Fertility Forward
Fertility Forward
Ep 188: The Lucky Egg with Dr. Lucky Sekhon
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What if you could find joy through your infertility journey? Today on Fertility Forward, we welcome Dr. Lucky Sekhon back to the show to tell us about her amazing book, The Lucky Egg, and how it supports women battling fertility lovingly, practically, and by encouraging them to focus on the journey, not just the destination. Tuning in, you’ll hear all about what inspired Dr. Sekhon to write this book, how her incredible team helped her make it happen, why she wanted readers to feel like they were reading a book written by a friend, not a doctor, and so much more! We delve into how Dr. Sekhon detached from the outcome and surrendered to the process when writing this book, and how powerful doing that is, before discussing the mental health pieces of infertility she touches on in the book. Dr. Sekhon goes on to share her own struggles with secondary infertility and how it made her a more empathetic fertility doctor. We also talk about the importance of compassion in the fertility space and why comparison is so dangerous. Finally, and as always, we share what we are grateful for. Thanks for listening!
Everyone, we are Rena and Dara, and welcome to Fertility Ford. We are part of the wellness team at RMA of New York, a fertility clinic affiliated with Mount Sinai Hospital in New York City. Our Fertility Ford podcast brings together advice from medical professionals, mental health specialists, wellness experts, and patients because knowledge is power and you are your own best advocate.
SPEAKER_02So it's been a while, but I'm so happy. We're both so happy to have one of our super incredible, one of our FaZe reproductive endocrinologists at RMA, Dr. Lucky Seacon. And she's back for something special. She created this incredible new book called The Lucky Egg. And she's here today to tell us all about it. We're so happy to have you back on.
SPEAKER_01Oh my God. It's been too long. And I feel like I miss seeing you guys. I mean, we've worked together so closely and collaborated on so many of our patients' care. And I just love speaking with both of you. I feel like I always learned so much.
SPEAKER_00So I feel very honored to be invited back. Thank you so much for coming on. And I mean, what a reflective moment. I feel like we kind of all grew up at RMA. And, you know, we've all become these amazing working women using our voices in this space to really empower others. I really think that's the theme among the three of us is our individual expertises to empower women in this space and share our own stories to help smash the shame, smash the stigma. One of the things I love about your Instagram account is that you are providing real education, real facts. And I think that is so important in today's world. So thank you for taking your time, which really is your own free time to do that because you truly care.
SPEAKER_01Well, I appreciate both of you so much. I mean, obviously, when it comes to patient care, it's so important to take a multidisciplinary approach. And I just think that you guys each have like your superpowers, essentially, and your areas that you focus on, which are so equally important to the tests and the treatments that I might recommend or prescribe. And I talk about that a lot in the book. Like a huge focus of this book is mental health. A huge focus of this book is nutrition, lifestyle. What are the levers that you can pull? Because in a world where so much feels out of our control, it is really helpful, I think, to be able to have guidance, practical guidance on what you should be doing day in, day out, in a way that's not shaming you, in a way that's not making people feel like suffocated because sometimes it feels like the laundry list of supplements and all the things that people are telling you to do. It's like, oh my God, you know, I can't I just live my life. And I think you, all of us, all of us collectively as a group have collaborated not just with patient care, but on social media and at different events. And I just love taking that multidisciplinary approach. I think it's how all patient care should be handled. I think that's how all medicine should be handled. I think that's how you get the most out of your visit with your doctor is to not just focus on what can be prescribed, but how can you take care of your mental health and what can you be doing at home? I mean, food is the best medicine, right?
SPEAKER_00Well, it's always what's under the hood of the car, right? You know, and I would say to my patients, like pills aren't skills, right? Sometimes we need a medication to balance, you know, our brain chemistry, because if we don't balance the brain chemistry, we can't get to a place where then we can have the breakthroughs, then we can get out of ourselves, then we can make changes. Yeah. But a pill is not a skill. You're not done because you take a medication. And so I think that's this holistic approach. And I so appreciate working with other providers that have the same ideology. I think that's really important.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. So I'm super curious to hear how this came about. I have loved also watching, like following you on Instagram and seeing your story, seeing your day-to-day, like your rushing from home, your weekend activities. You are very real. And I think that's a big reason why people love following you. Did this lead you into the book? Yeah. Is this something you had always wanted to do?
SPEAKER_01No, it wasn't something that I always wanted to do, not because I didn't think it was important, because I was kind of hoping and waiting around for someone else to do it, because writing a book is hard. And it's not something that, you know, there's a difference between putting together a 60-second video or a carousel post versus trying to write a whole damn book. Okay. It's like I didn't even know what I was getting into. And I kind of arrived at this very organically. I mean, you guys know from the last time I was on this show how I stumbled into the whole social media thing. Again, totally not what my vibe was. I actually thought it was cringy, unprofessional. But COVID, the pandemic, kind of pushed me into that realm because I'm like, this is the only way I can connect with people, and we're not islands. Like, we need to connect, especially during scary times like that. And I was pregnant. Anyway, I think I continue to love social and showing up there, but I did begin to grow frustrated with it as I became a little bit more comfortable and seasoned. I was like, I just feel like I'm never gonna really get to the heart of the problem because there's always gonna be gaps and there's no easy-to-search index, and people are gonna constantly always be DMing me, which I invite, but saying, like, okay, great that you did a post on Letch Resolve, but like, do you have anything on Clomet or do you have it? And I was just like, you know, I do feel like we need an all-encompassing resource, like a Bible almost, where it's like any fertility-related question, you can go to the index and you can look it up, and there's something for everyone. So I started thinking about that in 2023, but I was like, how? When? Like, how would this all go down, you know? And I think the prospect of writing a book and then trying to convince other people that this book is a good idea, like it just seemed overwhelming to me as someone with a busy full-time job. But the universe sometimes just aligns itself when something is supposed to happen. And once I decided I do want to write a book, I don't have any plan of how I'm gonna get there, but I wrote it down and actually published it as an Instagram post, I believe, in January of 2024. And it was like January 1st, and I'm like, here are my goals. And I listed it as a big thing. I remember that post. I remember that. I had no plan, and I was like, this is kind of scary and vulnerable, but I'm just gonna put it out there because I feel like it'll hold me accountable. And I actually think it's insane this story, but I'll tell you in a nutshell because I want to leave time to talk about all the other interesting things. But this is like a Hallmark movie, if you can even call it that. Basically, a friend who also like throws her eggs with me, she followed me on Instagram, and we were chatting during one of her visits, and we were just like chatting about like long-term goals. And I said to her something about, yeah, maybe I'd want to write a book one day. Maybe that would be like a bigger goal. She didn't mention anything about who she works with, who she knows. And she contacted me weeks later and was like, Hey, do you still want to write that book? It was actually months later, and I was like, Oh, yeah, or like bottom of my to-do list. She's like, Well, one of my really good friends is going through infertility, and she said she's been relying on your posts. She's gotten more information from you than her clinic. And she was like, Would she ever want to write a book? Because I can't find a single resource and I work in publishing. And I was like, Yeah, I'll set up a meeting. And so we had this crazy brainstorm session. By the end of it, we pretty much had like a proposal outline. She taught me how to write a book proposal. She like coached me through it. By the time she ended up becoming my patient, and by the time I got the book deal that same week, she found out she was pregnant from IVF from us. And the weekend that I finished writing my manuscript and handed it in in March 2025, she had her baby. Ooh, chill. No. And when we matched with my editor at McMillan, she came to our first meeting with a notebook filled with notes that she had written from all the lives of mine that she had watched. So it's like a team of warrior, IVF warrior women that have all assembled together and truly care about the mission of this book. And that's what makes it really so special. And even the cover is you can see in the background, there's this painting, right? That is by an artist who is my former patient who carries the Braca one and two mutation. And she paints these beautiful abstract pieces that she's like, either they're boobs or eggs, depending on who's who's asking. But she throws a bunch of eggs because she plans to create embryos and test them for the Braca One and Two mutation later down line. So that inspired the concentric circle on the front of my cover. So it's really like it's just so organic. I can't even explain how organic this is. It's not even like I set out and did something, it was like the universe really assembled all the right people.
SPEAKER_02And the perfect title. Like I love the double entendre. It's it's so cute. And I also love the inside. You know what I find sometimes when there's a lot of technical information to get out, it can be sometimes dull and boring. You made a lot of light, like that you brought a lot of lightness to it. A lot of that was the goal. Yeah, which makes it more readable. And you know, I think people who are struggling with infertility or you know, trying to get pregnant, it can be such a serious thing and it can be quite emotional. And to bring some of that, you know, that lightness to it kind of, you know, it feels like it's a friend speaking to you in a way.
SPEAKER_01That was really the goal. I mean, we see it whenever we have consults with patients, and I'm sure you guys see this sometimes. There's just something very anxiety provoking, and like the amount of apprehension people walk into your office with, they don't know what you're gonna tell them. Like it's very nerve-wracking. And I just feel like what we really need is a warm and friendly tone. And I really want it to feel like when someone's reading the book or listening to the audiobook, they feel like they have a best friend who just happens to be a fertility doctor that's kind of feeding them information and coaching them along the way.
SPEAKER_00I want to go back to something that you said when you were talking about your process that you surrendered, you let go, you weren't attached to it. You weren't, you know, I have to get this done, it has to be this, all these goals. You just this happened, you know, and then you look into it. And I think that's one reflected in your book, as Dara said, right? There's so much joy, it's light, it's it's so easy. And also just sort of, you know, the general idea of in life, when we surrender, when we let go, when we stop trying to force something, right? You have like, I have to do this because this is a measure of success. And if I don't do this, you know, XYZ, it just sort of it happened, you leaned in. And that in life is, I think, the secret to unlocking things. And I know that all of us see our patients, they come in and they're so attached to online, right? That I have to be a parent by this birthday or this sibling's wedding or this person's bridal shower. And that takes them so much out of the process. Yes, because they become so focused on that one thing that they're locked into it and they lose sight of the bigger picture. And it's when we can let go of that and we can just say, I'm in this process, I'm surrendering, and I'm just gonna ride it out. That's when things happen.
SPEAKER_01It felt like a very beautiful lesson and moment in my life because you know, you always hear people being in a flow state, and that's what it felt like. Because it was kind of like, I'm just open to opportunities, and it really was like the right people at the right time. And it's really like one of the most thrilling things that has ever happened to me. And it's because it really brought together a lot of the different things that make me passionate about my calling, taking care of patients, meeting a need, but also educating and filling in that huge knowledge gap. And I really feel proud of the contribution. And I and what's exciting now is like it takes a while, right? It came out three months ago, but now I'm finally starting to see patients that are like, I've read the book, and I do see how it's really transformative in giving people all the tools they need so they can come in and have a higher level conversation with so much of a deeper understanding than I've ever seen people be able to achieve before meeting with me. And it's so gratifying. That's like the best part of all of this.
SPEAKER_00Well, also because look at that, it wasn't about you, it wasn't for your own personal goals, your own personal achievements. It was you wanted to help people and empower them.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and I honestly my next hope for the future, since I'm speaking things into existence in this universe, yeah, is because everyone's kind of like it's just human nature to be like, so what's the next thing? What's the next book? And I'm like, again, I'm going to just let things happen. But my hope, my secret hope is that the next book or thing that I'm writing is maybe like the next version because you know the science has advanced so much. And there are always going to be changes, and so there will definitely be an update. The question is, how quickly will the science move? And will that update need to happen in three years or in five years? That's exciting to me.
SPEAKER_00Well, so I think you say this is just the beginning. Yeah. And, you know, I always say to patients, you know, yes, so exactly that. You know, if you live in a state where it's something happens and then you don't even take the time to sit in that because you're already focused on the next, then you're not in a flow state. You're not being. Yes. But when you're in a state of, you know, just sort of existing and expanding and sort of just trusting, that's when it does. And and you know what I say is we should always all be evolving. We should always have goals. There's a big difference between having goals and evolving and changing and not being able to be present. Yeah. And that's it. You know, you're never done, right? You're done when you're not on the first anymore. So it should always be like a what's next. But if it takes you outside of your present, that's when you know there's work to do there. But yeah.
SPEAKER_01And I think a lot of people don't realize that that's the reality because you're always searching for the next big thing. And then you think once you get that thing, you're gonna be happy. And I think a big example of that is in the space that we work in, right? Like people are like, my biggest life problem right now is going through this infertility journey. And once I'm on the other side of this, though, like everything's gonna be perfect. And I think that something that's a huge message in all of the mental health that I kind of infused through the book. And by the way, Rena, I want to say, like, for both of you, both of you, including all of the professionals that I work with, because it's not just thinking about the food we eat and how we treat our mental health, but we have genetic counselors, we have embryologists, like all of the different areas of expertise of my colleagues who are like my family. Like, you guys are like family. We've worked together now for almost a decade. It's crazy to think about all that's been infused. So, like a lot of the mental health stuff, you're probably gonna recognize your own voice in that, Rena, because I've heard you speak to so many patients and coach them, and we've done so many webinars and things together. And it's like something that I think is really important is about finding ways to mine joy and live your life because this could be a marathon for most people, it's not a sprint. And if we wait till a certain moment or goal is achieved to then feel happy and then live our lives, it's like what you might not realize is that on the way to get to that goal, you've let everything else go and you kind of forget who you are as a person. And so that's a huge message in this. And I think everything you're talking about in terms of like goal setting, making it your identity, like not going with the flow, I think a lot of those are lessons that we can also impart to our patients about how to think about the journey and how to be able to stop and smell the roses and appreciate your relationships and your life is worth living with or without achieving certain goals, right? And unlike many of the goals in our life in when it comes to career and whatnot, the amount of effort you put in doesn't equal what you get out. And infertility is really unfair. And so we can't hold ourselves to that same standard when it comes to those types of life goals, and we really do have to be able to go with the flow, and it's easier said than done, and it's such a hard challenge for so many people. But I've seen so many of my patients work through and come to this understanding and end up so much happier and whole on the other end of it all, regardless of where their journey has taken them. Because I think you learn a life lesson that you're whole and valuable as you are. It's okay for things to not be perfect and for you to be working towards this big goal. And it's okay for things to not always be like positive and happy all the time. I mean, we all struggle, but the key is how do you handle that struggle and how do you treat yourself along the way? It's not just the destination, it's the journey.
SPEAKER_00Sure. Well, you know, I know Dara and I are both very into Kabbalah, and thank you to Dara for exposing me to that. But, you know, it's just been in that sort of practice, it's just been this big shift in the universe of really leaning into the heaviness and just being in that and just knowing that out of the darkness comes the light, and we have to just go with it. You know, same with the year of the snake, right? We just, you know, in that culture, we just year of the snake shedding, right? It's all about shedding, it's all about welcoming the new. And so it's being able to have the faith, have the ability to get through the challenges and be able to say, and and something, I know that you cancel your patients in this way, which I so appreciate because something I focused with on them is if they're so caught up on just a positive beta is a success and anything else is a failure, you lose it. And exactly what you said, this is the long game. And so it's about so much more than a positive beta. It's about everything. And to be able to ride it out, to be able to focus on things like, wow, I didn't know that this person could support me. You know, I never checked on them for that before. I never had a reason to. Wow, what a beautiful thing to come out of this, right? And be able to find the other things going on in life instead of becoming so locked into one perspective, because then you lose sight of everything that's around you because your becomes so narrow.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. And you know what's interesting is it's a very hard thing to teach. It's like people just have to arrive at that conclusion.
SPEAKER_00I think a lot of the time hit a rock bottom and want to make a make a change to realize like I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. I don't want to live like this anymore.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Right. It's not the easy times in life that we're gonna go out of our comfort zone. We're not gonna make a change in the easy times. Right. Like life is right, it's expansion and contraction, expansion and contraction. And in expansion state, we're not making a change. We're riding the way we're enjoying it, we should. But in contraction, that's when what are you working doing? Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Well, I think about it from my book agent's perspective. And I'm like, she went through her infertility journey, had you know, not a straightforward journey, had failed cycles, ended up after we had that fateful first meeting saying, Okay, my transfer failed. Like a week later, is it weird if I'm doing this with you and being your patient? And I was like, my whole life's weird. Like, let's let's go for it. And so I'm like doing her monitoring appointments, and she's like, How many chapters have you? And I'm like, oh my God, this is we need to focus on your ovaries. But, you know, she went through this really tough personal journey, and that's what led her down this path of finding me and then giving me this wonderful golden opportunity and being the vehicle to help make this happen. And I think about how beautiful that is. Like, she ended up with her happy ending, and I'm so happy for her that it all worked out, but also like something really beautiful came out of that very painful experience. And so I think like that was another really great life lesson for me that I can apply to all areas of life that you may face adversity and challenging times, but you don't know what other doors that may open up for you. And I know that sounds like a cliche, but it's true, and this was a real example of that.
SPEAKER_02You know, in life, we often see things as they are, but when we actually, you know, zoom out down the road, we can actually understand the Yeah, and and maybe not at the time not be happy with what we're going through, but having faith that it's all there for some lesson for some purpose. Like my teacher always said, You either you either win or you learn. It's not a loss.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_02I love that. Opportunity to learn. I love also that okay, my mention the book. And also the fact the fact that there's so much personalization, what I really liked is that you gave us case studies. I'm a big fan of that because I'm sure people to some degree can relate to a certain number of those case studies and then kind of say, okay, what happened to this patient? What can I do? What are some opportunities? And then on top of that, you shared your personal story.
SPEAKER_01Yes. Yes.
SPEAKER_02Which, you know, I know Rena and I have openly shared our journey, but the fact that you were very open with it too, I think people will really be able to relate to that as well.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. And I think everyone's journey is interesting and and individual, but for me, I think it was really about being proactive and taking the lessons that I was seeing in my day to day job. And Applying them to my own life. Like, full disclosure, as a medical student, before I even met my husband and was just single, I used to tell all my friends, I'm not having kids till I'm in my 40s. Like I already know, I've got this figured out. I'm gonna be a career woman. Like, I have a lot of things to accomplish. Then I met Bobby, and you know, I was like, listen, all are good. Yeah, no, no, no. Actually, I was like, I'm not trying to have kids anytime soon. He's an entrepreneur, he was starting his company. That was kind of music to his ears. But I honestly wasn't saying it because I thought that's what he wanted to hear. It was like we were so on the same page about it. And I was like, listen, I have like four years of residency, three years of fellowship, and like then I want to live my life and travel. And he was like, okay, like whatever. And I said, we'll probably have to free some embryos, but like whatever, we'll do it. And as I got into fellowship training, I was like, you know, there's a lot of things that I thought you could fully, fully control, but you can't always control how things happen. And I found myself, like at that point, I had been married a few years, and I was like, what are we doing? Like I kind of got spooked a little bit and had this skewed perspective that for sure I'm gonna struggle and it's gonna be tough. And so one day I just randomly came home. This was like shortly after we bought a one-bedroom apartment. I'm like, I think I need to get off the pill. I think it's time that we just move up our timeline because inevitably, like, I'm seeing so many people struggling. I'm probably gonna struggle, and then this might be a longer road. And he was like, okay. He's like, but you know, we just bought this one bedroom, and I'm like, I know, we'll figure it out. It probably won't happen right away. It happened pretty quickly. It's like, great, this is wonderful. But I actually, in that time period, I had done some tests and I had realized my AMH was a little bit on the lower side, and I was like, you know what? I kind of wish that I had frozen the embryos beforehand because then I went through pregnancy, I had some very minor issues, but they were very anxiety-provoking to me. And also I did not find it easy to go back to work after, you know, seven weeks after having a C-section. I was like, wow, this is really challenging. I don't think I can do this for like another three years. And I know now that I'm very passionate about wanting to have at least two kids. Like, this is important to me. So, right after I finished breastfeeding, we froze embryos, and that was the process that I was kind of surprised how I reacted. I mean, I had a cycle where I didn't respond, got canceled. I had a cycle where I only had two eggs retrieved, nothing turned into embryos. So I wasn't technically someone with infertility, but I felt really ashamed. I felt really sad. I felt stupid for feeling sad because as a fertility doctor, I know that like I don't have an infertility diagnosis, and me having a low AMH doesn't mean I have infertility, and I'm just doing this preventatively. So why am I so upset at my body for not doing what I need it to do? It was such an eye-opening experience that I draw on till today when I call patients to say, hey, you know, your response isn't great, or we only got this many eggs. I think about it all the time because if I could feel blindsided by how disappointed and the shame I felt, the embarrassment I felt, I was actually embarrassed. I was like, I can't believe I have this like poor response. Like, what is everyone thinking of me? Like these really irrational thoughts that I couldn't intellectualize. And so that helped me, I think, become a better doctor. And ultimately, I did end up having secondary infertility. I was older, and what I thought might happen happened, but luckily I had planned for it, and then I ended up relying on one of my embryos to have my youngest, Gemma. So, and then that turned into a whole thing because then I was pregnant during the worst part of 2020. But there's no contest of like who's suffering more. Every journey is unique, and I think I was upset at myself for feeling the way I felt because I felt like, who am I? How dare I feel upset or disappointed? I have a baby, like all these things that now I talk about online. Like, people don't realize that having secondary infertility is probably one of the loneliest infertility diagnoses because so many women feel like they shouldn't be allowed to feel upset about it. They should just be happy that they have one child. That's the narrative. And I've even posted about it and I've seen comments to that effect that just reaffirm the need to talk about this more. But all these like little themes came up in my own personal journey. And even if they were on like a small scale, I was like, wow, this is opening my mind to a side of things that I just never had that patient perspective before.
SPEAKER_00Well, isn't that interesting too, right? And I I think that's why you're such a great physician because a lot of our learning, you know, med school, you know, whatever school you're in, yes, you have to learn the technicalities. You have to go through the the education, the book smarts, all of that. But then there's the layer of just humanness. And when you can connect on that level, that's what I think makes a good doctor a great doctor.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. But I think some of it is your life experience. And I don't think that means that you can only be good at your job if you've experienced it on the side of the patient. But I do think it gives you a level of empathy. It kind of speeds up or accelerates that process of learning to be compassionate and empathetic on a different level.
SPEAKER_00It's those two. It's not that you have to have the same experience, but it's whatever your experiences are. So often we emotionally gaslight people, right? That, oh, it's gonna be fine. Oh, you're fine, you shouldn't feel that way. And it's having the empathy, having the compassion that I don't know what it feels like to be you, right? And you're sitting here, you're upset, you're stressed, you're anxious, and that's how you feel. I can't tell you how to feel. And to just have that empathy and compassion, that wow, that that is really uncomfortable to feel like that, right?
SPEAKER_01I think women are told how to feel a lot in the field of medicine, and that's what's kind of gotten us to this place where it can take eight to ten years to get a diagnosis for endometriosis or a clear diagnosis for a lot of major gynecologic issues. I think that women have been told for a long time that pain is just part of being a woman, you know, and this is just like the burden of being a woman, and if your periods are problematic, like it is what it is. And I think it's changing, but it's changing too slowly. And I think exactly everything that you said, I agree with. Like, women are gaslit and told to feel certain ways. And I think when it comes to fertility, there's like no shortage of unsolicited advice and feedback. I mean, any comment section of any post, especially the one I was talking about with the secondary infertility, it was kind of flabbergassing. I'm like, this is why this post needs to exist, because there's so much insensitivity and there's a lot of comparison, right? Of like, your struggle's not as worthwhile as my struggle. And it's so sad to see that because I feel like there's so much good to social media and not even just social media, but support groups, like group therapy, spaces where people congregate and you know are vulnerable about their journey and feel less alone in their struggle because they're seeing and hearing from other people. But I think that there's also some negativity that can come out of it when we're stuck in our own journey and don't want to look at things from another person's perspective. And I think there's just so much pain. And from that pain comes a lot of like comparison, searching for answers. And I think it's important for us to talk about because we really need to not just show up for ourselves and find ways to boost our own mental health, but we have to be compassionate and helping each other. And I don't think that that narrative helps when we kind of compare pain and say, like, your pain's less valid than mine. And that does happen a lot in the infertility community online.
SPEAKER_00Well, I want to bring that full circle almost to how we were talking before we started recording with it. I think that women are so quick to explain themselves away, right? You log on, you're beautiful. The first thing you say is, oh gosh, my hair is terrible, I'm so embarrassed, I look horrible, I've been here since seven, right? And what I'm like, how can you change that narrative to I've been here since seven, I'm a boss, I'm sitting here looking gorgeous. Like, why do you sort of make an excuse for yourself? You know, and I think women are so quick on ourselves for themselves, right? And we need to support each other, lift each other up, and be able to just be enough.
SPEAKER_01I agree. I mean, like, I think about it when I'm doing morning monitoring scans, and you're seeing little snapshots of everyone in their journey, and everyone that comes to morning monitoring who's like going through this rigorous journey deserves a medal, you know. Like, I think one thing that's so nice about our building down here in Soho is like they go through these seasons of like providing free coffee and like breakfast for people downstairs. And I wish I could do something nice for everyone that comes in because I think it's easy to get caught up in a vicious cycle of like, I need to accomplish this. Like, what can my body do for me? And pushing yourself and just like constantly evaluating yourself from a critical lens. But at the end of the day, like we're all doing great, and you're absolutely right.
SPEAKER_02And you're doing so much for them. You're showing up with a smile, with support, with lots of care and empathy.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, yeah. But we're all doing our best, and like it's a nice reminder. Like, I'm glad our call started that way because it is a good reminder. It's very easy to slip back into old patterns, and I think it's very easy to be hard on yourself versus being kind and appreciative and just giving yourself a pat on the back. Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_00Totally. So thank you so much for coming on. This was just a very brief snapshot of your story, your book, your journey. And this is this is just the beginning, you know. This is just for today. What I was thinking about, I was sort of spacing out, like imagining this. Imagine a world where you could almost see, right, these sort of like words, you know, above people in front of them that was this like running dialogue of what someone is going through, right? Like you're in the street and you see someone, and it's like you see then this list of yeah, they're actually dealing with. Imagine what kind of world that would be, how much more kinder, compassionate we might be to really know what someone is going through, and it's not about what they present on the outside.
SPEAKER_01For sure. I think it's a good way to think to make sure that we're always drawing on our compassion for other people. You know, because I think the world can be a very harsh place. And when you layer on top of that a serious life challenge, whether it be infertility or anything else, like that is part of life. We're always gonna face challenges, but it's how you react to them, how you talk to yourself through them and coach yourself and get yourself through them. And again, not to sound like a broken record, but I really do think my focus personally, as I've gone through challenges and even the challenge of writing this book, which was a huge project, is to enjoy the journey and focus on the journey and not so much the destination. And that would be my biggest advice to anyone going through any major struggle, including infertility. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02We're so proud of you. Congratulations. And enjoy it. You don't need to think about what's next. Favor this really exciting time in your life.
SPEAKER_01I really appreciate it. And I really mean it when I say thank you for all of the inspiration. And I've learned so much from both of you, and a lot of those teachings are in this book. It's really the culmination of everything I've learned along the way, and you guys are part of that journey.
SPEAKER_00Well, thank you so much for putting the time into it and putting it out there because we need more of this. So we are so proud of you and celebrating this today. We're not gonna think about what's next. It's just this is it. We're on the ride. I love that. Well, till next time, ladies. Yes. Oh, the way we like to end though is Oh yes, how can I forget this?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I forgot. Something we're grateful for. I am grateful for things just aligning and working out the way they're supposed to. And like that, not just being a cliche, but me actually realizing that in a practical real life situation and just feeling like, wow, if this isn't the antidote to cynicism, which is like something that naturally builds, I think, as you adult and get older in life. But this was just such a magical thing that happened in my life. It reminds me that the universe works in mysterious ways and you just never know what's around the corner, and you just have to be open for the opportunities that are meant for you. Love that. Very beautiful.
SPEAKER_00What about you, Dana?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I'll pick back on that. The unfolding of life, the beauty of how things unfold, whether it's how we want it to be or how it is, it's all perfect. And it's a great reminder. You know, I'm grateful to, you know, if I'm caught up in a tough moment to recognize that I I'm zooming in on life as opposed to zooming out and realizing that it's all going to be okay. What about you, Rena?
SPEAKER_00I'm grateful for never giving up and staying on the ride. And, you know, when I look back at my life, right, my struggle with infertility led me to my career, which led me to Dara, who introduced me to Kabbalah, which has really changed my life, which has, you know, in my career has led me to having this podcast with amazing women like Lucky and being able to be exposed to such amazing, passionate people that are just really working to put good energy, good vibrations out in the world. And when I was going through infertility, I did not have this practice. I did not have any of this, and I couldn't see it like this, right? But got me here, right? Because I never gave up. And sometimes we just have to keep going, and here we are. And I wouldn't want to be anywhere else. And that for me is such a gift in my life to be able to say that. So that's beautiful. Thank you so much for coming on, and we are so excited to keep on the ride of life with you.
SPEAKER_01Amazing. Thanks so much, guys.
SPEAKER_02Thank you so much for listening today. And always remember practice gratitude, give a little love to someone else and yourself, and remember you are not alone. Find us on Instagram at fertility underscore forward. And if you're looking for more support, visit us at www.rmany.com and tune in next week for more fertility forward.