SPEAKER_06 0:00

And together as you see the day approaching. Amen. Every time there's a chance to be in the house of the Lord or be be in prayer with folks, we need to make that attempt to be with each other because Jesus is coming back. And uh it's an exciting and wonderful time. Acts chapter 6. If you read it, there's a situation where there were the Hellenists, which were Greek-speaking Jews, and the Hebrew Jews were having a confrontation because there was uh sandwiches handed out, and they were favoring the Hebrew widows. And there was a confrontation, there was division, and there was uh chaos. And the apostles said, Man, we got to get some help. We gotta get some help so that there it relieves this division that's in the body of Christ, but also looks at every person equal in the sight of God. Amen. God shows no favoritism and he's no respecter of any person. And what the uh apostles came up with is that they would appoint men that were filled with the Holy Spirit, men of wisdom, men that exhibited the fruit of the Spirit, men that showed up every time that there was service, every time that there was ministry, these men showed up to serve and to love because they love Jesus with all their hearts, and they were called deacons. And the Bible says in 1 Timothy chapter 3 that it's a noble thing for someone to aspire and desire the office of elder, pastor, overseer. And then it goes into these qualifications of elders, and then 1 Timothy chapter 3, qualifications of deacons. And these guys were powerful men of God. There is no distinction in the house of the Lord. There's no titles, right? There's no positions, there's giftings, there's ministries, and there's the calling of the Lord. For elders, there's a special call on their life that they will preach the gospel, that they would uh fight against error, and that they would admonish, they would rebuke, and they would correct the church of God when they're going adrift. That's an elder's position. A deacon comes up alongside of the elders and ministers to the physical and material need. But man, the early church had a power some powerful deacons. Stephen in Acts chapter 6 preached such a powerful ministry, powerful message under the ministry of the Holy Spirit that their flesh was so aroused with hatred and vitriol that they picked up stones and they stoned him. Stephen was the first martyr of the church and he was a deacon. Amen? And before that, the Bible says that as Stephen ministered, handing out sandwiches, serving with all of his heart, he was moved in powerful signs and wonders, a deacon. Then you got Philip, who was also in this bunch that they ordained to hand out sandwiches, or whatever, maybe a kanish, you know, whatever they they handed out and they served. Philip was the one that was used by God to minister to the Ethiopian eunuch, transposed him right there, and ministered to that Ethiopian eunuch, baptized him, and then that Ethiopian eunuch went back to Ethiopia, saved and redeemed with an understanding of the gospel of Jesus Christ. These were deacons. Amen? The Bible says that if you aspire or desire the office of elder, it's a noble thing. Aspiration is this idea of studying the word of God, denying yourself, serving when you don't feel like it, being on the bottom, amen. And lifting everybody up, preaching the word of God and dedicated to the word of God. This is what an elder is. It's a calling, it's a gift, it's a grace. And I I would say if you are called to be an elder, but you can do anything else, then go do it. Because the calling of God is powerful. Then there's the desire. Amen. The desire comes when God calls you, when God moves upon your life and says, I want you. Just when he took Paul off the horse and said, Paul, are you kidding me? You're gonna fight me? And Paul said, Whoa. Gave his heart to the Lord, and then the Lord ministered into his heart for years before he even spoke a message of the gospel and grace of the Lord Jesus Christ. If you're if you aspire to an elder, you have a rough, rough life because it's gonna cost you. It's gonna cost you everything. It's gonna cost you getting down on your knees. It's gonna cost you offenses, it's gonna cost you brokenness, because the weight of the body of Christ and the family of God is on the overseer and the elder and the pastor that exercised oversight. That's why last week I asked for prayer. Amen? Because the burden is great. But you know what? I love the burden because I love to be in a fight. And I know my victor who is Jesus. Amen? And that is awesome. So we have a new phase that's coming into our church, a broader foundation of leadership that we want to engage in, and it's based on this biblical biblical text taken from Acts chapter 6, 1 Timothy chapter 3, where there are elders and there and there are deacons. Now, in the world, in the business world, the the cone of influence and success goes like this. At the top you have the CEO, and then you have the managers, the supervisors, and then way down on the bottom you have the pond scum that really do all the work, amen. But with the cone of success and ministry, the cone of servanthood goes like this. And guess who's at the bottom? Jesus. Because he came low and ministered to us in our brokenness, in our darkness. He came to minister even when we had our fists raised against him, amen. He is at the bottom because he humbled himself and came. And guess who's next? At the bottom. Serving, loving, giving is are the elders. Their life is to give and to serve with passion and with a purpose of leading everyone in a greater walk with the Lord Jesus Christ. Amen. And that's our call. So we are we are engaging ourselves as the leadership in this elder deacon relationship, and it's going to be a powerful, powerful thing. So I want you to pray for us. Amen? I want you to pray for us. Because there are men of God in here that serve in an unbelievable way. And when I look at them, I'm astounded at their heart for service and ministry showing up all the time. Whenever there's a need, there's there's they're there to minister and to serve. And you know what's great about deacons is they can see the need and have compassion on someone in such a great and wonderful way. And so we want to be praying about this leadership structure because the broader the foundation, based on the structure and the order of the word of God, the greater ministry that we have for the church, the greater ministries for each of you to be used in your giftings and the grace of God for your life. And also the wonder of bringing the gospel to the community, every man, woman, and child in Lackawanna knowing Jesus Christ. Is that your is that the way you feel about it, Fred? There was about seven or eight amen there, and it's probably about 80 people in the house, okay? So we're gonna say that again, and when you when we say it, say amen with passion and uh and excitement. And I hope I'm I'm annoying you today because that's that's my call, okay? Annoy you into the kingdom of God. Do you want to see our community, every man, woman, and child come to know Jesus Christ? Mary was right on it. All right, amen. All right, every one of you are gifted and graced by the Lord Jesus Christ to minister to this body in a wonderful and beautiful way. Don't doubt yourself. Amen. When Christ calls you with graces and giftings, he's the one that is the all-sufficient one to meet every need for you to operate in the giftings and grace that you have. It's not anything in and of us, not your good looks, not your charm, not anything that uh your education. It's the ability and power of the Holy Spirit in our hearts and lives. And that's an exciting thing, isn't it? Isn't that exciting? Amen. This way, no one can boast, but our boast is in Christ. Him crucified and risen. So be praying about our uh our our deaconship and the elders, and I want you to be praying about George, okay? You know, everybody knows George. All right, he's hiding behind the coffee bar. Everybody look back there, all right. George has served in a pastorate for years, and on June 4th, he's gonna be going before what I call the Sanhedrin, but it's not really the Sanhedrin, it's the uh the board of the assemblies of God to finalize him as a licensed minister of the gospel of Jesus Christ with the assemblies of God. Amen. Aren't you glad for that? Amen. And so the broader our foundation of ministry, we need elders, we need uh people that aspire and desire the noble office of being an elder, a pastor, exercise oversight. Now we have um we have several men and women of God that can preach the gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ. But I want to tell you that Darrell is an awesome teacher, amen, for our body. Do you agree that? And uh we're gonna throw him up behind the pulpit more and more. Same thing with George. We want to broaden our scope of influence and impact on this body of Christ so that when people come in, they get a full tsunami of the mission of what God wants to do here in Lackawanna, okay? So it's gonna be a beautiful, beautiful time, but I want you to pray. I want you to pray about uh deacons. There are men of God in this joint, uh in this place, this body of Christ, the family of God, that are servants. The word deacon, diaconos, means servant or minister. And isn't that what deacons do? Amen? As they minister the gospel through serving and fulfilling ministries and things of this nature. So it's gonna be an awesome and wonderful, wonderful thing. What are you aspiring for in the kingdom of God? What are you going after? What potential has Christ put into your heart where you feel the burning of the Holy Spirit ministering in your heart? You say, like Paul, woe is me if I don't preach the gospel. Woe is me if I don't fulfill the giftings and the grace that God has for me in the body of Christ, Steele City Church, amen. Here in Lackawanna. So we want to be excited about what God is doing. So, in that light, uh I love this phrase. I said that to say this is that let's pray now, okay? That God will lead us, broaden our foundation. And we'll allow, as the leadership here at Steele City Church, we would realize that we're on the bottom, serving and ministering and honoring one another, giving everything that we are, so that more would follow him and come into the giftings and grace that God has. Lord, we thank you for your church. We thank you, Lord, that you love the church and you gave yourself for it. We are the bride. And we thank you, Lord, that you are the one that gives gifts. You're the one that's graced everyone in this place that's in Christ to minister for you. And we pray, oh God, that we walk in the potential that you have for us. As we look into your eyes, you'll open the eyes of our hearts, and we will see the ministries and the passion and the purpose that you have for our life. From this point on, will be a new beginning in living our lives for the glory of God Almighty. And we give you thanks and we give you praise. We give you your church, it is yours, and we're thankful. The gates of hell shall not prevail against it. Amen. Amen. Bless you guys. Bless you, bless you, bless you, bless you. Let's pray now for our offering. We thank you for your giving. There's a lot of things going on. We're gonna need a lot of cash. And we thank God that He supplies. Amen. Amen. Our uh Jehovah Jirah, our provider. Lord, we thank you for everyone in this place. Thank you for their hearts in giving. And we pray that you'd multiply the money, Lord, and that the leadership we would understand the wisdom that you give us to use this money for your glory and for your honor, for your kingdom, for souls that will be saved. In the mighty name of Jesus, we pray. Amen and amen. Now, George is gonna bring the word of God, but first of all, let's just greet one another. But can you keep it to like two minutes? Okay? And then we'll call you all back. Greet someone that you haven't, greet someone that you haven't met, and uh give them a hug. In Jesus' name. Definitely not. Oh yeah. There's no place for our yeah, you know, I I thought I that was my mistake. I put it down somewhere. It's coming up on the two minute mark. We have uh we're gonna be diving into the word of God, and it's a great, great topic. Great to see everybody. God bless you. All right, let's uh let's prepare our hearts for the word of God. And uh it's gonna be a great topic this morning. And uh George will introduce it to you and preach the word of God. Okay, George, thank you.

SPEAKER_04 18:44

Hi, George. Hi. This is kind of cool. Maybe we can start over here. We'll just go one in individual. Hi! Hi George. Hello, good to see you. No. Yeah, yeah. Good old Mike. Mike is the wave killer. Mike's a wave killer. If we started over there with the wave, it would just die with Mike. So as as Pastor said, Um, we are seeing a new thing from God in our midst. Not a new thing overall, um, just uh an aligning more with God's order and and plan. And I'm really excited about that, um, just to kind of you know throw in there that when we walk in the plan of God, when we walk in in the lane that He's given us, whatever that is, you know, like it says, you know, in the scripture in Peter, that each of us ministering according to the grace that God has given us. You know, that that's that's what we're called to. And and and I I think about that, right? When we're all in our lane and doing what God's called us to do, that um it's like you know, in Exodus, it says, as that order comes in, that we all go to our homes in peace, in harmony with God, right? Knowing that what we're doing is what God has graced us to do, called us to do, gifted us to do. And and we now have that ability not to honor ourselves, as we move in God's, you know, God's order, scripture says, let someone else honor you, right? Let someone else proclaim you know how good you are. And and what it is, is we are now through what we're doing honoring God. You know, and and I think about that. And and and as we're about to to begin to talk about about marriage, which is a a significant topic in in the scripture, right? I mean, when God created Adam and Eve, he told them to go and do what?

unknown 21:08

Multiply.

SPEAKER_04 21:09

Multiply, yeah, multiply, right? Well, what's that mean? They're gonna sit down and start doing algebra? Have children, right? They're gonna they're gonna raise a family, they're gonna fill the earth, right? And and um, and and that's in essence what we're called to do, make mini-me's. Right? And and and that's you know part of what God has instituted family for, you know. And and so marriage is is a really significant aspect to what God has called us to. Now we have some that you know don't don't marry. You know, uh Paul seems like he wasn't married, and and and he called there that you know, some might be called to that. And if you are, that's a calling of God and a grace of God. Don't try and do that if God hasn't called you to it, because it's gonna be difficult. Right? And and and the scripture tells us that that marriage is a good thing. Now, guys, here's who guys that are married, here's an opportunity for you to get some opportunity to get some points. The Bible says that he that findeth a wife finds a good thing and obtains the favor of God. Okay. But but we we obtain God's favor. Because when you go back into Genesis and see that God created Adam, he found out that Adam he needed something. Right? God's completed himself and he's looking at Adam, right? And Adam wasn't God. And he's looking and he's realizing, wow, Adam needs something. And the whole process of time, when he created all the animals, all the fish, all the birds, right? We know the story, right? We all sat in Sunday school, well, some of us sat in Sunday school as kids, right? And we heard the stories of creation. A lot of us have read it, we know it, right? Anyone here not know the story of creation? The account of creation? Good. We can pass that one by. But it says that as he created those animals, he caused the he put Adam there and he caused those creatures to pass before him, and he began to name them. And in the process, it says, not a help meet was a helpmate was found for him. A help meet, excuse me. And the King James says a help meet wasn't found for him, right? And then he caused Adam to fall into a sleep. Pull out of Adam, scripture says a rib. Well, was it a literal rib or not? I don't know. We can talk about God, talk about that with the Lord when we sit in heaven, after we're called home and we're having a man a burger at the table and feast of the lamb, and we can say, hey, was that a real rib or not? Right now it doesn't matter. All we know is that God pulled Eve out of Adam. Right? Brought Eve before Adam and he said, because he had to name her, and he said, Whoa, man. Come on, that was good. That was a good dad joke on a Sunday morning. And he presented Eve to Adam and he called her woman, right? And and then God told them, as somebody said, you know, go and now populate. Okay? Now that word for help meet or help mate, it's a Hebrew word. Now, I am not pronouncing it like a Hebrew. If I was, it would probably be more something like it's a very hard language. Um, you know, in that it it's it it really speaks toward a sufficiency, bringing in that which is lacking. Now, again, guys, you want some brownie points? Are you glad for your wife that brings what you lack?

unknown 25:23

Yes, yes, yes. Thank you, Lord.

SPEAKER_04 25:27

Amen. Amen. And and we know, we don't have to get into it deeply here, right? But we know there is a distinct difference between men and women. Right? Thank God. Thank God for that. And we're not just talking physically. Okay? We're not just talking physically. That's significant, but not the big, huge difference. Women and men process differently, view things differently. Right? Like if you were to take the brain of a woman and compare it to something, it would be like a box filled with wires that mysteriously somehow, you can put them in all wrapped up, but when you go and you look later, they're all tangled up together. Somehow that happened. Because everything ties together somehow. With guys, we have a box, and in that box are a bunch of boxes. And in those boxes are even more boxes that contain things in a in their place. We can pull one out, process it, put it back. Okay? That's that's a distinct difference in the way we process things. So we have to understand that and know that. And as we come together, right, and both of us in our lane, a husband and a wife, all of a sudden now, we're complete. And we're not even gonna get into the emotional side of it. We're we're just not. Okay? We'd be here all day talking about that. Women, women, women respond with emotions in a way different than men do. Do men have emotions? Contrary to ladies, what you believe, yes, we have emotions. Contrary to what you think, we are not AI. We're not a we do have emotions. We we do. It's again, boxes. We got boxes. We got boxes. I don't know why. My ears feel really red. Are they glowing? They're red? Yeah, I don't know. It just happens. Again, you know, guys deal with emotions. We do. Again, think of the box. Guys have a bunch of boxes, in those boxes are contained what we're processing with the uh corresponding emotion. So we pull it out, we deal with it, we get it, and it all goes back in, back into the bigger box, up on the shelf. Ladies, you pull out, what do I have to make for dinner? Next thing you know, you're thinking six years ago with a conversation you had about your husband, about and every single corresponding emotion with that comes accordingly as you're pulling it out. Who's ever fished before done some crabbing or lob string?

unknown 28:33

Right?

SPEAKER_04 28:33

And you got a long line, no? Okay, forget that example. And crabbing, Maryland, right? You have a long line on that line, about every 12 inches, you tie a chicken neck or something like that. And you sorry, you tie something that would be very palatable to a crab, okay? And you begin to pull that rope out, and with it comes a crab after a crab after a crab as you're doing it. That's kind of like, you know, again, what we're what we're describing, you know, how that works. With a guy, it's it's a crab pot. It's just a cage down at the bottom. You pull it up, reach in, pull out the crab. Okay. That's a Maryland example of the distinction between how men and women process. You're welcome. So now here's something you know that I looked into, you know, as I began to look into the God's blueprint for a marriage. Among evangelical Christians, evangelical Protestant Christians, okay? And and you have Protestants and Evangelical Protestants, okay? Think of Protestants as the big tree and evangelical Protestants as a branch of it, right? And and there are distinctions between the two. Today's not the day to get into it, right? Um, but it's it it there are distinctions. So among evangelical Protestants, the divorce rate is 42 percent. 42 percent. That's pretty high. Out of a hundred, out of a hundred people, the average says, the statistic says, 42 will end up in divorce. That's pretty sad. And we have to uh begin to understand why did that happen? Well, immaturity, lack of an awareness of what the scripture teaches us a marriage is and the lane a husband's in, the lane that a wife is in, and the place children belong in it, the place work holds, the place friends hold. Okay, biblically, the scripture speaks very plainly to all that. Okay. Who wants to venture a guess among the rest of people that do not claim religion, what the divorce rate is there?

SPEAKER_02 31:05

60, 60, 70, 60.

SPEAKER_04 31:07

Fair? 50 50? 65, fair? 65, 50. 65, 50. These are fair. I mean, it's a reasonable assumption, right? Because every one of us in here has been touched somehow in a connection to somebody having been divorced, right? So it's pretty fair. 50, 60, 70. Okay. I wouldn't. If I didn't know, if I didn't know, I would say each one of you are probably right. According to Barna, 42% of non-believers, their marriages end up in divorce. What did I say it is among evangelical Protestants? 42. That's crazy. That's crazy. Now, you take that evangelical Protestant group that ends 42% in mar in divorce, if they are committed in living according to the Bible and attending church and the fellowship of believers, still a high number, but that divorce rate drops down between 21 and 29%. Why? Because in the assembly of the believers, in a life living and applying God's word, things find their place and an order is established, and we live our life based on that. Now it's still a high number and sad. I mean, would to God that true believers did not end up in divorce. But it happens. So what do we do? Well, we live our life according to God's word. We operate in the land, in the lane that God has given us. We view things biblically. Our view of the world, our view of a relationship, how we interact with the world, our spouse, our children, the congregation of believers, is based on how God views things. Okay. So 1 Peter 3, 1 to 7, just to read our text, says, likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be one without without a word by the conduct of their wives. Huge. When you see your respect when they see your respectful and pure conduct, do not let your adorning be external, the braiding of hair, the wearing of gold, or the putting on of clothing. But let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves by submitting to their husbands, even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord. Calling him Lord. Notice it's a it's a it's a lowercase L, right? It's a lowercase L. Guys, remember that. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered. Okay? He says likewise, we've dealt with that before here, and I want to call to your attention that he is continuing into chapter three, verses one through seven, based on what was described earlier in the preceding chapter, and how we relate to authorities, how we relate to employers, servants, masters, right? He's dealing with how Christians are to relate and interact in things of authority and relationship. Okay? This is no different. This is no different. All right, so he's going to begin to discuss how we relate. Now, it would almost seem unfair. There are six verses dedicated to women. Ladies, you got six verses. And guys, we got one. Yes, she goes, she goes, no. Um, it there are. There's six verses dedicated to women and one to men. But I want you to understand something. The verse dedicated to men is rich with depth, doctrine, and an accountability to the Lord Jesus. Okay? Because man was created to be the head. Okay? And as a husband, we are going to stand before the Lord and give an account on how we loved our wives. Because he tells us to love our wives even as, just like, in the same manner, according to the example that you've seen in Jesus, love your wives as I have loved the church. And to wives, he says, you know what? If the barn needs painting, do it, but that's not going to save your husband. To the husband, he says, Do what I've called you to do, because you're going to answer to me, son. Okay? So while we see six verses to the wives, we see one to the husbands, there's an accountability before the Lord. Okay, in that order. Okay? Each one of us has a responsibility to answer according to the works that were done in us and how we responded, what we've done, right? The parable of the stewards with the talents, right? Each one of us has to present to God what we did with what he gave us. But as husbands, we now have to answer what we did to now present our bride to Christ as Christ will present his bride to the Father. Okay? I'm getting chills on that one. Hopefully now my ears are turning red for a purpose. Okay? Because that's not a small thing when we understand the depth and the magnitude of that. Okay. So the design for marriage, God's design for marriage. Um whoever had this water, thank you for it. It wasn't? Oh. You heard a crack? I didn't. Um but that's okay. It's Sunday. All germs go to God and He blesses them and cures them. Um our scripture here, you know, back in Genesis, and specifically in verse 24, he says, Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. Okay? And it says there, hold fast. Okay? And in the King James it says, cleave. And it's really talking, if you would, about like a strong industrial glue. You know? That there's that kind of bond, you know, that can't be broken. You know, that you're given to one another, you become one flesh. That's interesting. You don't think the same. We talked about that, right? Box of spaghetti, a box of blocks. That's actually a good example, because some guys, sometimes guys, we do behave as a blockhead. It's it's a coming together and now pursuing together. You know? And and I we need to understand that while we talk about a husband being the head and a wife submitting to her husband, before God, we're not talking position of value. God loves us all equally. We're just we're talking about a distinction of role in these things. We're talking about role. God doesn't love the husband more than he loves the wife. Okay? And we have to understand that, you know, um as as we approach our responsibilities. So he says, a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they'll become one flesh. Now, I want to try and be as practical as possible here. So bear with me with that. I don't want a doctrinal message, I want a very practical one because we cannot become part of the 42. Okay? And if we don't become part of the 42, then to have a marriage that we just wish we never had. He that finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains the favor of the Lord. Right? Okay? There's a joy in that. That's a gift that God has given you, men. And ladies, that man is a gift that God has given you. And so I want to be very practical in this. And one of the things I was talking with Lori earlier, um, whenever we we discuss marriage, something curious happens. Okay? When you talk about the role of a husband, the wife's ears perk up. And vice versa, when you talk about the role of a of a wife, a men's men's ears perk up. Whose ears don't usually perk up? Those that aren't married. Because I'm not married. And some might say, I'm not gonna get married. Been there, done that, don't want to do it again. Okay? Or even those among us that may be married but have an unbelieving spouse. I want to talk to all of you. All of us. Okay? Because each and every one of us are married. Kids, husbands, wives, those that have unbelieving spouses. We are all the bride of Christ. We are all betrothed to the Lord. And a marriage begins with the betrothal. Okay? We're betrothed to the Lord. Each one of us are married to God in that sense. Right? So everybody right now, go ahead, get your ears, pull them up, and for the remainder of the message, keep your ears up like this. No one's doing it. Oh man, I was gonna get a picture. I was gonna take a picture. Come on. Let's have some fun. Um so it says he's gonna leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife. There's something that happens here, okay? You see, early on in biblical days, people married at a young age. Right? Mary, when she married Joseph, I I believe, and and help me out, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not great at this stuff, and I know some of you ladies are studying this. I think she I believe she was like 14, wasn't she?

unknown 43:37

Yeah, most likely.

SPEAKER_04 43:38

Wasn't she like 14 when she married Joseph? And Joseph was in his probably at least like mid 20s or something like that. Okay. So that that's that's a big age gap, right? And and and we see, you know, in our society today, however, people tend to last wait longer to get married. Okay, so so it's interesting. All right, because if you marry too early, you you you know there's there's there's immaturity. Now back then, immaturity probably, you know, people matured probably a little faster because they had to, they had to work a lot harder. They, you know, every day there were a lot of challenges that, you know, if if you were gonna have dinner back in the Bible days, ladies, you had to start about six o'clock in the morning. Right? Because the the the animal might need dressing, and I don't mean putting on a shirt and a tie. You might have to skin it and gut it and all that stuff and prepare it, and then cook it, and you'd have to go and grind the meal to make the bread, take the bread. You didn't have an oven, you had to take the bread somewhere in town, pay somebody to use a community oven to make your bread, and you'd have loaves, then, oh, you might need water, so you gotta walk about a mile and a half to the community well to pull the water and walk it back. It was an all-day event. Okay? It was an all-day event. Today we want to make dinner. Oh, darn, I didn't pull anything out. He knew where I was going. Twenty minutes later, you got a meal fit for a king. Right? It's it was it was different. And and guess what though? Uh when when life gets easier, we get less mature. We expect, we demand, we think it's owed to us. Consequently, and the longer we wait to get married, the more depth that is rooted, the more deeply that's rooted into us. And we have a lot of baggage that we can bring into that marriage. And a lot of things that have to be worked out. Right? So, so there's benefit and and there's there's there are pros and cons to both sides. Okay. So a man's gonna leave his his father and his mother and hold fast, cleave to his wife, become one flesh. Guys, I know you I know, and this might not apply to many in here, but I I I know. I know you love your mom. I know you love your mom as you should. You gotta love your wife more. Because you're not, you haven't cleaved to your mom. You cleave to your wife. Right? And you might have somebody that you went to school with since elementary school. That's your bestest bud. And you go to every Sabers game. Not anymore. Not anymore. Your best friend has to be your wife. Okay. Now, you gotta you gotta separate those old primary ties. And and in that, there's an inseparable bond between the couple, and where it's a lifelong, intimate relationship. Where you begin to know everything about each other. And and I love it. My wife and I are up on 30 years, and every, well, every day might be an you know an exaggeration, but very often there's just something new, you know, that you begin to realize or learn. Doesn't happen all that often, but every once in a while, you know, something comes up, and um, and and they're like, wow, I had no idea. I had no idea, whatever it is, you know. Maybe you know, 15 years into the marriage you realize that your husband really does like sports. Um that was an interesting thing. I chose to give up sports because of how you know what I saw it doing in me, the competitiveness, and and just really took a lot of attention and focus and all and ministering to people, and a lot of my conversations would be you know around sports at this. So I gave it up for years. I just stopped. And then one day I turned on a Baltimore Ravens game, and and I was commenting about you know, calls and rules and what was gonna happen, and Lori looked at me and said, Did you just read a book on the rules of football? And it wasn't just that, because then we're watching a hockey game, same thing, then we're watching a football game. Anyway. Um, and they become one flesh, and and it is a total oneness. Now, how does this apply to the married? Well, if we were to ask your spouse right now, right, would would they undisputably say that you, in relationship with other people, okay, it's gotta be other people, because the the first and foremost and in every one of our lives is our relationship with God, right? Jesus. Amen. Right? But now, if we were to ask your spouse, can they do are they confident beyond any doubt that they have that, how am I gonna am I gonna say this right? Correct me if I'm saying this wrong. If they have, if, if they have your heart, if your heart is safe, it their heart is safe in their hands. Okay, that's that that if we were to ask them, those of you that are married, what would their answer be there? Okay, those those that are single, now, without a show of hands, those that are single here, how many desire to be married one day? That's cheating! Um is the time to learn what commitment is. Now is the time to learn what holiness is, a separated life, and how to live according to the call of God and the truth of God's word in your life, right? Before you ask someone else to join you, let God prepare you. You with me on that? Okay. That's this this cleaving, remember, each one of us, we're betrothed to the Lord. Now in your singleness, let God prepare you for what's to come. For those that are unequally yoked. And everybody understands when I say unequally yoked, right? A non-believing spouse. When you don't have spiritual unity, look for what you do have a common bond in. Not to the compromise of your faith, but in order to let your spouse know that what is important to them is important to you, but don't compromise your faith. That's important. Okay? Because marriage, and some might be, well, you know, it's a non-believing spouse, right? You know, it's not the same in God's eyes. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. It very much is. It very much is. Because before the law was that union that God made between Adam and Eve. He made man and woman, man and wife, before the law. Before sin brought about the need for that sacrifice of Jesus, the Lamb slain, before the foundations of the world, and the law that gives us what we walk in. Okay? Marriage before God is very important. All right. So in the communication that we have, there's there are things, you know, as we talked about the distinctions, you know, understand how, you know, the the wife operates, and wives, understand how a husband operates. Um husbands, you know, in and and and being called that, you know, we're we're it's it's not uh a relationship, it's not a dominance in the relationship, it's a serving in a relationship. Husbands serve their wives just as the wives serve the husbands, okay? And um husbands must love their wives uh even as uh Christ loved the church, it says in Ephesians 5.25. And so there's a Christ-like devotion, there's a nourishment, you know, in in Ephesians 5.28, it says, in the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. There's a deep connection that's there. You know, because when he talks about loving your wives as you love yourself, right, there's there's that deep connection. Because which one of us here is really gonna hate themselves. Oh, you can say, oh, I hate my hair. I hate my side profile in the mirror. Because it's the it's you know, it's the before, after, before, after, you know. There's a deep connection when he says to love our wives, guys, as we love ourselves, a deep bond. Again, that cleaving. And um, and and spiritual equality. 1 Peter 3:7. Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered. Okay? What God has called you to is only going to be activated and furthered and perfected when you're pulling together. Okay. And and and in that, you know, as he says, to live with them according to knowledge. Well, um, you know before I get into that, you know, again, the application for married men, I want you to understand something here. Biblical headship, it's we measure our biblical headship by the size of our towel, not our throne. Okay? Now what am I referring to there? Christ, the creator of all the universe, the king of kings, the lord of lords, came in the form of the lowest of servants, took the towel, and washed the disciples' feet. Guys, your headship is measured by the size of your towel. Okay? That's gotta be real. It's not because you're the man and I said so. Okay? For the believing husband with an unbelieving wife? The most compelling argument for their need to be saved is not the Bible that you left open in the morning on the kitchen table with a verse highlighted that you hope they see and read, or the track that you strategically place somewhere in the house knowing that they're gonna find it, it's your life being an open book. It's you living according to the word of God and loving them and having in them the confidence that what is important to them matters to you, and that you are there to serve them. Not compromising your convictions to God's word, but you are there to serve them. Okay? And singles, the standard for a future relationship is set today by choosing friendships that model a mutual honor, a selflessness, and an emotional safety. Now, guys, I want you to understand, okay? There has been psychological, sociological studies, and and I'm not much given to that stuff, okay? And there is biblical precedence that women are different from men. Okay? And specifically emotionally, relationally, and and and in a desire for safety. Now, when we provide a safe place for women to be able to express emotionally what's going on in them, giving them the opportunity, you know, and and we we we nurture a security in them. And yes, that security might mean bringing home the bacon. Okay. And that is part of it. Paying the bills, making the money to pay the bills, making the money to bring in the food. In today's society, sometimes the women make more than the men, you know, okay. All right, but but there's still things that a guy has to do and to fulfill his call, you know, as a husband. There's there's there's a reality that women need security. Because in bringing that security, okay, by um making sure that that I gotta learn, I gotta learn this and I gotta be reminded a lot of this, okay? Uh, husbands, our wives don't need us to fix every problem. But they need us to listen. Okay? They don't need us to be bring the solution. They need us to hear what they're doing and bring validity to what they're dealing with. In the process, sure. Point them to Jesus. In the process, let them know what the word says. But don't discredit what they're dealing with. We have the ability to take that problem and the emotions associated with it, put it in a box, cap it, stick it back on the shelf. Guys, our wives can't. Okay? And we have to help them through that. How do we help them through that? By providing the safety that there's there's a safe place. They can bring their heart to us and we'll hear it. Okay? They need to feel safe and express themselves without overthinking how to present it. Okay? And when we do that, we are providing an environment for our wives to flourish and walk in what God has called them to. And a wife has been called to minister to you. A wife has been called to care for the children. A wife has been called to bring that stability and provide the part of you that's missing. And if you want that to take place, make sure that their heart is safe in your hands. The wife, okay? And and and we'll we'll hit this and and and uh and finish up. Wives, submit to your own husbands is to the Lord, Ephesians 5 and 22. And that's that's an honoring of leadership, okay? A willing submission, and I marvel. I marvel at how that works. It blows my mind that my wife has fully entrusted the care of her soul and life to me. That's humbling. And can any other man but me say amen? That is humbling. That somebody has that much confidence. Me, I know me. I know how jacked up I can get, and I know how stupid I can be. Lori, don't say a word. I I know the kind of meat head or blockhead or whatever else you want to say, I can be. You know, and and bull in a china shop. And I apologize for the times that you're coming trying to express something, and I just run like a bulldozer over top of it. What you gotta do is this. But they they they are to submit to their own husbands, and it's a willing submission. That's what blows my mind. And and elsewhere, it says in Colossians 3.18, as is fitting to the Lord. Submit to your husbands as is fitting to the Lord. Wow. And it's an intentional respect. They choose to. They are to want to do that. It's to be part of them and come out. And it says in Ephesians 5.33, let the wife see that she respects her husband. In Proverbs 14, 1, the wisest of women, this is a powerful verse. Ladies, if you listen, hear any verse I give today, listen to this one. Listen to this word. Proverbs 14 1. Write it down. Y'all got a formation sheet. Pull a pen out of the pocket, write down Proverbs 14.1. Ladies, single women, listen. The wisest of women builds her house, but folly with her own hands tears it down. We can just stop the verse there for ladies, or stop the message on ladies and your responsibility right there. That is huge when you understand how a man operates. We said a woman desires what? Security. Right? What does a man need? Can you say it louder? Respect. Respect. Respect. R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Okay. Now, the application, married women. Husband will grow into the man that you already know he is. What do you think your husband is? What are you praying your husband to be? What are you there helping him become? That's what he's gonna be. Okay? If you tear him down with your hands, what kind of husband's he gonna be? Words, actions, they mean a lot to a man. Now, ladies, you you might think we don't notice because we'll come into a house where you hung a picture up six months ago. And on the on on the the 31st day of that sixth month, we look and say, oh, I like that picture. When did where'd you get that? Or you buy a dress. Never had the dress before, and you come out with that dress and look, and and you come, look, it's a spinny.

unknown 1:04:30

It's on sale.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:33

We don't notice. Or a big one. You get all decked up with all the makeup and all that stuff, and your your husband comes out and you're like, so where are we going? Now, did you make the reservations? Showing off all your makeup. And we don't notice. And guys? Show of hands, have you been there? Okay. Oh, just just three of us? Okay. All right. Y'all are better than me. Okay. Those of you that are too sheepish or afraid because your wife is sitting next to you. When that happens and she calls you on it, just simply say, oh, honey, I'm sorry, I didn't notice, because you always look good. You always look good, honey. You don't need that stuff. Guys, take out your spiritual formation sheet. See me afterwards, and I'll restate that so you can write it down, commit it to memory. It's coming. We can have fun with it, right? Because we we know who we are. Right. We know our failings. We know our humanity. Right? We can have fun with it. We can come up with comical stories. Why is it funny when I say some of these things? Not because I'm a I'm I'm a good comedian. Somebody says, no, no, no, George, you really aren't. Not because I'm a I'm I'm not a good com I'm a good comedian. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, Mark. I appreciate it. It's not because I'm good at comedy. It's because we we all know that's exactly what we do. And it's more nervous laughter that I'm pulling out of you than a funny humorous laughter. That's who we are. That's what's in us. Right? Praise God. We have his word that shows us how we're supposed to be. And we look into this perfect law of liberty. And we're changed by it. Right? Yeah. And and so, you know, it it tells us the preacher told us in Ecclesiastes that our relationships have to be based with in a threefold chord, a braided cord. Right? You have the husband, you have the wife, and you have the Lord. And the husband and and and those that have braided? Okay. Have you ever braided anything or looked at it? Right? There's there's one that in essence, there's one cable, one cord that in essence kind of runs right down the middle, and the other two are entwined about it. Right? And and it's it's there is such a strength, intense, intensive strength in that where it can't be broken. You can take one line and under a certain amount of stress you can snap it. You can take two lines, and and progressively it gets harder and harder. And it's it's an exponential strength. It's not just three times stronger, it's exponentially stronger. Okay. And that's what it is when our relationships, whether single, married, or unequally young, when our relationships are rooted with Jesus and his word as the center, it will prosper. Wives, your husbands will grow and love you and care for you more than you could ever imagine. Husbands, your wives will respect you, underheard you, and pro and and and we need protection too. Guys, we need protection too. Right? Because we're out there and we face all kind of things. There's all kinds of things that roll by for us to see. You all know what I'm talking about, right now. We need protection too. We need that protection for your husband. How how well you can make the right track and leave it just in the right place.

SPEAKER_00 1:13:28

You give home, you reach God, and it's you know, it's your friend, so we pour out a praise, pour out a praise, it's your friend, so we pour up. You bring back to the car, you give the home, you restore every other break, it's your breath.

SPEAKER_07 1:18:22

Praise the Lord.

SPEAKER_06 1:18:26

Thankful to the Lord that when you look at marriage between a man and a wife, it's an example of Christ for the church, and when a society and a culture sees a godly marriage with a godly family, it turns them to God. Amen. And we thank you. Thank you, Lord, for your great, great love. Jesus said it as I have loved you, so love one another. Wives, love your love your husbands with the love of Jesus, amen. Husbands, love your wives with the love of Jesus. Kids, love your parents with the love of Jesus, amen. Parents, love your kids with the love of Jesus, and we'll see the glory of God manifested in our families and in this church. Praise the name of our God, amen. Amen. I'm gonna ask Rich Young if he'll close us off in a word of prayer. Have a great, great memorial day as we ponder the sacrifice that men and women have given over the years for our freedom. Amen. Some gave all, but all gave some, some gave all. And we we're thankful for it. So, Rich, close us out this morning.

SPEAKER_05 1:19:42

Heavenly Father, we're thankful that as we draw near to you, oh God, you draw near to us, you are faithful, God. We can turn to you in whatever we have going on, and you are there for us. Be in our marriages, our singleness, our widowhood, whatever the state is, oh God, you're able to minister to us and meet us at our point of need. And Lord, we pray for those who are in the dire straits right now, Lord, that you would come and see their position, Lord, and meet their needs today, oh God. Pour out your spirit upon us, Lord, and cause us to seek after you, I pray in Jesus' name. Amen.

SPEAKER_07 1:20:23

God bless you. In Jesus' name.