Coaching Conversations in 2025

Magnetic Coaching: Part One

Tim Hagen

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Magnetic Coaching: Part One

 

When you think about the effects of a magnet, it really has two effects. It either pulls things in or it repels them or pushes them away. Aren't people the same way? Think about a person that you met, that you were introduced to by a friend. Didn't you have an immediate impression of like, or dislike of that person? Now let us add some further context with a little bit of humor. Would it not be funny if somebody said, “so what did you think of my friend, Bob? And you actually said “I'm neutral. I really had no opinion when I talked to him? It sounds funny, doesn't it? 

 

So, when we think about leadership and coaching, two things happen, we either pull people in or we push them away. Some common ways that we push people away is by calling them into our office as leaders and always giving them constructive feedback. It demotivates, it creates a lack of inspiration. It breaks down the very fiber of the team. On the other hand, if a leader were to call somebody into the office on a regular basis, praising them for a specific job well done would not that bring somebody into the fold, into the team environment, positively and cooperatively. Of course, it would. Magnetic coaching is about bringing people in and leveraging the good things that they do yet as well as making them aware of the opportunities where they can raise their game. We get so fixated on providing feedback and how to deliver constructive feedback. Our suggestion would be do not even use the words constructive feedback, use language such as raise your game or opportunities to support your strength, the opportunity to address some things that might personally frustrate you. Language is important and it invites people in versus pushes them away. Everything that we do with our language, either pushes people away or pulls people in.

 

Here is another example, Bob, you are doing a great job, but the one thing that frustrates me is your personal time management. You are all over the place. On the other hand, if a leader said, “Bob, here are the three areas I love to collaborate with you. You have great product knowledge, you work well with others, and you really know the company's procedures. And I think about adding time management to your list of strengths, hearing that, w

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