She Asked Him To Tell Her About His Sexual Past, Now She Is Turned On...But Also Jealous

This week, Nicky and the girls head to Chattanooga and we have two listener questions to discuss.

First up, a woman wanted to know about her partner's sexual past. She found out all the spicy details and it turned her on AND made her jealous.

Next, a man wrote to say that his wife will not accept his apology. This leads into a discussion as to what makes a good apology.

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Tim McGinnis
Nicky McGinnis

Transcript

 Well, I interpret it as perhaps his apology sucks. 

Welcome to the Besties in Bed podcast with Tim and Nicky, a married couple chatting about their adventures in life and marriage. Please be advised that our bed is not always work or kid friendly, but we'll leave that decision up to you.

Welcome to the Besties in Bed. I'm Tim. And I'm Nicky. Lorne, I don't know if we can get this right. Well, we're, we're, we're like two seconds into it and we're already fucking up. So let's just move along, moving along to the other fuck up. So you just got in from Chattanooga. Y'all had a girl's trip to Chattanooga.

You had you, our two daughters, a friend of yours, and then her two daughters. So it was six of y'all going together and what y'all did at the beginning, describe what y'all did at the beginning with the. Phone cases. Oh, oh, I thought you were gonna say like sweater ass is off walking a trail. No. Um, okay So one of the girls found on tik tok that they had done a cell phone swap casing and it was like a surprise So each of us exchanged cell phones, but we did it as in like cell phone cases cases yes, not the cell phones, but the cases and we did it as Whoever the roommates were so like me and the other mom did and then the two older girls and the two Younger girls, which you know, we're all 18 and above so it wasn't like, you know, like kiddie kids But you know, so anyways, so we each had to buy our roomie a phone case That was aka annoying big bulky Disgusting obnoxious whatever we could come up with so disgusting What'd I say?

Disgusting. Disgusting. It is disgusting. So throw it in the dictionary. So you got an avocado. I got like a avocado, but it was like a, what do you call crossbody? And then there was an avocado pouch on the back of mine where I could unzip it and zip it. So I put my apple wallet in that and my money. And Amber got A rose, a huge rose.

Huge rose. Autumn got a hatchet. So she was walking around Chattanooga carrying a hatchet thing that looked like a meat, it was a meat cleaver. Yes, not a hatchet. It was a meat cleaver. Yeah, so she's like got it in her pocket. We were at the aquarium and like one of the moms comes up and says, Is that real?

Cause my daughter's like looking at it and she's like, No, it's a fake. So she showed it to them and they were like, Oh my gosh, that's so funny. But yeah, no, she hated it. And then y'all got four. The other ones, the one mom got this one, I gave her the, it was like red with like rhinestones and stuff. It looked like a, supposed to be like a perfume bottle.

And then it had this red ball thing hanging and it had a chain for like a crossbody. It looked like a stripper phone or something. It was very, um, bougie and. Obnoxiously. So you've you've seen strippers carry phones like that. I don't know but it was real. No, you haven't. No, I mean, I don't know No, you haven't you've never I've never seen a stripper's phone, but i'm sure you're gonna say you've never seen a stripper and i'm calling bullshit on that No, i've never seen their phone.

So but i'm sure they don't have them looking that obnoxious, but no, they probably look like phones Like normal phone cases. Yes. Yeah, this was obnoxiously. I had like a puff ball. That was red. It looked like an old fashioned Perfume container with the, uh, the bottle with the little dangly air poofer. like a diffuser, like a poofer.

You squeeze it and the perfume shoots out. I had no idea. It was just god awful. And then Autumn got the, um, the masked gangster dude. Oh, it was a gangster thing that said Thug Life on it. It had like a cross on its forehead or something. Like tattoos. Yes. And it was... Horrible. Absolutely horrible. And it had a stylist with it and with an ink pen and like a little stylist.

I thought you meant like, you know, somebody coming around doing hair. No, not that kind. That would have been nice. But then it had like a little. Lanyard thing with it, so she had to carry that around and then the other one got this cute little monster looking thing And it was pink with arms and legs. It had this big smile on it and stuff It was it was obnoxious because it could barely fit in the pocket or anything like that It's little legs are sticking out and his arms were like all over So, yeah, they were real annoying, but everybody, none of them fit in pockets.

No, nothing. Except the hatch, the meat cleaver, apparently. It did fit in a pocket. And then just the, then the handle stuck out of the pocket. And it looked like literally like you could just grab it out of your back pocket and be like, and get somebody. Yeah. So anyway, good trip. It was a good trip. So we have a couple of listener questions.

Oh, do we now? We do. All right. Let's, what do we have? This one's from a girl. A girl. Are you sure it's a girl? My boyfriend... My boyfriend has been with many others before me, okay? Alright. I asked him to tell me about his past experiences in details, and he did. Now, he told her. Be careful what you ask for.

She writes, I was incredibly turned on listening to it, but now I also feel insecure. Well, is that all the details? Yeah, I mean, it was just a DM. I need some more details on the things that we're turning on. No, I'm just kidding. Okay, so the boyfriend had a lot of girlfriends, or at least a lot of people.

sexual partners in the past. And she felt like she wanted to know about them. So she asked. She received what she asked for. She got the stories. Yeah, like I said, be careful what you ask for. Apparently they were hot stories. But now she's like, well, I guess she's insecure. Meaning that. She doesn't like probably feel that she can do the same for her boyfriend as these others did.

But he's not with them for a reason. Right. He's not with them for a reason, but she's, I think she's just leaning more towards the sexual experience that he has versus the inexperience. But you don't want to give him the same thing that he's gotten from somebody else. You want to be your own. Well, I mean, she's turned on by it.

She may want to give him the same thing. Well, I'm saying, um, if you're insecure, you're insecure, obviously, because of something that the other person is doing, whatever act it was or whatever. So you want You don't want to do the same thing like, oh, he was like, oh, she was giving me a blowjob and she was like up and down and like around and then she did the tip this way.

Well, yeah, okay, that's great and wonderful, but you don't want to do the same thing for that to come and play in his mind. You want to do your own rendition? Well, maybe she doesn't think she... Does that make sense? Yeah. Okay. Maybe she thinks she's boring compared to... Well, then spice it up, bitch. Well, I guess that's it.

It's, this might be an opportunity for her. To have a conversation with him and say, Hey, you know, tell him what in that past, what parts turned her on and that she might want to try something like that. Right. Well, and she also needs to ask him like, well, were any of these parts something that was something that you might be missing now?

Are these any parts that you want to continue in a relationship? He might be like, Oh, I didn't like when she did that. But, you know, he's explained it to her, but. That doesn't necessarily mean he likes that. He might be like, Oh, no, no, no, what you do is better. But he's not describing what she does. So she doesn't even know if what she does is better or not better.

He might like what she does better. He might not. But you, that's when you have to have that open conversation. It's all about communication. Communication, yeah. I mean, I, I guess I'd really want to know what parts turned her on. Yeah, I agree with you. You just go straight into that. What parts turned her on?

Well, I don't know. Um, if you're listening, can you like send him details, please? Lots and lots of details. Oh my gosh. Hey, I'll share them. Unless you don't want me to. Yes. All right. You said there's another question? We have another question. Okay. All right, this one could be Interesting. Okay. This is from a guy a married guy.

Okay. Okay. I'm ready Apparently he's fucked up and something. Yeah dump his ass. Well, I'm just he goes I I've I've apologized to my wife for something I did not a big something by the way, but she does not accept my apology That's it. Yeah, so I guess he's well, it was more of a statement. So let's turn it into a question Okay, well, it depends on the fuck up, but I mean, he said it wasn't anything did well, you know what the fact that he added nothing big, by the way, might say something about his apology.

Well, yeah, and then he didn't give any details about what the not big deal was because depends on what it is. Is this an ongoing thing that's constant and she's just freaking fed up with it. And then, I mean, there is so much interpretation. I could go with this one, like. Well, I interpret it as perhaps his apology sucks.

Yeah, well, that could be too. It might be one of those, I'm sorry, but. You never do an I'm sorry, but. I'm notorious for those though. You are, you suck at apologies, by the way. I do. Hey, at least I can admit to it. I'm sorry, but your eyeballs. Well, that wasn't loud at all. So, okay, perhaps. Perhaps his apology sucks ass.

So what makes a good apology? Let's turn it into that. Oh, well, you have to be sincere first off and be like, you know, I'm sorry and you have to state what you're sorry for. Not, oh, I'm just sorry. I'm sorry. You know, you need to be like, I'm sorry that... So admit the issue. Yes, you have to literally fess up to what you messed up with.

Not whatever and you don't blame it on them. Like, no, I'm sorry. And then they throw that butt in there Yeah, do a butt. So admit the issue do not include butt That's really. not not a butt and an apology. No, no, no butts and apologies butts everywhere else I mean, that's really your basic thing is you have to admit to it You have to be sincere and you don't follow up with a butt You just leave it at that, you know, so I'm sorry.

I heard no excuses. Yeah, I shouldn't have said that that was totally out of line I'm, really sorry. I hope you can forgive me Boom end of the story like all right. I hope you forgive me. That's uh, you didn't mention that earlier So we have no we have a admit the issue. No excuses. Don't include the but and then ask for forgiveness Yes, and then pray that you get it depending on what you did pray that you get it get all that too But pray that you get the apology and then you get it at the end Make up sex.

No, you just you you know, do you can't but you can't keep repeating the same crap either Oh, and here's another thing that peoples tend to do, is they Peoples. Peoples. Did you really say peoples? No, I meant to say like, people. People. People is the plural of person. Yeah, but no Peoples. I didn't say peoples.

I'm just saying You said peoples. We have it recorded, baby. Well, rewind and see. But I'm saying that people start, and it was like Okay. Now I don't even, now I don't even remember what I was going to say. People. That's all I remember. Oh, what I was going to say is that people bring up things from the past that they've already, aka supposedly apologized for kind of thing, like, or like accepted an apology for.

So like, let's say for example, you Left your dirty towel on the floor and I have complained and complained which he does not do this So this is why I did that. I'm probably the one that would be more notorious for doing that. He just leaves shoes everywhere I'm sorry so You leave a towel on the floor and I'm like complete constantly complain, you know, and you're like, I'm so sorry I'll never do it again.

Oh, yeah, right But, and you don't, you don't ever do it again. Let's say you never, ever do it again. And then we're in an argument about leaving a fork in the sink. What again? He never does that. No, I do that, but I rinse it off. She has caked up shit all over the, see how I'm pulling out all my flaws. But then you can't be like, you leave the fork here and now you always leave the towel on the floor.

You don't know that you're bringing up like past issues. Like we've already covered that and left. I'm literally picking out like. Plain Jane, basic stuff. No, but I'm saying like big, big issues. You don't, after it's been said, done, argued, you're over it, let's move along. You've moved along, you can't bring it back up.

All right, if you've forgiven, truly forgive. You're right. I can't. Don't keep throwing it back in your partner's face. I cannot stand that. That drives me bonkers. Batshit crazy. Batshit crazy. Sweetie, you are batshit crazy. And it drives me batshit crazy. I don't think either of us do that. No. But I hear it for others and I'm like, really?

No. Right. Either accept the apology or don't, but go on with life. Yeah. Anyway, okay, that was my rant. That is, really, that's all I have right now. That's it. Yeah. Just a couple questions. Wow. But we can do our interview cards. We blew that out. Do you have a favorite coffee mug? If so, what is, what's on it and what makes it your favorite?

Wah? My favorite coffee mug is the one that's clean and readily available in the morning. I do not have a favorite that has a certain saying. I know, and that's why I was like, I mean, I have one that has. I have one that has like a cork bottom. That's kind of cool. Um, I have, uh, Yeah, I mean I have a lot of, I have a lot of good ones, but I wouldn't say one that's like my go to favorite.

See, and my favorites don't even have sayings on them. I have that white one and that aqua blue one. Those are like my favorite. Okay. Well, you'll have to give that aqua and that white one. Okay, you know which one, so I'm out. They don't. What you do, that's all the matter, because when he fixes my coffee, it'll be on that one.

What is one thing that you wish you'd spent more time doing when you were younger? Saving money.

Okay. I mean, seriously, if I had saved more money when I was younger and wasn't so, I don't know, bought stupid stuff, then. But that's part of learning to value money is to buy stupid shit and pissing it away, right? Yeah, I guess. If I had spent more time doing it, I'm sure. Really, she's reading the card here like I misread it here.

No, no, no. I'm not reading it like you misread it. I'm just trying to think of something else, maybe. But, I mean, that was just my first thing was like, Save that money! Don't spend it on stupid stuff. Um, I don't know, maybe... What is something stupid that you spent money on when you were younger? Like a kid.

Toys that you just didn't need. Beanie Babies was a big one. Oh my gosh. We were all gonna put our kids through college with Beanie Babies. I mean, you know, and we wound up, so we had a We had tubs full of these Beanie Babies and we wound up selling them at a yard sale for like a dollar each. Yeah, Winnie the Pooh stuff, like just knickknacks and all that kind of stupid stuff that I used to always have.

Like I'm, I used to be a hoarder and a collector of things and now I'm not. As much at all like I'm like, oh just get rid of it. Just get rid of it. Just get rid of it Yeah, like I tend to throw things away. I mean I go through those like moments where i'm like, oh no I want to save that i'm like, oh screw it throw it away.

I mean like it's just stuff, you know The thing that comes to mind for me Was my when I graduated high school, you know people give you money and I took A lot of it and bought a car stereo, an Alpine car stereo, which Alpine was a huge brand. I guess it was, it just felt cool to have an Alpine stereo. And I spent more money on that than I should have.

It's probably, my car probably wasn't even worth that much. That's so funny. Um, I wish I had that money back. I know, because that radio is nothing. No, it had a cassette deck. Oh my goodness. That's terrible. Anyway, do you have anything else? No, I guess that's it. That is it. Short, sweet, and to the point. Short episode today.

Sweet episode. Sweet and short. See you guys next time. Thank you for joining us. You can visit us at bestiesinbed. com for all of our links and episodes. Please subscribe or follow so that you never miss out on an episode. In addition, we would also really appreciate it if you would share us with a friend.

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