From ‘I Do’ to ‘Who Are You?’: Navigating Couple Friendships"

In this hilarious episode of our podcast, we dive into the challenges of making couple friends in your 30s and 40s. Join us as we share our own awkward experiences, from the cringe-worthy first meetings to the struggles of finding common interests beyond Netflix binge-watching. We explore the unspoken rules of couple friendships, the competitive nature of playdates, and how to navigate the social landscape without losing your sanity. With plenty of laughs and relatable anecdotes, we’ll offer insights on how to find your tribe while keeping your relationship intact. Tune in for a comedic take on the ups and downs of adult friendships—because making new couple friends shouldn’t feel like a second job!

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Welcome to Gotta Get Said. Here's your host, Matt Cuco. What's happening, guys, and welcome to another episode of Gotta Get Said on this Tuesday, May the 12th, 2026. How's everyone doing this week? May is in the air. Mother's Day came and gone. Hopefully, all the mothers out there had a beautiful Mother's Day because you all deserve it. Being a mother is a very, very, very, very, very, very tough job. Very tough job. I do not take you guys for granted. Just know that. I don't. I truly don't. So hopefully, you guys had a great Mother's Day. I did. It was nice. Nice Mother's Day. Nice Mother's Day. We went to um the track, the horse track over by where I live. Shout out to Mammoth Racetrack. It was a fun time. And then we went to Applebee's after that with another couple with a child, one of our child's age. You know, fun fact. It was the first time ever that we hung out with this couple outside of like a soccer game or something like that, you know? So it's just so funny, like hanging out with couples for the first time. There's so many different like moving parts, there's so many different like angles. There, quite frankly, there's so many different things that can go wrong when hanging out with a new couple when you pass a certain age. The kids are kids. Nine times out of ten, unless your kids are real shithead, or unless your kids a lot of something. If your kids really shy, it can get weird. If your kid's really outgoing, it could get weird. But if your kids just like a normal-ish kid, nine times out of ten, the kids are gonna be fine. The kids are gonna have fun. Great. That's the easy part, to be perfectly honest with you. The kids hanging out and getting along is the easy part. The hard part is the parents, you know. So this is the first time ever hanging out. So the kids got along great as expected. I I had a feeling we were all gonna get along great as expected. You know, me and the male are friendly, and we're friendly. So I knew that him and I would be fine. You know, I was like, we're gonna vibe. But are the wives gonna vibe? Because let's call it spade a spade. The most important thing about a couple vert on couple hangout for the first time ever is do the wives get along? The husbands will figure it out. They'd be like, yeah, no, yeah, that's cool too. Looking at their phone, yeah, no, yeah, Nick's, right? Swept them well, you know, we'll figure it out. You know what I mean? Do the wives get along? Are the wives gonna be friends? Because that's everything. I've been in situations with my significant other that I thought it went great. And I pride myself on really being able to read the room. I pride myself on really being able to understand the situation, being present, being in the moment, really, really being observant and really catching things. And I've left situations thinking they went great. I was like, oh wow, this is amazing. She's like, eh. I was like, yeah, what happened? Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, she's kind of a bitch. Really? I didn't pick up on that. And little do you know, that was the only thing I was looking for. I was solely watching your mannerisms during this hangout, making sure you had a good time. And I came to the conclusion that you had a good time, and you're telling me you didn't have a good time. So, yes, yes, it's very frustrating. So it was the first hangout. It was the first hangout. We all meet, the kids are having a good time, you know, the ladies are drinking, which is great. But you're like, this is great, look at you. You have to like coddle her. You're doing great. You're really doing great. Keep up the good work, smile. Don't forget to smile. Okay, too much teeth, a little lower. That's it. That's our sweet spot. Nod and smile. Good job. That's that's what I feel like it's like. That's what I feel like it's like. So we got lucky. The ladies, I think, got along. It was a good time. No problems on this end. But it did get me to think like other couples. There's so many different factors when you're with other couples. There's so many different factors. Do you drink too much? Do they not drink enough? Do they drink too much? Do you not drink enough? Do they smoke? Do you smoke? Politics don't even touch, right? We're not touching politics. Definitely not touching politics. Kids are getting along, check. Not touching politics, check. Oh shit, they're they're drinking too much. Oh shit, they're smoking too much. Oh shit, I'm smoking too much. You know, it gets crazy. There's so many different little things. Like, is the why are the wives happy? We're we're good. Like, it's like it's it's it's it's it's what's the word? What's the word? It's stressful. It's it's it's it's stressful. That's the word. It's very, very stressful. It's very hard for couples to have other couple friends when you pass 34. It's very hard for couples to have other couple friends when you pass 34. Because so many different things can go wrong. So many different things can go wrong. You need every single thing to go right every single time for this couple on couple to work. Because if one thing ever goes wrong, it's over. You never give them another chance when you're past 35. Four, I said, but it's really fun, it's really, you know. You never give them another chance. We can have six good hangouts in a row with these couples. Six! That's impressive. And then they say one little sentence that triggered you the wrong way, and you can we tried. Never talking to them again, never doing this again. We tried, and it's just like wow, give them a leash, give them a leeway, give them something, and we never do one thing goes wrong. Ever, and that couple on couple is done forever. It's tough. The wives are always looking for shit. The wives are always looking for reasons. I feel like the husbands are like, they were good, right? No, they but look, look at his shirt. It was awesome. We love that, right? You know? And I feel like the ladies are just like like they're just like I didn't like it. During the hangout, hour three, verse seven, during the hangout, she said whom? Like, bitch, I'm not a vocabulary teacher. What do you mean, whom? We don't use the phrase whom here, bitch. Prim improper bitch. Never talking to her again. And I'm like, what you sure? I feel like awful, you know? She used him and I'm I am him people. Yeah. I don't necessarily think we're that. I don't think we're that. I'm not writing a thesis, to be fair. But I don't think that is I don't think they're the same thing. I didn't pick up on that. Right? But no. So yeah, couple on couple's hard. And I can't even imagine being older. Like I'm 36 and it's hard. Imagine being 50. Couple on couple at 56? You're making new couple friends at 56? That's crazy. That's crazy. Why don't you have your friend group established at 56? If you're looking for new couple friends at 56, you guys are the throwaways. Because every other 56-year-old couple should have couples for 40 years. They're going to bar mitzfiz, they're going to couples, kids' grandkids' house, you know? Super duper close. Calling aunt and uncle to, you know, the kids are saying auntie and unkie. If you don't have a friend group at 56, something went wrong. Terribly wrong. And I'll be honest with you, I'm not saying dying alone's the funnest. But maybe, you know, at 56, if you're looking for new couple friends, maybe we just call it, you know? Maybe we just, you know, get a hobby. Become more well read. Because finding a couple friend that's 56 and on, that's some dark and gloomy shit. That's some dark and gloomy shit. That's menopause. That's post-divorce. That ain't good. You know, you're talking about your first husband. You know, that's just that ain't gonna work. That's probably not gonna work. So yeah. So I guess the window, you know, if you're looking for new friends, in my opinion, if you're a couple and you're looking for new couple friends, in my opinion, realistically, you got to like 40. You got to like 40. And that's really pushing it. After 40, if you're seeking new couple friends, yeah, that can get murky, man. That can get murky. You might not want to see what's out there. You might not want to see the post-40-year-old couple that doesn't have a friend group yet and is seeking arrangements. You know, there might be some chinks in their armor, you know? Might be a little bit of a checkered past, which is fine. You know, we're not judging that, but you know, maybe, you know, maybe, maybe rethink that, you know. Maybe go back into the role index and maybe try to make things work, you know, maybe try to make amends with some uh some past relationships. Because seeking new post-40, yeah, it can get weird. It can get weird. After my ninth stay at rehab, you know, a little bit of that. A little bit of, you know, I I I was sentenced to eight, but I did four because I was good behavior. It was actually better for me. You know, I really found who I was in there. It was actually, it turned out to be a good thing, you know. You might be hearing those stories. And like, what's your rebuttal to that? You weren't expecting that. What's your rebuttal to I got out early on good behavior? You weren't prepared for that. You didn't, you weren't expecting that at 44 years old in New Jersey on Taco Tuesday night. You weren't expecting to give that rebuttal. So, you know, just tread like you know, no lifeguard on duty post-40. You know what I mean? Like that that's my advice to people post-40 looking for friend groups. Swim. This is America, find that. But there's no lifeguard on duty. We're not gonna hire someone to risk their life for that. That's a you guys thing. That's your prerogative, you know? That's like someone like that's like that's like the journalist that get like decapitated in the mountains of Kabul. We're sad. Super sad. But that's kind of, you know, in the you know, you, you know, there was always that in lingering. That could happen. Super duper sad. Shouldn't have happened. No one deserves that. But that's also, y, you know. You knew, you know, it was always in the back of your mind that that could happen. You know, they didn't, you know, they didn't invade New Jersey. You went, you know, you were in, you know. You were what's the word? You were behind them in enemy lines, which is fine. Totally fine. That's your right. But, you know. So that's my opinion on post-40 hangouts. To me, the 40s pretty much as far as you can go. The answer is realistically about 33. But I'm gonna be fair and say 40, you know, just to be fair, because I really am a fair-minded guy. What would help the kids really are great nucleus? Kids really help the couple on couple hangout. But it's weird, you know. Maybe I'm old school, maybe I, you know, I didn't grow up in a you know, picket fence neighborhood. But like, I don't know, my parents didn't hang out with my friends' parents. I know that's rare. It's about a 50-50 split. Most parents do like have I know it's 50, it's about 50-50, in my opinion, of people in my age group where their friends did hang out with their other significant others. Parents, I don't know why I say significant others, when friends' parents hung out. I know that's not uncommon. I know, but I don't know. I just my parents never did, you know what I mean? But in this day and age, I would imagine that the percentage of hangouts is way higher than it was back then, to be totally fair and honest with you guys. So I would imagine that having kids as the nucleus of the hangout really helps. I would imagine it really helps. Hopefully, you get lucky and you can tolerate these people, because if you can, I would imagine that would be a nightmare. That hasn't happened to us yet. Our kids aren't like that hellbent on hanging out with certain children that we have to hang out with their parents. I'm assuming maybe in the near future it's probably going to happen. I would imagine, and I'm not sure I'm gonna love that. But to be perfectly honest with you, I'm not sure if I, you know, I don't think I'm the best sell either. You know what I mean? I don't think they're gonna love hanging out with me, you know? I don't think that this middle-aged man who's successful and spent $800,000 on his home to avoid having to have conversations with shitheads like me. I don't think he's gonna be thrilled that Tommy just started to hang out with Carmine as well, and they're super vibing. You know what I mean? I don't think he's gonna enjoy me playing on his $2,000 air hockey table, you know? Maybe maybe I'm leaning a little too hard on that, you know what I mean? I don't think he's gonna love sharing his fucking $250 bottle of wine with me. And in his defense, I totally understand. I'm very big into like groups of people, not mixing with other groups of people. And I'm not talking about race, I'm talking about like finances. Like, I don't think a billionaire should have to interact with me. He's a billionaire, he chose to live there so he doesn't have to interact with people like me. I'm actually on board with that. So, like, I'm imagining these people who probably are a little more successful than me to say the least. I don't think they're gonna love me at the hangout either. But in in my defense, I'm not gonna love them either. I don't want to interact with them either. I don't want him to explain that it's a $250 bottle of wine. I don't want to be forced to play air hockey on his fucking regulated, authentic $2,000 air hockey table, you know? I don't want to hear his take on music. I don't want to deal. And he doesn't want to deal, and I don't want to deal, but we're only dealing solely for the purpose so our children can hang out, so we both play the game, of course, but I would imagine that it's not ideal for either of us, in my opinion. Which, you know, what the fuck is that, right?

unknown 17:38

What the fuck is that?

SPEAKER_00 17:40

What even is that dang? We're giving you the opinion card? That's fair. That's fair. But yeah, couples hanging out with other couples that haven't been friends for the last 20 years is interesting. Post 34. Very, very interesting to say the least. Hopefully, hopefully, you get lucky. Quite frankly, like I think I did on Sunday. I think the hangout went great. Were there certain things that I picked up on? Sure. Were there certain things that they picked up on? I would imagine so. I don't think I'm this catch, you know what I mean? I don't think I'm this hot commodity, you know what I mean? I don't think I'm this guy that people should be lining up to hang out with, you know? It's one thing, like, oh, he's funny, you know, but I'm not hanging out with him, you know what I mean? Like, that guy's funny, but he's not allowed in my kitchen. That's fair. I can like his YouTube videos. I see his Insta stories, and that dang gotta get set. But I'm not inviting him in my he's not allowed in my kitchen. I'm obviously hiding my silverware around this guy, you know? And I'm well aware of that. I don't, I don't take offense to that. I probably would steal your silverware if it was authentic silver. Silver's high right now. I wouldn't let me in your kitchen either. If that helps. I'm not delusional of that. I wouldn't let me in my kitchen either. Mommy, mommy, couldn't Carmine's parents come over and all of us can play? Yeah, now he's gotta hear my like fat, funny bullshit. Whoa, nice lamp. You know? Yeah, like, yeah, you're real funny, bro. How's that working out for you? Yeah, yeah, exactly. You know? Nothing worse than that for him. Nothing worse than having to deal with my delusional ass. I'm gonna make it one day, dude. He's like, dude, you're 40. Shut the fuck. Get out of my kitchen. Get out of my kitchen. You stay in the Nanai. You don't come in the main house. You think I'm allowed in the main house? I wouldn't allow me in the main house. I stay outside. I'm in the pool area. I'm not allowed in the real house, and I understand and I respect that. I wouldn't allow me in the real house either. So I understand. I know, I get it. I understand. I get it, but you know, it's tricky. It is tricky. I do hope that when my kids do make the friends and we are forced to interact with their parents, that it goes well. Because it's very, very, very, very complicated hanging out with other couples past 35. You like how I've said a different number every single time. We get the gist. So it's it's 33 to 40. Anything above that, you know, but 33 to 40 is the sweet spot of a lot of things can go wrong. Youngers, easy. 20s, it's like, you're funny. It's like, you know, that's easy. You know what I mean? Like, he likes sports cool, you know, he likes it. The women are like, she likes fireball too. Me also. And everyone hangs out, it's all great. Post 33, the interview process gets a little heavier, you know. They're calling the references, you know what I mean? They're they're checking in, you know. Pre bring resume. They want to see, you know, they want to fact check a little. They have some follow up questions to things that they're reading about you. Whereas in your 20s, that doesn't happen. So, you know, hopefully it goes well for you guys. Hopefully it goes well for you guys. I really, really do hope so. But other than that, that's my that's my take on. That nonsense. That's my take on that nonsense. Gotta get said, guys. Gotta get said. We are in the works right now of having new fun things happen. We are in the works right now of having new fun things happen. New topics. New delivery. New co-host? Co host? Co host? I don't know. You never know. Never say never, gotta get said fans. Never say never. What I will promise you all is it's gonna be fun. What I will promise you all, it's going to be a polished product. What I will promise you all, I am going to give my everything 110% to keep this train rolling and make this train. I don't know. I was gonna say reach the sky. Fuck it. Trains in space, motherfucker. We're taking this train and we're going to the moon. Fuck a rocket ship. But my point is, yes, there are gonna be changes. I am super excited about it. I can't tell you everything yet, because quite frankly, I don't know everything yet, but there are going to be some fun changes around here. Things that make me happy, things that light my fire, things that refuel my love for doing this, and it is very, very, very, very exciting. So I can't wait for that. I hope you guys can't wait for that because I'm just giggity about it, quite frankly. I'm giggity about it, quite frankly. So stay tuned. Fun changes are coming and they're coming fast. That's what she said. How to say it. Nothing like a good old that's what she said. But in all seriousness, guys, this is gonna be amazing. It's gonna be fun. I'm so excited. I'm so so so so so excited. I'm so excited. You guys have no idea. I'm so so so excited. It's gonna be so much fun. I hope you guys had a great Mother's Day. I hope you guys have a great rest of your week. I hope you guys have a great weekend. And until then, I'm out of here. Until next week, same time, same place. I tell you guys.