Do Not Dwell on Defeat by Jerald Simon

I'd like to welcome you to my podcast, "Music, Motivation, and More - The Positivity Podcast."

My name is Jerald Simon, and I am the host of "Music, Motivation, and More - The Positivity Podcast.

I am the founder of Music Motivation® (http://www.musicmotivation.com) and the creator of the Cool Songs Club (https://www.coolsongsclub.com).

In this episode, 009 - "Do Not Dwell on Defeat", I talk about the following:

1. Intro/Opening: Do not dwell on defeat. Feelings of defeat will destroy you.

2. Positive Perceptions: "Do Not Dwell on Defeat..." pg. 35 and "If you don't attempt something..." from Perceptions, Parables, and Pointers by Jerald Simon

3. Motivation in a Minute (a motivational/inspirational topic): "Adversity introduces a man to Himself..." pg. 172 from Perceptions, Parables, and Pointers by Jerald Simon

4. The Music Within: Inner Peace by Jerald Simon (from the album "Chasing Clouds" meditation music - by Jerald Simon

5. Poetry that Motivates - "Defeat" pg. 88 from my first poetry book, "The 'As If' Principle" (motivational poetry) featuring 222 motivational. inspirational poems I have written.

As a music educator, I have written 25 music books featuring original music I have composed and teaching piano students worldwide about music theory, improvisation, and composition. I refer to them as Theory Therapy, Innovative Improvisation, and Creative Composition. You can learn more about the various music books I have written on my website, http://www.musicmotivation.com. -

I began composing what have become known as Cool Songs to help motivate teens to want to play the piano - the FUN way. You can learn more about the fun, COOL SONGS I composed each month that have accompaniment minus tracks so students can play along with drums, guitars, keyboard synths, and other instruments and sound effects on my COOL SONGS website at https://www.coolsongsclub.com -

Here is a link where you can download a FREE PDF book on motivating teen piano students ("20 Ways to Motivate Teen Piano Students to Want to Play the Piano - the FUN way): http://www.coolsongsclub.com/freebook. After entering your email where you'd like the FREE PDF sent, the page will then refresh and you can learn more about the COOL SONGS Club.

You can join the COOL SONGS Club FaceBook group on my COOL SONGS FaceBook group page at this link: http://facebook.com/groups/coolsongsclub/ - If you know anyone who would be interested in joining this new group, please invite them. I'm excited to share ideas, suggestions, and hear your thoughts, ideas, and tips on motivating and inspiring piano students - the FUN way!

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

And most people don't realize that these feelings of defeat, if we dwell on the times we have lost the times, we have stumbled at the times, we have failed in the past, these feelings of defeat will actually destroy us because they will prevent us from progressing today and improving to become better tomorrow than we were yesterday.

Speaker 2: 0:32

[inaudible]

Speaker 1: 0:32

welcome to music motivation and more the positivity podcast. I am your host, Gerald Simon. Every weekly podcast is sponsored by various businesses, groups, associations, and organizations. Today's podcast has been sponsored by the cool songs club

Speaker 2: 0:59

[inaudible].

Speaker 1: 1:00

The title of today's podcast is do not dwell on defeat. And so I'd like to begin by talking about how these feelings of defeat will eventually destroy you. And most people don't realize that these feelings of defeat, if we dwell on the times we have lost the times, we have stumbled with the times we have failed in the past, these feelings of defeat will actually destroy us because they will prevent us from progressing today and improving to become better tomorrow than we were yesterday. So today we're going to talk about how not to dwell on feelings of defeat. So to start out with today's podcast, I would like to read on page 35 from my book, perceptions, parables, and pointers. And it says this, obstacles are opportunities. Realize that setbacks only temporarily suspend success. You can and will overcome any obstacle. Perseverance always produces results. Do not dwell on defeat. Do not wallow in the well of worry or be fenced in by fear. Learn from your past mistakes and move forward. When something doesn't go as planned or you make a terrible blunder and you feel that all is lost, simply begin again. The old adage, if at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Is as relevant today as it ever was. Mistakes can be mended, some take more time to resolve and others less. But every problem has a solution. We may not like the solutions at first, but as every question needs an answer, every problem needs a solution. Take a look at the problems you face each day and tackle them one by one. Ask yourself this, is this truly the worst that could possibly happen to me? Is it the end of the world is all lost? After asking yourself these questions, you will see the answer is no. This will never be the worst anything for you unless you dwell on your problems. Bury yourself under your burdens and commit yourself to constant chastisement. If this is the case, you need to change. Remember, obstacles are opportunities. Now I'd like to think about that entire paragraph for a minute. There are so much that we can talk about and so much that we can focus on just in those few paragraphs and it begins and ends with the same sentence. Obstacles are opportunities, but how many of us actually look at obstacles as opportunities? I know in my own life, looking at an obstacle has not felt like an opportunity. It has felt like pain a problem, but as I stated in this paragraph, every problem needs a solution. Now, how do we solve the problems in our lives? We take it one step at a time, one day after another, day by day. We should try to focus on the problem at hand. I think far too many people focus or worry about problems that don't exist and many never will exist because we either worry about what is in front of us and what is going to happen or what we think may happen or we stress and worry about the problems that have been in the past. Now, many times, either we have created problems for ourselves or others have created those problems for us and those problems that have been in the past, they are behind us and should be behind us for a reason. Sometimes it's difficult to move on because we have memories. Those memories both good and bad. They shape and mold us. They have us become who we are today. But if you allow past memories to control you, then your life spirals out of control because you are allowing feelings, thoughts, emotions that are being stirred up in the present from experiences in the past. And those create new problems. We do not need to allow the pains and the problems of the past to prevent us from progressing today and improving tomorrow. But we all have pains. We all have problems. We all have moments when we have felt defeat. Maybe we think of it as a failure. Now, I truly believe that failures, if we let them can become our friends because with every failure it becomes a step forward. Now most people think of it as two steps backward because they think that the failure prevents them from progressing well. Every time we fail, we learn something new. It helps us see differently because of the experiences we've had. We can have both good and bad experiences and both can teach us and train us. Both can help us, but if we allow those experiences to stop us from trying from attempting, then those experiences hinder us and they don't help us. Which is why in the paragraphs I read in the second paragraph I said, do not dwell on defeat. Do not wallow in the well of worry or be fenced in by fear. See, fear creates offense. Sometimes it's imaginary, but more often than not, it is a very real fence and we fence ourselves in because we are afraid to try. We are afraid to fail. And if we are afraid to fail, then we are afraid to succeed. We need to get over that fear of failure, that fear of defeat, because that will help move us forward. That we can try. Try again. No matter how many times we have failed in the past or felt as if we have been defeated, I'd like to read another section from my book. Perceptions, parallels and pointers, and this is found on page 52 this is what it says on page 52 what I wrote. If you don't attempt something, you won't achieve anything. Those who never try do not succeed because they have never experienced failure to improve and progress. You must experience at least to some degree, defeat failure, setbacks, roadblocks, trials and problems that help you look for solutions, find answers and adjust. Rethink, reevaluate, and redo what must be done to turn things around. You never know what you can do and what you will accomplish until you try and see. We don't know what we can accomplish. We don't know what the limits are to our own success, our own talents, our own understanding. We can do more than we think we can. We can learn more. We can accomplish more. We can become more than our limitations will allow us to, which is why we should never limit ourselves for the motivation. In a minute portion of this podcast, I would just like to read one quote. It's anonymous, but this is what it says. Adversity introduces a man to himself. Now, I would update that to adversity introduces a man or a woman to himself or to herself. Adversity introduces a teenager to himself or herself. Adversity is not a bad thing and yet sometimes we have these adverse thoughts or feelings toward adversity because we are afraid that if something or someone is pushing us or pushing against us, we won't be strong enough. That is how we are strengthened when we have more wind, when we have more storm, it helps us become stronger. You think of a tree, well, as the tree grows and the wind comes, the wind signals to the tree that the tree needs to send down more roots, deeper roots to help the tree withstand the force of the wind. See the wind actually strengthens the tree and the wind and the tempests that come to each of us can strengthen us. They can help us be stronger so that we can strengthen those around us and help them that they may become strong. We must not dwell on defeat, but how do we do that? How do we not dwell on defeat? If you watch any news program, if you read any newspaper, you will quickly realize that tragedies travesties terrible, terrifying, and trying times sell it's news. The media are much more apt to share what is going wrong with society because the bad disturbing headlines they sell newspapers. See, it's the tragedy of our times when we have become so accustomed to having bad things happen that many people often look for it and even expect it. Now that brings pessimism and I believe that pessimism is a poison. I believe it is a pollution on our minds, on our hearts, our thoughts, our ideas, our ideals. When we are pessimistic, we poison ourselves and we poison those around us and some people mistakenly think that they are realists. I believe that a realist is nothing more than a pessimist who is trying to pretend that they are not as dark and dreary and gloomy as the rest of the world would see them or believe they are. There is a stark contrast and a difference between being an optimist, a realist, a pessimist, and I believe, and it's my own feelings, my own thoughts, but I believe we all should become more optimistically minded in how we think, how we view the world, how we act, how we treat others, how we speak, how we react. It goes back to the golden rule being kind. That is how we do not dwell on defeat. We do not allow ourselves to become pessimistic and if you do not allow yourself to be pessimistic, then you must try and strive to be optimistic. But that takes work. It's much easier to be pessimistic. It is much easier to find fault with others and to complain. You can hire anyone to demolish a building. I usually tell elders that I am very good at taking things apart. It does not matter what it is. It could be an electronic device, any technology, a vehicle, you name it, I can take it apart. Now putting it back together is a different story. I'm not very good at doing that, but I'm learning. I'm trying. I want to learn how to be a better mechanic. I want to learn how to be a better electrician. I want to be able to put things back together. I can easily take it apart. Putting it back together and having it work takes practice. It takes learning. It takes a skill and we can easily tear someone else apart. We can say negative or hurtful things to anyone and unfortunately in today's society, since we have such a presence on social media, far too many people will say things on social media because they're typing it that they would never say in person one to another because they feel as if they can be hurtful and they're hiding behind the screen. But again, anyone can tear down. It takes a craftsmen to build up. It takes a master builder, an architect who has practiced and perfected the art of building to put things back together. And so it will take some work for us to be optimistic because first we need to think optimistically. After we have changed the way we think, then we need to change the way we speak. See, we cannot speak optimistically until we begin to think optimistically because our thoughts will naturally emerge from our mouths and what we think will then come out of our mouth because we speak that which we think so. First we need to change our thoughts to be more optimistic, to be positive, to be kind, to look for the good in everything and in everyone. Once we change our thoughts, then we can change our words. Once we change our words, then we can begin changing our habits. What we do day in and day out. We need to change how we speak to others, but also how we treat others. And that means we need to change how we treat ourselves. See, if you dwell on defeat, you are going to think about negativity. If I personally am dwelling on defeat, I will think about how terrible it feels to have been defeated or to fail. I will focus on the negativity. Instead of trying to come up with a solution, I will relive and rehash the problem over and over again. And by doing so, what happens is I then begin to think and rethink and overthink about what is negative, what is not going well in any situation. And by focusing on the negativity, I lose sight of the positivity and that positive outlook becomes out of focus. So I need to change how I think about things. And that encompasses how I think about me, how I think about my own ability to improve, to be better, to learn, to grow. I need to change the way I think about life in general. For the music within portion of this podcast, we are going to listen to inner peace. And this is a composition that I composed from my meditation, relaxation album, chasing clouds. It features meditation music. So I'd love to have you listened to this and let me know what you think.

Speaker 2: 18:46

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Speaker 3: 23:42

Now that album chasing clouds, meditation, relaxation,

Speaker 1: 23:46

music, and a lot of chiropractors, massage therapists, a lot of spas, they like to use that music because the music is set at 60 beats per minute, and our heartbeat responds to rhythm. The first thing that happens is our heartbeat begins to mimic the pulse or the rhythm, and since it has set at 60 beats per minute, our heartbeat begins to slow down and we begin to naturally calm ourselves down by listening to something that is set as slower pace for the poetry that motivates section of this podcast. I would like to read a poem I wrote from my book the as if principle. And this poem is titled defeat. Listen to this defeat. It's easy to quit and most men do. They quit and give up before they're through. They throw in the towel and quickly retreat. They give into fear and embrace defeat. They say they can't, even if they can, for the fear of failure destroys the man, the arrows of anger, Pierce's soul, corrupt his character and take control. But there is no defeat until the man thinks he's beat for the strength of a man are the words I can. And if you think about that in life, that is the way every day presents itself to us. When we first wake up in the morning, we have the option, we can advance and we can fight or we can accept a feat. We can wallow in the well of worry. We can focus and be fenced in by fear or we can do something that takes courage. It takes faith, it takes hope, it takes perseverance. There is no defeat until the man thinks he's beat for the strength of a man are the words I can. And of course I would include the strength of a man, the strength of a woman, strength of a teenager, strength of children. If you think you can do something, you will do it. You will work as hard as you can to learn what you need to learn to master. The skills that you need to master to understand the principles. You will do what it takes because you believe in yourself. Now, if you can surround yourself with loved ones who believe in you just as much as you believe in yourself, then you will have an army of people who love you and support you and strengthen you. But even if no one believes in you, even if you stand alone, if you will believe in yourself, if you will, focus in faith on what you fear most and hope to overcome. As you strengthen your optimistic outlook on life, you will defeat the negative nemesis that surround you. You will continually surround yourself with a positive persona. It's a positive energy. No one can make you unhappy. No one can make you afraid. No one can take away the successes, however small they may be from you. They are your successes. No one can force you to fail. No one can cause you to collapse and try to frighten you. To be afraid to try. You are in control of your own life. You are in control of your own life. We all are. We must have faith. We must have hope. We must focus on what we can do. Yes, we all have strengths. Yes, we all have weaknesses, but as we focus on our strengths, we will strengthen those weaknesses, the failures that we have, they can become stepping stones to success, but we need to be optimistic. And first and foremost, that means changing your thoughts. How do we change our thoughts? One of my favorite books to read, and I encourage everyone to read this book. As a man thinketh by James Allen, it will revolutionize the way you think because you realize that the thoughts you think can create within you the strength you need to fight your daily battles. The thoughts you think can weaken you, they can empower you, you can be a great force for good, but you need to think for yourself. Don't worry about what others think. As we become more in control of our own thoughts, we can become the masters of our self control. It takes self-control to stop thinking negatively. It takes self control to stop speaking negatively about others, about ourselves, about our weaknesses. It takes self control to realize that we are in charge of our destiny. Beginning with today, we can be the ones to pave the way, but it will take effort. It will take a great deal of sacrifice and we need to be ready. We need to be prepared and part of that, first and foremost, we need to believe how can we believe? If we don't think positively or optimistically about ourselves, about our own abilities, about our own capabilities, we are capable of much more than we are currently able to do, but we need to increase our level of understanding to know that our ability will continue to improve and increase as will our capability. If we think we can do something, we will quickly realize that as we think those optimistic thoughts, they will then empower us to do what it takes to do the work necessary to move from our current circumstances and maybe our state of inactivity to our future and potential state of possibility. As we shift from thoughts of negativity to thoughts of positivity, we begin to see ourselves in a brand new light. We see those around us. In a completely different way because we believe and that belief then empowers us to go and do what needs to be done to accomplish the task at hand. If that task is finding a solution to whatever problem we are facing today, we can then have the strength to do so because we have the belief in ourselves because of the positive thoughts we have told ourselves and the positive words of affirmation. We have spoken to ourselves and those around us believe and you will achieve, do not dwell on defeat, overcome any negative thoughts you may have by focusing on the good today. There is good within everyone. Find the good. There is greatness within you, your potential, your possibility. It is there and as we focus more on what we can and will accomplish and do in life, we stop thinking about what we have not yet accomplished. We stop worrying about what we failed to accomplish in the past or the defeat, however temporary it may have been in the past. We stopped focusing on our failures and weaknesses and we begin believing in our possibility that paves the way for our true potential, that true potential increases and improves because we begin to see more clearly than we ever have seen anything before in our lives that positivity can actually improve and overpower negativity. I have seen it work in my own life. I've seen it work in the life, the lives of my children, my family. As we go about doing good, good things will happen. It's a universal law. It's a spiritual law. It's a physical law in that as you go and help and do and serve, even if nothing happens to you, even if no one serves you back, if no one gives you anything back, even if no one does anything for you, just the fact that you have done something for someone else helps you see yourself in a new light and that empowers you to do more. Be thankful. Be grateful for what you have learned for what you are learning for what you hope to learn. Be thankful. We have been so richly blessed in so many ways and we can share those personal blessings we have with others. We can share those blessings that we have with others and everyone can improve and progress and I hope we all do that and think about those things. So thanks so much for listening. Keep up the great work. Smile all the while. Have fun. Do your best, continually improve and be your best each day. Be better tomorrow than you were today. Improve progress and help those around you do the same. I'll see you next time. Thanks for listening guys. See you. Bye. Subscribe to music motivation and more the positivity podcast with Gerald Simon to receive updates about each new weekly podcast. Every Monday a new podcast is released to help motivate and inspire individuals to learn to grow, to do, to be and become the very best they can become. These are all motivational messages that inspire men and women of all ages to do and be their best, to set goals, to work on improving who they are and who they would like to become. Thank you again for listening. Connect with us on social media to become part of the conversation as we all work together to motivate each other to do and be our best. You can learn more about my music and various books I've published by visiting my website, music motivation.com my music is available on Spotify, Pandora, Amazon, iTunes and can be found on all online music stores and streaming science. My motivational books and poetry books can be purchased on Amazon from Barnes and noble, various online bookstores and also traditional as well. If you'd like to learn more about motivating and inspiring piano students, please visit my website, cool songs, club.com to learn how and why I began composing what had become known as fun, cool songs. These cool songs were composed to help motivate piano students the fun way, especially during their teenage years. So I hope you check it out and please feel free to contact me if you have any questions about anything. My contact info is found on my website, music motivation.com but I would love to connect with you and if you have any questions, please feel free to reach out to me. Thank you again for listening. Hope you guys have a great week. See ya. Bye.