WEBVTT 00:00:01.040 --> 00:00:03.359 I felt like I was in a wrestling match and losing. 00:00:05.679 --> 00:00:08.240 Maybe just enough so I don't knock them over. 00:00:09.839 --> 00:00:15.919 Turn with me in your Bible to Psalm 34, the scripture reading this morning. 00:00:16.879 --> 00:00:19.679 Psalm 34, verses 1 through 8. 00:00:19.920 --> 00:00:25.440 And I'd encourage you to read along as I read this passage. 00:00:27.039 --> 00:00:28.160 Psalm 34. 00:00:28.239 --> 00:00:33.840 And if you need a Bible, there should be one located there right in front of you, and I'd encourage you to turn there. 00:00:34.159 --> 00:00:37.679 You can find the scripture passage on page 463. 00:00:42.320 --> 00:00:46.880 And if you don't own a Bible, please at the end of the service, take that Bible home with you. 00:00:48.320 --> 00:00:53.200 We love to give away Bibles, and we would love for you to have that, so we encourage you to do that. 00:00:53.600 --> 00:00:58.079 Take that home with you at the close of our service this morning. 00:00:58.479 --> 00:01:02.880 Join me as I read Psalm 34, verses 1 through 8. 00:01:04.480 --> 00:01:07.040 I will bless the Lord at all times. 00:01:07.280 --> 00:01:10.480 His praise shall continually be in my mouth. 00:01:10.799 --> 00:01:13.599 My soul makes its boast in the Lord. 00:01:13.840 --> 00:01:16.319 Let the humble hear and be glad. 00:01:16.640 --> 00:01:22.719 O magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt his name together. 00:01:23.200 --> 00:01:28.480 I sought the Lord and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears. 00:01:29.439 --> 00:01:36.159 Those who look to him are radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed. 00:01:37.200 --> 00:01:43.280 This poor man cried, and the Lord heard him and saved him out of all his troubles. 00:01:44.480 --> 00:01:49.280 The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him and delivers them. 00:01:50.239 --> 00:01:53.200 O taste and see that the Lord is good. 00:01:53.680 --> 00:01:57.040 Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him. 00:01:58.480 --> 00:02:04.239 This morning we're going to talk about a topic of shame and honor. 00:02:04.879 --> 00:02:18.080 And notice what the psalmist writes here in verse 5 of chapter 34 Those who look to him are radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed. 00:02:18.960 --> 00:02:35.520 And I trust this morning as we study the gospel together, that we can see how the gospel addresses not only the guilt of our sin, but also the shame in our lives, both shame that we do and shame that has been caused to us. 00:02:35.840 --> 00:02:38.560 Would you join me as I pray for us again this morning? 00:02:38.800 --> 00:02:51.039 Father, as we are wrestling with an issue that affects at some level each one of us, that we have been shamed. 00:02:51.439 --> 00:03:11.759 Maybe by people who we have associated with that were not respected or in disrepute, maybe because of something somebody did to us that we have no control over and we're the victim of, and yet we feel the shame of that event or those events. 00:03:11.919 --> 00:03:18.080 Maybe it was something that we did or something about us that we feel deficient. 00:03:18.240 --> 00:03:30.319 But Lord, uh, we live in this fallen world and we experience the consequences of that, both in our own actions as well, as what happens to us. 00:03:30.639 --> 00:03:39.520 May we look to you and to the gospel to the cross to see how Christ bore our shame. 00:03:39.680 --> 00:03:40.960 We pray in Christ's name. 00:03:41.360 --> 00:03:41.919 Amen. 00:03:43.840 --> 00:03:45.280 What do you hide? 00:03:46.400 --> 00:03:53.840 What is it in your life that if others found out would cause you to want to run and hide? 00:03:55.599 --> 00:04:00.000 We all have things in our lives that we would be ashamed of if others found out. 00:04:00.639 --> 00:04:13.039 But there are some things about us, or things that have been done to us, or things that have happened to us, or things that are different about us that bring a profound sense of shame. 00:04:14.639 --> 00:04:24.959 Even as I say these words, your mind is going somewhere to something, to that thing that brings you shame. 00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:28.319 Perhaps it is something sexual. 00:04:28.800 --> 00:04:34.319 For others, it was that poor choice that you made that you live with the weight of that regret. 00:04:34.639 --> 00:04:40.639 Maybe you were the victim of abuse, and the shame of being dehumanized lingers. 00:04:41.680 --> 00:05:00.160 Maybe you had an abortion, and particularly in a day like today, when we recognize the sanctity of human life, that all life is precious and sacred and a gift from God, the weight of that decision crushes your heart. 00:05:00.560 --> 00:05:03.600 You never mention it and hope no one ever finds out. 00:05:03.759 --> 00:05:05.199 No one can find out. 00:05:05.360 --> 00:05:06.639 No one can know. 00:05:06.879 --> 00:05:09.360 I can't tell anyone my secret. 00:05:09.680 --> 00:05:10.959 I must hide. 00:05:12.319 --> 00:05:25.519 This morning I want to answer five questions about shame and share how God brings healing in life and even in my own life in this area. 00:05:25.759 --> 00:05:28.800 And so I want to address five questions. 00:05:28.959 --> 00:05:31.360 Not all of the questions will be of the same length. 00:05:31.519 --> 00:05:35.360 The first will be the longest of the five. 00:05:35.920 --> 00:05:41.040 But the first question I want to answer is what is shame? 00:05:42.000 --> 00:05:43.439 What is shame? 00:05:45.680 --> 00:05:50.319 Author Edward Welch in his book Shame Interrupted writes this. 00:05:51.279 --> 00:05:52.319 What is shame? 00:05:52.560 --> 00:06:02.879 Shame is the deep sense that you are unacceptable because of something you did, something done to you, or something associated with you. 00:06:03.279 --> 00:06:06.000 You feel exposed or humiliated. 00:06:06.480 --> 00:06:11.759 Or to strengthen the language, you are disgraced because you acted less than human. 00:06:12.000 --> 00:06:21.040 You were treated as if you were less than human, or you were associated with something less than human, and there are witnesses. 00:06:21.920 --> 00:06:30.079 Most of what I am going to share today is gleaned from this book, Ed Welch's Shame Interrupted. 00:06:30.399 --> 00:06:45.680 There are very few original, if any original ideas in here with me, and so I do want to make that note up front in case I don't uh give a quote at all times, but uh the book's name is Shame Interrupted by Edward T. 00:06:45.839 --> 00:06:46.399 Welch. 00:06:46.720 --> 00:06:50.879 Welch explains the shame and the disgust of shame. 00:06:51.120 --> 00:06:55.279 This is what he writes: shame connects three human experiences. 00:06:56.000 --> 00:06:58.160 You feel like an outcast. 00:06:58.480 --> 00:06:59.920 You don't belong. 00:07:01.199 --> 00:07:02.800 You feel naked. 00:07:03.439 --> 00:07:08.480 While everyone else is walking around with their clothes on, you feel exposed and vulnerable. 00:07:08.720 --> 00:07:12.240 You are seen, and what others see is not pretty. 00:07:13.120 --> 00:07:15.040 You feel unclean. 00:07:15.519 --> 00:07:17.360 Something is wrong with you. 00:07:17.600 --> 00:07:18.879 You are dirty. 00:07:19.120 --> 00:07:21.839 Even worse, you are contaminated. 00:07:22.480 --> 00:07:28.800 There's a difference between being a bit muddy and harboring a deadly contagious virus. 00:07:29.839 --> 00:07:40.720 There's a difference between guilt and shame, and oftentimes we confuse the two, even when we're looking at our own hearts and trying to understand why we feel the way we do. 00:07:41.120 --> 00:07:45.519 Guilt can be hidden, but shame feels like it's always exposed. 00:07:46.079 --> 00:07:48.800 Guilt is about what you have done. 00:07:49.600 --> 00:07:51.839 Shame is about who you are. 00:07:53.279 --> 00:07:56.319 Even as little kids, we understand the idea of shame. 00:07:56.639 --> 00:07:59.199 We say things like, oh, that's gross. 00:07:59.920 --> 00:08:03.360 Or kids say, Well, that's yucky or ick. 00:08:04.639 --> 00:08:07.920 And they run away as if they're going to be contaminated. 00:08:09.199 --> 00:08:14.319 Shame says you are not acceptable, you are a mistake. 00:08:15.920 --> 00:08:25.439 The judge may say not guilty and take away the penalty of your guilt, but you still feel like scum. 00:08:25.600 --> 00:08:28.560 And the verdict doesn't bring much hope. 00:08:29.920 --> 00:08:34.399 We don't recognize it often, but the Bible has much to say about shame. 00:08:34.559 --> 00:08:42.480 In fact, throughout the entire Old Testament and New Testament, the Bible over and over again deals with the issue of shame. 00:08:42.879 --> 00:08:50.080 The outcast, the leper, the unclean, the slave, they all live with shame. 00:08:51.440 --> 00:08:56.159 Shame comes into our lives in a variety of different ways, and I've already alluded to that. 00:08:56.240 --> 00:08:59.759 And let me paraphrase some of the things that Welch notes in his book. 00:08:59.919 --> 00:09:03.440 He says, shame can come into our lives through something we do. 00:09:04.320 --> 00:09:06.480 Addicts live with shame. 00:09:07.440 --> 00:09:09.840 Sexual sin leads to shame. 00:09:10.159 --> 00:09:16.080 Anything that you do that is seen as scandalous brings shame. 00:09:17.360 --> 00:09:25.039 But not only can shame come into our lives through something we do, shame can come into our lives through something that someone did to us. 00:09:26.080 --> 00:09:30.480 Women and children who are sexually violated feel a deep sense of shame. 00:09:30.720 --> 00:09:33.200 They were treated as less than human. 00:09:34.639 --> 00:09:45.039 A wife that is abandoned by her husband after he's had an affair feels the shame of it even though she did not commit the sin. 00:09:46.639 --> 00:09:50.799 Shame can also come from being different from others. 00:09:51.279 --> 00:10:00.240 If you're a racial minority and you're one of few, often that one will feel the shame of being different from all of those around him. 00:10:01.519 --> 00:10:07.840 Those with a physical handicap often feel the shame of not being whole. 00:10:08.480 --> 00:10:19.200 People who struggle with being overweight feel the shame about their bodies as they look around and hear the constant messages of how they should look. 00:10:20.480 --> 00:10:24.159 But we can also feel shame sometimes through our associations. 00:10:25.519 --> 00:10:28.879 Your group of friends are the losers on campus. 00:10:30.159 --> 00:10:42.000 Maybe you lived on the wrong side of the tracks, and the people in your neighborhood were looked down upon by those of a better class, of a better neighborhood. 00:10:43.200 --> 00:10:45.600 Maybe your father went to prison. 00:10:46.159 --> 00:10:51.840 And you live with the shame of not wanting anyone ever to find out what happened in your family. 00:10:53.440 --> 00:11:00.080 Maybe a brother or sister committed suicide, and it's the secret that your family hides. 00:11:03.679 --> 00:11:06.799 What are some of the words that describe shame? 00:11:06.960 --> 00:11:09.120 What are some of the words that we use? 00:11:12.879 --> 00:11:34.559 Inferior, alienated, embarrassed, ridiculed, weak, powerless, a failure, different, insulted, rejected, inadequate, humiliated, ignored, loser. 00:11:35.440 --> 00:11:37.759 But really those words aren't strong enough. 00:11:37.840 --> 00:11:44.320 There's a whole level of words that really describe the heart of what shame feels like. 00:11:45.519 --> 00:12:14.000 Unclean, dishonored, filthy, shunned, disgusting, defiled, outcast, unlovable, discarded, repulsive, disgraced, worthless, loathed, scorned, vile. 00:12:15.200 --> 00:12:18.480 There's a difference between embarrassment and shame. 00:12:18.720 --> 00:12:24.000 Embarrassment is for a moment, but you don't carry the scars with you for life. 00:12:25.360 --> 00:12:31.200 With embarrassment, you can laugh, at least eventually, you can laugh along with others. 00:12:32.320 --> 00:12:38.559 What causes you embarrassment has been felt by everyone else at some time in some way. 00:12:39.600 --> 00:12:42.000 But shame afflicts your soul. 00:12:42.480 --> 00:12:44.799 Shame becomes your identity. 00:12:46.159 --> 00:12:48.399 You never laugh at shame. 00:12:49.039 --> 00:12:51.120 You never get over shame. 00:12:53.120 --> 00:12:57.120 We see shame in the opening pages of the Bible in the book of Genesis. 00:12:57.279 --> 00:13:03.519 In Genesis 2.25, it says, And the man and his wife were both naked and they were unashamed. 00:13:04.960 --> 00:13:09.200 But you turn over to the next chapter, and what do we find? 00:13:10.080 --> 00:13:15.759 After they had sinned, their eyes were opened, and they knew that they were naked. 00:13:16.159 --> 00:13:18.879 The Bible says that they hid themselves. 00:13:19.200 --> 00:13:27.039 We see that they tried to cover up their shame by making clothes out of fig leaves, and fear replaced fellowship. 00:13:27.600 --> 00:13:34.399 Genesis chapter 3, verses 9 and 10 says, The Lord God called to the man and said to him, Where are you? 00:13:35.279 --> 00:13:43.600 And he said, I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked and I hid myself. 00:13:46.080 --> 00:13:48.720 Is there ever legitimate shame and guilt? 00:13:48.960 --> 00:13:50.240 I believe there are. 00:13:51.279 --> 00:13:55.679 When we do something sinful and wrong, we ought to have a sense of guilt. 00:13:55.840 --> 00:14:01.120 And in that instance, guilt is a good thing in that it drives us to the cross. 00:14:02.000 --> 00:14:05.840 Similarly, when we sin, we recognize that we have dishonored God. 00:14:05.919 --> 00:14:11.679 So there's an appropriate sense of shame so that we respond in repentance and faith. 00:14:12.960 --> 00:14:14.879 But here's the key. 00:14:15.120 --> 00:14:16.320 Here's the problem. 00:14:17.679 --> 00:14:27.440 Even though we can know that we're forgiven, we oftentimes still carry the weight of that shame in our lives for years. 00:14:29.360 --> 00:14:43.600 And oftentimes we feel shame for things that others have done to us or things we are associated with or things that are different about us that have nothing to do with anything that we have done or any sins we've committed. 00:14:45.360 --> 00:14:55.519 Well, there's a second question I want to answer, and this one will be brief, and there's much more that could be said about this, but how do we falsely deal with shame? 00:14:55.679 --> 00:15:00.000 What are some of the things we try to do to remedy shame in our lives? 00:15:01.679 --> 00:15:14.879 Well, oftentimes we try to give ourselves pep talks and have positive thinking or to talk ourselves out of it and just keep telling ourselves over and over again it doesn't matter, it doesn't make a difference, we're okay. 00:15:15.120 --> 00:15:19.200 Just think on the good side of life, don't focus on those things. 00:15:19.759 --> 00:15:24.000 But it doesn't erase the pain of the shame that you feel. 00:15:25.600 --> 00:15:29.759 Sometimes we mistake shame with the feeling of guilt. 00:15:30.639 --> 00:15:48.320 And we feel the weight of the what we think is guilt, and we confess our sins over and over and over again, thinking that by doing this that it will remove these feelings, but we don't recognize that what we're experiencing isn't the guilt of our sin that Christ has forgiven. 00:15:48.399 --> 00:15:51.840 It is the shame that we falsely carry with us. 00:15:54.000 --> 00:16:00.080 Sometimes we deal with shame by turning against ourselves in self-punishment. 00:16:00.720 --> 00:16:09.039 Often shame is behind anorexia and bulimia and reckless behavior or cutting. 00:16:10.000 --> 00:16:21.840 And underneath those actions and those behaviors, those dangerous choices, is somebody who is trying to deal with shame in his or her life. 00:16:23.279 --> 00:16:30.080 Others self-medicate through drugs or alcohol or activities or relationships. 00:16:30.720 --> 00:16:36.399 Others try to dull the pain or mask the pain or drown the pain out. 00:16:38.639 --> 00:16:49.759 Some try to find another person who will make them feel better, who will fill this hole, who will soothe this ache in his or her heart. 00:16:51.440 --> 00:17:06.079 And sometimes it's through the busyness of activities or what are often called addictions, but behind those are addictions, are an attempt to self-medicate, to deal with the shame in a person's life. 00:17:06.799 --> 00:17:11.759 There's a lot of ways that we falsely deal with shame in our lives. 00:17:13.680 --> 00:17:16.480 But there's a third question I want to answer. 00:17:17.599 --> 00:17:24.240 And that question was how does Jesus deal with the issue of shame in the lives of others in the Bible? 00:17:24.480 --> 00:17:27.680 How does Jesus approach shame? 00:17:30.319 --> 00:17:45.759 In fact, if we look through the ministry of Jesus and we begin to think through the lens of shame, we see over and over again that Jesus is addressing not only the guilt of sin, but the shame that people carry with them. 00:17:46.400 --> 00:17:48.720 Let me just share a few encounters. 00:17:48.799 --> 00:17:50.640 We won't look at them in detail. 00:17:50.880 --> 00:17:59.680 But for instance, in Luke chapter 5, verses 12 through 16, you remember the story, there's a leper who is coming to Jesus. 00:17:59.839 --> 00:18:12.400 He's crying out to Jesus, and you know that the leper is one who has been rejected by society, not because of anything that he has done, but because of the reality that was in his life. 00:18:12.880 --> 00:18:14.480 He is unclean. 00:18:15.279 --> 00:18:21.119 And because of that, he's put to public shame and rejected being put outside the camp. 00:18:21.599 --> 00:18:28.559 Nobody talks to him, nobody associates with him, nobody treats him as fully human. 00:18:28.880 --> 00:18:29.839 He is other. 00:18:31.119 --> 00:18:32.559 He is less than. 00:18:33.039 --> 00:18:39.839 And the only people that will associate with him are the others who are less than human, the other lepers. 00:18:41.359 --> 00:18:44.160 He is garbage, a waste. 00:18:44.960 --> 00:18:48.640 But he cries out to Jesus and Jesus touches him. 00:18:49.839 --> 00:18:51.759 Think about that for a moment. 00:18:52.000 --> 00:19:02.319 Here is this man for perhaps years or decades or maybe most of his life that no one who wasn't unclean would come into contact with him. 00:19:02.640 --> 00:19:14.079 And now here is the Son of God who reaches out and touches him and heals him and restores him. 00:19:15.599 --> 00:19:17.039 That was a public shame. 00:19:17.200 --> 00:19:19.599 There was nothing that this man could do to hide it. 00:19:20.000 --> 00:19:23.599 But there were some that could at times hide their shame. 00:19:23.680 --> 00:19:33.279 And think of the woman in Luke chapter 8, verses 42 through 48, who had an issue of bleeding for 12 years. 00:19:34.400 --> 00:19:40.000 She was ceremonially unclean because of this issue of blood. 00:19:41.279 --> 00:19:44.000 Because of this ongoing problem. 00:19:45.599 --> 00:19:47.759 She couldn't come in contact with people. 00:19:47.920 --> 00:19:53.359 Her family would have known perhaps if she was married, her husband would have distanced himself from her. 00:19:53.599 --> 00:20:01.519 She would have had those who were closest to her who knew about it, who would have been the ones to avoid her. 00:20:02.799 --> 00:20:06.960 And she could have gone out into the community, but she only had one of two choices. 00:20:07.200 --> 00:20:28.079 Either she hid the reality of her uncleanness and isolated herself from others if she was going to be obedient so that she didn't bring other people into contact with her, or else she would have to lie and pretend that everything was okay. 00:20:31.039 --> 00:20:33.279 She didn't have too many choices. 00:20:33.440 --> 00:20:36.240 But she does in this passage, the unthinkable. 00:20:36.400 --> 00:20:42.079 She comes up to Jesus in the midst of this crowd and touches the hem of his garments. 00:20:42.799 --> 00:20:47.839 It's fascinating what Jesus does here because he asks the question, who touched me? 00:20:49.039 --> 00:20:52.880 And the disciples they say, Lord, how can you ask who touched you? 00:20:53.039 --> 00:20:55.039 There are people crowding in all around you. 00:20:55.200 --> 00:20:56.880 There are so many people touching you. 00:20:57.039 --> 00:20:58.640 How can you ask this? 00:21:01.519 --> 00:21:08.000 And Jesus turns and publicly exposes this woman. 00:21:09.200 --> 00:21:11.039 But not to shame her. 00:21:13.279 --> 00:21:15.119 She had been healed. 00:21:16.000 --> 00:21:18.640 The Bible tells us she had been saved. 00:21:19.519 --> 00:21:21.599 She already had faith in Christ. 00:21:21.839 --> 00:21:31.759 But Jesus turns not to shame her, but to honor her and restore her in the eyes of the community. 00:21:32.880 --> 00:21:38.480 He publicly declares that she is clean, not because she needed to know what happened. 00:21:38.720 --> 00:21:43.200 She knew the moment that she touched Jesus what happened. 00:21:44.240 --> 00:21:48.559 But so that everyone else around would know. 00:21:51.200 --> 00:21:55.599 Or think of the woman in John chapter 8 who was caught in the act of adultery. 00:21:55.759 --> 00:21:59.759 The Pharisees wanted to publicly shame her and to use her as a force. 00:22:00.480 --> 00:22:02.400 To try to trap Jesus. 00:22:03.759 --> 00:22:06.240 And they drag her out into the public. 00:22:06.400 --> 00:22:11.440 Perhaps she was clinging on to one of the sheets in the bed to cover herself up. 00:22:11.599 --> 00:22:18.960 Without a shred of dignity, she is paraded to Jesus and thrown in front of him. 00:22:20.559 --> 00:22:21.920 What would he do? 00:22:22.559 --> 00:22:24.400 The sinless Son of God. 00:22:25.519 --> 00:22:26.960 What would he do? 00:22:29.119 --> 00:22:34.400 When you read that story in John chapter 8, you find that he shames the shamers. 00:22:36.160 --> 00:22:38.000 He reminds them of their own sin. 00:22:38.240 --> 00:22:43.680 He says, You who is without sin, cast the first stone. 00:22:44.480 --> 00:22:49.200 And one by one, beginning with the oldest, they all walk away. 00:22:50.559 --> 00:22:53.519 And then it's only Jesus and this woman. 00:22:55.920 --> 00:23:01.680 And he tells her that she's forgiven and he restores her dignity and says, Go and sin no more. 00:23:04.079 --> 00:23:13.680 Or we could recall the woman who washed Jesus' feet with her tears and dried them with her hair. 00:23:16.640 --> 00:23:20.160 And we can think about this story of what happened. 00:23:20.960 --> 00:23:27.039 Jesus was reclining with all of the respectable people at a dinner party that they had invited him to. 00:23:28.880 --> 00:23:34.640 And this woman comes in, already moved by her faith in Jesus. 00:23:34.720 --> 00:23:52.559 She comes in there and she begins to weep at Jesus' feet so that her tears begin to fall at his feet, and the dirt that was on his feet from walking in the dusty, filthy roads begins to wash away in her tears. 00:23:52.720 --> 00:23:56.480 And then she begins to dry his feet with her hair. 00:24:00.240 --> 00:24:04.319 The religious leaders there knew the word to describe this woman. 00:24:06.640 --> 00:24:07.920 The word was whore. 00:24:10.559 --> 00:24:14.079 And they looked at Jesus and said, He must not be a prophet. 00:24:14.240 --> 00:24:19.440 If he was, he would know what kind of woman was touching him. 00:24:20.400 --> 00:24:23.920 And Jesus knew exactly who she was. 00:24:26.400 --> 00:24:39.200 And he tells them that not only is she forgiven, but Jesus uses her as an example of one who loves much because she has been forgiven much. 00:24:42.079 --> 00:24:45.599 And compared to them, they didn't know love at all. 00:24:45.839 --> 00:24:48.400 And they didn't understand the love of God. 00:24:50.079 --> 00:24:54.799 The Bible tells us Jesus not only removes our shame, he brings honor. 00:24:55.920 --> 00:24:58.880 The king left heaven to rescue you. 00:24:59.119 --> 00:25:01.039 That's the message of the Bible. 00:25:01.359 --> 00:25:09.680 He came and when he did, he came on a rescue mission and he had you in mind because he knew you before the foundation of the world. 00:25:10.000 --> 00:25:20.799 He came and he touched you and he cleansed you and he healed you and he forgave you and he gave you his identity as his child. 00:25:21.519 --> 00:25:23.359 He calls you his own. 00:25:23.519 --> 00:25:25.039 You bear his name. 00:25:25.279 --> 00:25:28.480 You are not only forgiven, you are honored. 00:25:28.559 --> 00:25:32.559 And one day he says, You will be glorified. 00:25:37.359 --> 00:25:40.400 There's a fourth question I'd like to answer. 00:25:41.759 --> 00:25:44.640 How does the gospel remove our shame? 00:25:46.559 --> 00:25:48.880 How does the gospel remove our shame? 00:25:49.039 --> 00:25:50.960 This is the fourth question I'd like to address. 00:25:51.200 --> 00:25:53.920 Jesus took our guilt on the cross. 00:25:54.160 --> 00:25:55.599 The Bible tells us that. 00:25:55.839 --> 00:25:57.839 We talked about this two weeks ago. 00:25:58.079 --> 00:26:09.200 The reality that the penalty for my sins was paid for by Christ, and that he took my sin, he took the guilt and the penalty and the punishment for my sin. 00:26:09.359 --> 00:26:12.799 All of the wrath that I deserve was poured out upon him. 00:26:13.119 --> 00:26:17.680 There is not one drop left in that cup that is reserved for me. 00:26:17.920 --> 00:26:33.839 And then the Bible tells us he clothed us with his righteousness, the perfection of his life that he lived in obedience to the Father, and fulfilling everything that we could not fulfill, he did, and then he gave that to us. 00:26:34.559 --> 00:26:37.440 And it was credited to our righteousness. 00:26:38.240 --> 00:26:42.160 But the Bible tells us that Jesus also bore our shame. 00:26:42.559 --> 00:26:59.359 Hebrews chapter 12, verse 2 says this: looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. 00:27:01.200 --> 00:27:25.279 Welch writes this: the Son of God, while on a rescue mission of love, was misunderstood, insulted, betrayed, denied, mocked, spit on, cursed, abandoned, stripped and crucified. 00:27:26.079 --> 00:27:32.079 When we think of what Jesus did, crucifixion was intentionally dehumanizing. 00:27:32.559 --> 00:27:47.440 There was a story I read in the paper this week about an execution, and the reality of it was that as people evaluated it because of the new chemicals that they used, they said this was cruel and inhuman punishment. 00:27:48.799 --> 00:28:03.359 But for the Romans, that was exactly what they wanted to do was to dehumanize the one, to heap shame upon the one after mocking and scourging and beating. 00:28:03.599 --> 00:28:10.319 They paraded Jesus through the streets so that everyone would look on him with scorn. 00:28:10.400 --> 00:28:19.519 And then they hung him on the cross and they hung him naked to be shamed as he died. 00:28:21.039 --> 00:28:31.519 Worst of all, of all of that, worst of all, and more than all of that combined, Jesus was rejected by his father on the cross. 00:28:32.480 --> 00:28:38.079 You know, the only time Jesus doesn't call God his father is on the cross. 00:28:38.480 --> 00:28:44.559 When he cries out, My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? 00:28:46.240 --> 00:28:55.200 Jesus experienced the Father turning his back on him so that we will always be accepted. 00:28:57.599 --> 00:29:03.519 It says that for the joy set before him, Jesus endured the cross, despising the shame. 00:29:03.599 --> 00:29:05.200 What does it mean to despise? 00:29:05.440 --> 00:29:11.759 To despise means to give no mind to, to look down upon, to be unencumbered about. 00:29:12.640 --> 00:29:20.240 And Welch writes, Jesus absorbed the shame of the world and despised it by never being controlled by it. 00:29:20.559 --> 00:29:22.799 Jesus looked down on shame. 00:29:24.559 --> 00:29:26.319 Why did God do this? 00:29:27.359 --> 00:29:32.400 He did it so that he could put us in a favored status as his beloved sons and daughters. 00:29:32.559 --> 00:29:34.640 He identified with our sins. 00:29:36.000 --> 00:29:40.559 He was unclean so that we could be made holy. 00:29:40.799 --> 00:29:49.359 He was naked so that we could be clothed with the righteousness of Christ and we could wear the royal garbs of his children. 00:29:49.599 --> 00:29:52.960 He was punished so that we could be forgiven. 00:29:53.119 --> 00:29:56.240 He was rejected so that we could be accepted. 00:29:56.480 --> 00:29:59.440 He was shamed so that we could be honored. 00:29:59.599 --> 00:30:03.759 He was forsaken so that we could be pursued. 00:30:04.240 --> 00:30:06.960 He was alienated so that we could be reconciled. 00:30:07.119 --> 00:30:12.319 He was an outcast so that we would gain a favored position as his child. 00:30:12.559 --> 00:30:18.480 He was treated as a slave so that we might be royal sons. 00:30:18.720 --> 00:30:23.359 He was made ugly so that we might be made beautiful. 00:30:24.240 --> 00:30:28.319 Psalm 84,11 says, For the Lord God is a son and a shield. 00:30:28.480 --> 00:30:30.960 The Lord bestows favor and honor. 00:30:33.039 --> 00:30:37.279 One final question briefly, and I'll talk more about this next week. 00:30:37.599 --> 00:30:42.000 But how do we appropriate grace at the point of our shame? 00:30:43.680 --> 00:30:54.319 First of all, it begins by looking to the cross of what we've just talked about, of what Jesus did, not only of bearing our guilt, but also our shame, to know that you are forgiven. 00:30:54.559 --> 00:30:56.880 More than forgiven, you are accepted. 00:30:57.119 --> 00:31:07.680 More than accepted, you are honored as his child to be the recipient of his grace, to be an heir according to promise. 00:31:08.079 --> 00:31:10.480 You are his treasured possession. 00:31:11.519 --> 00:31:14.880 Secondly, I would say, come into the light of God's love. 00:31:15.440 --> 00:31:22.319 Find some safe people who understand grace to share your hurt, your pain, and your struggles. 00:31:22.480 --> 00:31:28.240 Begin to allow others to minister God's grace and love to the deepest wounds in your heart. 00:31:29.839 --> 00:31:35.759 And continue to look to Jesus and the gospel to define who you are in Him. 00:31:38.960 --> 00:31:44.880 I don't know what your shame is, but I know well the things I speak of. 00:31:46.480 --> 00:31:48.240 So what about you, Dave? 00:31:48.880 --> 00:31:51.440 What has brought shame in your life? 00:31:53.200 --> 00:32:01.759 I share with fear and trembling, knowing that anything I share could be misunderstood, twisted, or distorted. 00:32:02.319 --> 00:32:09.200 But I do want to honor God by sharing how his grace has touched the deepest shames in my life. 00:32:10.640 --> 00:32:15.200 This isn't a confession of moral failure, so please don't think I'm going there. 00:32:15.759 --> 00:32:17.839 But it is deeply personal. 00:32:19.119 --> 00:32:28.720 I shared a little bit about my relationship with my father last week, so I won't repeat those things here, but that also bears on what I share this morning. 00:32:31.039 --> 00:32:38.000 When I was a child, I had a relative who was very close to me in age, almost identical in age. 00:32:38.880 --> 00:32:47.440 We didn't find out this about him until many years later, in fact, until he was a teenager and had tried to commit suicide. 00:32:48.480 --> 00:32:54.799 But he had been sexually abused by a member of his extended family, an older man. 00:32:56.160 --> 00:33:01.279 I had no contact with that individual because he wasn't in my family. 00:33:03.039 --> 00:33:04.960 So how did that affect me? 00:33:06.400 --> 00:33:11.519 When we were children, this relative would come over often and occasionally sleep over. 00:33:13.039 --> 00:33:17.759 I was maybe five or six years old at the time, I don't recall exactly. 00:33:18.640 --> 00:33:23.200 But during one of those times, he initiated physical contact with me. 00:33:23.920 --> 00:33:27.200 I didn't understand the wrongness of it at the time. 00:33:27.839 --> 00:33:37.279 And honestly, I can't tell you how long that went on, whether it was weeks or months or years, but eventually I put a decisive stop to it. 00:33:39.440 --> 00:33:47.119 However, these events, along with many other dysfunctional situations in my family, had a deep and lasting impact on me. 00:33:48.079 --> 00:33:52.640 My sinful nature reacted in certain ways, responding to them. 00:33:53.119 --> 00:33:55.359 I struggled with depression. 00:33:55.599 --> 00:34:01.039 And I can remember even as a middle school child wondering why life was worth living. 00:34:03.599 --> 00:34:12.079 As I got older and started to go through puberty, I found myself struggling with unwanted same-sex attractions. 00:34:12.800 --> 00:34:18.880 It wasn't something that I wanted or asked for, but these struggles were there nonetheless. 00:34:19.920 --> 00:34:23.199 Around that same time I came to know Christ. 00:34:24.159 --> 00:34:28.559 But coming to Christ did not eradicate these temptations I was facing. 00:34:29.679 --> 00:34:37.519 The church I began attending was very strict, legalistic, and knew very little of love and grace. 00:34:38.239 --> 00:34:45.920 It didn't take me long to realize that there are some issues you don't talk about and some struggles you never share, ever. 00:34:46.960 --> 00:34:57.039 Anytime these issues came up, I sensed a level of contempt and disgust that reminded me very quickly and decisively to stay silent. 00:34:58.639 --> 00:35:06.719 High school was a confusing time, and I began to struggle with alcohol, in part to fit in and in part to self-medicate the pain. 00:35:07.519 --> 00:35:12.000 I walked away from the church, but my Savior never walked away from me. 00:35:12.800 --> 00:35:18.079 By God's grace, I was spared from actively pursuing these desires. 00:35:19.199 --> 00:35:23.440 Two years after high school, God dramatically got a hold of my life. 00:35:23.679 --> 00:35:26.159 My heavenly father wouldn't let me go. 00:35:26.880 --> 00:35:29.280 But I knew I had a decision to make. 00:35:29.840 --> 00:35:34.320 Would I turn to the world and pursue my desires, or would I turn to Christ? 00:35:34.880 --> 00:35:37.039 I knew I couldn't have both. 00:35:37.679 --> 00:35:42.000 The love of my Savior was too compelling for me to do anything else. 00:35:42.880 --> 00:35:49.599 At the Christian college where I attended, I met with two different Christian counselors as well as the campus pastor. 00:35:51.840 --> 00:35:56.079 But deep in my heart lurked the abject shame of this struggle. 00:35:56.320 --> 00:35:59.599 I could never admit to my friends what I was dealing with. 00:35:59.760 --> 00:36:02.320 Even my closest friends didn't know. 00:36:02.880 --> 00:36:09.039 I felt isolated and alone, but I felt I had to remain silent if I was going to be accepted. 00:36:09.840 --> 00:36:14.000 I knew in my heart it would be the only way that anyone would love me. 00:36:15.519 --> 00:36:24.239 A few weeks ago I told you about a friend of mine, Joe, who came to me during college for prayer because of this struggle that he had. 00:36:24.960 --> 00:36:29.760 And I'm ashamed to admit I did the very same thing to him that I feared others would do to me. 00:36:30.000 --> 00:36:33.039 I turned away and distanced myself from him. 00:36:33.760 --> 00:36:39.199 And only in the last few years have I tried to reach out to him to minister and encourage him. 00:36:41.119 --> 00:36:46.880 God has brought deep and significant but not complete healing in this area of my life. 00:36:47.119 --> 00:36:53.360 At some level, it will probably be a struggle I'll have to deal with by God's grace for the rest of my life. 00:36:53.920 --> 00:36:57.440 But God is doing an incredible work in my life through the gospel. 00:36:57.599 --> 00:37:01.679 He's showing me who I am in Christ and the great love that He has for me. 00:37:02.320 --> 00:37:06.960 He is showing me that Jesus has taken my shame and given me honor. 00:37:08.320 --> 00:37:13.840 In God's great goodness, he's brought a beautiful woman into my life that I fell in love with and married. 00:37:14.159 --> 00:37:20.480 And I know that isn't the experience of everyone who struggles with these issues in life, but it was in my life. 00:37:21.360 --> 00:37:34.960 Over the years at faith, I've had the opportunity to share with many close friends as well as the pastoral staff and the elders about these areas of my life for encouragement and prayer and continuous support. 00:37:36.639 --> 00:37:48.880 I don't share these things to draw attention to myself, but to share the power of the gospel to address not only the guilt of our sin, but also our deepest struggles with shame. 00:37:50.480 --> 00:37:52.639 I don't know what your shame is. 00:37:53.280 --> 00:37:57.039 I don't know what you hide from so that you'll be accepted. 00:37:58.960 --> 00:38:04.800 But Jesus is able to deal with the most serious, shameful secrets in your life. 00:38:05.920 --> 00:38:08.079 The gospel gives life. 00:38:09.039 --> 00:38:11.360 The gospel gives forgiveness. 00:38:11.920 --> 00:38:17.199 The gospel redeems and cleanses and restores. 00:38:18.079 --> 00:38:20.079 The gospel transforms. 00:38:21.119 --> 00:38:25.840 The gospel gives you entrance into the extravagant love of the Father. 00:38:27.119 --> 00:38:31.599 In just a moment, we're going to play a song and a video is going to play. 00:38:32.400 --> 00:38:38.400 I don't know where you are in your life or what shame it is that you carry. 00:38:40.000 --> 00:38:46.000 It may be something that I've mentioned over the course of this sermon, it may be something completely different. 00:38:46.239 --> 00:38:56.320 But I'm going to ask the elders to come, and if there is something in your life that you would like prayer for, I'd encourage you while the song is praying to please come forward. 00:38:56.480 --> 00:39:00.800 You may be at a place in your life where you're not even able to talk about it. 00:39:02.719 --> 00:39:06.000 But you can still come and ask for prayer. 00:39:06.719 --> 00:39:15.039 And so while the song is playing, I want to encourage you to listen to the words, to quietly pray if others are coming forward. 00:39:15.199 --> 00:39:20.639 And at the conclusion of the song, if you would quietly leave if others are praying. 00:39:20.960 --> 00:39:26.880 But now, if you would uh join with me as we listen to this song and meditate on the words. 00:39:26.960 --> 00:39:37.440 And if and as the elders come now, if there's something that you need prayer for, I encourage you, please come forward, and we would love to take the opportunity to pray with you.