Cassandra Thompson - The Good, Bad and Ugly of Networking

Cassandra is back! Fan favorite and returning guest Cass and Jason dig into the topic of networking.

Tune in to hear some networking horror stories, actionable ways to make networking more systematic and fun and more.

Cassandra Thompson is a globally recognized speaker whose work casting contestants for Wheel of Fortune, strategizing on the recruitment team at Riot Games, and coaching ambitious professionals made her into a networking paragon.

Through her talks, Cassandra helps audience members reach their career goals by leveraging the power of networking. She not only has a wonderful way of demystifying the topic but she also makes it humorous and entertaining. Her insights have reached over 9 million people on YouTube and have been featured on high-performing podcasts as well as ABC7, CNBC, and other major media outlets. Whether it's through Cassandra’s keynotes, workshops, training, or coaching you always walk away motivated and equipped with actionable steps to implement immediately.

Cassandra is on a mission to get people back to building authentic, real relationships.

cassthompson.com
https://www.linkedin.com/in/cassthompson/
https://www.youtube.com/c/CassThompsonCareerAdvice

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Transcript

Jason Frazell 0:11

Hey everybody, we are back with a fan favorite. It was about a year ago, I was looking at my schedule, it was about a year ago, I had Cassandra on Cassandra Thompson is back with us for some more entertainment, some more fun, some more brilliance around networking. Her and I were catching up. We're gonna share some potential horror stories. Not horror, it's not a horrible story, it's not a horror story, but certainly uncomfortable stories from the field of networking and staying connected with the people. And we are gonna talk about how to do those things. Without it feeling icky or gross, which a lot of people say to both of us, I want to stay connected to people. In other words, how do you utilize your network and make asks without feeling like, oh my gosh, I haven't talked to you and suddenly I need something from you. So Cassandra welcome back. So good to have you back on. Thank you. Good to be back. All right, remind the audience for those who haven't listened last year, where are you coming in to us from today?

Cassandra Thompson 1:12

I am in Phoenix, Arizona,

Jason Frazell 1:14

Phoenix, Arizona, Phoenix, Arizona.

Cassandra Thompson 1:18

It's 102.

Jason Frazell 1:20

That is disgusting. There's a reason I don't live in that area. I couldn't do it. It's we're not going to talk about the weather, but speaking of networking, so let's talk about the weather to start. How's the weather in Phoenix? I'm kidding. So I know, right? Yeah. Yeah. So I've got

Cassandra Thompson 1:34

to know. People do normally ask when you live somewhere like Phoenix. They ask. Yeah. Well,

Jason Frazell 1:38

I'm from Minnesota, so people love to talk about the weather in Minnesota. Cause it's a thing. Oh, how cold is it? How much did you go skiing and go snowmobiling, which is, you know, it's an easy way to connect and also a little yawn, yawn. So Cassandra, last time you were on, we kind of, we got to know you got to know what you're up to. You do a whole bunch of different things. You used to work on wheel of fortune, which is pretty awesome. Been in the news recently. You've you're a, you're a video marketer. You're a brand strategist. You're a career expert. You're a networking expert and you're a. Awesome speaker today. We're going to really hone in on your expertise around networking. And I know Cassandra, that is something that you are passionate about and something that is spoken a lot about out there, but it doesn't seem like there's a lot of good information. At least that's my opinion on it. There are books, there are books. but it, it doesn't feel, it feels gross or it feels inauthentic. So Cassandra, let's first talk about what has you passionate about the topic of networking and let's define that for the audience. Like, what do we mean when we say we're going to do some networking? We're going to be connected to people. What do we mean by that?

Cassandra Thompson 2:46

Yeah, so to me, networking should be professional relationship building, which if you're building any sort of relationship, it shouldn't feel icky. And I think networking often feels icky or gross or like a user because you're not being authentic and natural. about it. And if you would have some patience and treat it like other relationships in your life, it would be a lot easier to do and not feel gross. Yeah.

Jason Frazell 3:22

So it's something that I would say that you don't really get taught how to do generally. It's not something you go to college or high school, like, Hey, we're going to teach on a network. It's just something that. At some point in your, I'm just looking at my life at some point, you realize there's some value in it. Maybe some people don't put a lot of value in it. When what's the question I want to ask, is this something that you've always been passionate about? Have you always found this been a natural place for you where you like to connect with people? And one of the things that I know, yeah, so I, so Cassandra's going, no, no, no, no, I hate it. And one, I'll just add one thing here. I relate to networking as it's professional, but sometimes it's, you do it without expecting anything from the other person in return, because you may, they may not have anything for you in that, in that time period. So it's almost like a chapter. So you shook your head, sincere no. When I said, is this something you've always been comfortable with? Let's talk about that. So what's going on there?

Cassandra Thompson 4:20

Have I always been comfortable meeting new people and getting to know them? Yes. Did I think of that as networking? No. And so, the idea of networking, like, I think while people aren't taught how to network in college, and I have heard some people weren't even taught, like, the phrase, you should network, I think a lot of people were taught in college, oh, you should network, you should network, but they were never taught what that means, or they were taught really in Correctly of like, reach out to alumni and ask them if they have any openings and like, give your quick I've I've watched call. I used to work at a college. I've watched college students be trained incorrectly on quote unquote, elevator pitches. Where they talk about themselves for 30 seconds, and then I've seen a professor take that student and push them to a recruiter and say, go practice your elevator pitch on them, and I've watched that student, like, break out into a flop sweat to do it, and I'm like, right, because that's not how you should, because that's not natural, because that's not how you would have a conversation, so that's why I say, like, no, it's not something I've been good at, it's something that I've I've seen all the information out there and always been like, why does this make us all so uncomfortable? And how do you change it? And so I've learned that over time that now networking is fun to me. But it came from a place of, I don't like different steps of it, of how do you build it naturally? And then even how do you walk up to people at an event? What do you say at a small, you know, at a conversation, you know, but I don't want to get on the rabbit trail of. Events do not equal networking. Networking is relationship building, so like you said, there's chapters, it's over time. Events are a starting point to get a relationship going. So, that's a piece of it, but it's not the whole thing. I just know a lot of people, the second, that's the other thing, is the second you say networking, and I accidentally said the word event, people go, Oh, I don't want to go to conferences and mixers and all that, you know? So, it's not that all the time.

Jason Frazell 6:31

Yeah. So how do you, so for you then, how do you define networking as it relates to your life as somebody who's done a lot of it and had a lot of success with it and your career? Like if I said, Hey, how's it been going with doing your networking or connecting with people? How do you define it for yourself?

Cassandra Thompson 6:48

For me, it's just right now meeting, like I moved three years ago in the middle of COVID. I feel like I'm still trying to meet people in my area. And so it's just trying to meet as many people as possible and then figure out how to keep. In touch with each of them. And at what rate or depth do I want to keep in touch with each of

Jason Frazell 7:10

them? Yeah. And I think what I'd like to do a little bit later in the episode is actually talk about some tactical how tos. I know that's something that I struggle with too. And I'm in, you know, I think you and I are similar personality. We generally like most people. We like meeting with people. We like talking to people without expecting anything in return. But even me, sometimes I go, well, how do I systemize this in a way? It's meaningful. But before we do that, I think it'd be fun if each of us maybe shared a couple of stories about, stories are more powerful than telling people how to do it, of maybe the ways not to network. So I have a couple of, I have a couple of in mind for me. We'll just start with you. Any example come up for you, new recent. It doesn't really matter when, but left a bad impression on you.

Cassandra Thompson 7:58

Yeah, I have two. One, I don't think I shared this with your, maybe I shared it with you last week, but this is my class. Like one now is on my birthday this year. I received a Facebook message from a person who used to be someone I was close to 10 years, not in, in same circles as when I lived in Los Angeles. 15 years ago. I haven't talked to him. He and his family have moved states. I opened a Facebook message that said, happy birthday. I don't know if you heard, but I'm now a financial planner. And then it literally was like, Hey, happy birthday, but enough about you. Let's talk about me. I'm a financial planner. This is what I can do if you ever need a free consultation. And it's like. Oh, and this is my thing, no shade on that person, going to what we said before, I think he was taught incorrectly how to network. And so I think he, he probably hated writing that email, but was trained by somebody. at his new company. This is how you reach out to people and get clients. It's like, no, it's not. That's why it feels gross. We can talk in a little bit. I want to hear your story first, but we can talk a little bit of, he could have made one simple tweak to make that not be gross. But I want to hear what's, what's one of yours.

Jason Frazell 9:24

I'm laughing because mine is also in the same industry and no shade. This is. We could come up with these for anyone, but it was a, so it was somebody I did not know. And I met at a in person networking event in New York city. And he said, Hey, I'd love to connect. Great. No problem. So we did a, we did a phone call and I'll never forget this. And he, he was younger and I think he was also trained. Similarly, we get on and you can tell he's like, oh, so tell me about what you do, but you can tell. There's no interest in what I actually do. Like there's no actual like he's not interested in referring. It's none of that. It's like the nicety. He goes, Oh, can I tell you about what I do? And then he goes on for, and I timed this about 30 minutes, about 30 minutes. And he tells me all about who he works for and why they're the best company to do this. And talks to me like I don't understand finance finances or understand things like 401ks or life insurance. In other words, Cass, he doesn't ask me any questions. And at the end, I said to him, I said, Hey, thanks so much. And I was really patient. I said, thanks so much. I go, would you be open to some feedback? And he goes, and he goes, he goes, yeah, of course. You know, and I said, I know you're just starting out and I appreciate the pitch. I may ask you in the future to ask people two questions. First question is one. Do you have a financial planner? If the answer is yes, the next question should be, are you happy with your financial planner? If you would have asked me those two questions in the first 30 seconds. You could have avoided the entire 30 minutes. And I said, and it's fine. I get it. You're practicing. He's like, Oh yeah. But just like where any goes back to the sales pitch. And I'm just like, and there's nothing wrong with him as a person. I, I totally get, he's just doing what he's supposed to be doing. But to me, that's an example. That's not even networking. That's just pitching somebody. And so that was, that was my first example. I'd like to hear, and now I've got one. That's not Not that industry and that industry has lots of wonderful people. Our person is amazing. This is not a knock on that industry at all. I'm sure you have tons of people as well, but what's, and you said you have two, I have two as well. What's your second one? What's the, what's a big no, no.

Cassandra Thompson 11:51

So the other one is, okay, it's still kind of in the, it was just too quick of an ask. So met somebody virtually, like this person and I are put in the same small group for a business thing here in town. And after our first virtual call with the group, they reached out and said, Hey, I'd love to do a zoom chat and get to know you better. Like, great, cool. They beat me to it. I normally do that. Great. So we get on the zoom and I understand that this, this isn't how I normally do. This but I'm starting to see that this is normal for like when business people meet other service providers meet other service providers. It's very quick into the like, now what do you do now what do you need help with like what what kind of people are you looking for? Who can I refer to you? And I'm, even though I think like you should get to know them better first, I'm okay with When it's service provider to service provider being like, Hey, tell me what kind of referrals you need in case I know of somebody great. Like let's do that. That's a fine thing to me to talk about on a first call. It shouldn't be the first words out of your mouth, but I'm okay with it being on a first call. But then, this person too, talked about their business first the whole time. Remember, they initiated the meeting, and then I, I had to do all the work at the meeting. Tell me about yourself, so tell me about your business, and they just kind of sat there. And and they were typing on a computer, but it didn't seem like they were typing notes. I'm like, what are you doing? So it just wasn't giving you a great impression already. And then they're like, well, tell me about what you do. Tell me what's going on with you. And, how do you, I think they said. How do you market your business? Something like that. And so I started to say, I was about to answer them and they went, do you have an email list? And it was like such a weird question that I went, that I just ignored it. I kind of, I like address them. I didn't want to be rude. I went, yeah, I have an email list, but the main way that I really market is through LinkedIn and YouTube and speaking, that's what I'm really focused on. She goes, oh, well, the reason I'm asking if you have an email list is because I have a webinar coming up and I was wondering if you would, maybe put mention of it in your email list and or in your next newsletter and hasn't told me first off. This is wrong already. Like this is

Jason Frazell 14:18

so wrong. This

Cassandra Thompson 14:19

is so wrong. Like you should that is a giant ask. That is not a favor. No, that is a giant ask. But On top of it being a giant ask, didn't tell me what her webinar is about. So like, she's not even a good salesperson. I had to say like, well, what is the webinar? What's it about? Like didn't tell me what it's about. Didn't know who my audience was for anything. And similar to what you had to do with that guy, I came back around to it. I'm like, I just. I need to let you, you need to understand some things about email lists. Like, this is the, I said, how many people are on your list? I went, this is how many people are on my list. Yeah. And it costs money. I think this is what people don't know is it costs money to send emails for your business to your list. So you're asking me to spend money on your behalf, with no affiliate link, with anything. But even then, even if she had said, let's say she did it right. She said, well, I have a webinar coming up to this group of people on this day, and I would be willing to give you 50 percent as a JV partnership. Here's the link, yada, yada. I'd still be like, Why did you do this to me on our first call like it's not appropriate on a first call No, so that was my second one. Yeah, well way too fast and ask

Jason Frazell 15:45

way too fast can ask Yeah, and then the dating content you're like we're moving way too fast here person This is you've taken the leap between we had a cup of coffee to something much more serious way too quickly Mine is different. So this one is different I was, and I'll never forget this one. It's when I was first starting out as, as a service provider working for myself, I was in an in person networking event and it was one of those speed networking events, which I don't have any problem with. I think that can be an interesting format. We sit down, it's another, another person goes, Hey, so by the way, the worst opening line in the history of networking is, so tell me what you do. Not only are you not asking, you're like demanding that somebody tell you. And when I hear that it's almost an immediate no. And I just tune out. So Cass, tell me what you do. Like, you don't need to command me to do something. Don't even ask. So it was that, it was that pitch. I told him you could tell he was immediately disinterested. And so he's asking me something about it. And I start to tell him that I have a client that I'm working with who's in the job market. He goes on a rant for 10 minutes. About what my client needs to do, how I need to work with this client. Like if, if this person, and here's the irony of this story at the end of all this, at the end of all this guy, I finally get a chance. So tell me, like, would you be willing to tell me what you do? He goes, well, I'm, I'm looking for a job. I'm like, I'm like, wait, what? No, but he was such a know it all and. You probably ran into people like they know better about how to run your business than you, or they know like, Oh, you're doing this, you're doing that. And again, it was just an immediate turnoff. Never in a million years would I refer to that person for anything. I don't, I don't, I don't even remember what he does. And it's just like a complete lack of connection. So I think it's almost like dating, which I've been out of that game for a long time, but it's almost like. Hey, like let's agree this isn't a good fit and that's fine. We can both be awesome people, but yes, we don't need to continue to pursue this thing. If this is just a bad fit, but also the idea of like, oh, who can I refer to you? Who refers somebody to somebody else after like 10 minutes of talking? Like I don't do that.

Cassandra Thompson 17:58

Right, right. I think so. That's where I'll give that person the benefit of the doubt of I think since we're in the same smaller group together, they thought it was appropriate. I think they came out of maybe some of those networking models that are highly that way. This group we're in is not. But I think, but your story, like, so here's the thing. I kind of, I'll, I'll be honest about my, my shortcomings here. I kind of get that guy. I have a feeling, because this is where I think a lot of networking mistakes are made, is we have the best of intentions, but we don't understand how it comes across. And so that guy might, the guy who's sitting there being like, they should do this, and they should do that, and you should do this for them. He might be thinking like, I'm trying to show that I connect, and that I understand what you're doing, etc. And it's like, That's not the point because I've done that it's like I'm excited what you're talking about and I'll go into it and realize Oh, I didn't ask you first. Like, hey, do you want some feedback or hey, would you ask some questions to see where you're at with this person and what the person needs because I'm just excited about it. And so that I think kind of goes to, we all have communication things we have to work like we all have communication shortcomings that we have to work on and realize. Oh, what are our intentions may be really good, but it's not going to come off right. And so like I, I totally get that guy that I have had to stop myself now and things to go, okay, don't start talking about all the things, you know, on the thing, the person told you, ask them another question, see where they're at with it. Like they might not want to spend the next 20 minutes talking about it the way you want to talk about it. So it's, it's hard. It's, it's having to be really mindful at times, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't.

Jason Frazell 19:58

No, no, it, it doesn't. It's the, I mean, it's the old Maya Angelou quote, right? It's like to be memorable. It's not about, you know, telling people what you do or, or what you did for them. It's actually just how you made them feel. And I've, I've had that experience on both sides. I've had people reach back out to me and I I'm sure you had, have had two where they're like, Hey, we had a conversation two years ago and I just remembered it was a great lunch club meeting and you came to mind for me. And I actually have gotten a new client from that. I've also been on the receiving end, where I'm like, I'm like, they'll reach out or I'll be like, hey. You know, I don't remember that person well, but I remember I had a really nice conversation. I remember it was enjoyable and I reach out and it turns out to be like a new friendship or something. I'm sure you've had the same thing, but it's not because I'm like, well, they're the expert on financial models or marketing or any of those things. It's always about why I remember an emotional experience with them that, that was positive for me.

Cassandra Thompson 20:49

And that's, I think there was something else you said, well, with, I think there was something you said with that, that I think is really important. Transcribed Oh, like the breakup thing. Like this isn't a fit. I think that's something else that people need to give themselves permission on with networking. And this is why I said earlier, like, it's figuring out the depth I want to go to with people is you choose how you build that relationship and how deep you take it. And so every person you have a Zoom meeting with, or a coffee with, or a conversation at a networking event, does not have to turn into. a deep relationship To even become a client or to become like first off. Yeah, there's a couple things there Like one you don't know what relationship will turn into your best client or your best referral partner Or the person who offers you a job. You never know that. You think you do you don't but that's why it should be authentic relationship building like any other type of relationship in your life that If you go to a birthday party and you meet 10 new people You probably really hit it off with one. And you had three conversations where you go, I hope they're not at the next party. And you have a bunch in the middle that you go, that was a nice conversation. And it's like, it's the same at an event or something. There are going to be certain people that you're going to hit it off with. And you guys are now going to have lunch every other month. And there are other people that are going to get a holiday card. And that's okay. Like, they, all relationships don't have to be the same.

Jason Frazell 22:23

Yeah. I forget what the, I forget the name of the psychologist, but it's the, like the rule of 150 that is people. And I think this happens in just like the animal kingdom overall, over a certain amount of people in your sphere, you just like, you just can't handle that much in terms of keeping relationships going. I think it. I think that I forget his name. I could put a link to it in the chat is the number is about 150 that you can have across all of your networking, or maybe you've heard of this study before. And it was pretty famous. And that, and, and then you have your, also you have your, excuse me, you have your inner circle, you have your secondary, and you have your third. That kind of leads me to what I want to talk about next, which is your experience with networking, and as we're talking about business networking here, generating business, you know, selling your services, or finding a service provider, like you and I have both done on both sides of that fence, talking about where the majority of those relationships come from. And I'll share for me. The vast majority of the success I've had in my business is from third degree relationships. People that I know who then know me, and then from that, they go, well, they don't actually know me that well, but they refer, hey, you should talk to this guy, Jason. And then it ends up being something for me. What's been your experience with that? And I, before we answer that, I thought that when I started my own business, that it would be the people who know me, love me, trust me the most, or this is where I'm going to get my stuff. And it was not. And I talked to so many people go, that's exactly my experience as well. So I'm curious if you had the same experience or maybe you had something different around that. This, I think this is more, much more near wheelhouse than mine. Well, it is

Cassandra Thompson 24:03

and isn't in the sense of it is, okay, I guess it has, but I have not been aggressive about it to this point because I built so much of my business on social media. I didn't do a ton of, like, the typical make a list of your friends and family and reach out and then ask them for referrals. Like, I didn't do as much of that, but in terms of who has purchased from me, it has always been referrals. But this goes to my idea of, like, When you're doing networking the right way, it feel, it can feel really effortless, or very low effort because you're just keeping up with people, and you're making sure they know what you do, so that when they need something, they can refer. Now, granted, there's a level above that, that I'm starting to get into more now, of, You know, intentionally saying, Hey, do you have a couple of names you could give me that you could refer to me? But the idea being that first you build relationships before selling, like the other example says we all have been on LinkedIn where we get that LinkedIn connection message, we connect, and then they message us immediately and sell to us. And we're like, we don't know you like, ask me a couple of questions first, you know, going back to the,

Jason Frazell 25:22

hold on, I think. So we've talked about networking, what it. isn't what, you know, you and I are aligned on what we think it should be and what the experience should be. And one of the things that I hear a lot, and I know that you do, cause you actually have content on this is, well, how do I systemize this? How do I make this something that feels like I can continue? Like, like you said, Oh, there's somebody I really want to stay in touch with. I think that's probably the. No go, no go in terms of I really want to connect to this person deeply or I don't want to at all. That's the easy one, in my opinion. Where I struggle is the middle, like, hey, like, I like this person. Yeah. I'm not exactly sure what's next for us in a business context. I could see maybe doing business or as a referral partner or affiliate partner, but I'm not exactly sure how to stay in touch so that it doesn't feel like I'm reaching out and asking when I need something. So what are some things that you would recommend or tactical things that people can start to implement in their. In their networking philosophy or in their systemization that allows people to feel comfortable making asked when they need to without it feeling like, Hey, happy birthday. I haven't talked to you for 15 years, by the way, you need some life insurance. Yeah.

Cassandra Thompson 26:44

Yeah, I mean, one is obvious. It's obvious. Everyone knows it, but we don't all do it. Keep a spreadsheet or keep a CRM or keep notes in your phone, contacts of everybody. And also just, I know it's kind of turned business referral wise, or I've sounded like really strong on that part. It's also just people you meet. Like I have a spreadsheet of just every person I've met at events, whether I think they could be a referral partner or not, because you don't know who other people know. So who do you just like and want to keep in contact with in some way? And then the key on following up that I think everyone is missing is that you need to sometimes follow up and have it not be about business. So I think a lot of people know, like if we're going to talk in the business sense, A lot of people have some sort of structure or systemization around I send my first email and then I message them and then I send a second email, right? And they have like a five to eight step sequence because it takes eight touch points. Great. And then they have, you know, Oh, I'll check in in a couple of months. And yes, mark that on your calendar. Like The, the systemization thing that I think is missing a lot if you don't have a CRM, and right now I don't, I'm doing it all by hand is that when you get off a call with someone, put them on your calendar down the road, like what's the follow up day for them? Or else you do forget. But the big thing is follow up just because you're a person who likes this other person. So yeah, you did that initial like, Hey, here's my, you know, email sales pitch sequence, essentially or, Hey, we met like, let's take a job seeker in the other direction. So it's just not all referrals. Hey, you did a zoom info session with me. Great. How do you stay in touch? Send a thank you. There's another touch point. And then stay in touch on other things. So just, I guess what I'm saying is like, it's literally just keep in touch, like, like you would with any other relationship. So happy birthday, but nothing else attached to it. Happy holidays. My two favorites. are, if this is, this is going to sound like the most no duh thing, but people don't do it. If you see something that reminds you of the person, message them. Hey, I saw this today and it reminded me of you. Like I have a friend, we, we talk here and there. I mean, we do. I have a friend that we do talk, but let's say time went on and lives get busy and we don't talk as much. I know on the first day of pumpkin spice lattes, I'm still going to take a picture of mine and text it to her and say, did you get yours today? Because we, she loves. The start of PSLs more than anybody. I have a friend from 10 years ago when I worked at longer. I don't want to put the date on it from when I worked at Wheel of Fortune that we used to love at the holidays looking at all the Christmas catalogs together or like the new Neiman Marcus always does that like luxury catalog where it has the crazy gifts. We would look at all that kind of stuff in our office, you know, on our lunch break and stuff. And since then we're both really busy. We don't that might. Be the only time we check in every year, but she's the person I think of when that catalog comes out, even though it's digital now, right? Like, she's the person I think of, but I'll message her and go, I looked at it today. Did you look at it? Like, are you going to get the, are you going to get the helicopter that comes with your own landing pad? Like, it. People just want to be remembered. And so, nobody's gonna go, That's so weird that you remember that thing and you're reaching out to it. If they do, that's on them. That's the other thing is like, If for some reason you do get the weird person that's like, Wow, this seems really strange that you remember this. Or something strange. How dare you be a caring person? How dare you? Like, that's, that's their issue. Yeah. Yeah. That's their issue. That's not yours. So that's one of the two that I think is really easy. The other one is if they give a suggestion on anything, go do the thing, buy the thing, read the thing, whatever. And this one's really nice because if you met in person and they told you about something, great. But if you're following them on socials and you see that they said Trader Joe's just got the greatest new chocolate chip cookie, I don't know, whatever. If you, if it's somebody that you're really intentional, you want to really make an impression with, go buy that stupid mix. Make the chocolate chip cookies and then tell them you bought the mix and made the cookies because of them. And they're the greatest cookies you've ever had. Do it. Like, spend the five dollars. It's, spend the calories. I don't care if you're on Weight Watcher. I don't care if you're on Ozempic, go do it. Like, it's the simplest thing. Everyone wants to know that someone took them up on a suggestion.

Jason Frazell 31:56

Yeah, because it's their suggestion and they're suggesting it because they believe it to be good. Is why somebody would suggest something. And that may, again, that just goes back to people feel good when you go, hey, thanks for the suggestion on that. Can I add in a couple of, I have a couple of small, I have a thing to add in on this and then I have something that I've started doing that's been really I think it's been successful for me and I've got good feedback on this. First of all, the, the, if the cookie absolutely here's, and this is this, I'm going to get on my soapbox for a minute because it's my podcast and I can, and you're, you're my guest so we can get a soapbox too. If I connect, if I connect you with somebody, please provide me an update on how it goes so that next time I see that person. And I cannot tell you the number of times that I've connected people like, Hey, this might be for a variety of reasons. Some of it's like straight business. Some of it is this person might be able to help you. And I then see the person that I like connected the person to that I know well, and I had no idea that they connected. And then I find out like third party. I'm like, it should take you, like if I was to connect you to somebody and I am connecting you with somebody, I'll probably hear from, I'll hear from both of you because you're both like this, but I'd like to know how the conversation, like, I don't need to know the details, but like, oh yeah, just let you know I connected with Matt. Great. That's so good. I hope you have a great conversation. So the next time I see Matt, which I'm going to see Matt, it's not like, Out of nowhere. Oh, yeah. I had this wonderful conversation. I've had this happen where I referred somebody to somebody else. They met with this person. I never heard from them. No, thank you. No anything, which I don't care so much about the thank you. But then I meet with this person. They're like, Oh, I had a blankety blank, really great conversation with whatever. And now we're doing this. And I had no idea. So then, and it's not, it's not that I need to know the details, but I should know that you had a good conversation or even worse, but Is when you ask for an introduction and I give it to you and then you don't do anything with it. That is my, especially when I've connected you both on email, I cannot stand that because now it is, it is Cassandra's name or my name out there saying you two should connect. Once you've had an exchange, I'm out, right? Like that's a BCC it's for the two of you, but you should connect. Right. You asked for it. If you ask for it, that's the one. And then something that I've done recently that I've, I've, I've, I've really enjoyed and I've gotten good feedback on it is somebody go, Hey, I want to connect you to somebody whose name, like they want to connect somebody with me, I have an introductory call category and I have a 15 minute call, 30 minute call and a 60 minute call. And I let the person choose. And I've gotten feedback that like, I really like this because if it's 15, if it's 15 minutes, like if they pick an hour, I know that they want to have like, or something in depth, most likely a lot of people pick 15 because they want to, it's, it's like speed dating, like, Hey, like, let's take 15 minutes. Let's do it. And I really liked that. And I really like when other people have done that for me, where I have a choice 1530 or 60 on the other side. I cannot stand when somebody has asked me, I don't even know them. They're like, and they send me a link to their calendar. It's only 60 minutes. They're like, Hey, book in my calendar. And they're the one who asked me for a meeting. I'm like, no. And this happens all doesn't this happen

Cassandra Thompson 35:18

to you? Yeah. Everyone has their thing.

Jason Frazell 35:20

Yeah. But doesn't this happen to you on LinkedIn all the time and you get sold to they're like, Hey, I think this would be a great fit for you. Here's a link to my calendar book an hour. I'm like, I'm not, I'm not going to do that.

Cassandra Thompson 35:31

I won't even, I won't even touch those because I'm like, that's just a sales call. I have, so it's interesting you say this because I have a, a friend chat link for Calendly that I'll send to people when we're introduced and just say like, Hey, let's get together. And what I started learning was 30 minutes wasn't enough most of the time, but nobody wants 60. It's true. 60 is too long. So I've made it 45. Calendly doesn't let you give, at least to my knowledge, Calendly doesn't let you give multiple time options to one call, or maybe after, maybe they've updated and you need to go look, but it's interesting you say this because With some people that are like a barely a warm referral. I've sent the link and then thought that probably feels too long for them. And so this again goes to like, we're all humans talking to other humans. You can politely put this in. I'm going to politely put this in my emails from now on. And. Say, don't worry. We don't have to use the full 45. If you've only got 15, I understand. That's just like, that's just what Callan Lee links for. Love it. Like, just be honest

Jason Frazell 36:39

about it. Yeah. We don't have to fill the time because it's there. Yeah. Right. That's great. It's totally fine. Well, as we, so Cassandra, as we wrap up today, what's. What's next for you in the networking world? Like what are you working on? You know, you mentioned we all have our things. What's next for you about, about just, you know, networking, what are you working on? And maybe what kind of, what kind of ideas or resources do you have for people listening around this? Cause I know you do have a lot of resources.

Cassandra Thompson 37:10

Yeah, so I am starting to do team trainings and speaking at events on how to network without the ick factor. And so if you want more of this or you've heard this and you're like, my team needs to hear how to network authentically. Feel free to message me on LinkedIn, email, et cetera. We can put that in notes

Jason Frazell 37:31

or something. I'm going to say it. If you, if you, I'm going to say it right now. If you run a team of new financial planners, please book Cassandra, because not stereotyping all of everybody out there, but this is definitely a need for sure, for sure. We need your services, we just don't want to be talked at for 30 minutes.

Cassandra Thompson 37:51

No. And then just as a resource, I do have a I don't even know what to call, I keep changing what I would call it, like a guidebook, it's honestly, it's not even templates, it's swipe files, it's copy paste of connection messages. So, if you're going, I don't know what to say when I reach out on LinkedIn, or email, or whatever, I have a bunch of different scenarios. You can copy paste, put in your own name, put in their name, slightly personalize it and send it off totally free. And so you can get that at castthompson. com backslash connection.

Jason Frazell 38:29

Nice. Wonderful. Put that in the show notes as well, but easy cast Thompson forward slash connection. Awesome. What do you want to leave the audience with today? It can be about anything we talked about, just some nuggets. My experience of you is you always have a lot of wisdom and experience around all of the things we talked about and more. What would you like to leave the audience with today? I think just

Cassandra Thompson 38:52

the overall theme that, yes, networking is like give and take. I think a lot of people hear that, oh yeah, I shouldn't just take, I also need to give. I get that. But it's really a lot of keeping in touch. If you just stay in touch here and there. You can make an ask. You can, you can help in another way, you can ask in another way, but keep in touch. That's the part that gets left

Jason Frazell 39:15

out a lot. Yeah, keep in touch. As I know, it's something I struggle with as well. I think most people listening would say, yeah, it can be really challenging, but we've given you some ways to do that. And I want to thank you for coming back on again. It's been great to have you on and get to know you even more than last year in terms of something that you are, you know, one of the people in my network that I consider an expert on this. Keep up the good work you're doing for all of us out there and wish you the very best continued success in what everything you have going on, Cassandra. Thanks, Jason.

39:45

Thanks for listening to another episode of Talking to Cool People with Jason Frizzell. If you enjoyed today's episode, please tell your friends, follow us on Instagram and Facebook, and give us a shout out, or take a moment to leave a review on iTunes. If something from today's episode piqued your interest and you'd like to connect, email us at podcast at jasonfrizzell. com. We love hearing from our listeners because you're cool people too.