Job Hugging: Because Hopping May Land You Nowhere

A hard truth set the tone for the new year: a fatal accident in Nigeria and the stark reminder that infrastructure and governance shape lives. I share why that grief paused my urge to create and how honesty, not forced optimism, can be the smartest way to start January. From there, we move straight into the UK job market, where rising employer costs, higher NI, and a punishing tax reality are shrinking vacancies and closing adverts early. Job hopping has stalled; job hugging is the new survival skill. And no, AI didn’t replace everyone misfired attempts exposed the gap between hype and capability, while smart teams now use AI to augment real work.

When growth outside slows, the inside strategy matters. I walk through how I anchor development to manager-owned objectives, build a feedback folder that proves outcomes, and keep a burn folder that captures patterns of harm. That combo turned a workplace bully into an unlikely conduit for opportunity: I secured sign-off, delivered for another team, and gained high-stakes exposure. He still doesn’t like me, but he respects me an equation that matters when you’re a Black Woman navigating power, perception, and limited tolerance for your tears. Respect lasts longer than likability; receipts speak when rooms turn cold.

We also zoom out to geopolitics shaping markets and risk: Nigeria’s insecurity, pressure across the Sahel, and the power play around Venezuela’s oil. These forces affect hiring cycles, investor sentiment, and the anxiety many of us feel about timing a move. So I’m easing into 2026 with deliberate pace, quarter by quarter goals, renewed focus on public speaking and subject expertise, and a commitment to consistency on TikTok, blending the world of work with practical fashion and “wear your wardrobe” thinking. If the market says hold, use the hold to sharpen your edge, negotiate the package that actually pays, and make your progress unavoidable.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Oh yeah, out of the space, off with face, put your night, we get put in the face. Um go to nuts, double speed, do they let the speeds for all the speeds? This let just couldn't stop this dog. Let's just stop the game which jokes every sister how to own their drop. Let me show you how to not forget the elevator while we do that queen energy grow.

Why I Paused Creating

UK Job Market On The Brink

Job Hugging Replaces Job Hopping

Pay, Tax, And Package Strategy

Be The Architect Of Your Career

Managing Gatekeepers And Burn Folders

The Bully, The Audit Trail, The Opportunity

Respect Over Likability

Power, Tears, And Workplace Dynamics

Resilience As Strategy

Public Speaking And Being The Only One

SPEAKER_01 0:29

Hello everyone, and welcome to the first episode of the Toy Talks podcast of 2026. Yeah. Listen, let's just, you know, before we get into it, let's just talk. Let's just talk, okay? So I thought I was gonna do like an end of year 2025 episode, and I had every intention to do one, and then I just kind of wasn't like I just didn't have this thing to do it. And I think it's partly because you know, the news of the accident happened with Anthony Joshua in Nigeria where he lost two of his friends, and that kind of like hit me a little bit, and I think it's the realization, and we get that daily, if not monthly, yearly, or even weekly, of how short life is, and it kind of really it made me really like think about Nigeria. And those of us who are Nigerians, I think you guys will understand. Um, I am an Ibo woman from Nigeria, I've gone to Nigeria many, many times. I grew up going almost every year, and then I was going as an adult by myself. I had friends that moved out there, so I spent a lot of time in Nigeria, and actually, before my father died, the intention is that I would move out there and pursue this African entertainment career that I'd forged for myself. And after Big Brother, that was the plan. But obviously, my father died and plans changed. But I think what was really kind of concerning and upsetting is how bad the infrastructure is in Nigeria to the point where someone can have an accident and people are losing their lives and there is no ambulance, where you're having people looting crime accident scenes, you're dealing with a lot of insecurity in Nigeria, and it kind of just really just put me in a bad mood. And I was like, I'm I can't produce an episode and feel this negative, it's not something that I do, and if I'm not feeling it, I just don't create. That's just how I am. Because for me, authenticity is key, and you'll hear it in my voice. I can't pretend a lot of you know, and so we closed up the year with that sad news, and I just was just reflecting, to be honest, really reflecting. My daughter is half Nigerian, and the reality is she probably won't be going to Nigeria for a few years because it's so in like the insecurity in Nigeria, especially the east of Nigeria where I'm from, you know, unless we're just going to Lagos, and you know, and that would be great, but I'm from the east of Nigeria, but my daughter potentially would never see get to go, especially well, not in the next few years, unless there's a complete overhaul in the Nigerian government, and we can see more infrastructure being built and less insecurity. Kidnappings are rife in the east as well, so there's too many um variables that are so negative and they are in counteracting each other. So, yeah, uh, I say all this to say the end of 2025 was really sad to hear that news and just to see the accident um from news outlets, and knowing that Nigeria doesn't have the basic things it needs for its people, but you've got a government that's thriving in oil and thriving in money, but that's not filtering through to the people, and that's a continuous long story, and it's it's actually a sad this one of the saddest stories that a country could be all rich but actually very, very poor. Um, and access and proximity to healthcare is not there for anyone, you could be as rich as you whoever, it's just not there, um, unless you have like private ambulance on tap and stuff, it's just crazy. Um so yeah, it's just a realization of how far behind Nigeria still is, and nobody wants to nobody wants to do anything about it. And I say no one, but even the government is just so covered. Nigeria is just it's a very disappointing, just disappointing. Anyway, so much has happened. I don't even know where to start. Like when I was like scoping this episode out, I was like, okay, where do I start? Because usually you know, like I introduce and then we go into like the the episode, but today I was like, actually, you know what, let me just start here. We we we we'll find we'll end up where we land. Um god, where should I start? I don't even know where to start. Let's talk about the job market. The job market is really bad in the UK, and when I say really bad, I will go out as far as saying that I think that we're gonna see a complete crash of the job market in 2026, and a lot of this is because of the rising costs of NI that has been um passed on to employers. I think the amount of tax that we pay as individuals, so effectively it's not as tax efficient or cost-effectively tax efficient to have a a job where you're earning over 100k. That's the truth of it. Because by the time you're taxed and taxed and taxed, you're probably taking home a year, the equivalent of what maybe. So if you're let's just take on 100k, you're probably taking home about 80,000 a year because it's that 20k is probably paid in taxes for the year, and I'm being conservative, it's probably slightly less than 80k. Um, you are having um employers who are not actually advertising for vacancies, and the vacancies that you see are few and far between. So for one vacancy, you could have 10 applicants um applying, and I'm just quite in averages here, um, and that was the middle of last year. So now for every one role, you're probably having 50 applicants. Um, and by the time you've finished a campaign for a role, you've probably got what maybe over a thousand applicants, and you're shortlisting from there. It's just crazy. So you're finding a lot of jobs, they are bringing forward the closing of their job adverts pretty soon. So on average, two weeks. It's been a week, you know. Um, I think also as well, just to speak more about the job market and kind of where we see it going. I am going to be tracking it and feeding back on the podcast because I think it's important. But what we're seeing is a rise in unemployment and the drop in vacancies, um, the rise in cost of the workforce. Employers um are not recruiting in the numbers they were previously over the last few years. Employees are feeling trapped as well because there is a concept I want to introduce you to, and it's called job hugging. And it's where employees feel trapped in their current roles. Um, they're struggling in their current roles to be promoted or to get um pay rises or to find better external roles. So, what they do is they hold on to the roles that they have, um, and they job effectively job hug. Um, some people blame the unemployment crisis on the adoption of AI, but AI are not replacing people. The attempts earlier in the year, last year, um 2025, um, of using AI to replace people hit a block because the likes of Deloitte had mass um redundancies, and the view was that Deloitte would replace a lot of their roles with AI, but the reality is AI is not at a point where it can replace humans, so they've now had to like rehire or get the people back who they got rid of, and it's become a mess. I think the adoption of AI has I think um made roles and jobs easier if it's used in the right way. I think um AI adoption cannot be blamed for unemployment because unemployment has been rising steadily since COVID. Um, but what we're seeing now is like a complete obliteration of job hopping. So the job hopping is effectively that it's being able to drop from one job job to another, the average person staying in a role maybe two years before they then, you know, go to different roles, they pivot, they job hopp. Now those those roles are not really there. So hopping, you're not hopping to anything effectively, you're hopping to unemployment. So people are holding on to the jobs they have and making good of very difficult um employment situations that they're in. I definitely um found myself asking myself some really kind of confronting career questions in terms of my own development, and I'm gonna be very, very honest with you. Um, there's been some developments in terms of what I expect versus what's actually happened at work, which has been quite positive. Um, but the reality is when I looked on the job market, it was scarce. And this is me going through my Rolodex and having conversations with recruiters. Um, and there were opportunities that came my way, but not in the numbers that I'm used to seeing, where I have the option of and therefore am going through rounds of interviews. I I didn't really have that experience. I spoke to a few people, had a couple of conversations, but not in the numbers I'm used to having. And upon kind of reviewing the job market, having conversations, and really speaking to people from different sectors, it's very clear to me that the roles are not there in the numbers we're used to seeing, if at all. They're not paying as well. And, you know, this this whole tax system here in the UK I've spoken about extensively, has meant that there's a cap. Um, 85k is probably the cap whereby you pay a higher rate of tax but still take a reasonable amount of money home. When you're earning six figures 100k and over, it's not as cost-effective. It isn't, because when you factor in tax, unless you're getting good benefits, and that's one thing I'm I'm I'm gonna say. When I call I I hate the word benefits because I don't think pensions are classed as benefits. I don't think that um car allowance or bike allowances are benefits, I think they're part and parcel of a role, because how you get to a role is really important to be able to do and deliver the role. But I say all this to say package is really, really important. I've spoken about this before earlier on in the podcast, and I've spoken about really navigating your package. Now, just because the job market seems to be crashing, and just because there's a rising rate of unemployment doesn't mean that when you're you have opportunities to negotiate, that you don't um approach those opportunities. Because I think what tends to happen is people are job hugging to a point where they're too afraid to have uncomfortable conversations in case they find themselves um without a job to hug. And I just don't think that that should be the approach. I think if you don't ask, you don't get you should be open to having conversations about progress anyway. And in order for you to understand the lay of the land, you need to have those conversations. Um, I definitely have spoken to people who are used to quite hefty bonuses and maybe not seeing the same, if at all, any bonuses. And I think it's it's really uncomfortable time. And Rachel Reeves's budget announcement, autumn budget announcement, kind of really made it clear that the economy is on a downward spiral. Uh, I don't even think it's breaking even. Um, one can say, oh, they inherited it from the previous government, but every government has inherited a bad economy. I don't think any government have said, oh, the economy is really good. I I don't I can't remember it anyway. Um but the reason I speak about this is more so just to bring to light what's happening in the job market, um, and it's very general. Um, I'm not saying every single sector, but I'm saying most sectors. And I I'm saying keep your ear to the ground and your eyes peeled because I think the the job sector is is and unemployment will continue to rise. I think we're gonna see an employment crash um over the next 12 months. And I think that this is gonna be the year, or at least the first two quarters, is gonna be about job hugging, where you literally hold on to your job, you try and see if you can navigate internally, you make best out of your current role, do the extended learning, do whatever it is that you need to skill up in your role whilst you're in your role until the job market gets better, but it's going to get a lot worse. Now, with this being said, I think it's really important that I talk about um, you know, I talk about all the time about you being a brand, advocating for yourself, opportunities, conversations, objective setting, milestones, um, kind of your feedback folder, your burn folder, but for this part of the episode, your feedback folder. So I it was really clear to me that opportunities haven't been given to me in the same way as other colleagues. But I always live by the mantra, you are the architect of your career. But your bosses, your line managers, are the gatekeepers. You can't run away from that because before opportunities can reach you, they have to pass them. Um, and in many situations, you almost have to get sign off from line management to be able to accept other opportunities that are over and above your current day-to-day. And I found myself in that situation. So, inasmuch as there have been opportunities um, you know, for others, that it always felt like there was a lack of opportunities for myself. And you know, I don't deal with stagnation very well, I don't deal with not being able to develop as a career woman. But my current situation isn't bad, and I need to like make sure I make that clear, it really isn't bad. But what isn't great is not being able to grow within my role or not being able to grow because I always believe and I've always believed that redundancy is round the corner for everyone. Don't ever get comfortable. It takes one decision from the top for you to find yourself in a redundancy situation. So your role is yes, to be the architect of your career to keep on skilling up and ensure that stagnation doesn't hit you. And if it does, it's only for a short time and then you're you're you're moving, you know. And something that I've always said is in as much as you're the architect of your career, you're a brand, and how you deliver your role and how you interact with your colleagues, how you manage yourself is part of your brand. That's why I don't take these cheap jokes, I don't deal with any of that shit. You know how it is on the podcast. I say it to you straight. Because there are many, many conversations that happen that you're not in the room for. So you need to make sure that you the way you hold yourself out are directing those conversations in a way that benefit you. So that's why I cut the shit really quickly. Some of you would turn around and say, I'm harsh, I'm this, I'm that. But the reality is as a black woman, as a neurodivergent uh neurodivergent black woman, and often being the only black woman in a room or the only person of colour in a room, I am never gonna allow somebody to cheapen my brand by trying to cheapen me through cheap jokes, or trying to make me the laughing stock of, or trying to reduce what I do to nothing. It's never gonna happen. And I don't actually care who the person is, I will never allow anybody to um crush or try to step on my self-esteem, try to erase what I have done and what I've delivered, or try to demean me um privately or publicly. I'm never gonna have it. That being said, um I have anchored my development on my boss in my um objective settings. I've made it really clear that it's a joint effort because that is the only way I can anchor that in anchoring it, it's the only way that I can get accountability, not just from myself, but from the gatekeepers. And for many of us, those gatekeepers are our line managers. And um basically, you guys remember I was speaking about the workplace bully and understanding how to navigate him has been really interesting because the burn folder has been burning honey, but so has my ability to continue to um deliver my role and strategically align myself with people that I know that not only appreciate what I do but are senior enough to have influence. So I can't remember, but I think I tell spoken to you guys about the Christmas party, the Christmas dinner that I went to. And you know, everyone yeah, I think I I remember doing that. And off the back of that, I'd say maybe three weeks before Christmas, um, the Whiteplace bully had reached out to me. He's quite a senior by the way, and he had reached out to me about something and then had asked me a question about how to do something um commercially, in which I gave him the advice and he didn't reply, didn't say a word. So I don't know if the message went through, I don't know nothing. And this is part of kind of how he operates. So you don't know if it's a test, you don't know what it is. But for me, I don't give a shit if it's a test. Life is a fucking test. So when I'm answering, answering questions about how to do something commercially, whatever, I'm always gonna do my best in answering those questions. But more importantly, whether you choose to take the advice, that's up to you. I've got an audit, I've gave given it to you. What you choose to do with it is up to you. And I think I I learned very early on in my career that you can't force people to listen to you. They're either gonna do it or not. But one thing you you can sure bet on is if they are confronted with an opportunity to sell you down the river, they will always. So it's better that you have your back. You understand? You keep them audits, you take them screenshots of those instantaneous communications, and you really have your own back. And um, maybe a few hours after giving that advice, I was somebody else from a different division reached out to me and said, Listen, I know that you are this is your role on working on this particular project. Our project is on of the same scale, but slightly different. And I was wondering if you could give us some advice on what to do. So I sent a message to my boss because he had been helping them out. So I don't know kind of what had gone on. And my boss was on leave, and I said, Listen, this is what I've been asked for this particular other project. I have capacity, I'm more than willing to help. Um, I gave advice to Workplace Bully about it, and now they've come back to me because he's gone to them and said, Listen, there's Toya, she's working on this huge account. Um, I think you guys need to speak to her because you need her advice. And my boss was like, Yeah, if you've got capacity, sure. So I was like, okay, cool. Because it puts my boss in a good position, right? Because he was on leave anyway. So it's not like he could step in. I'm willing, capable, able. And I began working with this other team. Long story short, I have been given the opportunity to advise and provide commercial and commercial contract support for a very big project, in addition to the project I already have. So when I'm talking about development, this is what I mean. This is what I mean. It's the ability to kind of use my other skills. And I want a portfolio of of high accounts that I've worked on, um, providing the advice and the capacity that I have. And I'm in, sorry. So what's really been interesting is that came from workplace bully. And this is why I say to you, he doesn't like me, but he respects me. And I would choose respect over likability over and over again. You don't have to like me. I think liking somebody is very subjective, but respecting what I do means that even if you don't want to listen, you know you don't have a choice because I am the subject matter expert in what I do. So he's now gone to this other team and said, Toya is she's she's she is the person we are in a lot of shit, and the only way we're gonna get out of it or at least navigate it safely is working with Toya to do it. And what I learned from that is this. You see, one thing with me, and and something that I I really like, I I don't go to war with people, I'm not that person. If you decide to go to war with me, it will always be unprovoked. And if you come for me and I did not send for you, I'm coming for you, and I'm gonna come for you in such a way that you will not recover from it. So better not start with me at all. That's how I operate. I will give you um space to really think about whether you want to do this, but there is a line, and once that line is crossed, I'm relentless, and that is the truth. I stand by it. My career, um, my career um has spanned 15 years, and it's 15 years of navigating treacherous waters, it's it's 15 years of pain, upset, tears, headache, um loneliness, career loneliness, and creating my own directions, knowing that doors may or may not be open for me, but if I put you in a situation where you haven't got a choice because I'm so good at what I do, you will have to open that door. That can be very exhausting. But what I learned from this situation is this bully guy survives in the workplace because he really understands that his success in any organization, in any team, is based on the people that he has working for him. He's not dumb, he's highly intelligent. The issue that he has is any success he could potentially get, he stands in the way of because he doesn't have people that will support his success. Because the project's in a mess, by the way. And um he we had he had hoped that it would progress and it was rejected. The project was rejected and said, You you go back to the drawing board, and it was very targeted towards him, and it made me realize that however I see him as the workplace bully and many others see him the same way, that he's also suffering from that lack of introspection that's actually hampering his ability to progress. Um, he realizes far too late. So I don't actually think he's gonna be on either project um by the end of 2026. I don't see it. I think that he's gonna receive like a list of complaints about him. Um in December, I had a random conversation with a colleague, and I was helping her with something as part of a project I was working on, and she was like, Toy, I've worked with you before, so I know you'll be able to help. Da da helped her out, and she goes, Oh Toy, I'm so happy that you've been able to help me with this because workplace bully, um, I was in tears. And I was like, What? She was like, Yeah, he made me cry, I was in tears, and I think he realised he'd crossed the line with me, he called me back and basically said that his intention wasn't to make me cry. And I was like, you know, this is this is the privilege that I feel like white women have that black women will never have. Her tears will evoke a reaction of empathy. Whereas black women, I think we've learned that there is no currency to our tears. Because with the treatment that I've received, if I was to cry, uh there would be no currency. You have to cry with anger as a black woman, and that cry with anger will then motivate you, the anger will motivate you to use the policies to be able to teach said person a lesson. That is a lot of energy that you would have to use. Whereas tears alone is enough to invoke a reaction and possibly introspection from somebody to not do that again. And whilst they may not do the exact same thing and may do similar, that accountability that they done something wrong came from the power of a white woman's tears. That's fucking crazy. When she told me, I just I'm I'm the person that people tell stuff to, and I've all I'm I'm like that in outside of work, and I'm a fortress, I won't share, right? And at work, I I think I've become that person because I don't get involved in the work politics, I I don't gossip, I'm not into he said, she said, if I want to know something, I'll go straight to the source. I'm I'm very fearless in that way. Um, but I've also become the person that people feel very comfortable to share their vulnerabilities with. And for me, I see as an opportunity to learn more about said person, but also the environment that I'm working in. Because now she's shared that with me. I also now know she's not the only one that's been reduced to tears. Um, but she won't report him or anything because the the power of her tears has given her an opportunity to also exit the project and work on something else where she's away from him. And it's been done so smoothly, you just think, oh, she's just progressing. You won't actually realise that it's the weight of this negative workplace bully that's allowed her to orchestrate a move outside of the team and it just looks like progress. That's crazy, and that is powerful. Now, I know I have a lot of women who are um not black but are of different races, different backgrounds, different cultures, and I welcome all listeners. And if you are offended by certain things I've said, but I think you need to check your insecurities. You cannot, in good faith, sit in front of me and tell me there's no currency in a white woman's tears. That's very disingenuous for you to say. Because the power of a white woman's tears could do you out of a job. I've witnessed it, I've seen it. But to watch, to see and hear and watch this white woman share with me how her tears basically allowed her to pivot into progress is crazy. Whereas I'm sitting here trying to strategize how to navigate this workplace bully. Yeah, mad that is. But at the same time, what I wanted and what I said to the universe about how I wanted my progress to look, has happened. It just hasn't happened through the means in which I thought it would. And I think it testifies of me as a person, my resilience, and I feel like women, especially women of colour, resilience has to be part of our toolbox. It's it's a sad state of affairs that I even say that. And what does resilience mean? Is resilience being able to continue even though you're down and been kicked to the ground? Is that resilience? And I think no, I think resilience is your ability to be able to straty to navigate. That's resilience. Um, understanding the lay of the land and confronting harsh truths about how, as women of colour, we don't have the advantages that say our white counterparts do. There's a level of resilience in just confronting that realization and accepting it and knowing that it's not going to change. So, what needs to change is how we as women of colour navigate. And this is why the podcast exists because I would never talk about something that I've not had the experience in or have proximity to the experience. And I keep saying to you, your reputation is so important. And when I talk about reputation, I'm not talking about inaction as part of your reputation, I'm talking about how you act. So I'm talking about not taking shit and being able to advocate for yourself in difficult situations. There are so many situations last year where I was the only person that had my school of thought and being able to um be the odd one out of a collective that thinks in a certain way and say, I don't agree with you guys. Um, this is my position, this is what I think. If this is what you guys think and you overrule me, that's fine. But I want it on the record that this is my position. And I think I've I've come to accept the level of confidence it takes to be like that. Because as a woman, as a black woman, I don't see it as oh, this makes me confident. It's just it's a part or parcel of our existence that we're used to being one of, the only. But I feel like there's a difference between being that way and being silenced because you're the one, only one, versus being the only one and standing on it and being confident enough to say, listen, this is my view, and it's different to everybody else's. And I think I've kind of mastered the ability to be comfortable in those income uncomfortable situations, and I definitely think a lot of that comes from fearlessness. Like, what's the worst? That's sometimes how I operate. Like, what's the worst? I don't, I'm not, I don't, I'm not sheep, I just have never been that person, and I don't think you have to be extroverted or any type of personality type. I think you just have to be okay with being uncomfortable, and I think that is said, that is true in the world of work. You have to be okay with being uncomfortable, and a lot of that comes from self-confidence, believing in yourself enough to know that okay, I believe in me, and I'm not trying to convince other people to believe in me. I'm trying to operate in my authenticity, and part of that is I don't agree with this, I could be wrong. This is my position, this is why I think it this is my logic. I can put pen to paper. Um, I'm not necessarily willing to die on the hill, but I'm willing to go to the hill and say this is what I believe in, and that is a lot of situations. I found myself at work last year, and it's quite lonely. I can't lie, it is lonely, especially when you know that you've come off a call and other people are reconvened to possibly talk about you and your non-agreement. I think sometimes in the workplace, you just get to a point where you realise that your ability to deliver your job to the best of your ability is to do it, even when it means that you don't have um a lot of people who agree with you, or you are not necessarily like part of the pack. And yeah, and and and I think being able to justify your position that is different to everyone else is really important in a logical way. So when I talk about being a subject matter expert, it takes time. But if that is your aim, then I feel like you place yourself in a position whereby you really are a thought, uh kind of think you really are a thinker, you really know how to think outside of the of the box, but recognise that you can be wrong too, um, considering other schools of thought, but even if other schools of thought doesn't change your position, you're able to say that, you know. Um, and I think a lot of that comes from public speaking. I don't I think public speaking is really important, and I'm realising it more and more becoming a mum, like being able to speak publicly in front of people who are senior or have more influence than you, and knowing that your voice could have influence no matter the percentage of influence it has. Uh so yeah. Sorry if I'm going on a tangent there, I don't think I have done, but I just want to share that with you because I talk about you know these key things being a subject matter expert, you know, being all these things. And it's important that I give you examples where your brand is being tested or you are being tested. And you know, as a as a woman, I always say like our our existence in the workplace is is layered. Men, I doubt very much that men go through a lot of what us as women go through because men are given um opportunities, rights, and understanding is a given. Whereas I feel like as a woman it's different for us than if you have the intersectionality of gender and race, you can imagine how much more difficult it is for us. But I'm hoping that um this year gives us more strategy, more understanding, and more clarity. I think that's really important. Clarity. Um, and this is why I say, you know, with the burn folder, you build it, it's not something you just shoot from the hip. You need to understand what's going on here. This workplace bully has effectively given me an opportunity that I've asked my own boss for and haven't received. Does it mean that he's less of a bully? No, I think it means that sometimes when you are when you confront people with what the best looks like, or at least what great looks like, sometimes they haven't got any choice, any choice but to accept. That's what I think. And I'm I'm not saying I'm the best in the world, I'm bloody good at what I do, and I feel like I have the confidence enough to say that. I own up to my mistakes, I recognize I'm, you know, I don't know it all, and I come with that level of authenticity. Me, I'm trying my best. I say to my daughter, you try your best, your best is always good enough. And literally, my daughter uses that mantra throughout everything, through potty training, through trying different things at nursery, at home. I say, try your best, your best is always good enough. And she always finishes the sentence in that way. Positive affirmations. We have to, as women, positively affirm ourselves, by the way. Constantly. We have to do that. Um, so let's shift gears slightly. So at the tail end of last year, um, America confirmed that, in allegedly, in conjunction with Nigerian government, that they actually bombed the north of Nigeria. Now, their reasons are that they want to liberate Christians there who they allege are dying in large numbers because of their religion, in which the north is mainly um dominated by Muslims in the north. My mum was actually born in the north of Nigeria. Fun fact. Um, but basically, it's in retaliation of the deaths of um Christians in the north. Now, when I first heard about the bombings in Nigeria, I was shocked. And I am gonna keep it brief because it kind of leads into another segue. But first of all, my condolences because what's been happening in the north didn't start yesterday, it's been ongoing for many, many years, but it's very layered and it's intertwined with the government. Those of us who understand Nigerian history understand what's going on in the north, okay? And it was really strange that suddenly Trump cares about Christianity, he doesn't act in a very Christian manner, but that the Christians in Nigeria, it's very weird. Now, Nigeria has a lot of oil, and to keep it simple, Nigeria are quote unquote in bed with America. Now, whenever America doesn't get its way, suddenly the threats and now the bombs. Um, it's also an opportunity, I think, to further add to the destabilization of the north of Nigeria so that it provides an opportunity for um the US and other countries like France to infiltrate certain countries that are close to Nigeria. And I'm talking about Mali, Burkina Faso. Now, if you've been following a lot of what I've shared about kind of the Sahel alliance, Burkina Faso's liberation um from the control of the West and joining forces with Mali and the want to remove the strength of the dollar in Africa, then you'll understand that this is all a smoke screen, and the real um objective is to infiltrate some of the other countries I've mentioned. The US does not like the change in position of a lot of African countries and the move towards a more united Africa front, they don't like it. Now, that being said, what has dominated the press at the moment is the kidnapping of Nicolas Maduro and his wife, who is the president of Venezuela. And I shared a few things on social media about it, and there are some developed minds and there are some very underdeveloped minds, and it's really clear who is committed to constantly scrolling social media without actually giving themselves an opportunity to read for understanding, for knowledge, and for comprehension. It's really scary access to information that we all have, but the limited minds that um are all that that are are in and amongst us in understanding um politics and understanding the history of why things are things are there's nothing that's happening that's new, by the way. It's just that it's happening, and how it's happening is probably a bit more confronting. And um with what's happening in Venezuela, it didn't just start yesterday. Months before, um, there was a lot of oil tankers that had been targeted by the US, um, whether they have oil in those tanks or not, uh, the main source of income for Venezuela is their oil. So, in seizing um a lot of the oil tankers, the US were aiming to squeeze the the Venezuelan economy in a way to push out the president of Venezuela. Now, is this just about oil? No, I think the main reason is oil, but it's the type of oil that um Venezuela has uh that America does not have enough of. And it is also about control and increasing the US oil reserve because what the US are saying as well, it's not enough for them to just seize control of Venezuela and um effectively kidnap the president and and his wife. It's also about having big oil businesses going there and as according to Trump, kind of rectify, build, renew the the oil infrastructure in Venezuela so that Venezuela can continue to make money and obviously the US make money and control the oil and where it goes. I don't want to bore anyone um about kind of what's happened and what Venezuela did to one of the Caribbean countries and stopped. Stopping the oil flow and all of this. There's a lot of stuff that's happened. Now, the people of Venezuela, when they've interviewed certain people, you've got to be careful about the outlets that are sharing with us. Oh, the Venezuelan people are so happy. I think every country has its problems. I I definitely think that the people of Venezuela are not necessarily happy with the leadership of the country. But I I think what we can't ignore here is Trump went into another country where there is a sitting president. Not a de facto, not an acting, an elected sitting president, kidnapped him at the dead of night and his wife, put them on a US warship back to I say back, US warship to the US, New York, and now has assumed the management, if you like, of Venezuela, a country. That is crazy. It's not like we haven't seen it happen before, but that was many, many, many years ago, long before us. Long before our parents. But it's the fact that it's ignored um international law. Um it was not constitutionally approved. There's no one in the US constitution, like constitutionally said Congress that approved this, by the way. This is what I'm saying is scary. It's no due process was followed. Trump got advice, he believes certain things, and he acts. And that makes for a very, very, very scary president because there are no rules, and where there's no rule and there's no rule of law, then it means as he gets to do what he wants, and that is a problem because you're giving unfettered power to a crazy man. I I think that psych evaluations need to be mandatory for any president across the world. I think they need to be done yearly. I do because you need to make sure the power hasn't gone to their heads. Bear in mind the people that would benefit from the regime that Trump is advocating for and pursuing is the rich. How do you think they're gonna get paid for that? And what is America's cut? This is what these are the qu these are the probing questions. That's why I say comprehension is important. You know, like when we were like studying, mandatory studying at school, so read between the lines, comprehension. This is the application of that. Sorry, my social media timeline is a problem. Um I think um a lot of leaders need to pay attention because whilst this was happening, there was an attempted coup in Bukina Faso. And a lot of these coups, a lot of these things that happen, these uprisings, there's usually a treacherous soul within. So, in the case of the Venezuelan president, um basically they had double agents on ground that basically sold him out. And it's the same for what has what was attempted in Book of Nefaso. And apparently the people stood up and rose for um His Excellency Ibrahim Troy. And um before the coup could even take place, they kind of overthrew it, you know. They they but this is gonna continue to happen, and we need to pay attention because this is the pursuit of natural resources in whatever capacity it it it it uh it shows itself as oil, um, uranium, and I think it's really important that we recognize that Trump is sending out a warning sign to other leaders, especially in Africa, of what he can do, what he's capable of, and what he's willing to do. Because his end goal is always to make America great again, but he wants to make himself the greatest. This is also about Trump's legacy. You know what? There's so much more I wanted to discuss on the podcast, like Charlemagne the God, who secured a five-year$200 million deal with iHeartMedia. But I feel like we could talk about that in the next episode. Also, as well, I want to talk about Eddie and Wendy Assappho. I've spoken about them before from the Royal Housewives of Potomac, Zara's physical state stores. Um, they've reduced their stores by 600 stores since 2019. I want to kind of get into that conversation. Is high street shopping dead? Like, what's happening? Um, and how a lot of these companies have adopted AI, especially Zara. Zara has very smartly adopted AI in a way that I think will transform and revolutionise the way we shop going forward. Also, as well, Google, they've finally let users change their email addresses. I want to talk about that, and Nicki Minaj. How can we not talk about Nicki Minaj? But I think I'm just gonna save that for the next episode. I want this episode to kind of ease us in. Do you know what I mean? And it is because, as well, let me just say, I find January very hard. I don't know if anyone else does, but I do. I find January hard because it is a slow month anyway, but I personally don't get going until like February. So for me, the year starts in February, and I I think I've said it on social media, I probably I probably said it last year on the podcast, but I'm saying it again. I just don't want to do too much in January, I want to ease myself in. Um, I I don't mind things happening around me, but as for me and all the things that I do and develop and deliver, I'm just not gonna feel the pressure that I put on myself unnecessarily. And I feel like the way society builds up January, unwittingly or wittingly, puts pressure on us to you know be chirpy and oh my god, it's 2026. Not everybody feels that way. I definitely don't always feel that way. I feel gratitude, I feel um introspective, I feel almost like slight anxiety as well, because 12 months is not a long time. It's it's actually in the grand scheme of things, it's not a long time, but it's enough time to create an impact, whatever that impact looks like, and I know that I want to be a lot more present on TikTok. I was um accosted, no, I'm joking, um, a very famous, influential, renowned, respected TikToker. I think I can call her a TikToker, and I adore her, and she regularly reaches out to me for advice about certain things and um contract stuff as well. Like she always comes to me and asks me certain questions. I've always advised her over the last few years, and she said to me, you know what, Toya, one thing I love about you is you don't care about going viral, you don't give a shit about algorithms, you're authentic. All you're lacking is being consistent on TikTok. And I think the reason you lack being consistent is because you are in your own head a lot, and I feel like you should just follow what you want to do, do it well, be authentically yourself as you always are, and I think you're gonna be so successful on TikTok. So she's kind of inspired me to kind of take TikTok a lot more seriously, be a lot more intentional, and I want to incorporate fashion, I love fashion. Those are people who are on my Instagram know I love fashion, I really, really do. I like styling and I like it from the perspective of shopping your wardrobe, what you have. Um, I'm coming out with something called Wear Your Shit, where you just wear your shit, okay? Wear what you have. Um, shopping doesn't have to be expensive. I love a good sale, and I want to bring that as part as part of who I am onto TikTok as well, as well as speaking about the world of work, fashion, reality shows. I love all of that. So consistency is the key, I think, for me. One of my keywords on my vision board. Um, also, as well, I I there's so much I need to do for the podcast, and so much I need to do for toy talk. So working on that sister scribble is just honestly, it's my heart. And working on that and creatively developing is is it's not easy. I'm realizing a lot more the things you want to create from conception to manufacturing could take six months, by the way. And I'm trying to beat some of these lead times, and it's difficult because I'm balancing, um I'm wearing a lot of hats, and I'm trying to find time to self-care and rest. And I you know, the other day I was at the post office, and literally there was a line and I was working on my phone. Is this the scribble? I was I've downloaded Adobe, you name it. I anything design related, I've downloaded on my iPhone. I thank God for the capacity that I have on this phone, and I just design, or like if I'm on a caller or I'm waiting for something, I'll just design. I'm working on something, I'm brainstorming for toy talks, I'm doing a lot, you know. So I say all this to say we're easing ourselves into January, or at least on this podcast, we are, and we're being kinder to ourselves, we're injecting a bit of fun as well. I on a personal level, I need to do that. I want to inject a lot more fun. Um, I was told that sometimes I'm a bit too serious, so that was good feedback that I got, self-development. Um, and I also as well I don't want January to be heavy in that you're supposed to have it figured out for the next year because we should just take it quarter by quarter at this point. Anyway, I'm gonna leave it there. Um, hopefully, you guys have learned something, I've taught you something, you've been inspired, you're able to have conversations in your group chat about this episode, the first episode of 2026. I'm really excited about what's to come, what's to be discussed. Email me hello at toytalks.com. If you want us to discuss anything, you've got a dilemma which your anonymity will be protected, or if there's a topic that you want me to elaborate on, talk more about, or just talk about, here is it. This is what we're gonna do. Had a conversation with an a beautiful soul towards the end of last year about shining brightly and using people's insecurities as your stage, especially when they project their insecurities on you. That's an episode all in its own. Anyway, my name is Toya Washington. If you want to follow me on social media, my personal handle is Toya underscore Washington or Toya underscore talks. I'm also on TikTok, Toya underscore Washington. Email us hello at toyatalks.com, hello at sisterscribble.com as well. And if you want to follow me on any social media platform, please feel free to talk about us on your group chat, share the podcast, and I'm wishing you all a great year ahead, happy new year, and happy 2026. My name is Toy Washington, and you have been listening to the Toy Talks podcast.