Nanny Q & A: Setting Standards in Contracts & Professional Negotiations - Part 2

Ever wonder how top-tier nannies lock in real benefits, predictable pay, and sane schedules—especially on demanding rota teams? We dig into the playbook that turns “hope” into clauses: health insurance reimbursements done tax-free, inflation-proof COLA raises, and clear travel policies that pay you from door to door. We share the exact levers to pull, when to bring them up, and how to frame every ask so it supports the family’s priorities while protecting your time, energy, and earnings.

We break down QSEHRA vs ICHRA in plain language, why W-2 status matters, and how to present options families can run through payroll and their advisors. Then we map rota realities: guaranteed weekly hours, state-driven overtime rules, paid flight time, miles and points to the traveler, TSA PreCheck and Clear, and what to spell out for arrivals, delays, and changeovers. Live-in setups get their own checklist—room standards, guest policies, cleaning coverage, and shared suite etiquette—so there’s no confusion between rotations.

Team dynamics can be a strength instead of a stressor. We talk transparency without competition, aligning care standards for kids while embracing different styles, and escalating safety or security concerns fast. You’ll hear high-impact perks to negotiate—annual bonuses, clothing stipends for events, gym memberships, car cleanings, and professional development or educational assistance—along with scripts to position them as retention tools, not demands. Finally, we share the habit that makes it all stick: print the contract, track PTO and holidays, and use “Let me check the contract and circle back” as your boundary-saving pause.

If you’re ready to elevate your career with contracts that match your value, this conversation gives you the numbers, language, and confidence to do it. Subscribe, share with a fellow nanny, and leave a review telling us the one clause you’re adding to your contract next.

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Transcript

Live Summit Kickoff & Guest Intros

SPEAKER_02 1:27

Welcome to Adventure Nannies on Air. Today's episode was recorded live during one of our summit sessions as a part of our free ongoing educational webinar series to support nannies and professional childcare providers to elevate their careers and enhance their skills. If you like what you hear, you can catch the full episode on our YouTube channel or register for our next summit session at adventurannies.com slash summit dash sessions. Welcome to tonight's summit session, everybody. I am so excited. I'm telling a part two today. If you joined us back in November, it was, I believe, we were so honored to have the amazing Tori and Caitlin. And I will say, I gave them the best intros that were full of my house. They are recorded. What I'm gonna do is just give Tori and just like one second to tell a little bit about who they are, whatever they want you to do. And then we're just gonna jump right in tonight because I know that they have so much great content prepped, and there's so many of you that I'm sure you'll have more questions. We're gonna jump into it. Tori, Caitlin, if you guys can each just take one second and tell us how long you've been in the industry and what your role is in the industry now. Um, and then we'll jump right into it.

Why Advocacy And Standards Matter

SPEAKER_01 2:38

Okay, I'll go first. I have been in this industry for full-time for about seven or eight years. Plus, I've done anything from live in, live out, full-time nanny to rota is what I'm currently doing, and then I've been doing for the past couple of years. I was also a Peace Corps volunteer and I graduated with a business degree, so nothing childhood related, although I'd like to go back and get a degree in early childhood education eventually. But yeah, I've done ultra high net worth families, fully staffed homes, and I just love nanny. So that's amazing.

SPEAKER_02 3:09

Yes, that is perfect. That was like the perfect exactly what I wanted. There's a much longer version of that intro on part one. Um, if you want, if you didn't join us and want to go listen to it. Okay, Len, let's hear, let's hear your short and sweet version.

SPEAKER_00 3:24

Yeah, I have been in the industry for 20 years. I started out as a high net worth nanny and then worked my way up to ultra high net worth high profile rota. And now I am ultra high net worth family assistant nanny, kind of a a little jack of ultra haids. I went to school for communication disorder sciences at the University of Oregon and studied child development. And I'm just here because I love all things contract.

SPEAKER_02 3:56

Amazing. And I don't think I introduced myself. I am Reagan Fulton, the marketing director here at Adventure Manny's. We are so excited that Tori and Kate were back because not only did we run out of time where we just had so much more to talk about, but we've gotten so much great feedback about the first summit session that people wanted to hear more from you guys. So after all the bins, how would your guys' winter? How are you guys doing since the last time we spoke?

SPEAKER_00 4:22

Pretty great. A lot of organizing holiday decorations, prepping the family for an extended trip and getting ready for a renovation. So super busy on my end. I don't know when the holiday was. It could have been last week, but I've just been running since we had our.

SPEAKER_02 4:39

I'm pretty sure January actually was like 45 weeks long. Sorry about how much you have you been since we spoke in November.

SPEAKER_01 4:46

Good. Yeah, it's been really busy. I feel like there's been a lot of travel on my principal's front at work. That's been knife, also can get pectic. And then I also just recently got a new kitten that has been an absolute handful. That I feel like is what has taken over my personal life.

SPEAKER_02 5:03

Absolutely, yes. They they show up and they take over very quickly. I've got one who's finally out of the pink stage, but amazing. Let's jump right into it. You mentioned something in our prep that I really just wanted to start with. Um, you mentioned that advocating is really a privilege when it comes to advocating for contracts. Can you explain like what you mean by that? That it's really a privilege to advocate for nannies and why do you feel it's so important that nannies have access to this information that you're about to dive in and tell us about?

SPEAKER_01 5:36

Yeah, I just want to start and say that as to white presenting people, it is just first a privilege to I recognize the privilege I have in being here and having these discussions. And I don't take that lightly. So I do want to say that I recognize the opportunities that have just been laid forth. And I think that's like what I would want to start with. But then I think advocating for these industry standards is a way that all of us can have the same baseline, we can have the same things we ask for and are accepting. And it can just be a blanket of just ever equalness for what we will accept in the nanny industry. And it's just a privilege to be able to advocate for that. And there's so much about advocating for that that's important for all of us. So I that's my little tidbit, but absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 6:28

Anything to add to that, Caitlin, or just echoing that?

Health Insurance 101: QSEHRA vs ICHRA

SPEAKER_00 6:31

We're excited to be able to ask for industry standards because we worked hard to get where we are. We know other nannies have worked hard. We want the other nannies that are working hard that do not have, you know, health insurance or professional development or any of that. We want that to be a blanket across our industry so that it already established nannies, but also up-and-coming new nannies, all of that, that they have that blanket and those opportunities to elevate their career and really establish this as a profession, not only in the community's eyes, but the world as a whole.

SPEAKER_02 7:07

Amazing.

SPEAKER_00 7:08

Excited to dig more in.

SPEAKER_02 7:09

Last time we talked a little bit more about the broad, like, how do you why should you advocate? Why are contracts important? And we're gonna dig a little bit more into the details today. So let's start with numbers. Like healthcare. I've heard QCRs, ISIR, there's all the different acronyms. Nannies don't have traditional group insurance. I will say we best thing ever. And the government was like, yeah, this is one of the missing. So tell me, what are the race limits? What do we need to be aware of? What are the pla what are the options and how do you negotiate for those healthcare benefits? And just talk a little bit about any.

SPEAKER_00 7:57

Yeah, absolutely. I just want to say healthcare.gov has all of this information. If I jumble some of the numbers or you know, mix up some of the words, please do your own research. I just want to make sure that you know that this is a resource that you can advocate for yourself, but for continued research on your end. So there is QCERA, which I think most people lean towards, most families lean towards. It's a qualified small employer health reimbursement arrangement and HRA, right? There's two different comms, we do prefecto style. So those rates are governed by the R IRS and they do fluctuate. Well, they increase every year, right? So this last year we had a hundred dollars. It's now this year for the entire year, your employer can reimburse you for up to six thousand four hundred and fifty dollars for insuring you as a single insured person. That's you know$537 a month, which is amazing. They can also offer it for family coverage, which is about$13,000, give or take. So super amazing. The one thing that I love is that it's a reimbursement. You are not part of a group plan, like Reagan said. So your insurance does not follow your job, it follows you. So if you choose to change your position and move on, you are still covered and you don't have the headache of switching mid-year or you know, mid-month or or any of that. The other one that is fairly common, and if you can talk your employers into this one, maybe more financially beneficial, it's called an ICRA and it's an individual cover help reimbursement arrangement in another HRA. This one, it doesn't have any MACs listed. So your employer gets to determine the max reimbursement that they'll give to you within a 12-month period. There are, you do have to qualify, you do have to do some reporting to the IRS to make sure that it's being run through all the right channels, because both of these are tax-free to you and your employer if you're filing it correctly. So a lot of payroll services will help you help your employer set up the paperwork to ensure that you're doing that. And then that payment just gets added to your paycheck, like a stipend one once a month, or well, it most likely would be once a month. But both are super amazing. Both should be presented to your employer. Employers love to have the option, they love to do their own research, they have often their own teams that will dive into either. But yeah, advocate for it, ask for health insurance, especially if your employer is able to write it off and you're able to get the health insurance that you need to be able to show up and stay healthy at your position. So important. But also, I mean, I it's just amazing. Tax-free. So and that's it.

SPEAKER_02 11:00

And so that's a really great way to bring it to the table.

SPEAKER_00 11:03

Um you have to be W-2, which we all should be, but I know not everyone has that luxury. But I do think pairing the two together, if I'm W-2, then I can have this benefit, which will benefit in turn you, your family, your children. So really stack it on.

SPEAKER_01 11:23

Yeah. So really turning it into go ahead. Uh I was just gonna say, and I think like sometimes it can be really overwhelming to present like these options if you also started learning about it yourself for the first time and everything, and then your employers are gonna have to go and learn what it about it and everything. But I think a lot of families are probably already reimbursing a certain portion of health insurance, or some maybe not as much as we would hope. But I think some are already doing that and maybe don't know about the benefits of filing correctly to receive these tax-free. So I think it's even if you're already getting covered, no matter like if it's a hundred dollar, whatever you're being covered for healthcare, if you are, look into that if you don't already, because this is a great way to let your employers know if they're not already filing that way, that they can also receive benefits from it. So even if you are getting some sort of coverage, like definitely look at what you have and look at these options as well.

SPEAKER_00 12:17

Yeah, you do buy a health plan with the your monthly stipend. I just call it a stipend.

Cost Of Living Adjustments Explained

SPEAKER_02 12:24

Awesome. Moving on to the next point, healthcare keeps getting more and more expensive. That's why it's so important to have that backup coverage. So is everything else. Everything is getting more expensive. When we talk about inflation, I mean, reality of inflation, cost of living keeps increasing. I know you did some research in the numbers, but how do you calculate that gross pay? What happens? Just talk about inflation a little bit.

unknown 12:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:51

Yeah. So a great thing to have in your contract is a cola adjustment, and it's a cost of living adjustment and similar to a raise, although not the exact same, because the cola adjustment allows for the increase and inflation of the cost of goods, which is everything, groceries, gas, everything that falls under that. And so the Social Security and supplemental, and I'm also if I look down, I have the numbers written down because I want to make sure they're as accurate as I can. Supplemental security income have determined for this year, it's 2.8%, the cola adjustment. And anybody that works in a private sector can really include this in their contract and receive it kind of thing. And so it would, you would multiply to figure all the numbers out, you would want to use your gross pay. So before taxes and adjustments and everything. If that you're paid bi-weekly, that can look like that, or if you're paid once a month, but you would calculate your number based off of your gross pay multiplied by 0.028 or 2.8%, and you'll get a number. So that could be, I have an example. If you your gross pay is$2,500 bi-weekly and you multiply it by 0.028, then that is a$70 bi-weekly cola adjustment that would be tacked on to your pay. So then you would be receiving$2,570 bi-weekly instead of so I also want to make a big point in that, like the this is different than a merit-based raise, although I think although altogether, like a common raise is 3.5%. So I wouldn't expect to get a cola adjustment at 2.8% and also a five percent that would be lovely, and a 5% raise on top of that. Like that would be amazing, but I wouldn't expect that because the cost of living adjustment does allow a raise of some sort each year for you. But I think it could be common to get the 2.8% cola adjustment and a merit-based raise at one or two percent. Like that is very reasonable and should be acceptable as well, just because those are different. Like cost of living, it's has nothing to do with how I'm doing my job or what I'm doing in my job. It is allowing for inflation where a merit-based raise is those tasks that you're taking on that are not in your job description or things that you are doing that are merit-based that deserve a raise as well. So that's like a snippet of the cost of living adjustment.

SPEAKER_02 15:12

Amazing. That's what I was doing as you were talking. I was like, number what you're telling me is that like the 2.8 isn't the raise I got because it did a great job. It was just so this was this 2.8 is the what the standard across the board should be for any nanny to be able to ask for.

SPEAKER_00 15:30

Right. And it's amazing every year. And then just we we touched on this last time. You know, it's so hard to ask for these things. It's so hard to advocate for these raises or health insurance being raised or any of that. But if you build it into your contract, you don't have to ask. You get to discuss it and talk about how it was something that you guys negotiated and now it's being honored, but it you don't have to ask. So you're helping yourself a year down the line by building this in. And then, Tori, just to add on to what you were saying, that it's not a merit raise based, right? So you can also add in verbiage in your contract, which I do in all of my contracts, that at minimum I get the cola for that year that I'm, you know, renewing for, but that it is not in lieu of a merit-based raise. And that that is to be considered as well.

SPEAKER_02 16:27

That might be so you're setting that expectation from the beginning, not you, you're not waiting until that year to have that ask.

SPEAKER_00 16:35

Yeah. And it's way easier to stand firm in your ask when you're negotiating your first contract with a family because you guys don't have that familiarity with one another, you don't have your working rapport yet. You're going to establish it and you're doing that through this contract. But you know, things get really comfy and then it gets a little more uncomfortable to ask for things. So really be bold in your requests and really make sure that you're following through on them when the year is coming up.

Rota Basics: Pay, Overtime, Guarantees

SPEAKER_02 17:04

Yeah. That's amazing. So coming down to contracts, you guys have special experience with rota contracts. I know that's what a lot of people are really interested in hearing specifically about this kind of the specifics. What tell us about the nuance of like when it comes to rota contracts? You're negotiating them a little bit differently, it sounds what about things like gear and seed hours? And over time, especially I know some states have different laws. There are all some of the nuances when it comes to negotiating a rota contract versus kind of your standard 52-week nanny contract.

SPEAKER_01 17:42

Yeah. So I would say the biggest thing is even within Rhoda, like each job is going to be so different, and each contract is going to look a lot different. I feel like almost no two ROTAs have the same type of schedule, type of principles, type of anything.

SPEAKER_02 17:57

So we know this here than when her nannies, we know.

SPEAKER_01 18:02

So I say all of that in I will tell you my experience, and like I think it will give you ideas to think about if you were to receive a rota job and to make sure these are talked about, number one, and included in your contract, whatever way that looked like for you. So I think like the biggest thing thing is guaranteed hours. It's still the same. You still are guaranteed for me personally. I'm guaranteed to get paid 26 a year, 26 weeks a year, sorry, if whether or not I am needed for those 26 weeks. So if my principals decide to go on vacation, they don't need me, it's the same thing. I get guaranteed hours for those 26 weeks. And then pay wise, I am guaranteed for the I'm on 24-7. So even if I am not needed that 24-7, the whole time I am there, I am still paid for it because I am on 24-7. So guaranteed hours should still be the same or look similar to that in some capacity. For me, my hourly rate looks a lot different. I feel like than if you're used to working in maybe a high net worth or ultra high net worth position where it could reflect like a higher rate because I work in California and overtime laws are absolutely the same in California for anybody that is also working there and knows. So I my pay is based on a salary amount, but I am not a salaried employee, nor should any of us be. So I am not salaried, but my rate reflects that on a salary basis. But I paid hourly. It's a little confusing, but they just have to, they we use a couple of different hourly numbers because I go into like extreme overtime by day four that I'm there. Like it's just because it's 24-7, it just the the extra overtime is just a lot. But so that's I don't know if you have anything to add there, Caitlin, but that's what my for that part looked like my guaranteed hours and pay and everything.

SPEAKER_00 19:52

Yeah. When for my rota, it was the weekly guaranteed uh 65 hours. So I had 25 hours of overtime built in each week.

SPEAKER_01 20:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:04

Not that I ever worked just 65, but that's what our base was. Yeah. But I didn't work in California, so it was a breeze accordingly.

SPEAKER_01 20:15

And I also have had a rota position in Florida, and it was a lot different. Florida didn't have the same overtime laws. So that when you look at the hourly pay, it was higher, but that was because they also didn't have the same amount of like overtime laws. And I also wasn't 24-7 at that point. So it was also a little different, but yeah, so it's just depending on where you are, it can look a lot different. But I say all of that to say you should have guaranteed hours and guaranteed weeks that you're working, whether you work them or not.

SPEAKER_02 20:42

I was saying I want to pause real quick on the guaranteed hours because I think what's really important that you guys both said is, and this is the thing that gets people confused about guaranteed hours, and especially employers, is it was it's within a week. So your hour guaranteed by the week, they're not shifting from week to week. You're still guaranteed 26 weeks of pay as well. If you're working at traditional, you're guaranteed a lot of times it'll be 50 or yeah, hopefully 52, but you know, they'll be different, but it's the same thing. Guaranteed hours still consistently are within the week. There is still no banking of hours allowed. Um, I think that's a really just important point that you guys both pointed out.

SPEAKER_00 21:26

Um other that that's your livelihood. That's that needs to be included in any contract, in my opinion.

SPEAKER_02 21:37

Absolutely. Yeah, they're expecting a consistency that you need the consistency and pay for sure. Yeah.

unknown 21:44

Yeah.

Travel Policies, Miles, And Paid Flight Time

SPEAKER_01 21:45

So I think the next biggest part that looks a little different for Rhodec is obviously all of your fly. If you are a fly in fly out, I guess I should say you're flying and your the costs that come with flying and just associated flying. So obviously most Rhoda nannies uh should, and I haven't seen any that haven't included actual flying as part, they cover all of that. A lot of a lot of the jobs, and I would say it's probably the same for you, Caitlin, is that they allow you to kind of book the flights and whether that looks like you booking them and getting reimbursed or you having a credit card and using the credit card, but you book them for the sake of like your schedule and your mile, you should be receiving the miles and points and all of that. You're the one flying, not anybody else. And a lot of roto positions allow that. I don't think I've seen too many that haven't. But in most contracts, have an inclement weather or flight delay. They'll have something in there associated with that, like what they want to see happen if a nanny coming in has a delayed flight and they're not going to make it in there by a certain time or a canceled flight or whatever. Principals usually are going to specify what they want to see there. And it probably is very dependent on what your principal do, how often they're gone, what that kind of looks like on the whole nanny team for you as a rota. But then I think at the very least, TSA pre-check is one of those things that should be covered as a rota nanny. Another, I think, ask that is very kind to consider is also clear and getting that covered by a family because you are traveling so frequently. But I think TSA pre check at the minimum, the cost is I think 75, 80 bucks for five years and can just save a lot of time. So much. So worth it. Yeah. And most families cover like bag fees and any associated bag fee. That you would have when you're flying. I've never had anybody like cap it, say we're only covering one bag, but I don't that that could be a thing. I don't know, but they should at least cover one checked bag every time you're flying. But like I said, I have never had anybody cap any luggage. I've brought Rhoda Wise space that's been limited, and especially if you're flying private like that, that that can be limited, and there can be a lot of things there if you're just flying to your rotation.

SPEAKER_02 23:54

I haven't seen What about really dare the question in the comments about the time that you're flying? Is that something that do you get paid for the time you're flying? Do you get paid when you touch down in the city? Do you get paid when you walk through the door? Like, when are you on when it comes to your rotation?

SPEAKER_00 24:12

I think, well, I not that I think in my contract, it was when I leave my door to head to the airport, I my clock starts running. And then it's my travel time to the airport, my entire flight time, and then getting to my destination. Usually, you know, you're overnighting. If you're rotated, sometimes you're popping right into your your shift. I know you do that, Tori, but yeah, you know, if you're landing and and kid free, responsible free, then you know, your time stops. But oftentimes it is from door to door.

SPEAKER_01 24:46

Yeah. And I my contract currently isn't oddly super specific on that. But yeah, it's the same thing. And that was how my other Rotas have been. It's always been, yeah, when you leave to when you get when you walk back in your door at the house. It's it's almost like just another way to commute to work and just a different way of commuting and still is part of getting paid for that position. And then yeah, my my changeover is I know probably different than some. We always switch over on Tuesdays and have it pretty much set between 12 and 4. A lot of times we'll try to get in. Whoever's coming in will try to get in before 12 or one. And then usually the other person doesn't schedule a flight out until, you know, past four or five or so. And that gives us enough time for flexibility if something were to happen, but then also just flying in, getting to the house, switching over, relaying information, and allowing the other person to get a car and leave and such, which is what we uh most of the time will Uber or Lyft to the house. That's always just worked for both different rotas I've had. There's some people that leave nanny cars at airports that you can take, or maybe they have something else arranged where somebody, a driver of some sort is picking you up when you fly in. That's going to look different for every rota. But for a lot of mine, they've always been Uber or Lyft from the airport. Obviously, that cost is covered to the house, and vice versa. So that's another. But those are all just like very specific like travel and rota just focused things in your contract that are not going to be in your typical a Monday through Friday contract, but that you want to think about whatever that looks like for you, the nanny team, your principal, everything like that.

SPEAKER_00 26:31

I think it one thing that we didn't touch on was living arrangements. Typically, Rotas are live in if they're flying in. And so those accommodations are clearly laid out.

SPEAKER_01 26:43

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 26:43

So if you want to touch on that more.

Live-In Setup & Shared Spaces

SPEAKER_01 26:45

Yeah. And I I also want to say that if you yeah, in your contract, you'll have most often like the same rules that if you are a live-in nanny, just like a full-time live-in nanny, that they'll lay out like what area of you're going to be living in, what you're if it's part of the house, what part of the house, what you have in there. And just a lot of times they'll say no guests. There will be different rules, like you were like a live-in. Because I mean you are when you're on rota. And a lot of times I think it's common to share those spaces too with your other rota, at least one or two of your other Rotas, if there is a team present. And so there might be guidelines in there to us, or there should be guidelines in there to establish who's responsible for that cleaning. I don't know if it's looked different for both of mine. Some of my other rota, like we would pick up after each other kind of, and then there would be a cleaning team that would come in, but not always on that same day. Now at my current rota, there's a housekeeping staff that takes care of that. So we don't really do any. So it looks very different depending on what rota position you have, but that will should be laid out in your contract as well. Um living there.

SPEAKER_02 27:51

We got a question that I think is really related to this that I want to touch on. They asked about the working dynamic with the other rota nanny, which I think you guys just touched greatly on. But really great question. Is the contract always the same? And especially when we're talking about the contract of this handoff, is the road you've got two different rotas, does their contract always look the same? And should there be an overlap and there are agreements that need to be on both? How do you navigate that? I'm curious if there's like a nanny-to-nanny contract or agreement that you have when you're sharing the layer shared living space, or if it's just all laid out in your contract. What does that look like in terms of that shared living space and navigating it? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 28:33

I don't think they're often I'm I've never seen two contracts that are the same. Again, you know, we talk about different asks that we each have for our contracts, different awareness that we we discuss with our employers or their office before we join a team. So those I've never seen two rotracts that are the same. There's they're similar points, like the the changeover, your living arrangements, oftentimes live in arrangements. There'll be further in-depth detail in your household manual. So maybe not everything's included in your contract, but you'll have a household manual that you'll be able to consult. But like travel, general duties, your duties should be the same unless there's some sort of hierarchy on within the nanny team. So there is some overlap, but like I wouldn't expect PTO to be the same. I wouldn't expect, you know, someone to everyone to have a cola. I would love everyone to have a cola in there, but no, I know some nannies, Rhodas that have asked for bonuses, some haven't, some have asked for, you know, different accommodations to fly in 24 hours before and stay in a hotel to, you know, get acclimated to wherever. You know, they they're all so different in my experience. Yeah, and this no, go ahead.

SPEAKER_02 29:52

I was gonna say we talked about the last time. Like I know about it's important to figure out what you want and negotiate for what's benefits you personally. So that makes a lot of sense. Um, and then I think you hit the nail on the head. Oh, and that's a good follow-up of discussing or not. Like, what do you discuss and not discuss between in terms of differences of contracts? What's on the table, what's not? Is it professional? Is it good to be transparent? Um, but in terms of the household manual, I think that answered a great for what needs to be the same, put it in the household manual. Those agreements there. But yeah, curious, what is on the table for discussion between rota nannies in your contracts?

Team Dynamics, Transparency, And Boundaries

SPEAKER_01 30:31

Yeah, I was just also gonna touch on, yeah, I've never seen like something written in a contract either like an agreement almost with like your co-rota. I've seen tasks and stuff like that on there that might align for both of you. But I think that comes with working on a nanny team and working with other co-rhodas, is that it's just if you have a roommate, there are unspoken rules of sharing spaces together and and that you should speak out loud when you start with the team. Like, what are the ground rules for sharing the space? And you should work very closely with your like co-rota or team to make sure that everybody is there are guides, like you guys, if you don't already have them, create guidelines that you can abide by when you know you're there to just ease like any tensions that may come up with sharing a space. But yeah, I think I don't know, I'm sorry, just blanked, but it's okay when if you have anything to add, and it'll come back.

SPEAKER_00 31:24

I think when you're discussing anything in any workplace regarding your pay, your benefits, any of that, don't ask what you don't want to know. So if you're going to ask the question, be ready for whatever answer might come your way. I would go in with the mindset of it being a learning experience. I know some Rodas on a team, one might be greener than the other. So ask with curiosity and a want to further your career to gather information to learn. Don't ask with jealousy. The last thing that you want in your rota team is competition. It's in super important to leave that out. So don't ask if you're not able to leave that bit out.

SPEAKER_01 32:10

Yeah. And I would say you want to hide, like you not in maybe any other way, but other than just between you, like highlight what you how you are different and like what you both bring to the table. I think honestly, my co-road and I just had this discussion last time we met up. It like we are very different, like just in a very personal level.

SPEAKER_02 32:29

We are two very different people, but we work one of the reasons to have a rota team is that you can have different strengths and on your team. Yeah. Yeah. It's like a huge reason to do it.

SPEAKER_01 32:40

Yeah. And it works. Like we work together very well. And overall, with the kids, like our care is the same. We may do things completely differently. They know then they know our differences by now. Like they know some things are just different. But like it's so great. They're never going to, the kids are never going to have the same two people in their life. So the fact that they get child care in this aspect where they are receiving so many different just people and perspectives and everything is incredible. So I would say we joke about it all the time. Like my other co-world and I like like we know she knows I'm a planner and she is more go with the flow. And we joke about it all the time. I'm like, I'm gonna be the one with the little checklist. Well, she's just let's let's go to the beach. So like we joke about it all the time. So like I think highlighting those differences is not a bad thing either. But yeah, when it comes to contract stuff, I couldn't agree with you more, Caitlin, when you said don't ask what you don't want to know because it could be different. And you just have to be prepared for that when you ask. But I've always been pretty open and have never had an issue with any nanny teams in that aspect for me personally.

SPEAKER_02 33:47

But yeah. Amazing. We are getting a lot of amazing questions, and I know you guys saw more, so I'm gonna try to like get through the rest of your guys's things that you wanted to cover because we've got some awesome questions too to cover in the chat. When it comes down to like time off as a rota, holiday schedule, like especially when you're talking about how you navigate with your co-rota. I'm sure everybody wants Christmas off and everyone wants Thanksgiving off. And everyone wants how do you navigate kind of this holidays when it comes to a rota schedule? Is it just they fall where they fall? What happens there? Yes.

Holidays, PTO, Sick Time & Backup Plans

SPEAKER_01 34:24

And I I would say this is probably the most different when it comes to each rota job. I even Caitlin and I differed. I've never done PTO with my Rotas. I've mostly always been two weeks on, two weeks off. So I haven't really felt it's been as necessary because the two weeks does allow me to maybe also plan a trip and have a few days off. But Caitlin made a good point when she was one week on, one week off that her PTO was definitely included. And I could see that a little, if I think I would incorporate that in if I were one week on, one week off for sure, because it leaves you less time on your off time. But yeah, so I I don't have any PTA PT PTA, PTO in my contract. I do have sick weave just like any other nanny would, which you should as well. Just because you're rota doesn't mean you don't get sick. The kids are bringing home stuff all the time. Your sick weave should not differ just because you're a rota nanny. And holidays and schedules, that's also looked different for me than I think a lot of other Rhoda nannies. I've always been really flexible with my nanny team and co-nannies. And we've been able to adjust our schedules and work together on that and create a schedule that's worked for us. Whether that means I've got Thanksgiving Christmas this year, you get new, or you Thanksgiving Halloween, you get Christmas, New Year's Hanukkah, and it's switched the next year. We've always been able to also adjust our schedule a little bit, whether that means we work one week on, one week off a couple of times, or three weeks on, three weeks off. It's always been very nanny-led the schedule. For me, that's just how it's been and how it's worked. And I know that can look really different for other people, and principals might have a lot more say in that. And maybe even a business office team schedules that and there's not as much input, but that's what mine have looked like.

SPEAKER_00 36:10

I think to just an addition to the PTO and the sick time, it's important to include the the backup plan because we we don't plan to be sick, but if we're flying fly out, often we are it. So it's important to have that next chain of who gets called in. Also with PTO and Rhoda, just because you're asking for time off does not mean that your co-nanny is going to pick up that slack. So having that written in, what's the backup plan? How does that how do you deal with a lack of coverage for sick time or PTO days? I think that's important. That's just having clarity like that in your team, it helps you to stay a team. You're having that that lane that you both know you're traveling in. So clarity in a contract as a rota is incredibly important.

SPEAKER_02 36:59

Absolutely. No one's building resentment because you got sick and they got called in early and had to fly in. Or do you have any examples of what do backup plans might they look like?

SPEAKER_00 37:11

Yeah, often nanny agencies will have sitters that are on call. I've had I worked with a family that we had a sitter that was on call. We I think they paid her maybe like 20 hours a week, and that was just an as needed, if anything came up, addition that we had for our household, which was really lovely. Yeah. I mean, sometimes, you know, it's up to the family office to find your replacement. Sometimes you're calling in favors from across the US, like, when can you get here? But yeah, there's there's several different avenues, lots of ways to to vet potential backup.

SPEAKER_02 37:51

You should know what the plan is and who to call when you do need that ahead of time. Yeah, amazing. Anything else on holidays and and PTO and the standards? I know you wanted to talk about the big asks too. Like what are the special things that you can ask for as well in a contract?

SPEAKER_00 38:11

Yeah, not go ahead, Kawan. Oh, we had two rota teams, and three of us asked for Christmas off in our contracts and received it. So that was to the detriment of that one individual. So yeah, I just always expect if it's in my rotation, I'm working it, whether it's a holiday or not, even if I've asked for it, you know, that's kind of one of the the things with Rhoda. You gotta show up for your team. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 38:37

I was saying before we jump into the kind of the big ask on that topic, we there's some just come some kind of questions in the chat that I want to just cover about. I think really the overall is of being compared and that being dynamic. Do you ever feel like there's an imbalance of treatment between team members? And then there's also a question about possible concerning behaviors about a co-anny or anything like that. Do you have any advice for nannies in terms of kind of the those trickier dynamics between co-nannies when you're in a rota or team situation and how to approach those diplomatically?

SPEAKER_00 39:18

Yeah, I think one of the benefits of being rota is that you are not working together. And like Tori highlighted, one of the benefits is that you two are so different, which is lovely. So when those comparisons come up, you're like, yeah, we are different, or this is a little different. But the the basic needs are are still the same. You're still meeting the children with their schedules, you're still going to the same activities, you know, you're doing the same mealtimes, you're offering the favorite snacks, whatever it might be, you're still consistent on the base level that children need. And if if your principles are saying that you're different, then that's a more inquisitive, like, yeah, we are different. Is there something that you'd like me to do different? You know, should I touch base with my co-anny and and see how we can align for a more cohesive changeover or you know, schedule or whatever it might be? But I think most of the time you're coming with curiosity and just also, yeah, it that's what it is. We're different. And isn't that so cool?

Big Asks: Bonuses, Stipends, Perks

SPEAKER_01 40:25

Yeah, and I would say there are any issues. I think it's largely based on how your job is set up, whether it is a nanny team, whether you have a business team that has maybe an HR person or somebody there, whether you have a household manager, maybe they're tasked with a lot of the hiring and issues like that. I think there's always though somebody in the world of where you're working that if there are strong issues, like you could mention that if you're struggling in that way. But I think the first line should always be open communication with your principals and with your co-nannies. And I think that just goes back to the professionalism, like always try first to start there and see where you can work out different things. And like you said, what could I maybe do that wouldn't align for both of us? And then have that same question for your co-nanny. But then if it becomes an issue farther than that, like I said, there should be some sort of person, whether it's household manager, family assistant, HR, somebody that you can lean to to maybe discuss something along those lines.

SPEAKER_02 41:27

And I'm just gonna add asterisk. I don't want to go down because it's a little bit of a bunny hill, but the follow-up to your question in the chat is it would 100% be something reportable and report that to your bosses or somebody who can stop that because that's a safety concern. If it crosses over into safety concerns for the children, then that that's where I think the come to them first goes out the window.

SPEAKER_00 41:54

Yeah, yeah. Um first and foremost, we're all mandatory reporters.

SPEAKER_02 41:57

Yeah, yeah. So if you're concerned about safety in those ways, if if you if those are behaviors happening, then go ahead and report that. Yeah, no, when I say yeah, no, I'm in the chat.

SPEAKER_01 42:15

No, when I think about it, it's like the somebody uses the toilet paper one way and somebody else uses it in the I think issues like that, like you you guys can work on that. But no, if it ever comes down to a safety or security issue, security too, if you're working for a high net worth, ultra high net worth is a big thing. So uh it's not even like just safety that can go directly to people. I think security needs to be looked at very highly as well in these positions. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 42:40

Dealing with these small non-safety related issues, this is really where you're tapping into your professional muscles of this is a professional household. Like any office job, you might not get along with the person in the cubicle next to you. But how are you going to handle that with professionalism, calmly, emotions removed, just clearly stated facts and solution-minded? And that's what we have to do in these households. It's not, it's a it's a different level.

SPEAKER_02 43:12

Totally. Yeah, it's a different environment, but you gotta bring the same professional mindset to those conversations. So I love that. No more heavy, scary stuff. Now we can totally have even if there's questions, but I'm really excited. What are the fun things next topic you guys? What are the fun things that you asked for when it comes to negotiations? Because I know a lot of people in our last were kind of like asking for a list in the last, like, what are all the fun things you can negotiate? And so I know you guys are starting thinking about that more. What when you're coming down, yeah, what are the baddest things? I know we talked about clear, but what else are you asking for in those contracts when you're negotiating?

SPEAKER_01 43:52

I think I it's like it's so different for everybody. I hate to say that over and over, but it really is, and what your job looks like. But I know people that have asked for gym memberships, well, especially while they're on rotation, if you're a rota nanny, like car cleanings if you use your personal car. But I feel like that could go. I mean, you don't have to be a rota to like want that part, like with those extra asks.

SPEAKER_02 44:11

I was saying, yeah, these are could be universal things that anybody can ask for, right? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 44:15

And then, but first class travel when you're a traveling rota for various reasons. I think that's one of those things. I don't know, I wouldn't expect it in every contract, but it is a big ask that like you very likely could get if you're asking. And then the use of like vehicles while you're the if you're a livin' or if you're a rota, the use of their personal, their vehicles for your personal use. I think that's just set in stone. Like they that's a ask that you definitely need to like that you could ask for. Yeah. And then all meals during your rotation and travel days, I think that's another one that's just should be included. But yeah, and I Caitlin, I think I mentioned like we're had suggested like professional development and stipends for all your education expenses. So if you want to talk more about that, but I think that's so great to have.

Building Trust To Negotiate More

SPEAKER_00 45:02

Yeah, I'm a big proponent of professional development, whether that's them covering your CPR in first aid recertification every year, or if you're I went to class for laundering and learning how to remove stains. Yeah. There's like allergy related to children. So you can continue your education within the household for the Benefit of the household. But I also just found out about this educational assistance program. Clearly, I'm very excited about it. It's another program that is a reimbursement from your employers:$5,250 a year that they can pay you tax-free for vocational, for college, for master's program, for technical training. It doesn't have to be related to your work, but that's a benefit that your employer can provide. So something else that you can consider if you're wanting to continue your education in another way or, you know, in child development. One of my favorite ones is a Rhoda Nanny, which it's gonna sound so small to people, but it was so impactful for me. I asked for a 5% bonus of my gross income for my entire year, which as a Rhoda Nanny, you know, you're getting up there in some good change and to receive a large payout at the end of the year is really lovely. So that was really fun. I thought about adding in, I haven't yet, but an added PTO every year, just having it in my contract that way, again, I don't have to renegotiate, I don't have to ask for it, but it's already written in my contract that each year I get an additional PTO. And if my employers decide that they want to cap that, then that's fine. But then I'm, you know, gaining more vacation, which is also great. And then we didn't actually do it, but it was a consideration when I worked for my ultra-high net worth high profile family. We're out in the world a lot, and we were with a high-profile family, and we were asked to present ourselves in a particular way. And so we were going to ask for a uniform clothing stipend, which we didn't actually ever do. But that is something that people have asked for. You know, NCS asked for scrubs, you can ask for for any of that. I know New York nannies oftentimes will have polos with the family crest on that are provided from their employers. So I didn't know that. Yeah, it's really those New York City nannies.

SPEAKER_02 47:41

Oh my goodness.

SPEAKER_01 47:42

But yeah, I think also with that, if you go to a lot of events, if you are required to attend a lot of events, specifically like very professional or high-end events. I've seen it where that's in a lot of contracts. You get a set of money for those clothing items if you are required to go to a lot of them with kiddos until, yeah, if you are and don't have that in there, it should could be something you could talk about.

SPEAKER_02 48:07

No, that makes a lot of sense.

SPEAKER_00 48:08

Sorry, about like the clothing, like stipends and whatnot. I oftentimes don't ask them for a set amount. I leave it very open-ended, knowing that it's a discussion even after they state a price. But I let my employers you know lead that.

SPEAKER_02 48:26

Yeah. Absolutely. I would say something that I think is really interesting. And you know, you guys are so good at like how do you bring it up with these, especially those last ones you just mentioned, the gross income, the added PTO, these are things that are like growing every year. It's also a retention strategy for the employers, so you can bring it to them in that way. You're not getting that 5% bonus until you make it to the year. So it's a it's that's how you can bring it up to them. And it is something that on the employers, it's a benefit as well to see you not only happy and you know, retained, but then also knowing that you're gonna get that when you make it to the end of the year helps you with your longevity as well. Yes, a hundred percent. Amazing. But how do you you know create the professional relationship and how do you nurture that relationship to be able to have those bigger asks? You talked about having the some things in your contract from the beginning, but then it sounds like some of the things you bring in maybe later is an ask or once you've built some rapport. So how do you build that relationship to feel confident in these asks?

Read The Contract: Habits & Tools

SPEAKER_00 49:35

Yeah, you know, it's it's time, it's consistency, it's follow-through, it's open communication with your principals and your team. You know, it's just it's little choices each and every day that that build trust, like any other relationship, any friendship, you know, any dating relationship, any of that. Like for my employers, I really listened to their concerns when I was interviewing. So my cat decided now is the time to go up the window. Her concern, while they are very affluent, they they like to manage their money very closely. And as a family assistant in this position, I have access and need to use their funds for daily household supplies for vendors, for any of that. But I want them to know that I value their dollar just as much as they do, if not more. So I'm leaving receipts, I'm asking for approval, I'm sending invoices prior to scheduling the vendors, I'm letting them have that control. And then there's been areas where they've said, you know, you just hire whoever. We we know that you've got you've got it. We know that you're gonna, you know, interview several people, get several quotes, you got it. But that's because I built that trust with them and they know that I value their dollar. I'm gonna make sure that we're getting what we paid for and we're gonna get the highest quality of service provided. And then, you know, I'm just consistent with that constantly and I'm filling them in however they preferred. Sometimes it depends on the week if it's by email or if we're having an in-person conversation. You know, I mentioned at the beginning that they're traveling this month, and I'm home, they're home, doing family assisting. And I created an entire sheet with all of the tasks that I saw that needed to be done, all of the tasks that they saw needed to be done. I put my contacts in there when I'm starting a task, when I'm completing a task, any notes and any of the any amount that I've spent on the task. And they have complete access to that sheet. It was in lieu of me checking in with them daily so that they could actually unplug and have, you know, some relaxing family time, but they're able to be a part of that daily list or the tasks that are being done. I'm putting in, you know, very thorough notes for my own records, but for those as well. And so those are the things that I know are important to them. They want to be a part of that pulse in the house, even when they're not there. And I've learned that through listening, through conversations, consistently checking in. And now I'm able to tailor it to them.

SPEAKER_02 52:26

I bet that makes it a whole lot easier when they know how much you value their dollar when you come and say, hi, I deserve this in my new contract, and they can trust that you're gonna deliver the quality uh for it that you're asking for. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 52:44

I want to protect their funds. That is that's job security for me, right? Yeah. So selfishly, I will do whatever I can to ensure that they stay exactly where they want to be.

SPEAKER_02 52:57

Yeah. Absolutely. I love it. We are, of course, once again running out of time. Um, and I know you guys wanted to leave everybody with this thought at the end of what what do you do once you negotiate this contract? What is the part that everybody leaves out? And can so can you leave some folks with some final thoughts tonight? Uh what contract? I've never read my contract after I signed it. I've heard that lots of times.

SPEAKER_00 53:28

Print it out, consult it every month. I I say at least once a month. Read over it, make sure that you're getting your holidays off that you have written in there. Make, you know, track your PTO and your sick time right on there. Leave it out in a communal space. We have a household binder, mine stays in there. So my employers can easily access it. I can easily access it. But one of the my most favorite things that I'm learning how to use, because yes, I'm still learning too. When my employers make a request of me that I'm unsure of, instead of just my default, yeah, sure, that works, which has been a detriment to me several times. I use it as a pause, like, let me look at the contract and then I'll get back to you. You know, can I check in with you for in an hour or whatnot? But then I'm making sure that I'm honoring our contracts that we agreed on and that we we knew was fair from the start, which is really nice.

SPEAKER_01 54:25

I the same way. I've always had a family binder or nanny binder that I've created that I've used it from anything to like keeping track of tasks, cue, medicine for the kids, schedule, all that kind of stuff. And my contract is one of the first things in there. It's usually the first or the second. And so it's always just around. So that if I ever do need to locate it and look at it and figure out what it's at for some particular reason, it's always been around and it's always been in the binder. So that's been really helpful to have. And then obviously on my computer too, if I wanna check it later at home. But yeah, just having it printed out can do wonders and having it nearby.

SPEAKER_02 55:02

Yeah, I love that. Just like being able to pause and use it as oh, nope, we can refer to it to even give yourself a minute to process. It doesn't even have to be you don't even have to guess go refer to it, but even as a tool, oh no, we're gonna look at that, even just to let yourself process is great. Yeah, so we are totally out of time because he's been so amazing. We want to make sure everybody knows that if you will be at INA conference in Denver, and that Caitlin and Tori will be speaking and sharing more on this topic. So come show and they will be they will be there. And I'm so excited to hear more um from them in Denver. Caitlin amazingly already got ahead of me and just dropped her Instagram social media stuff in the comments. Um Tori. Amazing. There's something else. Nope, that's it.

SPEAKER_01 55:53

Okay, Tori, if you don't, I don't remember what your handle is because it's oh yeah, mine's at Tortor underscore blanchard. Um it's in the chat. I put it.

SPEAKER_02 56:04

There yellow, there it is. Beautiful. Caitlin dropped it for us. Amazing. So if you want to grab those, follow these two beautiful women and keep up with them.

Closing Notes & Where To Learn More

SPEAKER_01 56:12

And please come up to us at INA if you are there and we don't already know you from various aspects. Like I I always am looking to meet more nannies and people in the community. So please don't hesitate. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 56:25

Absolutely. Yes. Hopefully, we'll see lots of you there. Thank you guys so much. As always, it is a pleasure. Thank you, everybody, in the chat, for being here. And we will see you next time. Everybody.