072 The age of connectivity was supposed to give everyone a voice and spread liberal values around the world, but instead public discourse in the digital town square has been reduced to 280 characters and cynical memes shared with strangers.  In contrast to the dumpster fire of social media is the rich tradition of a salon culture that thrived during the age of enlightenment.  From the ferment of these social gatherings flowed a new world of reason and possibility, including egalitarian systems of self governance and the inalienable rights that have come to define the West, but are now under threat.

Innate to the experience of salons is the pursuit of meaning, connection and beauty.  As more of life is lived online there are fewer spaces in the real world where diverse people and perspectives can engage in healthy and spirited exchange about things that truly matter.  In this episode of Awake In Relationship I speak with Justine Kolata, a philosopher, salonnière and author of In Pursuit of the Beautiful Soul about reviving the art of conversation as an antidote to online toxicity and restoring hope in a brighter future through holding space for beauty and heartfelt dialogue.

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071 As we transition to fall and celebrate thanksgiving (In Canada) it seems like a natural time to focus on the hearth, the place of warmth, family and community. The constellation of people we share our world with, especially our chosen family, are always reflecting something back to us, some important feedback. In this short monologue Silas Rose explores the mirror like quality of our close relationships, known in the Tibetan Buddhist tradition as the Mandala Principle. Like a Buddha in the centre of a colourful sacred circle by bringing awareness to every conversation we can transform our habitual patterns and reactivity.  When we change, the image in the mirror also changes. In this way our circle of relationships expands and we can experience greater openness and joy. 

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070 The road to original and impactful work can be long and lonely. The digital age has enabled more freedom, creativity and opportunity, but also epidemic levels of disconnection and distraction. It is estimated that 20 percent of North Americas are involved in some early stage enterprise or work online.  Even more are opting for remote or hybrid work. When we are literally switching screens every 3 minutes new strategies and tools are needed to help us access our potential and do deep work.

In this episode of Awake In Relationship I speak with Steve Puri, CEO of The Sukha, a productivity app and community of remote workers to discuss hacks for getting into flow, the creative process and building healthy relationships and teams online and off. Steven draws on insights from a long career as a producer and studio executive at DreamWorks and 20th Century Fox for being more productive and getting to the real work that feeds your soul.

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Credit: Music used in this episode intro by Grand_Project

069 The heart is not just a pump, it is also the tender center of our being we most often guard and long to liberate.  As young children we got to experience the wonders of life through an open heart, but also the pain of separation and in some cases, betrayal. The process of adulting in a materialistic culture necessitates constructing elaborate strategies and conceptual shells to navigate the chaos of life and keep us safe.  However, the more we identify with our thoughts and live life from head, the more disconnected we become from our true nature and sense of aliveness. The desire for wholeness demands an inner journey into the deep heart.

In this episode of Awake In Relationship I speak with Dr John J Prendergast, non dual spiritual teacher, psychotherapist and author of The Deep Heart: Your Portal into Presence and Your Deepest Ground about the archetypal spiritual journey of restoring connection with the subtle and profound wisdom of the heart. In this conversation we also discuss the intersection of psychotherapy and a grounded approach to spirituality in working through trauma and internal blocks to loving more fully.

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Credit: Music used in this episode intro by Orangery

068  The spiritual journey is not all love and light. The more one commits to waking up, the more life is punctuated by times of intense loneliness and a longing to be liberated from the sense of separateness. The nature of love is expansive and free flowing. Only when we fixate and try to constrain it does it become transactional and begin to sour. Without warning the transcendent joy of a passionate love affair can turn to self doubt and neediness.

According to the Buddhist tantric tradition, love is a vast storehouse of energy that exists beyond the dualistic barrier of ego clinging or relationship status and is available to all who are brave enough to seek its truth. By becoming familiar with the open nature of love we can dance and communicate with others with greater delight and ease. In this episode of Awake In Relationship I speak with Buddhist author, teacher and returning guest, Susan Gillis Chapman on the non dual, indestructible nature of love and cutting through ego’s obsessive strategy to possess it.

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Credit: Music used in this episode intro by Grand_Project 

067 Every rose has its thorn... so too, there is no intimacy without first facing the Shadow. In the background of our quest to be known and held deeply in relationship is a murky and sometimes dangerous territory. The Shadow contains a lifetime of unmet needs and raw emotion that can resurface abruptly in situations involving power, money and sex. It also holds a vast treasure trove of latent gifts and the potential of love waiting to be expressed if we are brave enough to look.

In a time when 50 percent of marriages end in divorce and1/3 of us live alone shadow work may be the secret to transforming old wounds and self defeating patterns and realizing our deepest desires in conscious intimacy and connection.  In this episode of Awake In Relationship we welcome back Dr Connie Zweig, retired Jungian and author of Romancing the Shadow to discuss the path of shadow work and waking up in our relationships. 

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066 After an extended hiatus Awake In Relationship is back on the AIR with season 3!  In this short episode Silas discusses the origins of the loneliness epidemic and the evolution of his mission in the brave new world of super intelligent machines to help people reclaim time and attention from devices to invest in conscious relationships and deep work in the real world. 

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065 In this episode of REWIND we revisit an interview about mens struggle to find a generative form of masculinity in a rapidly changing world. FYI we will be taking a break from regular publishing over summer and be back in fall with the launch of season 3. Stay tuned!

In almost every metric of success including education, career advancement and earning potential men have fallen behind the opposite sex. In this conversation I speak with David Jurasek, psychotherapist and mens coach about the current state of boys and men and the often overlooked causes of antisocial male behaviour, under performance and inability to access emotional help. We also discuss ways conscious men can re-access the power latent in their biology and psyche in healthy ways that serve others and open to greater love and a sense of purpose.

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064 Long before the pandemic many of us were practicing some form of social distancing. Modern life is rich in connectivity, yet so often lacking in the felt sense of connection and belonging. In the transition to the digital world more of life is being lived online and we are more lonely than ever. Like a muscle that never gets flexed, the close relationships that we rely on in good times and bad can quickly atrophy if we are not paying attention. In this instalment of ON AIR host Silas Rose discusses the importance of social fitness and reclaiming time and focus from the algorithms for real world relationships.

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063 When war and rumours of war are everywhere in the news how we personally relate to uncertainty and show up for others matters more than ever. The temptation to harden our hearts and join the chorus of polarizing voices is difficult to resist. However, it doesn’t matter what side of a conflict we identify with or the opinions we hold. Toxic certainty, hatred and fear are contagious and the real enemies of peace. Spiritual warriorship has existed in eastern and western traditions for thousands of years to show the way of bravery. In times of crisis the spiritual warrior rises above aggression and looks within to transform a fearful mind in the cradle of compassion.

In this episode of Awake In Relationship I speak with returning guest Susan Gillis Chapman, Buddhist teacher and author of The 5 Keys of Mindful Communication and a new book, Which Way Is Up?: Finding Heart in the Hardest of Times, due to be published in June 2024. In this conversation we discuss the transformative power of compassion and qualities of a modern spiritual warrior living in times of great change  and fear. We also discuss contemplative practices for invoking the heart of bravery and leading with love.

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062 From Silicone Valley tech bros to stressed out single moms, many people are proclaiming the therapeutic virtues of micro dosing for enhancing creativity and mental health. Micro dosing involves the consumption of a sub perceptual, fractional quantity of psilocybin or LSD, typically 1/5th to 1/20th of a recreational dose. Once vilified, interest in psychedelics and psychedelic therapy has exploded in recent years leading to a number of high profile FDA approved drug trials for treatment resistant depression, anxiety and addictions.

In a time when an epidemic of loneliness and despair is spreading like wildfire could micro dosing help nudge our perceptual reality towards a more hopeful future and richer relationships? In this episode of Awake In Relationship I speak with returning guest Jim Kragtwyk, a registered clinical counsellor and educator who specializes in psychedelic integration work. In this discussion we talk about the current research and possible psycho-social and emotional benefits of micro dosing for overcoming self imposed barriers to deeper creativity, growth and relationships.

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061 The modern world is filled with connectivity, yet for so many people the need for authentic connection goes unmet. Even in a long term relationship we can hide our vulnerability and true desires, sometimes for decades. When we avoid having the important and risky conversations with the people we love we miss a precious opportunity for deeper intimacy and healing old wounds. The questions we ask have the power to illuminate and transform any relationship for the better.

In this episode of Awake In Relationship I speak with Topaz Adizes, an Emmy Award-winning director, experience design architect and author of 12 Questions For Love: A Guide to Intimate Conversations and Deeper Relationships. Since 2014 Topaz has been documenting intimate conversations in an celebrated series called THE AND, which has been viewed by millions of people online.  In this chat we talk about the nature of love, the modern hunger for intimacy and how to hold space for conversations that matter. We also discuss how the questions we ask can help us see loved ones in a new light.

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060  For anyone who has loved and lost you know how much it can hurt when the fairy tale ends. Neuroscience has shown that social and emotional pain stimulate the same regions of the brain as physical pain. However, while heartbreak might be the price we pay at the end of a relationship it doesn’t mean we have to suffer. The grief that follows breaking up is an invitation to mend our most primary relationship, the one we have with ourselves.

In this episode of Awake In Relationship I speak with returning guest Mel Cassidy, a relationship coach and educator who focuses on ethical non monogamy, about the subtle art of breaking up and tending to a broken heart. We also discuss how to know when it is time to end a relationship and how to exit in a compassionate and clean way.

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059 Artists and creators have always held a special station in life, even if their work goes unnoticed.  It is the artist who sees the details of life that we often miss, speaks truth to power and imagines into existence new ways of being. Central to the creative process is the source of inspiration, the Muse. When the Muse is present middling art and science is elevated to greatness. The Muse awakens the senses and ignites revolutions.

In this instalment of ON AIR the host of Awake In Relationship Silas Rose explores the critical role of the artist and Muse in breaking through the current state of cultural stagnation and polarization to imagine a hopeful future again.

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058 If your New Year's resolutions include improving your social fitness this holiday replay is for you!

The promise of online social platforms was access to an infinite pool of new friends and possible mates.  However, rather than making the search for love easier, the apps have trained our brains to select connections  based on the shallowest metrics. For anyone with a heartfelt desire to find love the daily grind of swiping left and right can feel soul destroying. Authenticity and real intimacy requires letting go of our curated online personas and masks to reveal the truth of our inner experience at every stage of relationship.

In this episode of Awake In Relationship I speak to the cofounder and lead coach of Authentic Relating Training International Ryel Kestano about using the tools and practice of Authentic Relating in the murky realms of dating. We also discuss the role of curiosity and following the thread of aliveness in conversations to quickly build trust and connection on the first date.

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057 Ecological anxiety a is new diagnostic label describing a complex of physical and emotional symptoms related to existential dread and despair around the state of the environment. Extreme weather events like wild fires, floods and hurricanes in combination with politicians slow walking meaningful change is causing many, especially young people to give up on a hopeful vision for the future.

In this episode of Awake In Relationship I speak with returning guest David Segal, therapist and co founder of Human Nature Counselling, a not for profit society with a mission to provide accessible nature based therapy for youth and adults. This conversation explores some of the unique challenges we face as humans living through the Climate crisis and identifies common physical and emotional symptoms of ecological anxiety and grief. We also discuss proactive ways for processing the collective trauma of the climate crisis and finding the will to take action in community and our innate connection to the natural world.

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056 The Oct 7th attack on Israel has ignited a new hot war in the middle east and a polarizing  information war online. For many people around the world the conflict  between Israel and Palestine touches old wounds of injustice as a cycle of religious violence repeats again and claims more innocent lives. If anything has been learned from this war it is that history is complex and good and evil are indistinguishable in the fog of war.

In this instalment of ON AIR Silas Rose, the host of Awake In Relationship, reflects on the unspoken grief at the centre of his Jewish identity and the prescient need to recognize and interrupt the chain reactions of suffering and violence, beginning with our own complex and sometimes paradoxical emotions.

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055 There are few things in life more ephemeral than money. Those who seek an enduring happiness and freedom through a path of awakening often find themselves rich in spirit, but constantly struggling to keep the lights on, literally. This is especially true for creators, social entrepreneurs and heart based business owners who lead with their values. Survival and success requires that we first go through the fire of reconciling our relationship with money. Rather than being the root of all evil, money can be a natural expression of the inherent richness at the core of the human spirit, even in an unjust economic system. 

In this episode of Awake In Relationships I speak with Mark Silver, business mentor and author of Heart centred business: Healing from a toxic business culture so your small business can thrive about the possibilities that arise when we put love and our deepest values at the center of our work and business. We also discuss some of the unconscious blocks that prevent spiritual entrepreneurs from achieving financial growth and how to re-align our heart with the income and the impact in the world we desire.

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054 The struggle to reconcile the better angels of our nature with powerful, earthly desires of the flesh is familiar to anyone on a spiritual path. Historically vilified and repressed by religious intuitions and the state, our sexual energy often hides in the shadows. Unexamined, it remains as a juvenile object of fascination or worse, a corrupting influence to avoid at all costs.

The sexual revolution cast off centuries of rigid norms around sex, yet half a century later instead of liberation we have fallen into what many experts have called a ‘sex recession’, especially among young adults. A legacy of trauma, internalized shame and fear around sex endures and has blocked many from experiencing the full potential of their sexuality for connection, creativity and transcendence.

In the episode of Awake In Relationship I speak with Indus Piche, transpersonal therapist and sacred sexuality teacher, about healing the  hidden religious and cultural blocks to sexual expression and freedom. We also discuss practical steps to reclaiming our sexual energy as a source of empowerment in daily life and spiritual growth.

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053  Since time immemorial humans have danced in tribal and shamanic ceremonies for healing and social harmony.  The rhythmic beat of a djembe or a subwoofer connects us with the internal rhythm of the heart and entrains us with others. When we move together we co regulate our nervous systems in times of high stress. All over the planet the phenomena of ecstatic dance is breaking down barriers to connection and building diverse communities. In a time of great uncertainty dance is the perfect medicine for casting off fear and reconnecting to joy.

In this instalment of Awake In Relationship I speak with Shauna Devlin, the founder of Dance Your Ability, a Not for Profit organization that is bringing conscious dance to marginalized populations including elders and the differently abled. Shauna trained in 5 Rhythms with Gabrielle Roth and has rocked dance floors for over 20 years. In this conversation we explore the many facets and forms of conscious dance from the perspective of a seasoned facilitator and DJ.  We also discuss the power of music and moving together for healing old wounds and how to make dance medicine more accessible to those who need it most.


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052 For decades people have been leaving traditional religious institutions in droves to pursuit a more direct path to enlightenment through eastern practices like meditation and yoga.  In this lonely world it can be intoxicating to find a community that feels like home and provides a sense of safety and support to explore your spiritual longing in depth. If you are fortunate enough to connect with a teacher or mentor it might even feel like destiny calling.

In many traditions the teacher/student relationship is considered sacred because unlike other worldly relationships an authentic spiritual teacher can see through our BS and offer a glimpse into the ultimate view, our true nature beyond dualistic thought and ego clinging.  However, the highest bliss of devotion also contains the possibility of a poison pill that neither student or teacher are prepared to swallow.

Great realization doesn’t necessarily mean great emotional intelligence or the absence of the shadow. The shadow is a Jungian term for the unconscious mind where we store our deepest family secrets, repressed emotions, unmet desires, and also our unexpressed potential.  We only become aware of the shadow when it is activated in intimate relationships that involve power, sex and money.

What is a spiritual path for if not to bring to the light the most hidden aspects of ourselves? Yet so many spiritual communities are blindsided when allegations of clergy abuse surface. In this episode of Awake In Relationship I speak with Dr. Connie Zweig, author of Meeting the Shadow on the Spiritual Path: The dance of darkness and light in our search for awakening, about the archetypal quest for transcendence and the inevitable disillusionment that results when divinity mixes with human fallibility.  We also discuss some of the lessons learned from patterns of misconduct in the west and how recover trust in the teacher student dynamic and joy on the path of awakening through shadow work.


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051 In this episode of REWIND we revisit a conversation with relationship expert and coach Mel Cassidy focused on creating health boundaries.  Personal boundaries are a natural part of any relationship, but rarely are they discussed openly until a line has been crossed.  

After Covid lockdowns many people have discovering their edge the hard way.  In this episode of AIR I speak with Mel Cassidy, a relationship coach who focuses on polyamory and honest non monogamy, about the art of negotiating agreements and boundaries, especially in complex relationships.  We also explore how trauma shows up in intimacy and how to use mindfulness and the messages arising from our somatic experiences to guide towards our deepest needs and desires in relationship.

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050 ON AIR is a short monologue where Silas digs deeper into some of relational themes covered on the podcast and current affairs, Artificial Intelligence is all the buzz after the release of Chat GBT4 by Open AI in the fall of 2022. This version caught many technologists by surprise as it was able to pass the bar exam, right code in seconds and engage in human like dialogue with ease. It is now possible for anyone with an internet who is lonely to form complex, emotionally bonded relationships with non human chat bots. 

The birth of a new super intelligence make possible a golden age, freeing humanity from sickness, poverty and war.  However, we have been given godlike power, without the compassion and wisdom of the gods. Snap Chat, Microsoft, Facebook and Google are racing to add AI functionality to their platforms to drive engagement. Whoever controls the most powerful Ai holds the ring of power.
 

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049 There are few personal growth paths harder than starting a business. Social entrepreneurs who care deeply about the relationships they have with their clients can find that the line between selling and serving sometimes gets blurry. Those new to business often under value their work and avoid marketing like the plague, limiting their income potential and impact in the world .

In this episode I speak with Tad Hargrave, business mentor for the Marketing for Hippies membership community about practical ways to communicate your value and get noticed in a noisy global marketplace without selling your soul. We also discuss some of the myths and hidden motives behind popular relationship marketing tactics and a simple 3 step formula for marketing that centers on authenticity and finding alignment with the people you most want to serve.

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048  Just like the natural world the information ecosystem we rely on daily for important news and meaning making is under threat. The internet was supposed to democratize access to human knowledge and wisdom, Instead, once trusted gatekeepers of information and moral authorities have been replaced by millions of self appointed experts, online content creators and bots.  This has led to a proliferation of low quality information, propaganda, and sometimes bold faced lies. The truth is harder than ever to find and verify. Without shared truths the  consensus reality we occupy falls prey to the proclamations of those with the biggest platform or loudest voice. 

In this episode of Awake In Relationship I speak with returning guest Buddhist author and teacher Susan Gillis Chapman about the search for truth and meaning in a time when many of the stable ontological reference points of daily life are dissolving. In this discussion we explore the loss of knowledge keepers and the possibility of an experiential truth arising from contemplative disciplines like self inquiry, debate and mindfulness meditation.  We also talk about overcoming toxic certainty and how to create safe spaces for important conversations that restore a sense of shared truths.

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