Ep 229. Flocking Together - Wisdom from Grackles

Mary Stone shares a breathtaking encounter with a flock of grackles while visiting the Karen Ann Quinlan Home for Hospice in Fredon, NJ. Their synchronized flight inspires a reflection on the quiet wisdom of nature and the beauty of unity in motion.

How the birds never collide opens a deeper exploration of how grackles — and all flocking birds — navigate together through separation, alignment, and cohesion. Their graceful movement offers a powerful metaphor for how we might live.

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Related Podcasts and Posts:
🌿 Flocking Together – Wisdom from Grackles (Blog Post) 

 🌳 Promises That Live Beyond Seasons – Blog Post 

 🎧 Episode 228 Promises That Live on Beyond Seasons

 Article on the University of Delaware website titled Blackbirds, Fly.

More about the Podcast and Column:

Welcome to Garden Dilemmas, Delights, and Discoveries.

It's not only about gardens; it's about nature's inspirations, about grasping the glories of the world around us, gathering what we learned from mother nature, and carrying these lessons into our garden of life. So, let's jump in in the spirit of learning from each other. We have lots to talk about.

Thanks for tuning in, Mary Stone
Garden Dilemmas? AskMaryStone.com
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Transcript

Ep-229. Flocking Together – Wisdom from Grackles

Sat, Nov 08, 2025 3:25PM • 10:41

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

Nursing home care, hospice, grackles, flocking behavior, separation, alignment, cohesion, nature lessons, compassion, caregivers, unity, harmony, garden dilemmas, blackbirds, migration.

SPEAKERS

Mary Stone

Mary Stone  00:00

Mary, Hello, fellow lovers of all things green. I'm Mary Stone, and welcome to garden dilemmas, delights and discoveries. It's not only about gardens, it's about nature's inspirations, about grasping the glories of the world around us, gathering what we learn from mother nature, and carrying these lessons into our garden of life. So, let's jump in, in the spirit of learning from each other, we have lots to talk about. 

Mary Stone  00:23

Hello, there is Mary stone on the screen porch, and it is windy today on this early November day. Thank you for joining me and thank you to those who reached back after our last episode Promises that live on beyond seasons. Several of you shared your experiences of loved ones in nursing homes, stories that echo so many others less than adequate care at exorbitant costs, but the greatest cost isn't financial. It's the toll on the hearts of the families and the souls of those who deserve tenderness. 

Mary Stone  01:00

I remember when my own mom was in a nursing home in Amelia, Virginia, we hired sitters to keep an eye on things and to actually feed my mom because they didn't do it. It wasn't until the local hospice came on the scene, which was much to the administration's dismay. They said they offered comfort care. And my reply, my mother hasn't been comfortable here for two years. I will never forget the surprise inspection that led to all those framed awards of excellence being quietly taken down from the lobby walls, or the goodbyes to the certain staff members. I hope someday you experience the care you provided the patients here, the blank stares and wet fish handshakes said it all. But there were angels, there too, caregivers who rose above what they witnessed, showing compassion even when the system didn't how they endured, I can't imagine.  To them, I offer my deepest gratitude. 

Mary Stone  01:59

So yes, this is close to my heart, and I hope the songs of hospice, the project Ken Roberts and I are creating, will help bring light to what is broken. If you've had stories good or difficult about loved ones in nursing homes, please share them with me at Ask Mary stone@gmail.com. Together, we can raise awareness of what needs to change, because there is always hope. And maybe, just maybe, if we look to nature, we can learn how to move through change gracefully together. So on to this week's story that starts like this.

Mary Stone  02:37

 Hello, fellow lovers of all things green, last week, I shared the sad news that the Karen and Quinlan home for hospice in freedom New Jersey will close on November 14, 2025 as you can imagine, my final visits as a volunteer come with a swirl of emotions, as it does for all of us that are part of the organization, the beautiful caregivers. 

Mary Stone  03:02

On Friday, while chatting with the angel caregivers, a large flock of grackles lifted from the farm field beyond the living room windows, a spectacular sight. Leave it to a retired United Airlines Captain, my singing partner, Ken Roberts, who wondered, how do they never collide? That's an intriguing question. 

Mary Stone  03:22

I haven't yet seen the swarms arrive on my property this season, but I adore the arresting sound of the 1000s of grackles descending into the yard, squawking and feeding for a few minutes before rising in a synchronized wave. Their take off sounds like the soft whirr of a helicopter, glorious in its volume and unity. It's a stunning reminder that there's power in numbers. 

Mary Stone  03:47

Common grackles move through our area this time of year, sometimes within many 1000s. Said my birder buddy, Dennis Briede, who's the Stewardship Manager of the Land Conservancy of New Jersey, they like to raid corn fields too. Feeding on fall remnants isn't so bad, but grackles are known for snagging newly planted corn and seedlings. Because of this, they're sadly deemed nuisance birds under state and federal law. Though culling is regulated, millions of grackles have been killed. 

Mary Stone  04:20

Common grackles are about the size of mourning doves with long tails, yellow eyes and black beaks. From afar, they appear solid black, but up close, they shimmer with iridescent purples, blues and greens. They sit like ornaments, filling the bare branches where leaves once were, when they're roosting in a tree. They nest in colonies of up to 200 and often migrate with other blackbirds. I have to mention, of course, that Blaine Rothhouser heard about the story and sent photos of grackles that are amazing, and they will be on the blog site. I will put a link in the show notes, stunning photographs, really you cannot miss them. 

Mary Stone  05:00

There's a fascinating article on the University of Delaware's website, blackbirds fly. It talks about a mixed super flock of millions of blackbirds, common grackles, red winged blackbirds, brown headed cowbirds and starlings. They choose churchman's Marsh Delaware as their winter home. Depending on the food source, they'll travel to Chester or Lancaster counties, Pennsylvania to feed, then return to the marsh to roost. The massive waves of birds recall Alfred Hitchcock's classic thriller The birds about millions of birds becoming violent killers of man and beast. 

Mary Stone  05:38

Common grackles are not considered vicious, although as social as they are, they defend their nests and attack other birds. I also read that they're inventive, foragers, snagging worms from robins, stealing eggs from nests and scoffing down smaller adult birds. But hey, they have to eat too. 

Mary Stone  05:58

Back to Ken's question, how do they never collide? It's fascinating how grackles and other flocking birds manage their flight. Scientists describe three key strategies, separation, alignment and cohesion, concepts that offer wisdom for humankind too. They maintain a safe distance, adjusting their speed and direction based on the six or seven birds closest to them, never losing awareness of their neighbors. When threatened, they instinctively shift slightly to the right and rise higher, all at once, moving as one, despite appearances, there isn't the leader. Each bird makes its own choices, yet together, they move as a single, cohesive unit. Their strength is in that unity. It's hard for predators to single out one among 1000s. Their collective awareness becomes their protection. 

Mary Stone  06:56

Occasionally, collisions do occur, especially during chaotic take-offs, but harm is minimal. Larger, less agile birds are more prone to run into each other, yet they quickly regroup and continue on. Another lesson for us. Watching their synchronized flight, I couldn't help but think of how often we do the opposite of what Mother Nature teaches us, instead of maintaining a respectful distance, aligning our actions with others and moving cohesively toward shared well-being, we scatter in competing directions. Grackles don't fly from ego or control. They respond instinctively to the needs of their flock to protect their young, their food and their future generations. Their movements are guided not by dominance, but by connection. Wouldn't it be something if we humans could do the same, fly in the same flock, respecting space, yet working in harmony to safeguard our families, our communities and our world.  Maybe the grackles are here to remind us that strength and grace come not from going it alone, but from trusting the rhythm of togetherness. The quiet awareness that while each bird moves on its own, the sky is shared by all. Garden Dilemmas, Ask Mary Stone.com.

Mary Stone  08:26

Yes, indeed, there are lessons from the sky. Watching those grackles make me think of the parallels with hospice. The caregivers, like the birds, work in quiet coordination, each tending their part, yet guided by something larger, compassion, trust and love. Maybe that's what harmony really is, awareness of one another, a respect for our shared space and the willingness to lift each other higher when the winds shift. If only we could live that way more often in our families, our neighborhoods, our world, we might find that unity isn't uniformity. It's the dance of individuality within a shared connection, isn't it? 

Mary Stone  09:10

And as the season of letting go continues, may we hold on to that image of a sky filled with wings shimmering together, reminding us that even in endings, there is beauty and the possibility of flying forward in grace. Thank you for joining me on the screen porch. If today's story resonated with you, I'd be so grateful if you'd share the garden dilemmas, delights and discoveries in the Garden of Life podcast with a friend or two, or leave a kind review or comment or five-star rating if you're so inclined, wherever you listen. Your support, for some magical reason, helps more listeners to find us as we continue to grow in this garden of life together. It means so much to me that you join me each week and we are growing together, and that just fills my heart.

Mary Stone  10:01

Until next time, have a beautiful day and remember, even in chaos, there's harmony waiting for us to find.

Mary Stone  10:09

 You can follow garden dilemmas on Facebook or online at Garden dilemmas.com and on Instagram at hashtag. Mary Elaine stone, garden dilemmas delights and discoveries as produced by Alex Bartling, thanks for coming by. I look forward to chatting again from my screen porch and always remember to embrace the unexpected in this garden of life. Have a great day.