Hope Johnson's Wisdom Dialogues
Hope Johnson's Wisdom Dialogues
Behavior-Will Conflict | A Course in Miracles Deep Dive @ Lake Whatcom, WA | December 31, 2025
Ever act from your heart and still feel torn inside? We unpack a core ACIM insight: behavior–will conflict. The twist isn’t moral—your true will already aligns with peace. The friction comes from mistaking ego preferences for what you actually want. That misrecognition creates strain, hesitation, and guilt, even when you choose rightly. The remedy is gentle and practical: steady attention, honest study, and mind watching that invites perception to be corrected in the moment.
We explore how study periods are cooperation with guidance, not homework for spiritual overachievers. Attention becomes the doorway to sane perception, where “right action” flows without force. Fantasies about a “perfect life” are exposed as distractions that occupy the mind and delay peace. Instead, we return to the holy instant—recognizing that discomfort is a signal to look again, not proof that we’re off-path. From this place, everyday choices reorganize around truth.
Cameo 14, “The Chain of Miscreation,” offers a vivid, relatable story: a missed nudge to offer a cab ride cascades into delay, cold, and compensatory “atonements” that make things worse. The lesson is concrete—countering error with error multiplies fear; asking for guidance collapses time. Even irritation at a stranger can become a miracle when we build confidence instead of joining in error. By meeting attack as a call for love and seeing innocence in all players, we dissolve strain at its source.
If you’re ready to trade efforting for clarity, this deep dive brings theology down to street level—how to spot ego scripts, decline them kindly, and let peace lead. Subscribe, share with a friend who overthinks “right action,” and leave a review telling us where you felt the biggest shift.
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Aloha and welcome to ACIM, a course in miracles deep dive with Hope Johnson coming to you from Lake Watcombe, Washington. Woo! On New Year's Eve, apparently. What fun! Yeah. Okay, so we are on a course in miracles. Complete annotated edition. Came out in 2021. It's a purple edition. It's complete with all the notes and everything that was written originally. It's got great footnotes, more information, a lot more that wasn't in there initially. And we are doing a deep talk, deep dive beginning in chapter three, paragraph three, sentence seven. And before I do that, I'm gonna summarize what we've been through in this chapter called Same Perception. That's fun, huh? Okay. First, we're gonna tune in. Yay! All right, everyone.
SPEAKER_03:Take a nice breath.
SPEAKER_06:Our hearts are so grateful for this opportunity to be together, joining minds, joining intention, joining in purpose, recognizing God's will for us as perfect happiness, and seeing how to choose the direction in our mind that leads to that one blessed outcome. Yay everyone! Let's have a beautiful deep dive. All right. So this chapter, chapter three, insane perception, and we're in section one called the need to study. So far, we've covered that learning is not passive, that all learning requires attention and willingness. Okay, I mean, even if you just come in here and you just go to sleep, there's still some attention and willingness occurring, right? There's nothing to feel bad about, just recognizing this is how it works. It takes attention and willingness to learn, right? Okay, so this course, a course in miracles, is a mind training course. This is not a belief system that you adopt like a cult that you get in on. Okay, although it's treated like that a bunch, isn't it? Right? We all got the same language that we use, all right? That kind of thing. Well, it's not like that, it's a mind training course, so that you can apply the truth, apply healing, miraculous mindset in the moment. See? So study periods are introduced as a form of cooperation. It's like a signal that you're cooperating with Jesus now. He's always cooperating with you. All right, he's always cooperating with you. You can look at it like this. He's like a big brother, right? He's standing with you at the end of the timeline, looking back on it. You believe you're on the timeline. He's like, Come on, buddy, it's okay. Relax, the timeline will get all end quicker. Right? Because our mind is basically projecting more time down a timeline until we start collapsing that timeline. And we collapse the timeline by seeing through our illusions that are making it project forward. So, study periods when you stuff when you schedule study periods, right? Because normally most of the day you're looking at all these delusional thoughts about the world, taking them to be real, occupying yourself. This is what I notice a lot. I don't have a bunch of occupying myself because I love to be just open and listening to the spirit. What I notice, people seem to be clamoring to do more shit. See that clamoring to get more recognition, to get more this, to get more that, right? Uh and this occupation tends to take priority over study periods, right? It's just a fearful programming play now, right? This way of trying to understand in a sense of, okay, I know what all the words say or something like that, or what it really means and stuff like that. But if in if you're studying and you're cooperating with Jesus, you're gonna learn eventually to see how to uh how to have your guidance in the moment and that guidance being the rest that you need, the guidance itself, right? Because you're always listening to one or one of two guides. So he also talks about how we assume that the answers to our problems are in a course in miracles a lot, but we don't look. And you know, back then they didn't even have AI to look for you. Now we can type it in and say, find this in a course in miracles for me. What does it say? Here's the uploaded book. So actually, the invitation is actually to look at what's been given whenever you uh sense any kind of struggle. Even worldly struggles, it doesn't matter what it is. So he's saying many of the problems we struggle with may have already been solved by what you've learned in a course in miracles thus far. We're at chapter three right now. Okay. The issue isn't that the answers aren't in there, but you're not using them because you know you probably haven't uh you probably haven't realized that a course in miracles is actually the solution to all of your problems. Like all of your problems. All right. So he's saying that Jesus is saying that many of the problems we still struggle with are already solved by what we've learned thus far. Okay. He also introduced mental retardation as a defense mechanism, both as clinically uh limited, cognitively limited, and you know, he pointed out uh what that was about. And he also said how when we're studying a course in miracles, we often do pretend or pseudo mental retardation. Like, I can't get this, I'm not smart enough to do this. That's the ego, okay? So clinical uh mental retardation, Jesus is basically saying that they're taking a break from having normal, what we consider normal cognition because they were using it for um feeding the ego so much, they were losing so much ground that they actually took a break. So they could just be receptive to love and giving love without trying to strategize everything. Yeah, see, so when you so when you when you recognize that, it's not like oh, that poor person or how did this happen or something? You're just like, hey, yeah, what fun. You're on that kind of lifetime. Awesome. Thanks for doing that, right? So Jesus said that mental re mental retardation as a defense mechanism can be used either for truth or illusion at our election. See that? So if you perceive mental retardation in any way, you start feeling sorry for the person, that's using it, that's using the defense toward illusion. Okay, it is a it is a defense, it's actually a defense that's set up to protect the truth in you, right? So when you're recognizing it like that and you're looking at it in that way, it's all how you're seeing, you're actually using it for truth, right? So Jesus was warning us that we may be using the defense mechanism of mental retardation when we read the course in a way that undermines our learning and his teaching. So it's just it's this it's described as a joint attack on ourselves and on Jesus, but it is no way referencing a being a failure or a sin. Okay, that's not what it means. You can say that again so you guys can get it. He's saying it is a joint attack when you do the pseudo-mental retardation thing about not being able to get this. It's a joint attack on your mind and on his teaching. You're learning his teaching, right? But he's saying, in no way is this a failure or a sin. It's not like that. Okay, because uh none of this stuff that uh denies love, denies truth actually happens, anyways. It just kind of like eats up the time that you're given in this lifetime doing that. Nothing's wrong. You're just given opportunity to shift into miracle-mindedness. It's teaching you how to shift into miracle-mindedness, okay. So when you do use the defense of mental retardation, it makes you confused and fearful. That's how you can know you did it. Oops, that's not true. One friend told me last night uh that she just likes being bitchy. And I'm like, that is not you. I like pretending, I like that. No, that's not even you speaking. So recognizing that that's the ego, you're not capable of even thinking in this way. This is dream thinking. Recognizing it's the ego, you're out of it instantly, you're back into peace. And that's the thing about a Course in Miracles, it's mind training for the holy instant, where you return instantly to the truth of what and who you are.
SPEAKER_05:So it's like being able to step back and see the person that's saying that they like to be bitchy, even that is um not them.
SPEAKER_06:Something to not be violent. That's right. So, so my friend's saying, I like to pretend and act like a bitch, and I'm like, Yeah, just notice that's the ego talking, not you. Really.
SPEAKER_02:I have a friend that in some instances uh they're very angry, they will vocalize that they're giving themselves permission to be actually more horrible in this case towards me because of what they're proceeding and doing, and that sounds like a huge ego thought. Definitely, or he's saying things that most of my people would call the police about, and then they're like, and because you're like this, I'm going to like act even worse. And I'm like, I can't be angry with that because that's all ego.
SPEAKER_06:That's so sweet. Yeah, so so what Romy is talking about is how someone's using justification saying, because you're this bad person, I'm gonna give myself permission to lash out at you, right? That's so so uh that's a common ego thing. I see that all the time. I see it on Facebook, right? Because you're such a piece of shit. I'm gonna be a piece of shit to you back. This is what you deserve. So, yeah, that that's the thing. When you're recognizing that that's just the ego saying something like that, you get out of that loop of being pissed and throwing attacks back and forth because you're recognizing, oh, they're just speaking from the ego. That doesn't really mean anything. They're trying to justify these attacks right now. These attacks are on themselves. This is a call for love. So when you see it gently, that's really how you meet the call for love, is by seeing it gently. And the truth about it is gentleness. The truth about you and the truth about them. When their mind is trapped in an erroneous thought, right? Now you trapped lightly there because no one's really trapped. It's the choice, right? They they don't recognize they're doing that. They're actually asking for help. The help is seeing that they're just attacking their own mind, they're mistaken. It's okay. It's not up to you to tell them that they're mistaken, but to reveal to them the truth of who they are, right? By knowing it for yourself. You cannot extend to someone what you haven't received for yourself. So letting your heart go to softness for them instead of keep on fighting. And if you do keep on fighting, look, it's perfect. Okay, it can't go wrong. It's exactly what you need to help you see beyond where you're seeing right now. Yay. So when we don't understand our mind or Jesus' mind because we're attacking, we're attacking him as a teacher and us as a learner, we don't know what's really being willed for us. So there's will confusion. We're gonna get into that in the next sentence. So this uh this section, the central central theme of this section, section three, uh strain doesn't come from uh the strain doesn't come from opposing the truth. You can't really oppose the truth, okay? It's because you have believed that that opposition is you, that of who's opposing is actually you. You're never opposing the truth. Your will is one with God, but you perceive something opposing truth and take it as if it's yourself. See that you're not really capable of doing that in reality. So you're learning how to see things differently. See that that you're not getting disturbed so much by things that are on the surface, you're you're being relaxed, and you're never really disturbed by things on the surface. They just trigger something that's already present there. So the conflict that you're sensing isn't coming from you being rebellious to Jesus. You can't do that either. Okay, it's not like I'm so bad, I don't want to make Jesus cry. Gosh. You know, it's like it, it's like he uh it's it's like he he wants you to see, definitely. He totally wants you to see, but there's totally no anger or anything coming from him when you don't, right? His his whole thing, and I'm saying his also, and look at what is Jesus, anyways. Let's say it's a field of consciousness in your mind. This field of consciousness is totally for you seeing through the dream, right? It's never gonna get pissed at you for not doing that. See that? This is the this is the the field of consciousness that we call Jesus. Each of us is representing a field of consciousness, okay? And and this and all consciousness is within our mind. So that includes Jesus, right? It's like I am Jesus, there's no separation, right? So it's a listening to this voice, then and you can call it another name too. I mean, it doesn't matter. Listen to this voice directing you all the time and let that be your state of ease. It's in the direction, it's in the guidance in the moment, it's not some outcome later. Okay, confusion comes from misunderstanding what your mind is. So that's why you can come back to peace immediately. So the course is asking us to relax into clarity, less effort, more relaxing. That's why he talks about setting the time to study. You got a time period for study, not where you got to be efforting, you're just paying attention. You're focused and you're paying attention during that time. All right. Attention is the doorway to sane perception. Woo! I rest where I am led. Apparently, you have been listening to my ACIM lessons, a Course in Miracles daily lessons, which I just completed and uploaded the last one, all 365 lessons. Yay! I feel celebratory about this. Woo! That was fun. Thank you for joining. And the last five lessons have exactly the same text, but I gave five different contemplations. It was fun. By the way, you guys, you can find that on hopejohnson.org. Use the drop down that says free resources. It'll be in there. ACIM daily lessons. I recommend them if you are gonna do ACIM. If you're gonna do a course in miracles, the mind training itself. It's a daily lesson. And I have a contemplation. I read and do the contemplation on every single one now. Woo! All right, let's get started with our text now. Ah, yeah. Let's see. Where are we starting today? We are going with paragraph three. This is uh chapter three, section one, same perception, paragraph three, sentence seven. I've basically caught you guys up from uh paragraphs one, two, and most of three up to this point. All right, here's the sentence. It is thus impossible to avoid behavior will conflict as defined before, because even if you acted according to will, you wouldn't know it. And this sentence has a footnote. Footnote five. Quote, behavior will conflict occurs when the will to do conflicts with what you do, and that's from chapter two. In the above sentence, this conflict is inevitable when you don't understand your own mind. This is still from the footnote, because that means you also won't understand your will, what you really want. And then having identified with a false version of your will, when you try to do the right thing, you will experience yourself as straining against what you really want to do. Really is in quotes here, against what you quote, really want to do, when in fact, your true desire, which has been hidden in your unconscious, is to do the right thing. Okay, so we're gonna get into this. This is fun, this is juicy. I think most of this talk is gonna be on this one sentence because this is such a rich sentence here, okay. So, first thing I want to give an example. What is behavior will conflict? This is one of the uh this this is one of the concepts in the in a course in miracles that's uh fun to understand. All right, behavior will conflict. Imagine someone feels guided to speak honestly in a relationship. They do speak honestly honestly. That was their guidance, and then they do speak honestly, they're choosing clarity, they're not avoiding, okay? They say what needs to be said, but internally their experience feels like tension, it feels like hesitation, self-doubt, a sense of I don't really want to do this. This is behavior, will, conflict. Afterward, they might think part of me wanted to be honest, but another part of me didn't. I forced myself to do the right thing. Okay. Or my real desire was to keep the peace. Let's say when you spoke out, it seemed to not be well taken, it seemed to disturb peace, whatever. Okay. So the key is to get in touch with what the guidance is, don't base it on outcomes. So this is what Jesus is saying. Uh this is behavior will conflict as experiences. So here's what as experience, here's what's really going on, what Jesus is saying. The person did act according to their true will. They did. Their true will was honesty, clarity, joining, peace, you can say, right? These are your true will. But they identified with the eager, the ego's false desire, which is avoid discomfort, preserve an image, escape fear. That's why there was tension in doing the right thing. See that? Because it feels like strain. It's like, I don't really want to do this. All right. And it's not because their will actually oppose the action. Their will is in alignment with that action, but it's because they mistook the ego's wishes for their own. That's all that's gonna cause strain. Okay. That's why I say whatever it is that you seem to be doing, do it with miracle-mindedness. Right? Do it with full awareness. This is what I'm choosing to do. Note that whatever it is that you seem to be doing, it's what you are choosing to do. Okay. So when people act in alignment with truth and it feels like a strain, remember when you find yourself doing that, those are not your real thoughts. The true, your true desire is being hidden by those thoughts. Your desire is for honesty, clarity, all that lovely peace, everything. And and you know, listening to your guidance leads to that immediately, which comes out in all the actions. That's why they're called right actions. Okay, the reason it feels like conflict, okay, it's because the mind is saying if this feels uncomfortable, it must not be what I really want. It's not always comfortable to listen to your guidance and doing the right thing. But knowing that you want it, you could be at peace with it. Okay. Or thinking if I were aligned, this would feel easier. That thought is also an ego thought. You do not need to be aligned because you are the alignment. Okay, just recognizing that you're not accepting that right now. Another ego thought is that resistance means I'm going against myself. No, the resistance means you're identifying with an ego thought. So Jesus is correcting this here. He's saying the discomfort doesn't come from opposing your own will. The discomfort, uh, that's really coming from misrecognizing your will. You don't recognize that this is your will. So even when you do exactly what your true will wants, you're gonna experience things like strain, guilt, hesitation because you think your will is something else. How common this is. It's like in in what you would say everyday life, right? It's like uh all these things that you're like, I don't really want to do that, but I have to do it, right? And and and you're recognizing your will is really peace and happiness and joy, all these virtues that you could consider virtues, extending love. That's all it is, and that's something that you don't need anything to change for. You just see past what's blocking that.
SPEAKER_05:Maybe it gets hard because um a lot of time maybe we feel confusion over we know we want peace as a goal, but there's the way the ego would present peace, there would be conditions.
SPEAKER_06:There would be conditions in the world, right? The way the ego presents it is there's conditions, or there's conditions on yourself. Like you should be a certain way first, it's coming later. The ego is always looking for peace to be in the future. So, one of the lines in the sentence, even if you acted according to your will, you wouldn't know it. And that's because of the strain that's introduced by listening to the the ego. He's saying you can be aligned and choosing rightly, you can be following God's will and still believe you're betraying yourself because you're confusing ego preference with your will. Your will is benevolent. Anything that's not that, that's ego preference.
SPEAKER_05:What would it look like in the course of a day? When those moments where someone is following their will truly, can that be what would that look like?
SPEAKER_06:You think someone following their what would it look like for someone following their true what their will truly? Well, Jesus has put it like this you're gonna have a good day. And he even says, have a good day. Put it like that, it's just a joyful day, right? Is you're you're just in listening mode all day. You're that means you're not in strategy mode, you're right. You're not going, you're not trying to do specific miracles for anyone, right? You're just listening to guidance because miracles, like what we learned in chapter one, is that miracles are actually um not planned, involuntary. Okay, not plan, you don't plan miracles. You know, when Jesus talks about not planning in a course in miracles, he's talking about not planning for miracles. He's not saying you shouldn't write anything on your planner. Some people confuse that with something. I mean, I have too, myself included, right? It's like if you're just listening to guidance, some of that guidance may be to write something on a planner. It could be anything. It's just you know in the moment because you're asking, you're tuned in, you're looking for the guidance. You know, this is early on in a course in miracles. We're only in chapter three. It gets to the point where you're not asking, you just recognize it. You just recognize what the guidance is. And you know, if you if you're not sure about it, just keep watching. You're gonna get more information as you go along. But you don't need to be um following any more ego thoughts, yeah, you know, and and the way to not follow them is to recognize what they are, to see them coming. So your true will is never gonna conflict with right action. That's loving action that comes out of love. And you know, this is really uh the action is an effect of thinking. So this is really directional in your thought. Your true will doesn't oppose your peace. The conflict that you feel occurs when you misidentified an ego thought as if it's coming from you. It's your own thought. You can look at ego thoughts as I like to see them as apparitions, kind of like these dark figures coming from outside of me trying to talk to me. And I'm like, no, thanks, bro. Right? It's just like really simple, like that. Way that that way it's not identified as my thought. I only have benevolent thoughts, I don't have other kinds of thoughts.
SPEAKER_04:I keep he the maybe other people say too the insane voice talking to itself, the insane voice talking to itself, right?
SPEAKER_06:Why should I listen to that? I don't need to listen to that. So, whatever feels like I didn't want to do this is often I didn't recognize that this is what I wanted. You can change that. You know, that might be fun just to change that around when you find yourself doing something that you seem to not want to be doing, saying, I just didn't recognize this was exactly what I wanted. Right? And you're gonna probably sense some resistance in the body's energy field. That's okay. That's what Jesus is talking about, that discomfort. That doesn't mean you're doing it wrong. A discomfort doesn't mean you're doing it wrong. Notice the discomfort is trying to convince you that you have a different will that's not your own. It'll pass. Let it pass. So the relief in this teaching is that resistance doesn't mean failure. Resistance isn't a bad thing. It's looking at it as what it is, right? It's not it's not a reality about you, it's just meant for seeing through. This helps you to recognize that your discomfort does not mean misalignment. Okay, that's just an ego thought to see past, it's not anything too correct. So when there's confusion, notice confusion in your mind, that's this strain Jesus is talking about. You've caused unnecessary strain from believing that the ego thoughts are your thought. This clarity resolves that, right? Is recognizing because now there's nothing to fix about you. You can't even think that thought. You thought you thought that thought. So understanding. So this is an understanding to see right now that this is the way your mind is. Your mind is benevolent, and let this restore ease. Whatever's not benevolent, that you could see is coming from outside of your mind, kind of like a hindrance, a temptation. Identify with this. It's like, no, thanks. I'm good. When your true will is recognized, behavior doesn't feel like self-betrayal anymore. See, it just feels like any any any behavior, it just feels like relief, like everything that you perceive can just be brought to the truth. You can't make any mistakes except for mistaking yourself to be something you're not right now. So when your will is obscured from your own sight, your behavior is gonna feel conflicted. That's how it's gonna be, because you're not aware of your will, your benevolent will. So you're inevitably, he's saying, your behavior is gonna feel conflicted. Anytime you're not you feel unsure, I mean, I I even see people like just being unsure of what they're doing in the moment, kind of like, oh, who's gonna correct me and tell me I'm doing it wrong, right? Just always recognizing that whatever it is you seem to be doing, that is perfect, and that goes for whatever it is anyone else seems to be doing, too, no matter how you seem to feel. Okay, go back to that. So behavior will conflict that represents a split between what you seem to do and what you believe you want to do. So that leads to this is how you know you got behavior will conflict because it leads to strain, guilt, hesitation, inconsistency. Basically, I would say a form of insanity. Right. This section is called once again the same perception. So the footnote explains why this happens. If you don't understand your mind, and we've read this earlier on in this section, too. You can't understand your actual will. So understanding your mind here is understanding your benevolence as far as your ability to will. Like you can only will benevolently, you can't will another way, you can choose to see it another way, which is what you've been doing. You're just choosing it to see it a different, a different way, and now you're getting mind training to see it the other way, to see it the right way, and then you won't be hindered by any of this stuff.
SPEAKER_01:So, what it's trying to say is like and but benevolent means like good, right?
SPEAKER_06:Perfect, holy, innocent, peaceful.
SPEAKER_01:Well, we all want to have a a good peaceful life.
SPEAKER_02:And and from what I'm getting, that's the goal of this is to learn to like clear the town the way to see that you already have it and you can appreciate it.
SPEAKER_06:Well, okay, so yeah, he's going, we all want a good, peaceful life, and to see, you know, the purpose of this mind training is to see that you already have it and appreciate it. Okay, uh, sort of okay, so this isn't real. What we're perceiving here is not real life. We actually want to collapse time, we all also want to resolve illusions so that we can see the reality that's actually created for us. This is not it. When you're saying have a good, peaceful life, you know, what comes up in my mind is, and then you die at the end. That is not it. Well, you know, we're actually the the end goal is eternal life, which is where we actually are. This is a dream of death that we're repeating over and over and over again. So it's way beyond, yes, it is good for having a nice, peaceful life, too.
SPEAKER_02:That's just another thing in the way.
SPEAKER_06:Yeah. What do you mean?
SPEAKER_02:What I just said is like just another illusion.
SPEAKER_06:Well, let's say that that what you just said about having a nice, peaceful life, it is an effect of what you're doing here. But what the ego thinks of as a nice, peaceful life may not be it because you're being orchestrated in this dream to be exactly where you are to help undo the mind of the that thought itself to be separate. It may not look like what your idea of a peaceful, great, blessed life looks like, but you knowing what it's for is what gives you that interpretation, no matter what it looks like. See? So it's not like you couldn't find yourself in like a small prison cell freezing your fucking ass off as part of what you're doing. Here, right? But you're not gonna mind when you know what it's for, and you know, Jesus says no one has to learn through pain, so there's no reason to be afraid of any of these things, okay? If you're being orchestrated in any kind of way, it's perfect for the relationship that you have with everyone and with Christ, right? So it's always going to be an opportunity for you to see and express that peaceful life that you are through whatever kind of dynamics or experience life seems to be. And that's why you're having a peaceful life. Because look at a lot of people think of peaceful life. Things are going my way. I don't have too much disruption, right? I don't have too many reasons to get upset, right? So this allows unconscious thoughts to remain unconscious and keep on festering in the unconscious and projecting more and more lives, right? You don't want more lives because each one leads to death. No matter how fucking good it seems to be, your punishment at the end is another death sentence with all kinds of warm-ups for death, conflict, perceiving violence, even if you're not involved in it yourself, right? This and for the inner child, you could say the holy innocent one, this is like ah, horror. Right? So the goal is actually to collapse time and see where we actually are. We're not even seeing where we are. These eyes don't see anything. They're interpreting what you could say, the dogs of a thought of separation went out to fetch and bring it back. Okay. Separate bodies seemingly on a trajectory somewhere between birth and death. This is not the world God created for us. So, yes. Uh, does it lead to a common, peaceful life? Yes, it is because you are the common, peaceful life. Right? And pure and and total confidence that all of your experiences are arising exactly as you need to. Not so you can get some more activity, right? Or get some recognition somewhere. When are they gonna fucking recognize me? Who cares? That's not what this is for. It's not for getting anything in the illusion, right? It's not forgetting anything. A thought occurred to my mind. Oh God, please don't make me famous. I do not need this much attention. I just want to chill out. And then it's like even giving that up, you know. If that's necessary, that's necessary, you know. It's like uh it's like keeping my mind free for guidance, always listening for guidance, means I'm not taking the reins and deciding on anything for myself, right? Just letting it unfold.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, you can kind of notice. Uh, if you're with me, I'll notice I'm going on a fantasy of like what it would be like to have a peaceful life. Uh-huh. So now red flags are going off more frequently of like that truth is not gonna uh not gonna experience truth through like a fantasy where there's a value weighting. That's right. Where it's like, oh wait, but I would tweak it that way and using the mind um peace. I'm gonna experience peace when I don't follow that train.
SPEAKER_06:Like it's just even I'm more aware of like the fantasy aspect where if I notice I'm going into like fantasizing on fantasizing on what would be the perfect life, yeah, what would be the most peaceful life for you? That's what that's what you're talking about. Yeah, that's just helpful. It's actually more as she's saying it's not helpful, it's actually more of an obstacle. So here's what's happening, you know, when you're fantasizing, it's like you're believing you know what's in your best interest, and that's one of the lessons in a course in miracles to learn that you don't understand what's in your best interest. Okay, so you don't know really what a peaceful life looks like. And the way I deal with any kind of fantasy, fantasy like that or anything, is just recognizing that it is fantasy and that it's not helpful. That's all. And you know, you're not gonna be following thoughts that you know are not helpful, not for very long, anyways. You're just aware, oh, that thought's not even helpful. Oh, look at what it's saying. That's not even helpful, you know, just like noticing that you don't have to try to push it away or anything.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, you start to realize what the the cost of that, the cost of following a fantasy is you could have instead been just thinking thoughts with God.
SPEAKER_06:You're what right, your mind was occupied. So following a fantasy that occupies your mind, it's like you're telling God how you want your life to go, which isn't even true. So your mind is being occupied by those thoughts where you can't listen to what's being called of you this instant, and just letting your life unfold from within. So when you operate from a false version of your desire, that's something that opposes the will of God, which is your true will. That's when you have to deal with strain and guilt and stuff like that. He's not saying that you're wrong or bad, he's saying these are the consequences. That's how you know you did it. You know, and you're giving yourself these consequences so that you will repent that thought. You see how this gets confused with like judgment and punishment and stuff like that, because the ego takes it through a lens of separation, and you can say that's you know, that's intentional that for this to be taken through a lens of separation, so you don't get it. Durga, there's a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in. That's from Leonard Cohen, yeah. Yes, what a blessing everything is. Thank you, sweeties. So when you do that, when you operate from a false version of your desire, just believing that the ego's version of your desire is true, it makes the illusion I want one thing, but I'm doing another. That's an illusion. To own it, to take total responsibility is I want this, what I seem to be doing right now. I'm projecting everything. I'm projecting the resistance to it, I'm projecting the thoughts about it, everything. And I want to see clearly the idea that you can't follow through. You ever get that thing? You can't follow through. Also, behavior will conflict. Right? You don't follow through or not follow through. You just enjoy that particular experience, whatever it is, whether there's resisting in it, resistance to doing the right thing, let's say, in it, recognizing what it is. Also, look at this. This is a good one. The ego tells you that your impulses are against your spiritual intentions. Those are not your impulses. That's the only thing. And no thing that you seem to do in the world indicates you're going the wrong way, going the wrong direction. It's the way you see it. Okay, you're making an idea that it's that it's it's indicating you're doing something wrong. The way you're behaving, no, the way you're behaving is coming up as an effect so you can see it and use it to see truly. So Jesus corrects this misunderstanding, saying that your true desire is always aligned with right action. Don't identify with the ego's false will, and you won't have any strain. If you do perceive strain, recognizing that you've been identified with the ego's false will, that's the reason you perceive strain. What is the ego's false will? It may be a thought that you would rather be doing something else. Recognizing that's the ego's false will, that's where the strain comes in. You're gonna feel it and help resolve that thought. It's a it's a thought that is not uh helping you to see unless you use it rightly. When you use it, you know, everything leads back to peace when you use it rightly. So it's never coming from any real problem or division in you. Okay, this identification is not coming from any real problem or division. That's why healing is instantaneous. The moment you recognize that's not you, you're released from it. So he said, even if you acted according to your will, you wouldn't know it in that sentence. So you might actually be hearing from the spirit, you might actually be choosing direct correctly. Is it is it kind? Is it loving? Is it peaceful, right?
SPEAKER_05:What does it mean you? Who's the you and you wouldn't know it? Like your true self or like your personality self.
SPEAKER_06:Even if you were acted, even if you acted according to your will, you wouldn't know it. You wouldn't know it. Let's say that's that he's talking about your ego uh version, yeah, identity, yeah. Yeah, because uh because see, well, let's say uh let's say it's both of those things, because the observer, the one that knows everything, is actually obscuring the sight. Okay, so that's why he's saying you wouldn't know it because your sight is obscured by these thoughts that you're believing, you're clouding your own sight with it, right? So then you end up perceiving as an ego, not seeing truly, right? So it's kind of both because you're always and you said the will always aligns with right action, your true will always aligns with right action. Okay. So you might actually have chosen correctly, you might be acting in accordance with God's will, but you would not recognize recognize it because you would perceive the ego's wishes as if they're your actual will. Your will is never has anything to do with the ego's will wishes. So behavior will conflict isn't a real conflict. See that it's a perceptual confusion when that's straightened out, it's just caused by misunderstanding, and so that's why this mind training it changes it so you see it differently. Oh, wait a minute, that's not my thought, and that's how it is for me. It's like, oh, that's not a real thought. Doesn't need uh, it doesn't need anything for me.
SPEAKER_05:I'm suddenly remembering like being a child and just being so like, oh, happy, go lucky, carefree. And then sort of those first times when you're a kid where you're doing something in your total innocence, so just like guidance, right? And someone has like a negative reaction about it, and it's like so alarming. You know, so what are these how are these people? We they're in our field, so it's kind of like we yeah, we set people up to do stuff like that.
SPEAKER_06:Yeah. So so she's talking about how when you're a kid and you're just happy and you're listening to your guidance, and then someone takes it away where they they they seem like you're irritating or done something bad or something like that. I think we've all, like, especially in in my age range, have had spankings for just being happy, go lucking, and and and playing, and you know, seeing that when that memory comes back to your mind, you're projecting that memory now. It didn't happen. You're setting that up to make it seem like following your guidance is unsafe. That's all. All right, it's not really true. Following your guidance is always where your safety is. You just get you're giving yourself that it didn't really happen, you're giving yourself that memory right now. You're always projecting your memories now. So behavior will conflict isn't a real conflict, it's caused by misunderstanding your mind. This is correcting that misunderstanding. When you don't know your will, you're gonna experience action as strain. That's always the reason. Your will is the same as the will of God, it's peace. Peace is your natural motivation. Love is your only natural impulse. You don't have an impulse other than that. So confusion, not sin, causes the sense of misalignment with spirit. Misunderstanding, not rebellion, not something else, causes strain. It's just misunderstanding and clarity, not some effort, resolves this conflict.
SPEAKER_05:Would that be would that be open for an involuntary miracle there where it's like I'm like, oh man, god a memory of like oh joy, and then a spanking and um just a willingness to see the innocence in all players?
SPEAKER_06:Yeah, it's it actually begins with that willingness to see the innocence in all players. That's forgiveness, okay? So you know you're willing to see that, and then and and then when when you're seeing, okay, all play, why are all players innocent in this? Because it didn't happen, actually. That's why the players are innocent in it, and then you're looking at it and you're going, Why did I make that scenario up? And you can see what the scenario is saying that it's dangerous to follow your guidance. Oh, thank goodness that isn't true, and what I thought happened didn't even happen. I'm just projecting evidence right now, and it doesn't mean anything, it's evidence of nothing. See how that is? It's really simple. This mind training brings you back to some simplicity. It's confusion, it's not sin. That's why it could be resolved in an instant. Your true will is always to do the right thing. But if you don't recognize that that is your will, you're gonna interpret right action as self-betrayal. Like I can't just let them off the hook and see them as innocent. The ego thinks it really happened. The ego thinks that that thing really happened. I can't just recognize that I'm projecting it right now for a feeling. That's what's making the the the dream progress. Because there's refusal to recognize that. That's why it just keeps on going. You know, it and and when you're when you're collapsing time, you're so you're so in your will doing the right thing. It's total joy. So ego impulses also get also get um identified as if they're your authentic impulses. Ego impulse is always to protect, defend, project, blame. See, so Jesus is just revealing how self-deception works, so you can stop mistaking, mistaking the ego wishes for your will. Start mistake, stop mistaking this kind of strain, the strain that comes from misunderstanding, as resistance. See? Resistance isn't even a problem. It could it it should just be what it is. The mind is when the mind is understood as being benevolent, this conflict completely disappears. When your will is recognized as naturally aligning with truth and peace, so does your behavior. If you're always saying I'm a miserable failure, my mind isn't good enough, my mind is evil, of course, you're gonna get the effects of that.
SPEAKER_05:Is it also in thought?
SPEAKER_06:It is all in thought. Will is all in thought. Yeah. So here's what Jesus doesn't mean when he says true will. He's not saying this is a moral impulse. Okay, it's not personal, it's not about personal effort to behave well. It's not like that. It's not pressure to choose correctly. It's not a desire to get it right. Okay, so that all those things would be more like creating strain. You see that? And he's trying to undo strain.
SPEAKER_03:The aim of this teaching is to undo strain.
SPEAKER_06:So, what your true will actually is, it's your mind. Orientation toward truth. That's your true will. Accepting correction. Anything that doesn't feel like it's true, it's not. Let it be given up for correction. And here's here's how you know it's not true. You don't like it.
SPEAKER_03:You don't like it. It's not true. It's not true. It's not even there.
SPEAKER_06:One of the beginning lessons is a in a course in miracles is I'm upset because I see what is not there. That's a cause of upset, is seeing what's not really there. True will is the will to be joined. Our minds to join instead of separate instead of put up walls and defenses. True will is for peace over conflict. You don't want any of your brothers or sisters to see themselves as being wrong when you're willing truly. You want to join with everyone in truth. That's why A Course in Miracles says the will of God is perfect happiness. That's not an instruction for you, it's a description of the direction you're being led. And you can let that direction be easeful. So here's why do the right thing can be misleading, language-wise. Okay. When people hear my true will is to do the right thing, the ego will translate this as I should behave better. That's not what we're saying here. This is not what's being said here. Jesus is not talking about shoulds at all. He's talking about truth. Right action occurs because perception has been corrected. So that's the thing. So we want the perception. That's our goal. Perception corrected. Back to sanity. It means the line, the mind isn't split. Fear has been withdrawn. Okay. Action that flows from this clarity is a way water flows. It's not putting up any resistance, it's just wholly loving. You know, for me, I'm just completely in recognition that whatever I seem to be doing, and this from practicing this a lot, is so perfect. I'm happy about it because it's so perfect. So when the footnote says your true desire is to do the right thing, it does not mean your ego self secretly wants to be good. It means your mind is actually already oriented toward truth. So when behavior follows truth, it's experienced as right. You always know it's right because it follows truth. The form doesn't matter. The will itself, this will is pre-behavior. So it might help to frame it this way instead of my true will is to do the right thing, my true will is to see truly, because right action follows from that automatically. So the goal needs to be to see truly. To see truly is to recognize the truth of who you are instead of identifying with what the ego is telling you that you are, that things mean and all that. Everything is a means for you seeing the truth of who you are, recognizing, coming back to recognizing your benevolent essence. Another way to say it is my true will is peace. Behavior reorganizes around that. My behavior reorganizes around that. So any behavior that you don't like about yourself, for one, it didn't happen, it didn't even happen. If you find yourself apologizing for it, that's fine. That didn't happen either, right? So in recognizing that and being happy that you see that this behavior is not wanted behavior, what does it mean? Remember what it means? It means that pre-behavior you were confused about what your will is. So see how if you try to fix from the behavior level, you're never gonna be successful. Because that's not where it's coming. It's coming from you misidentifying what your will is. Okay, that behavior reorganize around your true will. So if this true will were about action, then conflict would be real. Some more effort would be required. Discipline would be primary. That's what the world does, right? We even got jails, right? It's like we're gonna rehabilitate you with discipline for your actions, right? Really, when you perceive even killing or something like that, that's actually an effect of thinking in the direction of the ego. This person needs rehabilitation, as in like their mind being healed, right? So that's the that's the thing. And it seems to me, uh, you know, just talking to a couple people in prison, seems to me, even prison is going into that direction. Where it's like, let's take care of these people's minds.
SPEAKER_02:In like in like Holland, uh Finland, Holland, somewhere over there. Um, that's that's the way they've been doing it for years. So like, oh, you you work somebody, you're you're not well. It's not like killing you. You're not okay, you're not okay. And they even like talking to me about it. And the the host was like talking to me, was like, you're in the kitchen, you're gonna you know you have all these knives and flames, like, and you're not this is okay. And then like, oh yeah, I was just like really screwed up on the inside. Like, now I'm just like cook for my fellow inmates.
SPEAKER_07:Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_02:And it's just so mind-blowing to see that different perspective change.
SPEAKER_06:Yeah, no one's broken.
SPEAKER_02:I was not okay. It's really screwed up.
SPEAKER_00:And the thing is that the system actually works. Implementing it has proven that it actually works.
SPEAKER_06:Yeah, so they're talking about uh the in the room in the room, people are talking about a system that works where um what they're doing is looking at the person, if they're a murderer or whatever, as being sick and needing help, right? And it is, it's like sick behavior comes from a sick mind, and that's and your mind really isn't capable of being sick, but believing it makes it so for you. That's the thing. So it's changing the way the mind is seeing these things so they could just be healed in an instant. Okay, so Jesus is saying that conflict is illusory. That's why there's no more behavior, will conflict when you're listening to the truth, when you're listening to the guidance that comes with ease. Strain comes from misidentification, clarity resolves it. So behavior, will conflict is really thought, thought, conflict between ego interpretation and true perception. And that's no real conflict, is it? Because ego interpretation is based on untruth. There's no real conflict. So true will is not trying to do better. That's the worldly way, right? I'll maybe I'll do better next time. It's not trying to force yourself into thinking rightly or overcoming any resistance. Okay. This is your true will is your mind's steady inclination toward what's true. And you can you feel it when I'm telling you that this is true, that your mind is benevolent, that you actually cannot will against yourself, but you can believe that you have and make that real for yourself. See what I'm saying? So true will is also the willingness to let your perception be corrected. I must be seeing it wrong. If you're getting an upset feeling, you are seeing it wrongly. That's all that means. You haven't done anything wrong. You just need a correction in your mind. You need to remember that peace is all you want. You can think of action being downstream from that. Okay. All right. So true will is not what you do, it's the direction in which your mind rests. It either rests at ease or it goes the other direction, and it's a lot of dis-ease.
SPEAKER_03:All right. I think we flushed that sentence out pretty well.
SPEAKER_06:Let's just read the sentence one more time. Yeah. Let's read the sentence one more time. It was definitely rich.
SPEAKER_03:Let me see where we are. Oh, here it is.
SPEAKER_06:It is thus impossible to avoid behavior will conflict as defined before, because even if you acted according to will, you wouldn't know it. Does that sentence make a lot more sense now?
SPEAKER_02:This is kind of what I'm saying. Like I'll hear this blurb or experience this thing in life, or read a whole freaking book on psychology. I'm like, this is insane. Like it doesn't, it doesn't make sense. It sounds insane.
SPEAKER_01:And then I'll be shown. And then everything will make sense, and it just fits right into my life.
SPEAKER_02:Like two thirds of what you said, I've already like experienced or in my relationship. And I'll do those things naturally. I just don't I can't articulate and know there's a whole book on it. I'm just very like both naive and experience, and I just try to do the right thing and be loving. And this is like explain explaining both loads of things. So many, so many people I know who like try to do this. And I assume they learned that at church. And they're you know growing up religious, and so I have a lot more context for what this means now. Good. I just wish I could articulate better.
SPEAKER_06:Okay, I'm glad we came to that. So so what Romy is sharing is like as I'm speaking, a lot of the things that are coming up, he's saying, Man, I already do that stuff. Like I notice I'm I'm doing that. Uh, but I notice, you know, a lot of people aren't doing it. Is that is that right? Is that about right?
SPEAKER_02:Uh it's it's their like like my friend Brad, 44. He's like, he said he's like just getting to the point where he just feels really peaceful and and cooperative and everything. And he's like, and you just do that naturally, and like I don't know anything else.
SPEAKER_06:Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_02:So Romy does I I almost feel like I've been missing how um or I have it because I'm just doing it. But you know, people go to like church or CSL for this stuff, and I'm like, they're all just like me. I just didn't have people like you to articulate that from an early age. It's the lack of all the distractions and the negative that let me just do that.
SPEAKER_06:Okay, so he's he's saying uh a lot of a lot of what I'm talking about here is stuff that he automatically does, he naturally does it, and people are trying to get to this point. You know, everyone's got different conditioning, not only just in this lifetime, but actually what you're bringing forward, right? Anything that you've any learning that you've accomplished in any lifetime is automatically brought forward. So he had apparently this uh awesome childhood that gave him not all the same conditioning that people get. It was a lot gentler. And so it's just natural for him. And he's saying he wishes he can articulate how it is better. Okay, so that's actually the ego uh wishing for something to be different. You know, if you find yourself not articulating it, uh, you don't need to because what is going on? Yeah, what's what's going on is your example that people are really learning from, not how well you can articulate. You can say, like, for someone like me, I'm being used so that this could be articulated, but that's not better or worse than someone not articulating it, right? There's also um plenty of masters who are helping so many people. No one ever heard from them. No one ever heard a word, right? So it's not better or worse to be particular, you know, articulate. And then also, I don't have a preference about it. Tomorrow I could be quiet for the rest of this lifetime. I don't care.
SPEAKER_07:Right?
SPEAKER_06:I don't have a preference about it. It's just a matter of if you're if you're following the guidance that's being always being laid out for you, you always know that whatever you seem to be doing is on purpose, but it doesn't become your personal purpose. Like I gotta keep doing this now because it started, right? And so it's allowing yourself to be used and stop being used in that way as soon as that moment arises, right? Yay, I love you. Thank you for joining, my sweeties. You're above the angels, you're above the angels, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:Paragraph four, you guys.
SPEAKER_06:We made it. Paragraph four. Woo! Chapter three, paragraph four. Uh by the way, I've been doing a course in miracles like this with the deep dive since about February this year. This is how far we've made it. No, I don't remember the exact day, but it'll show on the recordings. It's a I always put the date on the recording. It was like Haley was doing Haley was doing them, and then she went on a month break.
SPEAKER_05:Okay, I'll take over.
SPEAKER_06:I took over and then I never stopped taking over. All right. Apparently. Um, Haley has a Haley has a way of doing it that's awesome too. It's not going as deep, it's kind of like going a little bit faster. I like to do it like this, and then people who like it like this, they just jump on my bandwagon. Yeah. All right, paragraph four, sentence one. The next part of this course rests too heavily on the early earlier part not to require its study. Okay, you guys, that's what just came up here. The next part of this course rests too heavily on the earlier part not to require its study. So for you to get a working idea of what he's actually saying, he's saying you got to study what came before. And this section is called uh the same perception and the need to study. The first section of this chapter is called the need to study. The whole chapter is called the sane perception, sane perception, something like that. There's a footnote on this sentence. And the footnote is this is the content we are being asked to study here in our study periods. We are being asked to review, quote, the earlier part, i.e., the course up until this point. Jesus later refers to these study periods as reviewing the notes. And then it says, see cameo 14. For those of you guys who aren't familiar with cameos, cameos are conversation Jesus was having kind of in private with Helen Shushman, the channeler, and Bill, her assistant, uh, both psychologists. And he was having conversations with them about their own life. It fits really well into this section, and we are gonna get to cameo 14. Will we start it today? Maybe. We'll see how it goes. So those cameos are in the back of the book. We're just gonna go to the back of the book. We're gonna go over the cameo so you can see in a practical situation where Jesus is using these events to teach, and it's very helpful. So we'll get be getting to that as well. So, right here, this is Jesus is making a transition right here in a course in miracles. Okay, he's not introducing new material independent of what came before. It's not independent of what came before. What came before has been a foundation. So he's saying you need to study. Go back and review the rest of a course in miracles and then come back to this. These aren't like hard and fast rules that. You have to follow. Okay. This is the just dictation that occurred. If you seem to go ahead and read that part, that's fine. And then when you feel inspired to go back and study the beginning again, that's fine. Where do I get all this from? I have studied a course in miracles for many years, including doing all the lessons four and a half times now. So that's why I know I can read between lines. I've been putting it all together for a while.
unknown:Okay.
SPEAKER_06:And those four and a half times doing the last time, uh, the last time doing it was doing it for the podcast, which it's all done now. Okay. So so that's why I know that even though he's talking like that, this is not a rule to where if you perceive yourself going, fuck that, I'm not looking back there, I'm going ahead. He's not shaking his head and you go, you fucking idiot. I told you just not to do that. You know, he you know, he even says in another section, here's the uh blueprint I'm giving you for following a course in miracles. Uh, this is, but if you feel inspired to do it a different way, go with that because we don't want to be studying under strain. This is important. We don't want to be studying under strain, right? So let yourself be inspired however you're inspired. If you hear this right now and go, okay, I'm gonna go back and I'm gonna listen to all those ACIM deep dives that Hope did since February to now, so I can get caught up. They're two hours each time. Right. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Now I have something that will that's right.
SPEAKER_06:And it starts with the first principle of miracles, chapter one is principles of miracles. There's 50 of them. A great time. Jesus gets all into sex in that one, too. Which yeah, it's it's good. It it's it's good. It really like clarifies our ideas uh and sticking points like that. Okay. Uh, so here's a here's a transition happening here. He's saying that this is uh this is this material needs to have a foundation. So the next phase, like how well you perceive the next phase of this teaching, and not through the ego's interpretation, depends on a clear grasp on what's already been laid as a foundation. Okay, you guys will probably be fine if you come here though, and I'm doing it, right? Because I'll be explaining it to you all along.
SPEAKER_05:Refer back to that and everything. Well, I think it could be points us out because um, I remember like when I was reading the blue book, there's sort of the momentum that starts to happen. You get rolling with it, you're just like you start feeling so good from finally reading something that's the truth. And so you just want to keep pushing, pushing forward in the book. Yeah, sort of like the momentum. And so yeah, it's like yeah, we'll pause and really take in what was the first half chapters.
SPEAKER_06:Yes, this is something to help halt that kind of momentum to accomplish, accomplish it, right? Because it's not how fast you go. I did a course in miracles four and a half times, but I've been studying for 11 years. Okay, so it's not about how fast you go. That's what I noticed when I first started. I just wanted to like consume it.
unknown:Right.
SPEAKER_06:I go as fast as I can. I was reading the text and doing the lessons at the same time, and I just wanted to consume it. Then I started to slow down with it because it's not a matter of how many times or how much you do it. It's like, are you in an open state in a way where you have a foundation set and you can understand this stuff that as it's being presented? So Jesus is saying that uh, well, he's saying rest too heavily in there. He's saying the next part of this course rest too heavily on the earlier part not to require its study. So the later material is assuming understanding now. Like I said, if you're taking this with me and you're coming in and you're uh either you're coming here in person or you're listening to it later, you're doing it online, whatever, you're probably gonna get a pretty good understanding, whether you're just starting right now or not. Remember, this isn't specifically aimed at you. This is uh a general uh a general understanding of how this works. It's like if you don't have that foundation, you're not gonna get this, right? You can always go back if you feel like I want to go back and do all that stuff and read all of that stuff so I can get a really uh good grasp. You can always ask me in here too. So um, you don't have to take it as you have to absolutely have to do that. So the later material is assuming a certain kind of understanding. It's not intellectual mastery, though. And look at what we've been covering up till now. See, we've been we've been covering like in chapter two, we're covering uh level confusion. Level confusion was very much covered. We're putting truth and illusion on the same level where they could be in conflict. They do not belong on the same level. Illusion is is on one level, truth is way above it. And when you and when you rely on the truth, that's how you see past it. But when you believe they're on the same level, truth and illusion, you can't see past that. You know, and up to this point where we are right now, we've been talking about how whenever you perceive something that seems to be your own voice against your will, saying that you're like this or like that, recognizing that that's not who you are. So this is a kind of foundation we're looking at. This isn't intellectual mastery, but it's clarity about these concepts and the orientation of them in your mind. So this is why Jesus is emphasizing study periods. If you haven't been studying up to now, you may take this as okay, I'm gonna make study periods in addition to what I'm learning with hope through the podcast or in person or anything like that. I'm just gonna go back to the beginning. You guys, it's easy to do. Go back to my first ACIM deep dive. It's there on my website uh under free resources. It's uh on all the read all the podcast channels. Go back to that first one. Two hours you can take, two hours a week. You can keep up with me and go back and do that at the same time or whatever resonates for you. So the footnote is clarifying that the earlier part of this course, up into up into the point, up to up into this point, that the study periods that you're doing are specifically for reviewing what already occurred. Okay, so you might even do those first three or those first two um chapters, plus all the way up to what sentence are we on here? All the way up to uh paragraph four of chapter three, part one of chapter three. You might even just go back and read all of that stuff again, and you might go back over it several times since he's saying it's a foundation. So study doesn't mean memorizing, it means reviewing, re-seeing your aha. Oh, that's what he's saying. Okay, and letting that be really clear, letting meaning consolidate in your mind, letting earlier ideas settle into you some coherence for you. That's another thing Romy was just bringing up about seeing these things that I'm talking about before. But when he saw them before, he couldn't really uh wrap his mind about them and integrate them like he can now. And when he hears them again, it's gonna be even better like that. That's why Jesus is saying to go back and review it because you're revisiting it. It might be something you go back and review often. Who knows? The footnote is also clarifying that the earlier part is up, is the course in mirror a course in miracles up to this very point. These are what is these are the study materials that are specifically for review. Jesus himself later later names this activity as reviewing the notes. So he's talking to Helen and Bill. He's telling them to review the notes and then come back and and let's let's do some more. So reviewing is not repetition, like when you go to school, they just want you to repeat, repeat, repeat so you can be a robot employee, right? It's not like that. It's not for reper repetition for disciplining your mind, it's actually for integration. It's not some meaningless exercise. It allows some of these scattered insights to become unified in their in their framework when you can when you're looking at it and like for the second or third or fifth time. So without this review, the later teachings, the teaching, the teachings that are coming might feel abstract or you know, like disconnected from anything and feeling metaphysical, too metaphysical, or they could be misapplied at the level of behavior or morality if you don't understand what's going on so far. So he's trying to prevent this misunderstanding by saying, don't move forward without clarity. If you do, you're gonna build confusion. Don't skip integrating what's gone before in this text. We've been exploring. Confusion comes from misunderstanding the mind. It's misunderstanding that it's a benevolent mind, totally for extending love and nothing else. Clarity comes from careful attention to that. Paying careful attention. See, it's like when you immediately hear it, you could feel it, it's the truth. But when you hear it again and it's coming in a different way, maybe, then you're like, Oh, I can look past that too. See, can you can you say it again for me? It's like, oh, I can look past that too. That thought. The quote that you said right before that. The quote I don't know what is it? What did it involve?
SPEAKER_00:You said right before that shoot, sorry.
SPEAKER_06:It's okay. So attention, your attention is a form of willingness, it's not something to strain about. And of course, in miracles, is it works up, it's cumulative by design. No, you start from the beginning, you get that, get some more, get some more. And Jesus also says, if you want to just start anywhere, go ahead, just start somewhere. He's just saying, this is the most efficient. So we're letting what we've learned become stable through this and letting our understanding of what's what this is saying to deepen so that what follows can really be heard as it's intended to be heard. So Jesus isn't asking us to go faster, he's actually asking us to see more clearly. I love you. Thank you, my love. Thanks for joining. It's so fun.
SPEAKER_05:What I like about the later chapters is a lot of a lot of the information, it's almost like a regurgitation, but it's uh just more uh poetic and the way they're um just more images of like things that we can sort of relate to on an archetypical level, like like the concept of like, oh, here's a mirror, and here's a picture frame, and here's a prison, and here's a killer, and the garden, and so as it advances, it's like it's just putting in more like archetypical imagery that kind of I think helps maybe wherever you're whatever you're uh experiencing in your life. You can there will be something that'll jump out, and you'll be like, Oh yeah, I can relate to that.
SPEAKER_06:Yeah. So uh what Natalie is sharing that uh that she's saying that a course in miracles gives more imagery and examples, and you could see uh how this can be used. So you can see more how this could be used in all kinds of uh really any dynamic, any scenario. And you know, it it's actually building on itself. I've heard someone say in a course in miracles uh reading, uh she was she was like, Yeah, Jesus is just saying the same thing again, and it's like that's not how it is, he's not none of those words are out of place, right? He he's pointing to the same truth again and again, but you know, if you look at it like, oh, I already know that, and you're not, and you know, it's in that kind of uh vein, like it's you're not you're not back to perfect peace. It's kind of like this sense, like I already know that, and I'm still like this, right? It's like no, open up to what's being shared there because it's way deeper than the ego would make it out. So we have about 25 minutes left, and we have a cameo to do, so I'm just gonna take a break right here and go over to the cameo right now, cameo 14. Yeah, let's read a cameo. Cameo 14. That's towards the back of the book. If you're in the book, that's page 1765. I don't know. All right, this cameo is called The Chain of Miscreation. Yeah, it's great, and so this is gonna talk about what we've been going over. This is gonna give some good examples about this. At the beginning of what is now chapter three of the text, Jesus gave Helen and Bill an assignment to review the earlier part of the course. The notes Helen had scribed up to this point as preparation for the next part. Okay, the next part is uh right here where we're at in the text. However, it seems that on the appointed day, the planned study period did not happen. You know, he's talking about the need to study. It's coming out of these events, these transactions that are going on. Instead, little bits of resentment and conflict added up over the course of the day and led to wasted time and to the day ending with the two of them upset with each other. That's Helen and Bill. So Jesus decided to give them a lengthy discourse on how this happened, how their errors had ultimately interfered with their review period. As Helen then dictated this material into the Urtext, it was filled out with more material. Our transcript below will be a combination of both the notes and the UR text. So she's taking this stuff down. And so the people who are compiling this are talking now. They're combining what was found in the Urtext and the notes to come up with this cameo to explain what's going on, like where this information that ended up being chapter three originated from. Isn't that fun? We get to see behind the scenes. All right, including this one paragraph introduction. Okay, this is a combination of both the notes, her notes, and what's called her text. The following is the only detailed description which need be written down as to how error interferes with preparation. Jesus had characterized their review as preparation. The events specifically referred to here could be any events, nor does their particular influence matter. It is the process which is to be noted here and not its results. The kind of beliefs and the fallacious premises involved in misthought are as well exemplified here as elsewhere. He's going to show us. There is nothing of special interest about the events described below, except their typical nature. If this is a true course in mind training, then the whole value of this section rests only in showing you what not to do. So Jesus is basically going to show us what not to do by example here. The more constructive emphasis is, of course, on the positive approach. What to do? Okay. Mind watching would have prevented any of this from occurring and will do so anytime you permit it to. So that's what he's talking about. Mind watching, right? That's what it's like. This unwatched, unconscious mind seems to make things go awry because it's not being watched. Okay, now this is back to the ones who compiled this version of A Course in Miracles. They're saying this introduction carefully frames the following discourse. It's not a scolding about these particular events and their negative results. Rather, it is only about what can be learned from the entirely typical process they represent. Yet even then, the discourse's focus on what not to do is less constructive than a more positive emphasis on mind watching. That's what to do, mind watching. And so Jesus says, this is the Only time he is going to give such a discourse. Now the discourse begins. Aren't you glad you're here for this? So yeah. And then and it's yeah, I'm not scolding, yeah, I'm not scolding you. And it's more effective to uh focus on what you should do, which is mind watching. So this is the only time I'm going to give this kind of discourse on what you should not do. Isn't that awesome? This is recorded too. So all right, here's where it starts. Tell Bill, this is Helen's associate, tell Bill that the reason why he was so strained today is because he allowed himself a number of fear-producing attitudes. They were fleeting enough to be more will-o wisps. This is something Jesus plays around with Bill all the time. He's saying, Will W-I-L-L-O-Wisps, W-I-S-P-S. He's saying they were fleeting, they were fleeting enough to be more will-o wisps than serious will errors. But unless he watches this kind of thing, he will find the notes fearful. So unless he watches these will, he's saying they're less than serious will errors because they're more like they're fleeting. They're like will-o wisps, he says. Uh, and unless he watches this kind of thing, he's gonna find these notes fearful. And Jesus says, knowing him well will misdistantiate. Okay, misdistantiate. We went over that earlier. Distantiate is to make distance. So to misdistantiate is to make distance from the truth. That's not what you want to make distance from. You want to make distance from ego lies, okay? You want to you want to see that those are not associated with you at all. So his meaning Bill's unprovoked irritation was unpardonable except by himself. See that, and he did not choose to pardon it. Good, right? You're the only one who can be pardoning it, no one else can do it for you. And then Jesus says, You did. He's talking to Helen here. Helen is the you, she's the one channeling. You did, but I'm afraid you were under some strain in doing so. So, what are you saying? What did she do? She pardoned uh this unpardonable irritation for Bill because he wasn't pardoning it. So you say Jesus is saying, You did, but I'm afraid you were under some strain in doing so. This was unfortunate and weakened your own ability to behave healingly toward Bill at the time. Remember, we're talking about strain, right? So this is where strain is coming in. Where's where's strain coming in again? It's because she doesn't recognize her own will. She can't recognize her own will. That's where the strain is, right? So so he's saying it weakened her ability to behave healingly toward Bill at the time, and later also toward Lewis, both of whom Jesus is saying did act stupidly. So he's saying, even though they acted stupidly, you didn't have to weaken your abilities. All right, he's saying, but one stupidity at a time is usually enough. You are getting too close to the misuse of mental retardation when stupidity sets in all around. You like how Jesus puts it straight?
unknown:Okay.
SPEAKER_06:Remember, it's the 60s, so mental retardation is totally something that's accepted in the way they talk.
SPEAKER_00:And it's a more blanket term.
SPEAKER_06:Yeah, and then they're psychologists. So this is something that they they know. Uh since then, it's become a little bit politically incorrect. Uh, it's uh it's uh what's what is it called? Uh cognitive limitation or something like that. Cognizant limitation, I think. All right. Uh so now here comes these compilers of this material again. They're saying, this is their commentary. Here we see the beginning of what Jesus will later call, quote, the chain of miscreation. We are going to see a lot more on that in a course in miracles, the chain of miscreation, in which an initial error leads to a whole chain of further errors. The fear-producing attitudes Bill entertains cause him strain. If unchecked, this kind of thing will lead him to fear the course and therefore wrongly distance himself from it. That's what Jesus is calling misdistantiate. So you're distancing yourself from the true teaching. Apparently, Bill's strain also contributed on this day to quote unprovoked irritation, end quote. Bill could have pardoned himself for this quote unpardonable offense, but he didn't. Helen did, but only under strain, which then made her too weak to respond kindly to Bill's quote stupidity and Lewis's too. Both of which she thereby compounded with her own stupidity. In using the word, quote, stupidity, Jesus may simply be referencing Helen's thoughts just as he is almost certainly doing with the word, quote, unpardonable. That Jesus doesn't really mean unpardonable is shown by the fact that Bill was supposed to have pardoned his error, and Helen rightly did. So Helen pardoned his error for him. All right. So now here's Jesus again in the notes. Bill, having already weakened himself, was very unmiracle-minded. First, by not asking Dora if she wanted a lift in the cab. We're just getting this information right now. There's no previous story to tie it to or anything, but we're going to see what he's talking about. So Bill having, and this is Jesus again. Bill having already weakened himself was very unmiracle-minded first by not asking Dora if she wanted a lift in the cab, which was going her way. Even if she didn't want it, she would have been able to use the thought well. So that was the guidance that was being given. Bill wasn't listening. And here, Jesus continues there is probably no human error that is more fear-provoking in the will behavior conflict sense than countering any form of error with error. Right? No, nothing more fear-provoking. The result can be highly inflammable. By reacting to Dora's stupidity with his own, all of the elements with which are virtually certain to engender fear have been provided.
SPEAKER_04:Welcome to Facebook.
SPEAKER_06:Welcome to Facebook. Yes. Bill should note that this is one of the few times that he had to wait for a cab. This is Jesus talking again. He thought he took care of it by holding the door of a cab, which did come for that lady, but he was misguided in this belief. Beliefs are thoughts and thus come under Christ's guidance, not control. All right. So they're saying beliefs are thoughts and then thus come under Christ's guidance. See, Jesus is saying he was misguided in this belief. So we want all of our beliefs and all of our thoughts to come under Christ's guidance. And Jesus says, actually, by giving this cab to her, he was very unkind to you, Helen. Okay. It was quite apparent that you were extremely cold and also very late. The idea that giving her the cab would atone for his previous errors was singularly out of place. So let me just let you see how this happens. He perceived that he was acting stupid, let's say. And he wanted to make up for it. This is so common. So ego mind controlling says, here's how you make up for it. Give this cab to this person. And see, he's also with Helen, who's cold and late and needs a cab, but he's not listening because he's trying to atone for an error in his own way. See that? I'll make up for it by doing this. This also reminds me of where you're buying something online and they ship it to you, and you could pay a dollar to atone for it by having them plant a tree. Offset it. That's some good stuff. So the idea that giving her the cab would atone for his previous errors was singularly out of place and well calculated to lead to further error. If instead of attempting to atone on his own, he had asked for guidance, there would have been no difficulty whatsoever in the cab situation. It was not necessary necessary that anyone wait at all. So it's like it threw a monkey wrench in the situation and made waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting. Yeah. Even time is saved when we're listening to guidance. Say that. His, meaning Bill's original slight to Dora because of his own need to get home as he perceived it, stopped him from benefiting from the time-saving device of the miracle. He would have gotten home much quicker if he had taken time to use time properly. So now here come the organizers again to comment on this. To reconstruct the above, Dora did something that is called here an act of quote stupidity. Bill then responded to her error with an error of his own. He didn't offer to let Dora share the cab that he and Helen were waiting for because of his perceived need to get home quicker. So he didn't offer this woman a cab. That was that's what the guidance was to offer her to ride with him and Helen, this woman, Dora. Uh, but he instead of doing that, he gave the cab to a completely different person, and everyone had to wait a really long time. And that was supposedly to atone by some stupidity he was doing earlier. He didn't offer to let Dora share the cab that he and Helen were waiting for because of his perceived need to get home quicker. But countering her error with his own, see, he's Jesus is saying she acted stupid, but that doesn't mean it was time for you to start acting stupid. Isn't that what we do a lot? Right? We still want to be in listening. So it led, that's why it led to the exact opposite result. It didn't save time and made uh uh Helen cold, and people had to, everyone had to wait for an unusually long time for a cab. Had he offered Dora a lift, he would have given her a miracle, just that act of kindness. See, they're involuntary. That's why you're listening in the moment. You're not trying to control the miracle. See? Yep. It because it would have been an act of kindness, even if she didn't accept the ride that he just offered her to ride in the cab with them. That would have been the most efficient, too. This would this would then have invoked the time-saving property of miracles, which would have summoned a cab more quickly. Sensing his mistake, he tried to quote, a tone on his own, end quote, by graciously giving away to another woman the cab that did come. Uh-huh. Isn't that good? But this was simultaneously a quote, well-calculated unkindness to Helen, who was clearly extremely cold and also very late. Now, without the miracle to save them time, they had to wait. Here then, we have a continuation of the chain of errors, which incorporates Dora's error, error, and stretches onward to impact Helen. Here's Jesus again. You were still suffering from strain, see above, and got quite irritated at the girl. Now they're bringing another, Jesus is bringing another example in about a girl that Helen interacted interacted with. You got quite irritated at the girl who stood next to the door on the side which blocked its opening. Her presence there made it necessary each time the door was open to hold it for a much longer time than was necessary. And you were angry because this made you cold. Actually, the girl was taking care of the younger child who was standing outside. And both of them were really mentally retarded. If you will remember, the older girl asked you very uncertainly about the bus. And you were well aware at the time of her extreme uncertainty. It would have been much wiser had you built up her confidence instead of associating with her stupidity. So here's them talking about this, commenting on what Jesus was just saying here. Helen's lingering strain from forgiving Bill. We're going back to that. Her lingering strain from forgiving Bill then spilled over into irritation. Remember this strain thing, right? Her forgiveness of Bill was her true will. But she was identified with an imposter will that made it seem like that wasn't her true will to be in a forgiving mindset toward Bill. And that's what introduced the strain. That's what we just went over. Helen's lingering strain from forgiving Bill then spilled over into irritation at a girl whose position near the door required it to be repeatedly held open a long time, making Helen cold. However, Helen had noticed how extremely uncertain the girl was. And being a specialist in mental retardation in children, she should have put two and two together. This is the commentary. Now, Jesus is not saying she should have done anything. She should have put two and two together and realized the girl was really mentally retarded. Then she could have given her a miracle by building up her confidence instead of instead through Helen's surprisingly dense irritation, she joined the girl in retardation. Okay. I'm going to stop there because it's 4:59 on New Year's Eve. Woohoo! What we're gonna come back again. Um wow, I think I'm gonna take a screenshot of this so I know where I am in the text, and so we'll know we're kind of into cameo 14, and these don't have sentence numbers like everyone, everywhere else. So I'm gonna use a page number and a screenshot to know where I left off. Uh, we're coming back into cameo 14 next week, again on Wednesday. We'll be in uh an apparent new year, although nothing really changes. Uh, you can say, you know why nothing changes? Because you're the light of the world that can't change. And everything that you're perceiving is changeful, and it'll continue to change for the quote better, right? What is better? It's reflective of the truth that you are, God's will for you for perfect happiness. All right. I'll be back first on Sunday to give wisdom dialogues. Okay, that's a stream of consciousness that I share with you, just listening and speaking. I'll be back uh Sunday, this coming Sunday, three to five Pacific time again. Same link if you join me on Zoom, if you're following me on Substack, that's where I'll be. If you listen later, great. Same place. Yay, I love you. Thank you. Thank you so much. Go to hopejohnson.org to find all of my free resources. Also, I got paid stuff on there. Also, I accept donations there, all kinds of donations. Like if you want to give uh give money donations, that's a great place. Hopejohnson.org. If you have another way you would like to assist my ministry, by the way, it's a nonprofit uh religious ministry. So the taxes uh uh the the tax-deductible donation should work for you. This is the last day of the year. Maybe you want to get one of those in. I don't know. Uh, but yes, thank you. All right, let's see what we have here. Oh, thank you, Acahi. Thanks. I love you. Happy New Year's Eve. I appreciate you, Glenn. Thank you, Glenn. Guidance dissolves into presents, as in Christmas presents, huh? The paths, the path dissolves into home. Hooray. Oh, yeah. Uh, you've been listening to my ACIM lessons, haven't you? That sounds familiar. Uh Durga, with so uh with so love, anything is possible. Yay! Yes, it's true. Yes, it's true. I love you. Okay, everyone. Until next. Next time, Mahalo, Aloha, and Ahoo.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah.