SPEAKER_00: This podcast is brought to you by Grant Parkway Fabio.
SPEAKER_00: Helping people to know, enjoy, and glorify God.
SPEAKER_00: For more information about Grand Parkway, visit GrandParkway.org.
SPEAKER_01: Good morning, Grant Parkway.
SPEAKER_01: While you're standing, can I ask you to join me in a word of prayer?
SPEAKER_01: Father, thank you for the gift of song and how you use music to till the soil of our hearts.
SPEAKER_01: So when the seed of the word goes forth, it can actually take root.
SPEAKER_01: And so my ask this morning, God, is that those songs would be more than songs, but that they would be a catalyst from you such that we're different.
SPEAKER_01: God, I pray today that by your spirit you will unsettle us such that we actually see ourselves as men and women who have work to do.
SPEAKER_01: And we don't work to get your approval.
SPEAKER_01: We work because we have your approval in Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: So, Holy Spirit, this is your time.
SPEAKER_01: We are your people.
SPEAKER_01: We ask that you would speak now, that we would be better because of the time invested this morning.
SPEAKER_01: In the name of Jesus, the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords, we pray.
SPEAKER_01: And all those who agree said amen.
SPEAKER_01: Amen.
SPEAKER_01: Go ahead and be seated in the presence of the living God.
SPEAKER_01: Well, thank you all for the privilege, the hospitality, the warmth that has been extended to me.
SPEAKER_01: My name is Malcolm Marshall.
SPEAKER_01: I have the privilege of serving as the campus pastor at the Siena campus of Houston's first.
SPEAKER_01: And I have to say from the jump, I love your pastor.
SPEAKER_01: I love Pastor Neil because he's a straight shooter.
SPEAKER_01: He makes it real clear where he is and where he's not.
SPEAKER_01: And I appreciate that.
SPEAKER_01: And so I know that you all sitting under his leadership are a blessed people.
SPEAKER_01: And I kind of privilege to be here knowing that you can't just have anybody speaking to the flock you've been entrusted with.
SPEAKER_01: And so I don't take this lightly.
SPEAKER_01: I kind of privilege to be here with you today.
SPEAKER_01: Well, friends, I want to start with a little illustration.
SPEAKER_01: So when I was a kid, uh my younger brother and I used to play this real silly game where we would see who could hold their breath the longest.
SPEAKER_01: Why boys do stuff like that, I don't know.
SPEAKER_01: But we would see who could hold their breath the longest.
SPEAKER_01: And me being a little older than him, two years older, I had a little bit more lung capacity, and I knew he would never beat me.
SPEAKER_01: So one day we're playing this game and I black out.
SPEAKER_01: I'm just like, bye! And my brother's like, Wake up, wake up.
SPEAKER_01: I finally come to, and I'm like, yeah, we're not playing that game anymore.
SPEAKER_01: We're not doing that anymore.
SPEAKER_01: Well, believe it or not, I'm gonna ask you to do something similar today.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna ask you to breathe.
SPEAKER_01: As a matter of fact, that is what I want to talk about today.
SPEAKER_01: Exhaling to freedom, this idea of breathing.
SPEAKER_01: We're gonna be in the book of Genesis, chapter 33, verses 1 through 4.
SPEAKER_01: And before we get there, I want to kind of set the course of where we're going and tell you a little bit of a personal story as to why this notion of I me wanting to challenge you to breathe today.
SPEAKER_01: Many of us in this room are harboring unforgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: And it's just like holding your breath, expecting no consequences.
SPEAKER_01: This became personal for me in my early 20s when I'm at work one day and I get a phone call that my father had been murdered.
SPEAKER_01: My father and I didn't have a good relationship.
SPEAKER_01: As a matter of fact, I had a very ungodly disdain toward my dad because I felt like because he abandoned our family, we struggled.
SPEAKER_01: And the gravity of my sin didn't manifest itself until the Lord showed me, regardless of what you think of him, he's still the dad through whom I brought you.
SPEAKER_01: So I'm resting, I'm in this tug of war because I've got this animosity toward my dad, but I'm also having to reconcile he's gone.
SPEAKER_01: And there's nothing I can do in this moment to navigate through this in a way that didn't have me internally in knots.
SPEAKER_01: Well, I want to talk to you about how God used that process to bring me to this place of learning how to breathe again.
SPEAKER_01: Exhaling to freedom, no longer harboring unforgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: And I want to put my cards on the table from the very beginning.
SPEAKER_01: What I'm going to present to you today is difficult.
SPEAKER_01: Someone may have said something or done something that intentionally hurt you.
SPEAKER_01: They may have violated your trust.
SPEAKER_01: You may be still dealing with the ripple effects of it even here today.
SPEAKER_01: And that's why you want the power of the living God to move through you with this subject, because apart from Christ, you can't change this.
SPEAKER_01: You will be a slave to this unforgiveness until the Lord calls you home, unless you're willing to put in the work.
SPEAKER_01: So today, I'm asking you to put in the work.
SPEAKER_01: I'm asking you to get on that bench press, put some 45s on the end of it, and let's go to work.
SPEAKER_01: Again, it's not easy, but it's necessary.
SPEAKER_01: I want to start with a working definition of exhaling to freedom.
SPEAKER_01: I'm also going to synonymously say extending true forgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: Exhaling to freedom or extending true forgiveness is willingly giving up the right to punish someone even when they deserve it.
SPEAKER_01: Willingly giving up the right to punish someone even when they deserve punishment.
SPEAKER_01: The Bible actually has a lot to say about forgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: As a matter of fact, I'm gonna put a host of different verses on the screens so that you can see some of these different verses.
SPEAKER_01: In Hosea chapter 3, verses 1 through 5, the prophet Hosea is challenged to forgive his unfaithful wife Gomer.
SPEAKER_01: And in doing so, he sought reconciliation at the expense of his own humiliation.
SPEAKER_01: In Matthew chapter 18, verses 21 through 35, Jesus gives the parable of the unforgiving servant, and he shows very clearly what happens when you choose not to forgive.
SPEAKER_01: In Luke chapter 15, verses 11 through 32, Jesus shares the parable of the Father who welcomes home his wayward prodigal son, extending forgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: And there are a host of other verses on there, but I want to give you the common thread which weaves all of these verses together.
SPEAKER_01: If you're taking notes, you want to jot this down or maybe get a screenshot of these different truths.
SPEAKER_01: The common thread which weaves these verses together originates here.
SPEAKER_01: Number one, the power of forgiveness is the only power you have over anyone who hurts you.
SPEAKER_01: Number two, forgiveness is the only response that will keep you from becoming a victim of bitterness.
SPEAKER_01: Number three, the longer you wait to forgive, the less likely you are to actually do it.
SPEAKER_01: If you've been forgiven in Christ, there's an expectation that God will use you to be an extension of that forgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: So I want to draw your attention to the scriptures.
SPEAKER_01: We're gonna look at some verses that we get to see this played out.
SPEAKER_01: Genesis chapter 33, verses 1 through 4.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna read the verses and then kind of come back and give a little bit of background, and then we will dig into them a little bit.
SPEAKER_01: So Genesis 33, chapter, chapter 33, verses 1 through 4, if you'll join me there.
SPEAKER_01: The word of God reads as follows.
SPEAKER_01: Jacob, now Jacob looked up and saw Esau coming toward him with 400 men.
SPEAKER_01: So he divided the children among Leah, Rachel, and the two female slaves.
SPEAKER_01: He put the female slaves and their children first, Leah and her children next, and Rachel and Joseph last.
SPEAKER_01: He himself went on ahead and bowed to the ground seven times until he approached his brother.
SPEAKER_01: But Esau ran to meet him, hugged him, threw his arms around him, and kissed him.
SPEAKER_01: Then they wept.
SPEAKER_01: All right, so let's reflect on these words.
SPEAKER_01: Let me give you a little bit of background.
SPEAKER_01: Let's go back a few chapters.
SPEAKER_01: Genesis 25.
SPEAKER_01: Y'all remember Father Abraham?
SPEAKER_01: Father Abraham had many sons.
SPEAKER_01: Come on.
SPEAKER_01: And his son had y'all got it.
SPEAKER_01: So Father Abraham, his son of promise was Isaac.
SPEAKER_01: Isaac was 60 years old when him and his wife had twins.
SPEAKER_01: They had two boys.
SPEAKER_01: The older, his name was Esau, and the Hebrew construction of his name sounds like the word Harry, not H-A-R-R-Y, H-A-I-R-Y.
SPEAKER_01: The younger son, his name was Jacob.
SPEAKER_01: And his name in Hebrew sounds like the word heel, like the heel of your foot.
SPEAKER_01: And these two boys were as different as the day is long.
SPEAKER_01: Esau, the older, was a hunter.
SPEAKER_01: He was an outdoorsman.
SPEAKER_01: He liked to be out and about shooting stuff, bringing home game.
SPEAKER_01: Just he was, he was, he was like, uh, y'all see those uh Slim Jim commercials with the Sasquatch?
SPEAKER_01: That's kind of what I envisioned with Esau.
SPEAKER_01: He was kind of that guy.
SPEAKER_01: But Jacob, he was a homebody.
SPEAKER_01: Jacob, Jacob was at the house.
SPEAKER_01: He was at the house chilling.
SPEAKER_01: That's just Jacob.
SPEAKER_01: He's at the house chilling.
SPEAKER_01: Well, one day, Esau goes on one of his little expeditions.
SPEAKER_01: He's hunting, and clearly he doesn't find anything because he comes home and he's talking about how hungry he is.
SPEAKER_01: Well, younger brother Jacob is at the house and he's actually cooked up a batch of some good stew.
SPEAKER_01: So the older brother coming in there, like, little brother, this is not in the text, this is kind of how I see it.
SPEAKER_01: Little brother, give me something to eat.
SPEAKER_01: Jacob, he's like, Yeah, I got you.
SPEAKER_01: I'll give you some of this stew if you give me your birthright.
SPEAKER_01: The birthright was given to the eldest son as a double portion of the family's estate.
SPEAKER_01: So this young man, matter of fact, uh verse 32 of Genesis 25, matter of fact, let me read it to you.
SPEAKER_01: Verse 32 of Genesis 25, Esau actually says, What good will this birthright be to me if I starve to death?
SPEAKER_01: He was so hungry, he was willing to cash in his future to meet a present need.
SPEAKER_01: Harboring unforgiveness is short-term with long-term consequences.
SPEAKER_01: So he's willing to give up this birthright.
SPEAKER_01: He was like, man, I don't, I, I, I'm so hungry, I'm willing to do that.
SPEAKER_01: And it's because he didn't understand the value of it.
SPEAKER_01: Well, these verses we just read in Genesis 33, 1 through 4, we're actually gonna see their first time meeting 20 years after this episode.
SPEAKER_01: Okay?
SPEAKER_01: Let me go back to verses 1 and 2.
SPEAKER_01: I want to read them again and then I want to unpack them a little bit.
SPEAKER_01: Genesis 33, one and two.
SPEAKER_01: Now Jacob looked up, saw Esau coming toward him with 400 men.
SPEAKER_01: He divided the children among Leah, Rachel, and the two female slaves.
SPEAKER_01: He put the female slaves and their children first, Leah and their children next, and Rachel and Joseph last.
SPEAKER_01: All right, so everything that Joseph, or excuse me, that Jacob had been living for was coming down to this one point, this reunion with his brother.
SPEAKER_01: 20 years, y'all.
SPEAKER_01: Twenty years.
SPEAKER_01: He goes and he is really under the impression that his brother is about to whoop his head.
SPEAKER_01: You stole my birthright.
SPEAKER_01: That's why he was concerned about the 400 men.
SPEAKER_01: He thought, oh man, this dude is finna put in work.
SPEAKER_01: He got 400 of his buddies, they're about to put me in the ground.
SPEAKER_01: So that's why he ordered his family the way he did.
SPEAKER_01: He was aligning them in a pattern to protect himself.
SPEAKER_01: He looks out, and there's actually another caveat to this that needs to be shared.
SPEAKER_01: So if you go back one chapter, Genesis 32, Esau, actually, Jacob does three different things preceding this meeting.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna tell you what those three things are.
SPEAKER_01: One, first, he sent messengers to Esau with a report of how life had gone over the last 20 years, and he asked for a request for favor.
SPEAKER_01: The second thing he did was he prayed and he asked God to deliver him from Esau's rage.
SPEAKER_01: And then number three, he sent a bunch of gifts.
SPEAKER_01: Matter of fact, he did that a couple of different times as a way of trying to appease his brother.
SPEAKER_01: Now, I find it interesting that as opposed to seeking forgiveness, he did all this other stuff.
SPEAKER_01: Matter of fact, let's just put it on the table.
SPEAKER_01: He was trying to butter his brother up so that, in his words, the rays that Esau was gonna bring to the table wouldn't fall on him.
SPEAKER_01: And I find it ironic that this is also during the time, those 20 years, Jacob had actually been in a process with the Lord where he was being transformed from a control freak to a man who was learning to trust God.
SPEAKER_01: This is significant because Jacob's name also means trickster or supplanter, deceiver.
SPEAKER_01: So he's living out his name right now, y'all.
SPEAKER_01: Here's the thing: every time you trust God, you're saying goodbye to control and hello to uncertainty.
SPEAKER_01: And God wants us to know today that when you harbor unforgiveness against an individual, or if you're like Jacob, trying to manipulate people to get the forgiveness you need, that's sin.
SPEAKER_01: James chapter 4, verse 17 says it very clearly if you know what to do and don't do it, that is sin.
SPEAKER_01: So he's trying to, he's trying to manipulate things.
SPEAKER_01: He's trying to have his perception before his brother such that, oh no, it's cool.
SPEAKER_01: You got I gave you the gifts.
SPEAKER_01: You know, I sent the messengers in front.
SPEAKER_01: We talked, you know, we're good.
SPEAKER_01: But it's all rooted in the fact that he didn't understand when there's a breach in a relationship, there's something that has to happen before forgiveness can begin.
SPEAKER_01: And if you're taking notes, this is the first key takeaway I want to give you.
SPEAKER_01: Exhaling to freedom or extending true forgiveness begins when we acknowledge our sin.
SPEAKER_01: Not when we make excuses for it, not when we dance around it, not when we use flowery wording, when we acknowledge our sin.
SPEAKER_01: And at this point, Jacob hadn't done that.
SPEAKER_01: At this point, he had not acknowledged his sin because his actions are very clear that he's leaning more into his ability or his works than he is his faith.
SPEAKER_01: You don't send gifts in front of you as a measure of I am going to do the right thing because it's going to make everything better.
SPEAKER_01: He did that because he didn't want his brother to knock his head in.
SPEAKER_01: When it comes to forgiveness, if we're going to extend true forgiveness, we must remember our faith and our works are not the same thing.
SPEAKER_01: Our way, our works should be an outflow of our faith, but our works are not a substitute for our faith.
SPEAKER_01: We don't do things for God to get God's favor or approval.
SPEAKER_01: We do things for God because we've got God's favor or approval in Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: If you get those twisted, though, you might be doing stuff for God at the expense of God.
SPEAKER_01: Jacob got his wires crossed.
SPEAKER_01: The inability to acknowledge our sin is an insight into our own character.
SPEAKER_01: And as it relates to forgiveness, the unforgiving heart is the playground of the evil one.
SPEAKER_01: So we're gonna see now in verse 3 some character development start to take shape and play out in Jacob.
SPEAKER_01: Genesis 33, verse 3.
SPEAKER_01: The scriptures say he himself went on ahead and bowed to the ground seven times until he approached his brother.
SPEAKER_01: So with this gesture, we're seeing a little bit of humility start to come to the forefront.
SPEAKER_01: He he before he approaches his brother, he bows down seven times and he's expressing sorrow with this action that he wronged his brother.
SPEAKER_01: Whether you need forgiveness or whether you're the one who needs to extend forgiveness, it's always an attitude that results in an action.
SPEAKER_01: Extending true forgiveness, exhaling to freedom always starts with an attitude that becomes an action.
SPEAKER_01: So if you could put it another way, it can't be about what you say, it's gotta be about what you do.
SPEAKER_01: You can say all day, I love Jesus, but if you live like you don't know Jesus, people are gonna question if you really love Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: The actions and the words have to be in alignment because our behavior actually exemplifies what we really think.
SPEAKER_01: And so here's the here's the real, here's a nugget in verse three.
SPEAKER_01: That phrasing there, bowing to the ground.
SPEAKER_01: In the original Hebrew, that is the word Shekha.
SPEAKER_01: It's where we get our word worship.
SPEAKER_01: So he bows before his brother, not as if his brother was some sort of deity.
SPEAKER_01: He bowed because he understood that worship should precede anything we do if we're gonna do it as an act unto the Lord.
SPEAKER_01: Here's your next key takeaway if you're taking notes.
SPEAKER_01: Exhaling to freedom or extending true forgiveness is always internal before it's external.
SPEAKER_01: God's gotta do some work in us that he might manifest himself through us.
SPEAKER_01: Jacob is modeling that for us here today, and because God did some work, there should be an outflow of what that work looks like.
SPEAKER_01: That's one of the reasons why, whenever I have the privilege of leading someone to Jesus, one of the very first things I tell them is now that God is yours in Christ, you need to go tell somebody what happened.
SPEAKER_01: Because if he's done something in you, it's gotta make its way out of you.
SPEAKER_01: Can I just come down your street for just a minute?
SPEAKER_01: Let me just bowl down your alley.
SPEAKER_01: If God's done something in you, it's gotta make its way out of you.
SPEAKER_01: We're talking about forgiveness today.
SPEAKER_01: Friends, if there is forgiveness in your heart that you are withholding, you need to understand that actually works against you, not for you.
SPEAKER_01: Jacob had to learn the hard way.
SPEAKER_01: Wrestling with God, getting his hip knocked out of socket.
SPEAKER_01: You know the Lord does love us enough that he will get after us if we know what to do, but we choose not to do it.
SPEAKER_01: Jacob here is an example of what happens when our faith makes its way outward.
SPEAKER_01: And one of the reasons why this is so important is Jesus knows that forgiveness is generally the first step in the way of reconciliation with Him.
SPEAKER_01: Because when our stuff with the Lord is right, when our vertical is right, our horizontal is right.
SPEAKER_01: But if your vertical ain't right, your horizontal is gonna be toe up from the flow up.
SPEAKER_01: If your relationship with God is not what it needs to be, scratch this.
SPEAKER_01: But if this is right, you're in a much better position for this to be right.
SPEAKER_01: That's inward work making its way outward.
SPEAKER_01: Jacob saw this, and the internal work pushed its way outward.
SPEAKER_01: The last thing I want to show you is in verse 4, and we're gonna actually see this outward expression of forgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: In verse 4, the scriptures say, But Esau, but Esau ran to meet him, hugged him, threw his arms around him, and kissed him, and they wept.
SPEAKER_01: I find that interesting language because it sounds very much like what the prodigal son's dad did when he met his son.
SPEAKER_01: He he met him, he hugged him, he threw his arms around him, he kissed him, they wept.
SPEAKER_01: That's not something you do with somebody that you're about to knock their head in with.
SPEAKER_01: So, what's going on?
SPEAKER_01: Well, Esau didn't want revenge.
SPEAKER_01: As a matter of fact, this became a family reunion of sorts.
SPEAKER_01: Again, 20 years have passed.
SPEAKER_01: Lots had changed.
SPEAKER_01: Forgiving sets both sides free from the negative bonds that forgive, that that happened, because here it is.
SPEAKER_01: When you forgive, you can control the one thing, the one thing you can control, and that's namely you.
SPEAKER_01: When you forgive, you focus on what you can control.
SPEAKER_01: That's you.
SPEAKER_01: You can't control what they do.
SPEAKER_01: When my dad died, I couldn't control the fact that I was no longer in a situation where I could actually talk to him about some of the issues that were on my heart.
SPEAKER_01: But I can control how I respond.
SPEAKER_01: Here in verse 4, there are some points I want to bring out.
SPEAKER_01: And before we get there, I'm going to say it this way.
SPEAKER_01: In our culture, we have a really faulty, really tainted view of what it means to forgive.
SPEAKER_01: We tend to think that to forgive somebody is to be weak.
SPEAKER_01: And can I tell you, if you're in Jesus, you can't forgive and be weak because your flesh won't let you.
SPEAKER_01: Now, if you're not in Jesus, you need to be in Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: That's first.
SPEAKER_01: But two, being able to forgive doesn't make you weak.
SPEAKER_01: It actually makes you meek.
SPEAKER_01: I'm going to explain the difference between those two words here in just a moment, but I want to go on record and say that most of us don't understand forgiveness because the bottom line is forgiveness always costs somebody something, and we don't want to be the one paying.
SPEAKER_01: We don't want to be the one feeling like, well, man, I gave in.
SPEAKER_01: That's pride.
SPEAKER_01: We don't want to be the one feeling like, well, you know, they should have came to me first.
SPEAKER_01: That's rooted in something that's not of God.
SPEAKER_01: Forgiveness always requires us to give something.
SPEAKER_01: I had a mentor tell me once, harboring unforgiveness is like drinking poison but expecting the other person to die.
SPEAKER_01: Because it doesn't mess with them.
SPEAKER_01: They're going on about their business, but you the one feeling it.
SPEAKER_01: Let me give you some examples.
SPEAKER_01: Let me give you some real life examples.
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna have this information on the screen.
SPEAKER_01: I've got some research that suggests holding a grudge against another person who's wounded you, it actually impairs your ability to move forward.
SPEAKER_01: It actually slowly destroys your health.
SPEAKER_01: Here are a couple of ways that it does that.
SPEAKER_01: Harboring unforgiveness, it raises the levels of stress hormones in our bloodstream.
SPEAKER_01: It can elevate our blood pressure.
SPEAKER_01: It can contribute to weight gain.
SPEAKER_01: It affects our ability to focus and form new memories.
SPEAKER_01: And this is because all those negative emotions release deadly toxins into your bloodstream, and over time, your body feels the effects of that.
SPEAKER_01: Another study showed that people who held a grudge of unforgiveness, they viewed physical tasks as more demanding.
SPEAKER_01: Unforgiveness kills your productivity.
SPEAKER_01: It accelerates the aging process.
SPEAKER_01: It can contribute to anxiety, depression, heart disease, arthritis, and ultimately it robs your life of any zest.
SPEAKER_01: Unforgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: Forgiveness, on the other hand, it wipes the slate clean because it reverses much of those same problems.
SPEAKER_01: People who forgive experience increased self-esteem, reduced anxiety, as well as measurable improvements in psychological health.
SPEAKER_01: But here's the catch.
SPEAKER_01: Forgiveness isn't a one-time, leave-it-all-behind moment.
SPEAKER_01: It's an ongoing process.
SPEAKER_01: It's a continual thing.
SPEAKER_01: Scientists tell us, can we go to the next slide, please?
SPEAKER_01: Scientists tell us that our brains can't forgive people who've hurt us until we, four things, four things.
SPEAKER_01: I want you to get these four things.
SPEAKER_01: If you don't get anything else we said today, this is something you'll want to get a screenshot of or jot this down.
SPEAKER_01: Four things that have to happen.
SPEAKER_01: One, we have to grieve the pain we've experienced.
SPEAKER_01: Number two, we've got to work to understand the perspective of our abuser.
SPEAKER_01: And the reason we want to do that is because it allows us to actually be more gracious toward them.
SPEAKER_01: We might not agree with why they did what they did, but when you understand it from their vantage point, it allows you to be more gracious.
SPEAKER_01: Number three, we have to decide to forgive.
SPEAKER_01: That's it, y'all.
SPEAKER_01: We have to decide to forgive.
SPEAKER_01: We have to make a decision that I will not be held in bondage to this unforgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: And then we have to work toward some level of acceptance or compassion toward the one who wounded us.
SPEAKER_01: Here's the million million million dollar statement for this morning.
SPEAKER_01: You can't forgive and forget.
SPEAKER_01: Our brains don't work that way, but you can learn to move on without wishing harm on the one who harmed you.
SPEAKER_01: That's freedom, y'all.
SPEAKER_01: That's freedom.
SPEAKER_01: And in Christ we are free.
SPEAKER_01: Here's our last key takeaway.
SPEAKER_01: Exhaling the freedom or extending true forgiveness, it equates to meekness, not weakness.
SPEAKER_01: The difference between the two is that a weak person, they choose not to forgive.
SPEAKER_01: But a meek person, they choose to forgive even when they don't want to.
SPEAKER_01: Even when they don't want to.
SPEAKER_01: So a couple of questions that before I wrap this up.
SPEAKER_01: Are you tied to the past through the umbilical cord of unforgiveness?
SPEAKER_01: If so, I want to ask you today, let's allow God's spirit to be shears to cut that thing.
SPEAKER_01: That we might be disconnected from it.
SPEAKER_01: Because when you forgive, you sever that cord.
SPEAKER_01: When you don't forgive, you allow the evil one to wage war on you with things like anger, frustration, retaliation, hostility, revenge, and you can be tied to that memory so long, it manifests in ways that you can't point it back to its original root.
SPEAKER_01: I counsel enough people to know a lot of stuff that happens as you become an adult, as you grow up, is rooted in stuff that can point back to when you were younger that you never dealt with.
SPEAKER_01: The seed of unforgiveness will bring forth some fruit, and trust me, it will not be God honoring.
SPEAKER_01: Now, maybe your situation is like mine.
SPEAKER_01: Maybe there's someone you need to forgive that they're not here anymore, or you don't have any communication with them, you can't connect with them.
SPEAKER_01: Here's what I want to tell you.
SPEAKER_01: It takes two to reconcile, but it only takes one to forgive.
SPEAKER_01: Takes two people to reconcile, but it only takes one to forgive.
SPEAKER_01: I can't reconcile with my dad, but I can certainly walk in the forgiveness God has given me in Christ, and so can you.
SPEAKER_01: If indeed we're gonna be the people God has called us to be, then we need to know that we extend forgiveness because we have received it.
SPEAKER_01: And it is hypocritical of us to receive God's grace day in, day out, and yet hoard it like it's not good for anybody else.
SPEAKER_01: Every person in this place, every person watching is a recipient of God's grace.
SPEAKER_01: If you still got warm blood running through your body, if you can breathe, if you can think clearly, that's grace all over you.
SPEAKER_01: And because God's been gracious, he expects that of us.
SPEAKER_01: Let's bring it down to brass tags.
SPEAKER_01: When Jesus died for us, according to Romans chapter 5, most of us weren't thinking about him.
SPEAKER_01: That's grace, that's forgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: God wants us to be a conduit of that same forgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: So I got a few closing thoughts, and then I'm gonna give you a quick video illustration to kind of bring everything together.
SPEAKER_01: A couple of closing thoughts.
SPEAKER_01: Number one, who are you holding hostage with unforgiveness?
SPEAKER_01: I want you to get their picture in your mind.
SPEAKER_01: I want you to, I want it to maybe unsettle you a little bit.
SPEAKER_01: Who are you holding hostage?
SPEAKER_01: Once you get that picture, here's what I want to ask you to do: consider everything I've presented to you this day as a hostage negotiation.
SPEAKER_01: Let them go.
SPEAKER_01: Let them go for your benefit.
SPEAKER_01: Let them go.
SPEAKER_01: You've got more to gain than you got more to gain than by continuing in that path.
SPEAKER_01: And as a sidebar, if indeed there's someone particular or or specific situation that the Lord is just really weighing on you about, guess what?
SPEAKER_01: That's the one the Lord wants you to deal with.
SPEAKER_01: Who are you holding hostage?
SPEAKER_01: Second thought.
SPEAKER_01: The very bridge you cross, or excuse me, the very bridge you destroy with unforgiveness is the same bridge you will need to cross at some point.
SPEAKER_01: So you don't want to be the person who burns the bridge of forgiveness, but when you need to cross it, you you don't have anything at your disposal.
SPEAKER_01: We want to be found faithful above all else, and we don't want to have to carry the weight of hauling that stuff around.
SPEAKER_01: One of those symptoms, I don't know if you caught that, it said it talked about accelerated the aging process.
SPEAKER_01: Unforgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: We're not talking about like junk food.
SPEAKER_01: We're talking about unforgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: There are some tangible consequences that are going to happen if we choose not to forgive.
SPEAKER_01: So let me give you a very practical takeaway from all of this.
SPEAKER_01: I want to ask you to answer this question.
SPEAKER_01: I need to forgive a blank, and I want to ask you to fill in that blank.
SPEAKER_01: Who is it?
SPEAKER_01: What is it?
SPEAKER_01: Is it yourself?
SPEAKER_01: Very well, you need you may need to forgive yourself.
SPEAKER_01: I found that grace is one of the most difficult things to explain to people of faith because it's like, well, I didn't earn it, I didn't deserve it.
SPEAKER_01: I'm like, yeah, that's what grace means.
SPEAKER_01: So you may need to forgive yourself.
SPEAKER_01: If that's the case, my my ask is that you would leave here with a clear sense of it is doable in Jesus.
SPEAKER_01: If it was doable apart from Jesus, you would have already done it.
SPEAKER_01: Let me give you my sermon summary and we will transition from here.
SPEAKER_01: You'll never meet a person who's walking in the freedom, the true freedom Christ offers, who also has unforgiveness in his or her heart.
SPEAKER_01: When it comes to unforgiveness, know that you will never leave where you are until you decide where you'd rather be.
SPEAKER_01: So take the first step today by exhaling to freedom.
SPEAKER_01: God wants us to breathe again.
SPEAKER_01: But you might be the reason why you're not breathing.
SPEAKER_01: Can I ask you to pray with me?
SPEAKER_01: Father, I thank you for this example from the scriptures.
SPEAKER_01: I thank you that we can be better today than we were yesterday.
SPEAKER_01: And where it's evident, where it's clear that we are out of alignment with you as it relates to forgiveness.
SPEAKER_01: Holy Spirit, would you give us great courage today?
SPEAKER_01: I realize that this is a this is a big order.
SPEAKER_01: This is a tall ask, but you're a big God, so this is fully doable in you.
SPEAKER_01: Would we leave here today with a clear sense of what it means to embody the goodness of God here on the earth if for no other reason we've been recipients of forgiveness?
SPEAKER_01: Those nails in Jesus' hands and feet were not because he sinned.
SPEAKER_01: It was because we did.
SPEAKER_01: May that be fuel for us to remember why forgiveness is so valuable.
SPEAKER_01: I pray for the person, even right now, who's got the tug of war going on in their heart about what all this means.
SPEAKER_01: Would you give them great peace to know that you are a God who does not waste anything?
SPEAKER_01: And part of walking through this exercise of forgiveness may very well be you moving them to the next tier of faith in Christ.
SPEAKER_01: Go before us today that we might be able to accomplish what you've set before us.
SPEAKER_01: And we thank you in advance for what will come from this.
SPEAKER_01: Thanks for being a God who always hears us when we pray.
SPEAKER_01: We do ask this in the name of Jesus Christ and all those who agreed said amen.
SPEAKER_00: We're gonna leave this up on the screen and just meditate and think about what God said through his word today.
SPEAKER_00: So Lindsay's gonna play, she may sing something.
SPEAKER_00: Let's just take a moment and ask for what's just been planted in our hearts through God's word to bear some fruit.
SPEAKER_00: We'll do that together and then I'll close this in prayer.
SPEAKER_00: Lord, it's easy to forget what the blood of Jesus Christ accomplished.
SPEAKER_00: It's easy to forget that those who have been forgiven much, we've now been able to turn and forgive much.
SPEAKER_00: So Lord, I pray today that you would do just as Pastor Malcolm said, that you would reveal and remind us where there's any sin in our lives, the sin of unforgiveness.
SPEAKER_00: Help us to be a people.
SPEAKER_00: The people that just the gospel is so present, we are so gospel fluent, that that's just second nature to us.
SPEAKER_00: Help us to grow into it where it's not.
SPEAKER_00: We pray this in your awesome name, Jesus.
SPEAKER_00: Amen.
SPEAKER_00: Uh would you join me in thanking Pastor Malcolm for being with us today?
SPEAKER_00: I want to thank you as well.
SPEAKER_00: If uh this is your first time with us.
SPEAKER_00: My name is Clyde.
SPEAKER_00: I'm the worship pastor, and uh we're really glad you decided to look into our church.
SPEAKER_00: Uh, there is a card on the chair back in front of you.
SPEAKER_00: We'd love for you to fill that out and drop it in one of these boxes by the doors.
SPEAKER_00: Uh that way we can know you're here, answer any questions you might have about the church.
SPEAKER_00: Also, today, if uh today's the day you worship through giving, uh, that's where you do that as well.
SPEAKER_00: Uh, we have a few things going on in the life of our church that we're gonna watch through our video announcements, and then when those are done, uh, Malcolm's gonna come back and close us with a blessing.
SPEAKER_00: So let's turn our attentions to the screens.
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for joining us today.
SPEAKER_00: Here's a few things we want you to know.
SPEAKER_00: Our blood drive is happening on May 30th in the warehouse.
SPEAKER_00: Grab your spot at grandparkway.org slash events.
SPEAKER_00: Due to inclement weather, today's churchwide picnic has been postponed to September 12th.
SPEAKER_00: Student camp sign up is still happening for the summer.
SPEAKER_00: To register, head to grandparkway.org slash events.
SPEAKER_00: If you're new or would like someone to pray with you, find one of our pastors at the front of the stage at the conclusion of our service.
SPEAKER_01: Can I ask you to stand to your feet this morning?
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna ask you to put your hands out front like this here.
SPEAKER_01: As a sign of God, I want to receive.
SPEAKER_01: The beautiful thing of exposed hands with palms open is you actually can receive.
SPEAKER_01: You can also give.
SPEAKER_01: But when your hands are like this, nothing comes in, nothing comes out.
SPEAKER_01: And so may the Lord use this benediction to bless you in the way of your openness.
SPEAKER_01: Let's pray.
SPEAKER_01: Father, with our hands extended, we thank you for the grace that you continue to bestow upon us in Christ.
SPEAKER_01: I ask that every person under the sound of my voice today would live in light of the truth that Jesus Christ is Lord.
SPEAKER_01: We thank you that you continue to give us all that we need and even some of our wants.
SPEAKER_01: You're a good God.
SPEAKER_01: May we be an example.
SPEAKER_01: May we be representatives of that here in the earth.
SPEAKER_01: With our hands extended, we say thank you.
SPEAKER_01: Grace us as you know we need to be graced, and give us what we need to walk in your strength and in your power.
SPEAKER_01: In the name of Christ, the one who hung blood and died for our sins, and the one in whom our forgiveness lies.
SPEAKER_01: It's in that name we pray.
SPEAKER_01: And all those who agree said, Amen.
SPEAKER_01: Amen.
SPEAKER_01: Blessings to you all.
SPEAKER_01: You're dismissed.