Robot Takeover: Our AI-Powered, Not-So-Human Podcast Episode

Welcome to "Not Well", your favorite gay comedy podcast where we dish on everything from pop culture to the wild rollercoaster of our personal lives. In this groundbreaking episode, we're taking things up a notch by having an AI technology curate our entire conversation. You read that right! It's not actually Bobby or Jim speaking, but an AI program designed to mimic our voices and hilarious banter.

We jump headfirst into our AI-generated weekend recap, starting with Michael's birthday bash at Pins Mechanical in Columbus, Ohio, tackling Bobby's pee-shyness, and some less-than-pleasant bar behavior. Then, it's time for half-off BrewDog Elvis Juices, edibles, and a subpar drag show that has us questioning if we're outgrowing the scene or if it's losing its luster.

Our AI adventure takes us to a late-night pizza binge at Slammers, bizarre encounters at Better Half, and health code gossip at Union. We also take a nostalgic trip down memory lane, cheating our way through heads up 7 up, and ponder the possibility of Jesus being a fabulous gay icon.

On a more serious note, we tackle the Tennessee controversy with two black congressmen, discuss the fierce change-makers of Gen Z and Alpha, and share our thoughts on the Budweiser and Dalai Lama scandals. And can we talk about that unpredictable weather and fair-weather churchgoers? Stay tuned for all this and more, only on "Not Well" – the gay comedy podcast you can't get enough of.

Transcript

[00:00:00] Hello and welcome to another episode of Not Well. I'm Jim. And I'm Bobby. Thanks for joining us. Hi. Hi, everyone. Hi. Had a, uh, we had quite an adventure. We were just discussing our Friday night, which is something we'll get into here. It's terrible to remember. Very, um, hello to our new subscribers and hello to our old.

And make sure you call us cuz nobody's calling us anymore. 6 1 4 7 2 1 5 3 3 6. That 6 1 4 7 2 1 5 3 3 6. Like I know the number now, so you need a fucking call. Let me make sure. Yeah. Why were people calling when we didn't know the number? I know. I don't know. And I'm like, what the fuck do I need to pun?

And I personally know very many not well people in my life. I saw Bradley, he was at Pens before you got there. Bradley the one that called him. I love that. Yeah. Yeah. So anyway, call us please, because like, I don't understand how I know the number now. No's. Good thing I've looked. Yep. Where was 10? Okay. The thing I looked, it wasn't [00:01:00] that far in.

Whatever. You're up. We have to start again. Yeah, we didn't get that far. We had such a great lead in. You were talking about, oh, I'll cut that in. Oh, no, no. I'll bring it. Yeah. No, we're good. Hello and welcome to another episode of Not Well. I'm Jim. And I'm Bobby. Welcome to our new listeners and our old friends, all friends alike.

Remember, we're gonna have a catchphrase, but I guess that's still not working out for us. Something about the disaster in east, but we can change every week. Oh, every week, okay. We're like the Dolly Lama sucking on tongues. We're like mass shootings in America. We just can't quit. To be honest, I hate to say it, but let we have another one today.

I know you get the alert and you're like, oh, weird. It's in Canton. It's almost, it's like in places that Gun Law America Inc. Um, it's just everywhere. Everywhere, everywhere. Us America, all the time. Like, oh, there's a bank shooting. Must. I saw somebody's definitely not the guns. Somebody was robbing. That's called a robbery.

I go, okay, but there's guns and they're sh Why would they shoot? They're not robbing boys at night. Right? They're on [00:02:00] robbing gone. My God, I hate everybody. And honestly, it's good. Go fuck yourselves. Honestly. Yeah. I don't care anymore. No, I don't care about politics. I don't care about like I do, but like, I, no, I, I just, I'm done.

Like everybody's dumb. Like this country's done. Put a fucking fork in it. Okay. Oh my God. It's like a Turkey. That's a. Oh, and I What? And uh, and now have you ever taken a bay stir? I have never near. Oh, a baster? No. Oh no. Be now a doe sting. Yeah, obviously. Remember when? Yesterday? No, actually like, oh, I still have to, oh, cuz I'm a bottom still, I guess.

I thought you were aside. Well, I am, but my fucking hus non husband, my roommate of eight years of eight years likes to get his dick wet on his birthday and then, and also a couple weeks ago. So I'm back on the saddle, I think a little bit. It just throws my whole gi track off though, for days. Oh yeah. Like days probably just.

And then we want to come back for [00:03:00] another round. Like last night when I'm going to bed, I'm like, look, oh Hellness not asshole play, but just any play and I Oh no, no. And his with already, no, no. It happened last than save right now. Yeah. We, you know now that's why we need one forand hard swap Enough. Once a weekend's enough.

That's plan. I just like, everyone needs to stop getting all up. I just feel like it just gets so, like, like the same thing. Let me like recharge my mind and make it, yeah. It's something else. Like I have to really, but I still enjoy when I want to. Like, I just don remember seeing some people that are like, I mean, I'm like, I can't, like I can only do like one a week if that.

That's enough, honestly. And even then I'm like, no, I think tonight's gonna have to be the night. And he is like, I know. It's just the pressure of it. I just hate the pressure of like, like if he actually didn't put the pressure. Because he always does his little like, oh yeah. Mm-hmm. You're like, no, we want to cut.

Nope. As Matt say things like, I, why not? And I'm like, yeah, I know. [00:04:00] So what? Goodnight. I'm tired and like, let me guess. Are you gonna try the five minutes before I'm falling asleep thing again? Where you start doing this and I'm like, I literally falling asleep. I was last night and I saw this, I have headphones in, I'm facing the other way, followed me up the stairs.

Instead of not allowing to put my C P A P I then. A naked person next to me and going, I just want to air out. Oh, you do? You just want to air out. Is that in the closer and closer? And I'm like, oh, you know, here we go. I'm gonna take the C pap off, put it on. You could just do a Helen Keller again. Honestly, remember?

Well, I didn't say that. No, I, no. You know what I said to him last night? I was, I had taken an edible, shocker. I said I was holding these 10. Yeah. And I go, can we just pull like a Terry Shiva and you just move around my dick? I said, thank, I cannot. Going hell straight to hell. Now this is a new sex move for you, the Terry Shabo.

It's great. Honestly, you just put your hand in a position you like kind of have to have it like that. And then they just fuck your [00:05:00] hangers like, and then you stare at a balloon. Yeah. You just like don't look at them and you just kinda like OT your own. That you have an out-of-body experience and just try to remember fun.

Um, I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. Like speech shock therapy. No, I need just, no, I know. It's just a little, it's getting a little Mudd. There was a lot of intense, uh, things that happened this weekend too, so I feel like we need to tell our listeners about our Friday. Um, yeah, like, Hey, Carle wheated. You need to remember it.

Let's, well now, well, here's the, So Michael had his birthday last Thursday and you did your own individual. Yeah, we did the dinner all because on Friday annual knew we had our event coming up at pins. We were gonna meet up at Plain Meet for a little hour. This is the place that all the urinals, you can see everyone's cock and I get so nervous in there.

Yeah. There's no dividers. They're just like urinals lined up. But like, I think even the straight guys are afraid. Like some of No, they were, they were turning and they were like facing the other way. You're like, it's fine. I know it's kind of an awkward situation. Like I, I do feel like that's a little, you had to [00:06:00] go up in a throw up stall.

I know you saw me, didn't you? You were like, there's vomit. I was like, yeah, no, you, somebody saw them vomiting. I, I didn't see them vomiting. I think Michael did. And then you were like, somebody just Yeah. You did. Oh, no. I knew they vomited, but I was like, how are they throwing up at like 9:00 PM Yeah. Like, how are, well, how are you?

And I can tell you how when you have half off BrewDog of Elvis juices, which is like 7%, um, half. That's, uh, I had to go to like the pilsner because I was so blacked out by the time before you even got there. Before I got there. You were like, literally, and I took an edible, I think like probably threatened.

It was like, and before I got there, she were like, just so you know, I took an edible. And I'm like, but then I was on like cloud nine and I was like, da, da da duh. You were great for a while. For a while. And I, you know, I had some interactions with some people. I, and I'm not gonna mention names, but I do want say the one of my, and if, if he's listening, He's ready.

I'm ready. Everything he said about sex in Douching, don't listen to. Don't listen. He's ready. Oh no. I'd prepare. [00:07:00] He's ready. I'd prepare for that. He'd take off a week from GI stuff for sure. Oh yeah. I wouldn't eat for a week just to get, I'm a piece of that. He's listening. This guy. I hope he listen, but I know somebody who is, that's his friend.

I'm. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. She, any, anyway, have any, any, now I did take these, um, these are called time dummies. Sorry for a commercial break. I know. Actually I'll fuck up for any, now I need to explain that. So, no, but I've never really taken a, I've taken like a half one, but I took a hole and it's a gummy that is quick acting.

So it, I mean, does it work? I don't know. We're about to find out by feeling. I Marty doing. Yep. Wow. Normally you say it takes forever, right? It's qui acting. 10, 15 minutes babe. It's called Time on Purpose to use Zuka for something. What did you just say, Zuka? Huh? Yeah, babe. Hello? I don't know what an never heard of that.[00:08:00]

I don't know. So I'm gonna, I'm in a problem zone right now. I'm already fucking, alright. Oh well I'm getting piped up on my Coke. Zero. So anyway, Friday was crazy and again, I had some interactions that I've always wanted to have and I still was scared to keep going, but I feel like we were on the verge.

So you pushed yourself over. I mean, I can underlied. I was on a swing going way too high. I on a swing too, by the way. I'm actually happy cause I became vulnerable cuz this is not something I. This is why I don't go on trips though, that involve like bungee jumping and shit like that. Like who? No, I'm not doing swimming with a whale shark.

It's like, well, I could do that. I'm, oh, you could be the whale shark. I am the whale shark. Well, anyway, so Friday night's great. We have all these beers. We're out. So we're as alling, but then it's like we were like, we need pizza. So I just want to, do you remember just, do we get to slammers at 11:56 PM and I was like, Please.

Are you still open for pizza? You're like, yeah, [00:09:00] we five more minutes of pizza ordering. Yep. They're like, I like, okay, we'll have large cheese. I mean, I'm telling you all out. Eat an entire large cheese pizza. I was dumping Parmesan cheese on it. I was now stopping up the grease like it was so disgusted. Now I need you to recall, oh.

When I walked in, I feel like I said something like, oh God, there's a lot of lesbians. Or I said something and I was like, scared. It was very scary. We're getting stairs because we all walk in like, and they're like, who the fuck are you guys? We're like, we're hungry honey. But the person delivering the pizza love us.

Oh, she loved. Yeah, she was nice. I like kept like begging her. I was like, you don't hate us. You have pet briefly. Well, cuz you know the kitchen, he walk in five minutes, they're clean, they're cleaning up, they're like, we're ready to get clothes. And then, Four. Pete says, please, please. And we're like blacked and black open.

Hey honey, we, that's s We did, do you know something recently? I've been doing, I haven't been, um, closing my bar tabs because that's what Amber, our friend [00:10:00] Amber from Texas, y'all are, is, is that what she does as a move? She says it's just like an, it's easier for them. They don't have to print things only for a fact.

It's automatic 20%. So like they don't care and then maybe they'll forget sometimes. No, they don't. Um, okay, so we had our pizza and then we were like, you know what, let's go somewhere else. You decided, you're like, well, that's better district. Oh yeah, we escaped on our own. You did our, well, we escape how, and we saw like dancing and we saw some deals going on in there.

Brad, I, it's not what deals, like if, well, it's an not the type of deals. You think it's not Shark Tank. Um, Interest, I would say there's interesting behavior occurring in certain establishments in our community, but also I'm not fully surprised. And I also, for a Friday night, it was empty, but it was almost two when I'm staring thinking, oh, it was, oh yeah, that was a, well, we ate pizza at, at midnight.

Yeah, that's true. Okay. Yeah. But I mean, I still wasn't really on like, why [00:11:00] aren't we turning this into like a dance club? Why are we having these shows? And it is shell loosely. Every two have gone. There's loosely like that was not really a show. No, that was more like Ija. Someone hijacked this show, baby.

Not Malaysia, baby Don Malaysia. No. It's like, I don't know if these people are, and I feel like some of 'em are straight girls or something. I'm just confused. I just am so confused. Yes, I know though. I literally was sitting there like, this is not what I would call, call for this Friday night. I can't wait to post all this on the are watch on YouTube.

There is gonna be some funny, I mean, I taped random things. I was, I mean, don't know. I mean, like, I don't Well, and that's what makes me think, are we, I mean, are we say this, its me. No, we say this every time, but we're our aging out right now. Like we are witnessing our aging a about aging out our aging. A vow.

Yeah. We're, we're aging out of this. We're aging out. Yes. We're not gonna be like, lay [00:12:00] out, are you hot? What'd you say? We. It's gonna be there in my forties. Like, oh yeah, this is fun. I mean, is it fun anymore? I don't really know. It is. Um, they're good. Sh when there's this, when's the last good performance you've seen?

I'm just curious. Um, probably like Nino West Halloween, 2017. Like on or Christmas, right? Like we're saying Christmas. This maybe we are just No, no. I think we're aging out of, we are, we're aging out. Like it was awesome. Awesome. Yeah, like I, it was an off night, but I'm aging out of like, these, like cabarets.

Okay. Like liking, like I don't wanna see your, well, if it's not Cirque sole in Vegas, like pass. Right? Like I, but we're, we're John looking for edgy talent? We're 40, you know what I mean? Or I am, well I'm only 38, but only I'm pulling, I'm only a today. That's the best lie. Ooh. I mean that's got 38. If that edibles not hitting you, that age is Wow.

[00:13:00] What? Sorry. But like, I'm not old. I'm 38. It's like, oh fuck. Well, and it's weird cause I feel like it's really true though. What? Why didn't we Thinkless got so high? I know I'm high. I could tell I'm pissed cuz I had a really funny Reddit too for us this week. But I'll find it. So, yeah, so Friday night was a shit show.

I don't remember. Uh, we got home at three 30. I know that. Or three. I think we maxed out the whole entire time there. And I think we were like talking, we were like, let's cut a awa. We're like, it'ss closed. We said we were gonna go hawa. And then someone in the group was sober enough. Could be like, it's literally, it's literally closed.

It's closed, but you can't go to access until. Way too lately, which I did see, uh, a video of you at a place. Oh, just like access maybe. It was, probably was, it was. I think we might be entering into our problem phase. Your, your problem area. No. Well, I went on another little adventure date on Saturday night, so that [00:14:00] was

And, uh, access, you're with an. Okay. Well his friend that we met up with lives Young Above. Oh, well then, yeah, so it was like kind of like, I mean I met Michael Access, so it's really not that big of a, it's No, but you haven't been recently. It's quite different. Like I will have, I, it's very, there are just straight people like having sex on the dance floor, like grinding.

The guys are doing the shirts off the girls, right? Yeah. Short enough is dot I know. Bit ruined. The gays are overnight. Gonna District West also, I heard of rumor that union. Can serve a lot of food right now, basically it can't cook anything, give you like chips and dip, um, because of health code violations that I'm, I'm a blank listal, but apparently he hid underneath the scenes for as long as forever, and then they just kind of came out into the light.

When the new owner like started really picking, I'm always wondering when I'm eating, like, what's happening. So, I mean, some of the things were good, but, well, I was think like just sticky counter. Oh my God, the [00:15:00] floor counters. The bathroom, bathroom. I can't imagine. Oh, the kitchen is probably also, again, I know we've talked about this, but like I'm so tired of people pooping at the bar and at no outside.

I, I agree. It's one thing at the airport. Okay. Cause we're trapping. That's fine. There should be a hard line. There's a guy shitting in the bathroom next to me and I'm like, what? At pins? I. Why can't we not? I mean, I guess what? Oh, I remember that. You're right. I guess ibs. Well, I just, I don't know. There's a lot of fluids in that bath.

Forgot you're ableist. No, but honestly, if you're gonna, shit, when you're out, you have to find a private stall. And there is one at pins. They were using the wrong bath. Right? There's a one on the end you can do. I am. I do not approve of shitting in a public public bathroom. Like you can go to the hotel, you go, there's no cover right now.

Go find box. Yeah, go somewhere elsewhere. Actually, just go anywhere else because I'm gonna see your shoes and I, yep. And I'll know, and I'll be like, God, you're the hot one. Hey, that actually is a scene in the movie Tar. I'm not even kid. Lydia Tar. She [00:16:00] sees the shoes of this auditioner in the bathroom. And I think they were like in a different gendered bathroom than she wanted them to be in.

And so she didn't like that performer. So when they were auditioning though, she saw the auditioner, they had screens in front of the stage. She couldn't see who was playing. And she sees the shoes though walking across the stage and she remembers 'em from the bathroom and she says That person is terrible.

Like don't pick them even though they were a great player. Wow. Yeah. So like that's literally though you are Lydia's player. Well, I just had another moment too where when I was in, did you ever play heads up? Oh yeah. Yeah. So you would be like, like this and you would, and then if they touch you, you'd put your thumb up or whatever, right?

Well, I would be sitting at the desk and I would look underneath a people shuffle M. Yep. Right. Did everybody just cheat? Oh yeah. All the time. You do this right in, right? Yeah. Oh, it's right there. Yeah. You just like, yeah. And we all did that. Wow. We're all a bunch of Fox. Um, but how else were you supposed to win that game?

I don't. No, I know that, but you old to guess. So like, there were three people, there were like three people that would go around and then they'd tap and then he'd be like, Jennifer, you tap. [00:17:00] It's kind of a, but it's like what if you like, how else would you know who tapped you? Like, oh honey, I got John Nail.

On Saturday, I went to see Carmen, and I'm also a model. Did you see my post? Oh, why? Where'd you post it on it? Look at my Instagram. Oh my God. I literally starred. You're ignoring. I was so hungover on Saturday while you were doing your fucking nails. Remember, you're younger than me, bitch. Yeah, like I'm dead.

Like I'm still hungover. Like I can't wait to just lay around tonight. Oh really? Oh, oh really? Yeah. Oh really? That's like the Morran Harry. Oh. Oh, really? That's horrible. Okay. That's mean. Oh my mama. Oh, yep. Oh, you were sick. You actually look pretty decent for being a fucking cluster. Fuck. About six hours.

This is 1130 in the morning. No, I am. Even though I went to bed at 3, 3 30, about eight. Yep. How? I don't know how No. Yeah. Oh, you are [00:18:00] old. You're that type of right. So now I'm like at eight hungover, can't breathe. My lungs feel like they're, I had popcorn lung for like three days. It's finally getting better.

But anytime I smoke the vape really hard, then I like the next day, like, you know when you can like breathe out a little bit when you have like bronchitis and it'll be like, and also make you start coughing. You know, I'm talking about like, oh yeah, that's how I felt. And I was so there are like people I know even at work who are like, oh, even on vacation I can't sleep in and I'm just.

What I, I do not wanna get, it's coming. I do not wanna get to that age. It's coming. Oh God. The thing is though, I don't know if it will though, because of the way that your work schedule is Okay. Because you are kind of all over the place sometimes, like where I'm literally waking up at five 50 minutes. No, but I wake up at five 50 every fucking morning.

Yeah, so you're kind of just like, even on the weekend sleeping in is right. I'm like, oh, well. Whereas for me, I'm like, I can sleep in. You have to sleep in plenty time. Right. Like you have to figure out when to, how to slip now. I don't like it too actually. It's nice to sleep in. It's nice to like, I know I can't do it anymore.

I literally, that's what I'm excited about going [00:19:00] camping. Which PS is coming up soon, like in two weeks? I'm scared. I don't think we're gonna do, when are you go? We've gotta do our labor. Oh, I know that's Italian.

I don't know. Wild. Okay. Um, yeah, it's like, yeah, we do need to plan our Labor Day though, too. Aha. Fuck yeah, bet. Um, I don't know, Mel. Yeah. One of the individual out, one of the individuals we were out with is, I would say like he's the perfect representation of a category of men who are. In the closet, but like don't know how to come out but still want attention.

And they are, and especially when they're drunk, they're like trying to get attention by joking or by grabbing your hand and making you feel their body around and not letting you get away and pushing you up against them. Right. And we met someone like that on Friday. And he even grabbed you with you too.

[00:20:00] It was, I know like go full up and down and then he was like, no, feel. And he would put, I think I remember him doing like rib like, and he put my hand there and I'm like, yeah. He wanted us to feel, honestly, we probably, which we did. I'm not saying we didn't. Well, that's why I think apparently, and I said, you said I'm gonna suck your din, bro, because he was like, uh, he just like stared at you like intently, like I think he wanted you to, I mean, I think so too, but.

I don't know. Mine Nextel handles sugar. Babe, you don't want, I wanna find the one that I Now, now Go ahead, ma'am. What are you doing? Well, I'm just, I don't know. I was trying, it's not gonna work this week. I hit send on the fucking email because I couldn't print it cause my boss was hanging around so I didn't wanna print my knot.

Well, shit. And then I'll be like, what's this thing about faggots or what, you know what I mean? Oh yeah. Yeah. So I'm like, I'm gonna email it to myself, but I think I shut my computer too fast. Close. Um, so remember last week when I said, what does penis taste like? We, yeah. So this week I wanna do another [00:21:00] one.

And there was a Reddit pose that said, best revenge on a friend who slept with my husband, and I'm wanted to give some of the answer. He's like, you can read some of the answers. I think it's funny when you, not with permission, right? I've, okay. So like, if you just do this, like, you can see some of the, like just read some of the, the mal, there's some funny ones in there.

Read the battle one. It's like, okay, this says Ew revenge. Just take the high road, bro. Both of them would have now exposed themselves as assholes. Most I would do is spread the word. Keep going. No, no, down. Ask yourself what Slaner would do and do it now. Okay, now that's kind of scary. But then someone said, because you hate your husband anyway, and go, fuck your brother.

Because Circe did have sex with, oh wait. Oh my God. I was like, what do you mean? And then someone else said, kill hundreds while drinking wine. Don't forget, pick me up. There was one that said like, fuck your dad. Fuck his dad. Oh, come on. Didn't, oh my, there was one that said, someone said homicide, which is not, we're not [00:22:00] condoning, we're not.

Also, somebody said two mural plots. Um, someone was like, oh boy. But my. Well, I don't know if I have a question. Why is everyone saying best syringes to pull yourself together? Take the high road, like literally every, and I don't know if you noticed the group, it's called Gay Bro. Ask gay bros donate all his clothes to the, unless Ask gay bros.

That's still, that's the reta, I hope. Did the I'm, did a husband sleep with like a male friend? I think so. Fuck God. I think that's what happened. Oh, it was a girl. I'd be pissed. Oh, is this too, is this about a. What is this about? Well, not You said a woman. No, it's a gay Reddit post. And then the post is, I'm gonna kill my, well not kill.

I want revenge on my friend and my husband. Like what do I do? But isn't that a man saying this? Yes. This is not gay chapel. Oh yeah. I thought it was like a woman. Gays. Gays, gays, gays, gays. So now it makes a little more sense. Dig two graves. Yeah. Give him your husband because apparently [00:23:00] he's a cheat. Just, I was trying to, I just want everyone to know that everyone's a cheater.

I agree with that. Like, I hate to say it, but like at this point, I think humans have proven that if you're gonna create unsustainable rules, people are gonna break 'em. If society's gonna, if society's gonna hand down these rules and say like, this is how it has to be, or you're evil, it's true around sex, especially, like, guess what?

You're setting yourself up for failure. Well, I've never done it. Wait, what? What bitch? Just from, I just like this guy's penis. I don't know why. It's like pretty, to me it's small iceberg. I love it. Okay. I want to talk about this. And this just happened I guess this weekend. Now what it is happening, the Dolly Lama, what did he say?

That I don't fucking, I think he's old, so I think it's like he's trying to He is. Barry, how do you feel about that? Um, because I thought of something that's really kind of funny. I've not that, what that made me think of is how like this past week, [00:24:00] the like Maryland Attorney General released the report about 600 kids where it be.

Oh well, and it was all covered up by the Catholic Church of Maryland. And that's just in Maryland. That's just in Maryland. Just one past like less than a century. And it's just like 600 kids are walking around with that, their full lives. It's almost sad. It's almost like Catholic Church is still protected for prosecution, doesn't pay taxes.

But it's not just a Catholic church. It's pastors everywhere. All of the church, all of these no men in power are doing this at every religious organization. Sorry, I'm just sick of seeing it too. The whole, like sometimes you have the big deep end, um, the Lord shows you interesting things that you're like posting about like your life and like Easter and he's rhythm and all this shit.

I'm just like, I can, no, I can't. No, we can't bring it up. Um, the other thing that happened this week that we have to talk about is the Tennessee. No pun. Those speeches, these folks. These folks [00:25:00] are incredible. They're ready. It's happening. We gotta promote them. Like I don't, this is what up? It's Gen Z. Move them up.

Yeah. I'm telling you, they don't need to be a state representative anymore. Move them up. Oh, they've gotta like, The way they was, Dean was like, I felt like I was listening to Martin Luther King. Like, it almost felt like very, um, like historical, yes. Cadence was very, very clear. Yes, very articulate. There would be no repetitive, no expulsion.

Oh no expulsion. You're like, Well, like, and also calling up facts and just stating 'em so clearly and so could I be like, um, well guess what? I remember when you did this and I like when she was like, I didn't get expelled because of the color of my face. Oh, for sure. She just said that like, yeah. Yep.

That's why I'm surprised cuz she's a woman. But I mean, I guess if white woman can make it through, but the two black guys got suspended, but the white guys have to get in trouble because they're sneaking out and they walk with their constituents in the Yes capitol to, to argue again or argue. Protests. I mean, literally they're like, Hey, can we just like not allow as many guns?

All they wanna do is talk [00:26:00] about, cuz nobody wants rifles. Like, can we get rid of those? Or like background checks or just anything at all. And then they're like, no, no, no, no, no. And like there's this picture just from last week too of like Rod DeSantis signing a bill in Florida about more gun legislation with the NRA people behind him.

And it was like a closed door signing. It's like media wasn't there, they just released a photo later. And it's like these politicians, these Republicans are paid for by the gun lobby, like bot and tape, right? And then that money's also coming from, again, it goes back to the defense fund. It's like, where's that money then?

Is that money going to somebody to go to somebody? Dodododo? And I don't give a fuck if you're a Democrat or Republican. I think it's all dirty as fuck. Now I'm really starting to get really concerned. Yeah, you need. Yeah, cuz it's dirty. You sit the porch puy and have like a sniffles. Oh, I know why. Spring is springing.

Spring is sprung. The, those little pussy trees are out. Oh, it's also hot. [00:27:00] Yeah. So in it, but I also wanna talk sort of, okay, so let's talk about the three though. Like, okay, so basically all they did was protest. Protest and so then, then there's people will be like, this is the same as the insurrection on January 6th.

Then I. Girl. How was this anywhere near the same as that. They're like police officers died on January 6th, like people died. And you're talking about of protest like 10 year olds by the way. Right. It's also like Gen Z and what is it called now? Alpha. Yeah. They need to be scared of both though. We all them I think are gonna kill us all.

Alpha's gonna be like, fuck you guys. They're gonna be like, after your 40 it's over. Cuz you guys are just taking up too much space. Honestly. We might be screwed. I don't know. I know. It's like, I feel like the next generation, and this brings a really good topic though to me. Have you heard about the Bud Light, um, situation?

I think that everyone's kind of like losing track of some things. Like in, in reality this is a company selling a [00:28:00] product and they want to make the most money they can make. They've seen the trends. They know that queer will buy beer and they're on the downward trend. And they're on the downward. Yes, they have been on the downward trend, so they're trying to relate to younger people.

They're trying to have the values of the younger people. . And so yeah, this is gonna happen, but like I'm not looking at this like, oh, thank God for Budweiser standing up for us. Like, I appreciate that representation is there. It matters. It does matter. It does matter. But it's also like, that's not it for me.

Like just seeing that Dylan on a can of beer is not like, okay, our problems are solve. Like no, there's still almost 400 bills that are in the train Royals introduced this year around the country. There's. Everything about being trans. The Republicans are saying like, we gotta write them out of existence.

We gotta get rid of transgenderism. So like, this is not solving that this is just a beer can advertisement, but the fact that the Republicans are focusing on it like it's this big deal, it's only a big deal for them. We don't really give a fuck. I'm not suddenly gonna go out and be like, I want Bud Light [00:29:00] because Dylan Mulvaney was on a.

I want, but like some of the blackout of my life, I just wanna light out the end. Right. But then like the funniest thing is they're so stupid, they're switching to other beers that are also pro queer apparently. Or labeled. I just like, I remember Miller was, Coors Light was like, they have all, they've all drink honey days are drunk.

Like they need to, yeah. One don't, a small, might be small community only, but we drink more beer than anyone. And then like someone else switched to Jack Daniels and opened up their trunk and there was Jack Daniels everywhere. And it's like, also Jack Daniels did Pride Campaign. All of these companies are just trying to make money.

So they're gonna do whatever it takes to make money. So during Pride month, yeah, they're gonna partner and do pride shit. And this is why that's just a corporation. And I think this is why, why do you care? The right side is panicking. Yeah. This is why we've already kind of, we've already won. Because when a corporation is doing it for their bottom side, oh, light, it's normal.

Yeah. It's already normal that you can put a rainbow on a fucking can and be fine. But let's not even fucking worried. They knew there would be back. I wanna know what their sales are now. They're they're great. I'm sure it's. Gen [00:30:00] Z is not gonna pop with this. And if you think Alpha's gonna put up with it.

No, they're gonna make Gen Z look like easy cheese. Okay. It's gonna be bad. I mean, yeah, no, it is a little, I'm scared cause we're gonna be the boomer soon, then We're dying. We're about to be the boomers. Yeah. It's just, you know, it's a sad way to go. I feel like a lot of these older folks are like, this isn't America.

Well, shit, it's not America. No. And honestly not falling back. Yeah. And also I think it's really funny not to go jumping back and forth, but like protesting, like that's how our whole entire country was founded. So if you're gonna get people out of like the, well, I mean it's like a democratically elected House of Representatives and you're like, Hundred, over 120,000 people voted for one of them.

And you're just gonna take out their member. Right. Just cuz Guess what? They're getting reappointed anyways. Like by her like, and they should, well now they dig up stuff on Sexton, I guess his name is. Yeah. He doesn't even live in Nashville. Yeah, but he lives somewhere else. But then he also took like all this money for driving back.

Do you know [00:31:00] they only earn session until April. It's a joke. Like, what are you doing then? Otherwise they get paid, they get to do nothing. Yeah, they have insurance, they have everyth. But even covered when they're not. Sorry, it's like a popcorn, my mouth. Like, oh, do they get paid? But like, do they get paid like a decent salary or is it like, oh, you time salary?

Or did you No, no, no. They get paid hun. So you go there and, and now it's April and you've done nothing. Some other than talk about summer queens and Yeah, trans people, trans people in bathrooms. Like, oh, we gotta fix. And we gotta make guns more available. It just battles. But this is the problem with them like nationally, like that's their party platform.

That's always like fan banning abortion, hating trans people and queer people and more guns. And it's like, do you wanna know why you're not really appealing to the young people? Right? Like, how are you not reading like these funky Republicans? It's so sad. They're supposed to be the business end of the [00:32:00] world too.

It's like, And then Bud Light makes a smart business move and they're like, oh my God, this is outrageous. Yeah. We have to switch to this other pro queer brand. Like, hi Popcorn. All my teeth right now, but when did you have popcorn at Monch? Babe. Babe, you, I think you're just high because like you didn't have this problem.

Oh, really? Like

and watch out Virginity babe. They're. They really are. They are. I'm proud of them. I'm proud of them too. I think it's great. Oh boy. They're fine. Oh boy. No, we're fine. Cause actually you are running on, we are running off you, you Sierra in there. What didn't we talk about? Let's talk about some branches. I'm like, should we do, um, okay.

I wanna talk about, um, are you okay? What, what if you had to pick, would you pick like a beach vacation or would you pick like a mountain retreat vacation? Uh, beach because it's beach time. [00:33:00] You know what I mean? Like it's time to go to the beach. Um, again, I've told you my theory. This is the best read. I beachside No, no.

I've told you about my theory about beach, right? No. Oh, no. Oh no. I feel like the beach. Are we giving, oh, you're gonna hear this. I feel like the beach. I think I've told you this is like in the mother's womb. I've never said this to. No, I've never, okay, so this is like a deep thought of mine. Probably while at the beach high.

At the beach, like Alana Delray. Um, Lana, it's just Lana. Agree. It's not Alana. Alana Delray. Alana Delray. Whenever Alana Delray. Lana Delray. Fuck Ever. But I think that the noise, the sound of the ocean. Yeah. The wind in your face. The, the warm. It's comforting. It's like a womb. It's like going home. It's like your mother.

It's like the mother of the earth, if that makes sense. And I know [00:34:00] that's that. And I know that's hard for me to take serious. This is a deep thought. I'm being dead ass serious though. Every time I go to to the ocean, I am rejuvenated. I'm reborn. I'm not reborn. Oh, oh my. I live, laugh in love. I've been reborn.

I am reborn. You're like the birth of Venus coming out on the shell like the birth of Jesus. It. We celebrated his resurrection yesterday. His erection. Erection yesterday. Yeah. Can you imagine any erection in the loin cloth? It's over. I can you imagine? They get to see everything. Can you imagine believing that de was actually a straight guy?

I know it's surrounded by men. It's like it didn't make that girl. You had 12 men sucking your dick and you were washing their feet. Okay, look, there's some feet play going on. You're eating your body and your blood. You're. Really true. This is my body. Can you imagine Aru one of you will betray me now let's keep eating some of my body.

If a strike I said to you, one of you will betray me [00:35:00] before the dress. And then he kissed Judas like, ugh, sealed it with a kiss. Also, he's wearing a dress, um, also wearing a dress all the time. And it's just like he was friends with all the wars, which all the gay men are now like it's the same. It's true.

It's the same. Like all the whores. Were fa all these people are fag hacks and twinks. It's just now there was something else. I really did wanna show you really quick books. It was great. Dude. Hold on, hold on. Cause it goes along the steps. I am reborn and, and I, I don't think I saved it. Oh, we were Ian. No, it was basically this church.

The p the guy was like coming over and he was like a fucking priest and he lit this thing and it was a rocket of a. That went out out of the church and then back in No. Exploded. Yeah. Like, and I'm like, what? Like what a rocket. We want to get so much. We're like, look, he is risen. Okay. He is fucking risen.

He's that dove flying out of there. That's Jesus. He is real. [00:36:00] Like I just can't wait for the day that we all stand in heaven and all the fags are in there going, Hey honey. Oh, oh, you didn't get invited. Oh, guess you shouldn't have miced to the. Oh shit. There goes Cassandra back down to Hill. Fuck Bailey. I don't know if that's her name.

I, well, Becky Beverly. I feel like it's a Bev. Bev. Oh fuck. Oh, the gays. Guess what, honey? Jesus was a guy. I mean, he gonna have sucks of planet. No, he wouldn't. Why? He was Kevin. Oh my. He's gay and the, and the and and the finalist is gay. It's done. It is done. Like you're the mostra, like this is like a fucking twk.

Yes. Exiting the Twink era and going right into the twink era. Like I'm gonna be so dramatic. We're in the last supper. Girl, you were reborn into a bear. It's fine. I need, like, the problem I have is like our [00:37:00] evidence that he rose from the dead was that there was no, one of his followers thinks that he saw Jesus walking by thinks and then also they didn't ki find the body in the tomb.

Like, first of all, could someone have stolen the body? Yes. Especially considering maybe the person, maybe the apostle just, you know, was going through some grieving. Thought he saw his friend walk by. Plus everyone probably looked the same back then. Like you didn't shave, you were dirty, you smelled so it was like wore dressed with, oh, some hairy brown guy walking by like, yeah, it could be Jesus.

Maybe it was, yeah. You all wear the same like. Flaunt. Yeah. You're wearing a white cloth or like sat down. Did they even have potatoes there? No. I can you imagine much? They smelled, I did. Let me tell you, you don't wanna want, imagine those pictures of Jesus. Jesus dead. Like you don't wanna go near that. You don't want Jesus to hug.

Have you ever been taught Jesus talk? You, there's fleas. There's ticks. There's ticks, please. The bitch acts like he wants on water, honey, got the ticks please. Ticks another chick. Another chick of flea. I mean, flee walk water with Madam Wine. But just cuz there's no body in the tomb and like you [00:38:00] think you saw him crossing on a path means he grows from the right.

I Again, that's the proof. That's the proof. Okay. But that's what's in the bifold. We're just that we're, and then we were like, sure this is my life and this is and my life. I devoted my life to this. They're like, it's in the Bible. I'm like, yeah, the, the followers of Jesus wrote the Bible to like make up their story, but it's in the Bible.

Let's just pretend. Right. And I'm like, what if you wrote a book right now and said things that are true? Are you gonna say it's in this book, 10,000 years? It's in the book. 2000 years from now. Yeah. Okay. Ru Paul. It's gonna be Jesus. Yeah. Well, do you know what I mean? You could be like, there was this man that you just write a story and he sorta right.

And it just happened to be at a great time in history where it like it worked because people worked. You couldn't really fact check things, you know the Roman hum pirate. Like nowadays, if you were like, I rose from the dad, we'd be like, are you fucking kidding me? You did not. You did not. But back then it's like, well, we [00:39:00] didn't see his body in the tube was isn't from the tube they red.

And people are like, yeah, maybe. I don't know. They really write that down though. Write that down. Write that down though. That that'd be good to Paul. Write a letter. Paul, the thessalonian. Paul, go ahead. Put that in the letter. Paul. Paul. Paul. Send it to the Corinthians. Paul. Paul put it to the Romans. Romans.

They're just like writing all these fucking letters, sending them off like Yeah, Jesus said this. We were right the way at we saw him in like, now we're in hiding cuz we're, yeah. Also, um, so the Christians out there that, that I know you aren't even listening to the show, are watching the. Um, but Jesus was a Jew, just so you know.

Just, just so you know, he was also Palestinian. Right. So he wouldn't have gone to Israel, just so you know. Um, just so you know. Yeah. That's crazy to say. But like, they can't handle this. They cannot handle the fact he without the Christian. He was the first Christian. No, he was, no, he was a j literally. He probably went to the temple.

He was raised, he was Jewish, probably. Uh, circumcised. He was cut. Cut baby. And that's what I want to tell the world. Like if Jesus was cut, then we should be cut. Yeah. Oh. Sorry, sorry, but this is a Christian nation, like [00:40:00] people are walking out cut cock. Yeah, true. It's inappropriate. It's sinning. They not wanna be a child of Abraham.

Yeah, you have to. Right? So SAR have to, I think it's so that's weird. Like Latin America ignored, there's like all these countries in Europe that ignore it. I'm like, but if you want it to beinin right, you're gonna follow Jewish one little line. You better be. It's just a lot of extra work for Bobby to peel back like when you should be cut.

Okay. But also, yeah, just I, I think of his really fun, like if you really could imagine Jesus coming back around like the real Jesus, we would smell him first. You'd smell him. We'd smell first. Jesus could be out here on the fucking street and you wouldn't help him, bitch. You'd be like, anything Helps holding a sign with, yeah.

And that's Jesus Arnold's cup. And you're like, no, who, what you've got was one. Did you also. Just the straw. That's chairman and that's Elena [00:41:00] Delray, man. That's Lisa Duckett drag name Elena Del died. Could be. What's another like Del Roth? Del Roth? Alana Del Roth. Um, no, there's another thing. Did you see the guy who said we got a band, transgenders was actually a gay person in a movie in.

No. And Queer Spoke, I think. Oh, that was queer spoke? I think so, yeah. Oh, I thought it, right. So, so he was queering queer spoke, but now he wants to basic. So you've read a paycheck to act like a faggot, but you don't wanna support them when it's, and I, you know what, now what done with it you, I think that's my general attitude right now.

I feel like, I want to cancel culture. I don't know how. I just wanna, let's cancel. Cancel real. Let's ditch culture would be canceled. Yeah. It's true. Like all of it. I would just be like, can we re control all, delete. Reboot the fucking computer. Yeah. Did you unplug? Reboot the country. We need to rewrite the Constitution.

Oh, [00:42:00] absolutely. A mess. It's a fucking mess. But that's a document. Okay. I knows Haiti or founding fathers wrote this or 1642 or honestly, fuck the founding fathers like I hate all of them. There are racist, uh, assholes who probably killed somebody in your family down the line. Cause a lot of us are mixed.

Native American. It's like, what is that? Okay. Elizabeth Warren. That's right. I'm Native American. I'm like, honey, let's call an Italian bitch. Um, now, no, there was something else I was gonna say to you. I'm sure Now, bitch, don't get, don't get an attitude with me and my money. You look like you're about to make buttered noodles for dinner.

I feel like it might be about looters. Fake noodlers. Hey, I think gonna be buttered noodles. Oh, Matt has surgery. Matt has surgery, um, coming up on Wednesday. Wouldn't this episode drunk like this Wednesday? Yeah. When this episode drop. [00:43:00] Matt, you're probably in recovery now watching. Hi. He's probably high on learning oxycodone.

Will, I really hope that goes well for him. No, I'm You are. What's crazy though is he was like walking. When I saw him this pop forward situation, I know I didn't die big. Sucking your dude. Ew. I hate when people, like when girls said when they have like lipstick, they know they have lipstick. Yeah. Um, and you're like, they're just like clicking off lipstick room.

Weird girl. You're washing her teeth. What if your fucking tongue right now I'm watching you literally lick your teeth that. That was so fucking wet. You splattered everywhere. Oh, fuck. You're like, um, and two. Okay. So anyway, my barely book, boring book. I have like 10 models now almost. They're all from Hot Place.

Yeah. Though I wanna do, like with the setup, you're [00:44:00] gonna do the ones that are live here. Yeah. Barely. Like lights. We gotta get I can do life. I can do makeup. Yeah, we can do, uh, so if you wanna get naked for my book, uh, d. And make sure you call 6 1 4 7 2 1 by 3 3 6 6 1 4 7 2 1 5 3 3 6 sundry. Sun dri, I forgot.

Neighborhood cannot do sun Dres. Oh, cannot do sun Dave trick. Pick up your Zumas. Uh, look. What the hell? Isn't that shit? I don't know. Make me feel very genocide like. Not high, but like stupid.

He's risen, hollow. This, um, maybe those teeth need be put back behind those lips. I have it better. I teeth, maybe them teeth should match them hips, but they don't. They don't. So, uh, [00:45:00] I'm trying to think of one. Um, no, it's kind of eastery. Okay, now it, and I'm not trying to call out any family members or friends.

Family members. Family members. Boy, I also cutting my lip right now and it really hurts cause I was biting on it and now it's in the healing's, in the healing phase. So I like, can't speak, I'm not calling out any family members or friends. Um, I find it very interesting that when all of a sudden there's a, a holiday that has to do with Jesus or God, we're all of a sudden gonna be like he is rein happy.

Oh, now I'm sorry. I don't know the last. I'm not. No, I'm not. I haven't been in 10 months. Literally. You haven't gone to church in 15 years, but we're gonna all of a sudden get holding. Oh my God, it's Eddie. It's the c and e Catholic. It's the c and e, it's the Gilster and all this. Gore always like, yeah, we should really go back to church.

He's listened and you're just like, who? Who is he? I almost said, [00:46:00] who join Mom back, who? Or not to that person back, but I was like, I don't care. It's my fucking mom. I love you. I love you, Denise. But God, you're like, who? Who? Like a little owl. Who? And then my, then I, she was like, what happens if we don't believe in pi?

Hell go, remember, you're going to hell. But don't worry, the Easter Bunny's real. It's like, how are you gonna justify an this guy, this really, ladies, gentleman, ladies. Yeah. Like, as you're like growing up, it's, it's kind of hard to figure out which parts are still real from childhood and which we're totally lied to.

Like, oh yeah, Santa Claus is real. No, he is not. No. Jesus though is still real. Jesus is real Jesus. Until Jesus is still real, Jesus is. Until you become gay, Jesus is Ru Israel. Jesus is real. Israel is real. What do I, oh my God. I don't know what Is that why Israel's called Israel? Is he real Israel? No, then not.

He's real. Oh no. This medication, it's medication. This [00:47:00] medication is really, uh, this is a medication for sure. This is an interesting moment in my, my professional development. Um, my sundry is that I'm gonna need us to get a little memo out to Mother Nature about switching over fully because I can no longer go to work with a heavy Coke that's 32 degrees out when I wake up and come home and it's 70 and I'm hot as hell and I have to carry the coat.

So you need to figure out do you want spring? Do you want summer? Are we going straight to summer? It feels like we are, it feels like no. Summer, like it's, it'll beginning of April. Nice. I just don't, I'm telling you, I hate everything and the spin weather included. Oh my God, thank Good for you. Like, get it.

You're right. Get it together. Together. Like I need one or the other. Because right now I'm getting winter vibes at night and in early in the morning I don't wanna leave the house or bed, but if it were summer, I'd be like, okay, I guess it's warm out at least. And. [00:48:00] Now, now back to you. Uh, and now, no. By dedication in the fall, it doesn't get cool fast.

It's like, why do we cool

now in the fall? It doesn't get, I don't really know. Say now. Say Hold wheat wolf queen. Oh, word. Alrighty. UPS, pussy, buttered noodles. Um, I then with some buttered DERs, well, I'm sorry that this episode probably, I'll pull it together. We'll see. You know, it's a choppy mess, but like, it's a choppy mess. Buts a short one.

That's okay. Okay. If you're just listening, you might wanna watch. I'm gonna throw a lot. It's gonna be a lot of his flips. Video was, we're gonna end the episode with a little bit of this. Thank you for listening. Again, I'm Bobby. And I'm Jim. And this is not Well, and we're like little hookers that [00:49:00] never get called up to the big leagues.

Um, but I do wanna show you this. We're gonna, we're gonna end on this note for everyone. So thank you for listening and.