Introducing Mom Guilt and Entrepreneurship

Jaclyn

Thank you so much for being here . I am with my dear friend, Lyubov Nixon one of my dearest friends on the planet and I've been wanting to talk to you about mom guilt and entrepreneurship , and this episode of the Freq Show , specifically , is titled Mom Guilt is Real , but so Is your Purpose Navigating Motherhood and Entreprene and entrepreneurship and you're the perfect person to talk to about this , because you have four kids , you have a thriving and successful business . You also homeschool your kids , you make homemade bread . You make homemade everything . We geek out over that together, and I want to talk to you about how you navigate . And I want to talk to you about how you navigate being an incredible mother , because I know you are , and being an incredible entrepreneur , because I know you are that too .

Lyubov

Well , thank you , you're welcome . I'm so excited to be here .

Jaclyn

I'm so excited for you to be here too . So can I just launch in with some questions ? Yes , go ahead , all right , first one too . So can I just launch in with some questions ? Go ahead , all right , first one . What ?

Lyubov

does mom guilt mean to you , and when did you first feel it as a business owner ? You know , to be honest , I think I felt it before I even had kids . I think even in pregnancy , because I've been in business for 13 years now .

Jaclyn

Yeah , that's a significant amount of time .

Lyubov

So I've had different types of businesses and I'm on my just in a different phase of business and so now I think mom guilt has come with so much shame and something that I've had to work through . But shame came before mom guilt and I just kind of activated differently when the kids came and I think now mom guilt is an important part of what you need to have and I think it's always getting a bad rap , but I think it's not a bad thing .

Jaclyn

Okay , Go into that please .

Lyubov

So I think , mom guilt is your radar that calls you into alignment , that you need to listen to , that you need to pay attention to and say okay , but am I really doing something that I should be ashamed of , that I should feel bad about ? Am I really damaging the relationship with my kids ? And really look at it and be open to yourself , because sometimes the answer is yes this is not the right thing to do . You need to step back and you need to give your kids more time or um presence , because sometimes presence is such a huge thing .

Lyubov

you know like I work from home and I'm with them 24-7 technically , but my presence isn't always fully with them .

Lyubov

Yeah , because I can walk myself outside so I can take a phone call for work , and they're screaming on the other side of the door and I just keep my composure . So I think you have to look at it and say like , okay , am I aligned , am I fully living to what I need to do ? And sometimes the answer is yes , you're good , they are completely fine . This is just , you know , a season where they're super needy , and then there are seasons where you need to be honest and you need to fix it .

Lyubov

And I think we also need to listen to that . Yeah , oh .

Jaclyn

I completely agree . My Roman's love language is time spent , and so earlier this year , when I was in my first trimester of pregnancy , I was so sick and so energy drained that I would spend time with him physically , but mentally I was just trying to make it through the day and he picked up on that so acutely and there were a couple of weeks where he was like so snotty to me and so crabby and I felt so bad , but then , at the same time , I was like I have got to give myself some grace .

Jaclyn

Here I'm making a human , I'm working on this giant project , I'm trying to be the best mom I can possibly be right now , but there's just not a lot of juice . And so I think being honest with ourselves is so , so important , like you just said , and using mom guilt as a gauge , like am I in alignment here or not , and then also extending that grace to ourselves . If we are in a season of things not being aligned and that being kind of out of our control , you know .

Lyubov

Yeah , and I think mom guilt usually gets a bad rap . Usually it's oh and it's allowed . I think that's the other thing we do as moms . We allow it , yeah , and I think now , because I've lived with it , with shame , with that , comes with it where , oh , I just feel so bad . Well , if you feel so bad , then do something about it .

Lyubov

Yeah , you know it's like you have to be faster taking action than letting that feeling sit . Yeah , and I mean I'm saying this after I've been a mom for , you know , eight and a half years he was born .

Lyubov

He's eight and a half now and so I've had a lot of practice and a lot of life with this mom guilt and with shame that I've had to work through , and I think that's probably the best thing I've done for my kids is work through that guilt , that shame . I'm still working through it because some of it was passed on in a way that wasn't even my intention

Reframing Mom Guilt as Alignment

Lyubov

to receive it and I think Sure .

Jaclyn

Well , and you're one of 11 kids , you're the oldest , so you kind of grew up being a mom too . In some ways , you're very responsible . I'm the oldest , not of 11 , but of three , and I think especially as women and when you are the eldest daughter , whether your parents mean to or not . My parents had no ill intentions , I was just always overly responsible , so it was easy to hand stuff to me .

Jaclyn

It was easy for me to kind of become that pseudo parent and I think that also comes into motherhood . And I relate to you when you said I felt mom guilt before my baby was even born , because I felt that in my first pregnancy I was like , how am I going to be able to work and fulfill my dreams and become a mother and I've talked about this on the podcast before . I had so much fear around becoming a mother because of that , because I want to be two places at once and I want to be excellent in all areas and I do believe you can be excellent as a business owner and as a mother . But it also requires us to give ourselves some grace and understand that there are seasons to things .

Lyubov

And maybe not at the same time because , you're , you're going through these waves and I like to look at it as the ocean , because so much of our life in general is like the wave of the ocean . You have to ride the wave and sometimes and it comes with the moon you probably notice , and if you have children , you know what it's like on a full moon oh it's a full moon .

Jaclyn

Fine , we're going barrel here . Everyone's going crazy . It's going barrel Just forget underwear and clothes .

Lyubov

Everyone's running naked and screaming . That's exactly what happens , just a full moon .

Jaclyn

Okay , that makes sense , but it's it's connected to the way that the water in the body is affected by the moon , and so it's a different all the frequencies change now and but I think life has that where you have your seasons where you're slowing down and you're much more excellent as a mom , and you have a season where you're much more excellent as a business owner , and I think that is okay too .

Jaclyn

I think you can't expect yourself to the end of two years old and three years old and you were like you just wait , because Roman is like four or five months younger and you were so right . That transition from the end of two to three . Their brains are developing so rapidly , they don't have control over their emotions . It's so hard , and so I think all you can do is love your child consistently and unconditionally and , again , throw in a lot of grace . Okay , I want to go to my next question for you , which is have you ever considered walking away from your work to be more present as a mom , and if so , what helped you stay the course ?

Lyubov

I still do every day . I'm ready to quit every day . If everyone in my business quits . I'm like thank God , and at one point I had employees quit several and I've had seasons where , because I have employees , I think it's a very different perspective than the business is me and it depends on me .

Lyubov

So I've had it where the business is me and it depends on me . So if I have employees , I think it's a very different perspective than the business is me and it depends on me . So I've had it where the business is me and it depends on me . So if I stop working , I just stop getting money . So it's technically fine and I can slow down . But this business specifically is with employees and they're expecting a paycheck . They have children , they have families , they have car payments , they have , you know , have rent to pay , and so it's a different kind of pressure .

Lyubov

And so do I want to walk away . Sometimes I honestly pray that God would just take it away so I could . But it's not been his answer right now

Staying True to Your Purpose

Lyubov

, not in the . It's not been his answer right now . And so how I stay the course is just reminding myself that all of just , I look back to see how it was all ordained for me to come specifically in the business that I am in , and I think if you're going to be staying in your business or working a job , you need to be super connected to your purpose in order to be sustained and to be somewhat sane at the end and not lose your spark , your desire for life , you need to find a way to recharge , and that's what I have to do .

Lyubov

I have to recharge and I have to go back to my purpose , and the purpose has to be stronger than the desire to quit .

Jaclyn

And how do you so ? Two-part question how do you recharge and what do you feel like your purpose is in this season ?

Lyubov

Oh , good questions . So I'm an introvert , same , and I recharge by being alone . I love hiking and walking and just being out in nature .

Lyubov

And I get to do that so rarely . It's unbelievable . It's so rare because my time alone is so rare now is so rare now , so I have to be grounding myself with writing instead . I journal every day and I write down kind of part of my purpose in bits and pieces is part of my journaling practice that I've had for now probably six or seven years , and even in the times that I can't get time alone to recharge . That's what probably keeps me the most grounded and connected , and oftentimes I forget my purpose .

Jaclyn

But I think , well , you're so . In it you have a one-year-old , a three-year-old , a six-year-old and an eight-year-old .

Lyubov

Yeah , and it's easy to feel like you're disconnected from your purpose when you're living it . And it's also easy to forget that there's parts of you have multiple purposes , sometimes , even though they're connected . So mine , really . I do believe my purpose is to really work with women and help women .

Jaclyn

I know that that's part of your purpose . As somebody who's known you now for three and a half years or so . I know that's part of your purpose ?

Lyubov

Yes , and specifically I believe that God has a purpose for me to speak to women on how to live with insecurity and not just , you know , get rid of it , because I don't think it's possible .

Lyubov

I think we're just in a world where it's not possible but to know how to live with insecurity and still be confident and be in your most beautiful , flourishing life . And part of that is being a mom , and so I'm also living that , being able to teach my kids on how to be connected with who they are and also give them this beautiful life and teach them , and so . But when you're in the trenches sometimes it's hard to see , like that you're actually living it .

Jaclyn

And I think for the women listening and if there are any men listening to , to normalize this is so important . Like I look at you and you know you're making homemade bread and you're homeschooling your kids and you've got this thriving business and I'm like Lyubov is just super mom , super woman , and you are , but at the same time there are vulnerabilities there .

Jaclyn

And you're still human and you still get stressed , and it's not like your life is without all kinds of challenges . Anybody walking this earth is going to be challenged , but you do such a good job of being so honest and I feel like when you are really overwhelmed , you also reach out too . And I love that about you because I feel like I always want to be that support system for you , but I also feel like you're that support system for me too If I need a little , oh , hey , I'm feeling really overwhelmed or whatever .

Jaclyn

So , okay , I want to go into another area of mom guilt and entrepreneurship , which is kind of navigating the tension between the two , right ? What are some of the ways you've learned to cope with the guilt ? Not silence it , not pretend it's gone , but coexist with it without letting it drive .

Lyubov

That's a great question . Um , yeah , I think I'm not even realizing . You know how I'm doing it . I think I've just focused on the now and just today , I think over the last .

Jaclyn

That's a really good tip too .

Lyubov

So I've come , I'm on the end of a very intense , very difficult three-year season , really two-year season , but the first year was a really hard and now this is the end of the third year of like a hard season , and so both in business and I also went through a pregnancy . That was a really rough pregnancy for me . And now my baby's 13 months .

Jaclyn

And she's so gorgeous .

Lyubov

I love her so much . She's really funny , of course she is , she's got this funny side . So I'm coming out of this very difficult season and I remember going back to some of the hardest days where I am super pregnant , sleeping on the couch letting kids watch TV , just so I can get through the day energetically trying to feed them when they're refusing to eat For all the food that I cook them . They're so picky .

Lyubov

They're so picky , and so through that season I developed this practice , without really intentionally developing , but it's really . I'm just focusing on today , and if I'm not doing a good job today , then you know what , tomorrow I'm going to do 1% better , and so I don't know . If you read the book Atomic Habits , he talks about 1% , and so to me I adapted that and to me it's really helped , because then it's not overwhelming . I'm not going to be , you know , super mom tomorrow .

Lyubov

I can be crappy today , but tomorrow I'm going to be not so crappy . The next day I'm going to be a little better the next day I'm going to be . Oh , I'm good today . I'm a good mom today . The next day I'm going to be very good mom today , the next day , great mom . The next day extraordinary . The next day , great mom , the next day extraordinary .

Jaclyn

The next day . Exceptional and so .

Lyubov

I think I've allowed myself to give these like baby steps .

Jaclyn

You know what it was a really hard day .

Lyubov

I'm like everything sucks . So some days I literally say you know what guys , nothing is working . Today we're having so many meltdowns before Mommy Dragon comes out .

Jaclyn

How about we just do a reset , mommy Dragon .

Lyubov

Yeah , my kids are really into dragons right now . Yeah , that's perfect , and so I'm like I'm feeling the dragon come out . So then I'm

Motherhood Success and Business Waves

Lyubov

like you know we need a reset , and so allowing myself just to do 1% better today than I did yesterday really helped me to be more present and focus on just what do I have to get done today ? Just fix the next best move . And that practice came out of a very difficult season where I was extremely stressed , very overwhelmed and I just had to do okay , what is my next best ?

Jaclyn

move and you did that consistently and I saw you through that season and it was extremely hard and I feel your energy now lightening , like you're just not carrying so much .

Jaclyn

But it's hard when you've got really little kids in a business and you're being pulled in a million directions and your husband is super successful and he's been traveling for work , and then you're home with four babies . It's just like it's a lot . It's a day by day thing , okay . Next question Do you ever feel like society gives moms less permission to be ambitious than dads , and how do you handle that double standard ?

Lyubov

You know , someone once changed my mind about how I used to answer that question . Oh , I think that we women give ourselves a double standard . Oh , and I think we allow that through comparison because men don't compare themselves as much as I think women compare themselves to each other . I don't think they do either . I mean , they do compare , but it's very like basic .

Lyubov

It's very surface level , like women do it on like this deep level of comparison where it's like , girl , just give yourself some room and her she's trying her best . And I think you know if we could be in the world where how can you win and I win , and how can we celebrate each other's wins instead of I'm going to win so you could just , I'm going to you're going to lose just so I could win , and it's not okay for so anyway .

Jaclyn

I think Our women's group is the opposite of that it is . We are cheering each other on .

Lyubov

I've seen so much in the society in general , this like double standard , and I think we as women , we accept that as the thought and I think I've moved beyond accepting it as the thought . I think you just need to have a standard for yourself and stop caring and carrying and holding to what anyone else could have done . And I think when you simplify it and you just focus on well , how can I just be good at being a mom first , then move on to the next thing ? You're no longer stacking things on top of yourself .

Jaclyn

Well , and I love that throughout this podcast so far , you keep taking the responsibility back . It's our mindset , it's our decision , it's our ability to take action , and take action quickly , because that gives us the power back , rather than saying , well , I feel mom guilt and I can't do anything about it , or I have these thoughts running through my head and I don't know how to switch it . We have so much power and when we take that power back , even though it can be scary at first and it can feel like a lot .

Jaclyn

That gives us so much autonomy to be the women that we feel we need to be , and I've talked to you about this before .

Jaclyn

I have struggled with you know , do I become a stay at home mom because I love my son so much ? But I also know I'm a better mom when I have gone and done the creative work that fills my soul and then I'm so much more present and engaged with him . So it gives me that ability and I feel like I've dealt with so much guilt around that . I've talked to my husband about it and my husband is like , just let that go . That is not like , don't worry about it , but when you love something that much and you've got it times four , I'm about to have it times two but when you love something that much , it's natural to feel torn between two worlds . But I think if we can ease up and take a step back and see the aerial view of I am such a better mom and human being when I am full and I have taken time for myself , Even if it's just a few minutes of journaling or like a good shower .

Jaclyn

I say I'm going through the car wash .

Lyubov

Yeah , like a really good shower .

Jaclyn

Like I exfoliate , I do the moisturizer , all the things I come out a different person , but those moments make me such a better mom and I think also in society and I know growing up watching my mom , my mom felt like she could not work and be a really present and engaged mom , and that was based off of a false belief from her mom , and so it goes back generations .

Jaclyn

It absolutely does , yeah , and I think you and I in some ways , and in our friendship too , and in talking all of this out ,

Practical Tips for Mom Entrepreneurs

Jaclyn

we're breaking some of those generational curses that have been accidentally handed down to us and it doesn't mean it's easy . It doesn't mean that the mom guilt doesn't surface sometimes , but I love the idea of using it as a gauge and something that could be helpful rather than something that induces shame .

Lyubov

Yeah , absolutely .

Jaclyn

So now let's talk a little bit about mindset and frequency . So now let's talk a little bit about mindset and frequency . How has motherhood shifted your ?

Lyubov

beliefs around worth work or what success really looks like . I think it taught me how to ask better questions .

Jaclyn

Ooh okay , that's a really good takeaway .

Lyubov

Okay , I think you have to maximize your time so well I , when you see and hear your child repeat what you say , there's nothing that will make you change your behavior and your words faster , yeah . And yours maybe is still a little bit little , but when they start , coming out .

Jaclyn

He repeats so many phrases back to me it gets worse .

Lyubov

It gets worse because the mannerisms come back . Now my kids eat and then they say stuff , oh , I don't eat leftovers . Guess who doesn't eat leftovers in our family ? Your husband .

Jaclyn

He hates leftovers . Guess who doesn't eat leftovers in our family ? Your husband . He hates leftovers .

Lyubov

Now my eight-year-old is saying I don't eat the same meat twice in a row , two days in a row , meaning you can't have chicken yesterday and chicken today , even if it's cooked different ways . You can't Guess who else does that . That I've also cooked for my entire marriage . Because he doesn't like he needs fish two times a week . He doesn't like to have chicken one day , chicken the next day , or steak one day , steak the next day . He has to have a different meat because he gets bored or whatever . The reason is because he's an adult and he can have a choice . But that's so . When he starts verbalizing it at dinner and my husband's looking at me and I'm like well , I'm like I'm gonna wring your neck've told you this you can't say stuff like that around them , because he would , and then that's what I have to deal with .

Lyubov

So now , guess who's eating leftovers ? The mama . No my husband also . Oh good , Because he's like see , I'm eating leftovers . You see , Rolo , I'm eating leftovers . Guess who's eating this too , Sometimes like I don't love it , but we got to eat it because we have a fridge full of leftovers .

Jaclyn

Yes , and also I don't want to make a homemade meal every single night after a hard day .

Lyubov

It's so nice to be able to batch cook a little bit . I wish I could , yeah .

Jaclyn

I know , and sometimes I do too . But at the same time , if I can like make double one night and then have leftovers the next night , I love it . So but going back to that question like what does success look like to you right now ? If you were to go through a week on a Friday evening , how do you say this week was successful ? Because X , y and Z ? Is it something that you feel ? Is it something that you've accomplished ? Is it a combination of both ?

Lyubov

It's a combination of both .

Jaclyn

Yeah .

Lyubov

But it goes back . It takes me back to the time that , again journaling , I wrote out . This was probably 14 , 15 years ago . I did it with a friend and I wrote out in a kind of like a spider web .

Lyubov

You basically do a spider web and then , in the middle of the page , blank page , you write on woman , and that's me , and not just woman , the perfect woman . And then you write out a little bubble to the side that goes friend , a little bubble that says mother , daughter , um , career and so . And then from that bubble you write in what kind of mother you are I am present , I'm loving , I give hugs , I cook dinner every night , I make cookies from scratch , and so you know , from work , I'm a business owner , I make this much money , I have freedom to do this , uh , traveling , creative like you . You write all these , these adjectives and all these descriptive words For each of the roles you play , for each of the roles , and there's usually four , so it's career , motherhood , wife , friendship , friendship , and then Daughter , and then the kind of person you are , okay .

Lyubov

So , because I think it's important to also have like okay , what kind of person you are . So , because I think it's important to also have like okay , what kind of human am I ? The qualities you have . And so I go back to that because I recently found it . Oh , I love this , and I've done an update , I think , every five years , of what it is , and it's a very close and very similar to what my perfect woman is then and today .

Lyubov

And I have to look back and say this week was successful and it has nothing to do with how difficult it was . It has to do with did I have time to spend with my kids ? Did I have the ability and the option to homeschool them ? A week ago I took them to the zoo . We went out to eat . I didn't have to think about okay , how much is this going to cost , and count my pennies , which is one of the things that I've worked on . Like I have enough for our needs . I can go to a restaurant , take them and feed four children who don't eat half the stuff that they order .

Lyubov

You know , and then being able to drive a car that I've just really loved and enjoyed , and being in this gratitude for I have my time with them , I'm watching them grow Maybe this is TMI , but like having my toddler sit there and you know I'm the one wiping his butt and not someone else on a toilet , like that little connection , while they still let me help them , you know and being able to put my babies to bed at night , being able to see them all of them for dinner , and , at the same time , as a businesswoman , it means I have money that comes in every day , that I'm able to also watch my bank account and pay certain things and be able to buy the things that I need to buy for the family , for myself , and so I am living it now .

Jaclyn

Yeah . So , success is a combination of feeling present with your children , but also seeing , even if it's just tiny increments , progress in your business . Yes , next question , and I think we should go into the practical and tactical . Let's do it .

Lyubov

Yes .

Jaclyn

What are some boundaries or practices that you have experienced as being game changers for you in managing your time and energy ?

Lyubov

Doing one thing at a time .

Jaclyn

I no longer believe in multitasking oh multitasking is a scam I don't know who invented it . Yeah , or if you want to feel , scatterbrained multitask , it's .

Lyubov

It's not a thing you have to multitask as a mom , because sometimes you have to , especially with a newborn and having to breastfeed and doing all the things while breastfeeding , but it's a scam . So when I can , I just do one thing at a time . Yeah , I love that advice and it's very hard . I know it's so much hard , because you want to do everything .

Jaclyn

But I find that when I focus on just one thing at a time , I don't feel that deep anxiety .

Lyubov

Yes .

Jaclyn

Or I don't feel pulled in a million directions , I don't feel scattered . Okay , how do you explain your work to your kids and how do you hope they remember this season of your life ?

Lyubov

I take them to work with me . I love it . They ask me all the time if they can work for my company . I love it . They know my team . Once they asked Because , you know , sometimes I bring them with me and this is the joy of homeschooling is ? You know ? We got to go deal with this right now and I just take them with me in the car and I got to go deal and then they ask me oh , is this your favorite worker ? Because I have employees who are like oh , is she your favorite one ? Because I have employees who are like , oh , is she your favorite one ? They ask me to work for my business

Shifting Energy and Finding Balance

Lyubov

and sometimes , you know , I'll let them shred some papers and give them for the bucks .

Jaclyn

So they're like yes , I'm gonna work , yeah , to incorporate them .

Lyubov

So they do see things and they remember , and I think I'm already seeing it . I hope that they- .

Jaclyn

They're gonna be so proud of you and what you've accomplished .

Lyubov

I seeing it . I hope that they're going to be so proud of you and what you've accomplished . I hope that they , I hope that they remember it with good memories , this this time of our life , because I know it won't always be like that . Sometimes in the future , sometime in the future , I won't have to go on site as much and I won't have to be on the phone as much , because I'll delegate that role to someone else . But right now , I hope they see the work ethic and I hope and I know they are seeing it already because they're always talking about I'm going to start this business , I'm going to , I got a 3D printer , I'm going to start making toys and selling them , and so they're already really good salespeople . That's incredible .

Jaclyn

I love that . I love that . I love that . Okay , If you are talking to another mompreneur and she came to you and said I feel like I'm failing at being a mom and failing at being an entrepreneur , what would ?

Lyubov

you say to her I would say , pick one , fix it , then go to the next .

Jaclyn

Okay .

Lyubov

I think when you feel like you're failing at both , you are because that feeling is probably correct . You're probably drawn to something that's not enough , and so you need to first find your grounding . So just get stuff cleared out of your space . So I think for me , when I'm overwhelmed and I'm failing at both , it's usually a mess in the house .

Jaclyn

I know how that feels .

Lyubov

Office . So you clear your purse of stuff , old receipts , things . You just start throwing stuff out that's not serving you , that doesn't you know belong where it is right now . Usually in that case I go like hardcore and organize my house . My kitchen is organized , my entry points of the house like we usually come through the garage , so that gets gets organized . My entry front door gets organized and cleared so like no junk and stuff , my kitchen gets organized and then yeah , organize your physical space and then the mental space but I go hardcore , like I get my personal life in order because that , to me , is the priority .

Lyubov

So when I'm like okay , business is falling apart , things are crashing , I like go hardcore . I just forget everything , forget homeschool , forget whatever else . Everything can wait . I just get everything organized , all the laundry is done and then , when things and spaces are clear there are no baskets , things on the floor waiting for me to make decisions Then I find that 50% of my problems go away because that clutter of unfinished business personally carries into the business . And then I clean the kitchen . When the kitchen is clear , I get into . Like you need to start doing something creative . Then you need to cook , you need to eat . I think that , as moms , we always forget to eat and then forget to drink the water .

Lyubov

And only then , when you feel like your space is okay , you've taken care of the essentials for your family and your home and yourself because the home really is , you're doing that for yourself Then you can start looking at and saying , okay , I need a babysitter , I need to walk away when the kids are asleep , I need to take time , sit down and make decisions . And then you need to make decisions very quickly , even if you don't like them .

Jaclyn

My stepdad says I make a decision and then I don't look back Like you , just deal with the consequences and you keep moving forward , and I love that . Okay , as we wrap up today's podcast , I'm so grateful that you took this time . Thank you , thank you . I have one last question for you , which is how can someone shift their frequency ? Well , let's make this more specific as a mother who runs a business and has children , what is the fastest way to shift your frequency for the better in those tough moments ?

Lyubov

Well , listen to your app , of course .

Final Advice and Frequency Shifts

Jaclyn

Thank you , that was a nice plug .

Lyubov

But I do , I actually do , I do it , thank you . And so I think you need to have triggers . So like triggers have a negative meaning but also like to flip it and have a positive trigger . So like you use mom guilt redefined as this is your radar on where you need to improve , same with triggers you need to trigger your mind and your body into a different state .

Jaclyn

And .

Lyubov

I think music does that , which is where you have your frequency and I like the frequency , just the music part , because it's more just frequency for you and one minute frequencies because I know you're busy .

Lyubov

I think you need those where it kind of jolts your body into action , and I think you need something that's powerful . And so I have , over the years , have had songs that kind of like snap me back into it . There's one called Conqueror , and when the high note goes with the Conqueror part , just like , yes , I'm a Conqueror , we're going to go finish this business deal . And we're going to go finish this business deal and we're going to go finish this stuff that we got to do today . And so you need something that changes your physical state .

Lyubov

And sometimes it's going for a walk . But I think when you just don't overcomplicate it , you just change your frequency by dance party with your kids If you're home with the kids , or tune in and listen to something that triggers you into a different state physically . So , movement and sound .

Jaclyn

And we'll link the Freq app , but before we go , I want you to plug your business and where can people connect with you , cause I know they're going to want to .

Lyubov

So I hang out on Instagram probably the most , and on Instagram it's at Lubov Nixon . And I'm going to link that in the show notes too , my business is a residential home cleaning so here , local to Phoenix , and it's called Clean Lemon .

Jaclyn

And it's all clean cleaning supplies , which is a huge differentiator .

Lyubov

Non-toxic products is our specialty and I have a very good team so it's very high quality service . And that's , I think , something that's super important to me and it's rare to find . And so it's at clean lemon company on Instagram .

Jaclyn

And I will link all of that in the show notes so that people can connect with you and hire you easily . Thank you so much , my beautiful friend . Thank you , yes , all right , thank you for listening and we will catch you in the next episode . Thank you so much for listening to the Freq Show with Sam Thurmond and me , Jaclyn Steele Thurmond . We would love to connect with you via our website , beckonlivingcom , and on social media . You can find us on Instagram and TikTok at Beckon Living and you can join our email list to receive uplifting messages , podcast and business updates and discounts on high-frequency products just for our freqy community . Cheers to high-frequency living .