We’re recording from Okayama, Japan, and the shift you’re about to hear is bigger than language. Professor Kanako Masui of Nihon Fukushi University joins us to explain why so many domestic violence and child protection systems get stuck asking the wrong questions and how the Safe & Together Model helps professionals see what’s been in front of them all along.

Kanako shares her journey as both a former practitioner and a researcher who has interviewed domestic violence survivors, including adults who grew up with domestic abuse in childhood. That experience led her to a hard truth: when we focus on “why she didn’t leave” or “why she didn’t protect the kids,” we blur accountability and miss the survivor’s real, often invisible protective efforts. We dig into how a perpetrator’s pattern of behaviours as a parent drives harm to children, how to document those choices clearly, and how to work with survivors with dignity and respect while keeping child safety at the center.

We also talk about what implementation looks like on the ground in Japan, from cross-agency collaboration with Child Guidance Centers and Women’s Support Centers to large seminars reaching hundreds of practitioners, plus the intensive work of translating the Safe & Together material and David's book into Japanese so teams can share a common model and common language. Kanako closes with a message to helpers who feel isolated and a direct message to survivors: you are not to be blamed.

If you want practical, domestic abuse and trauma-informed ways to improve domestic violence intervention, child welfare decision-making, and perpetrator accountability, listen now. Subscribe, share this with a colleague, and leave a review telling us what language you want to change first.

Send us Fan Mail

Check out David Mandel's new book Stop Blaming Mothers and Ignoring Fathers: How to Transform the Way We Keep Children Safe from Domestic Violence.

Visit the Safe & Together Institute website.

Start taking Safe & Together Institute courses.

Check out Safe & Together Institute upcoming events.