Chap68: Lenny [horror]

Fresh off our first big con (as 8Sparks), we discuss the ups and downs of the Maine Comic & Toy Con, shoutout some new friends, and Clarence vents over issues with IngramSparks and Amazon's KDP.

At around 33:01  we jump into a brand new fully improvised horror tale, based on an idea Clarence has been carrying around for a few months now. The story follows a prostitute named Chloe who finds herself fighting for her life against a ghoulish creature called Lenny.

Transcript

This episode is brought to you by nerdcore. A store in the Auburn Mall located in Auburn, Maine. The place for all your nerdy needs. You can find Clarence and I's books there, as well as a plethora of other local writers, artists, 3D printed D&D tiles, taxidermy, you name it. They even have board games and tarot card readings, in addition to regularly hosting local creators. And as if that weren't enough, I like to dig through their used vinyl collection, which are organized into multiple genres. I usually go for classical or jazz and are all reasonably priced and tested beforehand. So yeah, check out the nerdcore store today at the Auburn, Maine Mall. And now for our feature presentation. 3.4s It was a podcast 1.3s from my. It is the coolest podcast in. 3.7s He called it the. 5.6s

U1

It was a podcast. 3s Some might say. 2.8s Time. 1.7s Spark. 1.8s All right. We are. 1.5s Clapping. Welcome back to the writer's block. I'm here with Clarence Carter. 

U2

Mhm. 1.1s We haven't introduced ourselves 

U1

in like time ever. Yes. 

U2

In like 67 episodes. 

U1

Yeah. And we might actually have new listeners. So. 

U2

Yeah. So it seems like an ideal time. Um, so I'm Sean Jay Nigro and uh, my co-host here is Clarence Carter, and we're both authors, and we've been doing this for. 1.2s Almost 70. This is our 67th episode, technically not our 67th story, because we have some stories that we never released. Um, but if you're new to the podcast, we talk about writing, we talk about, um, narrating. And we're a part of eight Sparx Media, which is a multimedia company with storytelling at the heart of it. So inevitably we're going to get into we have a video game with two video games, which we started unveiling at events. Um, we've got trading cards. So I was over here telling Clarence not to touch the desk because the camera shakes. But here I am touching the desk. Uh, yeah. And, uh, we just coming off of, uh, my first con, uh, the main comic and toy con at the Cross Insurance Arena in Portland, Maine. Uh, Clarence is the second big event, but we've been doing, uh, these little events since last year. Yeah. Um, and, yeah, that was a it was a fun time. A little bit of a drag at the beginning, because we were kind of up in the nosebleeds and didn't really expect that. I should have expected it, because they did give us a layout of where we would be. Mhm. Um, but I wasn't really familiar with. It's not really new anymore, but because the last time I went there, I feel like it was the Civic Center. But anyway, we made the most of it. They had us tucked in the corner with, uh uh and let me get my cards ready. Yeah. 

U1

So I don't forget names. Magenta fantasies. Yeah. So we were set up next to a table that she was doing her own RPG video game, and she had laptops set up, and she would invite people over to play. Uh, and she's also a writer and artist. So she, she put all of that into this one game, which I thought was really cool because that's sort of what we've been doing. Um, which inspired me to pull out the little Jimi games, which are not nearly as impressive as what she had. But, um, we had a couple people come over and play them, win some books. So it was a good time. And then, um, to our right, we had, uh, winter gaming where they had basically some Mario Kart and two driving simulators. They had some flight simulators set up too. So that was pretty interesting. Um, not the not the setup that we were expecting because we have more books than anything else at this point. But again, we made the most of it. So yeah. 1s And that's a wrap. Um, yeah. We were there for all three days Friday, Saturday and Sunday. And as you said, it did start off kind of slow. Um. We didn't get this. The sales that we wanted in the in the beginning, but we did a lot of networking. We also went out with some of the other vendors. What was it, Saturday night? Yeah, I think it was Saturday night. Yeah. 

U2

We, uh, went to like, this, uh. 1s Also, I don't remember what the word I'm looking for. 

U1

It was a cosplay contest. Slash karaoke. Mhm. Um, the hosts were dressed up like Doc and Marty from back to the future, which was pretty funny. Yeah. Um, and your wife went up and did karaoke for the first time, right? Yeah. I missed it because I had to. I had to head home, but 

U2

yeah, yeah, she got up and she sang a maroon five song. Uh, who else did? We met all kinds of people, so I'll apologize if I forget any names during this episode, but, um, I'm trying to think of everyone. We mentioned winter gaming. We mentioned mentioned to fantasies. Um, I don't even know if I have all the bookmarks. I should, of course. We bumped into Christine Anchorage and I met her. I really I had met her last year, but I met her like, I actually talked to her this time. I met her husband, Corbin. And they're going to be bringing us to. We're going up to caribou for a coffee shop event, which we've been talking about. So she will be on an episode of The Writer's Block coming up. Uh, we talked, I met Joshua, Marcella. And is it Marcella? Yeah, Marcella 

U1

and I bought one of his books. Actually, I think I bought two, two of his books. Mhm. 1.3s Um, I met, uh, Joseph Mulkey and his writing partner, who, uh, apologies. I can't remember the name at the moment. 1.5s

U2

Um, I don't either. 

U1

Yeah, I'm trying to remember. Uh oh. Xander. Xander won both. He played the both, uh, little Jimmy video games. Uh, and he's going to be helping us set up a book, signing up a new Barnes and Noble opening up in South Portland, which we will give updates on. And just so. Oh, uh, there were two other writers that are also going to be on the podcast, but I don't know if they had a. 2.1s

U2

Oh, we've collected a whole bunch of stuff. Uh 1.4s

U1

oh. I do have their books over here. 2s Oh, and I have. I was going to show you this, uh, because we've been talking to a local animal, um, a non-profit animal organization, Mister Drew, in Lewiston, Maine, and he's been bringing in children's book authors. So Clarence and I are going to be doing some book readings and selling some books there pretty soon, which I'm pretty excited about. 1.1s

U2

I'm not. 1.4s I'm just kidding. 2s

U1

Very convincing. 

U2

Well, I don't I'm not looking forward to reading it in front of a group of people. Um. 

U1

Here we go. Shout out to Morgan Campbell and Val Campbell. Mhm. Um, yeah. I got some of their books as well. I'm looking at your camera and I keep like. I'm not really sure. 

U2

Yeah. 2.9s

U1

Anyway, I'm sorry if we left anyone out. Uh, but we intend to bring all of you on the podcast at some point, because it's going to be season seven is going to be quite busy. We're even bringing back Keith Talbot, who is our regular artist. Mhm. Um, so yeah, um, all kinds of, uh, cool cosplay there at the, at the event. Uh, a few, a handful of celebrities. Um, all kinds of interesting vendors. Uh, it was thankfully we didn't have to stay overnight over in Portland. Uh, but we're going to have to in Bangor. Um. 1.3s

U2

But it's kind of draining for me. I don't know, I don't I don't get the, the jazz, the whatever from interactions that some people do the, the boost, the it's quite tiring to, to people all day for three days in a row. 

U1

Yeah. It's weird how like on the last day, you and Mo were talking about how you were tired and I wasn't quite there yet. And then all of a sudden it all just hit me. And I think I've talked about this before, but it's weird how to me how you can be so tired without doing anything physical. It's just a mental social exhaustion that you're depleting. Um, but I had a blast. I don't know, because I've gotten into the rhythm of it. Uh, so at first I was. I might have been a little bit nervous, not knowing how things were going to go. I tell you what, that square terminal. Really, uh, I think it sped things up a little bit. It made it. It made it easier for me to focus on the pitch, um, which by now is for me is sort of a it's on repeat. 1.1s Uh, you just kind of have to tweak it a little bit depending on who you're talking to. And I found that it helped seeing people dressed up in cosplay, like if people were dressed up in Star Wars cosplay, I maybe assume that they were into sci fi and try to lure them in with that. Uh, a couple people walked by with Friday the 13th shirts, and I tried to pitch the fact that you had done, uh, screenplay for a fanfic film. A fan film. Yeah. Uh, it didn't go over well for either of them. One guy, I just. I don't even know why he was wearing the shirt. He seemed like. Oh, he forgot. He had forgotten that he put the shirt on. And then I think the other guy just ignored me. 1.6s So if you're listening to the podcast and you ignored me, fuck you. 

U2

Yeah. It didn't. It didn't work either time. It was hilarious. 1.5s I know I shouldn't laugh at that, but it was kind of funny in the moment. 

U1

And then obviously when when people have young kids, I try to tell the parents, hey, we got some kids books over here. Um, although you did not have your pie eating book there, which I keep giving you shit for. Yeah, it didn't even come in until, what was it, Monday? Yeah. It didn't come in until after the con was over. It was what it was. But 

U2

I should have ordered some. Yeah, I should have ordered it earlier, but I don't know. 

U1

Uh, speaking of books that may or may not have arrived. You want to tell everyone what happened with Mishka? Oh, 

U2

God. Yeah, sure. We'll talk about Mishka, so 1.2s

U1

I did. I, I thought it would be a great idea to do the launch around the con. So here in Maine, we don't have a lot of big events, like. Yeah, like, um, Portland and Bangor are like the two big events. So I thought it would be a good idea to have Mishka launch the same weekend as the con. I thought that was a good move. And, yeah, that's so too. 

U2

If Ingram, Spark and Amazon had not colluded to fuck me over. I'm just kidding. They're they didn't conspire. It was incidental I'm sure I don't know I don't know. So you were trying Ingram for the first time. Oh so it was either an Ingram problem or Amazon realizing that you weren't using all of their services to push their books out. I don't know. That's the conspiracy. Now to me, that's the conspiracy. 

U1

That's the, uh, tinfoil hats and malarkey. Yeah. This and me. So what ended up happening was the the cover for the book was fine. It looked perfectly fine. The cover for the paperback, it didn't show the front cover. It only showed the back cover. And that's not where everything went wrong. Because if you ordered the paperback, it would still come in normal, like we. I bought ten of them for the event and sold like eight of them. Anyway, that was not the problem. The problem was that it went out of stock immediately. I think I only ended up selling a couple online before Amazon said that there weren't anymore, and which when it comes to like print on demand, how is there? Not anymore. That makes literally no sense. Yeah. 1.5s

U2

So I was pretty livid when I don't remember if it was Saturday or Sunday. Saturday, maybe somebody told me, oh yeah, hey, your book is out of stock online. And I was like, what? And sure enough, and it had been out of stock basically ever since then. It's now been, I don't know, like four days or five days and it's still not back up and running yet. And I hope to have it up and running next week, I think. 

U1

Yeah. So did you have any were you able to see if you had any pre-orders? Um, 

U2

I had some, some sales. Yeah, not necessarily pre-orders but some sales. 

U1

So apologies to anyone who hasn't received their book yet but so they are in the works. So something running around over there. 

U2

One of the, one of the things that happened was when when I addressed the issue with Ingram, they wouldn't let me make any changes until all the all the orders were processed. And then when it was processed, they like lock it. You can't touch it for X amount of time like 72 hours or something. And then I had to do this multiple times, which is why 1.1s it's taken so long. 1.5s

U1

Wow. That sucks. Yeah. So are you going to use Ingram again. You're going to give him a second chance because what's the benefit of using Ingram as opposed to just CDP. 

U2

Wider distribution. 

U1

Okay. Yeah because I saw that a couple of your books weirdly No Honor is on there as well. On the Barnes and Noble website, I could have sworn that koala celebrates Songkran was on Barnes and Noble for a brief time, but I don't currently have any books there. 

U2

Um, so the the benefit to doing Ingram versus KDP is is wider distribution. So they try to push a little bit harder into like libraries and book, you know and and like bookstores versus KDP is trying to get the sales to stay right. They have no vested interest in you. You putting your books anywhere else because they don't make any money. 

U1

That's why I suspect that it has something to do with Amazon. 1.1s

U2

Maybe, if nothing 

U1

else, the slow response. 1.7s Uh, it could be, I don't know. I don't think I'm even on their radar at all. So I don't imagine that's the issue. And here was the the worst part of it was like it being out of stock immediately. And I knew it wasn't because it was a raging success. And I was like, uh, I wish that's why like, that would have been a whole different ballpark if it. I wouldn't have even been upset if it had gone out of stock. And they're like, oh, yeah, you sold 20,000 copies in the first two days. I would have been like, fucking, who cares? 1.1s Go out of stock for the rest of the month. I don't give a shit, 1.1s but I'm just kidding. I do give a shit. But still. And it's 

U2

that whole thing has been stressful and we're getting around to fixing it and we're hopefully going to be back up and running soon. It's actually in process again right now. And this time when it when it approves, it should stick. 

U1

So, uh, besides getting Meshuggah officially out, what are you currently working on? What's the next big release and possibly when if you know. Mhm mhm 

U2

mhm. I've been working on a short story for a charity anthology that we got invited to for the first time I've ever been invited to an anthology. 

U1

We got invited. 

U2

Yes. So anybody who. 

U1

Uh, 

U2

what's the word I'm looking for? Um, anybody who tried to get a table at this Bangor event last year got an invite to do this charity anthology that's like Maine folklore. Maine legend, Maine myth. Whatever. 

U1

Oh, I mean, I wasn't there. Oh, the little events as well. 

U2

No, we we tried to get a table there, but it was already booked. 1.2s Oh, and they took our email addresses and they sent us this invitation to this charity anthology. 1.2s

U1

Oh, speaking of events, we are going to be officially at the Bangor Comic-Con. We are paid for. We're going to have a table. Um, we'll be selling books, we'll be doing trading cards. And I think little Jimmy was a success. 

U2

And it's not until what, October? 

U1

Yeah. Uh, 

U2

eight. 

U1

Are there actual dates 

U2

yet? I don't know, I think it's the same weekend every year. We'll keep you 

U1

updated. Um, and so far, I think Michael Rooker. Is that how you pronounce his last name? Rooker. He's one of the celebrities that are going to be there. I didn't meet any of the celebrities this weekend. No. Um, I know that Alan Covert was there. He walked by our table, but I missed him. Um, 

U2

Alan Covert from grandma's boy. He's, uh, one of Adam Sandler's guys. Uh, yeah, he was there, and I got to meet him, and he did walk by our table, but he really didn't say much. You just said hi when I saw him that 

U1

time, I wanted to yell. God damn you, Kevin Spacey. You take all my parts because I know him from Little Nicky. I've seen grandma's boy, but. And I know he wrote it and acted in it. Um, but I was a big Nick Schwartzman fan, and so I think I watched that movie just for him. Sorry, Alan, 1.3s but you kept saying you you wanted to get him over to talk about making a movie out of, like, damn Ernie or something. Yeah, that'd be funny. Damn. Ernie 

U2

would be a great film. 

U1

Um, I don't see it. I don't see the the matching of, uh, what he's done. Compared to what? How that book. Felt to me. Mhm. Um, but who knows. Could be 

U2

funny. Stranger things have happened. Um, I met C.J. Graham. That's not the interesting part. C.J. Graham. He played Jason Voorhees in one of the the Jason films. Monique made me go over to his booth, and I wanted to run. I didn't want to. And it's nothing against him. He's great. I just didn't I'm not a very social person in general. As we very well know. So she made me go over and talk to him, and she made me tell him about Jason in Indianapolis. 1.1s So here I am like, yeah, I kind of wrote this movie or played a part in it or something, or played a part in writing it or something, and 

U1

he. Oh, and you got an IMDb credit 

U2

now? Yes. He was a lot more enthusiastic than I anticipated. 1.1s Okay. Interesting. Um. 1.1s And 1.3s then. And I tried to downplay it because that's what I do with everything. I don't want the attention. I don't like the attention. Um, and then that's not the interesting part. The interesting part was after we got home, after the the con was over, it was like, not Monday, maybe Tuesday or Wednesday. Uh, the guy, Sam Smucker, who does the film, put up a post saying that C.J. Graham had joined the team. Really? Yep. 1.6s

U1

Huh? That's pretty cool. 

U2

Yeah. So apparently Sam Smucker reached out to him and he said yes. So he's going to be somehow involved. That I don't know. I noticed that I didn't get my IMDb credit. Yeah. 

U1

Okay. Sorry. I had I had one suggestion. Yeah, but it never really made it in. 

U2

All of those interesting things happened. Um, we did make it out of the red, thankfully. 

U1

Uh, no we didn't. What 

U2

are you talking about? Did we? 

U1

Yeah. If you factor in the cost of ordering the books. Mhm. Um. The cost of gas. Mhm. The cost of the food. What we ate while we were there. Because technically you're not allowed to bring food in although nobody got us for that. Yeah. Um, and, but well we did end up discovering that there were more, more options. But at least the first day, it was just like one thing that sold out. I like lunch by, uh, not lunchtime. Like halfway through. Yeah. Uh, it was like a pulled pork. 

U2

Oh, okay. Maybe we didn't get out of the red, but. We did. 

U1

It was a success. And the cost of I, you know, I bought books and comics from fellow creators because I wanted I wanted to support them. And I figure eventually we're going to get to know these people enough that, um, they're not I'm not going to feel compelled to buy something just because I'm standing there talking to them, you know what I mean? Like, I want to, um, and I want them to buy my stuff as well, but I don't as someone who's a vendor there, I don't have all the money in the world to be spending. I probably shouldn't have spent as much as I did. But yeah, I'm sure it'll be worth it. I'm looking forward to reading this stuff. I 

U2

tried not to spend a lot of money there because I'm trying to get out of the red. Yeah, but I understand, like it's hard not to buy some stuff, especially if you like the people and I have in the past, I've bought things from other vendors. Um, I even got a cool alien pin that Monique got me 1.4s

U1

and it 1.4s

U2

says greetings from aliens on it. Nice. Oh, yeah. What current projects am I working on? Oh, I'm still tapping away at LiDAR a little bit. And that short story, it's called the well currently, but I need to come up with a better title and the deadline is fucking coming. Creeping right up on me. I got, I think, five days left. Yeah, I don't have any main I have stories that take place in main like Tic, which also has a well in it, but it's not the same folklore that you're riffing off of. Uh, so I don't know if I have anything for that. I haven't really written anything besides lyrics in a while, and I actually haven't written lyrics in a while, because I've been so focused on getting the video set up for this, um, and then rereleasing eight spark stories. So I'm hoping now that this, this convention is over, we do still have other events coming up. I think there's going to be one on May 18th in Farmington. Um, but, um, now that the big event is out of the way and this season is pretty much wrapped. I'm going to start doing more creating, which is why I got into this. 1.1s Yeah, and I got a gimbal, too. I was playing with my gimbal all weekend. 1.3s Um, because we're I've been trying to get clearance to do more like we're doing video right now, but like, actual not even necessarily skits, but short short films. Um, either original or adaptations of eight spark stories or even the writer's block. Uh, because people like film, and it's something that I have always wanted to do anyway, because I got into this writing screenplays. So. Yeah, it's going to be interesting seeing it's only been four months, which is crazy to me. We're almost five. Um. 2.3s

U1

Yeah. But it's it's going to be really interesting seeing how things pan out for the rest of the year, because we've gotten so much done already. Mhm. 

U2

I think it's interesting now that now that I think about it in this way, you started out. 1.4s Writing screenplays and then moved to prose and moved to kids books. I started writing kids books, moved to prose, and now I almost exclusively write fucking screenplays. I 

U1

don't think that I knew that you started out writing kids books. 

U2

I wrote a couple of them very early on. Are they redeemable? I don't even think I have them. So when I first started taking this seriously, I was 21 maybe, and I thought I was going to write kids books. So I wrote, I think I wrote two of them, and then I quickly moved out of out of kids books and started moving into prose. 1.4s

U1

Mm 

U2

mm. I had also written prose as a kid, too. Oh, 

U1

uh, so the dream missed one of our stories. You said that that was an idea you had for a story. But was that one that ever came about? No, no. Maybe it's. Well, you don't really want to get into kids books still, but that could be a I could see that as a young adult novel. I yeah, I have a love hate relationship with kids books. They're fantastic. And the people who want to do them should do them. But that's not really my forte. That's not really my legacy. And I think I figured that out pretty quick. I wrote, like I said, a couple of them and they never came to fruition. And. The desire. I wrote that one, and even that was like I wrote it. And then I didn't think I was ever going to do anything with it. And then somebody in this room convinced me, 1.9s

U2

convinced me to push it out, and I did. And I don't know that there's another one. I've had a couple of ideas, but like I said, it's not really my. 1.3s Not really my cup of tea and I don't really want to be known for that. Not that it's a bad thing, just I like my more serious work 

U1

better. I just want to be known as a storyteller and musician. But I'm a storyteller in my music as well. So storytelling is the story says it all. Yeah. 

U2

Also, kids books are so damn expensive. Yeah, as our comic books. Yeah, comic 

U1

books are more expensive. Um, speaking of which. So Keith is he's he's doing the first two pages basically of the comic, and I think we're going to release that on the Patreon, which if you're new to the podcast, um, you don't even have to pay. You can subscribe to keep up with Clarence and his stuff as well as anything involved with eight Sparks Media. So eight Spark stories, the writers block, the trading cards, um, and the film stuff that we might be doing. Mhm. Etc.. So yeah. Um, so Keith is just about working on the two comic, the first two pages. Um, he's trying to nail a look. Um, so that he can then apply that to the rest of the story, which he's already outlined. Um, so I'm really excited to see that come about. And then I've started talking to, uh, Peter Parker. Uh, Bruce, I actually don't remember his last name, but he's my other illustrator friend, uh, who did the cover for the seed and the seed to which is coming. Mhm. Uh, I started talking to him about what he's going to need for me to do an adaptation of another story for comic, because I do want to get into comic more comic writing. Um, 

U2

I think we would fit in better if we did a couple of comics, but 

U1

I do, I do too, um, especially like at this past, this past weekend, I think we would have sold some, 

U2

um, so we don't have 

U1

that hurt. And I think that, uh. 1.3s With the kids books. Uh, one of my ideas was, uh, the owl and the alien character. Um, and now the more I think about it, I'm thinking kids might enjoy that more as a comic book. 

U2

Mhm. So we don't have an artist lined up for Wendigo. 

U1

It's going to be Bruce or Keith. The thing is Keith is I, we overwork him. But we're extremely grateful for all that you do. Keith. 

U2

Yeah. You're amazing. Um, because I might have a guy. 

U1

Because. Keith, I feel like he's like the third spoke. He's. He's you. Me and Keith 

U2

are the OGs. Are the OGs? Yeah. I mean, without Keith's artwork. Yeah, I know that. We've started occasionally here, and they're using Midjourney, which. Sorry, 

U1

we're never not going to admit it, though, so it's not like we're pretending, right? 

U2

Um, and we're not trying to take Keith away from. I mean, take work away from Keith. He's just overwhelmed. 

U1

Yeah, and also, he's working on his own comic book, which I'm excited to read. Yes. Um, I am too Lovecraftian. I won't give anything away because he'll probably talk about it when he comes back on. Yeah, 

U2

I've. I've seen a little bit of 

U1

it. I have to. Yeah. Yeah. Well yeah, he's been posting it. I think he posted on the CT Art and photography page CT Dash and photography. 

U2

Um, amazing work, amazing work, Keith. 

U1

And I think he's, he commented on, uh, the portal party video and he said, I'm from Northumberland, guys. And now that I'm saying it, I'm hoping that I'm getting the name right. 

U2

Yeah, because 

U1

I keep forgetting where he's from. Yeah. Where he's from doesn't exist. No, 

U2

he's just made that up. He's from Lovecraft Country. He's from the deep, dark depths of hell. Um, speaking of hell hellscape, um, I've got another another piece coming out on hellscape soon. Um, so imposter has not come out yet. I have a meeting with Nels this weekend where we're going to go over the casting. He and I are going to go over all the, uh, submissions on Saturday. We're going to pick the winners. We're going to announce them. We're going to get to recording. I don't know when impostor is going to come out, but I just did the casting sheet. 1.1s For without me yesterday. The day before yesterday. Um, so we're going to start working on that too. Cool. So for those of you who don't know, I wrote a short story called Without You that's on eight Spark Stories. Um, it's about one of my favorites. It's about this woman named Aram who descends into madness on this train. That's it. There's a twist. Clarance is not good about a story that 

U1

can't. Revealing his twists. Yeah. Anyway. 1.4s I wrote a sequel to that. There's no way to not. I wrote a sequel to it. Not one of my favorites. Yeah, but it will be interesting to see how this turns out as an audio drama. It could be that for me, it works better in that medium, especially with the voice actors that you have available to you through hellscape. There 

U2

are some talented ducks 

U1

in there is. Um, so you haven't done auditions for that one yet, but it's a did you say, you know, the cast for imposter? 

U2

No, we're doing the casting this weekend, so we 

U1

don't know if Connor has made it yet. We do not know. I'm rooting for you, Connor. 

U2

He. He said while he was on here that he did submit, so. 

U1

Cool cool cool 

U2

cool cool cool cool cool cool. Yeah. We get to pick him this Saturday, which I've never done that before either. So. 1.1s Um. It's going to be interesting. 

U1

Some some real quick updates while we're talking. I just went to my first concert of the year. I saw KT Tunstall, finally one of my favorite musicians, and she was playing with Shawn Colvin, who was also great. They did, uh, it was an acoustic setting at the Johnson Opera Hall in Gardiner, Maine, um, which I guess was the third show in like the last month or so. Um, since they renovated the building before that, they hadn't done anything since the 50s. So it's a really nice venue. Um, I think they were talking about. 1.1s That they might have even had, uh, the girl that's on American Idol right now. What's her name? 

U2

Oh, she's in the news and on our news feed all the time, but I can't remember her name. She's really good. Oh, yeah. I have no doubt that she's talented. I don't really follow American Idol or most pop culture. To 

U1

be honest, Julia Gagnon. Um, so. 

U2

Oh, well, yeah, her and I went to high school together. No, I'm just 

U1

kidding. Uh, representing Maine. Yeah, yeah. 

U2

Oh, for people who are listening out of the state, it's just you, me and a moose. That's pretty much the population of Maine 1.8s and my cats. Yeah. 1.1s

U1

Anyway, um. 2.7s Should we jump into a story? 

U2

Yep. Okay. Yep. Beep. Beep. Beep. 1.7s

U1

All right. You got any ideas? 

U2

Yes. 1.9s

U1

Okay, take it away. 1.8s Did you know that by day I'm a plumber? That's right. And we at the writer's block are proud to announce that one of our sponsors is Mark Negro Services, based out of Westbrook, Maine, and servicing most of southern Maine. Mark Niagara services is available for all your plumbing, heating, gas, and even sprinkler needs. It could just be my employee bias, but I can confirm that the work done by these guys is clean, efficient, and affordable and all done within a reasonable time period. You will never have a leak or go cold with Mark Niagara services, and if you're already experiencing one or both of those two things, you won't have to worry much longer. Reach out to Mark Niagara Services at M Nigro Services at gmail.com. That's the letter m n I g r o services at gmail.com. Links are also available in the show. Notes. The writer's block is brought to you by our card place. That's the letter R, located in the Auburn, Maine Mall. Our card is the premier Auburn location for comic books and trading cards, including Pokemon Magic, Yu-Gi-Oh! Sports, and even music. I got my own little collection growing of pop star and yo MTV raps cards featuring legends like Ozzy Osbourne, Jimi Hendrix, LL cool J and my personal favorite heavy D in The Boys. Our cards also have some fun collectibles, like a toy replica of the gum gum fruit from the One Piece anime, and they're fully certified for card valuation, so you can find out just how much those old baseball cards you found in your attic are worth. So what are you waiting for? Get on down to our card place at the Auburn Main Mall today. 2s

U2

On a dark street in Los Angeles, a woman stood on a corner. Her legs were exposed. She had a patient yet seductive smile covering her face as she watched each car slow down and look at her as they came. 1s She. Put on a great face. And as she stood there staring at all these potential johns as they came by, she said to herself, you know, of all the hands that have ever touched me? I don't think any of them have done so with love. 1.9s

U1

And as another car pulled to a stop, she walked up to the driver's side window in it. Word down. Hey there, sugar man said. Hey, how you doing? 1.5s And they stared at each other for a second. She looking for all the obvious signs, the things that she'd learned to look for over time. The first thing she looked was to his wedding finger. Quite often, men picked up hookers when they were married, and she noticed that there was, in fact, a ring on his finger. Then 1.2s

U2

she looked at the back seat, making sure there was nobody there. 1.6s You want a party? She asked. He nodded. Yes. She walked over, eyeballing the inside of his car. She didn't see any obvious weapons. She sat down, 1.9s close the door behind her. 6.3s

U1

Where? Where are we going? What's, uh. What's the plan? He put the car in gear. Uh, we're just going up the street. She pointed out a nice little spot and then out in an alley that she knew. 1.8s

U2

And 1.3s

U1

as. As they pulled into this dark alley. She asked him, hey, we can do this. We can do this for free. All that I ask is that you let me sleep in your car tonight. What? He asked, are you out of your mind? And he had slid his wedding ring off and stuffed it into his pocket. Uh, I can't do that. No, no. Absolutely not. And she pleaded. Well, she almost begged him. Listen, there's a storm coming. I don't want to get wet. I don't want to be out on the streets tonight. I need a place. Come on. I'll do this thing for you for free. Just let me stay in your car tonight. I'll be gone in the morning before she's even awake, I promise. No. Absolutely not. I'm not letting you know where I live. Are you out of your mind? Get out of here, he said. And go on, kid. And just like that, she was kicked out back into the street. He backed out, backed the car out of the alley and disappeared. Frustrated and annoyed, 1.1s

U2

she started walking and she could hear the thunder rumbling overhead. 1.8s

U1

I don't know what 

U2

I'm going to do. Things were so much easier than things used to be in my life. Never I just. Ah, 

U1

fuck. If only Bruce were still alive. If any. If only Bruce had not passed. Things would be okay. And as she's thinking about Bruce, she's thinking about Bruce and him working at the mortuary. And his brother. His brother who was still alive. His brother who looked a lot like him. Not twins, but very similar. They had very similar facial. His name was Lenny. Oh, Lenny. Lenny. Write. Lenny. Lenny, she thought. And as she's walking towards the mortuary where they had worked. 1.5s

U2

Speckles of rain start to fall. Oh, I gotta get out of this rain I gotta hurry. So she starts walking faster. And she looks over her shoulder and she sees a figure walking in the midst behind her, getting closer. Oh no no no no no no no, she says, and she starts moving faster and faster. And then she tucks into the mortuary, which the door was unlocked, and she slams the door shut and hits the lock. And then she stands there for a second, wiping the beads of water off of her face and out of her hair, and she's looking around the sanctuary. Safety! Then a voice from the other side of the room. 1.2s Hey, Chloe, I thought it was you who'd been sneaking in here. She looked across the room and saw Lenny standing there, and for a second she considered turning and unlocking the door and running. But she didn't. She stepped in. Lenny. 2.2s

U1

Is it your phone? 1.3s

U2

It's never happened before. 5s

U1

Oh. 4.7s

U2

That's quite dramatic. 7.2s

U1

Are you carrying a pager? 

U2

No. I have the same exact things I always have in my pocket. My phone, my keys, my wallet, and a thing of headphones. 1.4s

U1

Oh, it must have something to do with this laptop. 

U2

Yeah, I think it does. 

U1

Are. 2.2s We're just going to have to talk around it, I 

U2

guess. I think when you do the noise cancellation, it'll get rid of most of it. 

U1

I hope so, I hope so, 

U2

I think so, I hope so too. So I know so at least at least it should. 2.1s

U1

And then Lenny pushes the tray into the deep freezer, closes it, and he walks up to her and he gives her a big hug and he says, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry about Bruce. I'm so sorry about everything. 1.5s If if it is you. And I'm pretty sure it is you that's been breaking into here at night. 1.2s I. I understand, but you can't keep doing it. Yes. You feel closer. Yes, you feel safe. Whatever. But it's not a good idea for you to be in here, especially by yourself at night. 1.6s Oh, I'm so sorry, Lenny. I didn't know where else to go. Just one more night. That's all I ask. Just one more night, and I promise I'll never do it again. Lenny shuffles around at his desk and he finds, uh, some snack cakes, ho hos, funny bones, Ring dings, whatever hostess. And he gives them to her. This. This should suffice for now. 1.1s But. You need to be gone. 1.2s

U2

Before the sun comes up, because that's when my boss will get here. 8.1s

U1

It's. What 

U2

is her name? Chloe. 

U1

It seemed clear to Chloe that Lenny wanted her gone for other reasons as well. 1.3s He was. 1.7s Busy sweeping up a corner of the mortuary, and it looked like he was trying to hide his face. And he was his. He had a cough. Um, one of those coughs that never goes away. He's always trying to clear his voice. Um. 2.1s One of those coughs, do you think? Well, why don't you just drink more water, please? Drink more water. But she knew he couldn't help it. But his cough seemed to be getting even worse than it normally was, and he seemed like hunched over, in pain. Hey. Hey, Lenny. Are you okay? I said you should leave. She looked up at a clock on the wall. It was getting close to midnight. It was like 1158. Two more minutes. She looked back and Lenny had disappeared into another part of the mortuary around the corner. Hey, Lenny, are you sure you're okay? I said leave. His voice was beginning to sound weird. 1.6s So she gathered what things she had, which was not a lot, and she started to back towards the door. But she heard thunder. She was not looking forward to getting out there in the rain. Are you sure I can't leave? She saw his shadow from. From where? He was out of sight, and his shadow seemed to be changing into something that was not Lenny. She fumbled for the door, and she started to open it when she heard a scraping sound. When she turned around, she saw the shadow was still there, but at least what was supposed to be Lenny was leaning out of around the corner, and you could see his hand, and his fingers were all. They were not the way they should be. They were like contorted and grabbing onto the wall, and she could see the marks that had been left behind. He had scraped the wall, and his nails seemed longer and his skin seemed paler. 1.4s And then. From the shadow. 2.2s

U2

Of where his face should be. She could see his eyes. They were a little bit more illuminated than human eyes should be. And when he blinked, it was sideways, like men in black. 1.4s Oh my God, Lenny! She backed out the door and she stumbled over a a step that were like three little steps to the mortuary. And she saw him moving about inside. She got up, brushing some dirt off of her and she started to run. Just book it through the graveyard. Um. 1s But she found that she had hurt her knee in the fall, so she was kind of like not running as fast as she as she could have run. And it was very painful and she couldn't help but yelp in pain. Ah, and surely he would know in which direction she was going, no matter which direction she tried to go. She finally made it through the cemetery and out onto the street, which was pretty much empty. Um, except for a cop car across the street. Um, the rain was picking up. It was just pouring. She approached the car and she realized how she looked. She was still wearing the clothes that she wore, the way that she wore them to entice potential johns. So she walked up to the car and started pounding on the window, and immediately regretted it because the cop rolled down the window and he had like a mustache and he looked like a douche. And he looked up at her and she could immediately tell she just had this. Not like a six, not like a paranormal sense or anything, but she just had a feeling about people when she knew that they were not good people. And he was looking up at her and his eyes seemed lustful and he. 1.4s Trace. He looked up and down her body, remaining too long. Below her neck and she started to back away. 1.4s Excuse me, ma'am, can you put your hands up against the vehicle? He started to get out all nonchalantly, like this was an everyday thing for him. 1.6s No, officer, you don't understand. Excuse me, ma'am, are you talking back to me? He put his hand on his holster. Uh. There's somebody. And then he slapped her. 

U1

She fell against the car. Facing the cemetery, the cop started to rustle around in his pocket for something and she could see behind him. Lenny or whatever. Lenny had become pacing, not like moving fast, almost like in a JSON sort of way. Just taking his sweet old time 

U2

stalking. Stalking. Thank you. Approaching in the rain. With the light from one of the streetlights. Illuminating in a in a noir kind of way. And then he disappeared behind the cop. She looked up at the cop, and the cop was doing something with his belt. And she gulped. And then Lenny's weird new dilapidated hand burst through the cop's chest, and his hand was like, coming out of his ribcage, and he started to those claws, grabbed the rib cage and started pulling in like the cops. The hole that was now in his body had become a black hole, and things were being his organs and everything were being pulled through it backwards. She saw guts and everything spill out on the street. Wash away down a nearby storm drain with the heavy rain. And then the cop fell, revealing Lenny in all his monstrosity, the new Lenny ticket. 1.4s That's what you get for bringing your own idea. 1.6s

U1

Turn it on its head! 2.6s

U2

Chloe screamed, blood curdling scream. 1.4s And the cops body fell limp under the ground and a squelch. 4s

U1

She starts panting and raises up and tries to run, but Lenny stands in her way. Or what used to be Lenny and his mongoloid body sort of blocks her path and she says, Lenny, don't do this. I know you're a good man at heart. I know you're a good man, just like your brother. You don't have to be a monster. And that fierce voice comes back. I'm not my brother. 

U2

I'm nothing like him. 1.2s I know, I know you're a good man, Lenny. She pleads. She tries, and then from the corner of her eye, she catches movement. She turns and she looks and she sees this 1.1s old lady, this old lady who's on a walker. She's moving closer. She's moving closer. Ma'am, ma'am. Ma'am, don't don't, don't don't come down here. Don't come down here! The old lady can't hear her. Oh, no oh, no no no no. And Lenny uses his arm and pushes her against the cop car and like slime is dripping from his arm and covering her, dripping down her bare legs. And she's grossed out and appalled, and his monstrous breath is just beating her face. Oh, no, don't kill me, Lenny. Don't kill me! And then she loses sight of the old lady for a second. And then Lenny stops in one of his arms drops. He turns around just in time for the old lady to smack him with the walker. 2.5s

U1

You bitch! 

U2

He says, and sort of drops Chloe off the car and goes to defend himself, puts his arm up, and that's when Chloe kicks the back of his leg and he sort of loses balance in between the two of them. They managed to push him to the ground. 3.1s Well, I say that about takes care of that, the old lady said, readjusting her walker, and she just starts to walk off. Excuse me, ma'am. Um, shouldn't we call somebody? The old lady glances at the dead cop on the ground and says, like, looks at, um. Chloe, almost with a look of understanding about just the way the world is and the way things work. She just nods her head. No, and she starts to walk away again. Um. It's raining so hard now, by the way, that she almost disappears, like within five feet. Um, 1.6s and that's when the street light goes out. Chloe finds herself standing there in the dark with two. Well, one dead person and one. 1.7s Badly beaten creature. She starts to back away, trips over one of the bodies, and then finds that her hand is landed in something smooshy, so she's having a hard time getting up. She gets back up 1.2s and now she can see that Lenny is moving again. He's starting to stand. So she runs. She runs up the street 

U1

and soon finds herself. Um. 3.9s

U2

She soon finds herself downtown, and she's in front of the old, 1.1s

U1

um, Johnson Theater. 1.8s

U2

She. All the businesses are closed because it's after midnight now. Um, but she looks in the window and she she just smashes the window 1.1s and she goes in. 1.5s She goes through the lobby. Some of the, um, some of the poster lights have been left on. It's like, very dim nighttime mode. Um, so she passes all these old, uh, plays some old and some new, uh, pictures of. 1.2s Vaudeville gals and chick 

U1

chicks. Yes. Vaudeville. Sorry. Shakespeare. Shakespeare. Just a lot of Shakespeare. Uh, and even a Vincent. Terrence. Tito film. Uh, not film. The one stage play that Vincent, Terrence Tito had done. It was a one man show about his life 1.3s failed. Why did they keep that poster up? Um, she hops over. Uh, 1.1s the. 1s It's not a popcorn stand. It's 

U2

a concession stand. 

U1

Thank you. She. She hops over a concession stand, and she hides. She hides. Take it. 1.1s Oh, man. This is. 2.1s We gotta fix that next episode. She says. 2.9s There's rustling at the door, and she's convinced that it's Lennie. Oh, fuck. You found me. He's thrilled me. He's. He's on to me. He's. And then the door creaks. He. And then there's that squishing sound of him walking. 4.3s

U2

She hides behind the concession stands and she's watching. And she's looking over. 1.7s

U1

Over the top, just barely. Just enough to see him. And sure enough, he's squelching across the lobby and into the darkness. But he walks past her into the main theater, into the, uh, yeah, the theatre. And then she's like, oh, thank God. And she turns and she goes towards the door. She thinks she can get out without him getting. But before she does, she hears something and she stops. What the hell is that? And she hears what can only be an applause. And it's so jarring to her. She's like, what an applause in an abandoned theatre. That's nuts. 1.1s And she wants to run. She yearns to run. But she doesn't. She can't. She's drawn. Now all the lights are coming on in sequence. 2.4s

U2

And then. 1s She can just barely see through the opening, the the curtains drawer open and two people. Oh, they're not people. Their ghosts step onto the stage and she can't help herself. She starts marching in toward the theater, and she sees what used to be Lennie standing 1.3s in the alley in the aisle way, staring, and she watches as a room full of ghosts burst into an applause as two people begin reciting Shakespeare. What the fuck is this? She says, and she still wants to run, but she can't look away as they begin to perform. Hamlet. Whoa! She says, and the same part of her that has been screaming to run now says, you can't. You must stay. 1.2s And she's torn. 4s

U1

So she's realizing that she's while dealing with this otherworldly creature that Lenny has become, she's walked into a. 1.1s A ghost story, basically. Um, but she wonders if these are malicious ghosts, if they even are aware of her existence, if they're if they're not just on a loop doing their thing. 1.9s Um. 1.9s But she's so mesmerized by this that she doesn't realize that Lenny has snuck up behind her and he hits her on the head. She falls to the floor, looks up at him. No, Lenny. 1.5s Lenny starts to swing again, but she rolls out of the way and he is sort of unable to hold his own body weight, so he falls into one of the chairs. She runs back out to the lobby where the concession stand was. 2s Um. 1.9s I know how I want to wrap this up. 2.1s And she sees that now there is a ghost out here as well at the concession stand. Um, he's smiling at her. Does he know I'm here? 1.2s He he starts to wave her over to me. So she she approaches. 1.7s She can hear that Lenny is mumbling to himself. Um, still, he's like he. Every time he keeps trying to get up, he keeps falling into more chairs. So he's just like in a chair trap. Um, he she leans over the concession stand, um, to where the man is standing and sees that he's standing by an open register. And there's just all kinds of money in there. Hundreds, hundreds, 50s. 1.3s And he smiles and just nods his head. 1.4s She looks back at the theater door and sees that it's open now, and Lenny's standing there again, and he starts to stalk towards her again. She looks at the money and doesn't even think about it. She just grabs it all and shoves it into her pockets and then she runs. 1.9s And she gets away. 3.1s

U2

Okay. 3.9s

U1

The next day, 1.6s she's far away and she's sitting in an old diner looking up at just drinking a coffee, her hands shaking. She's still dirty and wet. Nobody's really asking her any questions. Lady comes by, the waitress comes by and pours her another cup of coffee, and she hears that somebody say, hey, turn the TV up. So they. Somebody does. And she looks over and sees this little old TV up above. The breakfast bar is playing the news, the morning news. They're talking about 1.2s a man that was found, um, purportedly to have broken into the downtown Johnson Theater. And nobody could understand why the money was missing. But he didn't have it, so it was a mystery. And when they showed the man it was Lenny. But it was just Lenny again. Take it, I mean. Done. Don't take it, please. 

U2

Fin 1.4s

U1

the end. 7.6s The writer's block. 3.3s

U2

Cool kids. 1.1s Subscribe. 1.8s And tune in next week. 2.5s For the next episode. 2.2s

U1

Writer's block. 1.7s The coolest podcast of all time. Time. Time. 

U2

Time. 1.5s