Episode 80: Goodness That Grows with Mary Latham

In this episode of The Well-Tended Life podcast, I sit down with storyteller and kindness champion Mary Latham, founder of the nonprofit More Good Today. After losing her incredibly optimistic mother, Mary set out on a cross-country journey to gather stories of goodness—and what she discovered changed her life.

Over the course of three years and 43 states, Mary stayed with strangers and collected hundreds of real-life stories of human kindness. Her mission? To bring hope into hospital waiting rooms and remind us all that light still exists—even in our darkest moments.

Our conversation dives into grief, goodness, and what it really means to be present for one another. Mary shares how listening without judgment, giving your time freely, and choosing to see the good can quite literally transform a life—starting with your own.

This episode is a gentle, powerful nudge to slow down, look up, and love people better.

💛 Here are a few heart taps from this episode:

1️⃣ Sometimes, grief becomes the unexpected push that leads us into our most extraordinary purpose.

2️⃣ Despite what the headlines say—there are more kind and decent people in the world than we often realize.

3️⃣ Everyone you meet is carrying something. Let’s never assume otherwise.

4️⃣ A single act of kindness can echo through someone’s life for years—sometimes even decades.

5️⃣ Are we truly listening? In a noisy world, real connection starts with being fully present.

6️⃣ It’s okay if someone isn’t as present as we wish. Let’s meet them with grace—and lovingly invite them back to the moment.

So if your heart needs a reminder that goodness still grows, this episode is for you. Hit play and soak in this beautiful, hope-filled conversation.

Connect with Mary Latham:

In 2016, Mary Latham set out in her late mother’s Subaru, "Old Blue," on a cross-country journey to collect stories of human kindness from all 50 U.S. states. Over three years and 43,000 miles, she stayed in 154 strangers’ homes and shared her mission -More Good- at schools, churches, and community groups. Her journey gained national attention on platforms like MSNBC, The Today Show, and The Washington Post. Now the founder of More Good Today Inc., Mary is writing a book of these stories to donate to hospital waiting rooms and continues speaking to inspire hope and unity across the country.

Website: https://www.moregood.today/

A Whole New Way To Journal
Interested in learning more about my life-tending journal process?
Click Here for Your Free Life-Tending Journal Template

CULTIVATE U: A Life Changing 6-Week Virtual Masterclass
THIS IS YOUR SEASON. It’s time to CULTIVATE U: to water YOUR dreams, to unearth YOUR gifts, and finally tend to YOUR relationships, weeds, and needs.

Are you exhausted from watering everyone and everything else but you? Could your life, dreams, or relationships use some tending? Would you like to start living a life with less anxiety and more intention? Then click here for info on the next masterclass!

Speaking Of
Are you looking for a unique speaker? I would love to be a part of your next event! Let’s chat: keri@keriwilt.com

Let’s Get Connected
I want to cheer you on as you begin to clear away the clutter and debris that is keeping your from growing that thing that only you were meant to grow! Click below on your favorite social channel and introduce yourself in my DMs.
Instagram OR Facebook

Transcript

 Hey friends. Welcome to the Well-Tended Life Podcast. What is a well-tended life? Let me start by telling you what it is. Not a well-tended. Life is not a set it and forget it life, nor is it a perfect life. It is though a life that is worked on every day in the sunshine and through the storms. And the truth is what worked in our life gardens last year may not work in the next.

That's why. Here at the Welwood Life Podcast, we're interviewing people who have grown and bloomed true in a variety of seasons, and who are willing to share their well-attended wisdom and bead whacking advice with us. Listen in.

  Hello everyone and welcome to the Well-attended Live podcast. I'm your host, Kerry Wilt, a speaker, writer, and heart cultivator who is on a mission to help you and me grow through any season.

Now, today's episode is rooted in one of the most tender truths from my great-great grandmother's book, the Secret Garden, and it says, where you tend to rose, a thistle cannot grow. And it's a reminder that when we choose to focus on the good, when we water it, when we protect it, when we hold space for it, there's simply less room for negativity, fear, and hopelessness that so often tries to take over.

And our guest today, Mary Latham, is someone who has made it her mission to tend to the roses in the most literal and beautiful way. I'm gonna let her tell you the story behind it. So I'll just say she's the heart behind. For good today, a nonprofit and soon to be book that will live in hospital waiting rooms offering hope where it is most needed.

And y'all, this conversation isn't just about kindness. It's gonna be about grief and grit and healing power of strangers and the life-changing magic of choosing to see the good when it would be easier not to. So settle in. Friend. This episode will remind you that even the tiniest seed of good when tended well, can bloom into something that can change everything.

So let's dig in. Welcome Mary. Thank you. Thank you so much for having me. Oh, I'm so excited. And honestly, I didn't even think about it until just now that you, your name is the lead character in the book, the.

It's true. And actually it's funny because bouncing super forward right now, but one of my dreams in life is to, I've renovated this tiny little place that I think is the most special place on a marsh, on Long Island. And I really wanna eventually, at some point give it to people to gift them a little bit of a respite if they can't afford to take any vacation and they have a sick member of their family or have gone through a tragedy.

And the biggest thing I wanna do is I've created a list of almost 300 people that have impacted my life in a really special way. And I've written to them and explained what I wanna do with this house. And I said, if you'd like to be a part of this, I'd love for you to contribute a copy of your favorite book.

And I would like. No tv, no. Nothing is gonna be in this house. There's no wifi still. Just books everywhere and games for like your family to play. And that way the book, the house will be filled with all my favorite people's favorite books. And the first one I got was The Secret Garden.

Oh, I love that. That I just thought I'd share that with you. Yeah, so it's gonna be a library of of books for people to choose from, but Secret Garden was number one. I love that. I love that you are cultivating a space where people can, rest and and just be in recovery. I love that.

Thanks. Yeah, I'm excited.

Let's go back. Let's start with tell people who you are and tell them what led you and how you arrived at your current mission and path and purpose. Yeah, so before I had this little house to renovate and figure out I guess I lived in a car.

I got on this specific mission of searching for more good in honor of my mom. My mom passed away in 2013 and she was just a relentlessly optimistic person. And, my absolute favorite person in the world and she had cancer. She was diagnosed originally when I was 11 years old, and it came back years later and I just was under the impression that we would fight it again and everything would be fine.

But she ended up at Sloan Kettering and. We were given the news after a procedure did not go well, that it would be a few hours or days before she passed. And it was in that room really where my entire idea was born from a conversation we had where she inspired me, that despite all the tragedies and horrible things that would inevitably happen in our lives and in the world, there would always be more good out there if we looked for it.

And so after she passed away, I decided that I was going to pack up her old Subaru and drive across America and look for it. I had started a little project before that of just asking people to share positive stories and good news. But like anything that you start in life, there's this tidal wave of excitement and everyone's cheering you on and stuff, and then it can die out and the wave goes out and you lose.

Your enthusiasm for it. And so instead of getting discouraged when that happened with just asking people to share the stories, I figured I would just go out there and look for them myself and dig them up. And so I got on the road in 2016 and I went to all 50 states. I stayed with strangers to be able to financially and emotionally get myself across the country.

And I spent three years and 31 days over 43,000 miles across America to compile all the stories of acts of human kindness and good that we don't really get to hear about in the news as much or just in general. And I plan to compile them all into a book to donate, to hospital waiting rooms, to give people a little shred of hope when they have to sit in there.

Wow. Okay. So three years in, would you say? How many months? So three years, 31 days, four hours and 16 minutes. But who's counting? I love that. First of all, I love the preciseness of that. Now how long has it been since you've been on the road? Are you still continuing this journey afterwards or was there a down period in between?

So I got on the road with the plan to finish all 50 states and then got off the road in 2019 the end of 2019. So right before the pandemic began, which was funny because a lot of people asked me, or they would always comment like, thank goodness you finished this trip before the world shut down.

And I was relying on strangers every day, but especially for shelter. And so they were like, no one would've let you in their home. One of the first things I remember when the pandemic started and we were all just really scared and not sure what was going on, was a woman who I collected a story of whose husband had been murdered and had she had a lot of children at home and ended up creating this really beautiful thing in New Jersey where if there's a tragedy this organization that she has created in honor of her husband immediately steps in and starts helping because the community did that for her when she went through her tragedy.

So if someone's house burns down or something like that happens, they come in immediately and help you. They're mowing the lawn and they're doing whatever. And she sent me a text message like day two and was like. I don't know if you're still on the road or where you are. My kids are home, but we do have a space in the basement.

If you need a place to live or be right now to get off the road, please know that our house is open to you. So it was really interesting just like the way people, we were trying to be funny and whatever, and oh, no one would let you in, but yet that was my first memory is someone reaching out and being like, you're welcoming.

So that was really beautiful. But I, yeah, I finished the actual trip in all 50 states November 30th, 2019. And then I thought I would full circle my trip by going back to the place I first moved when my mom died, which was St. John in the US Virgin Islands. And I figured I would go there and I would get my last story there, and it would be such a full circle moment because that was where, the whole thing began, where I took the leap of faith and trusted strangers and all of this stuff.

But I got there and then the world shut down and then I was stuck there for six months in a pretty wildly toxic environment to be completely honest. So it rocked me for sure. I was trying to write, but, being in a very small, tiny community, during that time when no one really knew what was going on, having my family, in New York, which felt like the worst place to be, and it was just it was really scary.

But also I was, I couldn't get home and I wasn't even sure I wanted to go home because of travel and everything. So yeah, that took a while to recalibrate. And then I started the writing and it's really two books. It's the book for the hospital waiting rooms of all of the short stories of people I met, just like incredible humans across America that work are working tirelessly for the good.

And then it's my story and, my journey since my mom passed and getting on the road and all the strangers I stayed with and maybe the guys I dated, all the behind the scenes. Yeah. And I beat myself up for so long, about how long it was taking me to process, to write, to do all of this stuff, but.

I don't think that the girl that got off of the road trip would've been able to write this book at all. I think she was very broken, very tired, very unhealthy. And and I don't, I think I really needed this time to think about what I wanna say about what I saw. And so I'm probably three quarters through both books right now and hopefully rolling towards that finish line.

Yeah, it's interesting 'cause that's the part I'm so curious about is yeah, three years plus I'm not gonna remember the number That's okay. Being on the road just three years in general at that time of life is hard, right? Your life looked different all the time.

And how do you even take care of yourself while you are, while really you are. Also pouring out right into these people around you and taking on their stories internally. Did you struggle with any of that? Oh yeah. You said you came back broken a little bit, right? Yeah. I think that it's so interesting 'cause one of the most popular questions I get asked is, was this healing for you in a way, to listen to all of these other stories or to connect with all of these other people.

Did it help you heal through your own loss? And it's always makes me like, laugh out loud because it feels like it was not at all like it. Yeah. If anything it like ripped me open a million times more. But I think that there was a lot of beauty in the perspective that I got just from realizing like, I was the person that got on the road and felt I.

Really sad that she lost her mom and her best friend and all of these things. And I think that going across the country and meeting people who maybe didn't have a relationship with their mom or had lost them as a child or lost three members of their family, or, whatever happened it was a very big punch in the face of perspective.

But I would not call it healing. I would definitely say that it was it was really just like a very growing and learning experience to, to meet all of these people and to be inspired by them, to use them as a guide of how to put one foot in front of the other and keep moving through life after loss.

Because you are navigating grief, which I lost my dad two years ago and I don't think anything prepares you for losing a parent. Yeah. I don't know that anything prepares you for losing anyone, but it's such a unique thing. And it's like there's support group for people who have lost a spouse, there's support groups for people who've lost a child.

But there's this, there's this thing that happens when you lose a parent that you almost feel like untethered somehow. It disconnects you from the thing that you were rooted to. Yeah. In a way more than anything else it feels and I just wonder if, it's almost like if it feels to me from the outside looking in like that this was almost a part of that untethering of the journey. Yeah. Yeah. In a weird way. It's like you can't accept that they're not in the world that they brought you into, that they're not in this world anymore. You go on this like insane odyssey to just find them however and wherever you can. Yeah, and I think I did, I found her in so many of my hosts that like mothered me or just the way people came together and supported and cared for me.

Like a mother would just that like parental feeling of support. I think that yeah, I think I was just like on a constant search to find her and to also just like. Prove to myself that she was right, because I think so much of the, way I worded it was like my mom said this thing and I'm gonna prove it.

But all along I really needed to just prove it to myself to know there was still good out there when everything felt so dark. Yeah. Would you call yourself, would you have called yourself an optimistic person before? The way you describe your mother was like, she was just insanely optimistic.

Would you say that was your natural state before this journey or, yeah. Yeah. I think I've always been like a pretty big. Dork when it comes to that. I definitely was the kid in kindergarten, like noticing the person on the playground that didn't have a friend and go in and sitting with them not understanding oh, maybe someone will make fun of you 'cause you're talking to that kid, like thinking like they're all alone.

They need someone to talk to also. So I think I've always paid attention and I've always tried, I'm the youngest of four kids, so I'm always like trying to make people laugh or get paid attention to a little bit or crack a joke, or I guess just make people feel better after they leave me.

And so I think that was a huge part of who I was. And I think I lost a lot of that when she died because I was so depressed. And there was definitely like a patch of time in there where I wasn't that optimistic person and was like drinking a lot of weirdly white Russians. And watching like really terrible television, which like, I never, we grew up without tv.

I don't really watch tv, but just like drowning myself and numbing myself in a way. And then I think I was, it startled me so much that it made me realize I need to like, pivot and really find a way to keep being myself, but also carrying her out in a way too, to honor her and her message. And I was always still putting it out there, but I was struggling internally a lot with it.

Even though I was sharing good stuff, I felt like I don't, why am I even doing this? No one's even paying attention and I'm not even happy, so it was a lot of internal struggle. So getting on the road felt like. No, nothing felt scary anymore. When you lose a parent it's wait, what?

Now? They're like, I can't just call them. And, that feels like the, like to me the scariest thing was always gonna be to lose my mom. And and so that had already happened. So who cares? Get in the car. Let's go. Let's see what's gonna happen, oh my gosh.

 Hey, hey, hey. Have you heard the news? I am so thrilled to announce that I have partnered with Melissa Gilbert of Little House on the Prairie Fame and her company and community over@modernprairie.com. You'll find me there most days. Teaching the topsoil of my life, tending, journaling, practice, leading an accountability and check-in group called the Journaling Gems Club, which is designed to help you to not just get journaling, but to stay journaling all while building some community along the way.

Or you can find me hosting and hanging out in a brand new part of their app that is dedicated to all things journaling. Sound like fun. Check out the link in the show notes to download the Modern Prairie app today. Then you can join the journaling circle and sign up for the class or join the club today.

I can't wait to see you there.

 Were there times throughout, those years where you realized that your motivational or your emotional wellbeing was starting to suffer?

Were there, was there anything that you were able to do throughout that, to like even just find some alone time with, with staying with people and all of those things to recharge, was there anything that you found that worked for you? It's so funny, the emotional, mental wellbeing was for sure challenged every day.

Every single day. But  it would be really funny 'cause I would always say, I have these journals from the trip, like five journals, and it looks like a drunk kindergartner wrote them, so they're no bestsellers. But it started off strong in the beginning, but yeah, then it really became just bullet points because you would be up with these strangers all night and talking with them, and by the time you hit bed, like you were just writing the bare minimum.

And so every night I would get to the next house I was gonna get to and whatever town or whatever state I was in, and I would pull into the driveway and I would have a pep talk with myself quietly okay. Tonight, Mary, we're gonna go in, we're gonna be polite, we're gonna have a nice dinner.

Maybe we'll accept their one glass of wine. That's it though. And then we're going to, share a nice story and we're going to go to bed by 10 o'clock and get some sleep and drink some water. And you would get in there and they'd be like, you want a margarita? No. They would they would always offer you a drink, I think in 154 homes.

Three didn't drink. And of course it's it's awkward for them. You're a stranger walking into their home. For me, I'm a stranger walking into their home. I just listened to sad stories all day long. Like I just got there and now I'm gonna have to give my spiel for the billionth time. Of course, I'm gonna have a margarita.

So anyway, we sit down, we start hanging out and talking, and I start sharing stories with them and just to watch. How much it shifts everything when they start hearing these stories and how much better they're starting to feel. And then, just having these really lovely conversations and to have them open up to you and share these beautiful moments of their own lives.

And before you know it, it's like one in the morning because for them it's just one or two nights. Yeah. But for me it was every night and then I would be falling into bed again and I'd be so tired the next morning. But it was crazy because I would be utterly exhausted when I pulled in that driveway and gave myself that pep talk.

And the second I started telling 'em some stories and watching them get cheered up and having that interaction, it was like this adrenaline that would come out of nowhere every time. And that is what gave me the energy. Every story I met, every person that hosted me, every connection, even though I was, could barely imagine making one more connection, it would be the energy that would keep me going in a crazy way.

So it was like. Sword. It's interesting because people say, when you know you're in your gifting, it's easy, right? Even when things are hard all around you, when you are doing that thing that you are supposed to be doing that it feels like that, right? It does give you energy and you do all of a sudden out of nowhere get that.

So . I hope that's a confirmation to you that it is, you were right where you were supposed to be yeah. In all of that. But gosh, yeah. No wonder you came back just physically, emotionally, all the things broken on the other side. What did you do to unravel it on the other side?

Because I would also think just that go becomes such a part of your hard wiring, right? Of like when there's nowhere to go. Yeah. Was that part of the hard part of sitting up, like getting off of the road? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was horrible because it was like, I'm a wedding photographer as well, and so I always say, brides plan a year of their life around this one day, and then you have the day and then the next day it's almost like a depression.

Yes. Because it's like that was what you were doing, that was your job planning your wedding. And so for me it felt like that, it was like the next day was this like depre ah, like every day was figuring out, everything, how to connect to a local paper, how to connect to a local radio station, where is the gas station in town?

Order some more and more good shirts to give each host. Make sure you're updating your website post something on social media. Like it was like, yeah. Failing things. And so to just then have it be over was like. I think that I never, people would always ask did you listen to a podcast or anything like that on the road?

And I think I listened to one episode of Serial and was like, I can't listen to this on the road. I'm tra I'm a girl traveling alone, gonna get murdered. So I did not listen to anything, but mostly because it was like, I never had 15 hour drives. I would always break it up to 2, 3, 4 hours between each stop and everything and try to hit different areas in each state so it wasn't just like one specific place since everything is so different in each state.

But it was really like you were always with people. So all of the time you were either in the person's home or in the person, like in a coffee shop meeting up story or whatever you were doing. So that like tiny little time you had in the car. Like I wouldn't even put music on sometimes.

Yeah. 'cause it was just like processing. And so I think that there was a very deep. Loneliness in that I was experiencing so many things, but by myself. So like it was hard to relate and convey those things to like my friends back home that's lives were continuing, they were getting married, having kids, and I lived in a car.

So I think that that large gap between the way our lives were going was really challenging, but also just to wi be witness to so much magic and then not be able to have anyone next to you witnessing it too. And then so there was a really serious loneliness in that, but not like a people loneliness because I was always around people.

So you'd cherished any moments you were alone. But when I got off the road. It was a, to have been with people 24 7, and then to sit alone in an apartment during a global shutdown and try to write about it was ex overwhelmingly isolating. And it just felt very weird. To go from one side of the spectrum to the other.

Oh my gosh. Yeah. I can't imagine that's what I kept thinking was the same thing you were talking about the wedding. My husband's an Ironman and it's the same thing. Like he trains trains, and then there's that day and then you're done. And he just every single time it's we're like, okay remember this is where we are.

Like we need to have a plan for what's after that because it's just all the stuff you were doing before, just that buildup and that, that loneliness on the other side. Gosh it's first of all what do you hope people. A hear from your stories and from this thing that you did what do you what did you, and how about let's go here.

What did you learn? What's, what was your biggest, couple ahas from your experience going across the road? I think that I would say the ultimate gift that we can give anyone, strangers, family, anyone in our lives is our time. So many of the moments of human kindness that people would share with me were really just moments where they were offered time from someone in their lives, or just people were, paying attention.

One of my favorite stories, which was like one of the smallest stories from the whole trip was a woman who was a bank teller. And she was like, I think in her mid twenties and she was working I think it was Block Island. And she was working one summer and she was having a really bad day, and a customer came in and was withdrawing money.

And they looked up at her and they said, are you okay? Is there anything I can do for you? Because she had been visibly crying and she was super embarrassed. And she said, oh no, you know nothing, some m and ms won't fix when I get outta work later. And they laughed and the customer left.

And 30 minutes later the customer came back in and she slid a bag of m and ms under the window to her and walked out. And the bank teller never saw her again. And she was writing me this note 30 years later and she had told her kids and her grandkids and it was the second week of my trip. And I remember thinking like, oh, maybe her like boyfriend broke up with her that day, or she stubbed her toe or whatever.

Something happened that was upsetting her. And by the end of the trip I was like, her uncle could have died in a car crash. She could have been diagnosed with breast cancer that week. Like we have no idea what other people are navigating around us. And it's usually those really dark moments that make that light stand out so much for this woman to remember so clearly and tell me the story 30 years later.

You just, you really never know. And everyone always thought that these stories had to be these like massive grand gestures. And I did have those, I had the two girls that lost their father from kidney failure and then each donated a kidney in honor of their dad to each a stranger. And I sat with them in the hospital in Chicago the week they did it.

Like all these insane stories. But the m and m story was one that I came back to every time and would always share with people because it's so translatable, we can all do that. Maybe we can't donate a kidney. We can pay attention. And all that woman did was listen and heard what she said.

Half the time, how many of us are really listening? Like even on the road trip when people would hand me like, big blankets or things like that for my car. And I'm like, did they think I'm sleeping in that thing? Like absolutely not. I don't trust mys. I'm no Cheryl Strait. You're not gonna find me hiking a mountain by myself and trusting nature.

I would rather stay in the serial killer's home, trust strangers, but I'm not staying alone in the car by myself. I never was in the car and I would always mention that, and I didn't expect them to remember everything I was saying. I talk a lot, but I always found it interesting, what people would hear and how they would try to offer their help.

And it was probably gosh, where was I? I was in, outside of Philadelphia, I think in Westchester, Pennsylvania, and I stayed at this Italian couple. I. Carmela and she Carmela and Enzo and they made me this like Italian meal. And I was sitting with them the first night I got in and she noticed, she was like, which of course always felt like a backhanded thing when people would tell you how tired you looked.

But she was like, let's get you to bed after dinner. You look exhausted. And I was like, oh, thank you, Carmella. But she mentioned, what's your plan for the morning? And I was going to collect a story and she said, what do you eat for breakfast? And I said, I actually don't, usually my stomach is in thousands of knots every morning of the trip.

I really just focus on my caffeine intake, so like a shot of espresso. And we joked about that and we continued talking throughout dinner a little bit more. And I think she made a joke about what are you looking forward to the most when you get off the road? And I said, A massage. 'cause my back was broken from the driving.

And then I went to bed that night and the next morning they, both her Carmel and Enzo were both already at work when I walked downstairs at six 30 in the morning. And there was a little note and the whole espresso maker was he. And so it set up and all I had to do was press the button and he left like all the instructions and the little glass was already there.

And then there was a card and I opened up the card and it was like this beautiful card and a gift certificate to the local massage place down the street. And I just start crying like immediately. 'cause it was like, oh my God. She heard me like, and like people were so good to me all the time in helping me in different ways, but like for some reason that just it like got, I was like, oh yes.

Like it was just so kind. And so I think that's such a big thing right now is I don't think people aren't kind. I think people. Aren't listening. Yeah. I wrote down, they aren't present. I think we're all like rushing onto the next thing and we're so caught up in our own stuff that we're not even present with the person who is checking our, groceries.

We're not present. And when we are like truly present with someone, like we can't hear we can't see what they need in a profound way. But we have to quit being in such a rush and looking at our phones. Being engaged here rather than, and I guess nobody can see me, but I'm realizing so I just picked up my phone.

I was like, we're so engaged with our phones that we're not engaged face to face. Yeah. We're just on to the next thing. It's funny when you said, make sure your phone is in do not disturb mode, because that's the only mode it knows. I keep that thing on do not disturb all day long, all night long, and my dad and my sisters and brother can break through.

And that's it. And even sometimes some of the sisters have to be canceled too and not allowed to break through because they forget the rules on writing days. But I we could talk till the cows come home about social media being as Brene Brown, I think calls it the cesspool of humanity.

But what I found to be the most helpful, if I may offer you and please your listeners, a tip is that I went away recently just for the night like a staycation kind of idea with one of my good friends who owns a local restaurant out here. And she is one of the best people I know and she just is always working and always has to be on her phone or her iPad or computer or all three at the same time hanging off of her neck.

I don't even know how she does it. And we went away. And I brought a book and I mean I had my phone with me, but I left it in the room. And the first day we went and did one of those like plunge experiences. So like you're by a pool, but then you can go on a hot tub and stuff. So obviously in that part she wasn't on her phone, but then we were just sitting it like, drying off and enjoying it and she had to be working.

And so I took my book out, which that was like normal behavior. We're sitting at the pool, she can be on her phone. But then when we went to lunch, it was again, every time she would take her phone out, I would take my book out and not even to be like, I was just, you're not here so I'm gonna go back. 'cause the book was really good that I was reading.

And so I started reading my book and then it was like by dinner when she had to do something and I took my book out at dinner that she was like, oh my gosh. She's first of all, I wish I brought my book. Second of all, sorry. It's something about people realizing. That you are so not there, that they had to take a book out right now to re it's like more eye open.

And again, like it was no fault of hers. Like I understood she had to work, but like you start working and then you're sidetracked on Instagram or something, so like it spirals you so quickly. But we were sitting at dinner and just the fact that, 'cause I will never be that person where both of you are on your phone at dinner.

Like I'll never be that person. But she's on her phone and I'm just sitting there reading my novel by candlelight and she was probably like, oh my gosh. And put her phone away. But it's such a like very subtle, nice way of explaining to people around you whenever they're like, gonna ignore you when you're spending time together.

Okay, I'm just gonna start reading my book in front of you. And it like jolts them back and not in a mean aggressive way, but just so that's been my new favorite thing to do. I love that. I love that so much.

 Friends, let me ask you a few questions and I want you to answer them honestly. Are you exhausted from years of watering everyone and everything else but you? Does it feel like your gifts, dreams, and passions have been locked up tighter than the secret garden? Do you struggle with. Things like anxiety, jealousy, busyness, or maybe fear.

Would you like to see more joy, goodness, and growth in your life? Listen, if you've answered yes to any of these questions, I am thrilled to. To tell you that the fall session of Cultivate You has just been announced and it begins September 18th. Now, what is Cultivate You? Cultivate You is a six week online journey where I'll walk beside you and teach you new ways to water your dreams, unearth your gifts.

Finally tend to your relationships, needs, and needs in this live group experience, you will dig deep and discover a garden shed full of perennial tools that will help you to cultivate your best well-attended life For seasons to come, wanna learn more, check out the link in the show notes, or head over to the well tended life.com.

,  You're clearly in writing mode. Is that kind of where you are right now?

Or are you still on the road back and forth? Has this turned you into a permanent nomad, I guess is probably my bigger question. It is definitely made it really hard to put down roots for sure. Just because it's hard to come back to a place that everyone else has moved on and you're in your.

Place now. And like just, I love to travel in general. I'm still always like collecting stories. I love that now people will reach out to me and just that I wouldn't usually always talk to and be like, I thought of you today, a more good story happened and share some beautiful thing. Like I thought of you.

Instead of oh, I'm gonna call you and complain about a bunch of stuff, like something good happened and I thought of you. That's been one of the most beautiful parts of the trip. But when I did get off the road about two years later after, things were settling down from the pandemic and stuff, I set more good officially up as a 5 0 1 C3.

And I've done a couple smaller community events in my hometown. I. We had two families that lost, one lost a child to cancer and one lost a mother. Really young mom to COVID. Both extremely loved in the community. It was a really huge hits for our town. And so I asked people that Christmas to share on a postcard or a note or something all over the country.

I asked them to send in an act of kindness that they were gonna do that week. And. Like anonymously. And so people sent tons of postcards in and I hung them at a local restaurant amongst snowflakes. And I had a huge art auction. Local artists donated stuff and invited the two families just for them to be able to read all of the stories and just have a moment to honor their lost loved one and raised almost $19,000 actually in the community and just split it in two and gave each family.

Money for their scholar. They both had already set up scholarships. We did a breast cancer mud run for our local North Fork Breast Coalition to raise money for them. And the, so usually my my shirts that I would give to each host that hosted me on the road trip because they kept me going and they'll be, yay, they'll definitely be in the book.

Say more good. Yeah. Yeah. But for the breast cancer one, the two o's of good were two boobs. So I was really proud of that one. I love that. Toilet paper's, not on food stamps. It's a necessity. So for Halloween, I inspired everyone to roll by with the toilet paper so that we could toilet paper homes but in a good way and donated all of those toilet paper to our local food shelter.

Just a lot of stuff like that, like trying to like, walk around, see where the need is. I worked with my local high school this year their journalism class. I told them my whole story of why my trip began which was originally a moment of kindness when someone got a hundred dollars gift card and ran it out on all the people behind him on online.

And I spoke to my mother that day when it had happened, which was when we had that conversation. And so I said, if you were given a hundred dollars. Where do you see the need if you walk around your community, put your phones in your pocket and look around, where do you think the need is and how could you help?

And so they all wrote up little like grant applications and then I granted them each the a hundred dollars. One kid, it was so beautiful, it made me cry. He wrote this whole thing about older people being the biggest need in the community and their loneliness. And so he wanted to go into the local nursing home and have a craft day and do puzzles and spend time with them.

So just like really cool to see what the kids would come up with as well. So yeah, I've been trying to actively continue to do stuff just because seeing it is, and being part of it is more where my gift and energy is than sitting behind a desk by myself trying to write up my road trip.

But I think it's really important to get these stories down and out into hospital waiting rooms just because there's such hopeless feeling places. And to just put something in there that would give people a little bit of a little bit of hope, but also a little bit of inspiration to just see okay, here's someone that went through something like I did, and what did they do?

How did they right? Move forward and find ways to keep their person alive and honor them by doing good. I love it. I love it. I love it.



We are actually gonna move on to the second part of the interview where I ask everybody the same questions. And you really already talked about the season that you're in and of where you are right now in life.

But, so let's move on to the regular practices. Do you, outside of I guess maybe giving yourself a pep talk on the road, do you have any regular practices that might help you or us to live our best well-attended lives? What are you doing to ca take care of you on the other side of all this?

So I would say the best thing I did, which is not necessarily, it was a big leap, but I. My favorite state across America was Alaska. And last summer I went back to Alaska. I lived in a tiny little homestead cabin with a tiny bit of freezing cold running water. It did have electricity and I worked in a garden that I would say gardening.

Like just being in nature has been one of the most beneficial things. Not to connect to the secret garden again here. Yeah. But by far gardening for sure. I think it's so cool that they put gardens in prisons where they can like, here's these like mass acts, murders that are like delicately taken care of, a plan and understanding empathy again.

But yeah, really just like walking and being outside in nature and gardening, I would say are like the biggest things that help ground me. Awesome. All right. And then the last question is actually rooted in my journaling practice. And because I I teach this all over, and for me, I couldn't agree more with your mission.

 And now it's time for my favorite part of the interview because it's inspired by my life tending journal practice. But let me be clear, this is not your grandma's journal. It's more of a growth chart, reflection, diary, planting reminder, observation deck, and research notebook all rolled into one. And when used daily, this journal practice is a life changer.

To produce big, beautiful purpose-filled blooms in any season. Now it's by far the most important tool in my own personal life gardening shed. And I wanna gift you a free journaling template today. So check out the link in show notes, or head over to the midlife. Get started today.

 I believe in looking back every day to spot the joy, goodness and growth because it does cultivate hope, right? If you look back on every single day and realize that it's there when the hard days come, you know that they're gonna show up there too. And so as a part of that practice I ask people to tell me where are you seeing joy these days?

Like what brings you joy? I think that. Like little beautiful things. So I have a bunch of tiny little VAEs on my window sill with diff a different flower in each one. Are those little mini ones? Yeah. Let's, I've seen those recently. The cutest thing in the world. Some of them are just old ones from this old house, but just little tiny, I don't know.

I like have a window seat and I put flowers and like a pretty blanket and a pretty pillow. And sometimes I just walk by and look at it and it just, it brings me joy. So just little yes pieces of, I'm very visual as a photographer, so I love like vintage beauty, like old wood and stuff like that.

So I think yeah, I would say it's so cheesy, but I think that's why cliche things exist. But like flowers, coffee and books, that's joy. A hundred percent. Okay. The next one is goodness, and it's really the goodness for which you're grateful for. So this would be something that you would list in a gratitude journal.

What are you feeling grateful for right now? Probably my nieces and nephews. It's like nice to have them and then give them back. But also like they're to know, they're in a lot of ways miniature versions of you and I'm not sure, where my life is leading or what path that might be.

Have always really wanted to be a mom, but to have these little children that even look like me too. And just, they're such good kids. They're so cool. And so they definitely bring me a lot of joy. I love it. Okay. And the last one is growth. And growth is always the hardest thing to spot on a daily basis.

'cause growth happens in tiny little shoots. But where are you experiencing the most growth in your life right now? I guess just learning to be kind to myself. I think that like when you see so much need all of the time, you constantly feel like you shouldn't even be taking a moment off and you could be calling someone or helping someone, or what if someone's having a bad day and needs you to cheer them up, like finally learning how to show up for yourself first.

That's, and it's an, that's a part of the occupational hazard that I, it never even occurred to me that you would run into, but that makes a lot of sense. And I know even sometimes when you see all this other hurt and pain and things that people are going through, sometimes we all can think my thing is not that big a deal.

Yeah. My pain, my heartache, my depression, it's not as bad as this person's was. I do, I even have a right. So I, yeah, I love that you're digging in there and doing the work on that piece. Mary, thank you so much for coming and today with us. Tell people how they can find you, follow you, all the things.

So the website is more good today.com and there's usually links to everything on there on Instagram. It's more good today on Substack, where I started writing up my stories. So yeah, so more good today, dot substack.com. But all the links are on that one website. More good today.com.

Awesome. I am so excited. I can't wait for people to read all of them. I can't wait for you to continue to write them all. I know that once you get to the end of that's another weight and another finish line for you. And I can't wait to see what's on the other side of even that for you.

Alright. Thank you everyone who has been listening to the podcast. I sincerely hope that this episode today has inspired you to get out there and do something bold, but also to find the good in every single day in order for us to live out our best well-attended lives. So until next time, y'all.

Blessings and blooms. Thank you, Mary. Thank you so much, Carrie.

 Oh my goodness, y'all, that was so good. Don't forget to check the show notes for my favorite Heart Tap moments from this episode. What is a heart tap? Well, whenever I read, listen to a podcast or watch a speaker, I'm always on the lookout for those like head bob, heart tap, and aha moments. You know what I'm talking about.

These are the things that cause your head to Bob, an agreement, your heart to make that tap. When a much needed word of wisdom comes along or your soul to scream, aha, that was the word I was looking for. So for each episode, I like to share a few of my heart taps in the show notes with you, but I'm curious.

What are your heart tap moments? From today's episode? Run on over and direct. Message me your favorite moments, questions, heart taps, and more over at Instagram or Facebook today. And if you are inspired by this episode or maybe learn something new, make sure to share this show with a friend or post about it in your stories.

Finally. Could you do one more favor for me today? Will you take a minute and hop on over to Apple Podcast and leave a kind and thoughtful review for the Well Tinder Live podcast. You see, this is how people find us, and every positive review helps to unlock the door for someone else to get in on the magic life.

Tending to thank you again for listening and being a part of this well-attended life community. And until next time, y'all blessings and blooms.