The Toya Talks Podcast
The education system teaches us to learn and recall information and at the end of it we are tested and expected to then pass exams. After all said and done the reality is, we are supposed to get a job at the end of it. I was unaware of the difficulties I would encounter at work especially as a Black Woman. How do I navigate work and how do I keep a job? Education institutions do not prepare you for work, racism, bullying, and oppressive managers in the workplace. Where the education system has not prepared you, I will. Toya Talks is a platform birthed on my day to day uploads on Snapchat. I discuss the realities of work from the perspective of a Black Woman and how I have successfully navigated work using my experiences. Toya Talks Podcast covers the world of work and not just the corporate world. Black Women for too long have been overlooked and underrepresented in the workplace. Toya Talks is a safe place and a platform to share, grow and learn, more importantly, educate ourselves and everyone else so we can navigate and grow in the world of work more smoothly. This Podcast contains my opinions and feelings based on my lived experiences, my opinions and my Black experience. My views and experiences are in no way intended to cause offence. Lets put the sensitivity to one side, prepare to laugh, learn & grow!!!!
The Toya Talks Podcast
The Corporations are showing their COLORS
Staring down the tangled web of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) in powerhouse corporations like Microsoft, McDonald's, Ford, and Meta, we make a bold claim: Corporate DEI initiatives often amount to little more than hollow gestures, failing to make meaningful change. We dissect the aftermath of George Floyd's murder, scrutinising how it prompted a wave of DEI pledges that often fall short of translating into actionable progress. Through personal narratives and candid analysis, we highlight the systemic barriers Black women encounter in predominantly white industries, arguing for the necessity of legal mandates and rigorous reporting to ensure DEI efforts are more than just lip service.
Navigating the multifaceted dynamics of DEI, we touch on compelling examples from popular culture, such as the casting of "Wicked," to explore representation and tokenism. The UK's paradox of relying on immigrant contributions while marginalising its diverse populace adds another layer to our discussion. We also delve into the world of content creation, sharing my journey with social media platforms like TikTok, where authentic engagement has been more rewarding than on traditional venues. These stories are woven with insights on personal agency, emphasising the limitations of corporate loyalty to DEI principles.
We tackle the ongoing saga of TikTok's legal challenges in the U.S., focusing on the interplay between freedom of expression and national security. The episode also bravely explores workplace racism and implicit bias, with personal experiences that shine a light on the discomfort and obstacles faced by Black women. Through accounts of employment tribunal battles and the art of self-advocacy, we emphasize resilience and strategic action against discrimination. Sharing the importance of escapism and safe spaces, we celebrate the strength and solidarity of Black Women, striving together to navigate professional challenges while maintaining our identity and dignity.
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Music (Intro and Outro) Written and created by Nomadic Star
What do Microsoft, mcdonald's, ford and Meta specifically Facebook have in common DEI? We're going to be speaking about DEI the lack thereof. Tiktok went dark for 12 hours and then made a return, a little bit like Donald Trump, who, coincidentally, at the point of recording this, is currently being inaugurated as the new president-elect of the USA. I'll be discussing an employment tribunal case which should be really interesting to everybody listening Benessi versus Maximus Services Limited and last week, a work colleague on a call full of a sea of white men. Okay, six white men proceeded to call me a madame and implied that I am a prostitute, I am a sex worker and I run a brothel. Let's get into it. You're locked into the Toya Talks podcast.
Speaker 2:Toya Talks, council estates, a corporate space, first gen Nigerian setting the pace From Goldman Sachs to PwC, building legacies for all to see. Dyslexia couldn't stop this flow. Law degree just watch me grow. Masters of the game, we show every sister how to own their throne. T-o-i-a. Let me show you how to navigate and elevate. That's what we do.
Speaker 1:Black queen, energy growing diversity, equity and inclusion is not a new topic. I think the only reason that it's being polarised is because there's big companies making big, grand announcements that imply that they Well, I say imply, it's not an imply they're basically telling us that diversity does not matter and it is not important, equity less so and inclusion even less so. Now we've got to remember, like, where this kind of company um announcements came from from. And it was off the back of um the murder of George Floyd. And literally I mean it's true, literally there was a revolution beginning, the remnants of a revolution, the rumbling of a revolution, where a lot of ethnic minorities, a lot of individuals who are from diverse backgrounds, but mainly from a racial perspective, were questioning how included we were in organisations and the experiences that we have experienced at the hands of employees and corporations. But, more so, we were looking for support from these organisations in the wake of the murder of George Floyd. So what happened was a lot of organisations made pledges. We had the whole resurgence of the black squares, allies became more informed about their allyship and organisations decided, in order to pacify us and in order to quench and quell the rumblings of a potential revolution, they would introduce DEI almost like a upgraded new concept, and they pledged money, new concepts. And they pledged money, dedicated teams and a commitment to deliver diversity, equity and inclusion across big companies. And what happened is it then trickled down to medium-sized companies, small companies, and DEI became the buzzword for, you know, inclusion. And it became the buzzword for companies demonstrating like, oh, no, no, no, like we recognise the plights of some of our employees, or a majority of our employees, and we're willing to work with, we want to be better. But if we just kind of like rewind a little bit, what is the opposite of diversity? It's uniformity. The opposite of equality is inequality and the opposite of inclusion is exclusion. So, with a lot of companies that are now saying, actually, you know what, we're disbanding our DEI teams and people are being made redundant who were employed to join DEI teams or we're scaling it back. When they say scaling it back, they're removing funding and the opportunity for them to be held accountable for the things that they pledged in introducing or, shall I say, reintroducing and creating a rebirth of diversity, equity and inclusion.
Speaker 1:Now the question that I have been asked is whether I believe DEI exists. And you have to excuse me, I've got really bad cold and I'm literally still recovering and the mic is so close to me you guys can literally hear the mucus on my chest, ok, but I think I don't believe DEI exists and it's taken me a while to get to this conclusion. But upon my own research, upon my personal experience and the organizations I've worked in since the resurgence and the rebirth of DEI, I think that it was just an opportunity to silence us. And I'm speaking directly to my black community here because I don't know the experience of others, that bay melting pot I'm not involved in, so I can only speak from the position of my own experience and the experience I have experienced as part of the black community and as a black woman. And whilst we still see organisations, or many organisations, where we see lack of representation from a senior perspective and I'm talking from directors right up to shareholders and board members where we see a lack of representation of black women in influential roles, I have to question whether DEI ever did anything. And the thing is, a lot of organisations pledged a lot of money towards this DEI and it's an initiative, let's really call it what it is. But who is doing the checks and balances? Who's holding these companies accountable? Are they reporting their DEI progress? Have they set objectives in which that we're measuring whether they have delivered against their promise to their employees and the wider community in which DEI affects is? We have been hoodwinked again into believing our voices and our experiences matter and as a black woman working in a white dominated industry and often being the only black woman in a room, I can tell you that DEI does not exist from the perspective of organizations. Organizations almost like evangelizing about what they are employing into this initiative.
Speaker 1:The reality is, if we really want to get to the root of DEI and really commit companies, there needs to be a legal mandate. It needs to be built into legislation. There needs to be legally required reporting that's published so that we can see the pay disparities between ethnic minority groups and um, say, for example, white people. Um, we need to be able to poll um employees um, anonymously like really anonymously about racial experiences in the workplace and what inclusion actually looks like in organisations, especially for us. When you're in the peripheral, for example, I don't work for Meta, so I don't know what inclusion and diversity and equity looks like in that organisation. The only way you're going to get a window or an opportunity to hear is if you hear from the people in which DEI is supposed to affect and uplift.
Speaker 1:And the reality is, during the pandemic we were confronted with and it was all over the world we were confronted with how racist our individual countries are, but how a black man can lose his life at the hands of officers who degraded and disregarded his humanity because of the colour of his skin and organisations were forced in because it was such a harrowing image and it was. You know, one thing about and I talk about the UK is the UK hides behind big words and grammar and English and the monarchy and whatever else they have going on here in the UK to remove themselves from responsibility of acknowledging the deplorable treatment of ethnic minorities and, in my case, black women and black people, and they feel as though, because they have, for example, a black leader of the Conservative Party, racism does not exist. We heard Rishi Sunak a few years ago refuse and point blankly said racism does not exist. He has never experienced racism and it took a direct experience, an unfortunate direct experience of racism for him to then acknowledge that he had been racially discriminated against on a massive level and then sought to canvas um sympathy and sought to canvas the emotions of people who he had disregarded their racial experiences, but we should acknowledge yours. That's not how this works.
Speaker 1:So when we talk about organizations disbanding DEI and or either removing DEI or scaling down, what we see is organisations doing what society does and it just disregards the plight, the struggle of diversity and what diversity means, especially in the UK, and removes equality by downgrading its importance and then diminishes the importance of inclusivity. So what they've done, and what many organisations have done, is they haven't even taken steps back. We have remained where we have always been. There's been no progress.
Speaker 1:So, rather than get annoyed about the lack of diversity, equity and inclusion, teams and sub teams and dedicated departments, I think what we really need to be doing is holding organisations accountable and saying, if you are saying that this is an inclusive organisation, that this is an inclusive organisation, you've got all these policies that you have had HR document or copy from other organisations. Let us hold you accountable. Let's quantify this. We need a report done within our, Because what they do is they'll have reports on it. You'll have, like they'll get companies like KPMG, deloitte or whoever they would get in to come and run certain things. I'll come and do an assessment of whether we're utilising the team skills, or come into our organisation and assess how we are delivering against our competitors. They're happy to find the money to do that. On the pay disparity between these diverse ethnic groups that you have in your organisations, that you're very proud to say that you have, and what's the pay disparity between black women and everyone else? Those are the reports. I want to know because I think then it's easier to hold their foot to the fire and it's easier to name and shame in that way.
Speaker 1:But what happens is when you put like everything under one diversity, equity, inclusion it sounds great. Dei it's you know the acronym that is, the buzzwords of anybody who feels that they fall into any one of those categories or falls into all of those categories. And I think what is happening now is what always happens where organisations use. What always happens where organizations use, abuse and dispose. And they use us for well. They use us for our emotions. They use us and weaponize our emotions against us. They dispose of us when they don't need us and they will hit whatever's the trending topic, and at that time it was about race relations and racial issues, and obviously I feel like DEI then started to take another direction when it was.
Speaker 1:Then it became focused on sexuality and the inclusion of diverse sexual descriptions, and you know how people were identifying. And then it was about pronouns, and then now it's about oh, we need to include everybody, but the point of the matter is we're not all included. There is a subsection of society that benefit from privilege, and so much so that they don't even see themselves as a part of DEI, because DEI was not created for them, does not affect them, and if you were to speak to and canvas, they will tell you Like there is a reason why you have fractions like the EDL. They exist for a reason. So, and I've said this before, dei is in direct conflict with what's actually happening on the ground. And until we get to a point where we're going to have that honest conversation, let's remove this whole. Racism does not exist. Let's remove the whole. Oh, you know, women and men, they're closing the gap on the pay disparity, because there is another subsection of that pay disparity and that's the black community, another subsection of that pay disparity, and that's the black community.
Speaker 1:Like if we're underrepresented, how can there be um equality in pay and equality in promotions and positions, how I don't get how they can work if you don't have inclusion as representative in your organization. It doesn't make sense to me. So I've just made a decision that I'm not going to allow myself to be triggered by acronyms that actually make no sense and acronyms that actually, on the face of it, what does it really deliver? And clearly it doesn't deliver anything of importance because it's so easily disposed of by organisations who were ready to pick up the mantle when it was um trending and will do away with it because there's no consequences. There is no reprimanding by parliamentary questions. There's no reprimanding by name and shame within um prime minister's uh uh questions question, uh, parliamentary question time. There's none of that. There's's none of you know, you don't? It's not like we have newspapers that embody DEI either. So you know, a lot of the papers, in the name of freedom of speech, are quite racist.
Speaker 1:We saw what happened to Meghan Markle and how they treated her, because unfortunately here and I say unfortunately for her, because she has always been white passing but the UK press went to town on her because she's part black and the way they looked at it is, as far as we're concerned, whilst the one drop rule is very much an American concept. It's still applied here in the UK. That's why she got the treatment and she continues to receive the treatment that she does. I mean, if we're going to talk about it, let's talk about it.
Speaker 1:Wicked, the film like box office smash, grammy nominated. Is it Grammy nominated? I think the musical is Grammy nominated and the lead actress is Cynthia Erivo, who actually is a Nigerian Igbo woman, who actually is a Nigerian Igbo woman. But the fact of the matter is the UK press were moving like Ariana Grande. Ariana Grande, I don't know again. Ariana Grande was the lead and she's white passing. She may not be white, but she's definitely white passing because even in the highest stages and even in a box office smash hit, they will always try to find somebody who is non-black to hold the mantle of what they believe excellence should be.
Speaker 1:But the reality is this the UK, the economy of the UK, is built up off the backs of immigrants. The economy of the UK is built up off the backs of immigrants. The UK is so ethnically diverse that there will come a stage where ethnic minorities you know I hate that statement will be in the majority in this country. Because, at the end of the day, if we were all to pack up and leave, the reality is and the children of were to pack up and leave, their economy would crumble. But we're living in a society that don't want to see us, but they want to take our taxes, they want to disrespect us, they want to give us DEI to pacify us like a dummy. Oh, you know what you guys? Stop talking about this topic. We'll throw money at it. Imaginary money, imaginary ethics and imaginary deliverables that never actually happen and true to form. They will pacify us and then disregard.
Speaker 1:And I think what it also shows is how unimportant DEI is to these organisations. So we're left now to use policies, legislation and the employment tribunal in that order literally. Um, because what? What other choice do we have? An organization will scream oh, we're diverse. We're diverse. Having one person of color and I even hate that having a black person or any other person of any ethnic group in a position doesn't make you diverse. It doesn't. What it makes you is potentially open, potentially, but it doesn't make you diverse.
Speaker 1:And I feel like it's up to us, as individuals, to seek out what we need from these organisations, navigate these organisations, get where we want and move on, and this is why I tell you they're not loyal to you. They're not loyal to your mental health. They're not loyal to DEI the same way they're not loyal to you. Are the architect of your career. You are in charge of your career destiny. Don't allow these organizations to use acronyms and buzzwords to trigger you. That's all I'm going to say. No matter, because when, the more I think about it, the more I get pissed off because I'm like they trying to insult our intelligence, like we don't know what's going on here.
Speaker 1:And then you've got the big companies. Now, um, and don't get me wrong, there's some companies that are like oh, you know, we believe in DEI. So Costco, for example, they said they believe in it, they're keeping it, but I'm not going to give you an award for that either. You know why are you coming out to tell us you're keeping it, oh, we're not like them. You know you want your accolades. What about givingolades to, um, the ethnic minorities and the diversity, equity and inclusion that you have committed to? How about damage? Like, rather than tell us, oh, we're keeping it, why don't you actually publish reports? Lead the charge, publish the reports, allow us to use you as a metric, of a comparator before and now, like, let's have that conversation.
Speaker 1:That, to me, is more productive and there's no point for me. I don't know. I'm just so disillusioned with the UK. I'm disillusioned in general, like you know, do we? You know, I just um. Look at how MPs treat black women, UK parliament how they treated um Dawn Butler and Diane Abbott. Look at that. And then you expect organisations to do better. I don't. So let's get down to TikTok Now. Let me just say something here.
Speaker 1:I started Toya Talks, really from Snapchat. I was on my way home from work or back from work and I would just talk about my day and everything, and my following grew exponentially on snapchat. And then I decided in 2017 that I would do a toy talks live. It sold out within 72 hours. Honestly, it was amazing and I've still got some of the footage from there. I was meant to do another one, um, but then the pandemic hit. I actually had sold tickets, everything, but I refunded everybody their money back and was like ah, until this one, uh, we figure this one out, um, and we know what happened in terms of like COVID and everything that went on for longer than any of us expected. And then, um, instagram.
Speaker 1:I've never really fallen in love with Instagram. I use it as a motor post mean. It's pretty simple to use. The algorithm is very biased and the algorithm is very loaded with favoritism and it's loaded with whatever Meta has decided is the objective of that day. But one thing I've really loved and really enjoyed is actually TikTok. Because of the algorithm it seems a lot more authentic and I love the fact that you don't have to be a certain aesthetic. You could potentially do really well on TikTok.
Speaker 1:A lot of people you know that's how they make money and honestly, I love how you could just go on there and just be yourself and you can create a following and I like the fact that people just go there and they express themselves and I trended. Well, I went viral during the pandemic and I've had various viral moments, but I have been on Instagram the longest, never had any of the little celebrations that I've had with TikTok, I've never had with Instagram. And I think one thing I'd had with TikTok I've never had with Instagram and I think one thing I'd say about TikTok as well is the ability to be able to make a revenue stream. Now the commerce side does need a bit of a development. But I appreciate that algorithm. I really do. I feel like I get to see what I'm interested in and I have also created like a mini following that is still growing and I definitely feel like I need to spend a little bit of time with TikTok. But can you believe that TikTok has amassed 150 million Americans on TikTok? It's huge and, to be fair, I just don't know how you could ever have a TikTok without the US. Like a lot of the dances, a lot of the cultural celebrations from the black community with the choreograph, yeah, like we need to talk the teens you understand. But I want to give a bit of a backstory because one thing I know is that a lot of people don't understand, kind of like what is happening in the background with TikTok. So I've summarised it for us all because, honey, I'm dyslexic and I don't want to read reams and pages from the Supreme Court. So what I have done is condensed it for you so effectively.
Speaker 1:On the 19th of January, tiktok went dark and the app store started to change and, effectively, what had happened is in 2024, congress passed a law and they said that TikTok had to sell their Chinese arm, which is ByteDance, to a non-Chinese country or a non-Chinese company. The US had national security concerns about the use of US data being handed over to the Chinese government and or them using TikTok to spread Chinese propaganda. Now, this literally was a fight between freedom of expression and the need to protect national security, and national security should always trump that. Uh, no pun intended. Uh, the supreme court um in on the 17th of january, upheld the ban and said right, you know, unless uh, uh, tick tock are willing to to sell their bite dance um of their organization to a US-based company, then it will no longer be operating in the US. Now we have to remember where this has come from, because it just happened overnight and, whilst I did cite Congress and things like that, this actually came about in 2020.
Speaker 1:So Donald Trump, effectively was the one that kind of was at the forefront of getting rid of TikTok and it cited you know that it should be. You know US companies should basically own TikTok. He also was concerned about national security and the fact that Beijing would use the data from TikTok, was concerned about national security and the fact that Beijing would use the data from TikTok and actually at the time, in 2020, he was actually overruled. Trump was overruled by a federal court. So, fast forward to the present day, the Supreme Court have upheld that there needs to be a ban on the 19th. And they also said listen, the only time we could delay this ban is if you're in talks to sell, right? So maybe you haven't concluded the sale, but you're in talks to sell, or you know you've already sold it, but either way, that branch can no longer be owned wholly by a Chinese entity, however, a conservative billionaire and he's a donor as well to the Republicans.
Speaker 1:His name is Jeff Yass. He actually owns 15% of ByteDance. Now, bytedance is the algorithm side of TikTok and he has a conversation with Donald Trump and Trump then changes his tune. He goes on air, he goes on TV and he called Facebook the enemy of the people, and he actually goes on to say that he doesn't want Facebook to benefit from a TikTok ban Because, the way he looks at it is, there's a ban on TikTok and no one's using TikTok. All those users then will flock to Facebook and because he does not like Facebook, for whatever reason, he then says, yeah, this whole ban is not going to really work. So then in 2024, last year, donald Trump then joins TikTok, yeah, and I think within 24 hours he has like 3 million followers or 3 million subscribers, and then they actually use TikTok as part of his presidential campaign. So there's a lot of like trending videos and there's a lot of his videos went viral, like there was one in particular where he takes a mick out of Kamala Harris for having Beyonce appear at one of her rallies, right, and that's kind of went viral. But the reality is Donald Trump, in my opinion, is a narcissist, so TikTok would work very well for him. So now he's trying to see the benefit of TikTok for himself, his public image, kind of like that revamping of his public image.
Speaker 1:So on the 19th of January that is, the eve of Donald Trump's inauguration TikTok goes dark. Okay, they get this pop-up that basically says it's no longer operating I'm paraphrasingasing no longer operating in the UK and in the US, and they will work with Donald Trump. So that was it. Even me, I felt a bit sad. Let me not like it, because I was like ah, like I have a lot of followers in the States, like who will be watching my stuff and also I watch a lot of um content creators from the states. So the US make, make, they do contribute to the success of TikTok. It doesn't matter how you cut it anyway, 12 hours later, tiktok returns and, um, there is a um kind of like a statement that's put out by the CEO of TikTok called Mr Shoe, and he basically says you know, thank you to Donald Trump. We're going to be working with with the Trump administration to kind of straighten this out and see how we can work together.
Speaker 1:But what is actually for sale? Because I don't actually know if there's been a 90-day stay. I don't know, because at the end of the day, the Supreme Court upheld the view that TikTok should be banned and then the exception is the extension of a 90-day period in order for a sale to happen. So I don't know if that 90-day has happened. I don't know. So I don't know if that 90 day has has happened. I don't know. It's not clear to me why. What legal legislation has been passed or what has been agreed that is in agreement with the legislation passed, that TikTok will return, do you understand? And within 12 hours? I don't really get that. It's not clear to me. But, either way, what is for sale?
Speaker 1:And the sale is obviously the Chinese arm, the bike dance, but it's actually the algorithm technology. That's what's for sale. That's where the data sits. I think what we have come to realise is how powerful data is. If you didn't know it before, you should definitely know it through this. I'm sure that when my daughter is old enough and she's in education as in like formal education, because she's in nursery now I'm sure they'll be using tiktok as a case study, and I can't wait to tell her what happened, because I lived it. Um, so yeah, so it's the algorithm. That's, it's the algorithm technology. That's where the concern is from, uh, from from congress and from the judges at the supreme court. But also it's not just as clear-cut just to sell or sell to a non-chinese entity or non-chinese company. It's all it's also about. The chinese government needs to permit the sale. They passed the legislation in china in 2020 with a list of technologies that cannot be exported without prior approval, and the algorithm technology which TikTok uses is one of those things that needs to be approved by the Chinese government. So you can see the multi-layered complexity here when it comes to TikTok. Now we also have to acknowledge that TikTok is worth over $100 billion.
Speaker 1:The CEO of TikTok has been invited and will be attending the inauguration of Donald Trump, as will the Vice President of China, and this whole thing that has happened, this whole rollercoaster of TikTok, social media emotions. It testifies of a few things that Trump wants to be the saviour. He wants to get the favouritism, the love from those people that use TikTok the younger voters, the voters who look at him with such scepticism, and also there's a narcissistic element where he wants to be held as the saviour and the beloved. But it's also about the currency of data and how important and how expensive and how sought after data is. The threat to national security is a real one. It can't be ignored and I doubt whether selling to a US company or US-based company actually mitigates that, because TikTok has been running for several years and I'd like to also understand in the last few years what has been demonstrated as a national security outside of the data element. There are discussions about selling 50% to a US-based company or requiring 50% of the business to be sold to pacify Congress and the Supreme Court, but I don't know what's going to happen. But what we are clear about is how frustrated the US and the China relationship is. It's a very frustrated, very fragile relationship.
Speaker 1:I think that Trump understands the magnitude and the importance of TikTok. He also understands how he could leverage this to further politicize a lot of the issues that he has with the China government and his need to be able to find balance. And on one hand, he's got the revolt of people who their bread and butter comes from TikTok and on the other hand, there is national security concerned. But underpinning that really is a lot of the layered political intentions when working with with china. So I think it's a case of let's see what happens. Um, even if they, if they're giving a night, if, even if tiktok are given a 90-day reprieve to enter conversations with a potential buyer, the reality is the chinese government still the china government, sorry still need to approve this. So I think that this will is is still a reoccurring story. It's still a very live story, but for now, tic-tac is back back like Trump.
Speaker 1:So last week I was in a meeting and it's a reoccurring meeting that happens every Thursday and um we have to speak about. I mean, you guys have worked in professional services, I'm sure, and for some of you that haven't or don't effectively you could be working on a range of different projects and you'll have a designated project team and you will give updates depending on where you're coming from. Are you finance? Are you quality assurance? Are you part of internal auditing? Are you commercial? Are you commercial contract management, like you all speak to, whether what, whatever hat that you have when you're in those meetings and um on my project, I'm the only black woman and, to be fair, I'm not always um, it's not, it's not at the forefront of, because I'm definitely treated with respect. I definitely have a voice at the table. I definitely, you know, feel involved and included, like I can never speak anything negative about that and, for all intents and purposes, the organisation is diverse but the team is diverse, diverse ethnically, I'd say, but not from um, there isn't racial diversity in that sense.
Speaker 1:Right, so this Thursday it was last week Thursday and I don't know if some of you follow me on Instagram you'll see that sometimes I have a pink light on. It's actually the toy talk sign. I have it laminated in pink. So when I'm on a call, um, I can put, because sometimes it gets dark in pink. So when I'm on a call, I can put, because sometimes it gets dark in my office so I can put the light on. So when I put the light on. Obviously they can't see the Toyotalks, but they just see the light, right. So it's not the first time, second time or third time I put the light on. It's been no issue, right. So I'd had the light on and when I joined the call there was in total, there were six people on the call.
Speaker 1:When I'd first joined the call there was two of us, no, three of us, three of us on the call and, uh, one of them and we're going to call him Robert. Robert says to me hi, madam. Robert says to me, hi, madam. And I mean I don't know how to take that and I'll tell you why. Last year he kept calling me bad cop, and I think I'd spoken about this in a previous episode. If I haven't, then I will reference it in this episode only to show a pattern of behavior. So, anyway, he had called me a madam and before I could really react, another colleague, the other colleague on the call, and we're going to call him Arnold. Arnold was like why are you calling Toya a madam? He literally said it just like that.
Speaker 1:And then Robert then proceeded to say oh, you've got a red light on. That's red light, toya, it's red light. You look like a red light to me. It, sorry, it looks like a red light to me. Um, madam, red light, that's what he said. So then I kind of like you know, like when you have a nervous laugh like it's nervous, like because at the point in which he said this, everybody's on the call. Now I'm talking about two directors, like really senior directors, um, and I'm now ever more conscious that I'm the only black woman in this room. So he then called me a madam, again on the call, and for about two minutes made a song and dance about my light being red, and he was like, oh, you know what red light means. And no one else was laughing on the score, everyone was silent, but he couldn't read the room.
Speaker 1:The director I think he could see that I was uncomfortable because he then moved rather than I mean to be fair to him I mean, I don't know why, I don't expect anything from white people to be fair but he moved on to the topics at hand. So we're going through the topics and I'm sitting there and I felt like I cannot believe this man has basically insinuated that I'm a prostitute. And I'm not just any prostitute, I am the madam and my light that is very clearly pink, is red. So effectively, my home is the red light district. He even said, when he said about the light being red, he actually said the words red light district. I have to say he said that because at that point as well, um, the guy, the Arnold, who had said, why are you calling Toya a madam?
Speaker 1:His mouth opened and I just kind of thought to myself Toya, this can go one of two ways. You can react and everybody will focus on your reaction, or you just buy time. And this is a situation where you buy time because no one in this room, apart from Arnold, no one else, has advocated for you, even though very clearly on their faces it's wrong and it's disrespectful and it's degrading what he said. And I want to be clear you can choose to be anything you want. Yeah, I respect everybody and I respect their choices. If you want to be a sex worker, that's up to you, but I'm not a sex worker. I'm a mother, I'm a career woman, I'm a very proud married black woman and even if my light was red, why do you think it's okay to tell me that? Basically, I operate a brothel in my home and you do it in front of a team of senior directors. I'm the only black woman in the room.
Speaker 1:Not only have you chose not to read the room, but you actually have no regard or respect for me as a woman, or as a black woman or just as a human being. You've called me out of my name. You've called me a madame. Now how else could it be taken that you would like the only madames I've ever read about? And I did my research. I spoke to ChatGPT because I wanted to understand, and madame is the one that basically organises the prostitutes. She is like the highest prostitute as well. She's been doing it for a long time, so she has recruits, so that's what he's calling me.
Speaker 1:So after the call, which lasted about 20 minutes, poker face, answer the questions, answer the questions Like you would think it didn't happen. Then I thought you know something, toya. You know how this is going to go. But what made me really frustrated and tired is that I have to deal with this. I actually am going to have to deal with this and I have to be real, like with you all, as I always am.
Speaker 1:The level of disrespect left a really nasty taste in my mouth and I felt like. Has he now set the tone for everybody else to disrespect me, bearing in mind I've had to work hard for these people's respect. Bear in mind I'm very comfortable with these people being the only black woman. I'm comfortable because I don't often think about it, because I'm just doing my job. But last week, thursday, was the first time I realised how my blackness um was very much a minority in that room and obviously it's off the back of this, of DEI. So already I'm thinking, wow, is this what's happened? Now? You kind of remove um. Bigger companies now are removing DEI, companies are unsure about their DEI position and because of the wave of controversy about DEI, then people have taken it upon their shoulders now to disrespect anyone that is considered diverse, requiring diversity and requiring inclusion. That's how I felt.
Speaker 1:So the next day. So I'd spoken to Kay about it, my husband, and he could not believe it. He said, toya, I promise you, if you was a black man, that could never happen, you know? And I said, I know. But then the, the, the. I said to him being a black woman is not for the faint-hearted, especially the working world. It isn't. And knowing that if I was a black man I'd be treated differently is also the reason that I'm sick to my stomach, because now you're taking advantage of the fact that I am a minority.
Speaker 1:So, um, I spoke to a colleague the next day and she is, um, what the white man would call um, racially diverse and she's not black. Though I spoke to her and she couldn't believe it when I told her she was like sorry, she made me repeat it and the reason I told her is number one. I know that she carries news, I do, but I had to take that risk because I needed somebody to be able to advocate for me as the first person I told after it happened. Because that person, she will now be considered a witness. Oh yeah, because I have to build a case now, because, as black people, we understand how we have to start building.
Speaker 1:I've told you about your burn folders. I'd already. You know I've skipped this, but I already made notes about what happened and everything you guys know. I tell you guys to keep, keep your notes. I had the burn folder. Everything was in there for me. That goes without saying, but I'm just going to say it for for any new listeners. And so when I spoke to her, she couldn't, she was flabbergasted and she and I asked her what her interpretation was and she basically regurgitated everything I had said to her.
Speaker 1:So I was left with two decisions. I can either wait until Thursday to confront him, because he will either repeat it or say something again, or I can have a conversation with him before Thursday and decide where I would go from there, because I could easily go to HR. That's easy street, but do I want the hassle of having to to go to HR before I've given him the opportunity to take accountability? So today I had that conversation with Robert and the conversation went a little bit like this. So I asked I sent him a team's message and I says um, we need to have a, a conversation. And he was like yeah, that's fine. So we had that at midday and then he said to me he says um, toya, no, he said. He said oh.
Speaker 1:So as he joined the call he was like oh, hi, hi, hi, madam, I'm not going to lie to you. Yeah, I just breathed heavily, you know like I thought the devil is not going to, the devil is not going to remove my crown today, because I know I'm being tempted to react and I'm not doing that. But inside of me. I was like this man has no idea the ramifications, the consequences of what he's saying. So then I said, robert, last week, thursday I don't necessarily think there was malicious intent, but what you said was malicious you degraded me, humiliated me and you called me a madam and then said that the light, which was very clearly pink, was red.
Speaker 1:And you effectively implied that I run a brothel and I'm a prostitute. And I'm not any prostitute, I'm the madam, because that's the name that you called me. And then you went on to say that the red light is a red light district and that red light district is currently operational in my home and therefore I'm a prostitute running a brothel. You didn't repeat it once, you repeated it two or three times. And I expected better from you because I had a lot of respect for you, not just as a person but as somebody I have been working with. I show you respect and I expect it back, but you didn't afford me that respect. You humiliated me and that was on my chest since Thursday. So the reason I'm speaking to you about this today is because it can't happen again. There should never be a situation where you would refer anyone or refer to anyone or reference anyone or insinuate that somebody is a sex worker. There should never be a point where you're comfortable enough to call somebody a prostitute and imply that they're running a brothel which is illegal in the UK, by the way, sex work is illegal. So you're also implying that I'm running an illegal operation In the middle of a meeting, in front of senior directors and our colleagues that we work with on a daily basis.
Speaker 1:I am a woman, I am a black woman, I am an ethnic minority, and the intersectionality of that requires you to have an understanding of the sensitivities and the cultural sensitivities of what you said and what you implied, and I can't accept that. So then he was like Toya, I would like to apologise. Now, when I'm talking, he's getting brighter and brighter and brighter red. So at the point in which he then decides he's going to apologise, he's very red. I actually thought he was going to pass out. I thought he was going to be dead on the call. I thought my man was going to die of asphyxiation because he was red.
Speaker 1:Tomatoes had nothing on this man. He was red. He was like. You know, I really respect you. Gaslight rubbish, bullshit because you don't talk to you. Don't say those things about people you respect.
Speaker 1:But then he was like you know it was said in jest, but I, you know, I can see that it was wrong and I and I apologize. And yeah, you know you are still one of my favorite people and I just hope that know, you're able to kind of move past this. I said to him I appreciate and accept the apology, but it just cannot happen again. I enjoy working with you, um, I enjoy a very healthy working relationship with you and other members of staff and I'm I'm very happy that I've had this conversation with you, because now I'm able to leave this feeling of disrespect and being degraded to rest and we can move on. But it just can't happen again. He was like understood, and then I started to talk about work stuff, work related stuff that he is involved in, that he's gonna have to do and I need and I da-da-da-da-da, just like that If I went to HR he'd get sacked. That's a fact, because I have so many witnesses there. It's a slam dunk case, you understand. I'll bring out the policy, I'll bring out a witness statement, even the lady that I told what happened. I'll bring it all out. But I'm tired of having to get to that point.
Speaker 1:I have an episode called Closet Racist, where I had to deal with somebody that was doing madness. There was a, and he put it all in writing, and that one was do you understand Like? I derive no joy of having to enforce my rights in that way, but what I am going to say to you is this I have learned from white people as well. I have learned that if I jump up and down and try to force through my opinions, it will be drowned out by their whiteness. I've also learned that I don't according to white people and the way they treat us, our tears are not substantial enough to be considered fragile. If I was a white woman, he would have never said that to me. Robert would have never, ever in his never, said that to me. Robert would have never, ever in his life said that to me. He said what he said because I am a black woman and it's very nuanced. He's not just a white man, he's from South Africa. So, number one, I think that I had more of an expectation because he's South African, but the fact that he is South African gives it another layer to what he had said to me.
Speaker 1:The disrespect was a lot. I have been called many things in my life. A prostitute is not one of them, a madam is not one of them. And running a brothel? I have never been accused of such, but this is the level of disrespect that we have to endure. Now I need you to understand something. He will do something similar again. I'm almost certain of it, Because when he joined the call not knowing what I was going to say to him, his first thing was to call me a madam, kind of asked you or brought it up. Why are you calling to her, madam? You didn't read the room. That tells me. Your inability to read the room is a choice. So the next time he decides to disrespect me, I will use this situation that happened last week as a demonstration of a pattern of behavior and be under no illusion. He's going to go back to all those colleagues on the call and tell them about the call. I know that for a fact, because he needs to rally the troops.
Speaker 1:A white man being vulnerable in front of a black woman and apologising. That's going to come with consequences and I'm ready for it. I'm ready for it. I have come too far in my life. In my career, I have had to work on and mend self-esteem, having been destroyed in the world of work several times, to get to where I am, and I understand how to use my voice and how to use their English and how to use their policies. I don't need to jump up and down, but what I am going to do is enforce my rights. I'm going to speak up for myself In the era of this whole DEI.
Speaker 1:This is like an example of DEI cannot for me. I don't believe that it even existed. Really, you can sit there and have people do mandatory training on diversity, equity, inclusion, but unless you are embodying that from the top down and making it the fabric of your organisation, you're going to get people like Robert calling black women prostitutes and calling them madams and calling them whatever else he calls them in the pub that he goes to, in that call with him. If you saw the look on his face, it was like somebody got a bucket of water and poured it on him. He never believed in his life. I don't know why he thought he could talk to me like that. I don't know, but I genuinely believe that he thinks that because I mind my business and I get on with it, that I'm easy game.
Speaker 1:I think he realised don't go there with me. I brought in the intersectionality, I brought in race. I brought in being an ethnic minority. I brought in everything, because that's the differences between him and I, and that's the reasons why he would never say what he said to me to a white woman or to a white man. So if he wants to go down that road with me, whilst we'll get to that road, he might not get to that road. Having passed, he will lose his job. I'll make sure of that, because there's never going to be a time ever that anyone makes me feel like I am less than, even less less so, a white man. I will meet you on the hill that you want to die on, and as black women, we have to understand how to navigate strategically. Now don't get it twisted. I don't think there would have been anything wrong with me going straight to HR, but I'm willing to play the game, and the game is to be seen as also being fair and balanced, and the game is to be seen as also being fair and balanced, and I'm willing to be patient enough to wait for a pattern, because the day that becomes a pattern, I promise you. He will tell everybody. Toya is taking me to HR. I'm about to lose my job. Don't play with me, motherfucker, because I am never the one, the two, the three, the four or the five. Don't go there.
Speaker 1:And anytime you are interacting with a black woman, if you cannot show her respect, don't speak to her. I genuinely believe that white people do not know how to behave in the presence of black people. I genuinely believe that. I genuinely believe our presence makes unnerves them. I think they're intimidated and I think they see black women as fair game in a way that they don't see black men, because black men have the proximity to their masculinity and they have that identifiable understanding with white men, and that disrespect is more than just how they refer to us. It's how they attempt to treat us.
Speaker 1:You have to find your voice. Now. I'm talking to you with somebody who minds my business. I get on, I deliver. I'm cool with everybody. He even said it. I get with everybody. I stay away from any negativity because that is me. That is me like there is something brewing on the project at the moment and as we were talking about some of the deliverables, he was like yeah, toya, you know, I know that you kind of like, stay away from all of that. That's me. That's me. I get to delivering and I get out. I don't have time for you know that, that, all that Fa, la, la, la la, I don't.
Speaker 1:But the reason I wanted to share this with you is number one, because I think it's important, like if something happens, to bring the reality here to the podcast, as I always do. But it's also about being strategic. Don't get it twisted. I could have gone mad on this guy, but I promise you all those white men would have focused on my reaction, because if they really had my back, they would have picked him up on it after the meeting or even during it, but they didn't. So I knew I was on my own. So then the scrutiny about how I handle it, and they could see I was uncomfortable. There was a point where I had this like nervous laugh. I never laugh like that. I was nervous laughing and I just wanted it to stop, and that was very clear and evident.
Speaker 1:Now, what he decides to do after this is completely up to him. But let me tell you something my fellow black women never allowed these people to make you feel like you can't use your voice. It's about how you use your voice to get what you want. And where I sit at the moment, I'm willing to play the waiting game, because the day he does this again, I believe in second chances. Of course I do. I just don't believe in third chances, and the second chance I'm giving him is don't do this again. Now, in a way, I kind of battled with the fact that maybe I should do this on the Thursday, but figured that if I did it on the Thursday, I don't, I can't control that that environment. Do you know what I mean? That that conversation whereas if he's a one-on-one I can control that, but I can depend on him to cascade that conversation to everyone else. Yeah, that one was heavy. I was fuming. I think I had smoke coming out my ears. Yeah, I was fucking fuming, but that's how I've handled it. Let's watch this space. So now I want to talk about an employment tribunal that happened between a young lady Her name is Banassi, mrs Banassi, that's her surname and her.
Speaker 1:Her employer, maximus Services Limited Now Banassi or Mrs Banassi started this role at the age of 18 and she basically made an application to the employment tribunal for ageism and victimization. She worked for the employmentment Advisor Division of Maximus Services Limited and she was one of the youngest in the team. Now there were scenarios that happened that made her feel micromanaged and targeted. And there was a situation that happened where she went for after work like a bowling event with her workplace and she asked one of her managers to keep her age confidential, but this manager told everybody anyway, completely disregarding her request. She, I say, a while later. A few things had happened in between, but a while later she made a grievance about her line manager and as a result, she had her line manager changed.
Speaker 1:Now the new manager let's call the new manager Robert he became very nitpicky. He would talk about her posture and even criticize what she had for breakfast, her posture, and even criticise what she had for breakfast. And you know, it kind of looked like it was kind of like a retaliation for, you know, raising a grievance against her former manager. So it's almost like they had an axe to grind, because these managers talk at the end of the day. But there was a situation that happened where she was reprimanded for wearing trainers into work. Now she couldn't understand why, because other staff members were wearing trainers too and they never were reprimanded or anything. So she believed that this was a double standard. She raised it in an email but nothing happened. Being reprimanded was upheld.
Speaker 1:There was even a situation where one of her colleagues had so Mrs Banassi had left her laptop on and maybe gone to the toilet or something, and a colleague, roberta, decided that she would use Mrs Banassi's laptop and even sent messages using her team's message to one of her work colleagues and she had made a complaint that why would Roberta do something like that? And I think it was also to do with the content that was exchanged. But they took Roberta's version of events without investigating Mrs Bernassi's complaint that her laptop was used without her permission. Soon after that happened, mrs Bernassi had a panic attack at work. She was emotionally and psychologically impacted by how she was treated and this is a prolonged time that this was happening. There was various scenarios. The ones that I've highlighted are just the ones that I think you know were important to draw your attention to, were important to draw your attention to. So, shortly after she had a panic attack, she was dismissed.
Speaker 1:It was later discovered by the Employment Tribunal that the HR had recommended that they extend Mrs Benassi's probation period in order to kind of like give her another chance. But the organisation went against this and instead chose to fire her. So she made an application to the Employment Tribunal for victimisation and ageism. So, as I previously mentioned, she lost on ageism, but the victimisation was upheld. The judge then put the onus on the employer to prove that the complaint had nothing. The previous complaints that Mrs Benassi had made had nothing to do with the dismissals. So, in other words, the judge wanted the employer to prove there was no causation between the complaint, which would then cause the dismissals, and that the dismissal was done independently based on the performance, was done independently based on the performance. Unfortunately, the employer was unable to prove that Ms Benassi was not dismissed because of the complaint and therefore, with the lack of proof, the judge decided to award costs and award in Mrs Benassi's favour for victimisation.
Speaker 1:I think it's also important to highlight in this case that, although quite high level, this is an 18-year-old girl. This is potentially her first job. Her experience is not great. She's bullied, she's victimised, she's targeted, she's humiliated, she's berated, she's measured to a different standard to all her other employees, all the other employees, all her co-workers. So, for example, with the trainers, everybody else is wearing their trainers, but you've decided to reprimand Mrs Benassi for the trainers. You then criticise her posture, how she eats her breakfast. That's crazy. How she eats her breakfast, that's crazy.
Speaker 1:I think, in the light of the previous topic about DEI, I think what this shows is, when we talk about inclusion for the purposes of this, it's about treating people equally and including them and not using age as a weapon against. And that's what's happened here. Although the lack of proof in the ageism, one could say, well, and this is what I thought I was like well, how could you not uphold the ageism when one could easily argue that, um, she was mis, she was disproportionately treated because of her age in comparison to everyone else, where the average age was was, um, uh, mid-20s and up. But the reality is you have to have undeniable proof to prove ageism. And it's one of those things where you know it's happening and one can believe it's happening, but where is the proof? And this is where we kind of go back to the whole burn folder, keeping a record of certain things that have happened. You know, you sometimes like a team's message. Like my colleague who I told what had happened, I sent her a team's message to let her know how it had affected me. Don't play with me, I will build my case before you know it. There's a whole motherfucking case. Don't try it with me, and I think you have to get into that mindset.
Speaker 1:Employment tribunal is not easy. This young lady, miss Manassi, was represented by her father, who did an amazing job, but it's still not easy to have to relive trauma, have to prove to your, to prove to people that this happened, um being made to feel like a liar or that you're exaggerating, being gaslit, being um taking the mick out of being ridiculed. It's not easy to go through a court system. So I would would always say you know, even if you want to take it to employment tribunal, yes, it should be considered the last resort, but make sure you've got your evidence, make sure you're able to prove certain things, make sure you take those screenshots. And I'm going to go on record to say this If you have to record conversations on your private mobile, then that's what needs to happen, because I think that we're in an era and in a stage now whereby I feel like people just blatantly lie, they'll just lie to get out of things and you you can't prove stuff, especially like you've been dismissed now you don't have access to your work files and things like that.
Speaker 1:You need to take recordings. Now legally they'll say, oh, you didn't get permission to record, but if it's about whether I'm a liar or not, I'm gonna fucking record because people need to know that you're the motherfucking liar and that your testimony cannot be trusted. And you need to then decide on the basis of that whether you want us to go to that employment tribunal. You're trying to settle me out of court and that's the level I'm at now burn folder, feedback folder, gather the evidence and whatever you want to do, I'm willing to do it.
Speaker 1:But what I am so proud about this young lady is she was able to find the strength to go to employment tribunal. But I do question the ramifications and the effects that this has on her long term. Um, does this set the tone for how she feels about employers and employment? How does this affect her next job, when maybe she doesn't have a great relationship with a manager? I hope that this doesn't stop her from advocating for herself and using her voice, but I think what it does do is demonstrate that employers may think that, oh, the burden of proof is at a higher standard, but you better believe that things like victimisation, things like that, the judge will ask you as an employer to be able to evidence certain things the fact that HR said, oh, extend the probation. You went against that and then you decided that you wanted to sack this young lady. You'll have to justify to the judge why you didn't take HR's direction.
Speaker 1:It was punitive. It was punishment for the fact that she had made a complaint and used her voice to advocate for herself, and I think it's important that we speak up. It's important that you advocate for yourself, it's important that you have your own back and I hope that I demonstrate that. There's been so many examples through the podcast where I've had certain difficult situations with managers, line managers, senior members of staff and directors, but it doesn't stop me from advocating for myself, because I'm not going to be uncomfortable so that you can rejoice in the power that you feel that you have to oppress me. It's not going to happen.
Speaker 1:I feel like when I think about oppression, I think of colonisation, and when a white man says to a black woman or implies something to a black woman, I take it on a deeper level. When you want to target an 18 year old. That's actually on a deeper level. The question is if she was a boy of 18, would do that. No, why her? Why tell people her age? Isn't that part of your GDPR anyway? Why are you telling people her age, for you know? So, yeah, I will put a link to that case. So if you could read that in your own time if you'd like to. But yeah, I just I don't know.
Speaker 1:I definitely feel quite heavy and I think that, as black women, organizations can be quite heavy. It's very difficult to always feel like you're having to have your own back. You have to be alert. The subtle jest, the subtle jokes that are laced in disrespect and it's, it's a lot. And you just think why? Why have you decided to start on me today? Why must I prove to you and assert myself to you in a way that you know you're not going to be able to recover from? It's crazy.
Speaker 1:Anyway, a bit of a serious episode this week. I don't know if you'll have an episode next week. I'm not too sure. I think I might want to take a one week break because it's been heavy, man, but anyway, I hope you've enjoyed this episode. Um, if you want to follow me. I have a website, toytalkscom. I'm also on all the social media platforms. If you type in Toya Washington. Um, I'm gonna be on TikTok, like reviewing like shows that I'm watching at the moment. I have to recommend Young, rich and African. Oh, I'm enjoying that show. I'm actually I think I'm gonna do a review on that show, tiktok.
Speaker 1:Molly May's Behind it All is very good as well, because when she was saying, what are you doing with your 24 hours a day, I needed to know what she was doing. And Behind it All shows us a bit more of the personable side. I still think she's quite stoic, but I found it really interesting. It was an watch I liked watching it. I have a lot of respect for molly may anyway, but I just don't like her flippant, off-handed comments. Um, she's enjoying privilege in a way that, uh, non-white women don't, especially black women. So when she asked what we're doing with our 24 hours, honey, we're just surviving, striving, and we staying live. Honey, we're trying to function without, without being torn down by white men and any other ethnic minority that deems us us as less than I need to also bring up nico slivin.
Speaker 1:Um, adenike adeleke, I love nico slivin, I love I do you know what I love? I love the fact that she is just a free spirit living her life. Her cousin is, if you don't know already, is David O, and the Adeleke family are in politics. Her father is the governor of Osush State and you know her uncle, who is David O's father, is a billionaire. I just love how Nico's living just lives her life unapologetically. It's escapism. So I definitely recommend, if you're not following Nico's living, just lives her life unapologetically. It's escapism. So I definitely recommend, if you're not following Nico's living, you need to follow her. A Nigerian babe, um, american born Nigerian babe living life and I love that for her. So I recommend that.
Speaker 1:Also, if you're not watching the Real Housewives of New York, I watch. Watch New York. I watch Potomac, salt Lake City, beverly Hills. I love New York because I feel like the Real Housewives of New York are more, a little bit more down to earth and I feel as though they're a bit more genuine, and then followed by Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
Speaker 1:Real Housewives of Beverly Hills are just rich women that don't know how to act. That's just it. The Real Housewives of Potly hills are just rich women that don't know how to act. That's just it. The real housewives of potomac are all a mess, even wendy wendy. I like you but you're a bit messy and I don't like the way what's her name, her friend k behaves. I don't like how she behaves in that show. Like I love the grandom, I love me some karen huger I do, because her green screens are 10 out of 10 and she will buck you where you buck her and I love that for her. Salt Lake City are just rich, rich women whose money don't make sense to me and I love to watch it. And yeah, those are what I'm watching.
Speaker 1:Real Housewives, not Real Housewives Married to Medicine Atlanta, oh, dr Heavenly. Anyway, I find Dr Heavenly funny. Funny, but she is offensive. But these are the shows that I enjoy watching. I like a little bit of ratchet tv. I do.
Speaker 1:I need escapism, not not in the workplace where somebody's trying to imply that I'm a prostitute. Honey, if I don't find escapism through reality shows, what exactly am I trying? Will I find escapism? Because there's only so much therapy I can pay for. Anyway, I hope you've learned something in this episode. I hope that I've been able to keep it real, although it's quite a serious topic.
Speaker 1:I think you can hear it in my voice quite been quite a heavy week and then coming on here and sharing, I'm having to relive some of that emotion and the reality is, yeah, you know, I know how to strategically navigate the world of work.
Speaker 1:I have seen the fruits of my labor. I'm a successful black woman. But it hasn't come without its load and the load is often really, really, really heavy and I've always said, in every lifetime, in any lifetime, I'd always come back as a black woman, specifically a black, nigerian, igbo woman every single time. But it's heavy and it's weighted and it's loaded and it's exhausting as well, and that can still be synonymous with being a beautiful black woman that takes pride in my history and somebody who understands the magic and the beauty of being who I am as a black woman. I can appreciate, appreciate that, but I can also see balance in that.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, anyway, you may or may not hear from me next week, but you'll probably hear from me the following week. But the reality of this episode is that we're here to care, share, create a safe space, to teach, guide and educate black women how to navigate the world of work safely and, in turn, highlight the path of our success, because success is asked for, the taken and we are not going to fall down on the traps that they, they set for us, the names that they call us, outside of our name, to set traps. The devil is busy, he is active and we are not going to be reactive, we're going to be strategic.
Speaker 2:My name is Toya Washington and you have been listening to the Toya Talks podcast. Energy grown. No fantasy, just real talk. From classroom dreams to boardroom walk. Black woman power watch it shine. Breaking barriers, redesigning time From Tottenham Roads to CEO, every step, teaching what we know, not just surviving but thriving more. Opening every closed door. Toyotox, toyotox, toyotox. Black queens to the top and we're still going.