EP11: Amy's RightSize Reflection - The Energy Audit

Your calendar can look perfectly reasonable and still leave you wiped out by Friday. We dig into the real reason: a planner tracks time, but it does not measure emotional load, mental stress, or the subtle drain of always being “on.” When we start asking “Do I have the energy?” instead of only “Do I have the time?” the whole game changes, especially for anyone navigating midlife, recovery, or a season packed with invisible responsibilities. 

We walk through a simple, practical energy audit you can do with nothing more than a notebook and 15 minutes. Using three columns, we sort the last seven days into energy builders, energy drains, and necessary but neutral tasks. Builders are the activities that restore you and help prevent burnout, like quiet mornings, movement, reading, prayer, or meaningful connection. Drains include the sneaky stuff that looks responsible but costs you dearly: meetings that should have been emails, obligations you have outgrown, overcommitting, people-pleasing, and constant availability. 

We also share one boundary that consistently creates breathing room: a weekly “no plan night,” protected before anything else hits the schedule. It is simple, it is not glamorous, and it can reset your entire week by reminding you that rest is not something you earn after you finish everything. Listen through to the closing question, choose one thing to let go of this week, and then subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review so more people can find these conversations.

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Transcript

A Hard Week And A Boundary

SPEAKER_01 0:03

Hey, fearless friends. Well, the energy audit. Why you're exhausted even when your calendar looks fine. So I'm going to start with a story on today's right size reflection. And this is coming off a big weekend. I gotta be honest, I've had a little issue here with some kidney stones. And if any of you listeners have had those before, oh boy. And I've had three children. So I know pain. This is a different kind of pain. And I ended up having emergency surgery, which was not good. And I may or may not hold the world record for the largest stone in the Tri-County area. Yeah, that's something to maybe put in the record book. But most importantly, I have to tell you, my energy was drained. Um, after surgery, I uh had a little bit of a complication uh after they removed a stent, and uh it has been a road. So uh I have been, of course, at my summer happy place, and my summer happy place is where I really chase slow. If you've known me and followed me over the years, summer is usually chasing slow for me. I become an observer more than a leader, and I always try to do that in with in great intention. And because I know my summers are kind of a revolving door. I have kids that are coming and company that's coming. And this past weekend, I had our daughter's future son-in-law's parents. So the future in-laws here and staying in our home, and of course, the right-size life. You know, we're in a smaller space now, and managing all of that can become interesting. But we use all our space wisely, I'll have to say. Um, and anyway, I was coming off of this health hiccup feeling kind of tired, and of course, feeling a little bit like, wow, what is this all going to entail? Having visitors that I really don't know well in our home. And so Monday night came, and believe it or not, got through the weekend, and I'll have a whole separate podcast episode all about that, because I think there's a lot of value in it. But Sunday night came, and Monday is something I like to do in the summers called Pack the Patio Dance Party. It's the inaugural year of these, and um, we had our first one, and it was a great success. Women get together, we dance, literally, just have a dance party for an hour and a half. We connect, we maybe have a glass of wine or a mock tail, and we just have a good time and let loose. Women only, lots of fun. And on this particular Monday, following this health hiccup and lots of company was another dance party. And I sent it out in the group chat and said, Hey, really looking forward to this. And you know what? A little voice on the back of my back of my mind was saying, Amy, you're exhausted. Like, you don't need to do this. Like, there's that little person sitting on my shoulder that, with all of this that I preach to everybody every single day about chasing slow and doing time audits and all those things, I wasn't even applying it to my own life. And I was like, oh yeah, let's do it. Let's do it Monday night. Until I didn't want to do it. And quite honestly, a lot of the people couldn't make it for a variety of reasons. People are traveling, people have company. It's summer. We're busy, you know? Things are going on. And so I sent a note and said, with some boundaries, and said, listen, if only a couple people can make it, we're just gonna cancel this one and move it to August. So anyway, that's they're right there. That's the knowledge for my right size, right size reflection for today. I have to tell you, um, it never comes without that feeling of, ah, I could probably do it. But you know what? I had to step into my power and say a lot of people weren't able to make it. I was coming off a lot of just a lot of exhaustion, and we'll do it in August. And you know what? It was perfect. So that's what we're talking about today. The

Why The Calendar Misleads Us

SPEAKER_01 4:01

energy audit. You know, energy audit, it's a it's a big thing. Why are you exhausted even when your calendar looks fine? So let's dig in. Welcome to the Right Size Life, the podcast where we make space for what matters most. And if you've been with me through the Fearlessly Facing 50 years, welcome back. And if you're new here, I'm glad you found us. I'm Amy, the founder of Fearlessly Facing 50, a best-selling author, TEDx, all that stuff. And now I have a new book called coming out called Creating the Right Size Life. Because I believe the second half is about not about doing more, it's about making space for what matters the most. A few months ago, I opened my planner on a Sunday afternoon, and I looked over and um I looked ahead, honestly, and it didn't look that bad. Like I had coffee with a friend, my typical workouts, a couple of podcast interviews, church, a meeting, actually, two meetings, I think. Dinner with my husband that I did the no plan night, a phone call with one of my kids that I had scheduled some time with because I hadn't caught up with him in a long time. Nothing really overwhelming and nothing dramatic. Nothing that should have left me feeling completely depleted. But by Friday, I was exhausted. Not really physically, but emotionally, mentally, spiritually, to be quite honest. And I remember thinking something isn't adding up. Because on paper, it looked like a perfectly reasonable week. Um, but here's what I had forgotten. Your calendar doesn't measure energy, it only measures time. And time isn't the whole story. It definitely isn't the whole story. That is for sure. That week changed something for me. Because I realized I wasn't managing my time. I needed to start managing my energy. Those are two completely, completely different things. When we spend so much of our lives asking, do I have time? But maybe the better question is: do I have the energy? I think that's a really big question. Do I have the energy? Here's something I share in creating the right size life book. Time is fixed. Energy is renewable, but only if we protect it. So I did start doing something now that I call the energy audit.

The Three-Column Energy Audit

SPEAKER_01 7:12

I do a time audit, I do a people audit, I do an energy audit. Nothing fancy, just a blank sheet of paper with three columns on it. On one side, I write energy builders. These were the things that left me feeling more like myself. Walking by the water, maybe coffee with someone who really inspires me. Swimming, for sure, swimming. Quiet mornings, my biggest thing. I love a quiet morning and time with my husband. I also like reading. I put that as a priority this year, prayer, and recording this podcast. Then the second column is the energy drains. Now, energy drains aren't necessarily bad things, just things that consistently kind of leave me feeling heavy. Meetings that should have been emails, obligations that I had outgrown, saying yes because I didn't want to disappoint someone. Cha-ching, cha-ching, chuck, chuck, overcommitting, being constantly available, checking my phone too often. And the third column necessary but neutral. Laundry, groceries, paying my bills, things that simply really need to happen. Here's what surprised me. My week wasn't too full. It was simply too full of the wrong things. Has that happened to you? Because that happens to me. You know, there comes a point in life where you realize just because you always have done something doesn't mean you're supposed to keep doing it. It's kind of a mic drop, right? For years I thought being dependable meant saying yes. I thought being kind meant always being available. I thought being productive meant filling every open space on my calendar. But somewhere along the way, I confused being busy with living well. And maybe you've done that too. The

The Weekly No Plan Night

SPEAKER_01 9:29

no plan night. I've talked about it before, but it's one of the simplest things I've done. And honestly, one of the most life-giving is something I call the no plan night. Every single week, every single week, one evening gets blocked off before anything else. No dinners, no meetings, no errands, no quick favors, no laundry, pretending to be self-care. Just space. Sometimes my husband and I sit on the porch when he's in town. Sometimes we go for a walk. Sometimes we just carry out food, or sometimes I choose to read. And sometimes I literally do nothing. And here's the funny thing. That one evening changes the entire week. Because when we protect one night, we stop believing every hour has to be productive.

SPEAKER_00 10:33

So

Your 15-Minute Reset And Next Steps

SPEAKER_00 10:34

here's my invitation for you this week.

SPEAKER_01 10:38

Take 15 minutes. Grab a notebook. Write down everything that filled your last seven days. Then ask yourself, did this give me energy? Did it drain me? Or was it simply necessary? Don't judge it. Don't judge it. Just notice it. Because awareness is where change begins. And maybe, maybe just maybe you'll discover what what I did.

SPEAKER_00 11:11

You don't need a completely different life. You might just need a better fit. That's my right size reflection for this week.

SPEAKER_01 11:24

Before we go, I want to leave you with one question. What's one thing you can let go of this week? One thing you can let go of this week to make room for what matters most. Think about it. Pray about it. Write it down. And if this episode encouraged you, would you do me a favor? Share it with a friend who feels like they've been running on empty. And if you haven't already, be sure to follow the Right Size Life wherever you listen to podcasts. It helps more people discover these conversations. And I'd be so grateful if you'd leave a review. And if you'd like to be the first to hear about my upcoming book, Creating the Right Size Life, send me an email at Amy at Fearlessly Facing50 F-I-F-T-Y.com with the word list in the subject line. And I'll make sure you're among the first to know when it's released. Until next time, remember the right size life isn't about having less. It's about having more room for what matters the most.

SPEAKER_00 12:38

I'll see you next week.