. Same, but also like, I didn't partake in it, so I didn't really like build it up. So maybe that's why maybe I should, partially I need to do like decorat, we do something little. Like I need to do a craft. Yeah, we have to do a craft. Maybe I could build like gingerbread houses. Let's gifts like Yeah, like I, I like, I can't even think of gifts. No, like gifts and like I don't even know what I want. No, I don't really care. Are you being asked for li my mom match? Everyone's like, can I get a list? And I'm like, I am trying to think of activities this year. Isn't that idea? Maybe that's better. Like gimme, I said take me out to dinner. Gimme a Delta gift card and call today. Oh, that's actually what I got my mom for her birthday and that and now she's gonna have to come see me. So, Did you get that for No. Okay.. And that's all I add here. So with Christmas coming, my topic this week is gonna be okay about Chris. Chris, Chris Kringle, AK Santa Claus, and I noticed there's a picture on here of Yeah, some hot Santa. Someone I wish was, this is Bear Santa and I have a whole script for us today. By the way, if Santa came down my chimney looking like that, I wouldn't just kiss him under the missile toe. I. Okay, so basically I, I came up with this, of course. Highest fuck, um, surprise. Okay, this is . Yeah. Surprise. Um, Santa Claus and the, this is what I wrote. I'm gonna write it. Read, blah, blah, oh, blah, blah. Santa Claus in the entire lie that you don't want to stop because you don't want your kids to tell other kids that it's not real. So we lie as long as possible. So I was sitting here thinking, I'm like, we all are indoctrinated into this lie because we don't want our kids to be the one that ruins it for other kids in the neighborhood. Okay. So you have to like, tell them it's a, I feel like I, I, the more I thought about this, I, the more I got pissed. Did you feel like you're being gas at your entire childhood? Yes. Because you are. Okay. You're literally gas lit until you're about 12 and then all of a sudden you're like, nothing's real. Nothing's real. I'm about to be a teenager. The girls are shoving tampons in their vaginas and I don't even know what a vagina looks like. What, sorry. Oh, that's horrifying. Well, I just remember this one girl, like at school, in elementary school in sixth grade. She was like, I have to go get a tampon. No, she had a tampon on and she goes, this tampon feels like I have a dick in my pussy. This is in sixth grade. Yeah. And I remember and I was like, what? sixth grade we were walking down the hall. I think I was gonna like soon council a dick in her pussy In that grade. Yep. Yep. She didn't know. Okay, good. I I think it was one of those things where she, Georgia thing, I dunno, maybe she didn't know. Born and raised. Born and raised, babe. Yeah, she was. And she was southern. Was she a farm girl? Yeah, she was southern, so, oh, there it is. She might've had a few. She probably has. She's caught a finger. Oh my God. But she was like 13. So you hear that and you're like, you're like tampon. I was like, uh, vagina dick. Okay. So I just found out the Santa and like all these things and now like people are talking about dicks and blood and like we're doing a puberty class and I'm not growing any hair anywhere. Do you wanna know who led our puberty class? Who? A priest. That's awkward as fuck. And priest. This is the type that used to, you know, he Wait, he would come behind you and rub you on our priest. Wait, one of them got in trouble, uh, because he got beer for eighth graders. Um, why are priests so problematic? Huh?? Like, what the fuck? So the, well they're just, it was a different priest too, like the one who led our puberty class, like wouldn't answer any questions about sex obviously. Cause he's a fucking priest and buddy's not, he's fucking the boys, but he's fucking the boys in the back. He's like, I don't know the straight sex by no gay sex. I don't know anything about that Vagina. He talked about, we, we asked questions about like periods, cuz we were like, and the girls were in a separate room. Yep. We were in a room. Yep. I'm like, why can't we have it together? Like, You wanted to know about the vagina? Yeah, it was like more inter I'm like, they seem like their parts are more interesting. Um, I feel like you were drinking. I should be. I'm just tired. I know. So that puberty class went horrible. I mean, as you can imagine, like all he talked about was like deodorant stains on your undershirt. Yes. It was so weird. They give you a bag of like, yeah, here's deodorant and here's like razor toothbrush and a razor, and it's like, like this taught me nothing about how to jerk off nothing. Which I'm like, nothing important where I'm like, am I supposed to come in my sleep? Like no one told me that. Nobody's like, Hey, by the way. Well, they by the way, but they didn't really say like, they're, you'll have a nocturnal admission. What does that mean? What does that do you? Oh my God. What was your first, do you remember your first nocturnal emission? I remember that. Uh, probably, but I don't remember like what happened. I remember my dream and I remember the after I feel like, so my dream was, um, you know how when you were little, someone like picked you up and put you on their shoulders and you had an awakening?. Well, that was my first wet dream. Okay. Frankenstein Mon, the monster, not the scientist who made Frankenstein. That's a technicality that people don't know. Yes. Frankenstein's monster type guy picked me up and put me on his shoulders and was like rubbing, I don't know, like something was rubbing. Thank you Mary Shelly. Thank you. Mary Shelly. Shout out to Mary Shelly. Shout out to Mary Shelly for that. So that led to a wet dream emission. And then I'm like waking up in the middle of night and I'm like, what is happening? And you feel like it's, and I, I'm helping the, like you feel like, oh yeah, yeah, your body. It had already happened. It had already happened. Like in your dream you feel like you're, oh yeah. And my dream, I was like, whoa. What's that? Mm-hmm.. Then I woke up and freaked out and like went to the bathroom. I was trying to clean up the sheets. I was trying to clean up. Then the most horrifying part, I come home from school the next day and I have new sheets on my bed. Okay, we need to hold this, so hold on. No. Fuck. This is one of our, somebody asked us a question. Well, we can just edit this behind that. Well, maybe we'll see. We'll see. Uh, you might, we might have to come back to this. Like, I wanna cut it now because of the question that'd we get. Okay. What is the most embarrassing thing that's happened? Is that the most embarrassing thing though? That's not probably. Okay, so then we're fine. So your mom knew that you came in the sheets. Is that what you're saying to me? Well, she knew something happened and got them dirty in a spot where your dick is. Well that's what wells's really awkward as. Like why don't the sheets without talking about it? What's really bizarre though, and I actually almost threw it in the show today. I am, um, on Yahoo. There was like teaching your kids how to or about masturbation. I was like, this is weird. But it was like a legit article about like teaching 'em that it's not shameful and it's not bad. And like things are gonna happen in your body and lock your fucking door and don't do it for a lot cuz your penis will still up and have to show your dad and pretend like you didn't jerk off all day. Um, and he's like, same thing happened to me so I know what you're doing. Teach your kids. Here's to all of our child, uh, bearing folk. Um, teach your kids about the body. And gays and Lindsay stay away from the kids. Gays. Yeah, gays hold up because from what I've heard, you're grooming. Okay, so back to Santa Claus. Back to Santa. How did we even get there? I don't know. I don't remember, but it's fine. I'm gonna figure it out. So we feel like we're being gaslit. We was 13 and I was at least 13. My older, believing I was way older. I was like the last person in my class to stop believing in Santa because I wanted to believe in him. Well, like what did you feel? What did you feel when you found out? Like what was your first real like, was it like devastation? Devastation? No, no. Wait at first devastation, then I bought into this and this was the little workaround that I would encourage you to do. Now if you still are dealing with this devastation, I know exactly what you're gonna say. Now you're at believe in, no, believe in the spirit of Santa Claus. The Magic of Santa, the Magic of Christmas. Believe in the magic of Christmas, and I still believe in the magic. I've just, I'm trying to feel it this year, but every other year I feel the magic of Christmas.. Interesting. And here's how I know, because Matt and I watched a good little Christmas movie. Did you feel it in your heart? I felt in my heart. I teared up watching this movie called Eight. Oh, why do they always have to have someone die in a Christmas movie nowadays? Well, there's like an absent mother, or the dad had tons Dad. Dad died in eight bit Christmas. It's such a good movie. It's from the eighties. Like this kid's trying to get Nintendo. It's Neil Patrick Harris as a kid and he's narrating it. And then his dad like is dead is when he's an adult and it's like, And so then you feel the magic, you feel the upsetness. Um, my cousin's grandma just died like two days ago, and so I'm like another death near Christmas. Another terrible Christmas. This is why as an adult Christmas become, it loses the magic because you, you think about the loss more than you think about the joy of receiving presents, like as you just went on a whole entire Yeah. Ring around. Sorry. That's exactly what happens to Santa though. That's literally what happens to Santa. You're like, oh, Santa adult. Santa Santa. And then you're like, there is no Santa you used, I swear to God there was like a red light outside the windows. Yes. I could hear him. We would see the sled on the drive home from grandparents house. I saw, saw, I saw and I used be, we saw, we saw Santa. I used to love the look out the window and be like, . It's, and it's like a plane, but it's fucking, it's a plane. But you're like, it's Rudolph Smith. It could be. It could be. Yeah. Santa. It's horrifying. It's honestly like why do we do this to our kids? Um, I loved it though. Thing that stressed. I would it to my kids out though. Well, I mean, you have to. Cause then if you don't, they're gonna tell the kids at school. Well, there was a kid who told me at school and I ignored him even when I was nine years old. Old. So that's why it's like, doesn't really matter for the crazy. I found out early, I think, cause I was in first grade and we were like, you don't believe in Santa? You still do you? And I was like, I think I was pretty young. See, I went to a Catholic school, so we didn't have as many kids like that. Right. You were more teachers weren't like, , we've kept Christ in Christmas in my school. That's right. And that, and that's how it should be. Um, I just remember being stressed out as the oldest child then knowing this grew and I was too. Yeah. And being like, I hid it. I was like, Rachel, you really need to go to bed.. No. Like, we need to stay in our rooms. Like, I was so scared she was gonna wake up and get and catch my mom's like, shut up. Like I was So, you were that kid. You were overcompensating. I was so nervous that she was gonna find out. And actually when she found out it was not good. Oh, my dad had to read this. My dad was, go figure. She was really upset. My dad like, brought this letter out that he had written his mom or something crazy. It was like, it's whole dramatic Christmas magic. And I'm like, why didn't you show me this when I found out? Why did you get a fucking letter read here? Why didn't I get? And he, she was like, Woohoo. And I'm like, oh, this is horrible. So I was like, I had to feel the double wha you felt the loss twice. Right. Exactly. So that's why I think I, that's at that moment I lost Santa and the spirit . Why? Just, wow. So I also wrote down a top five list. Wow. Okay. Let's see that. Oh my god. This, well, there's been a bummer today. There's, there's a top five reasons not to tell your children about Santa. Okay. And there's a, I don't know if we have to read it all, but like one of, some of these are pretty scientific sounding. Okay. From the bottom. Number one, lying to your child about Santa Claus can undermine their trust in you and damage your relationship. When a child eventually learns the truth, they may feel betrayed by their parents and have difficulty trusting 'em in the future. Well point blank period. Somehow. That didn't happen to me though, but okay. Number two, the emphasis on material gifts and consumerism that is often associated with the Santa Claus tradition can be damaging as a can. Teach children to value material possessions over the over. Thankfully that didn't happen to me. Okay., because I still liked the, my favorite part of Christmas. The gifts were second. Cause I always liked putting up the tree more than the gifts. I just like the cookies. I like the Oh, fucking because you sudden mom's like, let's make 8, 7, 7, 8 different kinds of cookies. Yeah. And you're like, you literally what? Eat cookies all. Oh, so I can have five cookies a day for like long three weeks. Oh, I was eating 'em all. Another one. Oh. Oh. I don't like that one though. Now there was a cookie that my family made that I still to this day hate. And they're called rocks. They're little like white balls. And they have like, oh, I know. Golden raisins in them. Okay. No, that's, that's not the same thing. I have. It's foul. That sounds weird. But my dad loves them, so we always have to make them. What, what cookies do you hate? I don't really hate cookies. Um, you're literally like, I can't say that. I literally can't even think like, who's your coconut What, who least favorite cookie. Like a coconut. Yeah. Something if it's all coconut. I like a little coconut with chocolate like we had today. Like that one we had today is like, we had a Christmas cookie today. Okay. We had a fucking Christmas, celebr Christmas. I didn't even think of that, but we did just have a fucking cookie. But it had a little light, it had a little oatmeal and a little light. Uh, it was so it has to be a combo cookie. Yeah. I know for me, same. Okay. Um, the tradition of Santa Claus can create unrealistic expectations in children. When children believe in Santa, they may expect to receive a large number of expensive gifts, which may not be, I think the AI bought AI bot failed here because that's like the same as this materialistic one. Well, sort of. But the, the other one is, it's basically saying like, not all families can celebrate, right? So like, how do you Santa, right. So how come some Santa's brought, that was hard to explain. 5,000 things and I got four. You know what I mean? Here's where I struggled. We were donating presents every year at the church to put under the tree in front of the church. We had to do the four kids. Oh, do you have to pick like the little, the thing off? And it's five-year-old kid sucks. Let's give him a truck. Yep. And I was like, mom, why are we getting presents for this five-year-old? and then she was like, well this is just to help them out. Cause Santa doesn't like poor people sometimes their aunts and uncles and godparents and grandparents can't give them gifts. And I was like, oh, okay. It's really fucked up. So I thought I was like, okay. So there you go. Gas lit. Um, number four. The Santa Claus tradit can exclude children who do not celebrate Christmas, for example. Oh, this is too woke for me. Okay, we can move on to the next one. For par for children who are part of other religious traditions. You, well, they might feel left out when their classmates are talking about Santa Claus. Then fuck off . Oh wow. The magic spirit is fucking back if you don't believe in white Santa . I just like, yeah, honestly, like why can't I, my mom said Santa visited every child. So regardless of Christian Christianity, this was so fucked up though. I was like, but then some people didn't really do Santa Claus. So then it's like, how do you explain? I felt so bad for those fucking, we had some Indian kids in my neighborhood. Uh, we don't celebrate Christmas. I'm like, oh no. So Santa just skips over here. But we also had Indian, an Indian family in our neighborhood where one year I was trying to sell chocolate bars for charity and the mom goes, We don't believe in chocolate. We don't believe in chocolate. Oh, believe I was like, believe. I go. I turned my mom. I was like, mom, what? I'm holding the chocolate bar. And she doesn't believe in it. What does believe mean? Like they didn't believe in eating it. But you know, English has a second language. So I was like, you know, for those kids who didn't believe in Christmas, I was like, that's so sad. I'm sorry. And then you had the Jewish kids who were like, why do you get stuff for I don't nights, eight nights of present Santa. They're like, well, we don't get big presents every night. I'm like, it's silly. And then Santa still comes. It's like, and then Santa always came. I can't, Jews were double dipping back then. Um, Okay. Uh, number five. The Santa Claus tradition can reinforce gender. St. These AI bots can reinforce gender stereotypes. The traditional image of Santa Claus as a white male old man can reinforce harmful gender and racial stereotypes., I can't believe you're not off your foot. You love bots so much. You love the idea of technology so much. You're ignoring the fact that if this were written by a human I'd like you would ignore son of a bitch fucking asshole. No, I'm actually hate it. You would fucking hate it. This sounds like so Lovato would write and you're just like, yeah, you know what? Yeah. Well, if the boss can't says it, you're like, I did a hold one for why You should, but I don't think we've already covered it. yeah. Like tradition to teach kids about value . I cannot. I cannot. You're like, oh, wow. Gender and racial stereotypes. Yes. I love this. I love this. Then I'm like, Fuck off then I'm like, him, her, I don't ever, him and her we're not saying them Fuck off dam. Like, but this, you're like, oh, it's a bot. Wow. That's really great. It's very creative. And you're like, what the fuck? I cannot believe Usually it's the opposite reaction. I know. That's why I love this. Okay. Okay. So basically, and to wrap up Santa Claus, I mean, it's kind of like, God for me. Um, yeah. Like why are we believing in it? I'm still waiting for the damn mom's. Like, well, God isn't real. Just say no. But like, that's their What if when you hit 45, oh my God, your parents are like, God's not real. We're faking for the kids, or like on their death, but they all write a little letter, like, and then you get a letter and, but you're not supposed to tell them. That would be so fucking amazing. I would lose it. Well, then you're like, okay, so, and then like someone leaks the letter from their parents and Right. So every year everybody finds out when their parent dies. But you can't go until your, your parent dies. Real God tell my mom told me my 85 year old mother told me God's not real. But then you have those people that see all those like ghosts or whatever, the people that are like, oh, aunt Larry's here. And you're like, or Uncle Larry's here. And you're like, I just felt her spirit touched my titty. Like the, the person that's dying. You're like, mom, sheep rushed against me. Oh fuck. My tits are toughy tonight. Like, oh really? I mean, I feel like a little puffy. They're a little, I love that little chubby. You're ready to come? Okay. Okay, so we're onto your topic now. Thank you Santa Claus for doing nothing and ruining our lives. Thank you, Santa. Shout out to Santa. Um, I'm not remembering my topic, so just That's fine. We can do a little intermission in the meantime. Make sure you call and subscribe. Look at the number here. It's floating down. Hey, the number here, 6 1 4, yada yada, yada, yada, yada, yada, yada. And for the audio listeners, um, , I really don't know. And for the audio listeners, we don't know our numbers, so have it somewhere, but I just don't know where. Um, okay. This was my thing. Well, can I say something really quick before we keep going? Our number is 6 1 4 7 2 1 5 3 3 6. That's 6 1 4 7 2, 1. 5, 3 36. Six. That's what I was gonna say. And you said five five. That's cuz of the weed. Oh, okay. Now on to Jim. Thank you. Okay, so this is like some positive news. Um, wow. I know. Isn't that Well for us, um, there is a restaurant in Virginia that refused service to a Christian group that they realized was trying to plan a holiday event at their restaurant cuz they're crazy conservatives and they hate LGBTQ people. Huh? And so the restaurant said, no, you're not welcome here. Go somewhere else. Go to fucking Chick-fil-A bitch. Go fuck off what you, and that gave me life. That rejuvenated me. Honey, , I mean, we shall, it's going full circle. We need to be doing this. It's going, we're being persecuted. You wanna be persecuted by, I'll show you persecute. Don't come to our restaurants. Don't come to our bars. Don't come to our districts. Like, stay away from us. Leave us alone. Go to your church suffers. Leave us alone. Like, stay at your fish fries. Like we don't want you around us. Anyways, if you're a crazy Christian, stay away. Bye bye. Cry about it later. And you're gonna be very, it's gonna be very interesting when we get to the, the, um, people's questions for us in the anonymous group, because there are some things. Religion as well. Yeah. Um, but did you hear about this little, Matt showed it to me and I was like, wait, what? And then I'm now I'm like, we should all be doing this. Well honestly get rid of them. It's just like us carrying AR fifteens to the Yeah, to Sunday school. If you're gonna come to our churches that are, we have drag story times at and you're gonna come with guns and why don't we just show guns and be like you're doctrine and your kids to believe we should go to their churches with AR 15. No, we should just go to Santa. I pause at the mall.. Oh my god. You're indoctrinating children. You're indoctrinating your kids. Santa's not real. Santa. Santa not real. Our Santa is though. Gay Santa's real gay. Santa's real. It's a drag queen. Dressed up as a man.. God, I just don't get it. Why do you go to see these drag queens? Santa is dressed up wearing a beard with Santa Rose in drag makeup and a big fake belly. Here's what I think it is. Santa's in drag. Just real quick, I think the problem with the drag thing is that they don't know what drag really means. Like they think it's like all the, they see drag queen, they think RuPaul, they think which, and that's, but like a lot of drag queens are just like, Not, I don't know. It's really cool. They're creative people and it's like, think about like they're creating things for the community. Yeah. Like you go to these shows and you're like, I could not do this. I couldn't come up with this many costumes, this many, I couldn't walk out and be like, this many shows, this many different dances to this dance music. It's the dances for me. It's, I'd be like, oh yeah, I'd be the fat one in the back. Like, mm, I know. I can't dance neither. The community is amazing and that's why we need it, is because they drive creativity. Like, remember the, the heyday of Nina West before she forgot about Columbus and she was doing like the, the Christmas shows, the Halloween shows, the East, like those shows were incredible. I know we about that because we need you back. We need those back production, full scale production. But the, the straight people think that drag queens are like stripping. They think I know. They think they're literally like, it's, it's never sexual by the way. They're seeing Taylor Swift and they're like, yeah, they're lip, lip sync, not singing, sinking. I was like, Lip syncing. Syncing. Like syncing up with you. I always wanna say lip syncing singing. Same. Is that a problem? No. I think everybody knows. Why can't we change it? We can. Okay, well good lip syncing lip. So anyway, let's circle back. Circling back to the Jesus folk. The Jesus folk, they've gotta go like, I'm tired of hearing of them. Sorry. You, do you have any tolerance at all anymore for anybody? Christian? Um, if they keep it to themselves, if they practice their religion in silence, and I don't hear about it. If they go to their church and never talk about it, if they never try to convert anyone, if they don't like indoctrinate their children and prevent their children from experience the world and realizing that there's a shit ton of other belief systems at work just as well, for the other billions of people who don't practice Christianity, then I'm okay with those Christians. If they're the Christians who are like, no, this is my way or the highway, you have to be like this. Fuck off. Goodbye. We don't want to hear from you anymore.. We're done. We're done with Christianity in that form.? Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. I mean, I agree. I agree with you in ways. Um, I'm just, I've been thinking about more and war, how fed up I am with Christianity in this country. They're trying to force their belief system on everyone in this country. And you want to know, I, no one wants to go to church anymore. And you're wondering, oh, we the youth have been corrupted? No, the youth are just sick and fucking tired of crazy Christians Of your corruption. Yeah. Like your corruption. We're witnessing it. You have all these pastors flying around in private jets. You have pastors having affairs with their trainers. You have a pa I mean, it's like, it's corrupt. Well, he's, he's part of the Lord's, it's Christianity. He's the Lord's uh, American Christianity is corrupt. We are sick of it. American Christianity isn't really Christianity. It's more the political movement. It's about, it's a political movement for power. And it's about money. It's about the patriarchy. It's about controlling women.. So, no, I don't, here's the thing that don't bother American Christianity. Just to touch on it just slightly. Lemme get to the news. Yeah, I, I don't understand. Oh no, I forgot what I was gonna say. No, no. It's American Christianity. Christians no . You don't understand why people who are Christian do something you don't. Pastors. Oh my God. You don't understand. We were talking about Christianity, we were talking about raise. I literally, I'm really trying here. I'm like, all the time we, we talked about, I know it's kinda like, it's kinda gonna me anxiety cause I'm like, what was I about to say? Here's the thing for me. I really can't, what would you say? I'm trying to think. What would you say you really can't with Christians or something? Do I don't know, for American Christians? Yeah. I can't remember now. It was so good too. I'm really sorry. Everyone these Christians. Um, so basically I remember, I remember, I remember, okay, I love this. Did you just forget that? So no. Okay. No. So I can go up to a question and go, God spoke to me , and he told me that I'm supposed to be a homosexual. How do they discredit that ? I cannot. I cannot. But how do you discredit that? I had a vision from God. He came to me. How can you dis, how can you discredit that when they're saying the same thing? Well, God said to me that, well, this is the funniest part, is like Mormons basically made up a new book of the Bible. They said they founded in upstate New York and buried it out of the, unburied it from the ground. And we're like, this is a new Testament of Jesus. Like, why can't you find a New Testament that's like, yeah, gays are everything. And we, like Jesus loves gays. Like, why can't we make up a New Testament just like the Mormons did? That was only 150 years ago. Yeah. That's what's gonna happen. That's what I'm saying is like, all of this shit is so pretend. It's like . It's in the book. Well, there's also like comic books with, uh, superheroes in, right? Does that make superheroes real? Listen, uh, game Thrones is a really great series. It's a, it's a book. I believe that. Yeah. Over God. I believe Dragons flew around at some point. I do too. Because there were teyl that literally looked like dragons. Right. So, so they were real. Oh, but dinosaurs didn't exist. Oh no. God put them there to trick us. Um, gay news. Gay news. A respect for Mayor Jack. Yeah. So it, it forces all states to recognize, to be, to recognize federal, federally, federally, so they don't have to do it. State the 34 or 35 states that still outlaw gay marriage, if a Berge fell, if the Supreme Court decision is dropped, overturned, and it goes back to the states, then those 35 states, you, they don't have to issue licenses to gay couples, just say, or to same sex couples. So this law makes, if you went to Connecticut and got married, if you went to Illinois and got married, then Ohio would have to recognize our marriage here. Correct? Correct. So it's almost like abortion. Well, yeah. If this comes down to it, more fucked up. I, I just, yeah. You know, it's just a disaster. But it, the problem is that it lets all these religious groups discriminate against us, and it's like, whatever. Big. No, not big deal. But again, I feel like we just need to turn on. Don't care. Discriminate. We're gonna go, we honestly don't care. Midnight mass. Well, guess what? We're gonna be out there with pitchforks and um, oh my God. We should, why not we, why aren't we doing this? Queers need to rise up. Yeah. We're, I'm Start a revolution. The problem Obama and Michelle Yeah. Really brought us down to Earth and we were like, this is the greatest life ever. And then when we go low, go low, we go low higher. When they go low, we go high. I'm going lower than Bob Michelle. I'm going to the goddamn depths of the earth. I'm low. It's not working. It's working high. Has never worked. Look around. Mitch McConnell is gonna go lower. God. So we can't go higher. Bobby can, I mean barely. Now. He barely the greatest thing that came from the vote. First of all, there was a lot of Republicans that actually did vote yes to it. So like, thank you for those. I, I wouldn't say a lot out of the 200. Some of them I think it's like less than 40, but Sure. I know. So anyway, 39 of their 200 some members voted yes. So one of the representatives. Decided she was gonna cry . Okay. And this is so good now, um, you're never gonna believe the video I found, so get ready. Okay. Okay. Now, honestly, are you ready? But we ate today a United States Congresswoman. My Aunt Vicky started crying because gay people like me get married. I hope and pray that my colleagues will find the courage to join me in opposing this misguided and this dangerous bill. So, despite coming out to my aunt this past February, I guess she's still just as much as a homophobia. Let's be clear, Obergefell is not in. But people and institutions of faith are Aunt Vicky. That's not right. Institutions of faith, like religious universities are not being silenced. They're being empowered by the US government to discriminate against tens of thousands of L G B LGBTQ students because of religious exemptions. But they still receive federal funding. The bill's implications, submit to our ideology or be silenced. It's more like you want the power to force your religious beliefs onto everyone else. And because you don't have that power, you feel like you're being silenced, but you're not. You're just gonna have to learn to coexist with all of us. And I'm sure it's not that hard. I need to see another angle. But he's cute. He's cute.. And Vicky. And Vicky. We wanna fuck your husband and your nephew. Nephew. I mean, I mean, I could not, she's crying better. That's a, at first I was gonna do, Get the Caleb clip. Cause I fucking love that. Wait, was it on Instagram? Oh no. I hope it's still there. Please find the courage to join me. Misguided, dangerous spill. I mean, look, we're gonna be dancing to this in the gay club. I hope it's dangerous. We should this guy built. So are you gonna screen play the Yes, I have to. Okay. Yeah, make sure you get that to me. So regardless, we're thankful for the progress that was made, but also I really just am so fucking sick and tired of all you bitches bitching and shit. I mean, fucking ridiculous. Okay.. I cannot fucking do it. Okay. Okay. So continue on with the God talk cuz that's what seems to be happening in this country. There's too many big words. Okay. What. You just sounded like kind of slurry. Too many big words too. Makeup words. I think your hearing is slurry. I actually think I might need hearing aids. Yeah.. My god. I'm serious. You can get over the counter now.. Yeah, but okay. I can't . They're like$6,000 for good ones. Matt's worth almost $7,000. That's why it's like, oh, over the counter. Great. I'm looking for the $25 one. I'm like, so you don't need a prescription, but they're still fucking expensive if they're good. Mm. Yeah. I had to pay $7,000 for Matt's hearing aids last year. 7,000. Thankfully I had it. My eye's switching. Oh, . What does that mean? That I'm nothing? I need a banana. I need a fucking banana. I feel a crap coming on. Fetch me a banana daddy. Oh, that's an actual quote from someone I knew growing up. Oh, it sounds like family guy. It sounds like Stuy or whatever. I feel a cramp coming on Fetch me a banana Daddy. I'm not even fucking kidding. She said that in our house and my siblings and I all burst out laughing at her and she started crying cause we started laughing at her. I mean, if you, her dad was in the kitchen and then she was like, daddy, I feel a cramp coming on. Fetch me a banana daddy. And it's like, the fuck, the fuck. Carol, you feel a cramp coming. Okay, anyways. All right. Woman accused of sabotaging electrical grid to stop drag show says extremist leftist did it. And first she said it was God. But now that the police have left, she's changing her tomb. Amper rainy. A former Army psychological operations officer. Scary, yikes. Has claimed. Christoph phobic, activist, and aggressive leftist sabotage power lines in Moore County, North Carolina in order cause a blackout during a drag show. Why would, why would, why would they do that? They love drag shows, right? It makes no sense. Rainey was previously investigated by the Army after leading the group to the rally in Washington that led to the January 6th Capitol Insurrection. Weird. Oh, the same psychopaths. She claimed that the blackout was caused by activists who were opposed to the drag show. Rainey said she was questioned by the local sheriff's office about her claims. She went on to far Right podcast as a guest to discuss. So basically this dumb bitch like cut the power grid, ruined it. How many people in winter? In winter. Oh yeah. And the, and then, and in the article it said like it went below 30 and shit like, yeah. And then was like, God told me to do it. And then she's like, just kidding. Leftist did it. Leftist did it. What is it, honey? What is it? Which one is. Then once again, there you go. God told me. So all her Christian friends are like, oh, okay. Like, what is it ? Like, what is it? And of course she was at the fucking Capitol insurrection, like, Insurrection Barbie. We're gonna stop this drag show. Yeah. Okay. Again, by cutting the power for if you've ever been to a drag show people, they're literally just up there, like just standing there. And by the way, they probably don't need power. People will turn on their, like flashlights on their cell phones. Gay dancing. Like we used to have to live in under power. No power. Yeah. We used to be in the, we were in caves. Aeps. Okay. So, uh, continuing on this journey of Christianity and gay people, Kurt Cameron wines at libraries refuse his biblical book events while allowing LGBTQ program. Kirk Cameron, a former teen actor and Christian conservative activist, has published a children's book called As You Grow, which teaches biblical wisdom. Over 50 public libraries in the US have rejected . So we're starting offering to like really to host Storytime events. Reading this book, the publisher Brave books said that public libraries have become indoctrination centers that refuse to allow biblical wisdom to be taught to our children. Cameron supported former President Donald Trump in 2016 and made headlines in 2012 for anti LGBTQ comments. His sister is also in hot water for her remarks about the lgbtq plus community last month. So Candace Cameron's brother now wants to get on the action. So let's say you want to host a drag time story hour with seven-year-olds. You obviously can use your public library for that, but you can't read a book about God. At a public library and the actor, Kirk Cameron just learned that dozens of public libraries refused to give him a slot to speak to kids about his new faith-based book called As You Grow, one Rhode Island Library told him, quote, we are a very queer friendly library. Our messaging does not align.. Okay, Kirk Cameron joins us. Thank Kirk. Thanks so much for coming on. Um, so they wouldn't let you read this book, this book was banned in libraries. How controversial is this book? Well, it, it's a book that teaches biblical wisdom through the seasons of life to children and the value of growing the fruit of the spirit, like love, joy, kindness, patience, gentleness, self-control. And I wanted to do a book reading at a public library. And I was denied by over 50 woke libraries that have hosted drag queens story hours. Uh, one of the most outrageous denials was, uh, Alameda County Public Library that said they didn't want that book teaching kids biblical values. Um, while at the same time they're hosting a gender name change clinic tomorrow. And I'm thinking, wow, if, uh, we're so committed to diversity, why am I being excluded? Why can't I use your facility to read my book? You're a library . Well, yeah. Um, so we began this show with a story about how the president of Ukraine has banned a Christian religion in Ukraine. And then we get to your story where the library's ban your book. So the thread here appears to be fear and hatred of Christianity. Why do you think a religion based on peace and tolerance, turning the other cheek, not showing vengeance, is so. Well, I, my understanding of history is that the family and the church are two great pillars of Western civilization. And those two things need to be removed and taken out of the way in order to fundamentally change the power structure and the moral value code of the nation. And that's why parents are fighting back. In fact, Tucker, hundreds of parents and librarians are now emailing us saying, we want your book and we wanna host our own brave book story hour in our public library. So here's my call to action. I want every parent and every grandparent in America to get their favorite children's storybook, my book, or other brave books, or a book of the Bible. Call your local public library that has hosted a drag queen story hour and say, I'd like the chance to read my book in the library. And if they say no, they're likely breaking the law and violating the Constitution, and they can contact brave books.com. We'll give them free books and all that. They need to turn that denial into a revival in their community. And to Christians particularly, we often get told no. In the public square. We go home with our tail between our legs crying in our Chick-fil-A soup, waiting for the rapture, rather than getting on the offense and saying, let's invest in our children and teach them the values we want them to learn. By the way, I knew he'd done this. He's so hot though. He was. Oh, he's sorry. Still Is he still? Yeah. He's like, daddy hot. That's fucking sucks. It's fucked up because you know he's sucking Ds or getting his sucked, like, trust me. Oh yeah. He's probably like, I can't suck yours, but you can suck mine. The Lord, Lord will look that I have to look to heaven while you do it. But take this cop. I'm gonna pretend like you're God sucking my car, Lord. Let me come in his hot, wet throat. Um, , that's Kirk's prayer. Let's say Kirk's prayer together. Lord, Lord, let me come, let me come in his hot, hot, wet throat, sweat throat. Kirk's prayer. Thank you. Okay, but Kirk Cameron, I have a little story about that. Um, when I was you masturbated to him? No, when I was indoctrinate. This is more embarrassing. I can't believe I, I can't believe I've never told you this. Oh my god. This is horrifying. Oh, so you probably like met him and had a fucking whole conversation with him. Oh, I would have. So back when I was Christian. Oh wow. Is that what you sang in church? Support that low back baby when you're pregnant. More. Gotta support. Oh fuck. So back when I was a Christian and fully indoctrinated by my parents in church, you wanna talk about grooming, you still like you guys. But, um, I got into this rapture series called Left Behind, which was fully promoted by Kurt Cameron and written by like something lahee and probably his dumb sister. Uh, there were books this. I'm talking like two, two inch books, like thick long books, and there were like seven or eight of them. And you were being told, do you know what the rapture is? Yeah. The end of the world. Like when Jesus comes and the trumpets and they take away, they're like, God takes the souls of the good people away. No, the rest are left. And all that's left are the people that need to either be saved or the bad people, the anti-Christ. And I literally read like six books about this, a so-called rapture from the book of Revelation, but set in a modern day world. And I remember Kirk, Kirk, Cameron like promoted these books. What's wrong? I was just looking. No, you're good. Oh no. I was like, if you tell me I was trying to find a funny, I was like, I will kill you. Oh yeah, , um, literally kill you. Um, , because this'll be a good episode. It's gonna be great. So yeah, I read these rapture books and I was like, enjoying them. But Kirk always loved him and promoted them. And that's how I, that's how I remember Kirk Cameron. So that's Kirk Cameron to me. It's like, oh, I remember he is a psychopath. Like, I know he's crazy because you jumped on that train. But isn't it funny that these public libraries are like, you know what? Fuck the bullshit. And now he's like, oh. Oh my God. Again, what if you just left, left everybody? Listen, what Biblical wisdom, first of all, I have no idea because, oh, we're gonna talk about the fact that uh, he tried to drown the whole world except for Noah, cuz he listened to 'em. Or how about the fact that we have to cut off our, our kids' dicks so that we're like Abraham? Or how about like, I mean, Adam and Eve, they're like, he's like, here's knowledge but just kidding. I'm done. Can't eat that fruit. Or you're going to, well now you're kicked out. Well now you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna die. We're gonna make you bear children to make it hurt. Thanks God. Oh yeah, he lose, he really did say that. He says that it's gonna hurt. So let's do this Bible wisdom. Why do we like him? Just question. So anyway, I thought that was a very interesting I love it situation. Cause I love it. It's almost like the same thing though, as like, like we need to start pushing back this. We a push back fuck we are. And on honestly like Gen Z doesn't care either. We're so dumb with religion. Yeah, we really are. All of Europe is too. Like no one's going to church anymore, thank God. Oh, okay. So we asked for, well obviously we've been promoting to call us. Uh, we don't have any calls yet, but we will have some calls maybe one day. Um, positive, positive thinking. But we did have our anonymous, uh, line on Instagram where they can write us and we don't know who wrote it. Okay, so I got three. Oh, I like those. Okay, let's do, yeah, so I got three things. The first one, I got more than three, but these are the three best ones. This whole religion thing. I, so I asked what's making you not well, okay. This whole religion thing. You guys should check out the video. Why? I hate religion, but love Jesus. I feel like we would love Jesus. Okay, so here's the thing. I think I know who wrote this. Okay. So how are you taking that? Is that the bisexual? No, I don't think so. Okay, but how are you taking that? When you read that, are you taking it? Shit? I am. I hate religion. Um, I feel like they're saying, yeah, we're tired of you guys talking about religion. Oh, I've, no, I think they mean, I think they mean they hate religion. Okay. But maybe, but they love Jesus. And that's, that's my thing is that's fun. I'm fine with spirituality. Me too. Me too. But religion where they organize you and try to make you have group think and like teach you to hate the others. Indoctrinate religion indoctrinate you, you gaslight you. Like religion is trash. But spirituality's fine with me. If you find meaning in Jesus and you're one of the good Christians, like an actual Christian and you don't wanna convert other people and push it on other people. Then fine, then fine. Be a Christian. So I think that would be an interesting video. So I'm just gonna play the beginning just to see just what if I told you Jesus came to abolish religion? What if I told you voting Republican really wasn't his mission? What if I told you Republican doesn't automatically mean Christian? And just because you call some people blind, doesn't automatically give you vision. I mean, if religion is so great, why has it started so many wars? Why does it build huge churches but fails to feed the poor? Tell single moms God doesn't love them if they've ever had a divorce. But in the Old Testament, God actually calls religious people whos religion might preach grace. But another thing they practice tend to ridicule God's people. They did it to John. They can't fix their problems, and so they just mask it. Not realizing religions like spraying perfume on a casket. See, the problem with religion is it never gets to the core. It's just behavior modification. Like a long list of chores. Like let's dress up the outside. They could look nice and neat, but it's funny, that's what they used to do to mummies while the corpse routes underneath. Now, I ain't judging. I'm just saying quit putting on a fake look cuz there's a problem. If people only know that you're a Christian by your Facebook, I mean in every other aspect of life, you know that logic's unworthy. It's like saying you play for the Lakers just because you bought a jersey. See, this was me too, but no one seemed to be onto me acting like a church kid while addicted to pornography. See, on Sunday, I'd go to church, but Saturday getting faded, acting if I was simply created to just have sex and get wasted. See, I spent my whole life building this facade of neatness, but now that I know Jesus, I boast in my weakness. Because if grace as water, then the church should be an ocean. It's not a museum for good people, it's a hospital for the broken, which means I don't have to hide my failure. I don't have to hide my sin cuz it doesn't depend on me. It depends on him. I mean, he's also okay. He's not wrong and he's hot. Um, so I would listen. So we're gonna listen to that. We're gonna listen to that for sure, dude. And we'll definitely do. Thank you for writing us in. I think that's true. That's probably possible. I like that. I took it as like somebody who was like, no, I've seen it. I'm tired of the whole religion thing. Like you guys are, well, we're not gonna talk about it forever. It's just that it keeps coming up. Keeps coming up. Like, leave us alone all the time. If you leave us alone, we'll leave you alone. You can go read your Bible, wholesome fucking shit. If we can go read our drag queens show, go to your prayer circle. But we ask for equal rights and then we have representatives crying because it's gonna be terrible for the gun. So we have to talk about it. I love her nephew. Right? If we don't fucking talk about it, people like, Run the narrative. So we have to fucking talk about religion. Anyways, the next question we got was most embarrassing thing you've ever done. Ooh. And I had to think really hard about this cause there's a few things that come to mind. Yeah. The most recent though was me, um, shouting in the bathroom while I was throwing up in the toilet right before our Austin trip when I got something that was the antibiotics. And Michael was standing there watching me as I'm literally shing and throwing up. That's so, that's pretty fucking embarrassing. I mean, you know, it's love though when you don't care that he sees you either though, and he doesn't care either. He went and got his gloves and like helped me clean and threw away my underwear. He was really sweet. So I need to buy gloves. Yeah, we need to, if this happens to Matt, you need gloves because he has blowouts at baseline if he ever gets sick. Right. Some people gets a real blowout. It'll be all over the walls. I mean, I have never been so sick as that week. I really have never, like I, I know I. You kept me up to date, up to the minute on that, like threw up again. I remember you're like, I'm, I'm sharding. I just threw up. Well, I diarrhea four times in. I'm like, you're like cool. You're like, I just shit my pants. I was like, okay, Gary, please stop talking. I believe it. I believe it. Just go lay down. I was like, lay down. Um, another thing that came to mind for me was, uh, when Nina West called me on stage on the little stage, it was on the little stage, uh, axis. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's people in there and she goes, Bobby, come on up and did it. And she, that ones the perfect Nina voice, by the way. That was weird. Hey, Nina, last to you. Come on up. I'm like, so it was like either, Lip sing or dance or rap or something. And I stood there and I was like, I don't wanna do this. And I had to like, I was like, come help me, please. I was like telling other people to come up. I did not wanna do it. I've had to do a dance off. Sounds pretty embarrassing. So that was like embarrassing. I've done the dance off there. It was pretty, yeah. But people like rooted for me. Right. But you were rooting for you. We were rooting for you. And you fucking Actually, I won the dance off when abortion brought me up at Boscos Abortion's. The person that gave me my first ever massage. I'm sorry, what? I didn't know that. Oh, abortion. You've never told me this. Abortion's hands. So I need, oh my God, I wonder. Cause I always see her posting and I'm like, should I? Yes. She gives a fucking mat. I mean, very respectful. It was at, she used to work at, uh, open Days Spa. Right by your house. Oh, yeah. And or wherever you live. Oh my God. So I need her over like asap. Yeah. So I think she has like private client shop. Does she go to houses, your own house? I don't know, but she might do that now. I think her own. Does she also offer? I don't know if Okay. I, I'm sure. Um, okay. Um, do you have an embarrassing moment? Yeah, probably when I, I've told you this, when I was at that fucking sleepover with four other boys, and I Oh yeah. Peed on the ground of the dad's office under his desk, and then the next day they were like, I think Andrew peed the, why is it always peeing or shitting? That is most embarrassing because we're taught to be embarrassed by our body functions. I mean, duh. From the, yeah, from the start. From the job. Yeah. Okay. Okay. This says, okay, this is a random comment.. This has not. Well coupled, moving back to the usa, my husband and I moved to Iceland in search of a more peaceful life due to work permit issues. And the fact that my master's program got cut, we moved back to the USA on Saturday. There are multiple layers to why the whole situation is not making us well. It's making us not well. Oh no. So I just wanna say to you, they had to move back to the US from Iceland. I'm really sorry. Because Iceland is a place I wanna go with the drone now.. I know. And all my cameras and all the equipment. Oh, I mean, we could just drive around out. Could you imagine if we did a episode with the mountains in the background? Yeah. Maybe we should go to Iceland, our next trip. Absolutely. It's actually pretty gay there too, I think. Yes. And now it's very expensive, but I didn't think it was that expensive. Oh, it's terrible. A hamburger's like $30. I mean, cuz every food is, everything recorded, it's shipped in except for some things, but like most of it's fraught in the seafood. I'm sure is fine. Yeah, I'm sure. Um, so, uh, unfortunately I'm very sorry that that's happening to you. Uh, I would say welcome back to the United States. I don't know where you live, but if you're in Columbus you can hit us up and we'll welcome by your drink. I mean, I don't really know. I'm really sorry. Hope you didn't want healthcare. Welcome back. Hopefully, whatever hap with your program. Do you like guns? Welcome back. How about religion? We just talked about 45 minutes. How does, how does racism sound to you? Welcome back. So we'd like to just actually apologize completely. I don't know how to welcome you here. I'm really sorry. Um, sundries, sundries. Okay. You're gonna have to go first because I've been talking a lot. I've got a on, I've been talking a shit ton actually. Oh, we'll see when I went off on religion. Well, yeah, true. I was going nuts for while. Oh, I went nuts. Yeah, you went nuts. And Santa too. Honey. We've been sharing. We've been sharing the sign. Okay, so showering the stage. I'm on the outside, I'm on the No, no. Hi sundry. Uh, and this , this will be shared by many. I experienced it on the way over. Is it cars again? Well, God, everything is a fucking car for you. Well, go ahead. I'm sure it's a great one. Okay. You know when you're about to get on the highway. Mm-hmm.. We're about to turn onto a road that has an on-ramp on it, and you're like, okay, I'm getting ready. I'm ready to go. And you don't, you look up and you're behind a truck or a bus. Mm-hmm.. Mm-hmm.. And you know, they're gonna get on the fucking highway going 25, 30 miles per hour, 30 miles per hour. And you're gonna get ran and you're merging on Yep. Onto people flying by at 70. And all you're trying to do is get over one or two lanes maybe, and you can't, and you, and then you're stuck. And you're stuck. And then they're trying to get over so they slow down even more. And you're like, and you almost miss your exit. It's literally like a disaster. It's like, why can't people merge at the speed they're supposed to merge at? That's all I need to ask. And then even when I'm behind a car and I'm like, why are we going 40 to try to get onto someone going 70 and you're just gonna get over going 40? And then people like, ah. I'm like, these people are not taught how to drive on highway. You've got to have to accelerate. You have, you have to, people you're merging with, you need to be at least at 55. That's the minimum I and that's the slow 55 minimum. Agree. That's the slow punch it. When you start getting on. I go, I go, so do I need to go up, get up to 65 bitch, but I can't speed up when I'm behind a fucking bus. They need their own on-ramps. They need their own entrances and exits off the highway. I'm tired of trucks. I'm tired. Oh my God. It's so, everything sucks and it's just gonna get worse and worse. It's, the thing is, is that we're all trapped now. Yeah. In these highway systems. Like how do we get more? Yeah. We're gonna do double deck highways is what we're gonna to do. That's the car manufacturers and the, and the oil and gas industry. Everyone's pushed us towards cars and individual drivers for the past 50, 60 years. Wouldn't be great if we walked work. Oh, not from here to my work now, but I'm just saying like where you worked, it would take you a day. You like 12 miles. Oh, that would take you a day to walk 12 miles. Look it up. You would need a break. Alexa., how long would it take to walk 12 miles? According to an Alexa answers contributor, it would take the average human about three hours. So that's six hours a day there and back seconds to walk. 12 hours. Ooh. In the daylight, which is right now about five. So I'd have to leave at 3:00 AM Is it 11 hours? A daylight delivery. Okay. Thank you. Thank you, Alexa. Thank you, girl. That's a Alexa. Stop. She's gotten out of fucking control. For real. Bobby loves the bots. I hate them. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Well, good sundry. I like it. Great. Sundry. My is okay. Oh, oh God. Oh God. Oh God. Oh God. I'm about to go off and it's, we've actually discussed it before, but there's something that happened on Reddit that then got on all the news stations. Um, basically a recent story from Reddit that made news. Am I an asshole group on Reddit? The following is a synopsis of that post, and of course I have it on the wrong page, but we're gonna, am I the asshole? A person flying from one European city to another on a plane with three seats per row. Window, middle and aisle. Okay. Chooses a window seat after takeoff, the person in front reclines their seat, but the person in the middle seat behind them asked the person in the window seat not recline, because their legs extended into the space of the other seats. So what I need, okay, so a visual. So the visual, especially for our listeners. So the visual is me on a southwest flight. Okay. And somebody trying to come back, there's nowhere to go. Yeah. He's, are you in the window seat? Yes. Well, I don't understand why this, yeah. Wait, hold on. Window seat aisle. L seat. Middle seat. What's this mean? A person and, okay. With three seats per row. So that's the plain layout they choose. This person chose a window seat after takeoff. The person in, in front of them, them recline their seat. Yeah. So they're in the window seat. They get reclined on. Mm-hmm.. But the person in the middle seat behind them asks the person in the window seat. Okay. So then you have someone behind you in the middle seat saying, don't recline because you're gonna my legs go into your area. Uhhuh.. You'll recline onto my legs. Uhhuh . The fuck. Okay, so think, think of me though. Keep thinking of me. I think of you. Okay. And your okay. The person in the window seat agrees not to recline, but points out that the person in the middle seat could have chosen an aisle L seat or paid extra for extra leg room to avoid inconven in other passengers. Correct. The person in the middle seat claims they didn't have the option to choose an aisle ea pay extra, but the person in the window seat maintains that they did have those options. And you are someone who, so here's the problem. Okay? You tell us because you're the one who always deals with this. Listen. Oh, no. Okay. Are you gonna yell at the window seat person or are you on team? I'm team. Uh, tall guy. He's, he was six foot eight. Okay. Okay. It's so worse than me. I don't think it's very, so the whole post got shut down. But I was reading all the comments and people were like, it was very mixed. Like you should not recline. Like if you're on a 90 minute flight, why are you reclining? Oh, the, I was gonna say, problem solved if we just stop reclining seats, you don't need to recline. Well that's, and so people are like, don't need to rec, why can't I recline? No one should be reclining ever. Thank you. On four hour flights sit up. Right. It's not if you need to sleep, have you ever paid pay extra? So here's the thing that, right, so I just, cause I'm taught doesn't mean I'm rich, right? So you want me to pay extra cuz of my body that I cannot. Biologically tall. You're not help that I'm tall. It's not, by the way, I want to clear it up. It's not a weight thing. No. Bob's knee, knee, knees literally hit the seat in front of him. I probably groomed my knees from like, just, I, I have pictures of it. I look over, it's crazy. And he's hitting the seat in front of him as nothing to, it's like this, it's the leg room. Yeah. There's no leg, 31 inches of leg room. And the, and the seeds keep getting smaller and closer and everything keeps getting closer together. And you're like, I don't, I don't what to do. So I feel for this like, no, you don't need, lean your fucking seat back. It's an hour and a half flight. Like Jesus Christ. Like why do you, the only reason you need to lay your fucking thing back is if you're in a, a medical emergency. I've never reclined in my seat on a flight. Me either, because I have know how it feels. I actually can say that. Like I don't remember a flight where I've pressed the button and. Now I have reclined in first class. Well, that's first class. That means a room and the bed. I laid that back all the way when you fly in. First class, I paid to lay down and there's room and behind me. I knew in first class they had tons, like 25 feet. It's the craziest thing. But if I'm in a regular seat sitting like this, I know the person behind me is as well. Why the fuck would you recline?? That's insane. It's all insane, folks. Uh, so I'm really just, I, the Reddit post is very interesting. Maybe I'll put a link. I'll put a link in the show notes. Yeah. Because I was like, I, I get it. Yeah. But also I get both sides. I get the guy being frustrated like I can't lean back. But like also, like you said, no, we don't need to lean back on. I get it for him. I get it for him because he had someone lean back on him. So he's trying to get more room, room back. That's fine. But like the fact is that first person should never put, so then he should have the first person, can you please sit up? Not, or the middle person should have stepped up to, it's your person that leans back. You're an asshole, you're an asshole, you're an, it's, you're an asshole and you might be the greatest person in the world, but you lean that chair back in, in a plane, you're an asshole done. Especially for me, like, and then I'll be like, ow, my knees and you. Out loud. Still trying. They're trying to push. I've seen people push against your legs. Yes. And I'll have my knee in, in the back of the seat. They're trying to figure it out. One time we both held our hand against the seat in front of Bobby and we were like holding it in. They don't understand. Couldn't lean back. They don't understand that they, they were getting so mad and so they're like slamming their back to, and I'm like, you're slamming. And I'm, of course I am. You're a little quiet. People, people, you're a submissive bomb. So I'm like just sitting there like taking the, the lashings taking, oh fuck yeah. Lean on me. Like, yeah. Fucking crushed me. Crushed me, baby. No, I don't wanna be fucking crushed. And you know what? The next time I'm on a flight, I'm gonna say something. This is the problem. If you see something, say something. I'm always embarrassed. Talk about embarrassed. What embarrasses me? Airplanes. Yeah. I hate 'em. Cause I'm so awkward. It's just so awkward. Sometimes you need an extender. Like there's that. Sometimes you need an extender, sometimes you don't. Now what's your other sundry? No, no. My other sundry isn't really a sundry . I was just gonna, I was, I was gonna say the guy that was complaining was probably a short king, but I do like short kings. Have you ever heard about Short King? Because now that's like the term of the term. I just have to say it's everywhere now and it's bothering me. Okay. Have you ever been the short king though? I just wanna say that just because you're short doesn't make you a short king. It doesn't. I was the short king one time. Oh, who? Corey. Oh. And it was, it's good, isn't it? Oh, some of them have a complex and they make up for it in the bedroom. No, cuz they wanna fuck you. So yeah, I, yeah. So Short Kings, I can see some of you, some of you have the little man syndrome though. Some of you, it's a fine line. It's a fine line here. And some of you take it out of the bedroom and live your life with Little Man's syndrome. Yeah. And so it's a problem if you're a short king. Be the king bitch. Don't be a little jester. Don't be a little, don't be a little jest. Be the king, be queen king, be a short queen. Do a be a short queen. If you want to, you can be a short queen or king, but don't be a little jester. And that's and that's true. Wow. I love that. Yeah. So anyway, again, make sure you call us. Please call us. We, we, I really, this is the, I'm gonna just throw it out there. This is the one thing I think would be really good for this show, is if we can get some audience participation. And by that I mean, send us your shit. And I know there's people out there listening because I talked to you about it. You're like, we watched the show. I know a lot of people, we love you. We're, we're so happy that you're with us. We need participation, but we want participation. We want to help you become well. Oh, even though we're not, I like that we're gonna solve your problems, and if we don't, we'll make a laugh out of it. You know what I'm saying? Well try. Okay. Well, we'll try. We think we're funny. Well, anyway, make sure you subscribe and blah, blah, blah, and blah, blah, blah, and we'll blah, blah blah. Next week is our Christmas special. Yay. So I don't know what's gonna happen there. We'll, exchange presents. Okay. Okay. Okay. What's the price limit? 2020 is good. Let's just be cheap. Okay. 20. Let's see who can get the most stuff. 20 for 20. You can't even get 20 items. A dollar. She can't even get a fucking meal anymore. Here's like a dollar 25. Here's a Wendy's bake potato.$20. No chili. No chili, honey. Fuck. A dry ass baked potato. Yeah, and you're like, we'll try that peanut butter. So Merry Christmas to all into all a good night. Merry Christmas to all. We'll see you next time. Goodbye. Goodbye. Now call us now. Call as free (614) 721-5336. Not hell. Call us when you're drunk high and just want say something not well or whatever. I honestly call us when you're not well and won't make you well Or does it? I want drunk calls to. Okay. You, you try.