Growing in Life + Business: What I'm Learning in the Messy Middle

Have you ever thought you were headed in one direction, only to find yourself on a completely different path? That's exactly what happened to me at the Modern Elder Academy (M.E.A.) as part of a leadership accelerator program. I went in expecting a DEEP dive into business, but what I found was something far more profound: a complete shift in the way I see personal growth and transformation.

This isn’t your typical “business as usual” episode—it’s my personal reflection into how we grow, transform, and evolve as entrepreneurs and individuals. I’ll be sharing personal stories (including that one time I went on a three-hour hike in high tops) and practical takeaways that you can apply to your business and life today.

This episode is my way of keeping a promise I made years ago: to share what I’ve learned so you can avoid some of the mistakes I’ve made and grow your business with clarity and purpose!

Click play to hear all of this and:

(00:03:01) How a hike through New Mexico ended up not being about nature (at all) but about uncovering deeper connections and unexpected clarity

(00:06:01) Biggest takeaways from the M.E.A. experience and how they reshaped the way I approach life and business

(00:06:58) Why the questions you’re asking yourself might be the very thing holding you back—or propelling you forward

(00:08:00) The power of having a “wisdom book” as the secret weapon you didn’t know you needed

(00:10:40) Redefining disappointment and learning to use it as a tool for recalibrating expectations and reality

(00:12:33) The concept of liminality—the in-between space where growth and clarity often begin

(00:13:37) The anatomy of transformation, starting with the courageous act of letting go

(00:17:09) Navigating the messy middle—the hardest yet most transformative part of any big change

(00:20:25) The key ingredient for stepping into the next chapter of your life

(00:24:20) The difference between a fixed mindset and a growth mindset and why it matters in transitional moments

Listen to Related Episodes:

• How to Ask Questions that Get Results
• 7 Pivots in Business Led to THIS Moment
• How to Build Your Self Trust to Make Better Business Decisions

📧 Join my Newsletter for a weekly cocktail of insider business strategy, personal reflections, and the journey of being a thought leader: https://jasminestar.com/newsletter 📧

For full show notes, visit jasminestar.com/podcast/episode524

Transcript

Jasmine Star 00:00:00  And when I said, this transition is about me, this transition is about looking about the next big thing that I'm going to accomplish. This transition is about taking all of these lessons that I felt like were losses, and actually realizing that there were lily pads to success. Welcome to the Jasmine Star Show, where we talk about business mindset. And today, reading from my journal. Let me dive in. Arrived yesterday not knowing what to expect. I thought this trip was supposed to be about business development, but I was so wrong. I am pretty sure this place is all woo woo. Personal development, but beyond a shadow of a doubt, I know I'm supposed to be here. They call it mid-life transformation. How to be purposeful, how to design a career and a life you love. That was a journal entry from September of 2024, but I should probably back up and let you know how I ended up in this spot. I was part of a leadership accelerator program, and part of it was getting together with a group of entrepreneurs, and I literally thought I was going to New Mexico to talk more about business.

Jasmine Star 00:01:03  Lots and lots of business. And so I went with my business hat on and there was a shuttle. It picks us up from the airport, and we're driving through New Mexico, and there's this tiny little artsy town, and then we continue to keep on driving. It's about an hour and 25 minutes later that we pull up to this big expanse of land of nothingness, and we go through a gate, and then we drive another ten minutes up into this beautiful area called Mia Modern Elders Academy. And we get out and we're greeted with hugs and hellos. And I immediately knew this place is a little bit different. Everybody here was very I don't know, woo. It wasn't business, it wasn't corporate. It was a lot of like hugs and looking at each other's eyes and saying, I'm so happy you're here. And I thought to myself, okay, did I miss the memo? And I should probably back up, because this was a program that ended as part of a graduation program that we had been going through as part of this leadership and accelerator program.

Jasmine Star 00:02:02  And when we got there, we were guided to our rooms, and that's where I read the itinerary. And the itinerary was all about making big changes to who you were as a person in order to become a different business owner. That's fine. I just had no idea. And that's what actually I was going for. And so we changed and they said, everybody put on your bathing suits. We're going to go up and wear casual clothes. We're going to be doing a mix things, having lunch. You can go by the pool, we're going to take a hike. And I thought, okay, great. So there on our gear went and we had lunch at the name. Okay. So Chip Connelly is the owner and co-founder of Modern Elders Academy, Mia. And he graciously opened up his home on property to guide us there through lunch. So we had this beautiful, amazing organic farm to table lunch. And some people swam and we talking and he had said, can I take you guys on a hike? And as we went on this hike, I don't know, I'm a city girl.

Jasmine Star 00:03:01  And so I just went in like, you know, like Nike high tops and, like a sweater. And I'm like, I have no idea what I'm doing. And I will tell you that it was very warm and it was very serene and the wind was blowing. And there were times that you're having these conversations with other entrepreneurs talking about what they were doing and how they were growing, and then there were times of just complete silence where you would see birds flying and there would be bugs jumping from one leaf to another, and the sun is dripping through all of these wild trees. And there in New Mexico, the rain comes out and it washes out all of this beautiful red clay. And so your feet are literally crunching and cresting this beautiful red clay. And you could tell that all of this had been imprinted by water a thousand times over and out of nowhere. I'm walking about 4 or 5ft behind Chip, and we see this beautiful white owl dart out in front of us. And I was like, this is incredible.

Jasmine Star 00:04:03  And Chip said, I've lived here for years and I've never seen a white owl fly crosses during one of these hikes. So you know what I do? And I'm like, I gotta make a note. What does a white owl mean when you see a whale? And when I looked it up, it said new beginnings. And you're looking for wisdom in new beginnings. I thought to myself, okay, so there. I thought to myself, this is not what you had expected, and you weren't really in the place to feel like extra woo or connected with the earth. But you're here and you're going to make the best of it. And I've always learned that even when things are unexpected, that I get to choose the emotion that I apply towards the business lesson. And so there, after this hike that I thought was going to be like, I don't know, 25 minutes and it being like three hours, y'all, I am not a hiker. I didn't take any water. I was completely not ready for it and I was covered in red clay, got back to the room, had a quick shower, and then we went and had this beautiful dinner, and they set up a bonfire outside, and they had somebody playing a harmonica and a guitar, and they had a sing along.

Jasmine Star 00:05:05  They literally printed out songs in a songbook, and they passed out these songbooks like a hymnal. And there we are, like on Native American land singing songs. And everyone's like, oh, this is so fun. This is a sing along, and every song was country. And I should probably make a little bit of a side note here. I had never heard a country song until I was in college. I was a sophomore in college when I first heard country music. I know 19 years old. I went 19 years without ever hearing a country song. And so while everybody's sitting around this campfire being like, oh, we love this country song, everybody knows the song, I was like, I have no idea what this song is. And everybody's singing and they're s'mores. And I thought to myself, okay, Jasmine, don't have any judgment, don't have any judgment. You're just going to sit along and there's this. Sing along and there's bugs in the air. And that's okay. You're just going to have a Kumbaya moment because the person that came to me cannot be the same.

Jasmine Star 00:06:01  And so what I want to do in this particular episode is talk to you about the main key takeaways that I learned at Mia so that you can apply them to your business. However, you don't have to go through the bonfires and the long hikes and the bug bites. And like the super Woo, we want to talk about where we started with this. And so I'm going to walk you through three key main takeaways now as I am in 2025 and beyond. What I was realizing is there was we had to do a deep dive on two types of questions. There's diagnostic questions versus generative questions. Now, if you've been listening to the podcast for a while, I did an episode where I was breaking down what I called dead end questions and revival questions, and this was the exact same thing that we had talked about, but hearing it from a different perspective. So dead end questions are diagnostic questions. These are all about facts. These are the things that will keep us stuck. Like what's wrong? And generative questions.

Jasmine Star 00:06:58  Revival questions are going to be like let's look for what's possible. So if you're in the middle of something, you're like, why doesn't this work for me? Why does it take so much time? Those are dead end. We don't actually have answers, but you can actually have generative questions or revival questions where it's asking, what could I do to fix this? What can I learn? How might I grow? What am I not thinking about that I could be trying again now, the thing that we had to do there at me, which is what I want you to do right now, is to ask yourself what type of questions am I asking myself in my entrepreneurial journey right now? Am I asking myself diagnostic questions like questions that just leave me feeling stuck and powerless? Or am I asking myself generative questions? The minute you start asking yourself generative questions, it helps you get unstuck because it forces you to have your mind think in new ways to get out of the same situation. Now, in order for us to actually go back and learn from this, Chip explained to us now Chip Conley, he was brought on as an advisor in the early days of Airbnb, and he was part of the whole scaling process of the team at Airbnb.

Jasmine Star 00:08:00  He has a ton of experience and a lot of wisdom, and he was talking to us about how he created a wisdom book. Basically all he did was he took time to catalog the lessons that he was learning along the way. Now, as I was preparing for this podcast, I went back into my journal from the notes that I had taken from there. And have you ever been at an event where you take notes and you're like, yeah, this is a good thing. This is going to be one good thing that I'm going to use. Well, I went back to those notes and I realized that I really love this idea of a wisdom book. And in preparation of this podcast, I realized, you know what? You never started that book. So I started it here in my journal. At the end of every week I go through, and I'm listing what I learned that week. It could just be like 2 or 3 things. But in order for me not to repeat the same patterns, in order for me to grow, in order for me to get back to a similar situation but have a different outcome.

Jasmine Star 00:08:48  I need to say what did I learn last time and what am I applying it with a new lens to the next thing? How do I stop repeating the same dang mistakes? How do I learn faster and get better? So he had said that once he does this once a week, he started learning that your painful lessons are the raw materials for your success, your painful lessons. So whatever you're going through right now, that's going to be the things that you look back at some point in the future and say, that was preparing me for the success that I have today. And oftentimes what we want to do with our biggest achievements is that we are basing our success on our great life achievements. And he says, no, no, no, it's not about life achievements. It's about the lesson that we're learning and that we're sharing with others. I really liked this point because this podcast has become a way for me to share the things that I'm learning. With every episode that I create. I literally go back into my journal and I'm saying, what did you learn? Because selfishly, the podcast has been a way for me to document what I'm learning and going through, but unselfishly, altruistically.

Jasmine Star 00:09:49  What I'm trying to do is have you not repeat the same lessons. So as part of this lesson book, I've been able to create podcasts documenting as well as outlining the lessons. And he had said that the older that we get, the more experience we have. The information that we're learning crystallizes. It comes impression in our brain so that when we're faced with this situation, our brain, as long as we're cataloging the lessons that we learned, as long as we're cataloging, we'll look at the situation and we say, okay, this lesson taught me this. This lesson taught me this, this lesson this. The more lessons that we learn, the better our decision making comes. Because our wisdom has become crystallized. We're no longer just taking a guess. We're saying, I learned the lesson. I documented the lesson. I taught the lesson. Now I get to apply the lesson. So what happens is, when we're learning lessons, there's this temptation for us to be disappointed. When you're going through something, you're going to be frustrated.

Jasmine Star 00:10:40  You're going to be embarrassed, you're going to feel overwhelmed. And all of that is disappointment. And he had said, have you ever taken the time to actually have the definition of disappointment? He says the definition of disappointment is expectations minus reality. What did you expect to happen and then take away what actually is? Whatever's left over that's disappointment. So if you had a ton of expectation and the reality was this much, your disappointment is going to be very large. So what happens is that lessons inform our reality and calibrate our expectations that if I have enough reps, if I have done the same thing over and over and over again, if I have a ton of lessons where they're going to calibrate what I actually think is possible. So often in the early entrepreneur journey, people believe that they're going to have all of these outsized outcomes. I'm going to make all this money. I have all these clients and have all of the success. And then all of a sudden the reality is taken away and they're like, oh man, whoa, wait.

Jasmine Star 00:11:41  I feel disappointed. Well, right. It's not because you're not destined for something great. It's just that you're disappointed because the expectation outmatch reality. But the more lessons and the more reps and the more clients, and the more gigs and the more no's and the more yeses that you get, it informs what you can expect in the future. And then it's calibrated and then you actually feel, hey, I'm actually doing small wins to get big gains. So how do we uplevel our crystallized intelligence if we are actually taking a diagnostic of all the lessons that we're doing so that we're crystallizing what it is we're learning, how do we do this? How do we how do we get better every single time? Well, Chip explained it in two ways. Number one, liminality. And number two, the anatomy of a transformation. So I'm going to explain each of those in the section. So he asked us do you know what being liminal is. And it is the space in between two things. When you're in limbo, that's liminality.

Jasmine Star 00:12:33  When you're like, not quite sure you're not stuck, but you're not quite sure that's liminality that is standing in the in-between. And entrepreneurs, statistically, entrepreneurs are more comfortable with liminality than non entrepreneurs. That's why if you're an entrepreneur you are crazy. You are more okay with uncertainty. You are more okay with liminality. You are more okay with being on the in-between than the average person. But even with our overextended, even with our higher capacity for liminality, there are times that we do feel a little stuck, that we feel stuck on the in-between, that we feel in between a rock and a hard place. So maybe your business has plateaued. Maybe your business has declined. Maybe you're just tired of your business. Are you stuck in that place of liminality? When we know it's time to change, we have to face and have the courage to make those changes when we know it's time to change, to get out of a plateau, when we know it's time to change. Because we need to grow the business.

Jasmine Star 00:13:37  When we know it's time to change because we need to try something new in the business. We have to understand the anatomy of a transition. What actually happens as we changed. Now, I learned this so well at Mia that when I actually took what they taught and I applied it back to my past and my history, I realized that I was okay in liminality, and I realized that I was actually in a transformation. Now I can go through right here on this podcast and read from my notes and talk to you. Oh, this is exactly what had happened. But recently I explained the anatomy of a transformation at a mastermind that I hosted for seven figure entrepreneurs who want to scale to eight. And so what I'm going to do is instead of making it picture perfect, I'm actually going to be sharing with you right now video and audio from that experience and how I explain the anatomy of a transition in raw and real time, I'm going to play that right about now. I kind of wanted to end this first mastermind, And we're just getting started with something that I learned from a recent event I was at, and they were talking about the anatomy of a transformation.

Jasmine Star 00:14:49  And so many of us join this mastermind with the desire to change, grow, get unstuck, shift our systems of belief. And so I just wanted to repeat back the anatomy of the transformation that many of us are really familiar with. But as a reminder is the anatomy begins. The anatomy of a transformation begins with an ending. And the thing about endings is very similar to how I spoke this morning on how to encourage me to write a letter to the old dream and think it for what it was and acknowledge it. So if we want to step in to something else, if the goal is to scale to ten figures, we actually have to have an ending. Now we get to choose when that ending is. But many of us in this room know that the ending is now, or the ending is near the ending of the person who got you to this point. We'll have to become an entirely different person to get you to the next point. James Wedmore has always told me that what brought me here won't get me there.

Jasmine Star 00:16:00  And what brought you here won't get you there. So if then we have to acknowledge that an ending is part of the anatomy, then what I want us to do is to commemorate it. My goal was to at least, and at bare minimum, have things here now that empowered you to commemorate the thing and the person and the woman who brought you into this room. But as you go back, you can't say that you're the same person. You have learned too much and you know too much. And so part of journaling, part of writing yourself a letter, part of toasting, part of us having a meditation was to open yourself up to the possibility that you can let go of the person who took such good care of you to get you here. And we love that person. And we think that person. And if we were being kind to ourselves, we would say, you did the best you could, baby girl. You did the best you could, but you are not going with me to the next thing.

Jasmine Star 00:17:09  And what I want is to do is to be kind to the commemorative person and thing. Because what we thought was so cool in becoming a caterpillar will no longer allow us to become the thing that we are destined to become. Which leads us to the second part of the anatomy of the transformation, which is the middle, otherwise known as the messy. That's right. The messy, the breakdown. Okay, okay. When you are in the messy middle, the biggest thing that has impacted how long we stay here isn't money, isn't knowledge, isn't education, isn't network is what energy mindset ourselves, how long we stay in the middle is by ourselves. Mindset, energy, what we choose to believe in. The messy middle. I can do it. I can't do it. I want to do it. I don't want to do it. It was lucky, I am unlucky, I am lucky. This here is a system of belief that until we actually take control and define, what do we want will empower us to get to the third and final step, but it is in the mess that what we want to do is just stop or go back to the place we just left.

Jasmine Star 00:18:42  But we all know we can't ever go back and be that thing. We can never be in love with the idea or the business that brought us here the way that we were when we started it. It's physically impossible, but what we want to do is to go back to that longing moment in time, knowing we're so different now. So we fight and we say we want to go back, and then we fight because we want to get to the next thing. It isn't until we've identified, I am good with this next thing, and I'm ready to sunset, and I'm so ready for that pain in my life. But if you are not ready for that time in your life and you are not ready to sunset and you are not ready to stop, the only option you have is forward. How long you want to stay in the messy middle is on us. How long we want to choose. Fear, doubt, uncertainty and unknowing is a Choice. It is a hard choice to think that everything is conspiring in your favor.

Jasmine Star 00:19:34  It is a hard choice to believe that what got you here are just the tools and the things that you will need to get you to where you want to go. It is so hard to believe that somebody is going to come along in your path, intercept you, and say, you can do this. I'm going to show you how. And so what happens is that we walk alone again and again and again, wishing that somebody would just see us and find us and give us a throw us a bone, give us a check. Why does this support give us the magical connection? And so we long for these things, realizing that the only way somebody will write you a check or throw you a bone, or get you an invite, is when you have the willingness to walk alone and make it a reality. The only time we ever reach to the next step is when we have the courage to do it on our own, and then people want to come in. But the parts from getting to the middle to the courageous takes a lot of work.

Jasmine Star 00:20:25  And so what I want the mastermind to do is to accelerate the amount of courage and grit and hotspot it's going to take for you to get to the third and final point in a transformation. Oftentimes when we talk about a caterpillar into a butterfly, there is this component of a chrysalis. And I think that at least for me, I had the idea that once the caterpillar transforms inside of the chrysalis and then pulls out, I think that that butterfly twitters away. But many times that is not any of the case. The butterfly sits in the chrysalis for a minute. The butterfly pulls out of the chrysalis, the butterfly waits. And there are even times that we have seen over science that the butterfly comes out of the chrysalis along a flower or a tree and falls, and that is where we have to then take another courageous decision to say, I am a butterfly. It's. I have to figure out how to fly. So many of us are not at the starting of something new, unless we actually had the courageous decision to say, I'm going to work through it, because we can't get to the beginning until we've commemorated an ending, until we have done the hard work that is the messy, until we've made the courageous decision to choose a different set of beliefs, until we have commemorated and said and departed to the person who brought us to this point, and to be those brilliant, foolish women who believe that we can do the impossible.

Jasmine Star 00:22:07  But we wouldn't dare to believe that had we not already done it. So what I hope is that this marks the beginning of something new for you, and what I hope is that over the next eight months, that when we feel that we are either out of the chrysalis, sitting on the chrysalis, or having fallen down. That we around us will say, I know who you are, and we're going to wait for you to find the strength to fly. To find the strength or the span of your wings, and to know the color of the person or the thing that you've become. And so I have to say thank you for being a part of this mastermind. And thank you for showing up fully as you are. Thank you for holding space for us. Thank you for pushing and believing and challenging and holding your own. Thank you for wearing clothes that make you feel 100% like you. Thank you for encouraging people to do things that we don't otherwise do. Thank you for making the courageous decision to show up despite of mental health insecurities family reinvestment.

Jasmine Star 00:23:12  Thank you. So talking about a transformation is one thing, but going through a transformation is something else entirely. When I was at me, I heard somebody say that mindset is the water a fish swims in. You don't even notice it. Like how you see and apply a situation is something that you're not really aware of. However, when you become aware of the water that you swim in, it changes and informs how you act and the decisions that you make and the perspective that you have. So how can you access the mindset that you need in order to facilitate and expedite a transformation? What mindset do you need as you go? Now we're going to compare the two. There are two types of mindset that you can have in a transformation. You can have a fixed mindset and you can have a growth mindset. So if you have a fixed mindset, when you're in transformation, when you feel aka stuck, when you feel like you're caught between a rock and a hard place, when you feel like you're in liminality.

Jasmine Star 00:24:20  When you feel like you're in between. You can think in a fixed mindset. And when you're in a fixed mindset, you have to try to prove yourself. When you're in a fixed mindset. You're trying to optimize what you have. You want to keep what you have safe. You want to protect it. When to close it off from losing anything. You're in a fixed mindset when winning is the only option. I must win, I must get these results. It must look this way. You have a fixed mindset. If in the process of doing what it is that you're doing, you're comparing yourself to others. You're critical of yourself. You're critical of others. You have a fixed mindset when you're comparing yourself. And then what happens is that you're beating yourself up in the process. If you are on the in-between, if you're stuck, if you're going, if you're in a place of transition, if your business has plateaued, if your business needs to change, if you're tired of your business and you are beating yourself up and you're comparing and you're trying to prove yourself and you're trying to save what you have, and you think that winning is your only option.

Jasmine Star 00:25:20  Friend, you are dwelling in a fixed mindset and if you have a fixed mindset, it is going to be so hard for you to transcend. It is going to be so hard for you to go through that transition. So if you are in that place and you have a growth mindset or you want a growth mindset, this is what it looks like that in the middle of a transition, when you're in liminality, when you're in the middle, when you are stuck, you're improving yourself. When you are caught between a rock and a hard place, you are defining success as learning, not success as just getting results. A growth mindset is about improving yourself is about learning lessons. Is that your point of view is focusing on yourself, not on others. You have a fixed mindset when you're going through a transition. When you're in liminality, you say, this is me against me. I used to think that competition was me and everybody else doing, trying to do what I was doing. But really competition in my point of view is I'm focusing on me being the best version of me.

Jasmine Star 00:26:24  That's a growth mindset. A growth mindset is simply asking yourself, did I do my best not comparing what you did to anybody else? It's simply asking, did I do my best? Because if I did my best, what more could I ask for? And celebrating that your best today was better than your best yesterday and your best yesterday was better than the day before. A growth mindset is enjoying the process, not just the progress. So when you are caught between a rock and a hard place, if you're in transition, if you're in liminality and you are saying I must win, it must look like this I'm going to hedge my bets. I'm going to optimize what may have I'm going to prove what I have if I find myself comparing, that is a fixed mindset. But if you're on the in-between, if you're in a transition, you're trying to get your business out of plateau. If you're trying to grow your business, if you're trying to add new things to your business and you know that things need to change.

Jasmine Star 00:27:17  And you're going to say, I'm going to be focusing on the lessons. When you're focusing on the process, not just the progress. I'm going to be improving myself, and I'm going to know that success is about learning things. Success just isn't about results. Because if what happens during your transition, you have a fixed mindset. You're going to limit your options. Why you're going to play games. You only know how to win because it makes you feel good. You're saying, you know what? When I'm stuck on the in-between, I can't take any losses. I can't take that I'm too fragile. Or can you say, I'm going to take a loss and understand that the loss is not a setback, it's actually a set up. When you optimize what you have with that fixed mindset, you're not going to be looking for new opportunities for growth. When you have a growth mindset and you're like, what can I learn? Who can I meet? What can I pressure test? How can I grow? What new thing can I try to get me a different result? Man, the way that you go through that transformation, the way that you uplevel, I will tell you that every six years.

Jasmine Star 00:28:16  My career has gone through a transformation, and every six years I can look back and say that there were transformations that happened easier than others. It was when I wanted to protect. What I had is when I wanted to win at all costs. When I was focusing on how I was doing in comparison to others, was when that transition took the longest and felt the hardest and was the heaviest. And when I said, this transition is about me, this transition is about looking about the next big thing that I'm going to accomplish. This transition is about taking all of these lessons that I felt like were losses, and actually realizing that there were lily pads to success. And so when we think about mindset, I actually did an interview last year with Ed Millett, and I'm going to link to it in the show notes. It was a great interview, and in the interview Ed had said, oh, Jasmine, I had explained a story about my adoption process, and I talked about how I felt like I had a fixed mindset when it came to adoption that I couldn't be a mom, that I would never be picked.

Jasmine Star 00:29:16  The process that had been like three years. It was a bunch of closed doors, and I explained how I was going through that process with a fixed mindset, and Ed stopped me and said, you know, Jasmine, you've been on a podcast before. I would never think that you were the person who had a fixed mindset. You always seem to me like a person with growth mindset. And I said, oh Ed, I am. But not all of our thought patterns fall into one category. So where do I find like I have a growth mindset? Man, I have a growth mindset around strategy. I have a growth mindset around business. I have a growth mindset around marketing. I believe that everything is a game and that we're all winners and it's us against us. And at the time, I didn't realize I had a fixed mindset around becoming a parent. And so my question to you right now is itemize. Where do you have a growth mindset? I believe you have a growth mindset around some things.

Jasmine Star 00:30:08  Maybe you have a growth mindset around parenting. Maybe you're like, I can be the best parent. I'm like, great about this. This is fun. This is great. And then you might have a fixed mindset when it comes to your finances. I will tell you, I work through having a fixed mindset about being a tech founder, that I'm excited for the future that I have with tech, and yet I have to actively rewire my mind because I think to myself, I'm not a developer. I don't know the next best path. I've learned as much as I can without doing more. That's a fixed mindset. It's so tempting to compare, like what I'm doing with tech to every other tech founder, and know that girl like you ain't even in last place like everybody. Has the race already done start. You have even crossed the starting line. That's how I feel. But I have to actively say this is you against you. Can you become a better tech founder today than you were yesterday? Can you gather yourself around other people who know more, and who are willing to invest to help you grow and get to where you want to go and be? So I want you to take a step back and say, where am I? Growth and fix mindset.

Jasmine Star 00:31:10  Itemize it. Own it. Study it. Bring pathways in to rewire your brain. So now after you've itemize this, we become aware. And the reason I'm having this conversation on the podcast and sharing these lessons is because the minute I became aware of this in 2024, it really did set me up for a powerful 2025. I came into the year totally different. I came into the year saying, you have a book full of lessons. I came into the year by saying, even on the days that you will say, this used to be a fixed mindset, I'm going to choose a growth mindset. It's me against me. Am I better today than I was yesterday? Can I surround myself with people who are going to be doing things differently? Better? Challenge me. Inviting me. Can I look at the process and enjoy it? Can I look at the journey and say it's not about the destination? Because when you get to the destination, you're going to wish that you enjoyed the process more and I hope the same for you.

Jasmine Star 00:32:13  As a brief recap of what we went over today, we started off this conversation with asking, are you presenting yourself with diagnostic or generative questions, diagnostic or dead end questions, generative questions, or revival asking how you might do something instead of saying why isn't it working? We have to be able to answer these questions, because if we give a question to our brain that it knows it can answer, it will find the answer. So we need to start asking generative questions. Then we focused on documenting the lessons to crystallize our intelligence. So once we learn our lessons, we document the lessons. And then we teach those lessons so that when we are presented with another situation, we could run it through our crystallized intelligence and make better decisions and shorten our learning curve. Then we walked into the anatomy of a transition, and I shared with you an inside look at a mastermind when I taught it in real time, raw, real and revealing. And then we ended by talking about the differences between a growth and a fixed mindset.

Jasmine Star 00:33:12  I wanted to take this opportunity and create this for you, because when I started my career in 2007, I flung myself on my bed and I was so frustrated because I said, if only I had somebody who can explain how business works. If only I had a mentor, if only I knew what to do or what to avoid. And it was in that moment that I was flung myself in the bed in our apartment, that I made a promise to God. And I said, God, if I ever have success in my business, I promise I will share what I know with others. And so this podcast is just that. This is me staying true to the promise that I made, that I will share what I know. I got into this room and I went to this center, and it was beyond a shadow of a doubt, luxurious and amazing. And it also cost a lot of money. This executive group coaching program was tens of thousands of dollars, and I understand that that is not a luxury that many people have.

Jasmine Star 00:34:15  So what I want to do is I want to put you in the room with me. I want to take the lessons that I learned so that you can apply them to your business so that we are growing together so that you have a growth mindset, so that you're asking yourself generative questions so that you have your crystallized intelligence. It would mean the world to me if you found this at all interesting or helpful. Can you share this episode with somebody? Can you just send it to them and say, hey, I really think that this would be valuable or interesting to you so that we can grow together. And if you happen to be the person who's listening to this, who had a friend, a family member, a loved one, send it to them. That person is sending it to you because they care about you and they want what is best for you. I want to say thank you so much for listening and watching Jasmine Star Show. I am so thankful that you're here.