103. How to know you're no longer playing small

In this episode, I share my own personal truths about moving to a new level and the three signs that show up when you start to up-level your game.

TALKING POINTS:

SIGN #1: YOU START TO FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE [1:26]
SIGN #2: YOU'RE FEELING A LITTLE LOST [5:31]
SIGN #3: YOU HAVE NAYSAYERS [6:49]

AHA! QUOTES:

• "WITHIN THAT FEAR I DON'T WANT TO SHOW UP BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE THAT'S GOING TO COME ACROSS IN MY MESSAGING" [3:44]
  
  
• "THE ONLY WAY YOU'RE GOING TO FIND SUCCESS IN THE WORLD IS IF YOU FULLY SHOW UP AUTHENTICALLY AS YOU" [8:41]
  
  

HANDY TOOLS:

• FREE GUIDE TO STARTING YOUR ONLINE HUSTLE!
  
  

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

Welcome to the dream Hester's podcast on Ventek and unfiltered advice on how to build your dream business online. I'm your host Shane Wrecker, business and mindset coach. I teach women how to turn their passion into their purpose and make a profit online, my guess. And I keep everything super real here for you with our stories, our tips and advice. Welcome to today's episode. Hey everyone, welcome to this quick minute with Shana and I apologize. I had been a little, a

Speaker 2: 0:27

little bit mia from the podcast and even actually on socials in the last little um, and the week or so. And uh, I've just been, you know, I've been a little overwhelmed. I've been traveling for my network marketing business and a, and then I'm back and then I'm leaving again for my coaching business. I have a mastermind next week that I'm going to in La and it's just been a little bit of chaos in between those weeks, but that's okay. That's, it was just a season. I'm in a busy season and uh, so I missed a few podcast but I'm back today and I want to talk to you guys today about signs that you are no longer playing small. So I have three signs that you are, you are moving into a new level and most likely I'll come up with a couple more as we're, as we're chatting here today. Um, and I think that this is also a little bit, partly why I've been mia myself is I feel like I'm moving into a new level and when I, when that, that uncomfortableness, and that's number one is that you start to feel uncomfortable. The uncomfortableness I'm feeling as I know in my mind, in my mindset that I am ready to make the shift into the next place in my business. I get really uncomfortable and anxious and that anxiety that uncomfort actually makes me kind of go within. It makes me withdrawal. And because I'm, I feel like there's part of me that's maybe digesting a little bit of where I'm going and in that time and in that space, I need to be quiet and I need to think and I need to just, um, see how I maneuver, I guess. I know that it doesn't make sense, but I kind of have to see here like what is my next step? And sometimes that next step is a big step and that big that, that thinking about that big step actually makes me kind of with, it makes me retract. I actually go inward and I kind of just sit with it for a bit. And it's hard for me to be on social media. It's hard for me to go on stories and give value because I just, I feel, um, I feel uncertain about where I am. And so I don't want that uncertainty to come through in my voice, in my stories. And it's, it's, it's just a weird place. So that would be number one. The first sign that you're no longer playing small is that you feel uncomfortable and maybe you're doing things that you don't normally do. So I don't normally, you know, not show up on podcasts and on stories. Normally that's what I do, but I'm feeling the growth, I'm feeling the change, I'm feeling a shift and it's causing me to retract and just be still and silent for a bit. And I mean, yes, I've also been busy working on other things, but I still have lots of, there were still lots of opportunities I could show up on my stories and share, but I had been feeling energetically, uh, just off. And I don't like to show up in those spaces when my energies are not in a great place. I think that that's absolutely a sign that you're moving to another level. You're moving to the next place because energetically I can feel myself expanding and it feels scary and that's the energy I have is a bit of fear. And so that, in that, within that fear, I don't want to show up because I feel like that's going to come across in my messaging. And I feel a little bit, um, it's a, it's like the ground. My, my footing is, is not stable. And I think that that's, that's the, that's the visual I get is that the, my footing is not stable and the ground is starting to open up a bit and I'm not sure what's going to happen. So instead of putting myself out there, I tend to come inward and just wait and see. I don't know if that makes sense, but I truly believe that that is a sign that you're no longer playing small, that you're starting to take steps that are scary and it makes you feel uncomfortable and it makes you feel a little bit unsure. And in those moments, um, you may be taking different actions. You may be going inward or maybe for you, you do the opposite and maybe you're talking about it all the time. Maybe you're showing up and sharing that all the time. Um, but you're definitely taking a year. Things are just different. You're not doing the things that you would normally do on a day to day basis. When you stop playing small and you start putting yourself in an uncomfortable chair, I feel like you, you shift the way that you are now. That doesn't mean I'm going to be like this forever. It just means I'm like this right now while I'm sorting through what this next level looks like for me. What am I actually, you know, going to be changing. What is it that I'm going to be doing? What decisions am I going to be making? And once those things are set, once I get through that uncomfortableness and I get the clarity of where that next phases for me, then watch out. I'm back and I'm like on fire and I'm, I'm just like out there. But in this moment of shifting, I tend to get quiet and so that's, that's how I know for me, I'm moving into a bigger zone. I'm moving into the, the bigger playing field assigned number two that you are no longer playing small is that you have no idea what you're doing, which kind of ties into the first one and the uncomfortableness, but you don't, all of a sudden you're like, I don't know how to do this. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know how to do a, uh, how to launch this kind of thing. I don't know how like some, for some people moving to the next level as launching a podcast, I don't know what the hell I'm doing. I don't know how to record. I don't know how to do episodes. I don't know how to do things. And it's, again, it's uncomfortable and it's scary, but you just all of a sudden feel like everything that I knew how to do now I'm in this place where I don't know how to do any of this stuff. Um, you know, it's, it's, it's, you're learning new things and now you need to implement them in these new things are going to take you to a new level. And in this new level, there's all these things that you don't know how to do anymore and you have to learn them. You have to retrain yourself. You have to show up in a different way. And I think that is absolutely a sign that you're no longer playing small, that you're shifting into a new place because all of a sudden you're experiencing all kinds of new things that you have no idea how to deal with, no idea what to do. And that is a is is an absolute sign that you are moving into the next level. My friends, number three, assign that you're no longer playing small is you have naysayers, you have people who are now saying that they don't agree with you and they're commenting on your posts, they're commenting on your profile, they're commenting on your videos, they're commenting on your podcast. Then you're getting messages in your inbox that they don't agree with what you're having to say. And I feel like, I know for me, part of moving to my next level is really opening up and being authentic about how I truly feel about things. And I know that's a next level for me and I know that actually if this stage in my business that is exactly what I'm going through is I'm realizing that in order for me to get to the next level, I need to really let the authentic version of myself come through and I feel like I haven't been doing that. I've been playing small by trying to do the things and say the things that I think everybody wants to hear and I know for me to move into that next level, I have to basically like rip off the show and let the true authentic Shayna out and I know that's why I've been retracting because that's what I need to do and there's a fear in that and letting myself out and letting my true thoughts out and letting the things that I truly believe that we need to do in life and in business in order to grow because there's some fear that people aren't going to like what I need, what I have to say. And so the naysayers I know are going to come out in those moments. But you guys, that's when, that's when you, that's when things start to really take shape. That's when, when you be your fully authentic self. And this is actually um, one of the things that I got from Rachel Hollis. I recently saw Rachel Hollis live in less in um, last week when I was in Vegas. And you know, she was talking about owning it, like just letting you out. And that's the only way you're going to find success in the world is if you fully show up authentically as you. And it really hit me that I wasn't doing that and I'm not doing that because I'm, I, there's a fear in there that people actually see me and they won't like me. And the reason that I have been kind of withdrawn and not out in the social media is, and not out, you know, posting and not out doing live videos and not out doing things is because I know I need to do that and it scares me. So I've been kind of withdrawn as I'm working through pushing myself to let my full authentic self come out. And I know I'm going to deal with the naysayers and I'm, I'm working through it and, and I don't have any idea how this is going to sound or look or what's going to come out of my mouth when I'm doing these things. But I, I need to do it. And so I'm uncomfortable. I have no idea necessarily what that's gonna look like. There's going to be naysayers, but it's what I need to do to get to the next level. It's what you need to do to get to the next level. And whatever it is that you're working on is to allow your true, authentic, authentic self and feelings and personality shines through the things that you do. And that's when you're going to see the connection. That's when you're going to see yourself, find the success, sell the products, you know, get the followers, do the things, um, you know, sell the products, do this, all the things right? You're going to see the growth not only in yourself, but in your business. And I truly believe that when you can let yourself out and you can deal with the naysayers because they're going to be there, um, and not let those things bother you, that's when you're going to find the confidence to allow yourself to come through even more is when you finally let it out and you deal with all of those things. Deal with the fact that you know, you know, you don't know exactly what's going to happen. You don't, you are going to feel uncomfortable and you are going to have the naysayers. When you allow yourself to come out and you deal with those things, you gain confidence and it becomes easier and easier and easier to just let you out. You know, watching Rachel on that stage, the reason she is such a success and the reason she would just blew the socks off that whole arena was because she was 100% authentically herself on that stage. And she said it like it is and she didn't care. She didn't care what anybody thought. She was sharing her authentic, true words of wisdom. And that's why people love her. And it was a real eyeopener for me about making decisions, not only, you know, for what I say on my lives and things and allowing myself to be truly, um, out there. But it's also like owning my decisions that I choose for myself and my business and my family. And knowing that I get to make the choices, I get to decide what I'm doing in my life and that I don't need to, um, you know, that I don't need to worry about what other people are going to think about what I'm doing because, and not make decisions because I'm worried about what they're thinking to just make the decisions, do the things, say the the talk, do the video, go live, share your feelings on whatever it is, you know. And as long as you're truly authentically being yourself, it's going to lead you in the right direction. And so I truly believe, you know, the signs that you're no longer playing small is that you are very uncomfortable and you have no idea really what you're doing and that there are people who are going to judge your actions and that's okay. Those are going to come each level you grow in your business, there are going to be more and more of these moments, more and more of these people, more and more of these comments. And in order for you to have that life, that business, that thing that you want, you're going to have to get over it. You're going to have to keep going despite the fact that they are out there, that there are naysayers that they, that you're uncomfortable and that you have no idea what you're doing. Most of us don't. Each level we get to, it's a whole new ballgame out there, you guys. And in order to figure it out, you've got to play the game. You gotta play the game to figure it out. So there you have it. You guys, um, the signs that you're no longer playing small is you need to get uncomfortable. You need to keep going even though you have no idea exactly what you're doing. And you need to just get past the naysayers and don't worry about what they think you need to show up. Let your freak flag fly. I love it. Own it. Get out there and do your thing. You guys, I hope that you found some value in this today. I hope that this motivated you to take action. I hope that this helped you, um, helped you move to the next level and stop playing small. You guys found value in this. You know what to do. Take a screenshot, share it in your Instagram. I love to reshare these and give you guys some exposure and give you some love, send you something in your dms and I appreciate you guys and I appreciate you listening to this podcast

Speaker 1: 13:35

and if you do feel so inclined, head over to iTunes. I would love it if you would leave me a five star review. I read all of the reviews there. Um, so please, I'd love to hear from you. Thanks so much everybody. I hope you're having an amazing day. I for now, thank you so much for joining us on today's episode. I hope you got such great value from it. But before I go, I want to ask you, have you ever wanted to start your own online business, build your brand, help others employed you've experienced, but having the first clue on even where to begin. You're tired of putting this idea off year after year out of fear for all I have something that can totally help you. I invite you to head over to Shana recker.com and pick up my six steps to building your online dream hustle free pdf. That gives you step by step advice on how to build your dream business online. Go ahead over to Shana recker.com and download it today. That's it for now. Girlfriends. Until next time.