From Vision to Ministry: Identity, Love, and Trust in God’s Timing

We trace a 1978 vision that becomes a living ministry in an unexpected way, then dig into identity, healing, and the daily choice to love. Along the way we challenge performance culture, talk grief honestly, and invite listeners to say yes to the process God is leading.

• waiting well and trusting God’s timing
• identity as image bearers and the new nature
• designing heart-searching discipleship curriculum
• what’s missing in church: love, maturity, formation
• healing trauma by bringing pain into the light
• choosing love, forgiveness, and trust each day
• discerning a healthy church by love and growth
• living as children of the Father, not just servants
• practical stories of surrender, grief, and provision
• resources: Gold Standard Ministries and The Invitation

Go to our website, which is goldstandardministries.com. We also have another website that’s pretty much the same. It’s called sendinghub.org. The book is called The Invitation. Discover the Treasure of You.

Chapters

• 0:00 Host Intro & Guest Set-Up
• 0:49 Janita’s 1978 Vision and Long Wait
• 2:08 Letting Go of Self-Will and Trusting Provision
• 4:48 Gift Ministry Miracle and Launch at 77
• 7:10 Resting in God’s Timing During the Wait
• 9:11 Tamara on Growing Up in Faith and Love as Choice
• 12:00 Building the Curriculum: Questions that Search the Heart
• 14:45 What’s Missing in Church: Identity and Maturity
• 17:50 Created from God’s DNA: Practical Identity
• 20:25 Living from the New Nature by Choice
• 22:40 Finding a Healthy Church: Love and Growth
• 25:10 Purpose and Covenant: Helping People Become
• 27:10 Healing Trauma: Don’t Stuff It, Deal With It
• 30:20 Grief, Trust, and Honest Relationship with the Father
• 33:00 Father Heart of God: Child vs. Servant Mindset
• 35:10 Helping Guarded Hearts, Especially Men, Feel Safe
• 37:40 Daily Choices: Love, Forgiveness, and the Pause
• 40:00 Conversational Prayer and the Holy Spirit’s Help
• 42:00 One Core Takeaway: Identity and Saying Yes
• 43:25 Resources: Gold Standard Ministries & The Invitation
• 44:30 Closing Reflections and Links

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

She's the voice behind the viral comedy, bold commentary, and truth-packed interviews that cut through the chaos. Author, brand creator, proud conservative Christian, this is Elsa Kurt. Welcome to the show that always brings bold faith, real truth, and no apologies.

SPEAKER_01: 0:18

Well, hello, my friends. Welcome to the show. We have another special interview for you today. I am so excited to introduce my two guests, Janita Madison and Tamara Woldridge. They are just wonderful, wonderful ladies doing a wonderful mission and beautiful work. And I'm so excited to have you both here. So thank you for joining me. We're glad to do it. Happy to be here. Okay, so you are. So let me start with Janita. So over, and you can correct me if I have anything wrong here. Okay. So over 40 years ago, you received a vision to create a discipleship training center where believers could discover who they are in God and understand who God truly is and to embrace their purpose in this time. And that vision, right, led the uh foundation for gold standard ministries. And you're devoted to restoring identity, teaching truth, uh, and helping people understand that they are more than what performance or circumstances define. And I love that so, so much. It's so critical. So, did I get anything wrong there? No. Okay, okay, okay, good, good. So um I'm gonna start. Let me start my first question for you, Janita, if you don't mind. Um your vision for discipleship trainings, the discipleship training center came in 1978. Correct me again if I'm wrong. Um, but it it took a few years, it took some time before you really saw it just fully manifested. So, what were some of the hardest lessons you had to learn um while you were waiting and while you were trying to grow this ministry about, you know, about your identity and trust and God's timing, all of those things. Tell me a little bit about that part of the journey for you.

SPEAKER_03: 2:08

Well, um, you know, often when people get visions like that, they think it's going to happen right away. And not very often. Um, God has to take us through a process of letting go of our own way, our own will. And that was a long process for me. Um, I was very good at uh pushing through things and figuring it out, and and um and that didn't work. Um I had to get to a place where if this was really gonna happen, uh, it was up to God. And he, you know, had to I had to trust that He would uh He would supply. I never lost that vision. It was very clear, very detailed, and um and it just never went away. And so I I did what I could. I I taught groups and and I'm a teacher of the word and um and always um always went with what was there to to be able to teach. And um and yet, you know, something like that takes millions of dollars. And um, and of course, my husband and I were always people oriented, and um he died of cancer in nine in uh 2007. And so at that point, that was my hardest place because I didn't see how any I could ever do such a thing. Um and yet um uh I it didn't go away. So um anyway, I went several years uh teaching and um I got involved with a ministry that um I loved because I'd been looking for something like that. I to disciple somebody you need to have the right model for yourself. And I found a ministry that modeled love and um and uh saw people through covenant instead of their condition. And that was what I was looking for. So I started uh going to their events and and um something I didn't know about that ministry was that it was a giving ministry. And um I they um I went for a six-week training session and stayed with a couple, they provided everything for me. It was in Oklahoma, and um and I stayed with them, and they uh it was a family that was involved with the ministry, and and they would always question me, okay, what's what's your dream, what's your vision? And so I shared with them and and um and um come to find out to well it was 2018, 2018, and um and they were there and asked me to stop by on my on our way home over to the airport to go home. And I said, okay, and and so I did, and um they said they that the Lord was saying to give me a very, very substantial gift of home. Um and uh when I found out that they did that, I found out the ministry did that too. And uh they would get people out of debt, they would buy homes, they would buy cars, they would, you know, just just a gift ministry. And um when it when I got it, I I knew immediately God was saying, okay, it's time. And uh absolutely overwhelming experience. And because I I wasn't a money person, I was a widow on social security and taking care of kids. And uh um, and so I uh the Lord led me uh back to Portland and um and I found a home that was perfect, uh five-bedroom home, three-bath. Um, and it's it's a place where people can come even for a week or two and stay and and just like I was treated to to just have them board and um and just stay here to be trained. I don't think it's not what I the vision, it's not that yet, but um I believe that God's intending to do that.

SPEAKER_01: 7:07

Absolutely. Can I be so rude as to ask you how old you were when that point hit, when when you kind of got what you were asking for, or you realized you were getting what you were asking for? What what point went?

SPEAKER_03: 7:21

That was when I was 7777.

SPEAKER_01: 7:26

Yeah, wow, yeah, incredible, absolutely incredible, and and it's so incredible to me too.

SPEAKER_03: 7:33

I mean, why did God wait so long? But he knows what he's doing, right?

SPEAKER_01: 7:38

That's the uh that's the whole uh you know, his timing is always perfect, right? And when you when you actually allow yourself to rest in that, I think that's probably there's so many hard things, um, which I did not know three years ago, how hard it is to uh be a believer. Um, and not so much that your your faith in him is tested so much. Well, I guess it is, but um in the process, it's the process we have a hard time trusting and the timing that we have have a hard time trusting. And and I and I think your experience is is so valuable to people who are in the waiting right now in their lives, right? Who are sitting in the waiting and saying I have people who reach out to me and they're like, you know, well, well, you know, if this, then when? You know, I've been doing this, I've been, you know, I've been good, I've you know, I've been devoted, I've been loyal, I've been all of these things. When is it going to be my time? Which and the obvious answer is I don't know. I'm not the one to know. I don't know when it's my time for anything. Um, but but resting, resting, allowing yourself, forcing yourself to rest in the waiting is wow, incredible. And and here's an example of what happens when you when you rest in the waiting, right? And and allow him to do his work. Oh my goodness, absolutely incredible. Uh, Tamara, I want to ask you so growing up under the influence of your mother's walk with faith and eventually ministry, how did you personally be uh come to understand who God says you are? And were there moments that you rejected or doubted that identity? Because my first thought always is had to be in the teenage years. That's when we get rebellious with everything. So I'm so interested in in your experience and growth in this.

SPEAKER_02: 9:40

Well, I was we've always been really close. Um, you know, growing up, we lived on the ranch with um, you know, out in the country and raised in a very um fundamental uh Christian background. Um when we became part of this ministry, I also became part of it because um it was something I'd been waiting for my whole life to see um people who actually practiced what they preached. And and it was all about love. And you know, being told that you can't have love without choice, you have to be able to choose love, and that's why we have free will, and that's why there's evil in the world, because people get to choose selfishness over love, and uh God doesn't want um puppets, he wants people that choose him, and um you can't do that, he's love you can't do that without choosing love, and um it you know, we've we've uh been working now on the on these books, the curriculum for since 2020, um, COVID. And it, you know, it gave us a pause and a chance to kind of, you know, what do we really want to do here? And and um I initially just started out, you know, doing the layout, putting it into book form, making it, you know, attractive, something that would be kind of fun to look at and and read through. And and then as we you know kind of went through that, um, and we would we would we had our wrestling matches with the way we wanted to say things or you know, um talk about stuff. And but you know, especially like in the questions and that kind of thing, I'm like, we have we can't just have a question that is yes or no. It has to be something that will actually make people think about what what's going on inside, you know, what is happening in my heart and my mind, you know, and asking the Holy Spirit to shine his light in our lives, you know, according to Psalm 90, verse 8, where it talks about God shining his light and he'll show us. And when we can see what's going on inside, then we can deal with it. It doesn't have to stay hidden or or have any power over us, the trauma and the the stuff that's happened to us in our lives. We can actually take it out, ask the Lord to shine his light and and heal it.

SPEAKER_01: 12:53

Yeah, I love that. Um, tell me a little bit about the as far as the curriculum. Who is who is it specifically geared toward? Like, is it geared toward um people who are in discipleship? Um, is it teaching you to disciple? Is it just teaching about cause of like explain the curriculum to me, like who it's geared toward, if you wouldn't mind?

SPEAKER_03: 13:18

Yes. Um originally uh my focus was on people, women especially, but men too, um uh like 35 and older. It that's been churched all their life, or just churched. Um and because I was in church from the time I was born. And um, and my husband and I moved quite a bit, and we would attend, we've attended Baptist, evangelical, non-denominational, presbyterian, church of Christ, all of those churches, and um uh Foursquare. Um in all of those experiences, and we also had a ministry of our own, um, caring for delinquent boys from Seattle for 17 years. Um, and then other ministries, in all of those experiences, I realized something's missing. I'm I studied the Bible all my life since I was a Christian, and um and I read things in the word and I'm not seeing it. And so what's missing? And and um it began to become come to me as far and starting to write the curriculum. Um I I knew some of the things that were missing once I got it uh became a part of that ministry that I went to. Um and it was key, the key things. Why is the church so immature? Why why do we still judge each other? Why do we still, you know, not love? And um and you know, what why aren't we growing up and uh becoming real sons and daughters who can do the father's business? Um and it was in me just like everybody else. And um, so by the uh when we started writing the curriculum, and it started to really come together what what was missing for me. And not not I in all of those years, I was I just never got it uh or somehow missed it. Um but I think that the church didn't have the revelation either. Um people don't know who they are, right? God tells God says we are, yeah. Um uh so that's what's in the curriculum. What what that's what I want people to know.

SPEAKER_01: 16:14

People who have not gotten what they were looking for in church, and um you see that so often too, people leaving church, leaving the church because they're not getting fulfilled, you know. And of course, we know that people leave the church because they simply don't like the message, right? You know, they don't they want reasons. That's right, you know, they there's certainly a a large element of of that, especially in in today's time where they just want to be told that they're great and they're perfect just the way that they are, and all of those things. And, you know, as a as a Christian, you know that it couldn't be further from the truth that we are not good, only he is good, and we're saved by his grace. And, you know, so and people don't there is a fraction of society that does not want to hear that because they've been taught by the world and not by the word. And, you know, so that is obviously where we're at, and that's a difficult battle. And and I think you hit on so many important things and you you hit it right, right off the bat with the the the love, the love factor. Yes and that, right? And that is truly our hardest. It's really easy to love lovable people, right? Or people that you deem lovable. It's really hard to love people that you don't find lovable, right? Um, so I mean, I'm still learning it. I'm this is this is a daily struggle, and it will be a struggle my entire life to look at the people that um, you know, that I feel so terrible saying it, but that fill me with hate for them, um, to turn that around and and put the right perspective. So it really sounds like your your curriculum and your approach and your vision all um really have a heart focus on that, which is just so needed in this world right now, more than ever. I mean, it's always been needed. Um, so that kind of leads us into so um kind of like the DNA of creation. You both emphasize that believers were created from God's DNA as his image bearers. Um, what does that mean in practical terms for someone today, especially someone who's been told that they are less than or feels unworthy?

SPEAKER_03: 18:34

You know, I I uh I've become aware that in just about everyone's heart is the question, who am I and why am I here? Especially with non-believers. Um, you know, they there's something inside of us that knows we're created for something greater, and yet we can't find the answer. And that um that I believe is what happened in the Garden of Eden. When Adam made that choice, uh, he lost that sense of who he was, and he knew it before he made that choice, but um we received his nature when we were born, and um, and so we have all of that selfishness, that self-preservation, that self-interest, everything is about me. And um and that's just the way it is with the world. And so what happened on the cross was that old nature died, and P, you know, there's always a question there because then why do I still sin? And um, but the the word says we were crucified with him, and when we were crucified, that old nature went into the grave with him, so it doesn't belong to us anymore, and that's what was missing. One of the things that was missing for me, uh, and because of the question, you know, well, I'm still doing what I don't want to do, right? And um anyway, uh, I think the re the the reason we have that question is we're not being taught that uh it really did die. That isn't a part of me anymore. Um and when I said yes to the Lord, I was conceived by the DNA of the Lord, his image, and I have his nature now inside of me, and I can um I can live out of that nature, I can make choices, I don't have to sin. And um, and so what we need to learn is that with a new nature that never sins, um we have choices. And uh and we need to learn that we we can choose every single day to live out of his nature. And um he he wanted image bearers, he wanted ones who uh were just like him, and that's his purpose for us to become just like Jesus and bear his image, true, truly bear his image, um because we're made from his DNA. And that's that's God's intention is to return us back to innocence, to um, to doing right, to being just like him, to becoming one with him. All of the scriptures point to that, that we are returning back to who he made us to be. And um, and so that's that's the main thing I want to impart to others is that you're on a journey to to back to who you were and are. And um and and then how do we do that?

SPEAKER_01: 22:36

What a what an amazing foundation for growth to start there. Like what a perfect starting point. Because you're right, that is that is our biggest question and our biggest struggle. You hit right on it. Um, you know, uh so many people are so lost in our world right now. And it's because, as you said, they don't know who they are. That's right. And and they don't know whose they are. And that having being grounded there is probably the most, not probably it is, the most life-changing moment of my personal life. And I would imagine any believer's life that that is the moment when you actually realize whose you are. And now my my identity is set. So now there is nothing in this world, in this temporal world, that can it bounces off me, it can't affect me, it can't hurt me. Anything that you say to me or tell me that I am, you know, so the world will try and tell you that you're this and you're that, or you're not this and you're not that. And, you know, we have that assurance that if we trust it and we believe it, you get to sit back and say, Yeah, no, you don't define me. He defines me, right? I mean, that is so, oh, it's such a profound knowledge. And and I get so mad that I didn't know it earlier.

SPEAKER_03: 24:05

I know you can go through years of of struggle and because we haven't been taught. Yeah, and I have a passion um for people for for church people especially to grasp this, to understand it, to um to grow up because he needs us to grow up. We need to be available in this world today to uh be led by his holy spirit to do what um we're called to do. Right. And to love. Yeah. Unconditionally, yeah, unselfishly. We love. That's the one thing he taught me early uh years ago, is that um I don't know how I knew this, but you know, we were working with a gal that was um out of a very abusive home. And um, and she would do things and and um say things and I'd say, that's not who you are. And I I just knew that um um we're called to be uh great and um and not look at condition in people, but see them for who they really are. And that's that's what we don't do in church. And um because we don't know, you know, we don't people don't know who who they are, right? And we can't call people up into that unless we know who we are. And um and be convinced of that, just like you were saying, nothing, nobody can convince me I'm not who I am. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 25:57

And and and that uh that that knowledge, that deep knowledge, that understanding, I think truly does shape how you're able to treat and and be around others, right? Like it just once you have that finding, it's so much when you're in a good place in a a good healthy place, whether it's physical health, emotional health, spiritual health, um, but especially spiritual health, because all of those other things, if you, if you have spiritual health, because you you you know you have eternity that this body is just a body, and you have that assurance, it it changes how you can interact with people around you, and especially uh the people that you know that I mentioned that you may deem uh difficult to love, unlovable in in your own, in your own eyes, which is not that you're viewing it correctly, of course, um, but it does give you that pause. I know it's teaching me that pause. Again, I had a long way to go, but that is teaching me to pause. And instead of um, I think one of the most powerful things I heard was maybe instead of cursing the person that cut you off in traffic, maybe instead of cursing them, maybe pray for them, like turn it into prayer instead of a curse. Because we're, you know, we're so quick to, you know, lay on the horn and say some angry things. And I, you know, I hope you have the day that you deserve, you know, and that and maybe say some, you know, especially nice, not nice things. Um so, you know, just making yourself pause and and think those things and um talk to me a little bit about you, kind of touched on a little bit of like kind of I guess church culture, I guess would be. So, how does somebody I would imagine for you it's very a very quick thing? You've been in so many different churches, uh different denominations and everything. Um are you very quickly able to determine if it's an unhealthy church? Oh yes, yeah, yeah, it's it's apparent quickly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What are some things um a new believer, uh, a new churchgoer should be looking for essentially? Love.

SPEAKER_03: 28:16

Um is is the leader are the leaders um able to love, able to discern. Um we're a part of a church right now that um is like that. And um uh I I would I would you know look for is this helping me grow? Is this is this contributing to um to my growing up, maturing? And um a lot of times it's all about performance. You do this right, you should do this, you should not do that, all of those things, you know, those are things Holy Spirit tells us anyway. But um uh a lot of the the situations are all about how can you serve the church. And um and we do need to serve the church, but we we need to be brought, we need to be encouraged to be who we are, called to be. You know, everyone has a different destiny, and we need to be a we need to allow people to find their destiny in God and and pursue it. And um I think a lot of times that doesn't happen.

SPEAKER_01: 29:39

Yeah, yeah, I think you're right. I I I hear all the time, I was very blessed too. We found our church on the first try, and I did not know that that was a big deal until so many people afterwards said, Wow, you this was your first church, and you knew this was the one. And and it's so funny that you said that because I, you know, I'm internally I I was probably like nodding my head so hard when you were saying that. Um, because it was such an immediate feeling of love and embrace and welcome uh to our church that I just I knew in my heart that like this is this is the one. And and you know, my husband is is more pragmatic and and more reserved. You know, I'm exuberant. I'm like, I love this place, that's everything to me. And my husband is more reserved, you know. So he was the the balance we talked before we came on air. We were talking about balance, right? Um, so he was the balance that he's like, well, let's, you know, let's give it a little time, let's wait and see, let's get the vibe, all that kind of stuff. And, you know, all I technically knew going in is that I wanted a Bible teaching church, you know, like that was the major thought in my head. Um, that, you know, I just want to learn the Bible. I want to learn the truth and I want it taught right. And uh, you know, so we're super blessed with with all of that. So I I think your message, your your um message there is is so important for people. So go in. It should be a loving church. Obviously, a Bible teaching church church is um, you know, great, but that's that is a such a perfect starting point to go from because as we said before, people get put off of church um for exactly what we're talking about, not not feeling the love, so to speak, right? And and obviously that's gonna put people off. Um, I want to talk about your your purpose and calling. We have been basically talking about it, but I want you to like kind of crystallize this for me. Um so Tamara, I'll start with you. What do you think that your purpose uh in this season is and how has it evolved as gold standard ministry has grown?

SPEAKER_02: 31:49

My per my purpose, and and I actually call it my my covenant, the the God, the covenant that I that God gave me that I have with God, um, is to see people become who He intended them to be. He um to facilitate that, to help people know who they are. And um, you know, that that whatever they've had to endure thir through their lives, there's an answer. There is uh a way for them to get all of the junk out of the way and uh find out who God says they are. And that has you know, it's it's been an evolution, um just as we've been processing through these books and you know it's it really crystallized in just you know, the the the things that I hear Holy Spirit speaking to me and pointing out in myself, um, you know, look at this, you know. Um a recent example is I I um asked my heart, okay, what do you need the most? And I heard trust. I need trust and realized at that point that my trust level with with myself, with God, with other people was not where it should be. And so now the last few weeks, months has been processing through that. How do I learn to trust more? How do I choose that? Because really trust is a choice. And um, so that's been kind of, you know, it's just it's always an ongoing journey, you know. Wherever you're at, there's always another layer to take off of beliefs and lies that you've believed and and you know, traumas that have happened, uh, just processing through all of that.

SPEAKER_01: 34:03

Sure. Yeah, absolutely. Let's talk about that a little bit more. The healing from trauma. Um, for so many people, past traumas, disappointments, or hurts all become barriers to embracing their identity and their purpose. Um, for each of you, whichever one wants to answer first, um, how have you navigated your own pain and and what kind of healing um has been critical for you to walk in in freedom?

SPEAKER_03: 34:30

Well, I have um I have learned that we're either going to stuff it or work through it. And um, and it's uh usually stuffing it. Um, and then it comes out later in our lives, affects what we choose, affects um our behavior, affects those kind of things when we stuff things, um, we make choices based on why we stuffed it. And um, and so dealing with grief and trauma uh is so so crucial. And lots of people have gone through horrible, horrible stuff. Yeah, and um and it needs to be healed, and so it's choosing to uh to acknowledge it, first of all. It's it's there, and I I know it's there, and and then being willing, because it's hard um to pull up pain and let God heal it. And um and yet I've seen people, uh the one gal that we worked with um for uh 30 years, um, she became a part of our family, and and she persevered through horrible stuff, and she is now working with other people that have gone through the same things. And um, and so I've seen people heal from that kind of trauma. Um and but it's a choice, it's always a choice to just let it be stuffed or or get it dealt with.

SPEAKER_01: 36:17

Yeah, absolutely. My husband, um, when we joined our church and um we decided that we wanted to be baptized, and um we had our conversation with one of our pastors, and be as we were driving in, my husband, who neither one of us have any faith background, um, we were just, you know, you know, I mean, I was uh Catholic, but we weren't practicing by any means, you know, never went to church except for holidays and special occasions and you know, things like that. Um, and he was the same. And so when we were driving in, he said, Well, are they gonna, is it gonna make me confess? Is it gonna, because it's a baptist, we go to a Baptist church. Uh, is it gonna make me confess because, you know, I don't want to hash up all of those things. I don't want to talk about, you know, stuff from the past and the war and all of those things. Like, I don't want to do that, you know, that's I'm not comfortable with that. I'm like, honey, no, it's a it's gonna be a conversation between you and God. It's you don't have to talk to you can, and it's good to, but you do it on your own terms. But this is a relationship with God. They're they're helping you understand that and you talk about what you want to talk about, you know. So there's a huge misconception, I think, that people from like a Catholic bathroom background, and I'm I'm not knocking any other denominations, not nothing, just you know, um, but they they don't understand that it's different in in other, you know, that that's not quite what we do. Um, you know, so and then I think those are important things to to realize that this is this is about a relationship with God. And if you turn to Him and if you run to Him, um, that is that will change your life for the better. And it does, I think it does make you able to start to talk about that because you understand, you start to understand, like you were saying, the the purpose of your pain might be to share it with others to help them heal, you know. So there's a purpose to it, right? You find the same things, Tamara, or or is your experience any different or um no, it's it's pretty much the same, I think, for everybody. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02: 38:31

You know, the the number one thing is to know that God wants a personal, intimate relationship with you. And um, you know, it it's been a it's been a difficult summer for me this this summer. I lost my husband in June. Uh, he'd been ill for a while and and I lost him. And so it's it's been a summer of processing through grief and coming to that place of just letting it be what it was. And you know, if so I I pretty much cry at the drop. My I leak. I leak all over the place. I get it, I get it.

SPEAKER_01: 39:16

I do. I'm so sorry for your loss. And and it it is it's so difficult um to suffer that kind of loss. And and you know, the joy of knowing where he is now and who he's with now, it is a comfort, but it doesn't change your earthly loss, right? Yeah, I still miss it. And I and I think that's um, you know, I think that's powerful because you have you have that understanding that you can share with somebody else who's grieving, who's experiences, who maybe isn't as spiritually and emotionally evolved in that thought process as you are, and you can help them get there. So what a what a gift to um to know the things that you know is is really so beautiful.

SPEAKER_02: 40:07

I know that he's good, he's always good. He's always good. No matter what we're going through, he's good.

SPEAKER_01: 40:12

Yeah, yeah, he is the comfort, right? Um, something that you both do that I I understand is that you refer to God as a good father, as the father. And that is something that has from the beginning always touched my heart immediately, that reference to God as the father. Um, what are some of the ways that the father heart has expressed itself in your life, especially in moments where you maybe didn't feel love or accepted? How did that change that for you? And it's even better if you can't think of a moment that you felt like that, right? I mean, what a what a gift.

SPEAKER_03: 40:55

Well, and I I would say that um he's always been father to me. And as far as back as I can remember, um and um and I've had the awareness of his presence um as a father to a daughter. And um so I I can't think of a situation where I didn't feel that. Um I'm so glad that you can't.

SPEAKER_01: 41:28

I love that. What a what a you know, just what a gift that that is. Is you feel the same, Tamara?

SPEAKER_02: 41:36

Well, yeah, and you know, it's kind of recognizing because you know, a lot of times when we become believers, we start out as being just kind of a servant of God. You know, it's kind of like um we're out there doing our part. And then it it for some it kind of evolves into uh becoming a friend of God. And then it will become when you choose, you can choose to be a child of God. And a child of God is someone who comes to the table when they're called. They they live in the house. Um, they're not just a friend or a servant, they're they're actually part of the family. And uh just coming to that place of I am a child here, you know, it's not just always my will, my way. It's it's you know, what does the father want? What what is he asking of me? And basically what I hear the father asking is I have all these kids out here who need me, but they don't know how to get to me. And will you go and be show me to them? And that's that's being a child of of the father is being the one that that will go out and rescue the ones that are that need to be rescued, that are crying out for love.

SPEAKER_01: 43:18

And the father's love. Yeah, I think um tell me if you've found this in your experience that the the the ones I my guess is more often men may have a more difficult time giving over, right? Um, for women and girls, I think it's easier because it's you know, we're softer and it's easier for us to just kind of fall into that embrace, um, accept it, right? And men, I think, have a more difficult time because they're so used to being the men, being the man, being in control and not showing vulnerability and not needing uh a father. And then particularly you add ones um who don't have good or have any relationship with their their father, their biological father. Um you know, so how how would you how would you speak to someone who whose heart is so guarded against accepting all that um the father can give to you? Because like you, like you said, it is there's so many layers. There is the father, there's the friend, um, you know, all of these things. How what language would you give to someone to help them open their heart to that? Especially men.

SPEAKER_03: 44:43

Um I would affirm them and let them know um who they are as much as possible. Because, well, one of the things I wanted to add, um, you know, why men or women fight so hard against being vulnerable? Against um, and I experienced that years ago. Um I was always the good child in my family. Um we had aunts and uncles that would come and live with us and everything, and my sister was the opposite, and so I was the good one, she was the difficult one, and um, and that was my identity, and um and so it stayed with me for years until a friend of mine said, You are so self-righteous, and I thought, oh dear, okay, um, how do I deal with that? And I couldn't deal with it because that was my identity, right? And if I let go of it, who am I? And that's what people go through, they don't know their identity. Uh, if they know who they are, then um uh those things can't get to them, and um and so I want people to know um I would with men, I would um like we have one right now, and um and just continue to um affirm in love and let them know that's not how I see them. I see them different, you know, in God, and and just continue with that until they feel safe.

SPEAKER_01: 46:44

Yeah, I like what you both have said. I like everything you both have said, by the way. Um, but I especially like a point that you've both made throughout, right from the very beginning, about love being a choice. You know, all of these things are a choice. Forgiveness is a choice, uh love is a choice. Uh there was another one there, and I'm drawing a blank and I don't want to keep dwelling on it, but it'll come to me. Um, but I I think it's so important to point that out that these are choices. You can choose to do this, and it really is it's that simple of a concept. And I and I know in practice it's maybe not so easy, but if you make the choice every single day, you know, in every circumstance, you know, you you pause, it's that pause, right? Where you say, hang on, I have a choice here. I I can act out in uh I can choose anger, I can choose rage, or I can choose love and compassion. And I I think when people get that in their head, really just engrave it in their brain that this is a choice. Everything I'm doing right now is a choice, and I can choose a path of peace and love and goodness, or I can choose that other dark path and you know which one will serve better. And um, and and I I love that you convey that message, and I and it sounds like that's a huge part of your curriculum, right?

SPEAKER_03: 48:13

Yes, and I do want to say that um as long as we keep stuff stuffed, um, it's a hindrance to our relationship with the Lord, it stands in the way, and that's why it's so important. He is intent on our healing and our freedom and will take us there if we will say yes. And um, and only when we say yes, um then he will deal with it and and remove it from our hearts.

SPEAKER_01: 48:47

So I think people, myself included, I alright, let's face it, I'm asking this question for myself. Um when I in my conversations with God, or as I'm learning to have conversations with God, I get tripped up. And I and I know I'm not alone in this because I sometimes I feel like, am I speaking to him the right way? Am I, you know, should I be saying uh Heavenly Father, this, that, and the other thing? And I tend to be a very conversational person. So if I'm driving in the car, I'm like, hey God, listen. So I was thinking, how about if, and then I'm like, is that inappropriate? Is that wrong? No, like tell me if you would like, is there a right? Is there a wrong?

SPEAKER_03: 49:37

There is no right or wrong. He he accepts us right where we're at and how we are. I mean, it's all okay with him, he can deal with it. I love that. And he doesn't hold us against us, he doesn't do any of that, he just loves us and walks us through whatever we need to know. And um, and it's just like you know, a parent dealing with their children. Um that's how he is with us. And and if we're still a toddler in our uh in some areas of our life, that's where we're at. And he works with that. And I feel like I'm a perpetual toddler. No, no, you're really not, just maybe in an area or two, whatever. Um, it's just that's the way it is with all of us. Yeah, we still have uh areas that are waiting to grow.

SPEAKER_01: 50:31

That's so comforting, and you know, and I I think it's so important for all of us um to remember that we're not gonna be perfect in this walk. It's we're literally incapable of it, and that's why we need him because he is the perfect one. Um, and I and I have to remind myself of that all the time, you know, when I get angry about something and and you know just lash out instead of taking that pause. I get so mad at myself, like, come on now, you know better. And it's like, yeah, he knows, he knows that you're gonna keep failing and and need to keep picking up. But it's the it's the caring, right? It's about wanting to to do better because you know who you belong to.

SPEAKER_03: 51:13

So and knowing that the Holy Spirit is the one who helps you with it. He he's the one that shows you things, yeah. Not you can't fix it. I'll just tell you that right now. We can't fix it ourselves. He has to show us and and he will show us the way.

SPEAKER_01: 51:30

Yes. I have taken to saying, you know, every time I'm going into pretty much any situation now, um, but especially difficult ones where if I know that there's gonna that I have to have, you know, a confrontation or a difficult conversation or whatever the case is, um, I I always ask the Holy Spirit to speak through me, to speak for me and through me, because whatever I'm gonna say is not gonna be good. Not gonna be helpful. So, and and ladies, it's actually working. Like that's where it blows my mind. I I I'm so bad and I'm embarrassed to admit this. I'm a terrible apologizer. I don't do it well. I I give back it's it's a very, very bad personal trait that I have that I have a difficult time apologizing. And I had to apologize to somebody recently. And before this happened, I was struggling so hard with it because I didn't want to do it, quite frankly. And I that was what I said over and over again, to be honest with you. And um the words that came out of my mouth were not mine, they were not me. They were very mature, they were very appropriate, they were genuine. Like I don't want to, I don't want to make it sound like it wasn't genuine. I I genuinely felt the words that came out of my mouth. They're just not the words that I would have spoken. And I drove, drove home, called my husband, and I'm like, honey, you're not gonna believe what just happened. You're not gonna believe what I just did. And then I had to correct and say, Well, all right, it wasn't me, it was the Holy Spirit working through me for me. And uh so yes, uh, oh my goodness. I'm sorry, I had to share that little personal antidote. Um, so tell me, if if someone remembers just one thing from today, one truth that you hope will settle deep in their heart, um, what would that be? And how do you hope their life will look different because of it?

SPEAKER_03: 53:27

Find out what your identity is and what God says about you. He says awesome things, and it's all in the book. Um, you will discover who you are. Uh and it's essential. It just has to, it has to happen for each of us.

SPEAKER_01: 53:48

Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. I love that. How about you, Tamar? Tamara, sorry.

SPEAKER_02: 53:53

I would just say say yes. Yeah. Say say yes to the process. Absolutely. And um, just keep saying yes. You know, just Lord, what do you want to do? I say yes to whatever it is you want to do. Just beautiful, absolutely perfect.

SPEAKER_01: 54:14

Tell everyone where they can find your curriculum, um, where they can learn more about gold standard ministries and and more about what you're doing.

SPEAKER_02: 54:24

Go to our website, um, which is goldstandardministries.com. We also have another website that's pretty much the same. It's called sendinghub.org.

SPEAKER_01: 54:37

Okay.

SPEAKER_02: 54:38

And uh yeah, and the book is available on the book is called The Invitation. Beautiful. Uh Discover the Treasure of You. Beautiful.

SPEAKER_01: 54:46

And that is on the website. Is that also on Amazon? Can they find that any any other locations or everything through the website? I believe it's on Amazon as well. Perfect. Okay, excellent. Outstanding. Ladies, I can't thank you enough for coming on the show and indulging me in my uh little stories and questions and all of that. Thank you. Thank you. Yes, it was so nice meeting both of you. Um, and and for the viewing and listening audience, it is Gold Standard Ministries. And um, the book is the invitation. And uh, we will have the link for their website in the show notes. So you'll be able to find that there. And I hope that you do. As you all can see for yourselves, this has been um just just such a pure conversation of faith and love and and good intention and all of those things. So thank you all for watching, and we will see you in the next episode. Take care, guys.