Toya Talks Podcast
Toya Talks is where culture, courage, and career collide.
Created for Black Women and inclusive of allies, this podcast unpacks the realities of the workplace through the lens of culture, life, and global events. From pay gaps and strikes to leadership, politics, and authenticity, each episode explores how the world around us shapes the way we live and the way we work.
Toya goes beyond surface conversations to deliver bold truths, necessary lessons, and unapologetic strategies that empower listeners to navigate the workplace with clarity and courage.
If you’re ready to rethink work, reclaim your brilliance, and be part of conversations that matter, this is your space.
Toya Talks: Bold truths. Real strategy. For us all.
Toya Talks Podcast
No such thing as a free lunch.
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
A well known brand drops into my inbox, praises my TikTok, then asks for a full video turnaround within hours and never once mentions payment. That one email opens a bigger conversation about workplace boundaries, self-worth, and why I refuse to build any part of my life on “maybe there’ll be future work”. If you are a content creator, freelancer, or employee who is tired of being squeezed for more while being offered less, you will recognise the pattern instantly. We talk rates, budgets, scope, urgency fees, and why milestone payments matter when brands want to use your assets for months.
Then we take it into the workplace, where negotiation is not just about money, it is about power. I share how I approach non-negotiables, from day rate to travel to office attendance, and why I would rather turn down a role than accept terms that guarantee disrespect later. We also sit with a line that hit hard: “The workplace loves Black women’s resilience, just not our boundaries.” We unpack how resilience gets weaponised into over performance, emotional labour, and silence, and how to make resilience work for us instead of against us.
From there, we zoom out to the UK mood after the local elections and the rise of Reform UK, looking at why people vote from pain when rent, bills, wages and NHS access feel broken. We touch on immigration rhetoric, the European Convention on Human Rights, indefinite leave to remain, and the danger of making rights conditional. Finally, we lighten the angle without losing the depth, using the AP x Swatch collaboration to explore luxury marketing psychology, aspiration culture, and why “access” sells even during a cost of living crisis.
If this conversation sharpens your thinking, subscribe, share it with someone who needs firmer boundaries, and leave a review so more people can find Toya Talks.
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Music (Intro and Outro) Written and created by Nomadic Star
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Welcome Back And Life Juggle
SPEAKER_01So, what you all are trying to tell me is your girl can't take a couple of weeks off without Reform UK demonstrating that they have the tightest and strongest stronghold in British political history. I've been telling you all the for literally the last year that this is going to happen. I told you the local recent local elections, anyway, we're gonna get into it. But I just I've been gone for a couple of weeks, honey. My daughter turned three, and no one told me about three major. Yeah, I'm going through it, honey. Work is working. Um, obviously, sister scribble, my stationery company is doing very well. Thank you, Jesus. And I'm just been trying to like, I'm just been, you know, when someone says, you know, toy, you're just juggling. That's imagine constantly just juggling, like literally physically juggling. That is literally what I've been doing for the last few weeks. And you know what? Some some balls had to get dropped, and others, you know, are still being thrown. But let's just get into it. Welcome to the Toy Talks podcast.
SPEAKER_00Toy and talks, council estates, a corporate space, first gen Nigerian set in the face, from Goldman Sachs to PWC, building legacies for all to see. This lecture couldn't stop this though. Lord the creatures, watch me grow. Masters of the game with joke. Every sister how to own their throat. T O I and let me show you how to Not forget and elevate, that's what we do.
Confidence Boundaries And Self-Worth
SPEAKER_01Listen, before we get into the meat, bones, potatoes, the fish and chips of this podcast, let me just tell you. You know, one thing I hope you all take from the podcast, the years that it has been ongoing, the things I've shared, my own personal experiences, the dilemmas, is I always advocate for being boundried. I always advocate for self-respect. And I also advocate for having the confidence to know your own worth. And whether it's something that you learn over time, the objective, first and foremost, is that you gain the confidence to know what you are worth. And I genuinely believe that if you understand your value, you will never ever allow someone to undervalue you. And I hold that very firmly. It's across work, it's across friendships, it's across relationships. And it's a for me, I feel like that needs to be the foundational understanding, especially when you're in the world, because human beings are advantage takers. That's the that's the fact. Human beings are very disgusting individuals. You have to pray that you meet somebody who is like-minded, spiritually touched, understands, you know, um, self-respect, to respect themselves and really understands you as a person, and vice versa. That's what you have to hope. But discernment, on top of that, I feel like confidence and being boundaried is very layered. Yeah. So something happened yesterday. It's at the forefront of my mind. So let's get into it here on the podcast.
A Big Brand Wants Free Work
SPEAKER_01Um, so I obviously do a lot of content across social media. People who have been following me for a while, you guys know I'm not new to this. I grew to this, right? Literally. And um, I'm I've really been conscious on TikTok and on um Instagram. If I have a personal Instagram page that's um private simply because I feel like I have my people's there. And I'm not saying I wouldn't accept people, but for me, I just feel like I don't have to over-explain things. People been on on my private Instagram. I either, if they don't know me personally, they've been following my my Instagram page for a long time. We talk in the DMs, it's very, very nice. Um, and I'm I've tried to be very like intentional with like the Toy Talks Instagram page and of course TikTok. I've really been consciously trying to grow my TikTok because I recognize also that there is a load of people that don't even know that Toy Talks existed. And I've had a lot of feedback from people about how nice it's to see my personality behind the podcast, and you know, it's been nice, and and also as well, I like how like my TikTok is set up in that yes, I talk about the world of work and careers as foundational, but I also show my fashion, I also show like different facets and of me, and it's I I really like TikTok for that. The algorithm is fucked, first of all. Um, but yeah, I'm just so like grateful just to have those what I call creative outlets. So, in growing my TikTok, I have a lot. Well, I shouldn't say a I you know, for me, I'm I'm very neurodivergent in this sense. I always say a lot or a little, there's no gray, and my therapist always tells me and reminds me there's a gray. So I have several videos on TikTok that have gone viral, and I have several videos on TikTok that has gotten me a lot of visibility, and they haven't turned into anything yet, but I'm like I get a lot of like brands that reach out to me and stuff, and for me, um, especially on TikTok, I feel like it has to just make sense. Do you know what I mean? And I just want it to be organic. So um, a brand reached out to me uh yesterday, which was chute, what day is it today, Toya? Monday. A brand reached out to me. So they reached out to me via email at about 11 a.m. And this is a big brand, like they're they're well known. And I say brand, but anyway, let me not give it away. And basically, they said that they really loved my um job hugging video that I did on TikTok. And those of you who follow the podcast know that I I actually did it quite in depth in the podcast, right? So typically um, I do like doing that where I will go in depth and have the conversation. We know we do a deep dive on the podcast, and sometimes I take some of the key elements and then I'll I'll do it on TikTok like two, two, three minutes. And you know, it does really well. And they basically the company basically said, Listen, we love your job hugging video, like we've seen like a few of your videos, and we would really love you to do something for us, and um you know, so we want you to do the job hugging video, and we also want you to answer these questions as part of a video. And could you send it to us by I think it was like either 4 or 5 pm that same day? Am I a dickhead? I I just I let me let me let me just say this, okay? And I'm I'm I I am going to this is my testimonial. First and foremost, yeah. I will never work for free. I'm not doing it. Number one, because I know my value, I know how hard I work to learn how to edit. I taught myself, I'm self-taught, I produce everything. There's a lot of things that go behind what I do. I don't just put the video on and start recording, I really do my research, I really formulate my own views and ideas. I record, I set the lighting, I do this, I do that, and I edit. So when a company reaches out to me, you need to be asking me for my rates and or and or telling me what your budget is. If you want something turned around with that level of urgency, the fact that you think I would do it for free tells me you're buzzing. I don't give a damn your brand name. I couldn't give two fucks because you disrespect any content creator that you reach out to do work and you think that you don't have to pay them because you're riding off the cocktails of your brand name. That don't mean shit to me because I can't go to Waitros, Sainsbury's, Liddle, Audi, Costco, and say, Well, I can't pay this bill, but I can pay this bill on vibes. Vibes is not currency, future um work is not currency, and we need to come out of this thing where we think that we need to suffer and take less because we are preparing what for what the future can can bring. Shoulda, coulda, woulda. I don't live like that, and I'm very strict about it. And this is why I say if you depend on your life, if your future depends on brand deals, you're fucked, and it can never be me. Because I come, I have come from struggle, I have come ground up. So now that I have done, made the sacrifice, you can't come to me and now tell me you want me to do a piece of work, but you're not asking me my rate or anything. And maybe you're adding the urgency because you think that that urgency now removes the the idea of money. Don't be mad, don't be crazy. I could I don't care. Because if you respect what content creators do, then you need to respect that for every request is is a price is attached. And I am gonna do a TikTok about this, first of all, but also from the perspective of how content creators undervalue themselves because they feel that if they challenge, ask, if they don't get paid on time, they can't challenge it because it means they'll be blacklisted and can't do future deals. You need to be radical for yourself, you need to be radical for yourself. Uh you know, one of my friends she says she's radical for Christ. I says, Yes, I'm radical for my ancestors and I'm radical for myself. And part of being radical for myself is having the audacity and the temerity to understand that the person I am, I worked and sacrificed for. I can't work on a hope that one day, if I don't charge or if I undervalue myself, that one day you're gonna know my value. Your engagement with me should be based on a value and it must be monetary. Because in this current climate, this economic climate, I think it's a crime to expect somebody to work for free. That's crazy fucking talk. And I will never be at the mercy of brands. We need to coexist with other revenue streams, and the conditions in which we exist in those revenue streams is that upon signature, anyway, I'm giving away the TikTok that I'm gonna do, but there's milestone payments. You don't get to just give me the money at the end, and those payment terms now I don't get paid for six to twelve months while you're using my assets and my creativity. You're getting paid every month, but you seem to think that you don't have to pay me for another six to twelve months. Chasing and begging, I don't chase and beg for money. My baseline is I don't chase and beg for money. I can't, it can never be me. Because if I have to get to that point, I've already undervalued myself. Let's place respect on me and what I do, and I want to place some respect on you and what you need from me and what you bring to the table. These big brands are big because people like you and I make them big. You cannot be reaping from my audience whilst I've been sowing in yours, but you now are not allowing me to harvest. That sounds very motherfucking crazy, and I'm very, very, very passionate about this because there's too many content creators, and this has been going on for years, where they come and tell us, ah, so-and-so brands, they haven't paid them in six to twelve months. This is a very, very sad story, and I don't want to hear the story anymore. I want to hear the story of being radical for yourself, and that story needs to be if you need something from me, and the turnaround time is tight, the money must be tight and right. That's how I move. Don't ever expect me to use my micros my microphone, my software. Do you know how much do you listen? Do you know how much I've spent on my mics? My mics are very expensive. The ones I use for TikTok, the mic I'm using now, my Shaw mic, sure. Holler at me. I feel like it's a brand deal to be be had. My Mac laptop, my editing software, don't be crazy. There's a lot of upfront cost in the world of work. We put a lot of upfront cost. Is it your education? Is it the learnings that you you guys have have been doing? Is it from master classes that you guys have been doing? Is it from experience that you've sacrificed? Is it the education that you the nights that you had to study, the exams you've taken, those are sacrifices. So when somebody expects you to work for free in this life, that's very wild, that's very mad, and it's very disrespectful. If you respect yourself enough and understand your value because of the confidence that you have grown based on the things that you've had to do to get to where you are, you will never allow somebody to undervalue you. Is it a job offer? Oh, but Toya, the economy is so bad. So at this point, I'm just willing to take any job. Okay, that's fine. But if we take start our relationship from that baseline, you will never be respected in that job. You know, if I have a job interview now and I'm entering a negotiation and an organization refuses to negotiate with me, I will never work there. If you're inflexible before I've signed the contract, you will not be flexible once I've entered. This is how discernment works. It's in practice. Stop expecting people to just do the right thing. They need to be told what the right thing is because you've set the tone of what you expect. Because I don't play those games. And some of you will say, Ah, Toya, this is why some brands won't work with you. Fine, but these are my terms and conditions, and these is this is why I won't work with certain brands who are not willing to come to the table with respect and a check. That's it. I don't work for free. Honey, I'm about to be 42. The only thing I believe is free is peace. Yeah. Free peace is free. You understand? You seek it, you maintain it, and you make sure that you continue to cultivate it. Peace is free, it's a choice. Outside of peace, everything has a price tag, motherfucker. Have you seen the price of a loaf of bread? Are you joking? Even Lidl is getting in on the act. Less than 12 items is now costing me 35 pounds in Lidl. And you're coming to tell me that you your turnaround time is literally within hours. I should now send the assets to this phone number. Are you fucking crazy? And you know when I shared this very high level on my Instagram, the common uh the uh consensus in the DMs is like T, they don't know about you, they just saw you there. And I know they don't know about me because they referred to me as a young person's view. Honey, anyway, I'm young in spirits, that is for sure, honey. But young or not, we are not doing, we're not moving from that place. And the reason why I'm gonna do this TikTok is so other brands can see it and understand when you're coming to email me, you're asking for my rate card andor providing the budget. Outside of that, I don't want to hear it. I've got my daughter's future to think of. I have my own. Multiple revenue streams is important, not a multiple fantasy streams. I don't work with like that. Toya, if you do this for free, then you'll place yourself in a position where in the future they'll want to work with you. Well shit, they will for free too, because that's the tone you've set. A boundaried babe. Can you see how boundaries work across life? A boundaried babe.
Negotiation Tactics And Non-Negotiables
SPEAKER_01I remember um a job interview I had a few years ago, and the lady was there was two of them. This particular lady was just rude. She was rude, like she was just like her butt cheeks, you could tell they must be tight, everything was tight. Like she was she was just giving too much. So I was in a job interview now, and me and the other guy, we got on really, really well, and that's because some of the places I'd worked for um worked in, he'd worked there, and in one particular role, he'd heard of me because of what that contract was. So it was it was we bounced off each other. But the woman, and I get a good cop, bad cop. Cool, I don't care about that. Now, this particular role, they said two times a week in the office, they gave their day rate. Okay, I still went to do the interview. What is in my mind is this, I know what my non-negotiables are, but they're not going to stop me from doing the interview. I need you to fall in love with me. Once you fell in love with me, negotiation becomes easy because you now know who you're negotiating with and what you have the potential of gaining. It's not just me that's gaining, you two are gaining. That's why you have to come with confidence. Now, the woman was now telling me, eh, we have a lot of people to interview. You are one of them, and there's going to be like a second and third stage. She was hyping, hyping. I said, No problem. If you saw me, ah, interview. I'm very chilled, you know. Ah, I'm a very nice person. It's just don't step on my foot. That's all. Don't step on my foot. I was about to say, don't step on my bunions, but I don't have any bunions. Thank you. So I had let's say I had the interview on Monday. By Wednesday, ah, the agency, the way they were ringing my phone, ringing my phone down. Uh uh. The way they were ringing me, I said, what is this? What is what? What is this? Oh, Toya. Um, so and so company, yeah. They loved you. Oh, they loved you. They said that they they really want to give you the offer. This is the day where I said, hold your horses, love. I said, Hold it up. Scrut scrut. I said, Wait. I said, first of all, I'm not going into that office twice a week. I can go once a month and they pay for it because I don't even know why I'm going in once a month. It's just now gonna be a routine. Now fighting for seats, fighting for this, fighting for this, fighting for a room for private conversation, leaving my house to get to that office is money. Who's paying? Not me. Unless you bake it into the day rate. That's number one. I said, number two, this day rate doesn't work for me. You're asking for somebody who has X amount of years experience. No, absolutely not. This is the day rate. She goes, Oh, they may not accept. I said, That's not my problem. I'm telling you the terms and conditions here. This is it. If they're not interested, no problem. Let's let's continue looking. So about 45 minutes, she called me back. Oh, yes, they're willing to do once a month. But they said that they will do make sure that there's a reason, otherwise, there's some months I won't come in. And my day rate, uh-huh, they will accept. I said, Okay, great. And they said, Oh, but one thing is they they will expect you to do like travel, like to like Birmingham or Manchester and on an ad hoc basis. I said, ad who? She said, ad hoc. I said, no, not ad hoc. Sorry, that doesn't work for me. She said, yeah, they're not gonna budge on that. I said, that's no problem. I'm not budging on that either. She's like, yeah, but they've conceded on the other things. I said, yeah, but you're not understanding that my lap my baseline for the negotiation is limit travel. Now you're telling me that she could just call me on a Thursday evening and say, ah, we need you in Birmingham on Friday. And because now it's in the contract, ad hoc, I will be ad hocing. No, I can't do that. Sorry. That's not how this is gonna work. I said, So they're not negotiating. She said it's a non-negotiable. I said, well then that doesn't work for me. I said, I'm turning the role down. She goes, Oh, but you might not get enough. I said, excuse me, please. When it comes to where I can and cannot and what I cannot just where I don't accept this role doesn't mean I can I won't get other roles. She goes, Yeah, but it's gonna, I said, let it be hard. I will find a way. The same way you told me they won't negotiate on rate and this compulsory twice a week in office. Look at where we are now. But they have to hold on to something to feel like they've gained. No, that's that doesn't work. If they want me to go to Manchester and they have to get somebody else to do that. I I don't, I'm not set up in that way to do it. And I'm gonna be really honest, my child was still very young, so I wasn't willing to do that. I say all of this to say when it comes to negotiation, I always aim for a win-win situation. Yeah, but some people they will negotiate and they will have no negotiable that they'll negotiate and they'll be stuck on things that are not important. You should be focusing on other things. Like, for example, I've said once a month, now you need to now find out why I'm coming in that once a month so that there's value in my attendance. You need to now secure, make sure that I'll be able to get a desk because all these things are going to be very important. Otherwise, I'm gonna be like, nope, I'm not coming in at all. These are things you need to focus on. You're now telling me you need somebody that has my skill set to start ASAP, and you're now telling me about ad hoc Birmingham. That's mad. If you know your value, if you understand your non negotiables, you're able to enter into conversation, keeping them in mind, but being open to hear what they have to say. But a non negotiable that I have for social media and in my entire life is that I will not work for free. I'm battling with. Low iron, I'm rate, I'm raising a three-year-old, I'm a wife, I have a career, and I have many jobs, honey. And then on top of that, I should be doing this job for free. Who do you think is investing? All the money being invested and reinvested in Sister Scribble comes from me. So I'm now working for free. How does my value look to you if I'm able to work for free? It means that I don't know my value enough to for you to communicate to you what you should be paying me. I remember last year one company reached out to me, a PR company. Hmm. If if I could name and shame these companies, they'll be shaking. Shaking. This PR company is very well known. They reached out to me based on a TikTok video that has gone viral, and they asked me if I could promote um a new program that was coming out. And this particular program actually relates to kind of what I do on the pod. They said they're gonna pay me £50. I wrote back, I literally said, Is everything okay over there? Because it's missing a zero. I wrote it. So the woman asked me for my number. I gave her my number, she called me. I said, So let me get this right. You want me to take £50 to edit, record, scope, watch, and review a new program. She said yes. I said, let me be very, very clear. I will never work for that £50 because the work that I've said that I would need to do is in excess of £500, so that's not gonna happen. They said, Oh, maybe we can um go to like 60. I said to her, Sorry, I've got another call coming through. That was the end of that. Now don't get me wrong, yeah. In this economy, money is money, but that's not the money that I can take for the work I have to put in. I remember when I was younger, and I would take jobs that will pay me, and I had no money left to eat properly. That can't happen. We're not in that, we're not in that lane anymore. You understand? I'm hoping that I'm giving you these examples of things to explain value on a practical level. Whether you're a content creator, a business owner, an employee, value is value across the board. It has the same definition. If you undervalue yourself, you're teaching people how to value you. Simple, and they just won't. And don't get me wrong, I understand the privilege of having a nine to five and doing content creation, but that's also because I don't want to be at the mercy of nobody. I really don't. I need to be the architect of my career and also influence the um the direction of my own future. So that means that I have to set the terms and conditions of engagement. If you do not pay me, I'm not gonna work for free. Them nappies cost money. Them wet wipes cost money, honey. This wig costs money. The knickers I am wearing, these parachutes cost money. Electricity, unko, every April. We are now doing price rises. But you want me to use my same electricity to now do what you need me to do. Because now you've got a tight turnaround time. That even increases the money I should be paying, I should be charging you, but yet you think it should be free. Who are you, please? Who actually are you? Is everybody mad? Yes, everybody's mad. Well, since you want to be mad, let me give you the answer, dudes. No. So hot on the tails
Resilience Versus Boundaries At Work
SPEAKER_01of this topic. I recently saw a post on threads, and I had to screenshot this post, and I really wanted to get into it the next time I podcasted, and it's by Elias underscore intelligence on threads, and it reads, The workplace loves black women's resilience, just not our boundaries. And I thought, yeah, it is so true, and I do want to explore the resilience element of it because I feel like with what we've just been talking about about value and confidence, you know, that kind of talks to boundaries. And I'm speaking as a woman, full stop new paragraph, and as a black woman. So remember, just because I'm talking from a black woman's perspective, I don't ignore or forget that women in general are experiencing this, irrespective of race or ethnicity. But when we talk about um and nuance um this topic and talk about black women, it's because black women have always been depicted as having to suffer to shoulder to accommodate, and we'll just fall down and get back up. There's an expectation that we're gonna walk through the fire and the flames, and it's fucking exhausting. I feel like what was posted, um, and obviously what I took as wanting to kind of discuss further, is about being strong, resilient, adaptable, and reliable. And for me, I really do think that it's like a code word for absorbing dysfunction, overperforming without recognition, especially in the world of work, emotional labor and tolerating bad behavior and constantly being expected to carry pressure quietly. So you're literally folding under the pressure, but you should just withstand it because you're with resilient. And I genuinely think that the solution is not to stop being resilient. I think the solution is learning how to make resilience work for us instead of against us. In that same breath, we know that the workplace often rewards women, especially black women, for surviving unhealthy environments instead of us like questioning why we had to survive them in the first place. And I definitely feel like in industries where we are underrepresented, resilience can be like it quietly becomes like hyper-independence, overperforming, emotional suppression, perfectionism, chronic, chronically having to prove ourselves, and just the erosion of boundaries. And I feel like the definitely the danger that then kind of occurs is the survival behaviors get mistaken for like leadership strengths. And let's be real, resilience for many of us black women isn't about bouncing back from challenges, it's actually about this learning how to function whilst feeling unsupported, learning how to endure discomfort without complaining, or what is perceived as complaining, just enduring discomfort and doing it silently, and learning how to keep producing while emotionally exhausted. I definitely think that I'm guilty of that. Um, I also think it's like learning very early that failure often isn't afforded to us, like we're expected to win all the time. And I definitely think the whole resilience is also tabled in how to survive environments that weren't built with us in mind. And I definitely believe that then resilience becomes a completely different conversation. And I think it's really important to acknowledge that resilience is not inherently unhealthy, but the issue is when resilience becomes like our default operating system, because survival mold is useful in emergencies, but it does become dangerous when it becomes like our permanent state of existence. And I truly believe that in the world of work, um, as black women, we're not rewarded for our resilience, not in the conventional way of being rewarded. I feel like what is being rewarded is how we absorb pressure, um, how we absorb dysfunction, emotional labor, chaos, poor leadership, a lack of planning, and unrealistic expectations. And I feel like it's really important that I say that because I feel like we've been conditioned in society to believe that the more dysfunction, the more disorder, the more chaos, the more of a lack of anything in the workplace, we should be able to absorb it. And then that makes us resilient. And I think it's a very poor and very broken definition of what resilient is. So if I was to speak to maybe a white counterpart about resilience, her definition of resilience and her actual experience of resilience is very different from mine as a woman of colour. I want you to sit with this for a moment and just consider this. A lot of us black women aren't rewarded for excellence, we're rewarded for endurance. And I definitely believe this, and it it it is polarized in the lack of support in the world of work or how an organization supports bad behavior and almost congratulates you for suffering through it. That's mad. So this may play on your mental health. This is not acceptable behavior, this is below the level of expected professionalism we'd expect from XYZ person. But because you've been able to go the course, it's acceptable. That's mad, and you are rewarded for that endurance with a pat on the back, less so a pay rise, but more oh, you can keep your job. It's those unsaid things, and that's why I feel like resilience, especially how they depict it with black women, is very toxic. A lot of black women we're taught how to survive, and a lot of us have come from a space of survival, but survival and safety are not the same thing. I at some point we do have to ask ourselves, am I thriving here? Or have I just become extremely good at enduring, extremely good at sustaining suffering, extremely good of just tolerating, accepting. And I feel like when I saw that quote, that's kind of what it threw up for me. The workplace loves black women's resilience, just not our boundaries. So yeah, I just I I definitely, you know, for me, I saw the quote and I was like, yeah, I'm bringing it to the podcast. Let's have like a very brief discussion about it because I definitely think we go through so much as women in the world of work, collectively as women, but we can't ignore the experiences that are very unique to us as black women because of how we are seen in the world of work, and even those people who are tokenized in the world of work, that level of resilience attached to that tokenism is heavy, it's a heavy cross to carry, it's a heavy weight to bear because the expected tolerance of resilience like resilience is very high and it's very toxic because what you perceive as or what is kind of positioned as resilience is what you're willing to endure and suffer through. And it's like I mean, you know, I have worked with somebody who you know is a bully and has made people cry and is unprofessional and is disrespectful, and nothing is done. The organization protects people like that. And insofar as I just tolerate, then the reward is well done. As soon as you use the systems to raise issue, oh how dare she not endure, how how dare she not suffer? No, she's not very resilient, and this is why I talk about um being strategic, and this is why I talk about understanding how we navigate, because I think there is a balance where you have boundaries and allow patterns to occur safely, i.e., not compromising your mental health and enforcing your boundaries. And I've always advocated for advocating for yourself because it's so important. Advocating for yourself is critical to sustaining a level playing field in the world of work when it comes to your mental health, and our stories are all very similar about the world of work because we no longer want to endure, suffer in chaos, dysfunction, unprofessionalism, toxicity. We want to find healthy spaces, a balance of healthy spaces. And whilst no workplace is ever perfect, we're not expecting perfectionism. We are expecting a level of equality of what we are experiencing. You can't say a certain behavior is unacceptable, but yet if you if you're not as an organization addressing it, you become complicit and then you raise issue. If we raise issue because we're not being resilient enough to endure suffering. That's that's crazy. So obviously,
Reform UK And Emotional Voting
SPEAKER_01when we open in this podcast, I did speak about the recent local elections, and I did cover it on TikTok. I just want to cover it on the podcast simply because I have been saying it for over a year now about the dangers of reform kind of governing this country, and I think the local elections have basically showed us that the possibility is very real, especially for those people that were maybe thinking that it was out of reach for um reform. And I think everyone can see with a lot of the seats that were won, but more importantly, just the effects that reform is having because people don't always vote from the best option, they don't they don't vote for the best option from a position of what is the best option for them. And I definitely think in these local elections, people have been voting from a position of pain. And I don't think the local elections were just about politics, they were about emotions. When people feel abandoned, they feel that that they need to stop voting for stability, especially when the stability that they've been seeking doesn't actually exist. People are struggling, rent is high, energy bills are high, NHS waiting lists are becoming longer and longer. Accessing NHS services has become even more difficult, probably the worst it's been. Um, and wages feel very stagnant. Young people are definitely feeling locked out of the housing market, and overall, public trust is collapsing. So when people feel like the system isn't working for them anymore, they stop voting for maintenance and they start voting for disruption. So, where we have seen like the reform dominating certain areas or winning seats where they have never won before, it's it's demonstrating that people are voting from a space of emotion. And I definitely think people are not like when we we are hearing feedback from people, people talking about the political landscape. I don't think they're really looking at the position in which the voters are in that is influencing how they vote. The the the local elections were purely, in my in my humble opinion, emotional votes. Um I want to quickly touch on immigration. Um, immigration becomes like the easiest like topic to point at because it's visible, so it gives people something tangible to attach their frustrations on when actually there's a bigger picture at play. Um, the danger is that when people become so emotionally exhausted, they stop interrogating like the wider consequences of policies, especially the reform policies that are attached to that frustration. And I definitely think there is a deeper issue at play. Um, I do want to talk about some of Reform UK's policies. So they want to withdraw from the European Convention of Human Rights, um, abolishing, like really heavily restricted indefinite um abolishing and or heavily restricting indefinite leave to remain. So those people have who have ILR, um, and they they're looking to expand deportation powers. So there has been suggestion in that they do want to have like an ICE style method of what they say of you know, arresting and deporting what who they define as illegal immigrants, and we need to have a clarification on that definition according to reform, to be honest. And they're also Reform UK are also looking to restructure immigration rights and protections. And Reform UK have publicly stated that it would abolish indefinite leave to remain and replace it with a re like a renewable visa system, whilst also advocating for the withdrawal from the European Convention of Human Rights. So this conversation is bigger than just immigration numbers, it's about what happens when rights become conditional andor removed. Because once a country becomes comfortable removing protections from one group of people or several groups of people, history does show us that powers really stay contained. Like it's very rare for such powers to stay contained, and that is massive. The impact of some of their policies will fundamentally destroy this country, and this country is already being destroyed, but what you're doing now is eroding and attacking, taking, removing, withdrawing people's rights. And I think because people are voting from a position of emotion, they're not thinking about the bigger picture. The local elections didn't just reveal political division, they revealed emotional division. A country tired of struggle, a country that just completely losing trust, and a country looking for someone, anyone, who sounds certain, who sounds like change is literally on the horizon. And we all know that history shows us that certainty can be incredibly persuasive in uncertain times, even if that certainty doesn't have a great foundation. It's change, it's disruption. And when people feel unheard for long enough and they stop asking for reform, they just literally ask for disruption. And that ultimately is driving reform UK, disruption, chaos, change, immigration.
AP Swatch And Luxury Psychology
SPEAKER_01So let's talk about the collaboration between AP and SWATS for a second. So the standard entry level AP is typically around $20,000 to $30,000. I don't know what the conversion rate in pounds is, please, honey. I'm recording this quietly. I'm not doing that conversion. But the higher-end APs are about, they go for about six figures, and you have certain models exceeding $100,000, right? So I believe this swatch collaboration is between $400 to $420, which I think works out to about $350,400, something like that. Yeah, don't quote me. And you know, I don't know if you guys have seen like the big hoopla over AP and this swatch collaboration. Um, and I do want to explore it a bit more deeply because I feel like people are like, oh, this bringing down the brand, this collaboration. But access is actually very important, and it's something I don't think people have considered within their commentary. I think people also assume that because of the financial and economic hardship, that this will ultimately kill consumerism, but historically, it does actually quite the opposite. Um, luxury for many people is about escapism. I definitely know for me it's escapism. For some people, it's about identity, proximity to status, emotional reward, and proof that you're still doing okay. We are watching people struggle with rent, bills, stagnant wages, economic uncertainty and Anxiety, but people will still cute overnight for a roughly 350-pound watch. Um, so clearly, this isn't about timepieces, uh, it's more about what luxury actually represents psychologically. It's more about the aspiration culture, soft luxury, performative success, social media validation, for example, and ownership of symbolism rather than ownership of wealth itself, especially with this collaboration. So I'll give you an example. Bista Village is a great example of this. So Bista Village um exists because luxury brands have also realized something really unique and very important that people may not be able to afford like runway versions of pieces, but they still want access to that feeling. And this is very similar to the AP and Swatch collaboration. You may never own like a 30,000 pound dollar royal oak, but you still want to participate and have access to that culture, and it's really powerful because luxury has traditionally like depended on exclusion, for example. So now brands are trying to maintain prestige while still monetizing accessibility, hence Abista Village. And honestly, the tension between kind of exclusivity and monetizing that accessibility is what's driving this AP and swatch conversation. So you've got diehard AP owners and they're angry about this collaboration for them. Where is the exclusivity? They're not special. So when you think about luxury and the way it works, it works on scarcity, it works on exclusivity, it works on gatekeeping and having very high barriers to entry. So you have some AP collectors who feel like the collaboration with Swatch and AP cheapens AP because this whole like image and prestige is now available to a mass market price. Now, there's a counter-argument that this doesn't actually dilute the brand and it actually like strengthens its cultural relevance. You've got younger consumers that may never buy a £50,000 watch, but they want to become emotionally attached to the brand early. Hence why you have luxury brands that now understand the attention that you know this collaboration has brought, but equally that attention also equals currency. And we're living in a social media era with TikTok economy, cultural visibility really matters, and it's it's almost as much as it also is worth as much as exclusivity, in my opinion. I think for years, like AP watches has existed mostly, and like you see that in rap videos, celebrity wrists, athletes, billionaires. It's a it's a symbolism of success, yeah, when you see an AP. It's heavily blinged out, you know when you you've seen an AP and you equate riches to an AP. So this collaboration between AP and Swatch, it collapses the distance between, you know, just the observer, somebody watching from a distance, and actually being able to participate. And then suddenly the average person can wear something visibly linked to elite culture, and the fantasy of that luxury AP becomes accessible, it becomes touchable, it becomes close. And I think that's why for people there is like a lot of emotion about it. It's not just, oh, I bought a swatch, it's more about oh, I accessed a world that usually excludes me, but here I am in Swatch, spending my £350 for this collaboration between AP and Swatch. Um, so I I also think that people are not just buying products anymore, they're really buying like the viral, like being viral, like this participation, cultural relevance, and having internet moments, especially in a social media era. So the cues that you see outside days before is like social proof of the need for people to access and be a part of what they believe has up until now been a very exclusive, rich society, if you like, when it comes to AP watches. I know it sounds deep, but I really love like the psychology of the way people are like positioning this. Um, you're it's more I think it's more than just owning an item. It's like I was there, I got one, I'm part of this whole AP and swatch conversation. So I feel like if you compare the psychology of that to like, you know, like Kanye used to do exclusive sneaker drops with Adidas, like there'd be a limited edition, it'd be early in the morning, and as soon as it drops, boom, people are there up for maybe four or five in the morning for a drop at 8:30 or 8 o'clock in the morning. Remember the Stanley Cup cups before now they flooded the market, the Labooo Boos is is another one, and then you have like other like you know, sneaker release releases like Nike, for example, they still do like their exclusive drop. I think like the key message, especially like with this this collaboration with AP and Swatch, is that luxury is no longer purely about wealth anymore, it's about access to identity, aspiration, and belonging. And where the AP element of exclusive luxury once existed, this collaboration has smashed that. I also think a lot of luxury brands are understanding that because of the economic crisis that currently exists and the cost of living, they still want to make money. So they have to have a version that's accessible, and that's why you have like Bister Village, Ashford, um, and like massive outlets in America, and you have also designers like Gucci that will create lines specifically for outlets because if like people want a piece of what luxury means to them within an affordable price point, so what you once deemed as exclusive is not as exclusive as you think it is, just because you've paid over and above what the average person can afford. It doesn't work like that anymore. My husband will sit here and discuss consumerism with you all day long, but the reality is whether you consume at what is considered a reasonable price point or you consume at a luxury price point, we're all accessing a level of consumerism, we're all accessing a level of what we deem is exclusivity because either you want to be part of a movement, you want escapism, you are a collector, there is an emotional attachment. It's about degree. Are you willing to line up four or five days before a drop? Are you willing? What like it's almost like the level of sacrifice people are going to and the length people are going to to feel part of an exclusive club is the psychology we should be discussing and how this is now being monetized by luxury brands. We should have that discussion.
Final Takeaways And How To Write
SPEAKER_01Listen, I'm gonna leave the podcast there. I hope that you've enjoyed this episode as much as I've enjoyed delivering it. Um, for me, I genuinely think that the podcast has something for everyone. And yeah, sometimes you're not everyone's cup of tea, but I know who my audience is. I adore you guys. Thank you for your support, your downloads, your listens, your reviews, your comments, your feedback. Um, let's just keep it moving. And if you have a life or work-related dilemma, your anonymity will be protected. Email hello at toytalks.com. Um, I will continue to produce, edit, and put out content. And I really thank you all for your support. My name is Toya Washington, and you have been listening to the Toy Talks podcast.
SPEAKER_00Just really talking, I want it. Oh, we don't just five minutes, five minutes. Oh, it's not we'll go, let's still go.