Circle of Friends

 Sometimes outgrowing your circle is not about believing you are better than anyone else. It's about becoming the person you have been called to be. Real friends don't demand that you stay the same. They cheer when you become better. 

Transcript

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And welcome to Perspectives with Wendy Mead. I am your host, Wendy Mean. I want to thank you for tuning in. It is my hope that there is a takeaway in each episode of Perspectives, but the only way to find out is to click one episode at a time. Now, today I want to talk about your circle of friends. Circle of friends. Now, let me start by asking, does your circle of friends feel uncomfortable if things seem to start to change? Now, if that is the case, I would refer to them as your comfort circle of friends. You see, when you start to grow, a comfort circle of friends may intentionally encourage you to remain where you are. You see, when I hear that, it sort of reminds me of a friend whom I've known for several years. This friend had a very small circle of friends. It only consisted of three people. They were two brothers and a friend. They lived next door to each other and of course attended the same schools up to graduation. They hung out together, played sports together, and even went on dates together. They were there for each other in any capacity needed. The three of them were welcomed by their families, and they were treated as family and invited to every event that occurred. Now, the three of them got into trouble together as well as child during childhood, all the way up into adulthood, and they would also indulge in, you know, the things that boys sometimes do, that a little bit of alcohol and boys' night out, and they kind of indulged a little heavily in what they call um marijuana weed, you know, some say. Now, one of the brothers did get into a situation that led to incarceration for a couple of years, but nonetheless, they were still there for him through visitation and of course money on his commissary. Now, once he was released, they were back together again through whatever came their way. It was clear the bond was locked in and they were inseparable. Now, one day, the infamous three, they met at their usual location for drinks, or as one of them may say, a little bit of bat juice maybe. They also would partake in a little bit of weed and they indulged in that as well. But the three of them kind of started to reminisce about life, you know, whereas one started to talk about wanting more for himself than the other. You know, just the same old routine. He kind of wanted to break that up. He went on to say that he was interested in learning more about religion, the Bible, and just simply being a better person overall. And this also included giving up alcohol and giving up weed. Now, the other two responded, whoa, where did that come from? So they were a bit taken back, and and and the guy he just kind of simply said, Hey, uh I'm just saying, you know, I think I want to get into the ministry. Well, this didn't go over very well. But as time went on, they, you know, they continued to do their thing, and and the the guy decided he wanted to go to ministry school, and he obtained um a pastor position at a prominent church. So he then, you know, went ahead and kind of did what he explained to them. He put aside alcohol and he stopped smoking weed and and he he was true to to his plans, his goals that he had set for himself. So, but you see, when this happens, that means that your priorities have shifted and you are more focused on your health, career, family, finances, and your personal growth versus let's go get a buzz. Now, when his circle of friends from childhood, mind you, found out about his success and that he no longer indulged indulged in alcohol and weed, they actually discontinued communication and acted as if they were never acquainted. You see, growth tends to rub people the wrong way, and they tend to not want to see you succeed or meet your goals. But the most interesting part that I find is they could be diligently working towards reaching their goals, but still do not want to see you achieve. Now, people will accuse you of acting funny before they will accept the fact that you're becoming the person you want to be. But you can't help but just wonder why it is that difficult for people to understand the importance of growth. You see, understand your circle will either celebrate your growth or they'll resist your growth. But healthy friendships, they don't require you to become someone else just to belong in a circle of friends. So I I advise others ask yourself if you have a circle of friends that does not allow you to change and become the person you have set out for yourself, you have to ask yourself, does your circle of friends encourage the best version of you or the easiest version of you? If you changed one habit today, would your circle support you or would they challenge you? Think about that. Are you choosing your friends? Or are your ch friends choosing your future? Something else to think about. You see, sometimes outgrowing your circle isn't about believing you're better than anyone else, it's about becoming the person you've been selected to be. You see what I'm saying? Real friends don't require you to stay the same, they genuinely cheer for you when you become better. Now, not everyone in your circle is a sign to your future. Some people are meant for a season, while others they're meant for the journey. So I want to challenge you. I want to challenge you to count your influences. Ask yourself who challenges me to grow? Who encourages my purpose? And who keeps pulling me back to a version of myself I've already outgrown. This is how we do it on prospectives. It is what it is, it is done. Until next time, you can see that.