SPEAKER_00: This podcast is a ministry of Grant Parkway Baptist Church, helping people know, enjoy, and glorify God.
SPEAKER_00: For more information about Grant Parkway, visit GrantProquay.org.
SPEAKER_01: Holy Spirit, illuminate the Bible, cause it to come to life.
SPEAKER_01: It's not just words written on dainty little paper, it's it's life.
SPEAKER_01: And so we give ourselves to it now in Jesus' name.
SPEAKER_01: And everyone said, Amen.
SPEAKER_01: You can have a seat.
SPEAKER_01: If you have a Bible, I invite you to take it and open it up to uh Ephesians chapter 5.
SPEAKER_01: And if you don't have one, there's one on your row there.
SPEAKER_01: I'm on page 978.
SPEAKER_01: 978.
SPEAKER_01: And I want to talk to you for our guests.
SPEAKER_01: We started a new series last week called Marriage Matters.
SPEAKER_01: And we and last week we talked about the creation of marriage.
SPEAKER_01: And today I want to talk about the content of marriage.
SPEAKER_01: The content of marriage.
SPEAKER_01: Every marriage relationship in this room.
SPEAKER_01: And for you single people, you'll get married one day.
SPEAKER_01: For many of you, most of you, and your relationship will look every marriage is different, okay?
SPEAKER_01: Every marriage is, I don't think they're all one size fits all, but the Bible's very clear that these things we're going to talk about today should be a part of every marriage, okay?
SPEAKER_01: Now, before we start reading Ephesians chapter 5, I want to just say this by way of introduction, uh, and hopefully kind of sharpen your focus as you listen.
SPEAKER_01: One of the biggest mistakes that we make in America when it comes to marriage is if you're a single person, uh you kind of look around and you think, I want to find my soulmate.
SPEAKER_01: I want to find my soulmate.
SPEAKER_01: And I want to say, don't put your energy into finding your quote-unquote soulmate as much as put your energy into having a right understanding, a biblical understanding of what marriage is and what God intends for it to be.
SPEAKER_01: Because you can find your soulmate and invite them into a wrong definition of marriage and have a horrible marriage for a long time.
SPEAKER_01: And so, but you got your soulmate, and so you kind of wake up and you're like, I found my soulmate.
SPEAKER_01: Why is it not like because you spent too much time on that and not have a say?
SPEAKER_01: I want to understand what marriage is about, the content of marriage.
SPEAKER_01: The Bible speaks very clearly to five things that should be involved, should be a part of every marriage relationship.
SPEAKER_01: And it's starting in Ephesians 5, verse 22, the Bible says, Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord.
SPEAKER_01: For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is head of the church, his body, and is himself its savior.
SPEAKER_01: Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.
SPEAKER_01: Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle, or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.
SPEAKER_01: In the same way, husbands should love their wives as their own bodies.
SPEAKER_01: He who loves his wife loves himself.
SPEAKER_01: For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it just as Christ does the church, because we're members of his body.
SPEAKER_01: Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.
SPEAKER_01: This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ in the church.
SPEAKER_01: However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
SPEAKER_01: There's five things in the in that little section that we read, and I just want to kind of walk through them as we walk through the text.
SPEAKER_01: And the first one is simply this right here is submission.
SPEAKER_01: Submission.
SPEAKER_01: Now, when you read in verse 22 and it says, Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord, and it goes on talking about submission.
SPEAKER_01: It's easy, ladies, to kind of go, oh, great, here we go, talking about submission.
SPEAKER_01: Let me just say this: uh submission is not about I give.
SPEAKER_01: It's not about, okay, I give, okay, have your way.
SPEAKER_01: Because it's not saying, oh, you're a second-class citizen, and so therefore your husband gets to make all the decisions.
SPEAKER_01: That's not submission.
SPEAKER_01: It's not I give as much as I understand.
SPEAKER_01: I understand.
SPEAKER_01: And you say, what do you mean?
SPEAKER_01: Let me say this.
SPEAKER_01: Uh, by submitting to your husband when his leadership, his headship in the home, you're requiring two things of him.
SPEAKER_01: Number one, you're requiring him to be the person, the man that God has called him to be.
SPEAKER_01: And number two, you're requiring him to be the man that you need him to be.
SPEAKER_01: It's a win-win, you say, Well, what do you mean?
SPEAKER_01: How do you get that way?
SPEAKER_01: Let me back up because to understand you've got to get the flow of thought because this earlier section in the Greek is just one long sentence, okay?
SPEAKER_01: So I want to go from verse 22 up to verse 15 so we can kind of pick up the flow of thought.
SPEAKER_01: And I want you to hear what the Bible says in verse 15 of Ephesians 5.
SPEAKER_01: He says, Look carefully then how you walk.
SPEAKER_01: Not as unwise, but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.
SPEAKER_01: Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.
SPEAKER_01: And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit.
SPEAKER_01: Addressing, now here, that that's very that that's easy to understand.
SPEAKER_01: He says, Don't get drunk with wine, because that's debauchery.
SPEAKER_01: That's a big byboard that means, because if you get drunk with wine, you're gonna do dumb stuff like call your ex that late-night drunk dial.
SPEAKER_01: Yes, there's someone over there that's done that.
SPEAKER_01: Anybody over here done that?
SPEAKER_01: You're like, baby, I know it's 1.30, but are you sleepy?
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I was asleep.
SPEAKER_01: We broke up six months ago.
SPEAKER_01: I still love you, though.
SPEAKER_01: No, you're drunk.
SPEAKER_01: That's debauchery, okay?
SPEAKER_01: That's you doing things under the influence that you wouldn't normally do, okay?
SPEAKER_01: But the Bible says like this.
SPEAKER_01: He says, hey, don't be drunk with wine.
SPEAKER_01: He doesn't say, hey, don't have a glass or two of wine.
SPEAKER_01: Enjoy you some good wine.
SPEAKER_01: Just don't get drunk and act stupid.
SPEAKER_01: He says, hey, don't get drunk with wine, but be filled with the Spirit.
SPEAKER_01: Addressing one, and we understand that.
SPEAKER_01: Here's the part we don't understand, verse 19.
SPEAKER_01: Addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with all your heart.
SPEAKER_01: Now, if you're a man, you read that and you're kind of like, you want me to what?
SPEAKER_01: Singing and making melody in your heart.
SPEAKER_01: What do you mean?
SPEAKER_01: Sounds like the tooth fairy.
SPEAKER_01: Are you kidding me?
SPEAKER_01: No.
SPEAKER_01: Have you ever found yourself in such a good mood that you're just humming or singing without even thinking about humming or singing?
SPEAKER_01: That's what the Bible does.
SPEAKER_01: That's how the Bible describes being filled with the Spirit.
SPEAKER_01: See, marriage is hard and so, but and submission is impossible.
SPEAKER_01: But if two people are filled with Spirit, basically, that's the Bible's way of saying if this person has a relationship with God and this person has a relationship with God.
SPEAKER_01: Now look at me.
SPEAKER_01: I'm not saying this person believes in God and this person has a relationship.
SPEAKER_01: That's not what the Bible's talking about.
SPEAKER_01: He says, hey, you're filled with, you're controlled by.
SPEAKER_01: And it's a priority that is obvious.
SPEAKER_01: It's an inward priority that is obvious to everyone around you that, hey, my faith is a very important part of how I do life.
SPEAKER_01: But the Bible says, hey, to be filled with the Spirit is to have, it's kind of like, just imagine if you were a kid, seven years old, you come downstairs and you see your dad coming out of the basement and closing a door and you hear music and it sounds like a carnival, and you're like, no, wait a minute, what is that?
SPEAKER_01: And your dad's like, well, uh, nothing.
SPEAKER_01: You're like, no, I heard something.
SPEAKER_01: And you're like, well, your mom and dad have a carnival in the basement.
SPEAKER_01: We just haven't told you all these years.
SPEAKER_01: And you went downstairs, and there's like the bearded lady and the fire-eating midget and a carousel and a ring toss and all this stuff.
SPEAKER_01: And for seven years of your life, you lived, and that was you never knew that existed.
SPEAKER_01: Would you not be just living with your parents?
SPEAKER_01: Like, why didn't you tell me?
SPEAKER_01: I wish you could see your faces.
SPEAKER_01: Y'all, like, how you gonna connect this to the Bible?
SPEAKER_01: Let's go, right?
SPEAKER_01: Let's see that, let's see you connect this dot there, ADD boy, okay?
SPEAKER_01: I forgot to take my medication this morning, but let me see what I can do.
SPEAKER_01: The Bible says being filled with the Spirit when it says singing and make it melody in your heart to God.
SPEAKER_01: It means that there's such an inward reality.
SPEAKER_01: It's like you got a carnival going on in here, and you're just kind of like, whoa! It's hard to explain.
SPEAKER_01: It's like I was in Walmart about 10 days ago, and I'm I'm I'm not even aware, and the lady checking me out, and she goes, Somebody's in a good mood.
SPEAKER_01: And I went, Oh, it's not a mood as much as an understanding.
SPEAKER_01: And she's like, excuse me.
SPEAKER_01: I said, I just I I don't know, I just think in that all my sins, past, present, and future, forgiven.
SPEAKER_01: It just kind of makes me wonder why do I want to sin anymore?
SPEAKER_01: I mean, it's just been taken care of by Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: And she's like, eek, eek.
SPEAKER_01: And I'm thinking, okay, I said, I just I just made that awkward, didn't I?
SPEAKER_01: And she went, no, say that again.
SPEAKER_01: So I just said it again.
SPEAKER_01: And part of me, I was just really enjoying myself, and I was just kind of like, I gotta come out of this inward and I gotta have this conversation.
SPEAKER_01: And I didn't pull out religious information.
SPEAKER_01: I didn't say, hey, by the way, I just said that that that's at the core of all this.
SPEAKER_01: Is it is that God sent his son to pay the price for our sin, my sin, your sin.
SPEAKER_01: I don't know about you, but I I did a lot of crazy stuff, and she's like, Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01: And I said, So sometimes I find myself just unconsciously thinking about that.
SPEAKER_01: I didn't say, because I'm filled with the spirit, I just said sometimes there's like a party goes on in my heart and it just kind of spills out.
SPEAKER_01: And she said, Party in your heart, yeah.
SPEAKER_01: But no one's sipping on gin and juice.
SPEAKER_01: And drinking mad dog.
SPEAKER_01: And I said, You ever drink mad dog?
SPEAKER_01: And she goes, Child, please.
SPEAKER_01: I said, That is an African American, yes, isn't it?
SPEAKER_01: She goes, Show enough, and some boons farm, too.
SPEAKER_01: Listen, I drank so much boons farm one night at a party, I puked purple the next day.
SPEAKER_01: And she said, You had some boons farm.
SPEAKER_01: You went up on the hill, didn't you?
SPEAKER_01: And all of a sudden the guy in line is like, Are y'all done with high school here?
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, we're just having a connecting conversation.
SPEAKER_01: Go ahead.
SPEAKER_01: I said, nice meeting you.
SPEAKER_01: She said, Thanks for telling me what you told me.
SPEAKER_01: When's the last time you had a spiritual conversation with somebody and they thanked you for it?
SPEAKER_01: See, the Bible says to be filled with the Spirit, when you come to submission with that, because that's what he comes to, because he says, Hey, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.
SPEAKER_01: So when two people who have a relationship with God, they're filled with spirit, they submit to each other as Christians.
SPEAKER_01: When the Bible says to wives, in verse 22, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord, you don't think, oh, for the love of God, why is the Bible hating on women?
SPEAKER_01: No, the Bible's saying, hey, you require your husband to man up and stop being passive and get a clue and be intentional and be the spiritual leader.
SPEAKER_01: Translation, be the man the Bible says he should be and the man you need him to be.
SPEAKER_01: That's what the Bible means when it says, hey, wives, submit to your husbands.
SPEAKER_01: See, the first thing that should be involved in a part of every relationship is submission.
SPEAKER_01: Secondly, is sacrifice.
SPEAKER_01: You women are like, man, we got it hard.
SPEAKER_01: Look at verse 25.
SPEAKER_01: Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.
SPEAKER_01: Just stop right there.
SPEAKER_01: Husbands, love your wives.
SPEAKER_01: By the way, verses 25, 26, and 27 are a 59-word sentence that every man should memorize.
SPEAKER_01: Matter of fact, you should memorize that this week, men.
SPEAKER_01: It's not hard.
SPEAKER_01: 59-word sentence.
SPEAKER_01: Have you ever spoken a 59-word sentence?
SPEAKER_01: I mean, it's just 59-word sentence.
SPEAKER_01: And it starts with husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.
SPEAKER_01: What do you mean?
SPEAKER_01: That's sacrifice.
SPEAKER_01: There's nothing that you love that you don't give up yourself for.
SPEAKER_01: It's always been that way.
SPEAKER_01: It's the way God designed it, it's the way the Bible teaches it.
SPEAKER_01: Romans 5.8 says, for God has demonstrated his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
SPEAKER_01: God doesn't say, I love you, take me at my word.
SPEAKER_01: He goes on record with this undeniable factual reality.
SPEAKER_01: He sacrificed his son on the cross.
SPEAKER_01: And so just to say, hey, if you wonder how I feel, I present exhibit A.
SPEAKER_01: Because love always involves sacrifice.
SPEAKER_01: Anything you love, you have to sacrifice for.
SPEAKER_01: If you want to get better at golf, you love golf, you sacrifice.
SPEAKER_01: You don't complain about that.
SPEAKER_01: You just whatever you love, it involves sacrifice.
SPEAKER_01: The Bible says, men, because of this, hey, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.
SPEAKER_01: Now, that this is where being a Christian keeps me as a husband from keeping score.
SPEAKER_01: About all the little sacrifices I have to make.
SPEAKER_01: Because here's the deal: at the root of all of this, this all is made possible to me.
SPEAKER_01: Let me just own this myself because I this all got started because God loved me and gave his son for me.
SPEAKER_01: So when my life and my marriage to my wife, my relationship with my kids calls for sacrifice, I can't spit the bit like, oh, are you kidding me?
SPEAKER_01: I mean, I work, I got a job, I provide, I pay all these bills around here.
SPEAKER_01: What more do you want me to do?
SPEAKER_01: Sacrifice.
SPEAKER_01: It's not this big grandiose, like, oh, here I go, dying on the cross for my family.
SPEAKER_01: Jesus already done that.
SPEAKER_01: It's like this morning when I got up and I opened the refrigerator to get a little glass of milk, and there was about that much milk left in there.
SPEAKER_01: And I went out in the garage refrigerator.
SPEAKER_01: See, this is a first world problem, okay?
SPEAKER_01: I have a refrigerator in my house, in my kitchen, and I have another refrigerator in my garage.
SPEAKER_01: It's just, don't forget, don't miss that.
SPEAKER_01: We act like, oh, it's so hard here.
SPEAKER_01: So I walk out there, open that thing up, there's no milk.
SPEAKER_01: This little voice in me said, Hey, by the way, today you get to go to the grocery store.
SPEAKER_01: Now, my wife would gladly look up.
SPEAKER_01: My wife does all the grocery shopping.
SPEAKER_01: But this little voice says, Hey, why don't you sacrifice and just make your little list?
SPEAKER_01: Because I noticed stuff like I love hot sauce where I always have a hot sauce at my house.
SPEAKER_01: I love, I don't like like tomato-y sweet.
SPEAKER_01: I like it hot.
SPEAKER_01: It's called hot sauce for a reason, okay?
SPEAKER_01: And so I get hot, hot sauce.
SPEAKER_01: And so I got me a little list going.
SPEAKER_01: Give me some man snacks and honeydoing anything else.
SPEAKER_01: No, my wife does all that.
SPEAKER_01: She takes care of our house, hums along, okay?
SPEAKER_01: Because my wife does everything.
SPEAKER_01: But I just sense God saying, Hey, today I want you to go to the grocery store.
SPEAKER_01: I don't, I mean, don't let Marcia go.
SPEAKER_01: She's done planning.
SPEAKER_01: You go.
SPEAKER_01: Here was my first thought.
SPEAKER_01: Went to my head.
SPEAKER_01: You mean after preaching three times?
SPEAKER_01: I know you never keep score in your relationship.
SPEAKER_01: You never think there's no way he could be as tired as I am.
SPEAKER_01: Remember, we had our first child, and the baby get up in the middle of the night, and Marcia reached over and lovingly tap me and kind of go, Are you Are you awake?
SPEAKER_01: And I'd be like, That was my signal.
SPEAKER_01: No, I'm not awake.
SPEAKER_01: And she would just pat me and get out of bed and go get the kid.
SPEAKER_01: And then she caught on after about three weeks.
SPEAKER_01: And then be like, It's your turn.
SPEAKER_01: Like, I'm awake.
SPEAKER_01: I know you are.
SPEAKER_01: Like, I'm going to get the kid.
SPEAKER_01: Here we go.
SPEAKER_01: So I just made a little note.
SPEAKER_01: Hey, no big sacrifice.
SPEAKER_01: It's inconvenient.
SPEAKER_01: But let me tell you something.
SPEAKER_01: Loving people, not convenient.
SPEAKER_01: It's not.
SPEAKER_01: Loving your wife, not always convenient.
SPEAKER_01: Not always going to be an immediate return on that investment.
SPEAKER_01: So I'm I'm thinking, okay, I got to get this, I gotta get this, got me a little list going.
SPEAKER_01: And then it dawns on me, because yesterday I took my 16-year-old out in the country in Fulster to shoot guns.
SPEAKER_01: I got a nine millimeter Glock and I like to shoot stuff, and I want my kids to know, hey, your dad from about 15 yards can put it in a pattern about that big.
SPEAKER_01: She's like, let me see, Dad.
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, okay.
SPEAKER_01: Pow, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop.
SPEAKER_01: Two things about living in Texas: no state income tax and the castle doctrine.
SPEAKER_01: Unless you own a handgun, you don't know what I said just then.
SPEAKER_01: She's like, What's that castle doctrine?
SPEAKER_01: It means if your home's your castle, somebody breaks in, you can defend your home.
SPEAKER_01: That means center mass.
SPEAKER_01: I said, You know what's those targets we're shooting at?
SPEAKER_01: They're not animals.
SPEAKER_01: She's like, Whoa, Dad, you're a preacher.
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, and then my buddy pulled out a real gun, an AR-15, with a big clip in it and goes, You want to shoot this?
SPEAKER_01: Does a wild bear sleep in the woods?
SPEAKER_01: I was shooting like a deer off.
SPEAKER_01: He goes, put that chicken wing down, because if you're around a corner and that thing's out, they'll shoot you.
SPEAKER_01: Like, what are we doing?
SPEAKER_01: Like urban assault here?
SPEAKER_01: So I'm shooting it.
SPEAKER_01: And by the way, as fast as you can pull the trigger, that thing, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop.
SPEAKER_01: And he said, This gun is so powerful that you can shoot somebody, and the bullet hits them before they hear the speed of the sound.
SPEAKER_01: Because this thing is faster than the speed of sound.
SPEAKER_01: So you can kill somebody and they'll never hear it coming.
SPEAKER_01: Don't tell me that.
SPEAKER_01: Because I'm just saying.
SPEAKER_01: And I was just like, and so I let my daughter shoot that.
SPEAKER_01: And I said, Hey, you want to stop at Decker's?
SPEAKER_01: They have a great grilled chicken sandwich.
SPEAKER_01: So we stopped at Decker's, had lunch, and over lunch, my daughter said, because see, you can't just as a man sacrifice with your with your wife.
SPEAKER_01: Because a lot of times we think, oh, I make all my sacrifices with my wife, and then your kids are like, hey dad, what are you doing?
SPEAKER_01: And you're like, my daughter said, Hey Dad, guess what movie opened this weekend?
SPEAKER_01: Uh it may surprise you to know your dad doesn't keep up with that.
SPEAKER_01: She said, The amazing Spider-Man opened this weekend.
SPEAKER_01: That's all she said.
SPEAKER_01: Because the Bible says to men to live with your wives in an understanding way, you got to understand your kids as well.
SPEAKER_01: So I'm like, I knew what that meant.
SPEAKER_01: What that meant was, Dad, don't make me go back to school not having seen the amazing Spider-Man.
SPEAKER_01: Because all my friends will have seen it and they'll be telling me about it.
SPEAKER_01: I need to be in the know.
SPEAKER_01: And I said, How much homework do you have this weekend?
SPEAKER_01: She says, Well, I got a lot of TNCs for blah, blah, blah.
SPEAKER_01: And I said, Well, here's the deal.
SPEAKER_01: Get all your homework done, and Sunday night, your dad will take you to see the amazing Spider-Man.
SPEAKER_01: By the way, how many Spider-Man movies can you make and it still be amazing?
SPEAKER_01: Help me with that.
SPEAKER_01: Let me guess.
SPEAKER_01: Little guy in red and blue underwear going around shooting webs, and he can beat up some new villain and save the girl.
SPEAKER_01: And I'm gonna lay down 20 bucks tonight to go see that.
SPEAKER_01: And pay$9 for a Coke and$15 for a hot dog.
SPEAKER_01: Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_01: And because my kid likes to go to the Palladium.
SPEAKER_01: They have a fudge factory in a bowling alley.
SPEAKER_01: That's like Cracker Barrel on steroids out there.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna have to sell a kidney on eBay this afternoon to finance this trip.
SPEAKER_01: Now, why am I telling you this?
SPEAKER_01: Because I was like, I gotta go to the grocery store, and then I after preaching three times, and then after that, I get to go see a movie that I don't want to see.
SPEAKER_01: Spider-Man ain't amazing to me.
SPEAKER_01: I'm 49 years old, okay?
SPEAKER_01: That interests me not at all.
SPEAKER_01: But here's the deal, man.
SPEAKER_01: Look at me.
SPEAKER_01: I'm training my daughter what to look for in a husband.
SPEAKER_01: So I want her to know, hey, I want a man that's willing to sacrifice for me.
SPEAKER_01: Because the Bible says, husbands love your wives as Christ love the church and gave himself up for her.
SPEAKER_01: This is all predicated and possible because someone laid down his life for his bride, the church.
SPEAKER_01: Third ingredient to marriage is sanctification.
SPEAKER_01: Look at verse 26.
SPEAKER_01: You still with me?
SPEAKER_01: Verse 26 says, hey, that he loved the church and gave himself up for her.
SPEAKER_01: That's what he did.
SPEAKER_01: Here's why he did it, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she may be holy and without blemish.
SPEAKER_01: Here's one of the mistakes we make in marriage.
SPEAKER_01: We notice something about our spouse, and we don't say anything because we kind of hope that their friends will point that out to them.
SPEAKER_01: And see, here's what happens, ladies.
SPEAKER_01: I don't know if you've kind of noticed.
SPEAKER_01: When a man matures, he isolates.
SPEAKER_01: When a woman matures, she connects.
SPEAKER_01: Let me unpack what I mean.
SPEAKER_01: When a man gets older, you notice your husband doesn't hang out with many men and just do guy stuff, doesn't have that many real close friends the older he gets.
SPEAKER_01: Because when you get older, you got some uh disposable income, you build you a man cave.
SPEAKER_01: And so men will play online video games with people in Scandinavia, but they won't go and have a drink or whatever with their neighbor and get to know him or go outside and say, hey, been living here three years.
SPEAKER_01: Had Match, my name's Bob.
SPEAKER_01: What's your name?
SPEAKER_01: You guys go to church anywhere?
SPEAKER_01: Love for you to come be a part of our church.
SPEAKER_01: It's very laid back.
SPEAKER_01: No, oh, we'll we'll go in there with a headset and we'll connect with strangers on video games.
SPEAKER_01: Uh but when women get older and mature, women love to be together.
SPEAKER_01: Like my wife, and they connect.
SPEAKER_01: My wife will go to dinner.
SPEAKER_01: Like my wife and some of the women on the uh women's ministry team have a planning retreat this weekend.
SPEAKER_01: They're gonna leave on Friday and leave me with my kids.
SPEAKER_01: Such a burden.
SPEAKER_01: Uh and by the way, my wife always apologizes when she leaves me the kids with me.
SPEAKER_01: Man, when's the last time your wife, I mean, ladies, when's the last time your husband apologized to you that, hey, I'm sorry you're having to take care of the kids all day today?
SPEAKER_01: It doesn't happen, does it, ma'am?
SPEAKER_01: She's kind of like, Are you crazy?
SPEAKER_01: Crazy man never says that.
SPEAKER_01: My point is, I always say to my wife, I'm not their babysitter, I'm their dad.
SPEAKER_01: Okay?
SPEAKER_01: Go ahead and leave, and we're gonna have a carnival in this basement when you get back.
SPEAKER_01: Because I'm awesome.
SPEAKER_01: She's like, don't just buy them stuff.
SPEAKER_01: What's wrong with that?
SPEAKER_01: Dad's great, mom, not so much.
SPEAKER_01: Mom's stingy, mom doesn't love you like dad does.
SPEAKER_01: Come on, let's go to Target.
SPEAKER_01: Let's go.
SPEAKER_01: She'll apologize.
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, why are you apologize?
SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
SPEAKER_01: You think I'm mad or something?
SPEAKER_01: No, I just I just but here's the thing they go on that planning retreat, and those women will talk all night about everything in the under the sun.
SPEAKER_01: Much men going to planning retreat.
SPEAKER_01: Come back, Moss said, How was it?
SPEAKER_01: That's great.
SPEAKER_01: We plan the calendar for the next year.
SPEAKER_01: Talk about anything else?
SPEAKER_01: Not really.
SPEAKER_01: They will talk about their hairdressers, their doctors, their kids, everything.
SPEAKER_01: Why?
SPEAKER_01: Because when men get older, we isolate.
SPEAKER_01: When women get older, they just become comfortable themselves and they say, I want to connect.
SPEAKER_01: And so, why do I tell you that?
SPEAKER_01: Because it it sets up this thing that's kind of difficult because you start kind of you hope that your your husband's friends or your wife's friends are going to be a part of the sanctification process.
SPEAKER_01: The Bible says, mm-mm, that's your responsibility.
SPEAKER_01: Let me let me give you a word picture, but before I do, let me say this marriage, one of the big picture purposes of marriage is helping your spouse become who they were created to be.
SPEAKER_01: It's helping your it's preparing your spouse to be who the Bible says God intends them to be all along.
SPEAKER_01: That's why this thing called sanctification needs to happen.
SPEAKER_01: Some of the hardest, hear me now, and most necessary things that have ever been said to me, my wife said to me.
SPEAKER_01: Let me say that again.
SPEAKER_01: Some of the hardest and most necessary things have ever been said to me.
SPEAKER_01: My wife said to me, Now don't think, oh man, is your wife?
SPEAKER_01: No, very gracious person.
SPEAKER_01: Like, for example, some of y'all are like, Well, do you have an example of what you mean by that?
SPEAKER_01: Actually, I do.
SPEAKER_01: When we're dating, when we went to this social gathering where a bunch of couples were and we're leaving, and I'm driving down the road, just kind of thinking, oh man, that was enjoyable.
SPEAKER_01: And I look over and my wife's just looking at me like.
SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, what?
SPEAKER_01: And she goes, sometimes when you're in a social setting, do you ever think, just dial it back and make room for the fact that other people may have something to say?
SPEAKER_01: Here's me.
SPEAKER_01: I'm driving down the road thinking, well, that went well.
SPEAKER_01: And I was like, here's what ought to concern you.
SPEAKER_01: Not that she said that.
SPEAKER_01: Here's what ought to concern you.
SPEAKER_01: My first thought was, really?
SPEAKER_01: And she said, Do you not?
SPEAKER_01: Aren't you aware that you can kind of fill up a room?
SPEAKER_01: And by fill up, I mean dominate.
SPEAKER_01: It's like, never crossed my mind.
SPEAKER_01: And she's like, that is amazing to me.
SPEAKER_01: No one had ever said that to me.
SPEAKER_01: And so it was like a clown on fire.
SPEAKER_01: It was compelling and scary all at the same time.
SPEAKER_01: I didn't know whether to open the door and kick her out going down the road or ask her to marry me right there.
SPEAKER_01: I was just like, huh, hmm, tatonka, tatonka.
SPEAKER_01: But here's what I do know.
SPEAKER_01: I wanted to spend more time with her.
SPEAKER_01: And here's what else she had to say.
SPEAKER_01: So much so that one of my friends said, Hey man, boil it down.
SPEAKER_01: Why'd you marry Marcy?
SPEAKER_01: I said, This is unsexy and selfish.
SPEAKER_01: But I one of the things I love about Marcy, compelling, beautiful, satisfying, intellectually stimulating, just great, oh, just crazy about her.
SPEAKER_01: But she introduced me to a kneel I never knew existed.
SPEAKER_01: Because she said things to me that no one else would say.
SPEAKER_01: And sometimes I would open my mouth and say something like a PNA, write that down.
SPEAKER_01: That's sanctification.
SPEAKER_01: Don't be afraid of that.
SPEAKER_01: And here's why.
SPEAKER_01: Here's the word picture I want to give you.
SPEAKER_01: Look at verse 26.
SPEAKER_01: That he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word.
SPEAKER_01: Hear that again, that he might sanctify her.
SPEAKER_01: This is talking about Jesus and his bride, the church.
SPEAKER_01: He said he gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her.
SPEAKER_01: He got into relationship with his people.
SPEAKER_01: Why?
SPEAKER_01: So that he might sanctify us, having cleansed her by the water, by the washing of water with the word.
SPEAKER_01: What does that mean?
SPEAKER_01: Remember when your kids were babies, were newborn?
SPEAKER_01: Remember the first bath you gave them?
SPEAKER_01: Did anybody go outside with a pressure washer and go, man, this kid's gonna stinky die?
SPEAKER_01: No.
SPEAKER_01: You held it like you're gonna break that thing or something.
SPEAKER_01: And you probably had one of those little plastic tub things and you set them in there and got the water just right.
SPEAKER_01: And we had that Johnson and Johnson lavender baby wash.
SPEAKER_01: That's what God smells like, by the way.
SPEAKER_01: If you want to know what God smells it, he smells like that.
SPEAKER_01: Because we bathed our kids in that from the time we got them home from the hospital till they were, you know, I don't know, in middle school or something.
SPEAKER_01: But and and our kids were fat, by the way, as babies.
SPEAKER_01: Both of them.
SPEAKER_01: Ginormous.
SPEAKER_01: People would come up in public and go, oh, that's a healthy baby.
SPEAKER_01: And my wife, because she's my wife's very nice.
SPEAKER_01: She's like, oh, well, thank you.
SPEAKER_01: And I would just blurt out.
SPEAKER_01: She's saying my kid's fat.
SPEAKER_01: Oh, no, no.
SPEAKER_01: I said, that colostrum, that stuff's addictive.
SPEAKER_01: You gotta watch it.
SPEAKER_01: And they're like, oh, well, oh, oh.
SPEAKER_01: I mean, like both of them, you'd have to pull back their wrist and clean out the crevices right there.
SPEAKER_01: You can find change down in there.
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, dang, we gotta cut this kid off.
SPEAKER_01: What are we doing?
SPEAKER_01: I don't know if people think we feed on demand.
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, I don't care what they think, it's none of their business.
SPEAKER_01: I wish they'd asked me something like that so I could say, none of your business, nosy nelly.
SPEAKER_01: Now shove off.
SPEAKER_01: So what am I saying?
SPEAKER_01: We gave our kids bath.
SPEAKER_01: It was always with the utmost tenderness and gentleness and care.
SPEAKER_01: Why do I tell you that?
SPEAKER_01: Because that's the word picture you need to have for sanctification.
SPEAKER_01: It's not two people getting together and just slicing each other and see who dies of blood loss first.
SPEAKER_01: You should say things to your spouse with that kind of gentleness and intentionality, but also with that much consequence.
SPEAKER_01: That's what the Bible, and he says, hey, sanctification is a part of this.
SPEAKER_01: Let me just read you a couple verses from the Bible that bear out what I'm saying.
SPEAKER_01: This is 1 John chapter 3, verse 2.
SPEAKER_01: It says, Beloved, we are God's children now.
SPEAKER_01: This ought to be in every marriage ceremony.
SPEAKER_01: We're God's children now.
SPEAKER_01: And what we will be has not yet appeared.
SPEAKER_01: In other words, this is who I am, but who I will be has not yet appeared.
SPEAKER_01: And the person you're married to is God's instrument of sanctification to help you become who you will be when he appears without spot or wrinkle or blemish.
SPEAKER_01: He says, We we know, uh, but but we know that when he appears, we shall be like him because we shall see him as he is.
SPEAKER_01: And everyone who thus hopes in him purifies himself as he is pure.
SPEAKER_01: And everyone who thus hopes in, in other words, everyone who has this hope, what do you do?
SPEAKER_01: You purify yourself because God is pure.
SPEAKER_01: Your spouse is the person that knows you, that lives with you, that's seen it all, and doesn't just see it and suffer in silence, but kind of says, Hey, are you are you aware that in social settings, sometimes you just talk too much, you just need to shut up.
SPEAKER_01: Not that I know anybody that's ever said that to their husband.
SPEAKER_01: And by the way, my wife's never spoken to me that harshly.
SPEAKER_01: Now we have been in social settings where she'll look up and kind of go, like, got it.
SPEAKER_01: Thanks, coach.
SPEAKER_01: Light beer from Miller tastes great.
SPEAKER_01: When I'm in a social setting and my wife does this, it means shut your yapper.
SPEAKER_01: Let them talk.
SPEAKER_01: But instead, I'm like, got it.
SPEAKER_01: But every once in a while, when she gives me that, the 10-year-old in me says, Let's just act out.
SPEAKER_01: She can't whip you in public.
SPEAKER_01: Now, see, what's horrible about that, as funny as that is, it is it makes my wife my mom.
SPEAKER_01: And she ain't my mom.
SPEAKER_01: Men, your wife didn't want to be your mom.
SPEAKER_01: Don't make her act like your mom.
SPEAKER_01: It's not her role in your life.
SPEAKER_01: Okay?
SPEAKER_01: But sanctification, that's part of it.
SPEAKER_01: Here's another verse from 2 Corinthians chapter 4, verse 16.
SPEAKER_01: So we do not lose heart.
SPEAKER_01: Just underline that in your in your affections.
SPEAKER_01: Don't lose heart when it comes to your marriage.
SPEAKER_01: We don't lose heart, though our outward self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day.
SPEAKER_01: For the slight momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comprehension, all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen, but to the things that are unseen.
SPEAKER_01: For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.
SPEAKER_01: Ask yourself this question.
SPEAKER_01: I want you to talk about this.
SPEAKER_01: Is your marriage more based on things that are seen or things that are unseen?
SPEAKER_01: Because if your marriage is based on things that are seen, like climbing up the house ladder and getting a bigger house and climbing up the vehicle ladder and getting the car you've always kind of wanted, you can get all of that and hate the marriage that you're in.
SPEAKER_01: See, sanctification says let's base our marriage based on what's unseen, on who we are and who we're becoming.
SPEAKER_01: Love me enough to point things out in my life in a loving way.
SPEAKER_01: And I love you enough to point things out in your life.
SPEAKER_01: Because that's what God says.
SPEAKER_01: Hey, this is a part of all, this should be a part of all marriage relationships.
SPEAKER_01: Fourth thing that's part of marriage is separation.
SPEAKER_01: Separation, look at verse 21.
SPEAKER_01: Not separation like you may think of.
SPEAKER_01: This is what the Bible says.
SPEAKER_01: Jesus says, and Paul says, therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife.
SPEAKER_01: Let me stop right there.
SPEAKER_01: Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother.
SPEAKER_01: When I say separation, that means parents, friends, hobbies, or habits.
SPEAKER_01: Anything that deprioritizes your wife or your husband.
SPEAKER_01: I had a lady say to me one time in counseling, you know, you know, the Bible says that husbands should leave their mother and father and cleave into their wife.
SPEAKER_01: It never says that women should leave their mother and father.
SPEAKER_01: I just looked at the guy and said, Come here, man, let me hold you.
SPEAKER_01: Here's what the Bible says.
SPEAKER_01: The Bible says when you get married, your husband is now the priority over your family of origin.
SPEAKER_01: You don't forget about them, you don't cut them off, but that's your family.
SPEAKER_01: That means when you get married, men, that your wife is now your priority.
SPEAKER_01: Your family, like I say to my family, because every once in a while, my family tries to play the guilt card on me, okay?
SPEAKER_01: They'll call me up, hey, let me hold$500.
SPEAKER_01: It ain't heavy, I can hold the ball by myself.
SPEAKER_01: Well, you know, what kind of brother you are, you're not helping your brother out.
SPEAKER_01: Hey, I got a wife and two kids, two dogs and a cat.
SPEAKER_01: All these people eat every day.
SPEAKER_01: I gotta pay for that.
SPEAKER_01: So don't roll up on me with this guilt.
SPEAKER_01: Oh man, what kind of brother?
SPEAKER_01: You think you're better than me because you're a preacher?
SPEAKER_01: I'm not better than you because I'm a preacher, but when I talk about family, my first responsibility is my wife and two kids.
SPEAKER_01: I got a responsibility of those people over there, but nothing like this right here.
SPEAKER_01: Because here's the thing.
SPEAKER_01: Look at me, we're almost done.
SPEAKER_01: You still with me?
SPEAKER_01: If you don't separate, if you don't leave and cleave.
SPEAKER_01: And by the way, Paul didn't say that's what God said back in Genesis.
SPEAKER_01: God said, for this cause.
SPEAKER_01: When God looked down and saw man and woman, bone of my bone, remember, member uh Adam, this at last is now bone of my bone and flesh in my flesh.
SPEAKER_01: Yay! I got somebody.
SPEAKER_01: Woo! Yes, because I've been naming animals all this time.
SPEAKER_01: Dang, I thought I was going to marry a dolphin, but not now.
SPEAKER_01: This is a naked woman.
SPEAKER_01: All of a sudden, I'm having some thoughts and feelings I didn't have about all them animals.
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
SPEAKER_01: Got up and wrote himself a note.
SPEAKER_01: Remember to sell, take more naps.
SPEAKER_01: He took a nap and he woke up and there's a naked woman there.
SPEAKER_01: If you're single, go home today and try that.
SPEAKER_01: And if you wake up and someone's there, call me.
SPEAKER_01: We'll sell this on the internet.
SPEAKER_01: We'll build that building and a new sanctuary.
SPEAKER_01: Now, what what am I saying?
SPEAKER_01: I'm saying what the Bible says.
SPEAKER_01: Because here's the thing.
SPEAKER_01: If you don't separate, for this cause of man, if you don't separate, what you'll do is you'll still look to your family of origin to meet needs that your spouse is supposed to be meeting.
SPEAKER_01: Sometimes you don't need to pick up the phone, and by the way, did you feel what just happened in here?
SPEAKER_01: Hello?
SPEAKER_01: It kind of got a little still in here.
SPEAKER_01: Some of you are kind of like, did my husband call you?
SPEAKER_01: No, I'm not a jukebox.
SPEAKER_01: I don't preach requests.
SPEAKER_01: I'm just telling you, here's one of the great things about marriage that you look at each other and you just say, We got to get it figured out.
SPEAKER_01: I can't run home to my parents.
SPEAKER_01: You can't run home to your parents.
SPEAKER_01: And yet that it's I mean, that's great.
SPEAKER_01: You got a family of origin.
SPEAKER_01: I'm not saying exclude them.
SPEAKER_01: I'm saying don't depend on them.
SPEAKER_01: Don't depend on them.
SPEAKER_01: Because you got to just look at each other.
SPEAKER_01: Because if you can always go back, and by the way, they're usually gonna side with you.
SPEAKER_01: Have you noticed that about your family?
SPEAKER_01: I wish y'all could see what I see.
SPEAKER_01: Y'all just quit on me right there.
SPEAKER_01: This mule has seen the barn.
SPEAKER_01: Some of you are like, hey, you can be done now.
SPEAKER_01: And go.
SPEAKER_01: Hey.
SPEAKER_01: Your family's great, but again, if you keep looking to your family to meet needs, so your husband and your wife should be looking, should be meeting.
SPEAKER_01: Your husband and wife never has to be who God's called them to be.
SPEAKER_01: See, part of the sanctification process is separating, looking at your spouse and saying, It's me and you, Skippy.
SPEAKER_01: We got to get this sorted.
SPEAKER_01: We've got me going to mama's and meeting your parents at the lake house every other weekend.
SPEAKER_01: Sometimes you and I just need to be alone for the weekend and ask ourselves this question.
SPEAKER_01: Hey, we're married.
SPEAKER_01: Why are we bored when we're together?
SPEAKER_01: Why do we got nothing to talk about?
SPEAKER_01: Why are we most happy when we're with other people?
SPEAKER_01: That's not healthy.
SPEAKER_01: The Bible says separation.
SPEAKER_01: So here's another question I want you to ask each other this week.
SPEAKER_01: Is there anybody or anything in my life that you think is a bigger priority than you?
SPEAKER_01: Why don't you look your husband in the eye?
SPEAKER_01: I want you to look your wife in the eye and say, is there anybody or anything in my life that you feel like is a bigger priority?
SPEAKER_01: Well, if I don't agree, it doesn't matter if you agree, it doesn't matter if I agree.
SPEAKER_01: If I because I'll ask my wife that today.
SPEAKER_01: And if my wife says, Yeah, I think this is, then that whatever that is, that's gotta go.
SPEAKER_01: Why?
SPEAKER_01: Because for this cause, man shall leave his mother and father and cleave into his wife.
SPEAKER_01: Here's the last part.
SPEAKER_01: Thing that belongs to every marriage relationship is sex.
SPEAKER_01: Some people walked out after this past service and said, Thanks, we're not gonna go have the talk with our kids.
SPEAKER_01: I say, Hey, I'm not trying to be inappropriate.
SPEAKER_01: Here's what the Bible says.
SPEAKER_01: You still with me?
SPEAKER_01: We're just about done.
SPEAKER_01: It says, Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother, hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.
SPEAKER_01: And the two shall become one flesh.
SPEAKER_01: Now, if you're a student, let me talk to you in this room, okay?
SPEAKER_01: Just for a second.
SPEAKER_01: You're like, please don't say that word and my parents in the same sentence because I will throw up in my mouth.
SPEAKER_01: I'm not talking about your parents.
SPEAKER_01: I am talking about, but I'm but I'm also talking about you.
SPEAKER_01: Some of you are like, I'm 13, you're old enough to hear this and understand it.
SPEAKER_01: We don't practice being inappropriate from the pulpit here.
SPEAKER_01: But let me tell you something.
SPEAKER_01: Here's what you should do.
SPEAKER_01: You should, I'm fixing to read a verse out of the Bible, and then we're gonna be done.
SPEAKER_01: You should hear this, and it should just take a lot of teenage temptation off the shelf for you.
SPEAKER_01: You should you should hear this and kind of go, you know what?
SPEAKER_01: My God is so creative and so faithful, he has designed a place and a person with whom and and and and and and and and when with that person I can experience all that.
SPEAKER_01: Therefore, I can just look at anybody that comes at me now and say, you know what, that's just not a part of my life.
SPEAKER_01: Because I believe the gospel.
SPEAKER_01: He said, What do you mean?
SPEAKER_01: Here's what the Bible says.
SPEAKER_01: Because I have friends that are always like, hey, I bet as a preacher, you kind of like, I mean, I don't know if you're prudish and stuff.
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, prudish?
SPEAKER_01: What'd you say?
SPEAKER_01: I said, the Bible talks about sex in ways that make you blush.
SPEAKER_01: Well, I doubt that.
SPEAKER_01: You know, I'll put it around the block a time or two.
SPEAKER_01: And I told one of them not long ago, I said, the Bible says the marriage bed is pure and undefiled.
SPEAKER_01: What does that mean?
SPEAKER_01: Imagine you not understand words like pure and undefiled.
SPEAKER_01: The Bible says when you get married, when it comes to this issue, you can do whatever you and your partner enjoy doing.
SPEAKER_01: And he's like, Where's that in the Bible?
SPEAKER_01: Can you write that down?
SPEAKER_01: I'll take it home to my old lady.
SPEAKER_01: I'm not gonna write that down because if you relate to her as your old lady, I bet she's not real warm to the idea of being with you.
SPEAKER_01: Or, you know, it's just a figure of speech.
SPEAKER_01: No, it's a revelation of your heart.
SPEAKER_01: And we just stared at each other.
SPEAKER_01: And I enjoy just staring back at people.
SPEAKER_01: You just refer to your wife as your old lady.
SPEAKER_01: I mean, come on.
SPEAKER_01: What does the Bible say?
SPEAKER_01: Just let me just read this and we'll be done.
SPEAKER_01: This is 1 Corinthians chapter 7.
SPEAKER_01: The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights.
SPEAKER_01: You need me to explain that?
SPEAKER_01: Y'all are like, please, Hammer, don't hurt us.
SPEAKER_01: The wife should give to her, excuse me, the husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband, for the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does.
SPEAKER_01: Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
SPEAKER_01: Do not deprive one another except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, but then come together again so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
SPEAKER_01: Translation, the Bible says this about sex and marriage.
SPEAKER_01: It should be frequent and it should be mutually satisfying.
SPEAKER_01: He says, Hey, unless you've, hey, don't put each other off except for a short time, and that for the purpose of prayer.
SPEAKER_01: So here's some of you men, this is all you've heard.
SPEAKER_01: You're writing right now.
SPEAKER_01: You turn to your neighbor.
SPEAKER_01: Hey, give me ball that pen just for a second.
SPEAKER_01: You're gonna go home today, walk it on your wife.
SPEAKER_01: Are you praying?
SPEAKER_01: Because I heard this morning that guy said, you know, except for the cause of prayer.
SPEAKER_01: Here's the thing.
SPEAKER_01: Let me just say this.
SPEAKER_01: And I stand on this, okay?
SPEAKER_01: And by the way, some of you, I mean the stereotype is that's all men are all about, blah, blah, blah.
SPEAKER_01: Some of you men aren't sexual enough in your relationship with your wife.
SPEAKER_01: You feel that?
SPEAKER_01: I'm just kind of like, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo.
SPEAKER_01: And here's why.
SPEAKER_01: Because you know that the submission and the sacrifice and the sanctification and stuff isn't there.
SPEAKER_01: So the thought about initiating intimacy with your wife, you're kind of like, who are we kidding, man?
SPEAKER_01: Come on, let's just make the most of this.
SPEAKER_01: You've lost heart.
SPEAKER_01: You need to get heart for your marriage relationship.
SPEAKER_01: I don't get into people's business.
SPEAKER_01: It's none of my business how this works itself out, but I'm saying it.
SPEAKER_01: God says, and by the way, it's last on the list for a reason.
SPEAKER_01: Because if you're if you're if you're doing the whole submission thing, if you've got two people that are full of the Spirit and their heart, it's like there's a carnival going on.
SPEAKER_01: They're just they're just singing and making melody in their hearts to God.
SPEAKER_01: They're just like, oh, this is so good.
SPEAKER_01: So when they come to each other, it's like submission, not a problem.
SPEAKER_01: I want you to be the man God's called you to be and the man that I need you to be.
SPEAKER_01: They're the same person.
SPEAKER_01: Sacrifice, absolutely.
SPEAKER_01: Those who lead should be the first to sacrifice for the sake, for the betterment, for the enjoyment of those they lead.
SPEAKER_01: That means tonight, at some ungodly hour, my 16-year-old will be like, You ready?
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, it's 11:30.
SPEAKER_01: It's a school night.
SPEAKER_01: Oh, but dad, you said.
SPEAKER_01: And all of a sudden, like a phoenix from the ashes, I'll be like, Let's go.
SPEAKER_01: Because I want my kids to know when my dad says something, it's gonna happen.
SPEAKER_01: Separation.
SPEAKER_01: See, all this other stuff creates, let me say this when I'm done.
SPEAKER_01: All these other things, these first four things, create an environment where you getting your physical needs met is just a natural phenomenon.
SPEAKER_01: It just creates that environment.
SPEAKER_01: Where this last one just happens consistently and in a mutually enjoyable way.
SPEAKER_01: That's the way God set it up.
SPEAKER_01: That's what we mean when we talk about the content of marriage.
SPEAKER_01: Stand to your feet.
SPEAKER_01: Let me speak a blessing over you.
SPEAKER_01: Hold your hands out.
SPEAKER_01: May the Lord bless you and keep you and cause his face to shine upon you.
SPEAKER_01: And may you understand that one of the means by which God arranged for that to happen is through your spouse.
SPEAKER_01: So that we depart now and bless and keep each other in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.
SPEAKER_01: Amen.
SPEAKER_01: Bless you, you're dismissed.