The Brave Podcast

She Trusted God with Sandi Querin

October 14, 2020 Season 1 Episode 41
The Brave Podcast
She Trusted God with Sandi Querin
Show Notes Transcript

In this episode of The Brave Podcast, we get to hang out with another one of my favorite people, my pastor, Sandi Querin. She is an Ordained Minister and holds degrees in law and business. She is the founder of Abba’s Heart Ministries, which is the sponsoring non-profit organization for the RC, and shepherds the work at the Revival Center with her husband, Martin. She was supernaturally healed of Cystic Fibrosis and many complications from the disease, including emphysema and bronchioccasis in 1998. She has been actively operating in the gifts of God since she was 12 years old and travels the world sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ.

In this episode, we discuss:

  • Gifting/ Anointing
  • Healing
  • Trusting God
  • Healing
  • Fear

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Sandi Interview - 7_24_20, 1.38 PM

Alexis Newlin: [00:00:00] . [00:00:00] All right. So this is the brave podcast and I am your host, Alexis Newland. And I have today with me, pastor Sandy Corinne. She's my pastors, the revival center. And we're gonna share her story with you guys today. All right, Sandy. So introduce yourself and tell people why you're awesome.

Sandi Querin: [00:00:18] Oh, what did I tell my husband? Why am I awesome? well of course we're awesome because Christ is in us and beyond Christ in us. We recognize that we're in him or hidden in him. And so what am I? I'm 62. And so when I was nine, I felt the Lord told me that I would preach. And so I just started getting up in the middle of the night and, you know, reading the Bible.

I didn't know what else to do. And it just became full of the word. You know, I set my alarm and read and then go do the chicken thing. And the cow thing would have been a farm. Yeah. You know, I just spent my childhood doing that and I had cystic fibrosis and the more I started pursuing God, the sicker I got [00:01:00] and, you know, , we were in a church that didn't believe in the moving the Holy spirit.

And then we oops. Yeah, we've got the Holy spirit, so into a church then that did relieve and they were wild, crazy hanging from chandelier type people. And so my parents said, yeah, probably not. We need to get like a, more of a balance. And so we found this other place that ended up being our home church forever and we loved it.

We grew up, it was a little, Filipino mission church. Oh, yeah, we were the only white guys, mostly. I mean, there was probably, I don't know, like a couple dozen other white guys, but it was mainly Filipinos. and, and, yeah, so we had every color of the spectrum. You know, in, in this church and, and it was great.

And the Filipino people, they know how to pray. They know how to Terri. And so if you, if you wanted prayer or you just had to get prepared , to get handled pretty much, you know, there's an old story about Smith Wigglesworth, where he just [00:02:00] was overcome with the fire of God, the power of God and his gifting was a little bizarre and quirky, and he would get mad at cancer, especially.

Yeah. And if somebody said they had cancer, he'd just come after him and he'd grab them and shake them and sometimes he'd punch him and he was very aggressive. 

Yeah. Yeah

Alexis Newlin: [00:02:17] . Wow. 

Sandi Querin: [00:02:18] Weird. Just really weird. Yeah. So he, yeah. Yeah, but it was God and it was, it was unusual. Yeah, the unique unto him. And so, there was a guy story, has it, that was waiting in his long line for prayer and the guy gets out of the line to prayer.

And one of the officers says, well, no, no, he won't be that long. You know, come stand in line. And the guy goes, forget it. I just have a headache that was kind of 

. We're out. Like. And I don't think, I don't think I want a lot kind of stuff. but it, it became, a very gentle to our hearts, peaceful and beautiful, but the [00:03:00] Filipino people, and I've recently gone back to missions trips, you know, to the Philippines. And they're the same way they're dynamic and wonderful in every way.

But when they latch a permeating onto you, buddy, you've been prayed for, they will pray for you and how and scream over you for hours. And I'm like, Oh, I did now my headaches worse. Cause you're screaming at me, you know, but they, they love the Lord. And I learned how to Terry from those people, I learned how to hang in there and, and don't stop until the answer comes and persevere and I was sickly.

And then the Holy spirit, you know, came on me then this goofy, prophetic thing, I couldn't stop it. I was a kid. I was 12. I didn't know. And I'm grabbing people and speaking to him and things are happening and the power God's moving and I'm just a kid. All I was was one thing. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:03:57] Did he ever questioned any of this?

You just kind of 

Sandi Querin: [00:03:59] went with it [00:04:00] because I, I only had one thing. I was full of the word of God and that. Made me willing if you're not full of the word of God and you want to try that move and do some God thing, you're kidding yourself because it will be mostly you, or you can learn it from some stupid school of the prophets or some goofy school somewhere, and some man's gonna teach you.

And the Bible says, don't do that. And so I just wanted Jesus. I mean, I got saved. Because I wanted a friend, you know, the preacher said who, why I have a friend who wants to meet my friend? I'm like, my friend sounds great. I, you know, I was a little kid. I was three years old. Yeah. Oh yeah. Friend. That's cool.

So I went up and Jesus was my friend. And to this day, all these years, almost 60 years later, That is the fundamental foundation of my work, the relationship with Christ. He's your friend. He's my friend. Now I would [00:05:00] find out that I was a sinner. I needed a savior and that me was the King of the world. And I would find that out and I would enjoy that and love that and respect that and respond to that.

But mainly it was my friend. And that's why when we take who we are and who Christ is. To a place that's not right. you know, it's not good for your friend and people misunderstand that when they do stupid stuff, they're taking their dearest best friend with them. Did that wicked, 

Alexis Newlin: [00:05:33] he doesn't leave. Like, just let you go on your own.

He's right there next to you. Yeah, no, 

Sandi Querin: [00:05:38] I had a, I had a Sunday school teacher for one year and I taught little kids when I was, I think, 10, between 10 and 11. And then I just needed to be in church. And so I, you know, I had a Sunday school teacher, like I taught the kids for a year and then I had a teacher for a year.

And then I was in church after I got the Holy [00:06:00] ghost. And that Sunday school teacher told me, and I, I loved having a teacher, you know, I loved it. she said, you know, don't go anywhere where Jesus can't go, you know? And I always remembered that. And then. One day I was in a situation. It was like, it was at going to a church meeting and dumb people were doing dumb stuff and a meeting next to the church.

And I had a vision of the Lord in there, weeping and it broke my heart and I thought, well, what are you doing in there? You know? Yeah. Like that lots of dumb you're Jesus. What are you hanging out with those goofballs for. And the Lord told me I'll never leave him. I'll never forget, but he had to hang out with these idiots and I, I, I'm an idiot half the time everybody is.

I [00:07:00] mean, we're an idiot on accident. And I just think I shouldn't try to be one on purpose cause my averages get bad then. So we up thinking at least I gotta make an effort on the non idiot zone. So I'm trying, but you know, let's face it. So I learned from that, that the Lord actually hangs with you when you're watching a bad movie, you're, you're making the King of glory.

Watch that filth. What is wrong with you? And of course that's my, the, the pole of my life is to destroy compromise in the church because Christ died for that church and it belongs to Christ. And that's the, the pole of my heart because he's my friend. Yeah. I don't want to protect my friend. Now Jesus doesn't need a babysitter.

And I don't who I think I am, but nevertheless, it's there. I just have this pull, like let's make Jesus safe. Let's create a safe spot so that we are [00:08:00] not consumed with praising God, but we're willing to go into worship and he can take us where he is and we can know him in spirit and truth. That's when Jesus is in charge.

That's when we're not dragging him around with our dumb, stupid idiot. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:08:20] Yeah. Right. 

Sandi Querin: [00:08:24] And so when I tell people they're idiots really I'm like a fellow idiot. So I could say it. It's not like I'm speaking from any other platform. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:08:31] I'm one too. There we go. Yeah. So 

Sandi Querin: [00:08:35] I just, I know that all through that time and I, I was so sickly and, Tired, you know, my body was letting me down, but I was coughing up blood.

My lung collapsed, my lung got cut out, blah, blah, blah. And I learned how to 

Alexis Newlin: [00:08:50] proceed. 

Sandi Querin: [00:08:52] Yeah. Because again, I learn how to persevere on a taste, something else. I learned how to trust God through [00:09:00] all of that. Yeah. Yeah. Because none of it came easy. It was, you're a girl. You can't do that. Well, God's making me, I'm sorry.

And by the way, why do I know this stuff about you, by the way, where does this power come from? It's either of the devil and if it's of the devil you and your you and your wisdom and your accusatory tone should be able to cast the devil out of me. Yeah. Now, if you can't cast the devil out of me, you should have a problem with yourself.

Yeah. Oh, if it's not the devil, then it's God. Yeah. Cause it's clearly not human. It's not flesh, man. Can't do these things. So if it's God get out of the way, if it's the devil deliver me, I'm wide open cast my demons out and they, they disappear. Hmm, because when you put it like that to somebody, it goes beyond their religion, it goes beyond their legalism.

[00:10:00] And I've, it's just, it's a weird, it's just real quick how people grab onto something because of their own fear and their own concerns. Like I never have been asked very often about the woman thing. No. Yeah, hardly ever. I mean, people that are bound to legalism will usually. Have something to say, but then after they see the miracles of God, they're quiet, they back up and they usually say, okay, was wrong.

Or they go, well, this is weird, I'm leaving. And then they're gone. They're gone. Yeah. But, but, but that's the trouble with Jesus. I could talk to you for hours about God and you will not necessarily be changed. God is good. God is great. But Jesus died for you. When I start talking about Jesus, he requires a sacrifice.

He requires a commitment. He requires a response. [00:11:00] So you're going to talk about Jesus. Okay. Things get different. Yeah. They get different. Yeah. And when your life, your ministry, your call is birth out of Jesus Christ. Things get shook up. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:11:10] Yes, they do. 

Sandi Querin: [00:11:11] Yeah. You've seen it. You know, it, people don't always. Like it, they don't even understand it, but they're happy to come against it.

And because of that adversity, I had to grow trust through faith. And that's really mature faith because if you can't trust God, but you have faith, what you're going to do is say, well, I feel like, you know, I want to believe, you know, that God's going to give me this thing. Yeah, and you're going to hold on to that thing and you're going to hold onto that promise that believing that knowing even the group we're hoping of it, but if it doesn't come to pass 

Alexis Newlin: [00:11:53] your walk, 

Sandi Querin: [00:11:55] you walk and you have, you have these weird unexpected unexplained [00:12:00] disappointments.

But if you can be like Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego and say, Hey look, 

Alexis Newlin: [00:12:05] yeah, I love that story. 

Sandi Querin: [00:12:07] Like, what's your favorite part about? 

Alexis Newlin: [00:12:09] Oh, I think my favorite is the fact that they. They're like, I don't care. Like if God doesn't save us, we're still calling him Lord.  that, that is my favorite part. And they went in that fire and knowing that they could have died.

That's like the heart. 

Sandi Querin: [00:12:24] Yeah. They're saying, look it, we don't know what from what, but we know this. We aren't worshiping you if we burn or if we live, we don't really care because what happens to us? Isn't the point. The fact we believe God's the point 

Alexis Newlin: [00:12:42] at people. 

Sandi Querin: [00:12:43] They lose it. I did that because I think really, I got a theory about this.

Okay. Ever since the microwave was invented and I think it was around when it was. you know, there's always something, yeah. The microwave's invented. Everyone's going to die of a brain [00:13:00] tumor from the microwave. Now, today we have COVID tomorrow we'll have something else. We had SARS, we had murders, we have wide UK is going to kill people.

We always have something. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:13:09] So you got to choose who you're gonna believe. 

Sandi Querin: [00:13:10] Well, back in the day, the microwave was going to kill. Everybody was going to, you know, it was made a terrible thing, but back to my point, Is people's thinking. And of course I'm being silly. It's not necessarily the microwave, but it's the idea.

Yeah. Okay. Popcorn. I get it now. driving. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:13:30] Oh yeah. Instant gratification. Yes. Yeah. That's the, 

Sandi Querin: [00:13:33] that's the educated word. Thank you. That's it. They got to have it now. Now I have it now. And there's a lot of ministries that are created on the fact that you can have it and you deserve it and you own it. And I lay down before the cross and I say, man, buddy, Give me whatever you want to give me, take whatever you want to take.

Just, just give me you. I, I, I just want Jesus and when we have Jesus, [00:14:00] everything else comes. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:14:01] Oh yeah, sure. 

Sandi Querin: [00:14:02] We're expected to have the abundant life. Absolutely. And God has good for us, but if I have to go through my through summit diversity, as Jobe said, yeah, no, what the Lord gives or takes away. Plus, it'd be the name of the Lord.

And if we can't live in that scope, then we're foolish because at some point we're going to get clipped and we're going to disappointed and we're going to find out Jesus, Hey, after all he actually was not our all in all bummer for you. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:14:30] Yeah. 

Sandi Querin: [00:14:30] So that's story about Chad recommend checking their bed and go is so cool because.

They're saying, you know what, for what we don't know, but we trust the Lord to do the right thing for the Lord. That's the situation. People get tangled up. I want God to do that. I think for me, no, you guys supposed to be dead to yourself. What do you think self so much? What's the matter with you? Where's the Galatians.

Where's galoshins, where's the Fijian what's going on for a little word there. Right? Understand. Because maybe just, maybe they haven't fallen in love with [00:15:00] Jesus. And I tell people that all the time, if you live in so poorly, You're living so cheap. Maybe you're maybe you're not even saved because when you find Christ, John one says that God has given mankind the power, those who receive Christ the power to believe they're sons of God.

So I can't believe I'm a son of God, a child of God, a daughter, God, I can't believe I'm a child of God. If I do not receive Christ. And that word receive literally means to be shook by the root and by the foundation. And furthermore, it means to be violently seized by it. If your salvation has not filed gently seized you and shaken the world off you.


Alexis Newlin: [00:15:58] you're not saved. 

Sandi Querin: [00:15:59] It's just an [00:16:00] idea. You're not saved at all. You got an idea and people get confused. They say, well, you know what? I'll I'll, I'll ask people. This I'll say, well, you're not an atheist because an atheist doesn't care that much. They're not going to argue with you about God. Yeah. Doing their own thing.

They don't care. You're not an atheist. You're not a new ager. No, I can tell you're not. And they're like, yeah, yeah, no, I'm not. I said, so you're not a Satanist. I'll tell you what you are. Yeah. Lousy backslidden Christian. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:16:32] Oh, because 

Sandi Querin: [00:16:33] you don't know, you have enough of anything. You can't raise the dead. You can't even barely raise yourself out of your own bed.

And you want to say, because you're not a Satanist because you're not into new age because you believe in God that automatically you're a Christian hold up. I don't think so. And people forget. To examine their heart and their life. And you know, there's a whole group that says, you know, the whole [00:17:00] hippie religion, you know, free love.

God, God loves everybody. Everything's good. We're cool. Well, maybe you're not. Hmm. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:17:08] Because scripture seizes you 

Sandi Querin: [00:17:10] scripture shakes, you, scripture changes you. The power of God changes a story we're supposed to be so on fire. That people will, as they did with John Wesley, come to watch you burn. And if you're not on fire for the Lord, then I don't know if you're saying it really by clinical definition of salvation.

I don't know. I mean, 

Alexis Newlin: [00:17:36] people gotta, people gotta look 

Sandi Querin: [00:17:37] at that. And when I traveled before I was pastoring, the RCT, I traveled a lot more than I do now. Although I just did. You traveled 

Alexis Newlin: [00:17:45] get back 

Sandi Querin: [00:17:46] in Missouri, but the hat, I asked them that. I said, you need to question your salvation because I don't think you're, you know, you guys are talking bad about each other.

You're violating all the scriptures. You're having a bears. You're watching bad things you put in [00:18:00] trash inside your body and you're on Sunday, praising God. Well, I don't know that you're really praising God. I think you're praising something to make you feel better about yourself. And I said, no kind of nothing.

No, it's not. And so sometimes people would say, you know, like I was telling before about the woman thing, like, Hey, well you need to submit, you need to can't you serve, you can't go, listen, do you want to talk like that? They are completely bragging about their ignorance is all they're doing. I'm sorry. I'm like step back and listen to yourself.

Yeah. I mean, honestly, I was talking about wives. Wives, don't go above your husband. Wives. Don't do this. Why? It says, man, a woman ma'am in the morning and it says women, men and wife, men, and wife. Yeah. Talking about wives that says you got to do what your husband says. Listen, my husband doesn't want to do this stuff.

Alexis Newlin: [00:18:56] He's an engineer. He makes good 

Sandi Querin: [00:18:59] money. [00:19:00] So I don't have to take money from the church. And I'm like, you know, get out there, get 

Alexis Newlin: [00:19:03] a second job bell. 

Sandi Querin: [00:19:05] So he's telling me. You were made for this? We were high school sweethearts. We were married almost 42 years. It's like you were made for this. You 

Alexis Newlin: [00:19:13] do it. How'd y'all meet 

Sandi Querin: [00:19:15] high school.

High school. Yes. Yeah. He had a girlfriend. Cute little Italian girl. I'm Dutch Irish. I come from this, but he was Italian all the way. Just forever. The Italians. I was in the library, very because I was the student body secretary. I was trying to be that person because I was into the short hand. And well, back in that day, they had this, the bulls that you had to twirl with your finger and they were cotton fabric, like felt fabric.

And that's how you typed. Oh gosh. Yeah. You had to roll those things like old cassette tapes. [00:20:00] They were riveted. So you'd punch a key and it would go through that ribbon and it would go  and did the deal. So on the paper, that's how we did it. Well, you know, things would be as they are. And I got my thing mixed up, so I'm trying to fix it.

And I got ink all over my hand and I hair was in my face and I was wiping my face. It was like, it was out of a movie and I have incl over my face and Martin saw me through the window that was separated. The library from that little workstation. And he came in and he said, can I help you? 

He's been 

helping me ever since I 


up with that girl came over to my side.

So we dated for four years when we got, 

Alexis Newlin: [00:20:43] yeah. Wow. That's funny. Cause you guys met 

Sandi Querin: [00:20:48] yeah. High school. We were high high school sweethearts. That's what we were. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:20:54] And he felt okay with you going into ministry and doing all that. 

Sandi Querin: [00:20:57] Well, he knew cause I was 16, he was [00:21:00] 17 and I knew that's what I was supposed to do now. I, you know, the Lord hadn't released me into it yet. So cause he was like, we'd go on a date or Mark honestly. Cause he just wants to be a Catholic Baptist. That loves Jesus and approves of the Holy spirit.  the shenanigans, the, I do, he's like, Oh, 

Alexis Newlin: [00:21:23] okay. 

Sandi Querin: [00:21:25] But he is like, go for us, do your job. we go on a date and I would see somebody and I'd start crying over him.

You know, I I'd begin to weep. And I recognize that as the compassion of the Lord before Jesus did many wonderful things, he had compassion first and I will people come with this compassion. And it was before I could really like how I want to say the word, handle it, but before I really understood it and ride that wave.

Yeah. I would just go and I cry with people and they'd be like, Hey, when are you going to be done crying? You know, like the [00:22:00] kindness of strangers I've always counted on it because I wouldn't know them. And they'd be like, petting me, patting me. And I'd be like, no, no, 

I hadn't amended, 

you know, And so Martin was always patient.

Martin was always kind. And, he, he knew that's what I was supposed to do, but at the time wasn't yet. So I became sicker and sicker and the Lord healed me of cystic fibrosis, supernatural I'm on the records in Stanford as a miracle. Wow. Yourself as a mystery, don't on the record. So I'm 60. What am I?

Two 62. I shouldn't have lived past 15. And then they bumped it up to 25 and they shouldn't have been able to have kids. And I had to, oops. Yeah. They're like, wait a minute. Let's refigure our thinking. Yeah, they are, it's gone. There's nothing you could do. And then I ended up with a bone marrow disease and I had that for eight years and God supernaturally delivered me that.

And you know, but they sure [00:23:00] there's those instant things, the Holy spirit comes speed and force and Manny handles you. It's 

Alexis Newlin: [00:23:06] okay. Miracle. Yeah. 

Sandi Querin: [00:23:07] Powerful. But then there's the healings, the healings take away. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:23:15] I didn't really understand that until , with my  cancer, cause like you're going to be healed of cancer, but cancer hasn't grown in three years 

Sandi Querin: [00:23:21] by 

Alexis Newlin: [00:23:21] not doing anything.

Like my doctors, like. Okay. Like I wait for three, three hours and then five minutes. He's like, yeah, you're fine. Come back in four months. I'm like, okay. And he's just waiting. He's so scared to not see me. Cause he's like, it's gonna grow and I'm not gonna be able to catch it. You're gonna die. And I'm like, I'm not, I'm going to be fine.

 he just looks up, he's waiting for that bad news. And he's like, it's still, it's still the same. It's just blown away. , but yeah, , you're going to be healed and you think it's instantaneous and it really is a process 

Sandi Querin: [00:23:47] and there's different ways. Yeah. There is. You can be healed if I pray for you because God's given me the faith one time, whenever you can be healed because you have the faith, [00:24:00] you can be healed because you confessed 

Alexis Newlin: [00:24:02] it to the brethren.

Sandi Querin: [00:24:03] You can be here. I mean, there are so many ways of healing. I think God deliberately did it that way. So we really wouldn't have a formula in the book of James goes into that, that we would always lean on the Lord. If we had a formula really. What do we actually 

Alexis Newlin: [00:24:17] need? Just bring the boards, being the formula.


Sandi Querin: [00:24:19] Yeah. Really need this whole relationship for, right. Yeah. And certainly there's a difference between relationship. And fellowship. And I think when you cross over and you go past relationship and you start hanging out in fellowship, there's an intimacy, there's a tenderness. There's a beauty to that.

There's a trust in that where it's a, it's a beautiful, intimate friendship, and it's not just an acquaintance, it's a friendship. And it, and it not to say, you know, to sing that song, I'm a friend to God. It's not like it's not a flippant thing. It's something you've. Made effort toward, yeah, because he's made effort toward you.

Like I said, the cross, you know, it [00:25:00] requires it does that requires a response. And so people that want to do cheap living and say, well, you know, God forgives me. Yeah. He does. Is that all you got is that all you want I do is get forgiven over and over again. I mean, aren't you done in the spending cycle yet out, do something else.

And they don't understand there's life and life abundant and they get hung up because if the Lord tells them, you know, I'm going to heal you, they sometimes feel like it's got to happen right now. And again, They want God to help them on their terms. Yeah. God will never do that. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:25:35] No, never. 

Sandi Querin: [00:25:36] He's never, he's not that small guy and nor do we really want it 

Alexis Newlin: [00:25:41] to no, we really want it.

Sandi Querin: [00:25:46] Yeah. If we're in an idiot mode, half the world would be dead or not liking them, you know? So we gotta be careful and I think. The whole process between healing and miracles is once you [00:26:00] trust Jesus, it doesn't matter. And people get healed. I've seen it so often accidentally. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:26:06] Yeah. 

Sandi Querin: [00:26:07] You know, like examine the new Testament.

The Bible says that Peter's shadow healed the sick, I mean, get out of town. It's bizarre because the beauty of it is he didn't know. So he couldn't be prideful of, he's just cruising around in the sunshine, you know, with all these weird people clinging on and crawling around him. Probably. Yeah. Yeah. So when it's a healing, often it's a process.

It's a learning curve, but when it's a miracle, God will just handle you right now. Yeah. Made well, and God does both, you know, and I think the people that get it confused have, sorry, lives, if I can use that old grandma term [00:27:00] because I am a grandma so I can, yeah, they have sorry lives because they're always sorry for themselves.

Yeah. They can never joy in the Lord and trust him to do great and mighty things in spite of their trouble. In spite of the pain, Jesus walked up Calvary and we have proof at the garden. Again, me that he wasn't happy about it and they beat him and he did didn't even look like a man that plucking his beard out there, spitting on him.

Imagine such a thing. And here, here are the King of glory. He does something. He keeps 

Alexis Newlin: [00:27:31] thinking of us. 

Sandi Querin: [00:27:32] Yeah. He keeps walking. Now he can walk up there. We can please. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:27:37] We can push through, honestly. 

Sandi Querin: [00:27:38] Yeah. It's like suck it up. Yeah. Yeah. Pushing through is a big deal. So people, we, you know, I think we forget that.

And that's what we teach at the revival center. Your balance. You've got to have that. You got it. You got to come into the balance. You got to come into the balance and take what God's given you. Now, the trick is, and it is kind of tricky when the devil's chasing you and giving you trouble. You got to turn around in a [00:28:00] spiritual sense and punch him in the teeth and take his voice away.

And that's an aggressive act and you've got to tell him, no, you get off of me, but people have to know the difference between when they're submitting to God and when they're yielding to the enemy. Okay. Because if you yield to the enemy yield, you won't fight. You won't get rid of him. You just be rolling around, you know, Like a cow waiting to go to slaughter, like a sheep, as the word says in Isaiah waiting to go to slaughter up.

Everything's bad. Everything's bad. Well, get up and get the devil off yet. And then the Bible says, you know, now you've done everything. No, just stand there and watch me. It's people forget, they have an adversary there. You got to get the devil off yet, get him out, get him gone and let God do it to what God's going to do.

And I tell people as you know, follow peace. You pray about it. If you have peace, pursue it. If you don't have peace, do not pursue 


because God's not in that. And so it's [00:29:00] true in our lives. If you're going through trial, , make sure the enemy's off of it. And then you can peacefully learn from God because you know, the Bible says that those who wait upon the Lord will gain their strength and the amount of his wings with wings of Eagles, that word waiting.

And, and I, I wish I could. I wish I used to tattoo this on every Saint's heart. That word waiting literally means to be tied up in a three cord braided strand with the one you're waiting for. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:29:37] That's 

Sandi Querin: [00:29:37] beautiful. It's so beautiful. And then when you're waiting on Jesus, if you get mad at him and you're going to get all pissy about it, guess what.

When he comes, you're going to be judging him instead of rejoicing in him. And whatever he brings is never going to be good enough for you because you were tangled up when your own anger, your own bitterness, your own vial heart. But if we can say on, [00:30:00] wait on Jesus. I personally Alexis, maybe because I've been forced to do it so long, I just decided I would like it.

I love to wait on Jesus. Yeah. I love it. Because I know he's faithful and it gives me a chance to say, man, how I want to worship you on this side, the red sea don't don't park the water yet. And I tell the Lord, don't park the water yet. Just sit here a minute. Okay. Let's watch the Egyptians come a let and get a little closer.

So I could worship you a little deeper, a little better, a little writer. No. I love that waiting on Jesus, because you learn, you learn, you grow. It's beautiful. And that's really how you learn how to trust him. And that was a very long answer. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:30:48] No, that was great. No, that was really great because waiting is something people don't like to do.

Sandi Querin: [00:30:54] It's a lost art form. I find, wait, no, it's a lost art form. And I mean, I blame the [00:31:00] holding in the microwave. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:31:01] Yeah. But 

Sandi Querin: [00:31:02] now it's just, like you said, the instant gratification we're taught, it's coming. It's coming. If I pay my time, this is going to happen. You pay your time because it's your reasonable service.

You pay your tide because. It, God told you to you pay your time because God said it will come back to you, press down. Right? Overflowing it'll come back to you. It may not come back to you with money. Yeah. Maybe it's going to come back in another way. Yeah. 

Maybe your prayers will be answered for someone else and isn't that beautiful.

Alexis Newlin: [00:31:35] It is. 

Sandi Querin: [00:31:36] And I think Christianity shouts death to self. I was dealing with some Satanists one time. And, we're talking about, well, they reminded me screaming and groaning, but the idea was, what's going to happen when you die. Yeah. And they said to me, you're a fool that you want to go and [00:32:00] serve in heaven when we can rule in hell, which is such a lie.

Well, it's total lie, but that's what they're taught that the rule and reign in heaven. And you can almost, even when you  I mean, the rule and reign in hell, and you can almost hear the devil mocking and screeching and laughter just even saying that because he's got them convinced, especially a Satanism is different than, you know, the cold witchcraft, you know, cat burners at the cemetery.

It's different than that. And it's a terrible wickedness. The brotherhood is a bad thing. So, when that happens, when they're confronted with their death, They go out shouting and screaming glory and all their glory because they think they're going to rule. Oh, that's yeah. They're 

Alexis Newlin: [00:32:46] hard. 

Sandi Querin: [00:32:47] I dealt with them almost 11 years at very aggressively.

Very, which I don't want to talk about it, but it's tough stuff. So they are hard to reach to coming out of that. They usually lose their mind. And they go crazy and they were [00:33:00] in the nut house or they kill themselves. But with the power of Jesus, they can come out clean and whole, there have been many that have come out that way.

They take a lot of time, a lot of patience, a lot of effort. But the point is the reason I mentioned. Yeah, because Jesus says die to yourself. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:33:16] Yeah. 

Sandi Querin: [00:33:17] Satan, it says have whatever you want. Exalt yourself. Yeah. Really good. Well said. Exactly. Yeah. Exalt yourself and Jesus now exalt me. And even they're taught the enemy is like, no, you're ruling hell you rule in hell because they want everyone to feel like they've just got it all.

Don't die to your flesh. See Jesus says, do you know, you gotta do that. And the people who are riding both sides, they don't understand if you're not willing to die to your flesh and do the things that the Lord has told you to do, then you're actually. Ruling in your own life. Yeah. And that's a step away from the other side.

[00:34:00] Yeah. There's really two sides because it's a spirit of the antichrist. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:34:05] Yeah. Or 

Sandi Querin: [00:34:06] it's his spirit of the Lord. So if you're not working for the Lord, then you're working for yourself. Yeah. Which you don't have any power. So basically you're working for the enemy. X and people would say, and maybe even people listening now I would ask legalism.

No, no, it isn't. It's reality. That is reality. So we don't get saved through works. Forget that we'd all fry. There's no way with this. That's not going to happen. We don't get saved through works, but the Lord says, look at man, I need you to go from purification to consecration and to sanctification. And the trouble is people hanging out in purification so long.

But they just keep running. They keep right wrestling with themselves. They can never lay it down. They can never die to self. They can never get over it. So they never then thereby go into consecration. It never happens. They can't make a commitment. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:34:58] Explain that. Okay. 

Sandi Querin: [00:34:59] Yeah. [00:35:00] Purification is, I want. To do what I want to do for me, but I want to do what Jesus does and I'm wrestling.

And I don't know, on a back and forth. And I'm full of myself. Consecration is when I said, look, I'm going to make my flesh start obey.  I'm going to renew my mind. I'm going to change my soul, which is your, you know, your, your emotions and what pushes you and what drives you. I'm going to change that.

And you're in consecration. You're saying, you know what? I've already decided not to listen to that bad music. Cause I went through the purification process. And I decided Jesus was better than me and bigger than me. And then I go through consecration and I allow Jesus to be part of my soul. And I, and I, I now come to the place where I want to do things for the Lord.

I start serving others. I make a commitment to read my word. I make a commitment and say, this is how I will live in my life. And you do that enough. And pretty soon, your mind is renewed. Your spirit [00:36:00] is soaring and . Dragging your flesh with it and your soul. All of a sudden, you're in love with Jesus.

Now you're a sanctified being, which Paul says, man, I wish you all. Why did he say that those are easier folks to deal with? 

Alexis Newlin: [00:36:14] That's why, 

Sandi Querin: [00:36:17] and it's a lifetime gig really? I mean, you gotta just, they want to keep rolling. They got to keep going. Well, yeah, you do. Yeah. And people come against that. What was legalism?

No, we're not. No, it's not. It's Christian entity. They'd get confused on what Christianity is. It's okay to be kind to people and be powerful at the same time. Hmm. You don't have to be mean and rude all the time. No. And people are in a, I don't want me, I'm going to fit in a fit. They needed a time out. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:36:48] Yeah.

They're at a time out. 

Sandi Querin: [00:36:52] So grandson the other day, he's four. And. He must have seen it on a show [00:37:00] or cartoon or something. It land on the floor. You can see the visual with his on his back and he's throwing his arms up in the air and his fists are pounding on the floor and his feet are kicking with his heels, hitting the floor, and he's going down.

His brothers are kind of laughing under their breath. Well, what are you doing? It was I'm throwing a fit. I go, you want, you are, he goes, yeah. And he keeps doing it. And I go, I need you to quit doing that. He goes, Oh, I'm going to keep doing it. I'm all right. You can keep doing it outside. Then it was about a hundred degrees.

I said, you keep doing it house. My house is like really a nice 70 degrees zone. And I put him outside and close the door. You can't do that. He starts pounding on the door, like a kangaroo. Oh really, I can do it. And I just did it fit. Go roll around on the lawn and he yells him. He goes, I'm not a dog. Well, you're acting 

like a dog, [00:38:00] work it out.

So, but two minutes later I went out and brought him an ice cream. Like, what are you doing? He goes, I am playing with my dinosaurs. He was totally happy. He's not gonna throw a fit again. It was hot out 

Alexis Newlin: [00:38:15] there.

That was amazing. 

Sandi Querin: [00:38:21] That, 

Alexis Newlin: [00:38:25] all right. Talk to us a little bit about fear. There's something that we're experiencing a lot right now with what's going on with her world and why fear is just no good. 

Sandi Querin: [00:38:36] The trouble with fear is everybody's got a portion of it, you know, and I think fear. There's some things that I am a, I, we don't use the word.

We're like, I'm I read about it or I'm concerned, or I'm scared of it. You know, like a bug or something. I think people have a natural, healthy [00:39:00] desire to survive. And so they withdraw to themselves and I think that's part of life, but people that get consumed with the fear, if they don't understand, it brings unbelief.

And unbelief doubt. And so people that have fear in their life, they began to be short tempered. They begin to lose their security, even the assurance of their salvation. They can lose it and people have different callings. Now your giftings are made. To be pushed through your callings. So you have a gift for, for, you know, for.

Whatever you're doing right now,  

Alexis Newlin: [00:39:49] writing or whatever. I'm doing, whatever, 

Sandi Querin: [00:39:52] whatever your doula. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:39:54] Okay. So 

Sandi Querin: [00:39:56] ding I, you to do [00:40:00] this, and this becomes the creation of what you're doing as a calling, but you couldn't do it. If you didn't have the gift of word and I call it with you, I call it song song because your words are like a song.

Oh, yeah. Oh yeah. Your words like a poem. They're beautiful. So you have that gifting, which pushes itself through and create and accommodate to call them. Huh? It accommodates the calling. That's beautiful. Well, some people. Just use their gift and I'm a gifted person. Well, sit down because we don't need another gifted person.

Alexis Newlin: [00:40:36] Okay. 

Sandi Querin: [00:40:38] We actually, you think I haven't said that 

Alexis Newlin: [00:40:43] it's amazing. 

Sandi Querin: [00:40:45] They didn't think so, but like you, we don't need another gifted person. We need another purified person. Moving through their call for the glory of God, accessing the gifts that God gave them, that they have purified [00:41:00] themselves to you. Okay. But they don't, they don't want to do that because they don't want to sit down under Christ.

They don't want to forgive. They don't want to read the word. They don't want to become what God's called them to be. They want to take a shortcut, but, and just be gifted. And you can, you don't tell when someone's just gifted. Okay. Yeah, because they're a bigger idiot than you.

I now ruined your podcast. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:41:33] It's simple 

Sandi Querin: [00:41:35] problem because they're gifted. You know, I want to be a prophet. I want to pray. I wanted this. I wanted that. None. No, no, no, no. Sit down. Yeah. Calmed down and the old Testament. I know I'm not answering your question, but I don't 

Alexis Newlin: [00:41:45] really care. That's fine. 

Sandi Querin: [00:41:49] Yeah. When they, it was two guys.

Cause she, and him as 

Alexis Newlin: [00:41:54] I've been story 

Sandi Querin: [00:41:55] now, I don't know. I forget which one was, which, but I think, him as was the [00:42:00] good one and cushy was the bad one. Now they were both runners. They were, you're a runner. You've ran. You do run. I do not. I get on a horse because I'm an inch smarter 

Alexis Newlin: [00:42:14] than you.


Sandi Querin: [00:42:21] Will work for carrots. Yeah. Anyway, they are both writers and now cushy is famous for it. Like he's. He's an Olympic athlete pretty much right now. him as he's fairly good, not as good as cushy, but what a, him as has, is a calling. He was to go tell the King, the news of the kingdom. Yeah. She had a calling and God was going to use his gifting to accommodate, accomplish and pursue the call.

Alexis Newlin: [00:42:59] Oh, I [00:43:00] understand. Okay. Got it. 

Sandi Querin: [00:43:01] Got it. Yeah. Cushy comes up. Like every quote, unquote gifted person does gifted, meaning they're supposed to do it, but they're wrecking their gift. Cause they won't lay down unto the Lord. They won't crucify their flesh. They become weirdos. And so they can't, they can't pull it off, but they can run.

They got the gift. So cushy comes up and throws a fit like my little grandson. Right. He says, I want, I want to run. I'm a good runner. Look at me, check me out. I can run. I can run. And the guy's like, be quiet, get out of here. And he's like, no, no, I can run. I can run. I can run. They go, okay, fine. Go ahead and run.

Well at him as already took off and he's running now, if I got the characters wrong, flip them and we're good. But if it gets to him as he's right, and he's going, he's just running his heart out. He's got a call, you know, Got it, a token for the King and cushy passes the guy, his tennis shoes. He's [00:44:00] like Sonic man.

He just, yeah. And he gets to the King and the King looks at him and says, Hey, so what's up? Yeah, you got tidings for me. What's going on? And he goes, hi. I don't have anything, but man, I can run, right? 

Alexis Newlin: [00:44:16] Yes.

Sandi Querin: [00:44:19] And King David goes, Hey idiot, go sit in the corner. So he goes in the corner and you guys sit there and David's like, man, that guy's dumb, you know? Oh 

Alexis Newlin: [00:44:31] my God. 

Sandi Querin: [00:44:32] So gifted. But it's gifting is stupid and it doesn't mean anything it's full of pride and horror and it's unaccomplished and it's, it's not tethered to the cross.

And then here comes to him as me, me, me, me, he goes, Hey, you got tidy. He says, well, yeah, here's the thing. Kid was King. Your son's dead. You know, with honor with righteousness, with respect, he's done. And the man was, you know, [00:45:00] rewarded and it's good, but the world is full of these people with these fancy shoes that think they can just run, they haven't paid a price to do nothing, but they got like an idea and some churches are carry on.

Like, well, whatever you have in your mind, whatever idea, that's the prophetic, I'm like, what. And they go around and speaking it to people and they were people, they destroy people and it's wrong because it's that isn't even a gift. That's an idea of a gift that they're running around with their shoes and making a mess out of people that don't mind for me.

I I've been in this, you know, I've been doing this a long time. I'm preaching 50 years, but for people who are new in the kingdom, Man, we gotta be careful with 

Alexis Newlin: [00:45:42] that. Hurt him. 

Sandi Querin: [00:45:42] Yeah. Yeah. And the people who, who are new to Pentecost is my big, you know, they're new to Pentecost. We have to be so careful with them that they understand the power of God is not hurtful, not harmful, but it is the power of God.

[00:46:00] We have to yield. To the Lord Jesus and walk in that power. And how fear has to deal with that. You didn't think 

Alexis Newlin: [00:46:07] I knew it was coming. Yeah,

Sandi Querin: [00:46:13] I catch rabbits. So anyway, how that works is if I'm afraid, let's say I'm, I'm afraid of, you know, I'm afraid of black shirts and you have a black shirt on all those stupid cause I'm wearing a black shirt, but let's say I was afraid of black shirts and. The Lord told me to go pray for Alexis and you have a black shirt on, I will clamp up.

I feel like I can't, I can't play. I pray for her. I can't do it. She has a black shirt on, I love her, but I am not getting past that shirt. Well, how does that become so monumental when it starts out as a simple fear, it eats away. It destroys. And now I am. Denying my call and denying my Lord because of a fear that I've held tight and then I've held close.

[00:47:00] And when we fear anything, we're not trusting the Lord. Yeah. Point in case, as you know, we've never shut down with the RC. No announcement that I don't tell people because what's the point we've never shut down. There's three forms and people on their shoulder, the shoulder, no masks, no nothing. We're rolling.

We never stopped. Not for one minute. Not one case would go, but how did that happen? You see the Lord said do not close that church. I trusted him to take care of everything. Yeah. If everyone's going to die of COVID cool. Let's go. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:47:34] Let's go to heaven because God said to do it. So 

Sandi Querin: [00:47:37] when you start judging the outcome, you're going to fail and you're going to be full of fear because Jesus said, trust me now, if you don't trust him, then you're going to be full of fear.

That's where trust. Plays such a big part. It should in our lives. If I trust it's the Lord with all these things in fear has no place. And people that allow the, the media and [00:48:00] family and different friends, different people to control them and to just spew the sphere on them. They don't want it. I don't think they want it.

I don't think we are. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:48:09] No, it's put in us. 

Sandi Querin: [00:48:10] Yeah. Yeah, 

Alexis Newlin: [00:48:12] exactly. It's a learn thing. Hey, jump off that cliff. I'll catch you. 

Sandi Querin: [00:48:16] Oh, I'm sorry. Right 

Alexis Newlin: [00:48:17] now you're afraid of cliffs. You don't want to go anywhere near a cliff. 

Sandi Querin: [00:48:22] You don't trust me. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:48:24] You're like that. Person's nuts. Check that box. Yeah. 

Sandi Querin: [00:48:30] That's how it goes. We learn it like you said.

Yeah. Yeah, definitely. We learn it and we're learning it now. People who were not 

fearful before or learning how to be fearful. It's terrible. 

It's a sad, it's a sad thing to watch, but I don't hang out with those people. And I recently somebody was around me. They were like, Oh, carry on. You know, I go out, I'll see you later.

And they say to me, well, no, I want to have the conversation. I go, no, I don't. I don't really like the conversation. They, what [00:49:00] do you mean? You don't like the conversation? I said, well, you're full of fear and I'm not. There's no way we're not going to get in an argument. I don't allow fear in my life. I don't know how people that talk that way to me, because we're all just enjoy away from getting it wrong.

And today, if I've got it right, I have to protect that. So when people have fear, they have to understand this. This is the main drive the Bible says in Galatians that yeah, we know perfect love. I love casts out fear. Yeah. But the Bible says. That there is something that activates love, activates faith. So if we don't have faith, how can we extinguish fear to believe beyond that fear to believe it's not even true and coming it's love going.

It's love. Well, how, what is that love? It's easy to say. Well, love, you know, I love you. Sure. I do. I write a song song about love. I sing a song about love. I love my little [00:50:00] grand baby throwing a fit. I love the other grand baby. When he's not throwing a fit, it's a love situation. We all know about love. We have all encountered, should love the joy of it and the pain of it one time or another, we understand love, but that scripture is talking about the love.

Of God. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:50:18] Yeah. 

Sandi Querin: [00:50:19] The love that Jesus Christ poured out on the cross. See, because what we don't understand is that Jesus came to this earth out of obedience, flat out. He stayed and hung because of love. And that my friend. Is something we all need to look at. It's not just, I love my neighbor. Yeah. You love your neighbor.

When your neighbors nice to you. When your neighbors, meany pants, all of a sudden 

Alexis Newlin: [00:50:51] you don't love them. Very much. They're dogs keeping me up. I'm going to pray. Their dog 

Sandi Querin: [00:50:56] dies.

[00:51:00] Yeah. And the name of Jesus. Kill that dog, right? Well, where's 

Alexis Newlin: [00:51:04] the love on you? There's no love. No, you've been driving down the road. Yeah. He drive with people, 

Sandi Querin: [00:51:11] buddy. There's like that driver. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:51:13] They're 

Sandi Querin: [00:51:14] freaking out about a driver that they don't know. They've never met. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:51:18] And furthermore, the guy can't hear them.

Sandi Querin: [00:51:22] What are you doing? 

Alexis Newlin: [00:51:23] Losing 

Sandi Querin: [00:51:24] your control behind the wheel of a car? That's a guy that's out of control. You know, I did that one time. I was 16. I had a big old. For the old people, they would know galaxy 500 big old beat up giant limit, floating living room, big, old car. My dad drove with me and I was doing that.

You know, I was gone too slow, man. My dad went quiet. He went, he went dark on me, silent. We are out in the country. We drove 10 miles. Got there. We get out. He goes, let me have your keys. I go, okay. If my kids, I said, what do you want with the keys? He goes, [00:52:00] you're not driving for a month. And listen, dude, buddy, we were in the country.

Okay. So I couldn't drive. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:52:10] Yeah, right. Yeah.

Sandi Querin: [00:52:15] and I said, well, wha what's going on? And he said, if you can't handle your life behind the wheel of a car, you can't handle life at all. Then you better think about that. And I really rarely ever complained about a driver since you find, let him in, you know, all right. You know what I mean? Everybody's having a hard day.

Everybody's having a hard day, one time. we were at an intersection and it was a long wide intersection and traffic was backed up man to the freeway. And there was an old man in this car with his little wife. And he couldn't quite give it the [00:53:00] gas. You know what I mean? He couldn't get through this four lane intersection and I'm in this car.

We're like three cars back. And I see all the cars honking at him being mad and almost violent. And then Martin honked his horn. I started weeping and wailing like a basket case. He goes, what is wrong with you, man? What would that was your child? 

What if that was your dad? What if 

that was your friend?

Everyone honking at me, poor me. I'm really upset. And I look at him and I go, you honked at him. You better do something about that. He gets out the car. The door and I'm like, Oh, that poor man. 

He probably feels humiliated in front of his little wife. 

He's like terrified Martin goes up. He tells the old Mander bell, the window [00:54:00] down, the old man welds at winter town and Martin yells at him.

And he said, it's old, man. When I give it the go, you give it the gas. Michael stood in the intersection when it was green, held everybody off on either side that was trying to get through and do their thing. And he pointed, ultimately he goes, give it the gas

and Martin gets in the car. Are you happy now? Yes. No, I'm happy. Everybody's honking at an old man. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:54:35] What can he 

Sandi Querin: [00:54:37] is the matter? Fix it. Yeah. Away from it. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:54:41] Yeah. Probably be tow, but if he's, yeah. 

Sandi Querin: [00:54:45] Obviously needs help. And I think to myself, what's going to happen to me when I'm 94 and a half and I'm in a car and I'm trying to make it happen.

And everybody's honking at me. Mercy. That'd be terrible. Wouldn't it. [00:55:00] No someone you really loved and you think I would never want anybody to treat someone like that. I really never would, but the problem is we don't forgive. And then we get fearful. We don't love like Christ loved and we get fearful and that eats away at our faith.

And so if people have become fearful, really the statement they need to think about is why have you become fearful? 

Alexis Newlin: [00:55:25] Hmm. Well, you this way before 

Sandi Querin: [00:55:27] what's in you, that made that rise up. Are you reading your word more than you're watching the news? What are you doing? What kind of music you listening to? You edifying your spirit or your flesh?

Alexis Newlin: [00:55:39] Yeah. 

Sandi Querin: [00:55:40] It's like this age old question. You could go back 200 years and find a sermon on that preached and you can find it last week, somewhere. Yeah. The age old thought. Of crucify your flesh and lift Christ up, feed your soul spirit more than your flesh, and you're going to be [00:56:00] okay. And I think our lives tell on us when we're wrapped up in so much fear.

That's a great, yeah. So it was wrong with you when you're mad behind the wheel of car all the time. Oop, something's wrong with you when you can't labor long? Like my sweet Filipino brethren, you know, 

Alexis Newlin: [00:56:20] 30, 40 years ago 

Sandi Querin: [00:56:22] when you can't. Be a Filipino and the spirit and hang in there. Something's wrong with you?

Yeah. When you got to judge everybody, 

Alexis Newlin: [00:56:30] something's wrong with you? 

Sandi Querin: [00:56:31] Absolutely. Absolutely. Something's wrong with you? And something's wrong with me when we get to that place where we're short tempered, we've got it. Got to get in the word we got to. Oh man, I need some cautions today. I better remember how to live the Christian life.

I better get James in me and I tell people. You know, when you get like that, the best thing for you to do is read the book of James every day, every day, and then S and then read Psalm one 19 every day, every day. And it puts you in a frame of mind, [00:57:00] like, okay, I need the word, I want the word, I love the word.

And pretty soon you're reading Matthew, you're reading, Psalms, you're reading other things. You're hanging out with Colossians and Ephesians of glaciers. You need getting the job done and Philippians, you have become a Philippian. It changes you. Because people forget that whatever they're doing tells on them, the abundance of who you are and what you're doing speaks to demands abundance of your heart.

As scripture says from the abundance of the heart, 

Alexis Newlin: [00:57:32] the mouth speaks 

Sandi Querin: [00:57:33] and also the life lives. Anyways. I don't know if that answers 

Alexis Newlin: [00:57:37] your question. Perfect. 

Sandi Querin: [00:57:38] Fear is a wretched. Enemy. And some people are naturally, they disposed to it 

Alexis Newlin: [00:57:44] because I struggled with it. 

Sandi Querin: [00:57:45] Did you? Yeah. Where'd you get it 

Alexis Newlin: [00:57:49] parents? Hmm.

Sandi Querin: [00:57:50] See, it is a wicked inherited thing. I can, my parents, my dad, we never got in trouble for much, except for if we lied or if we were afraid he couldn't [00:58:00] stand fear. We we'd go. I couldn't swim. We get thrown into the pool on the deep end. Figure it out. My dad was flying a private plane. You know, we learned how to do that.

And I remember one time he put in the plane, went up in the sky and he goes, fly the plane. I said, what? You know, 

Alexis Newlin: [00:58:22] you're like 

Sandi Querin: [00:58:22] right now, like 14 and stuff for me, it's like, yeah, for the plane you've been watching me. So I pushed it down and we dive bomb. We went up, we went around, we did everything but crash.

And my dad watched me. And if I had showed any fear. We'd had a problem. And instead of that, we get the FFA on the radio, the FAA saying, you know, x-ray, whatever our name of our plane was. You are in, you know, airspace, you are violating all this stuff. . I was dive bombing Thundercloud space.

And I didn't know that I was doing that. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:58:58] But 

Sandi Querin: [00:58:58] you know, you [00:59:00] either learn that or you don't learn that I was put on it. Forklift 

Alexis Newlin: [00:59:04] do it. 

Sandi Querin: [00:59:04] If you crash into a building fine, then you'll learn how to not do it. You know, do it that way. Jump do, do do, because fear it'll own you. Well, if it's that's it's intention.

Okay. Last year. 

Alexis Newlin: [00:59:18] Cause my mom was about caution and safety. And so she would say things out of safety, like, Oh, to keep you safe or to keep you , just to protect. But then 

Sandi Querin: [00:59:27] it was just fine. Did you find yourself becoming consumed with it safety then? 

Alexis Newlin: [00:59:32] Yeah. Safety and then worrying about things and then 

Sandi Querin: [00:59:35] you have no peace that became fear 

Alexis Newlin: [00:59:37] ever.

Sandi Querin: [00:59:37] Yeah. When did you break that? How did you get past that? 

Alexis Newlin: [00:59:41] Oh gosh. I think actually after she died, when she passed away, cause I was like, okay,  my mom is gone and that was like the worst thing to happen to me ever. Cause I'm like, that was my person. And.  my biggest fear. It come true. My mom had died and I was like, okay, [01:00:00] okay.

Like now what? And so basically like walking along with God, and so God had me start conquering small things, small fears, and that's why I'm such an adrenaline. Adventure seeker. 

Sandi Querin: [01:00:12] Why? 

Alexis Newlin: [01:00:13] Because of fear. So if there's something I'm afraid got, I was like, okay, you're scared of that. Go do that. Go do that. Like when I went to Colorado last year and there was that Tara dapple ride that I wrote 

Sandi Querin: [01:00:22] that's right.

Alexis Newlin: [01:00:23] I was terrified . It took me terrifying. Yeah. I was terrified. And it took me 20 minutes to get on the platform to actually sit in the seat for like a three seconds, three minute drop. When you,

Sandi Querin: [01:00:39] when you are terrified, what does that look like? 

Alexis Newlin: [01:00:41] I'm a screamer. I do you shake and scream. What do you do? And then God's like, I'm with you come with me. He's like, I'm not going to kill you. He's like, you're not going to die this way. There's a fear of like fear of Heights. I don't like Heights. I will go in high places 

Sandi Querin: [01:00:55] would you have a physical reaction to this still, still isn't that? And so you have to [01:01:00] force yourself to overcome, 

Alexis Newlin: [01:01:01] overcome it. 

Sandi Querin: [01:01:02] That's a great affliction, really? 

Alexis Newlin: [01:01:06] Because it presses 

Sandi Querin: [01:01:07] you in to God's ability to rescue you instantly. You're constantly a rescue mission. 

Alexis Newlin: [01:01:15] Wow. Like it has to be this way. It's like, yeah.

So like drop towers. At amusement parks. If I love someone, I will get on it. Hannah Rogers is  one of the, one of the only people who can really get me and Claudia are the only people who can get me on way. Cause I'm like, I love you guys. I will write this. And it's, there's this one at six flags.

It's 405 feet. And it drops you at 85 miles an hour. And I didn't realize that I was super horrified of it until I got on it like a few years ago with Tara and Chris and all them. And they got heard. Yeah, they got to hear my reaction too. Being dropped in Heights. And so I'm like, okay, it's a horrible round, never get on it.

And so the Lord's like, you can do it. And so if someone asks me and I love them enough, I will get on that ride 

[01:02:00] Sandi Querin: [01:02:00] about it right 

Alexis Newlin: [01:02:00] now. Are you freaked out? Yeah, I can picture it. I'm just \ , 


I really don't like it, 

Sandi Querin: [01:02:06] but I keep going back 

Alexis Newlin: [01:02:08] because I know that I'm like, I'm going to be okay. It just proves it's just for me to crucify that you're going to die.

This fear that 

Sandi Querin: [01:02:15] you have Batman Jesus. Yeah, you 

get rescued all the time, 

somehow, baby Jesus in a manger. So they got, you know, he cruises around a little bit. You got back 

Alexis Newlin: [01:02:29] and it's going on a tee shirt. 

Sandi Querin: [01:02:30] Absolutely. Yeah. And that's  a great thing about the Lord. He will never fail you. He will never forsake you.

He will, they never leave you. And sometimes he changes you in ways you don't particularly approve of, but, but he's in it. 

Alexis Newlin: [01:02:46] That's 

Sandi Querin: [01:02:46] such a tremendous thing that you pursue, that to the delight of the Lord, to the delight of thought, because I know you go on.  rollercoasters 

[01:03:00] Alexis Newlin: [01:02:59] those, I just don't like being dropped.

Sandi Querin: [01:03:01] Oh, 

Alexis Newlin: [01:03:02] I love roller coasters. I just like being dropped. Like that's the, I don't like Heights and I like drop being dropped. And so that Tara dactyl ride. Oh, 

Sandi Querin: [01:03:12] it was, did you do it because you afraid of it? Yes. That's what draws you to it? Like you're, you're in a position to fight the fear. Well, isn't that admirable?

Alexis Newlin: [01:03:24] Yeah. So that's why I did it. Cause I was terrified. I'm like that's right. I remember 

Sandi Querin: [01:03:27] when we had that, Turangi Villa. And you were petting the terrain. 

Alexis Newlin: [01:03:31] That was terrifying. Yeah. Roaches are another thing. And now I kill them. I'm very violent when I killed him. But before I used to, I have to leave my house.

I'd have to call a friend. I'm like, I have to sleep at your house. There's a Roach in my house. That's how bad the fear was. Really 

Sandi Querin: [01:03:48] fear of. 

Alexis Newlin: [01:03:49] I have a thing. And so God's like, no, no, no. 

Sandi Querin: [01:03:53] Now let me ask you this. If you have fear of a thing, does that fear play into [01:04:00] other things? 

Alexis Newlin: [01:04:01] Oh yeah. Yeah, definitely. 

Sandi Querin: [01:04:03] Okay.

Well, you know what, thank you for this confession. We'll be praying for you Sunday.

Alexis Newlin: [01:04:16] yeah, it's gotten a lot better. I have to really sit down with God and  kind of walk through it. And he's like, let's talk about this fear. What are you, what is the base? What is the 

Sandi Querin: [01:04:28] foundation of this fear? But you know, you had that put in you as a kid. So you're really needing to overcome the foundation.

And this is, this is the trouble. This is the quandary because the foundation of your life is your mother. She said, be careful. She said, be safe. So for you to overcome your fear, you're overcoming your mother and you don't want to do that now. And so there's a conflict [01:05:00] about a conflict conflict. You don't have a headache all the time.

Alexis Newlin: [01:05:05] I don't 

Sandi Querin: [01:05:06] want to not be careful because my mom told me to be careful and your mom's not here. And it's your way of respecting, you know, your mom. Like, I don't want my mom to be wrong, so I have to be afraid of stuff, but then you love Jesus. So you're like, well, mom, don't look. But I'm going to go over this fear, you 


it's, it can be deep in that way.

but at the same time, man, you can't keep living like that. No. Yeah, no, but I think you were more afraid before. 

Alexis Newlin: [01:05:32] Oh yeah. Way more. It's much better now. 

Sandi Querin: [01:05:35] Yeah. Way more 

Alexis Newlin: [01:05:36] somebody, 

Sandi Querin: [01:05:36] if you're on you, like, can they come up and make you S right? 

Alexis Newlin: [01:05:40] No, I actually react with anger with anger now. So a couple of nights ago I had a Bible study with my friends.

And they were talking about the COVID stuff and all the fear and like people mask. And I was just like, I finally lost it. Usually it's not me. So I was just like, stop watching the news. That is a lie. [01:06:00] We who is in control God. I was yelling at them at this Bible study. It was like having her, my friend and I was like, stop it.

Stop it. And so they were like, 

Sandi Querin: [01:06:08] you were protecting your heart. 

Alexis Newlin: [01:06:10] Yeah, because I was like, stop. This is all fear fears. I was just, I just went on. And so that's kind of how we act to it now, as I yell it it's. So God's like, you have to learn how to do with love. He was like, pull back. If you feel that what certain people , he's like, just go and talk to me.

Sandi Querin: [01:06:23] It comes, I think the reason you get aggressive about it and that's what that is. Something call it cash. Nah, that sounds 

Alexis Newlin: [01:06:32] aggressive 

Sandi Querin: [01:06:35] because. What's going on is there's this familiar spirit that kind of senses that fear. And so another fear guy tries to hook up and the things it can get away with it. It doesn't know that there's a lion, that's going to eat them in there.

You've got fear, but you've had enough. All you have is all you're keeping and you're going to 

get rid of it and you're 

not taking on anymore. Your boat's going to sink [01:07:00] if you take on anymore. So. It's a familiar spirit thing, and that is actually a danger to holding onto something that is not godly. Okay.

Because the things that follow you will follow you according to who you are be. Right. Okay. Righteousness, goodness, holiness, forgiveness, purity, or fear rage. Impurity when people are that way, those things follow them. And so when we're this way that follows us and that's the abundant life, because I had to, I had to put up with that.

Alexis Newlin: [01:07:41] Yeah. 

Sandi Querin: [01:07:41] Because I LIS if you're going to be that you can't have to put up with more of that. And that's why I think you have become aggressive because that's a protection mechanism. You want to protect yourself from that, which tries to a friend, you and I think. In that sense? Aggression's [01:08:00] quite good 

Alexis Newlin: [01:08:00] because did yourself stop?

Yeah. Stop. They stopped right away. They're like, we're just concerned about going back to school. That's that's our concern. Well, just sharing it, the Bible study. Sorry. I was like, oops. 

Sandi Querin: [01:08:16] Well, you know, at times like that, to say that yeah. Well, I've got a couple buttons and that's one of them and you're pushing it, so I need to stop.

Yeah. And then you don't have to get mad and then they'll keep doing it and you can show them what happens when they push the button and then they won't do it again at the next Bible study online.

Yeah. Yeah. Fear eats and everything. And it's tough because when there's a world that is trying to make us be afraid to accomplish its own end. We actually do have to come against it. It's there's a spiritual, dynamic to that. Yeah. I'm glad you're protecting yours. [01:09:00] I'm sorry for the Bible study girls, but you're 

Alexis Newlin: [01:09:03] safe.

Oh yeah. It's just, yeah. Yeah. 

Sandi Querin: [01:09:08] That's good. 

Alexis Newlin: [01:09:09] Yeah. That's my peer journey. Your feared 

Sandi Querin: [01:09:11] journey. I didn't have a fear of journey. I wasn't allowed. Yeah. I was afraid of the spiders, but I had to get over that. And so I did. Yeah. And I want it to be delivered of it. Cause , 

Alexis Newlin: [01:09:24] who leaves our house for a bug?

 you live there, it's a bug 

Sandi Querin: [01:09:26] now. Are you still afraid of no, 

Alexis Newlin: [01:09:28] I just murdered them.  so 

Sandi Querin: [01:09:29] it's so we have learned the way you fight fear is with severe aggression murder. 

Alexis Newlin: [01:09:36] Yes. That's how I like people like will rescue bugs. Put them aside. 

Sandi Querin: [01:09:40] No, no, come on. 

Alexis Newlin: [01:09:42] I'm like, Oh no, no, no. It came it trespassed. 

Sandi Querin: [01:09:45] I'm going to murder it.

Like you can't 

Alexis Newlin: [01:09:47] pay my 

Sandi Querin: [01:09:48] hand again. I say we'll pray for you son. Yeah.

Well, isn't that a charming part of your personality? Yeah, no, that's good. You [01:10:00] found out where you can push or you can pull it's all part of the joy of life 

Alexis Newlin: [01:10:05] actually. Yeah. I mean, doing this as like a testimony to how much I've 

Sandi Querin: [01:10:08] conquered. Oh my goodness. 

Alexis Newlin: [01:10:10] Yeah. Cause I, yeah. 

Sandi Querin: [01:10:12] It's, you're not going to do this, but see, it's back to the beginning of the conversation, your gifting.

So folks you to appear yeah. Or fire yourself enough and learn enough of Jesus so that it can be released through your call, so that push, push your call forward. And I know that you bless so many people and, and people, you know, what. They need to be blessed and Jesus wants them blessed and he loves that.

They're being blessed by you. So I think it's great. Thank you. It's been fun. I love it. Keep doing it. 

Alexis Newlin: [01:10:49] Alright. Anything you want to end 

Sandi Querin: [01:10:51] on now? We've ended. 

Alexis Newlin: [01:10:55] I love you. Thank you.

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