What Does The Bible Say?
30 Minute Discussions Of Bible Subjects
What Does The Bible Say?
What Does the Bible Say About Marriage?
In this episode, Arnie, Fred and Glenn begin discussing what the Bible says about marriage. We start by noticing what Isaiah says about the attitude of a newly married couple, their excitement and how they present one to the other. It is noted what Malachi says to a husband about how he treated the wife of his youth and what God thought about that. We move on to what God said to Adam and Eve in the beginning and how Jesus went back to this time in correcting the Pharisees in what they had done to God's marriage law. We note what Paul said about being joined to a harlot and what that meant. Paul wrote to Timothy telling him that the scriptures provide everything to men for them to be completely furnished to every good work. Consequently, God has supplied all the guidance we need to live in such a way as to be pleasing to God, in particular relating to our marriages. We look at several passages that Solomon wrote concerning finding a wife and how valuable this is to us. Paul provides guidance about a wife's relationship to her husband as well as the husband's responsibilities to her. Peter gives us similar guidance. We discuss both of these references. Take about 30-minutes to listen in on our discussion. Have your Bible handy so you can verify what we are saying. There is a transcript of this Buzzsprout episode provided for your convenience.
This is a presentation of the Woodland church of Christ meeting at 3370 Broad Street in Sumter, South Carolina. We meet for worship on Sunday at ten thirty am and five thirty pm. We meet for bible study at nine thirty am on Sunday and seven pm on Wednesday. If you have questions or comments on this lesson, you may email them to Fred Gosnell at fgosnell@ftc-i.net or to Arnie Granke at agranke440718@twc.com or to Glenn Landrum at s,c,b,a,m,a,b,o,y2003@yahoo.com.
Arnie:Oh, Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen, this is what does the Bible say? I'm Arnie Granke with the church of Christ at Woodland. Fred Gosnell and Glenn Landrum are with me. Unfortunately, Eric couldn't be here as we're recording this. Hopefully he'll be back next Lord's day with us. And what does the Bible say? Is designed to teach you just exactly that on a variety of subjects. We're not just stuck on on one particular aspect of the Bible. But in fact, we would even welcome if there was a question that you had and wanted to know some information about a particular Bible topic, we would be delighted for you to be in contact with us. You can reach me at 803-840-6693 in Sumter, South Carolina. We would be glad to take your request and and deal with your question for for you. What is it that we're looking at this Lord's Day, Glenn?
Glenn:Well, we're going to be talking about marriage. We're going to be talking about basically the definition of marriage, and this would be the Biblical definition, how maintaining a biblical marriage protects us from sin, and marriage is confines. Now a passage I'd like to open with is Isaiah, 61, 10, it reads, I will greatly rejoice in the Lord. My soul shall be joyful in my God, For He has clothed me with the garments of salvation. He has covered me with a robe of righteousness. As a bridegroom decks himself with ornaments, and the bride adorns herself with jewels. Well, we've opened this in this study with this passage, because it displays the attitude of a husband and a wife, or at least the attitude that they should possess. We know how excited men and women are at the beginning of their journey together, and how they want to present themselves to each other. They want to show their best selves. We believe that we will be able to show in this lesson that this is the attitude that God wants us to have towards our mates throughout our marriages. We will show biblically what marriage is and the relationship of man to woman and woman to man. We need to do this because the subject has become clouded and many say and teach different things about the marriage God intended,
Fred Gosnell:Yeah, and of course, we're going to see what biblical marriage is. But before we go there, Malachi made astatement. Couple of passages in Malachi, chapter two, and notice, notice what he says in verses 14 and 15, he says, Yet you say, for what reason? Because the Lord has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you have dealt treacherously. Yet she is the companion and your wife by covenant. But did he not make them one, having a remnant of the of the spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring. Therefore, take heed to your spirit and let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth. So So notice, first of all, that marriage is referred to as a covenant between a husband and a wife. That's, that's a contract. Of course, one, one of the problems we have is, you know, people look at marriage as a contract, and then they look at it kind of the way that the world looks at it. Well, since it's a contract and things aren't working out, well, I'll just avoid the contract and I'll go elsewhere. Well, the intention is that God's intention is that marriage is a contract, a covenant, meant to be for life, and we'll see that. Of course, Malachi criticizes this individual for mistreating this the wife of his youth, and it was a treacherous thing that he did to her. So, so, and that was his companion that he began with. So we need to look at marriage as the way God intended it in the beginning, and we'll see that, and we'll need to remember that God being our creator, He's the one that knows what's best for us, and of course, he ends up holding us accountable for the things that we do in this life,
Arnie:As as we're looking at this, you know, a covenant, of course, it has an everlasting nature, and it's and marriage is meant to be for for life. So if we enter into our marriages, looking at them as as a covenant between husband and wife, or a final agreement with each other, almost like a contract. I guess you could say it could make a pretty big difference in the marriages be that you have, as as compared with some of the neighbors that you that you know that are having troublesome marriages. Here are a couple of passages of of scripture that I think are are kind of a good starting place to look at. One of them is in Genesis. Chapter Two. Two of them are in Genesis chapter two, but verse 18 is one of those. And the Lord God said, It's not good that man should be alone. I will make him a helper comparable to him or like him. And and of course, that was after God had created Adam. And I don't think that this was a sudden realization on God's part. He had planned this all along, but is explaining for mankind the reason, God's reasoning, in the kind of relationship that God has has given us, of husband and wife, not husband and husband, wife and wife, or four or five of one and one of the other, or anything like that. It's well planned out, one man, one woman, and that creates a marriage relationship. And then a second passage of scripture is in Genesis. Chapter two, verse 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And that's going to be a an important passage of of Scripture that we'll look for look at here in in just a second, I'll give you one more passage from the New Testament, this time, Matthew, chapter 19, and beginning in in verse four, He answered and said unto them, Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning made them male and female, and said, For this reason, a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife, and they too shall become one flesh. And of course, that's Jesus that's speaking there in in that with regard to the topic of marriage, and surprisingly, the the Jewish rabbis and and Jewish officials were quite far off base from what God originally intended with regard to marriage And and in the New Testament, Jesus puts that back as it as it ought to be.
Glenn:I'm going to continue on with that train of thought on those, those two passages, or three passages that Arnie read. But the passage in Genesis two was soon after the beginning, when God had created all things, including man. How long after? We don't know, it was probably very, relatively soon Arnie had mentioned this, that God realized that man he had created Adam was not complete and needed a help or a companion. One it was comparable or equal to Him. The second passage in verse 24 gives the perspective of the following generations in marriage that the man would leave his father and his mother to join his new helper or companion. The result would be that they become one flesh, or that they would become complete in one another. This implies that they were not complete by themselves. It also implies that the sexual union within the marriage they would become one flesh. Mark 10, verse eight and Ephesians, 5, 31, both bear out this same same thing. First Corinthians, 6, 16 supports this as well, even though it is speaking of a sinful act of fornication or adultery. When man and woman are joined together, they become one body. First Corinthians 6, 16 reads, Or do you not know that he who is joined to a harlot, is one body with her. For the two, he says, shall become one flesh. So whether in marriage or out of marriage, the sexual union of man and woman brings together two together to form one.
Fred Gosnell:And remember now that God is the one that has specified what what marriage is. And of course, if there was one thing that that Malachi said, one of the things he said in in Malachi two, verse 15, he said, Why one? He seeks godly offspring. So so from from God's standpoint, he establishes marriage between a husband and and a wife intended to be lifelong and and when somebody goes outside of this relationship and and has sexual relations with someone which is not his wife, then he is guilty of what fornication, because that's an unlawful relationship. When we look at Matthew 19, go back there and Glenn mentioned this. The Pharisees, what they had done, they had changed the law in what they did and made a whole bunch of traditional things. And they were divorcing their wives for various reasons, and they were trying to get get Jesus to to answer their question the way they wanted to. And of course, Jesus reminded them, Do you not know he which joined them and made them in the beginning, made them male and female, and said, This reason shall a man leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall be one flesh. So Jesus went back to the beginning to show the Pharisees and what God intended. So, s o they were using these traditions that they had made up themselves and that some of their ancestors had followed as a ustomed to become what was the normal thing to do. Of course, we kind of see that today. That's what men have done all through the ages. They get get tired of their partner, and then they decide they'll just go get a new one. So we need to make sure that we understand that God is the one that makes the requirement for marriage, and Jesus identified the beginning as the starting point for that. And of course, when people go beyond what God says, then what God has established, then they go beyond his approval, and there's there's no right for us to dissolve a marriage that and of course, God is a witness to the marriage, and there's the husband, there's the wife, and then there God is the other witness. So what do we learn from this? Well, we know that God created the man, then he needed to create a companion for the man. Of course, that was after Adam had had identified all of the animals and named all of the animals. Of course, then, then Adam recognized that there's nobody in this group that looks like me. And of course, so so God created the woman, and of course, he had them joined together to become one, and he has, simply by the action that he took, defined the boundaries of marriage. There's one man, there's one woman, husband, wife for life. That's that's God's intention, and that's what he intends us to follow what he has said. So as Christians, then we need to have a whole wholesome respect for God's word and teach that to others, and we understand that the Bible is the true and the right guide for us.
Arnie:Yeah, it's, it's a problem that we, that we face in our generation and and it's been so so for a long, long time there that others have tried to follow the Jewish pattern of making their own rules on the on the matter of of marriage, and that just won't work well with God. That's what Jesus is trying to to straighten out with some of his listeners, that it's one man, one woman. And as Fred pointed out, it's for life. It's it's an indissoluble rule that that God has. So, you know, if, if we as Christians have a wholesome respect for God's for God's word, we'll treat it as, as being something that has, that has no, no exceptions. We were either in the situation of doing what is right and and what is according to the authority of the of the Bible, or we wind up making our own rules and establishing our own ideas about how we think that that we should live. Paul writes to Timothy in Second Timothy chapter three, and beginning in verse 16, he says, All scripture is given by inspiration of God and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, throughly equipped for every good work. And there's nothing left out in in that passage, we would, we would almost dare you. You. We certainly welcome it if you wanted to to write us or call us and said, Oh, there's something else that's that's left out beside doctrine, reproof, correction, instruction in righteousness and and the completeness that that creates. We'd be glad to hear it. We'll certainly tell about it on the on the air, but I don't think you're going to find it. Do you? Do you Glen?
Glenn:No, I and we'll, we'll look at another passage in just a moment about this, this idea of us respecting God's word and believing what what it tells us. It's absolutely necessary for us to understand that what God's word is and that His word is has an authority over us, and we need, need to follow it. This very important passage as Christians, it identifies the function of God's word, what it does for us, how it would help us to mature. And another passage we will consider is First Peter one, two through four, Grace and peace be multiplied to you in the knowledge of God and of Jesus, Christ, our Lord, as His divine power has given us all things that pertain to life and godliness through the knowledge of him who called us by the glory and virtue by which have been given to us exceedingly great and precious promises that through these you may be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust. This passage in Second Peter further establishes that God's word is all we need for living our lives and being pleasing to God. So between these two passages, we've looked about God's Word, we learn what God's Word is is good for in our lives as Christians, and the extent of how much it applies. The Second Second Peter passage also lets us know that His word enables us to do everything he wants us to do through knowledge. Therefore it is imperative that we study, we learn and apply his word. This is true of our daily living, our worship activities, and our marriages. So let's take a look at a number of other passages that apply to marriage and the relationship of man and woman and God.
Fred Gosnell:Well, Glenn, one of the passages that we start with is in Proverbs, 18, verse, 22, and and Solomon writes it there. He says, He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord. So, of course, Solomon the wisest man who who ever lived. Of course, later on, we find out he wasn't so wise in his choices, however. Well, of course, what that tells us is, even though you may be very smart, sometimes your decisions aren't so great when you don't follow what God says. But nevertheless, He who finds a wife finds a good thing. He obtains favor from the Lord. So the Lord intends for us, to us men to have wives, and wives to have husbands. And of course, that would also apply to the husband, to the wife, finding a good husband. So it's a good thing for men and women to find a mate. And of course, the the reason ought to be very clear in the first place, that when we consider what God's purpose of creating a mate for Adam was. Of course, he told him to multiply. And of course, what we've already read that. God discussed with Adam, created the mate for Adam because he needed a companion or a helper. And of course, what we continue throughout life of our marriage is to remember and take to heart the these words. Of course, we're going to see soon some more about attitudes that we should possess towards our mates, so the best thing for us to do is to study our Bibles, find out what God intends for us, why he wants us to do things this way, and our lives will become much simpler in the first place, and they will be pleasing to God. Things will work out better always, when we do what God says rather than what we end up changing to to satisfy our own lusts, basically, and and desires.
Arnie:Alright. As as Solomon is, is writing in the book of Proverbs, in chapter 31 and and verse one, he, he forms it as a as a question, Who can find a virtuous wife? Well, it's not as it not as if that's such a problem, problematic thing there. There should be lots of possibilities there. But he's asking that as an introduction to to giving us the answer, and the answer that is that for her, wealth is far above rubies. And and I think freshly married couples that are still deeply in love with one another from their from their earlier days are probably have long been looking for this opportunity, and they think the same thing of of each other in in that regard. This passage, Proverbs, 31, is another one of Solomon's Proverbs, and identifies that a woman could and should be an extremely valuable companion for a man and and I think we can turn that around and say, say the same thing about both man and and woman. We know from scriptures like Second Thessalonians, chapter three and verse 10, that that men are supposed to work to support themselves and and we see others that show how he should care for his wife. And of course, when they begin to have children, he's responsible for caring for them as well. But we're not talking about children in the family yet, just husbands and wives.
Glenn:Yeah. Well, Ephesians 5, 22, through 29 which I lead into that, in my opinion, is an extreme import, an important passage, and we need to pay some particular attention to it. Wives submit yourselves to your own husbands as to the Lord, for the husband is ahead of the wife, as also Christ is the head of the church, and he is the savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of the water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself, for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. What a great passage that I believe we often take lightly. Think hard about what Paul, through the Holy Spirit, has said about the relationship of husbands and wives. Today, many don't want to accept this relationship because they believe that women are giving up too much power and autonomy to the husband. I would also caution men not to read too much into this, but to really think about what the scripture is saying. There is a reason. God has said for women to submit to their husbands, and you will find it in First Timothy 2, 11, through 13, which explains that Adam was first formed, then Eve. That might sound absurd to some, but when we have we have the right respect for God and His Word, we accept it for what it says. The husband's love and care for the wife is compared to Jesus Christ, who loved the church. Those were his followers so much that he was willing to give his life for her. Men should have the same attitude toward their wives, and should love them so much that they are willing to die for them. We as Christians should understand this about Christ and womenshould understand this about the man who her husband is, and follow this precept. Paul also gives the comparison of how we care for our own bodies. We do all we can to protect our bodies so that it remains healthy and free from harm. That is how a husband should care for his wife, nourish, care for and protect her from harm, just like we want to keep our bodies from harm or to keep from harming ourselves, men should have the same attitude towards our wives. Think about Jesus' teaching on the people dealing with other people, how we are to respect other people, treat them well, not slander them or speak badly about them. How much more do you think men and women should deal with their spouses? Men have been assigned a position of Head of the family, just as Christ is head of the church.
Fred Gosnell:Well. And you know, Peter said some similar things in first Peter three, one through seven. But one thing, sometimes people, some of the modern women, object to this, but, but we, we need to remember that that men and women are are equal in humanity, but they're not equal in function. We have different functions that God has given us. And so Peter adds some things. He says, Wives likewise be submissive to your own husbands. That even if some do not obey the word, they without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives. So sometimes women marry men that are not Christians. So there's a way for them to to be according to what God says. And ultimately, the the goal is that, well, if your husband is not a Christian, then you need to be able to teach him. And the best way to teach him is to behave in the way that God has intended you. So then he finishes, When they observe your chaste conduct acompany, accompanied by fear or by respect. So do not let your adornment be merely outward, arranging the hair, wearing gold or putting on fine apparel. You're not You're not saying you can't wear jewelry. He's saying that doesn't want that to be the the main thing that you have, he said. But rather let it be the hidden person of the heart with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which is very precious in the sight of God. For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord or master, and she was submissive to him, whose daughters you are, if you do good and are not afraid with any terror. Husbands likewise dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered. Of course, being the weaker vessel is not that she's weak physically, even though that's the difference between husbands and wives, the weaker vessel would be treat her like you would a fine piece of China that's very expensive. You're not going to treat that with no consideration. So at the beginning of this, Peter says the same thing about the wives saying to their husbands as but then he goes further. He gives good reason for that. So we as Christians are to be good examples to others, and this includes our spouses and children. So in this passage go, of course, it's saying that by being good examples to the husbands, the wives will be supporting their husbands and nourishing them, both in a physical sense and a mental, psychological sense. And he's if he's not a Christian, she has the ability to maybe teach him. So it's good for the wife to be a good example to the husband and vice versa. So look at the part about how the wife should present herself to her husband. Do not let your adornment be merely outward, arranging the hair, wearing gold or putting on fine apparel. Rather, let it be the hidden person of the heart with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God. How often do I actually practice this? Well, not worrying so much about the outward appearance, but inward personal appearances, showing that that beauty that cannot be corrupted and acquired a gentle spirit. The last statement is directed especially to husbands, honor the wife. And think of the situation in the marriage that the two of you are both inheriting the same thing, heirs together of the grace of life. So have you ever heard the statement made that a husband should put his wife on a pedestal? Of course, this is the idea that is being presented husband so honors the wife that he thinks of her in such a way that she is more important than any other human. Of course, he says that this may cause you to have a problem in your prayer life as well.
Arnie:Well, we'd like to continue this thought and and speaking about marriage next Lord's Day. And if you have questions, we we invite you to ask them. We gave you the phone number a few minutes ago. And and you can also write us at what's the Post Office Box number Fred?
Fred Gosnell:3171
Arnie:3171 in Sumter, South Carolina, 29150, and we would welcome your questions, if you have one. We look forward to speaking with you again next Lord's Day. And have a godly week this week.