Dr. Wayne Dyer: Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life; Wisdom of the Tao

Thank you Jeaneen for the recommendation for our first book review this Summer! Both Lydia, my co-host, and I downloaded the audible book and jumped right in. 

Dr. Wayne W. Dyer’s book reveals his understandings and translations of the Tao Te Ching and has created 81 distinct essays on how to apply the ancient wisdom of Lao-tzu to today's modern world.

So much of my developmental work and training for horses and their human partners is based on a lifetime of study and practice of Taoist teachings, specifically Lao-tzu. Both my guest speakers and I are excited to share what we’ve learned in Dr. Dyer’s book as well as share how Lao-tzu and the Great Way are so intricately intertwined in my Tao of Horsemanship teachings, specifically my MasteryMembership Program.

If you're looking for a podcast that will show you a way, a path, to enlightenment, attunement, ease, and balance within and with your horse, this one is it! 

“You have to grow from the inside out. None can teach you, none can make you spiritual. There is no other teacher but your own soul.” - Swami Vivekananda

May you always be one with your horse,
 Caroline

Transcript

Caroline Beste (1m 4s):
You are listening to Everything Horses & More! Podcast with me, your host Caroline Beste. I'm the founder of my Tao of Horsemanship method, a pioneer in horse training and development, and a true advocate of the horse. I bring an intuitive and educated. I, along with an experienced and intelligent perspective to understanding both horse and human nature and behavior, my experience and skill sets are the cornerstone to my worldwide success in training methodology. My experience with horses as intelligent sentianent beings is what inspired me to create my highly acclaimed and proven training method, consensual partnership training for horses and humans.

Caroline Beste (1m 48s):
A model I pioneered in 2008 consensual partnership training provides a comprehensive and impressive curriculum. Teaching horse owners, how to fully develop their horses, using a holistic, empathetic and natural process. My training system teaches you how to achieve true partnership with horses and without the use of pain, excessive pressure, dominance force, or coercion. In addition to being a world-class trainer for both horses and people, I'm an artist, author, entrepreneur, speaker radio show host, licensed working equitation trainer and writing foundation specialist. I offer one of the largest and most comprehensive online educational platforms.

Caroline Beste (2m 28s):
The Dal of horsemanship, where I host a variety of courses produced and personally taught by me and my amazing school masters. In addition to sharing what I know in my in-person training and online courses, I invite special guests and students each month to my radio show everything horses and more podcast. This platform allows us to engage with all of you and share our very personal and transformational journey with horses. I invite you to listen in and hope we find something that helps inspire you to reach your personal goals and with your horse. Thank you. And may you always be one with horses?

Caroline Beste (3m 26s):
Welcome back everybody, to everything, horses and more podcast, you all know who I am, Caroline, best your host. And Lydia is our co-host. And today we have another cohost and I'll say both ladies are guest speakers as well. We have Jeaneen <inaudible> say hello to Jeaneen. You both are not only, well, Lydia is more of a co-host, but you both are my guests today. And I'm going to start out with an intro about our topic in it is this summer, we're doing a book review. This is the first book review for the summer.

Caroline Beste (4m 6s):
And I think what yesterday was the first day of summer. So it's perfect timing the 21st. So our book review today, and Jeaneen's the one that got me started on this. And it's by Dr. Wayne Dyer change your thoughts, change your life. How many of us have heard that by Dr. Dyer? It is like one of the most popular phrases and it's called living the wisdom of the Tao T a O. You can also pronounce it D as in David, a O. And so we are going to explore his book and explore what it means to practice being a Dallas.

Caroline Beste (4m 49s):
And, and then I'm going to do, like I said, a little intro here about the book and my experience being a practice Taoism to myself for 40, 40 years now, 39, 40 years now, for those of you that don't know, and then the girls are gonna, they've been reading the book and also practicing the Tao of Horsemanship. So we are going to talk about the wisdom of the doubt as you know, per Dr. Dyer's interpretation and translation, as well as our own personal translations and interpretations and understandings.

Caroline Beste (5m 30s):
And I think for me, more than anything is helping everyone become comfortable with Taoism, Buddhism, Zen. I think Zen is a much more popular word than Taoism or Buddhism because so many people think that being a Dallas or Buddhist is a religion. And so I'm gonna give you guys some history in a little bit, and hopefully what talk about today inspires you to read some of the readings in the philosophy of Dal ism, the teachings, because it is so amazingly enriching and valuable and applicable.

Caroline Beste (6m 14s):
I'm also going to talk about how we can, we can dumb it down, so to speak, because I think it's also very intimidating trying to understand Chinese culture and the way that they write and perceive versus American Western culture. So I'll talk about that a little bit. And then the girls are also going to chime in, which is going to be fun. I want to bring something up because it's important to me and I hope I don't cry, but as I was preparing my notes this morning, and we were going back and forth Jeaneen and sent me her notes and Jeaneen and I texted to actually, because I was sitting there writing, finishing up my notes and I was not thinking of my, my beloved, a legend, and I could not hear the radio in my barn and both my barns.

Caroline Beste (7m 6s):
I have a radio that plays the same station, 24 7, cause I love music and I love, I just love, you know, we love the memories. I don't get enough of it, but when I'm in my office and I I'm deep in thought, I can barely hear right. Deneen you've been in my office a million times. You can barely hear radio trust me. And I keep it low enough for me to like hear music. And if I pay attention, I can sometimes make out, depends on how loud they saying, make out what they're singing. But I was sitting there wrapping up and something made me think of, of, yes, something made me think of legend and the Trinity in Sundance and smoky.

Caroline Beste (7m 47s):
And there it was Whitney Houston song. I'll always love you. So when Legend Jeaneen was there with transitioned transitioned, when he, when we, I had to put him down and, and he probably took, was taking his last breath or perhaps had left his physical body. And I am, you know, weeping slobbering, weeping over him, wailing. And I stopped. And he, and you're my witness. And I stopped and we're out in front of the barn and I wasn't listening to the radio.

Caroline Beste (8m 28s):
Well, Jeaneen, you swear that the radio, you couldn't even hear it and you and the vet looked at each other, but I heard Whitney Houston song, as soon as I stopped and caught my breath. And I looked at you like, do you hear that? Yeah, the verse, the beautiful voice was, I'll always love you. And that was it, but nobody heard but me. So I wanted to say this B I wrote this little thing out because it's also a reminder of do the dowel now practice Taoism, because I have such a hard time losing anyone or any pet four legged or two legged family member.

Caroline Beste (9m 19s):
I have a really hard time letting go. And, you know, I think of legend all the time. He left me with a song and that's Whitney Houston song. He knew I would need to feel his presence daily. I'm still learning how to accept the loss of the physical form and be present with the knowing of the spirit and in whatever form of presence it takes. And for now legend shows up daily in a song that song, that particular song almost daily, it's been a lot more, it's been every day for like the last week. And maybe because mom's here, you know, my mom's now visiting and, and we're always talking about family and life and remembering things and, and, you know, pretty deep philosophical conversations.

Caroline Beste (10m 10s):
But he also shows up in my horses, which is really beautiful. And he doesn't show up in my horses. They don't act like him, but if I'm thinking, if I'm pausing or I'm doing something with them, and I'm thinking about him, it, the moment the moment comes together, where I may not even be consciously aware that I'm thinking, but they come in closer and they stop the moment, the moment that ever stops, they just stop. They just come right in. It's like, it doesn't matter what we're doing. They just, they let me know that they are aware of what's going on. It is such an, it is just beyond words.

Caroline Beste (10m 53s):
And that's, I wanted to open this conversation. I didn't have an opening, but this became my opening to what we're going to talk about today and how relevant it is to everything in our life. But especially horses is like, how do you create those experiences that leave you feeling they're just magical? You know, they're, they're, they're just amazing. I don't know how to explain it. I know both of you have had those moments and Lydia, you were telling me yesterday about, and we'll talk more about your young horse and Jeaneen, whenever you come back from your work in Kentucky and come visit your horses, you know that every time and you haven't seen him for weeks, they're right there.

Caroline Beste (11m 41s):
You know, there's so much, there's so much presence they're still present, but anyway, wow, you said something really beautiful. The Dal is beyond words. Yeah. That's probably why it's so hard. I remember one of my most influential clients as he, if they're not influential for me, it's not like, but they're influential in the horse world and you guys know who they are, but I'm not one to brag. They're influential in the horse world and they have the Mustang belongs to them.

Caroline Beste (12m 21s):
And I remember when I insisted that we meet before they just sent the Mustang to me, I'm like, you've got to meet me. I know you've seen me on my website, but you need to come to my, my, my home, my space. I want you to feel it. I want you to see it. I want you to know where he's going to be. I want to meet you. I want you to meet me. And I remember the dad asking me, so, Caroline, yes, I love it. There are wonderful people sitting in my butter couch over here in the guest houses. We're having this meeting. It's like 40 degrees and freezing outside in February. And this little guy is going to be shipped here in a week. And so what makes you, what is the dowel horsemanship and what makes you different than natural horsemanship?

Caroline Beste (13m 6s):
And I just, I was sitting back like this and I, I put my arms on my legs and I was kind of rubbing my hands together. And I looked down and I really wanted to think about this. And I couldn't think about anything. And I just looked up and I said, you just have to experience it. I can't, there are no words. I've tried all these years and I'm still trying to, you know, frame it somehow that makes it tangible and understandable, but you just have to experience it. It is such an experience to, to be in this mindset and this way of being in the horses, all animals pick up on it like that. It is, you know, we all wonder why animals and especially horses being so big gravitate towards children, especially children.

Caroline Beste (13m 56s):
And I do believe it is because they are in, when they, before they hit puberty and I call it the, the Rite of passage into adulthood, which sucks because, you know, you're, you, you're, you're more, self-conscious basically, and you become more easily influenced by social pressure. But before that, when you're untainted and innocent and, and even children that have trauma in their lives still have an innocence about them. And the horses love that. And it's, it's, they have, you know, this, this free abandonment, this, they come with a freedom with no attachment, no agenda, you know, no pressure.

Caroline Beste (14m 37s):
I really think that's the secret to why horses gravitate so much. But anyway, let's get back to our book review, you guys, for those of you that are joining us and did not get the email or about this particular podcast today. Welcome. And in, I'm going to read a little bit of what we sent out in our announcement about this, so that everyone has a better idea about what we're going to talk about. So I'm excited to present our new book review podcast series. This is our first one for summer, and it's going to be with my favorite teachings by Lao-Tzu.

Caroline Beste (15m 20s):
And he is a Chinese philosopher, so to speak. And Dr. Wayne Dyer author is wrote a beautiful translation of this particular book by Lao-Tzu. And the book is called Tao te Ching. And I'll talk a little bit about what that, what that book is all about. And so Dr. Dyer, how many of you are familiar with Wayne Dyer? Let us know in the comments area, change your thoughts, change your life. I'm living the wisdom of the dowel. It's a fabulous book. You can download it in audible so that you can just listen to it, which is easier for me. Sometimes I did buy the book because I love having a hard copy and making notes and highlighting and all that.

Caroline Beste (16m 4s):
But for quick purposes, the audible really worked for me. And I have not read the whole thing. I've only begun the book. So the girls are reading it. Maybe you guys have finished it ladies, but I'm, I'm just bringing in my 40 years of, of studying Taoism and, and how, you know, it coincides obviously in relates to this book in particular. So, so much of my developmental work and training for horses and their human partners is based on a lifetime study and practice of Dallas teaching specifically Lao-Tzu. So I've been a Dallas since I was a teenager and real quick, but that getting into that history, I was suffering from acute panic attacks and anxiety.

Caroline Beste (16m 52s):
And as a teenager in high school, and I was passing out, they were so bad, it was blacking out. And it was basically shutting down, going into self preservation mode, freeze mode, and just shutting down, shutting down. And basically you could call it learned helplessness. So my family was, you know, alcoholic drinking fighting. And so that was the big trauma that had basically over the years, broken down, broken up the nucleus of our family dynamic. It was really bad and my brothers were acting out and it was just really chaotic. So I shut down. And when I went into therapy, my therapist is the one that gave me my first book on meditation.

Caroline Beste (17m 35s):
And the, and this was to help me get out and get out of my head. My thoughts, because they were triggering me. They were overwhelming me. I was oversaturated over faced. So until I could learn how to understand what I was feeling and find the words to articulate how I was feeling, and then communicate how I was feeling is a three-step process before I could do that, I would just pass out. So she's like, let's just get you into meditating and learning how to calm your mind down and get back into your, feel, your senses, your body. So that was my first introduction into Chinese literature and philosophy and Dallas.

Caroline Beste (18m 18s):
And it was amazing. All right. Okay. So that's my background. So me and my guests today are excited to share with all of you what we've learned in Dr. Dyer's book, as well as share how Lao-Tzu in the great way has influenced and shaped my body of work with horses and people. So the prelude to this is basically 500 years ago before the birth of no, not, it was 2,500 years ago. How many years ago? Five, no, it's 500 years before, before the birth of Venus before the Bible, you guys, 500 years before. So this is like for 300, 480.

Caroline Beste (19m 3s):
This is where Lao-Tzu comes in the famous philosopher in his book Tao te Ching. So what Dr. Dyer has done is he's taken the 81 verses from the dowel teaching, the great way it's also called. And he offers advice and guidance that is balanced, moral, spiritual, and always concerned, you know, about working for the good, the betterment of all of us. So he reveals his understanding and translations of the dowel teaching and has created 81 distinct essays on how to apply the ancient wisdom of Lao-Tzu to today's modern world.

Caroline Beste (19m 48s):
And then we're going to expand a little bit on what he's presented in his book and what are our translations are and hoping that it just makes it interesting and inspired you guys to want to read this book by Dr. Dyer and inspires you to hopefully study or practice Daoism. We also, I brought a couple of books. There's also a 365 dowel daily meditations. You know, this stuff, isn't easy to read and I'm going to talk about how to go about it. So I really would start with doctor someone, a professional. Who's done a really great job job. I think translating, and I would start with a doctor dire before you start getting into some of these other books, and they've all been translated.

Caroline Beste (20m 33s):
You guys, so they're, they, they vary you. One, one scholar can have an edition. Another can have another edition in the same translation or the same book, but they're going to translate it differently. So you have to be really careful. So again, 500 years before the birth of Jesus, God realized been named Lao-Tzu in ancient China dictated 81 verses, which are regarded by many as the ultimate commentary on the nature of our existence. The classic text of these 81 verses called the dowel teaching or the great way offers advice and guidance that is balanced, moral, spiritual, and again, always concerned for the working good of mankind.

Caroline Beste (21m 18s):
In, in Dr. Dyer's program, he reviewed hundreds of translations of the dowel de chain and has created his 81 distinct essays on how to apply the ancient wisdom of Lao-Tzu to today's modern world. So it contains Dr. Dyer's work contains this book, the entire 81 verses of the doubt, compiled from Wayne's researching of 10 of the most well-respected translations of the tech that have survived for more than 25 centuries. As Wayne says, this is an audio book or book hard, hard copy that will forever change the way you look at your life.

Caroline Beste (21m 58s):
And the result will be that you'll live in a new world, aligned with nature, basically aligned with your nature. That's the key, your nature. And again, this is what for me, for all of us studying the doubt horsemanship, what I teach this is how easy it is to relate to horses, because we want to align ourselves with their nature, not make them or force them into something that they are not. So I'm so proud to present this interpretation of the dowel teaching and offer the same opportunity for change that it has brought to me. That is what Dr. Dyer said. And that's where he came up with change your thoughts, change your life, change your thoughts, change the way you think about things.

Caroline Beste (22m 42s):
And it changes right there. Just changes everything. So translation translating the Dallas philosophy and the talent. The dowel teaching is challenging. There are many different scholarly interpretations. I personally, Caroline had been studying and practicing thousand for 40 years. And in my studying experience, there are only a few books that have really resonated with me that I've, I've kept studying, you know, every so many years I pick them back up. I mean, I studied them religiously for years until it became more ingrained in not just a con mental conscious state, but in a physical form, like what I felt inside of me.

Caroline Beste (23m 30s):
And, and so, you know, your feelings dictate your actions, your feelings dictate your thoughts. And, and so what I want to help you guys understand is that the Dell's philosophy in the teachings are really simple, but you've, it's hard for the Western mind, the Western culture to understand this just because the Chinese culture has a way of writing poetically and metaphorically, very poetically and metaphorically. While the Western culture, America has a way of being dogmatic in very linear, dogmatic and linear.

Caroline Beste (24m 10s):
And this is what causes many people to shy away. I believe from Taoism, Buddhism, their philosophies and teachings, because it's, it's a, it's a mindset it's like, you have to retrain yourself on how to read the Dallas teachings or the Eastern philosophy, the way that they write and the way that they make sense, or they try to make sense of everything. I mean, don't, you guys feel that way when you first got into reading Jeaneen, like the dowel teaching, or, I don't know, you guys speak for yourselves on that one and you have to unmute yourself. Jeaneen you're muted love.

Jeaneen (24m 53s):
There we go. There you

Caroline Beste (24m 54s):
Go.

Jeaneen (24m 55s):
It's some background noise.

Caroline Beste (24m 59s):
Yeah. I mean, Lydia, you're more akin to this way, the Daoist way, you know, I think for some of us, it might feel like we've been there our whole life, and then you find the books and it's like, wow. You know, I understand. So I think Lydia might have a different personal experience with understanding death teachings and philosophy, just because you've maybe spent more time.

Lydia (25m 30s):
Yes. I've practiced it through. Well, first off, I, I, there isn't anything simple about the mind and I can't just instantly take a closed mind or a closed thought and turn it into being open. You know, like if I could think my way through that, like in an instant, you know, and say, oh, but like, Lao-Tzu says, first on first thought wrong thought we'll in a recovery program. We teach you that the minute you walk in the door, because there's this survival mechanism in the brain that can't get past what it already thinks and what its old ideas and beliefs are.

Lydia (26m 20s):
But they think what I think is helping me survive all this time, I have to be shown a way out. And I have to become aware that my mind is closed first, that I have a mindset that is stuck. And can't see, like maybe perhaps there is no really honest vision left for me because I've been in a preservation mode for too long. So my thoughts are what they are. And the daddy Ching constantly feed you practice and exercises to help you shift that mindset.

Lydia (27m 1s):
The program of alcoholics anonymous and the way the book was was given to us is you have to have a complete psychic change to stay sober well, in order to have a complete psychic change about anything, I have to go through a discovery process.

Caroline Beste (27m 20s):
It's almost like a breakdown. Yeah. It's almost like breaking down our old beliefs and rebuilding them with new beliefs. New have this. Yeah, no, I get that.

Lydia (27m 30s):
You, in your course, you start with understanding ourselves understanding forces and you walk us through the same exact thing that, that 12 step program does with horses though, with the awareness of where, what they have to teach us. Right. The nature of what they teach us that opens the door to this cage that I live in. Right?

Caroline Beste (28m 1s):
Yeah. No, that's a good point. And yeah. And, and you often, you know, in our podcasts, which is beautiful because I love it because it helps so many people reference, you know, the, you know, AA, the sobriety

Lydia (28m 14s):
Or Elena Elena's same way.

Caroline Beste (28m 17s):
Definitely that you've been in for 20 some years. And how similarly, unbeknownst to me, I'm not in AA or Alanon, but you know, I definitely grew up with a alcoholic drinking, dysfunctional family dynamic, and my part of my learning, how to not become that and, and be the best I can be the best version of myself and, you know, work on myself and work on all those other, maybe not as sabotaging, we all have sabotaging hat, coping mechanisms and habits, but maybe not as destructive as drinking, but still work on myself.

Caroline Beste (29m 1s):
It's interesting that the mastering,

Lydia (29m 4s):
Yeah. You had somebody grab you and guidance. You were so loud.

Caroline Beste (29m 9s):
Yeah. They, they did. They did. My, my, my therapist was amazing and, and knowing how to help me out of, I mean, I couldn't speak for months and therapy right. Pass out. So I mean, I, it was crazy. You guys absolutely crazy. And then Jeaneen for you, you know, you, you got back into horses 10 years ago and you were at a high profile show barn and it didn't take you long to go from that extreme and then find me, the other

Jeaneen (29m 43s):
Instinctively know, knew this wasn't comfortable here. They're there. This isn't right though.

Caroline Beste (29m 50s):
It didn't feel right

Jeaneen (29m 51s):
To feel the horses and sadness and locked up and stalls

Caroline Beste (29m 57s):
Anxiety,

Jeaneen (29m 58s):
Like three hours a day, you know, it just, yeah. And it just was led to you and then we'll do ever since, and yeah, that's why this book was just a continuing education. I really like how he is the homework, you know, that we can really work and develop. So

Caroline Beste (30m 16s):
Yeah.

Lydia (30m 17s):
Well, how long have you, has it been since she discovered Caroline, how long have you been with her

Jeaneen (3m 44s):
Jeaneen? Eight years. Yeah. So lead has been there living with her for eight years and Callen back and forth for probably six.

Jeaneen (30m 31s):
Is that about right Carolina?

Caroline Beste (30m 36s):
Yeah. I started at Callan in Pennsylvania when he was four and then I moved to Florida and he got, he got ruined and he sat for years and then she wanted me to find him a student. And so I did that, the old place up the road and Jeaneen was with me at that time. And the student had the best intentions, but like my husband always says within tension, what does that same

Lydia (31m 4s):
Is paved with good intentions

Caroline Beste (31m 9s):
And shit. So it was, it was, she just kept triggering him the anxiety and callin your, your other horse. And so eventually it worked out and Jeaneen fell in love with Kalyn when she first saw him. So what, two years later it worked out and she offered him. She sold him to you. And he came back to us and it took a couple of years. And you'll, I want you to talk about that later on The work, just how this works and in the three of us can talk about it, but let me finish up with this real quick. Thank you. And so, so you're getting back to anyone that is reluctant or unsure about just reading and studying Dallas or Buddhism.

Caroline Beste (31m 60s):
You know, remember we come from a totally different culture and it does take time to simulate the mindset or the, where are they coming from. And so just think of it as it's more poetic, when you're thinking about Chinese teachings, Taoism specifically, it's a lot more metaphorical. There is really no answer for anything. It's not that linear it, they give you the way they write, gives you the opportunity to interpret it. However, you're ready to interpret it. It goes along with the saying that I always say in my work, you only know what, you know, you don't know what you don't know.

Caroline Beste (32m 42s):
And so when you come into it, you'll, you'll meet that understanding wherever you are personally, and it will have its own meaning for you. That's, that's the beauty of philosophy. As you can have these big groups and discussions and you all can, we can all walk away with a little bit different of a, of an understanding of the same sentence or the same verse. And that's what I love about some of the books that I have to me. They're like Bibles because as I continue to challenge myself and grow, or some years, I just kind of sit in the same place, but then when I'm ready to grow again, I go back to what has worked for me. I go back to the scene readings. I might've had 20, 30 years ago and it takes on sometime to take on a completely different meaning for me.

Caroline Beste (33m 28s):
So it's kind of like when it, when the student is ready, the teacher appears in this one verse or this one chapter, I could have read 10 times, but in the last 30 years it's had a T you know, each time it's had a totally different meaning for me, impact. And then that is the beauty I have found in my personal experience, being a Dallas and, and studying and practicing is that you're, you're hoping that, you know, you're evolving in, in, you're evolving towards a place of more balance, inner balance. You can't control anything, but your thoughts, if you can never control them and peace and wellbeing.

Caroline Beste (34m 10s):
So I understand like any new habit or skill, it feels awkward, uncomfortable, and sometimes foreign to the intellect and the body. And in time with practice, these feelings go away and we create a knowing and understanding, and it, it feels right. So I promise that if you take the time to read and practice each day, it will come in in waves. You could never have imagined. And any time you feel lost or unsure or scared, go back to reading and practicing what, what felt right and good in your heart and body. And you will find the ease, the inner peace, the balance, and the wellbeing that we all want to feel instead of the chaos, the anxiety, and this I know to be true, this is the Dao.

Caroline Beste (34m 54s):
So what does, Lao-Tzu the Tao te Ching mean? So dowel means the way. So the doubt of horsemanship, it's the way of horsemanship. It's not the only way, but it is a way a path, the T T E tout Dow teachings. Now we're on the tee. It means shape and power, how the doubt manifests itself. And then the chain means book. So the way shape empower book. So the T part adds light in color to the way.

Caroline Beste (35m 37s):
So the way of the book, the way it shapes the power of the book. So the towel, the dowel teaching translates very roughly as the way of integrity. And it's 81 verses it delivers a treaties on how to live in the world with goodness and integrity. I love the word honor and important kind of wisdom in a world where many people believe such a thing to be impossible. We can certainly see that in today's times really challenging. So what is Daoism to many people, a confusing aspect of Dal ism is its very definition. Many religions will happily push judgment and dogma, which is which in reflection defines a person that was in flips this around.

Caroline Beste (36m 23s):
It starts, starts by teaching a truth, a truth, a principle or a truth. The Dow is in definable. It then follows up by teaching that each person can discover the doubt on their own terms. It's just, that's why it always comes back to the naturalness of things and the nature of your very being our horses, very B. And so often, you know, we're given all of this training to, to either become something skilled or training to, to make our horses very skilled at something in while I love training.

Caroline Beste (37m 3s):
And I love to be very skilled. Technically it's finding that balance of having that, that defined or that definitive goal, but the balance is allowing you or allowing your horse to get there when you get there. And as you need to get there, how you need to get there. So again, we're not going linear, linearly at something and pushing our way through, which is American culture, Western culture. I used to be of that mindset, having a former business, it was very bam, bam, bam, bam.

Caroline Beste (37m 48s):
I, you know, you got to know yourself, you gotta know your personality, your traits, your character, your nature, you know, and I think a lot of us, a lot of the women that are attracted to my work, we are very similar in our, in our personality traits, you can call us type a personalities or driven, you know, ambitious we're thinkers or feelers, highly, highly sensitive, high end paths where all of these things. And, and sometimes as I say, it can be a curse and a gift and it's a curse if you don't, if you don't allow it and understand it and accept it, it's a curse. If you fight that, or if you allow other influences to tell you what you should be instead of allowing you to be what you already are.

Caroline Beste (38m 33s):
And the gift is understanding that they are all of these things are gifts and what do you do with them? You know, and, and, and so forth. So teaching like Taoism can be, as I mentioned earlier, very hard to grasp when most people desire, very concrete definitions, black and white in their own life. And so right. There's a mind set shift. And so a simple way of starting to learn the definition of Dallas, and this is start within yourself. And I took this from someone else. So this isn't what I personally practice, but I think that it's, it's a great start.

Caroline Beste (39m 17s):
Here are three easy starting steps to learning Dallas. Don't concentrate on the meany. Number one of doubt. This will come later. Naturally. I do agree with that. So don't just focus on, well, what is the Dow? And am I living the Dow? Am I the Dow? Just keep reading, keep practicing, keep an open mind for the lack of a better word. Number two, understand what Dallas is. It's more than just a philosophy or a religion that wasn't should be understood as a state of being. I say that in all of my work, especially in a mastery membership writing foundation program. So it is a program that it is a program.

Caroline Beste (39m 57s):
It's just a container. What happens inside this container, this program, and you have a, there is a step-by-step guide, but it really is. It's, it's both balanced, right. Is both firm and definitive in some ways, practices try this, but it's very open and it gives you the permission and it helps you shape shift to that mindset to allowing how you show up and how your horse shows up during the work you have this ultimate, how it should show up perhaps right for you and your horse that is unique to the two of you, how it should show up. But first we have to understand how we show up before we can get to the next place and your exit.

Caroline Beste (40m 43s):
So it's really

Lydia (40m 44s):
Your exercises and your try. This is just that. Exactly.

Caroline Beste (40m 52s):
Yeah. Thank you, Lydia. Yeah, they, you know, it's a, it's a state of being you guys, it's a system of beliefs, attitudes, and practices set towards a service and living to a person's nature. That's the naturalness of the Dow in. We'll talk a little bit more about that. Yeah. It's, it's, we're keep coming back to nature. Keep coming back to nature. The nature of us, the nature of our nature. Yeah. Yeah. And then three of the path of understanding Dal ism is simply accepting oneself. Now just wait, you guys don't think that accepting means you don't do anything about anything.

Caroline Beste (41m 33s):
It's just the beginning of understanding and accepting. You can always change and evolve. Changes in transformation is also big in Dallas. So the path number three of understanding Dallas wasn't as simply accepting oneself, this leads to inner peace live life and discover who you are, your nature is ever changing. And it's always the same. Here's the duality, here's a yin and yang. Again, don't try to resolve the various contradictions in life instead, learn acceptance of your nature. I think so much, you know, my experience, you know, growing up, just, you know, with parents and family dynamics and in life, I think we can all agree that there we are.

Caroline Beste (42m 21s):
There's so much unnecessary influence, you know, societal influence, family influence, you know, influence everywhere. And we, we spend very little time listening or we're not taught how to listen to what we really want. And I think that's part of the chaos that's going on in our culture today in America specifically is there's been such a level of suppression on and that, you know, there's whenever we have extremes there, extremes are unhealthy and in Dallas really focuses. And I'll get into this in a little bit on balancing balancing polarities and balancing duality.

Caroline Beste (43m 5s):
There's always contradiction in life. It's, it's being aware of the contradiction and seeking the balance of it. Not ignoring it, not dismissing it. I'm not trying to possibly change it so much is understanding the conflict that's inside of us or around us, and then seeking the resolution, the balance of that. And there's such an extreme in our country today, personally in America, because we are still unbalanced and, and, and we've been suffering for a long time and there's also a lot of to meet poison that's been going on and personally, and I don't want to get political, but I think, and you know, yeah, there's just, there's, everything is really upside down right now to say the least in our country and this, you know, practicing Dallas and would be a great way to, for anyone to find that, that, that, that amazing shift that is needed to help us feel like we're not like getting lost in the craziness or the chaos or everyone should be doing it.

Caroline Beste (44m 12s):
Lout. Sue, the dowel teaching is also called the solitary path to mastery can be gained by letting things go their own way. Now there's lots of contradictions and a lot of these writings. So again, don't think that that means you don't do anything. Just hang on. So written the doubt written by Lao-Tzu in 400 BC, 500 years before Christ is the most translated book in the world. Did you guys realize that it's the most translated book in the world? It is known as the book of the Dow and is in, is a guide to cultivating a life of peace, serenity and compassion through, how do you say that aphorisms in parable, it leads readers towards the doubt or the way harmony with the life force of the universe.

Caroline Beste (45m 2s):
I know that sounds all too esoteric sometimes, but I'm not trying to dive in real deep. So the Dowdy chain yeah. Is an ancient Chinese philosophical and moral text often attributed to allow Zhou. The old master, the verse can be difficult to understand. And many people have spent their entire lives dedicated to the study of the doubt teaching. So I'm going to jump ahead cause I'm just kind of giving you guys introduction to then we'll let the girls really dive in deep and it's okay if we go over time and we can always have a part two, what are the three main beliefs of Dal ism?

Caroline Beste (45m 44s):
Let's let's put this in there. So the important Dallas principles are inaction simplicity and living in harmony with nature. So those are the three core beliefs. And again, this, this information that I'm providing, I've extracted, I've been studying and reading for years. And like I said, there's a lot of different translations. So, but this is the most prominent, you know, most people agree that are translating am the, the doubt that it is inaction. This is one of the core beliefs, simplicity, and living in harmony with nature.

Caroline Beste (46m 25s):
It's like when I talk about the chakra system and shopper energies, there's so many ways to define some of the characteristics that each of the chakra planes, but I only talk about the ones that we can relate to more easily within us and then relate to our horses. So I'm just pulling what I've come to know as you know, the most common well understood. And of course what I've experienced. So the law of inaction, we're going to talk about that or the belief simplicity and what it means to live in simplicity, what it means to live in inaction. I'm going to talk about that and living in harmony.

Caroline Beste (47m 6s):
So, so what is the Chinese philosophy of do nothing? This is what inaction means. It's called oui. So in Taoism, a Chinese philosophical school, there is a principle called oui, which means effortless action or do nothing. So doing nothing doesn't mean you shouldn't do anything instead. It means that you should, to your inner voice, as intuitive actions are sometimes better than rationally forced. Once I'm now going to jump to the Dow is comprised of five basic teachings. So we talked about the three beliefs, core beliefs in action, simplicity and living in harmony with nature and with the nature of who you are and who your horse is.

Caroline Beste (47m 52s):
Now, we're going to talk about their five there's five. I don't, some people say there's three. Some people say there's four, there are five. To me, there are five basic teachings or principles that can transform your life. And your horsemanship. Number one is simplicity. And with simplicity comes patience and compassion. Understanding these three are your greatest treasures, simple and actions and thoughts. You returned to the stores of being patient with both friends and enemies. You accord with the way things are compassionate toward yourself. You'd reconcile all beings in the world.

Caroline Beste (48m 36s):
Like it can get complicated quite easily, but sometimes all we need to do is get back to the basics when feeling overwhelmed, these guidelines, present essential rules and how to manage actions, relationships, self-worth in a few concise sentences. So when we're talking, we girls about practicing the Dow do the down now is Dr. Dyer says, it's taking just number one, simplicity, patience, and compassion, and, and PR and reading as an, not an affirmation, a daily affirmation, but a daily meditation or a daily mantra, reading simple inactions and thoughts.

Caroline Beste (49m 17s):
You return to the source of being, reading patients with both friends and enemies, you accord with the way things are reading compassionate towards yourself. You reconcile all beings in the world. Maybe you type that out and stick it in your purse and you take it everywhere with you. Believe me, I've done that. Believe me. When I was developing the Dell horsemanship and my methodology, I created an Ostrom on my first farm in Whitehaven, Maryland in the middle of nowhere, it was on the water. It was absolutely amazing and beautiful. And, and so I got out of DC and out of the city life went completely to the other extreme of quiet and solitude to study and travel and, and create.

Caroline Beste (50m 2s):
And so I would tell whoever I was studying with in horsemanship in all different disciplines, too, I was taking notes as well as buying their literature, but I was, I was rewriting it to how it made sense to me so that I could also take it out of my pocket and practice. And alongside of that, I was taking all of the readings understandings I had been studying in Dallas and in compiling that information and in how could I take what I was practicing with my horse in a way that, that, that followed a Dallas belief system. I measured everything I was being taught in horsemanship.

Caroline Beste (50m 45s):
I measured it all with what I had learned 20 years of learning, practicing, experiencing, and, and, and feeling good and better. Did it bring, or my horse ease? Could I take something complicated? Like my horse being challenged and triggered and how could I take that complication and take the path of least resistance so that we weren't fighting, or I wasn't fighting, but I was learning why or what was triggering them. It's it's huge. You guys. So I was taking those two different worlds, you know, being taught by this very linear type of horsemanship.

Caroline Beste (51m 28s):
Here's your goal? Here's your exercise. Go to it and get it done. There was no really trying to understand what happens when the horse doesn't understand it or can't do it. What do you do then? And so many of us are in that situation all the time predominantly. So number two is honor yourself. Wow. I can't say how many times I talk about honoring yourself and honoring the horse. How do we honor our horses? How do we respect them? But how do we honor them? How do you honor yourself? How do you respect yourself? Allow you to be, you feel things and see things the way you do course correct on the way when you deem necessary, but ultimately don't wish for yourself to be different work with what you have instead, and strive for balance.

Caroline Beste (52m 19s):
Get rid of the idea of how you should be based on the surroundings and others expectations. I get, you know, how do you stop that, those voices in your head of, of a life, of living for someone else or hearing someone else's voice you practice it by basically, it's not fake it till you make it, but drone it out with these types of mantras and meditations until they become your normal, your new, normal way of thinking. And believe me, you, it will take over in a positive way. So ask yourself honest questions.

Caroline Beste (52m 59s):
That's very important and patiently wait for you to show up with the answers. And because it matters. An example for me is patiently wait for the answers. So when I have something that's troubling me, I have a grid work, so to speak a formula for myself. And so if it's, if I'm, if it's really bothering me, something's really bothering me about somebody or something that was said. And I usually give it three days, at least three days. And then does it still really resonate strongly within me after the third day, then I feel that maybe I'm too attached to it, or maybe it's really mostly I'm too attached to it.

Caroline Beste (53m 51s):
But right now I'm a, I'm a work in progress. So I may not be able to let that go. And I may feel the need to say something or do something about it. But I give myself at least three days because we're working towards not being attached to the best of our ability, not being attached to the emotion, not being attached to a specific outcome that we feel we need to have. And like I said, sometimes in three days, maybe five days, I can't let it go. And I have to say something, that's my journey though. I'm not judging myself. I wouldn't judge anyone else for that, but it does work better when I can let it go.

Caroline Beste (54m 35s):
It really does. And, and, and not force the situation. So that is just asking honest questions and learning how to patiently wait for you to show up with the answer. And like, it's all our own journey. Sometimes I've got to say something, even if it doesn't work out the way I would have hoped, that's my journey. That's where I am in that moment. And sometimes I don't and sometimes it dissipates and I'm like, wow, I'm so glad. I didn't say anything so often we are so attached to that feeling and that trigger that we don't give ourselves enough. We don't honor ourselves or give ourselves permission to just step back from it.

Caroline Beste (55m 18s):
Step back from it, try to get some objectivity and it could even be your horsemanship. If you're really stuck in something we're so taught in, in, in Western culture to just push, make it happen and get it done, get it done, get it done. So number three is change. Wow. Life is a cycle. The perfectly rounded circle shape of the Dallas symbol represents the continuation of life and all things. One of its indications is a cycle of life. A dear eight tree leaves in the forest to stay alive when it died. It's decaying body fed the soil that grows the trees. That is a simple cycle that we can observe.

Caroline Beste (55m 58s):
There are many larger, more prominent in complicated universal mechanisms that are too complex for our perception. Some of our senses are not yet developed to even comprehend a process. The change that results in our feeling of being lost or being treated unfairly. Ah, that's a really important thing to think about. And that's when we blast anger towards the unknown. I think I just talked about that a little bit. Simply put we are playing. Yeah, we are playing a game that we don't know, all the rules and winning in one area doesn't apply to another and it's not about winning. Yeah. I kind of just talked about that. Some of our senses are not yet developed to even comprehend or process the change.

Caroline Beste (56m 42s):
My interpretation and experience with the senses is also the intuitive side. You know, when you give yourself time to step away and not be attached to a situation or a feeling or an outcome, it does hopefully give you clarity. It's learning how to be, you know, detached in a healthy way, more objective, as well as step away, you know, step away and hopefully get quiet and still, and then you get out of your head and tune more into what you feel, what the truth is of your feeling. And, you know, we all have had hardships and trauma in our lives, some much more than others.

Caroline Beste (57m 27s):
And I don't, you know, and all the personal coaching and developmental work that I've done with thousands of students over the years that I love to do, especially in the private immersions or the intuitive workshops, you know, we, the biggest thing I find one of the biggest challenges for most women is giving themselves permission to feel what they feel and, and validating those feelings by just giving permission and learning how to honor that and hold the space for that and hold that, holding the space and honoring, and you don't have to have the answer you, you know, but just allowing yourself to feel what you feel just changes.

Caroline Beste (58m 7s):
It really shapes and shifts. So, so much more easily. So, yep. Number four, flow, go with the flow. And Deneen you love this when nothing is done, nothing is left, done, done, ah, everything. There's always such a, a paradox isn't there. This quote explains the concept of where we, the law of non-action uncontrived action or natural non intervention woowee is uncontrived action or natural non-intervention in life rather than fighting against the conditions in our lives. We can allow things to take their natural course.

Caroline Beste (58m 48s):
This can also mean that when you don't know what to do, do nothing, instead only jump at opportunities. When you feel ready. Number five is harmony. It is achieved through balance. Balancing is an act, but also a habit. We walk through life thinking it is a journey on a paved road leading somewhere, but actually really we are constantly walking on a line between good and evil between reacting and responding between giving and taking. We are constantly at a, and instead of letting it pressure us, we could take it as an immense blessing.

Caroline Beste (59m 29s):
Examples of this mindset come from Dr. Dyer, Wayne Dyer change the way you look at things. And the things you look at change is so profound. I love that. Number two, how people treat you is their karma. How you react is yours. That's a work in progress. Number three, with everything that has happened to you, you can either feel sorry for yourself or treat what has happened as a gift. Everything is either an opportunity to grow or an obstacle to keep you from growing. You get to choose. I love that. And I think I talk about that in a different way. In my mastery membership program with the personal development is, you know, everybody's like, oh, I made a mistake.

Caroline Beste (1h 0m 12s):
I'm so afraid of making a mistake. And I say, change the word. The language mistake is an opportunity to learn. You just don't want to keep repeating it. All right. Then that becomes the definition of insanity. So number four, when you judge another, gimme a second here, turn that off. When you judge another, you do not define them. You define yourself. So that's, that's a good one. I am a very opinionated person. I think you all know that, but I am not a judgemental person. How, when someone does something to you or you feel that they're doing something to you, we've never walked in their shoes.

Caroline Beste (1h 1m 2s):
We don't know what's motivated them. If they're even doing it to us consciously or unconsciously, we were just talking about that earlier, girls, number 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, you are not stuck where you are, unless you decide to be. I love that. Number six conflict cannot survive without our participation. I love that. And what was the number seven? What hun, what you got to show up for the fight? You don't have to show up. Exactly.

Caroline Beste (1h 1m 42s):
I love that perfectly said. And the last one circumstances do not make a man. They reveal him. I always say, wait until shit hits the fan. That's when you really know someone or who's in your corner. So to speak, when stuff gets tough, it reveals your relationships, your marriages, your friendships, the dynamics in your relationships. Not that it should be that tough. All right, let me get through this. I'm almost done you guys. And then I'm passing it over to the girls, the Chinese concept of yin and yang. I think everyone's familiar with the, the black and white symbol of the yin and yang.

Caroline Beste (1h 2m 22s):
They're both equal in shape and in color black and white. That's all about balance and about polarities and dualities in life. It's also also similar to the woowee. So the Chinese concept of yin and yang describes nature in dualities with two opposite complimentary and interdependent forces. In other words, two halves balancing together, make a hole in and yang always flow and change with time. One aspect increases as the other decreases. And this balance continues as a pattern in nature. The night becomes the day the sky meets the earth. Rain becomes the sun.

Caroline Beste (1h 3m 2s):
So examining and understanding these patterns in ourselves and around us brings more balance in life. For example, a person that becomes too rigid may break under pressure. Instead they should become softer and more flexible to restore the balance of the yin and yang. So just to leave you guys with a couple of things from me, how do we apply the teachings of Lao-Tzu the dowel teaching to our everyday life and to our horsemanship? I think I talked about our lives and a little bit about our horsemanship learn. You know, everyone wants to be in harmony with horses.

Caroline Beste (1h 3m 43s):
To me, it begins with being in harmony with who your horse is, not what you want them to be, who they are, not what you want them to be. And that goes in any relationship that is friendship, parent, child, spouse, partner, whoever it is in your life. Horses, to me represent one word relationships. They, the relationship you have with your horse usually can be easily identified in every other relationship. And that's a question I ask all of my students when I meet them as well. Does your horse reflect or mirror other aspects of your life? Usually, yes.

Caroline Beste (1h 4m 24s):
So learn to be in harmony with who your horse is. And then that goes back to learning your horse, learning how to read them, understand them, get to know them, get to know their nature, their behaviors, their intrinsic needs and their personal needs. And Trinsic is instinctual needs. Horses need have basic needs just like humans, you guys. And I know we all know the basic psychology of horses, that basic instincts, but there's more to it than what is out there. There's a lot more to what is out there. And if you Revere horses like we do as sentience, intelligent, emotionally intelligent feeling Sentium to beans, then it is more complicated than just the basic psychology that's out there with horses.

Caroline Beste (1h 5m 18s):
So I'll leave you with this in my experience, all bad behavior, horse behavior, equine behavior stems from two things, two things, two things, one, their needs are not being met. Both their intrinsic instinctive needs and their personal nature, their personality, what they personally need, because they are unique individual. And number two, all the behavior also stems from coping mechanisms. I've said this a million times, your horse develops like we do certain behaviors because they're frustrated, confused.

Caroline Beste (1h 5m 58s):
They feel helpless, trapped, misunderstood, frustrated, and they're just trying to survive. All right. I have three great quotes and I ended there. I think I only, oh yes, I have them right here to explain the seven virtues of water and their connection with the way of life. I talk about water all the time in my work with horses and people. Water is the true embodiment of humility, depth, kindness, integrity, unbiased to nature, versatility, and going with the flow like water. One must be content and adapt to things according to time without changing one's actual composition.

Caroline Beste (1h 6m 44s):
Whew, that's a deep one trying to understand is like straining through muddy water, have the patience to wait beast. So that's one, that's the second one trying to understand something is like straining through muddy water. If you find that you're really struggling to understand whatever's going on, have the patience to sit still and wait, I've done this for months, many, many months, more so than years before I just kind of understood what it meant. But sometimes years, cause we're just not ready and we're constantly fighting and it can come step peace can come so much more quickly if we follow some of these practices and the third quote is be still and allow the mud to settle, let it be still.

Caroline Beste (1h 7m 37s):
And it will gradually become clear. All right, I know that's an hour. Let's put in another half an hour girls and Lydia, I know you and you, you're a great talker. You could have your own podcast. I'm going to let Jeaneen <inaudible>, she's shy, shy. We're not shy. And I highlighted Jeaneen. I mean the things that I'd like you to talk about. So do you have your sheet of paper in front of you or your, what you wrote

Jeaneen (1h 8m 15s):
A couple of verses that I threw out that meant a little more to me or I enjoy. And the 37 30, that was one that you had touched on earlier several times, the doubt does nothing and leaves nothing undone, and even read this. If powerful men could center themselves in it, the whole world would be transformed by itself. And then natural rhythms. The life is simple. Pretenses, fall away. Our essential nature shine through, by not wanting there is calm and the world was straightened itself when there is silence.

Jeaneen (1h 8m 55s):
One finds the anchor of the universe with within oneself. Yeah. So yeah, it, it doesn't mean do nothing. Like we would think, you know, sit around and not strive for success or achievement. That that's what our culture would define as doing nothing, but doing nothing means something different here. It means live with the understanding of the Dao, the way of the God of the universe. It means to live in alignment with his wisdom and not fight against the principles. The principles are the new one verses of the value chain And homework in the book.

Jeaneen (1h 9m 44s):
What did I say? So it was something simple living simply. Yeah. And then he just says print or copied the two first lines of this first, the Dow does nothing, that things, nothing left and done read these words until you committed them to memory. That's why I just love this book. Not only does he tell you it similarly what you said, put it in your pocket, you know, but what to do with it, how to live, live this yourself, the air, the sky, the clouds, Gress, when and flowers, nothing natural that you see is undone, but nothing is taking place to work it all out.

Jeaneen (1h 10m 26s):
It is all accomplished by the truth of these words. So

Caroline Beste (1h 10m 31s):
Yes. And how, like, how do you, hi everybody too. I'm just getting on Facebook right now. You guys are still here. Hi everybody. How do you Jeaneen see the, the effects of practicing Dow is the philosophy, the mindset. How does that, you know, how has it affected your horsemanship, your relationship with your horses?

Jeaneen (1h 11m 3s):
Just for me just to settle down. And she's always said, just be, be with the horses. You know, I've got this busy mind, you know, always thinking about work what's next and all this is going on and I'm trying to ride my horse and they're confused, torturing the boring things.

Caroline Beste (1h 11m 24s):
'cause your mind is so busy and, and you it's like you gotten your horses, want to spend more time with you. Like I remember when, when spring was here and you were like, oh my gosh, I want to pay you to ride them Caroline, and, and do something with them. And I'm like, no, not, no, you're not going to do that. I don't want to do that. And they don't need that. You know, they have a foundation through the mastery membership. They have a beautiful foundation. You can, you can come back two years later with any horse that has a foundation in my work. They will never forget. We all might be out of shape, but they don't forget. And they, and it's the relationship that matters the most though, you know, they want, they want this space of bonding and connecting this way that presents, ease and feels good to them.

Caroline Beste (1h 12m 13s):
Not pressure, you know, not making things happen. And, and, and believe me, we get things done. You know, we go for trail rides, you and me, we can lend our horses. We can do activities and specific techniques with them, but we want it to be enjoyable. You know, we want an enjoyable, I think it, I know in American Western culture, it fruit with horsemanship enjoyable means let's play games with our horses. You know, let's make this big obstacle course, or let's just go trail riding. Let's just do what the worst wants to do. But this is what, you know, I keep trying to share with everyone in my learning with horses and understanding, and it's it's, they w they need things, their needs, their emotional needs are so similar to ours, you know, it's, it's like, how do you make what you do?

Caroline Beste (1h 13m 5s):
A technical and arena, exercise, something really technical, enjoyable. How do you make something like that feel amazing for both of you? You know, that's what I teach. So it's like you and I, and we can go for a trail ride, or we can go out in the big 10 acre field and just sit on our horses and ride around. And the whole herd is with us. And so often in the past, you know, we've done plenty of, you know, a video, Facebook sharing us, just being with them. And for an hour, while they're grazing or they're sleeping, they're not even eating, but they're just sleeping with us on their backs. And all the other horses are around us. And it's like, the more time we spend in that space, in that state of being with them, which is where they, they want to be, you know, that's the intrinsic nature of horses that, you know, how they share space and relationship.

Caroline Beste (1h 14m 2s):
It just evolves. It keeps evolving. They want to be with us more and more. It feels good. There, they feel safe. They're open to learning. It's us finding that duality, that, that balance of taking that state of being into the work. That's what the mastery membership teaches. How do you take that state of being into the work that, and then check yourself, test yourself, hoop. I lost it. Whoops. There's tightness. There's brace. I lost the relaxation. I lost the flow. I lost the fluidity, the harmony of, of being and moving with my horse. You stop you pause. You regroup.

Caroline Beste (1h 14m 42s):
Yeah. No, it's been beautiful. Yeah, it's really cool. I have a neat story real quick. And then we can get to Lydia yesterday. I was putting the horses out. I take care of all the horses every evening, seven days a week. Yeah, for now. It's all good. I love it. I love it. I love it until I don't love it anymore. I'll keep doing it. And I was putting, I have two herds and two sides to my farm, two big areas, two different Hertz. And I was putting the big herd out and the baby was out in the big herd cause he was playful and he wanted to play with Subrosa and he wanted to play with, with Lando, the Mustang.

Caroline Beste (1h 15m 26s):
Well, he was in the 20 meter arena and because they were all a Callan was in there and they were munching on the grass that's growing up and all that. And the gates are open and he sees me come, you know, okay, I'm coming to close the back alley here. So they can't come into the barn and open up to the big field. And he's, he's like, I don't know. Maybe I don't even know where it is. A hundred feet away from me at the gate here. I'm like, come on baby. And he's like pushing, pushing. And the 20 meter in dressage it's a 20 meter circle, but I made a 20 meter square. And it's only three feet high. If that you guys send the babies 17 hands.

Caroline Beste (1h 16m 8s):
So he's pushing up on it with his chest. He's smart. He's like, oh, I can't push through this. And I'm like, baby, one day you'll be able to jump that, but not right now. So I'm like, look at me, go to the gate. Well, he looks, and then if he kicks out frustrated, you know, his tantrums kicks out and starts pushing again and kicking out. And I went blue baby, go to the gates. I've never done this to him, but because we work a certain way all the time and he knows how to read me. He does know how to send this time. He looked and he went and he picked up a chalk and Suzy and the gate was halfway open.

Caroline Beste (1h 16m 49s):
So he took his time, slowed down. As soon as he got out of it, he kicked up his heels and galloped to me. So, you know, this stuff's really amazing. He's like my experiment. Yeah. I mean, he's had some, some, I hate to say training. He's had some development. He's only four since I've had him as a wean lane because he's needed some horribly learned anxious behaviors. I've had to help him through the work. If he had been a healthy young horse, you know, he would have learned to just some basic things. But you all have seen some video of him in the mastery membership.

Caroline Beste (1h 17m 29s):
You've seen some video of him in my video library and on YouTube, you know, he's, he's, he had a tough time when he first came here. He was, he was a real mess. He's not the same horse though. And that's been, my experiment is how can I do nothing and accomplish a lot. So it's, it's really cool. It's really cool. Anything else you want to say to me before?

Jeaneen (1h 17m 53s):
Yeah. My example in my case was callin coming back to me two years ago and he came back with triggers. He did have about the base, the foundation from the mastery membership for Caroline training actually. And, but you know, he, he had left and taken away and came back with trigger. So when I came back, I'm busy working, traveling back and forth. So I didn't have a lot of time with him. And when I do come back, I really just I'm do nothing. I sit with them, you know what I would say to Caroline? Okay, should I be, what should I be doing? You know, no, just instinctively just be with them.

Jeaneen (1h 18m 34s):
And over the last two years, many of those triggers are gone. I'm doing nothing. You know? So that was my big example. That's my, I had the aha moment here. It's like, well, that's what I've been doing. And now he's just relaxed, just happy and just, yeah. So engaged. And I really start to feel that what she's been saying all along, be one with your horse, I can really feel it. It's just, you are connected. You know, I can hear those words, you know, that she's always said, but it's taking this time to really feel it and understand that

Caroline Beste (1h 19m 9s):
I get it. I get it. You know, I, I too have been down that, that road early in my course, midship and study and, and relearning, you know, make it happen. If your horse has a problem, take him to a behavioral clinic in desensitize and do all this crazy stuff. And it's like, if you said good habits, and I remember I handle these horses every day. So in my staff, which is just me and Clarissa, so now we set good habits. We do the same things. We handle the horses the same way. And, and that gives us a sense of safety. That routine, a sense of security.

Caroline Beste (1h 19m 51s):
And when horses like people feel sorry, guys, I'm doing my sour patch,

Jeaneen (1h 19m 58s):
Their favorite.

Caroline Beste (1h 20m 0s):
I know that sense of security and safety in our environment. We relaxed. This is simple and we are open, open to trusting, open to learning. And so, you know what I hope I'm teaching in mastery membership is yeah, you have this big program from a to Z. You can accomplish everything you've ever wanted with your horse, but it's the approach. It's how you go about it. And the baby is my biggest experiment because he came to me traumatized and damaged. I had to do a little bit of work with him that I've been honest about and have shown publicly because he was dangerous around bags and tarps. And there was no reason for him to be that way.

Caroline Beste (1h 20m 42s):
And he was beginning to crib and he had to find a way to self-sooth him self through his parasympathetic nervous system. You know? So I had to do some things to help him find those healthy behaviors that would self-soothe him. And then I've left him alone because I know that my herd are his teachers, his environment is his teacher, including me in Clarissa. And there's so much as a, as a, when you have your horses at home, especially that you can set up in such a, a non-direct way of positively influencing all of your, your pets and your kids.

Caroline Beste (1h 21m 29s):
So, yeah, it's really cool. Anyway, thank you Jeaneen. Thank you for that, Lydia. I know you and I could have part two, love you go what'd you got to say,

Lydia (1h 21m 43s):
Okay, I have a lot going through my brain right now because I've been taken on what you guys say. So what I'm going to say is basically through the process of recovery and working the 12 steps and Alanon and AA, I was at a certain place where to thine own self be true. Makes sense. Okay. You know, the shame, fear to them. And the step process got me to the point where I understood myself enough to know that I thrive on natural ways. Like I've been a gardener for 30 years. I am extremely connected to nature.

Lydia (1h 22m 26s):
I don't know how not to be simple, compassionate, and those principles towards nature and allow nature to be that way. For me, like there was a certain exchange when I showed up to your house to take care of your land, you know, it was about stewardship and it's about balance. And it's about, it's about diversity. It's about having an open mind. The use of chemicals is a closed mind is saying that nothing else will work. Right? So here I was at this, I want to say jumping off place with my horse where, you know, my friend, I won't mention his name, but he's the kind of guy that goes, you have to do this.

Lydia (1h 23m 15s):
You have to make them, you've got to use, you know, you've got to dominate, you've got to show them. Who's the boss. And none of that would ever resonate with me. I don't even make my dog do anything, but sit, when she supposed to, you know, like it's time to eat, sit like you was your kids sit. I want you to sit to eat, not walk around my mother before she died was like, promise me that you and your husband will sit me. And I was like, that's a big ask mom. But what happened when I started to realize that I was back in the horses, even before I had my own, they were someone else's ranch horses that I had to gain trust very quickly.

Lydia (1h 24m 1s):
Just like I would a person new in recovery who has just stopped drinking and has absolutely no way to cope or self-regulate in order to have a conversation with me. So I had to show up and just be with them. And I had to meet their physical and their intrinsic needs in a very short process. And that is when I found you, who practiced the Dallas and with horses. And it wasn't what you said in your videos. It was how you work with them. And for me, it was an easy translation to take. It was an easy step to take. It was not complicated.

Lydia (1h 24m 41s):
It was scary because of the expanse of your knowledge, all the way up to level, whatever of dressage. And I didn't, I don't have any training. I've never had anybody teach me how to ride. I'm self-taught, you know, all those things that developed naturally to the movement of the horse, to the movement of the horse back, so on and so forth. So I was at a place where I wasn't willing to compromise my feelings or feeling of, and for the horse itself, like no matter what somebody expected or said that I should do, I questioned honestly, if there was a different way and easier, softer way, like when, when we first come into alcoholics anonymous or Alanon the first thing we tell you is this is the easier, softer way, because there's a guide, you know, like Lao-Tzu says, there is a guide and the guide is learning to do suit up, show up and do the next right thing.

Lydia (1h 25m 51s):
So it's like, don't drink no matter what, go to a meeting, call my sponsor, read the book. So I already had that built into me when I found you, but what it really did was delivered the message on a real physical cellular level. It was like, if I do this, I'm going to get that. Wow. And it was in incremental ways, just like the step work that I had to do to understand myself, to even know, like, what is the next right thing? According to Lydia, like, what is today known self be true mean I've been doing sex, drugs, alcohol, whatever.

Lydia (1h 26m 36s):
I could exercise to avoid how I felt or why I felt the way I did, because it didn't match what other people were saying and how they felt this sense sort of. So yeah,

Caroline Beste (1h 26m 49s):
He passes behaviors. Absolutely.

Lydia (1h 26m 52s):
You started from the very beginning with us and it was about trust and through trust, I get to have lived simply I get to have compassion and I also get to have flow. Like I trust the flow of things. I don't have to question them or understand them. I just have to accept them. And then I like Lao Sue. One of the things that really struck me when I started to work on my notes was there was not a verse where I didn't find something that the program of recovery has already delivered to me in a short sentence. Like he like this too. Shall pass. Let go and let go.

Caroline Beste (1h 27m 32s):
Lydia. I wonder if the book, the AA book that the guys wrote, I wonder if they study Taoism. I wonder if they brought, because it is so close to zoo and I swear the little bit that I'm learning through you. It is, it

Lydia (1h 27m 50s):
It's crazy thing is really crazy thing is the founders were touched by a man who left the Oxford group. One of the most staunch Christian religions that you can come from. And, but they knew, they knew the alcoholic mind that it's stubborn, it's closed, it's opinionated. It wants what it wants. And it's in the coping mechanism of, I want more, that's what makes me feel better. Or I want, if it's a horse, I want more of them. If it's a drink, I want more of them. If it's candy, I want more of it. You know, that imbalance of everything.

Lydia (1h 28m 30s):
So for me, yeah. So for me it was, it was an easy buy-in and I say buy in because through the inventory process of self-discovery and how I got so lost for myself in the first place was that I realized that if you told me something, I would buy in to it, right? Like I'll buy into it just to get along with you. And I realized that I raised raised a, in a way that I didn't want,

Caroline Beste (1h 29m 3s):
That's a lack of boundaries. I think that's also in my experience with a lot of coaching is also just you weren't taught boundaries. It was this, this openness that, that, and it's also family dynamic because our parents reinforce these behaviors, these learned behaviors. But I think it's such a boundary thing. It's not that you buy into it. You're way too smart. And you are very grounded intuitively when you listen to yourself, you're amazing with that with you

Lydia (1h 29m 31s):
Through the process of outside world. I started to question that and doubt it, right? Yeah. Because nobody grabbed me in school and said, you're dyslexic and you think differently. I did not know why I thought differently. I did not know why I did not fit in. I just knew that when I said don't kick an anthill because that's a living community. So bizarre and strange. And I was like, look at how they operate. They are more organized and civilized than we are as a civilization, they cooperate together. They function. And I got my, I was standing over the sand hill with my boyfriend in the seventh grade and he kicked it and blew it all over the place.

Lydia (1h 30m 17s):
And I pushed him down. I knocked him over and pushed him down. I was like, no, do that with me. Or I will treat you the same way you just treated them. So for me, it was, it was one of those things. And then when I started to actually realize through your understanding horses, the language of Equis and what a certain movement, or even a blink or a Twitch of the mouth, or, you know, just the cocking of the foot, there's some things that you have to know because that's what a horse looks like. But there's so many suggestions between those.

Lydia (1h 30m 59s):
Like, there's so many things they tell you between what they're telling you. It's real. So once you start listening, you guys get over flooded by the expression, like me going to the parade and just the horses going by me and knowing that I understood them. Yes, they stopped. And they heard me understand what that was. They didn't stop and look at anybody else, you know? And John was sitting with meeting people, but for whatever reason, those horses stopped and had a conversation with me because they knew I was listening. Yeah. And you can even say, I can't do anything about it, but I feel for you, I feel great.

Lydia (1h 31m 44s):
And so on that, on that note, like I had to get rid of the suggestions that people you could, you should, or you would, you know, I had to lose that from myself in order to find it with my horse. There cannot be any I should have could, as in woods with my horse, they're just

Caroline Beste (1h 32m 6s):
Like

Lydia (1h 32m 6s):
Suit up, show up and do what they're asking me to do and,

Caroline Beste (1h 32m 12s):
And take the path, the resistance. I think that's key for people. It's so we don't sound too esoteric. And a lot of this, you guys it's like, well, how do you get something done? Or how do you, you just, you take the path of least resistance. It doesn't have to be a fight. It doesn't have to be a struggle. And often the horses, when you're, you know, they present the struggle, just like we do. Often they present the struggle. I call them, they, they come with challenges just like we do until they realize that they don't have to struggle anymore until they realize that you're going to stay right where you are until they finished what they have to finish. And you're still right there. The same person, the same space, the same energy, the same heart, the same intention they're done.

Caroline Beste (1h 32m 55s):
And they go, well, the horse, just like, what am I fighting? What am I fighting? What am I fighting?

Lydia (1h 33m 2s):
Yeah. And you know, the example, one of the perfect examples is when the trencher was in my yard with a worker behind it, and he was going towards my horse and my horse jumped over the gate and landed on his side with his feet in the gate. And I looked at him and I said, don't you move? I'm coming. And it stopped everything. He stopped. I stopped. The only thing that hadn't stopped was the trencher. And as soon as it stopped, I said, okay, coach, I'm ready. Are you ready? And I unclipped the only thing that was holding the gate up and he took his one foot and punched the gate toward me to get us free and stood up.

Lydia (1h 33m 43s):
And I was like, oh my God, did that just happen?

Caroline Beste (1h 33m 47s):
Yeah. Amazing.

Lydia (1h 33m 48s):
Same with the baby. You know, he's been persistently. He kind of digresses to old behavior before I got him that I'm gregarious. I'm going to play with you. I'm going to bite at you. And there was no calm and yeah, just like Jeaneen in the, in the action of non-action, he is been transformed into a soft, sweet, loving,

Caroline Beste (1h 34m 25s):
And you haven't done anything with them. You haven't done a technique specific technique or gone after him or made him feel bad or punish them or pressure and release all this BS to teach them not to do it.

Lydia (1h 34m 40s):
If anything, I might have, you know, I might take the arm away. So he can't bite it. Like you got up. And when you want to come up to me, without that, you can come up to me. And that is all I have. And that got us to a certain point. But when I really left it alone and let him be, for whatever reason, my older horse started to let him bite him on the butt. Cause he finally found that place of how much biting is. Okay.

Caroline Beste (1h 35m 10s):
Yeah. What's appropriate. Yes.

Lydia (1h 35m 12s):
Yeah. And so now he's doing that with Coachise. He's like, let me do that to you. And I'm like, no, you can do that to him, but not with me yet.

Caroline Beste (1h 35m 22s):
Yes, yes. And the intention has changed. So this is where people say, people say, oh my, this take profit. For example, my young horse doesn't respect me and I need to teach them respect. And it's like, no, wait a minute. You can easily redirect this behavior in so many ways. And that's what you're talking about in Coachise. I always let my animals show me with, with a young animal, whether it was my dogs with a young dog or my cats with a young cat or my horses with a young horse, I let them when I trust them. And I know they're healthy guys. I let them tell me if that they'll say biting is appropriate and cookies would never let him come into a space because he knew the baby didn't understand.

Caroline Beste (1h 36m 4s):
And he brought the wrong intention into the bite and Coachise wanted to teach them that you can't just bite me to bite me. That's not acceptable. And that's the way horses are. And you just told them the same thing. But now that he's learning how to just learning how to be off in a horse dynamic and a human dynamic. So often these young horses are taken away so young and they don't have the right influence to teach them like the mama would for two years or the wild herd would for years teach them how to act. You guys, this is really important. And so these young horses come with all these displaced behaviors and, and it's, you know, we've talked about this, Lydia prophet sounds like he didn't socially.

Caroline Beste (1h 36m 49s):
It wasn't very well socialized. And yeah, he didn't have a good mama that that would allow him to be appropriate, figuring out his boundaries and then she'd show him what wasn't appropriate at that time. Or for whatever reason. And Coachise is now. Like you're getting it profit. Now you can bite me and play with me because you're you have the right mindset. It's just,

Lydia (1h 37m 17s):
And so I went out to let them out. They Coachise always comes in, allows for me to put my hand on his, whether something that you taught us, right. And to the partner, walked to the bait gate, the baby used to rush around to get behind him. And now he'll look at me for permission to get in that spot. And we'll go to the gate. And this morning I have now made added one thing on, I kiss everybody before they go through the gate and the baby doesn't want to wait for that. But Coachise, now we'll say to the baby, we're not going through the gate until I get that kiss remarks.

Lydia (1h 37m 57s):
He looked at me and I was like, he forgot that I wanted the kiss. And he started to back up profit, you know, because it's a kiss. And then he backs prophet up and then I can swing the gate open toward them. And they have plenty of time and room to get through it without hurting each other or anybody. Right. So it's teaching that little baby in increments that it's the patients you've got to wait. Yeah. Just the,

Caroline Beste (1h 38m 23s):
In that patients, you're teaching him respect. He's learning how to respect it. It also works. It's crazy how sometimes the simplest of, of actions can, can have this beautiful domino effect is teaching some other things

Lydia (1h 38m 40s):
I'm not teaching in patients, but what he's getting is patients because they're behind, they're going, oh no, this is not acceptable. We're not waiting open that gate. And he'd be going.

Caroline Beste (1h 38m 50s):
So we'll be though, that's the Louie. Yep. So may students ask me, Caroline, my horse won't stand still. And I'm like, it will come. It will come. Don't make it happen. Don't force it to happen.

Lydia (1h 39m 5s):
I came when I was in non-action of training. Yeah. It came when I took two weeks off because of a bone implant.

Caroline Beste (1h 39m 11s):
There you go.

Lydia (1h 39m 13s):
Thank God.

Caroline Beste (1h 39m 14s):
God

Lydia (1h 39m 16s):
Slows me down because you seen it. Doesn't you know, and finally I get it, you know, like, oh, I broke my leg. So now I can't do anything. But stand here and do this. And we're haulers.

Caroline Beste (1h 39m 27s):
Yes. Everything has it's it's it's it's a reason. Or it's its way. Well, listen, I'm going to wrap this up and let us know you guys, if you want us, we would love to do a part two, but whatever we we'll be back in July. I haven't, I don't remember what the date is. I think it is. No, I don't know. We have another author that we're going to be inter not interviewing, but as a guest speaker and this author, I sh I did not copy this. You guys, I think it's the 13th of July, this author, Carol Whitney.

Caroline Beste (1h 40m 8s):
I think it's something that sold to the horse, wrote a beautiful book. And her husband is Larry, the cable guy in this call. So he's retired obviously. And they bought this beautiful farm out west, somewhere near you, Lydia, where it's beautiful and open. And so she's going to be our guest speaker on the 13th talk. Hopefully I have to confirm that with them. Hopefully it'll show up.

Lydia (1h 40m 33s):
That is awesome. I have one more thing to say about what you read and it's just very in, and it's about water. And in, in our program, I hear often water seeks its own level. So check your check yourself if you're not where you want to be. Right. Ooh.

Caroline Beste (1h 40m 50s):
And Mike, that water seeks its own level. Yeah, that is beautiful. Thank you. The metaphor of water. All right. Well thank you everyone. Thank you. Guests speakers today, ladies and we are going to continue this summer. I'm spending time with my mom. She's here all summer and you know, more, more family time in stepping back from, I'm not sitting back from work. I'm just working differently, but we'll have some new stuff coming out with the Dell horsemanship, a whole new website, hopefully in July and with it on new Facebook page.

Caroline Beste (1h 41m 31s):
So we're excited because we, the three of us and a couple of other students of the Tao of Horsemanship, we will all be involved in the new, the new Facebook, which is going to be really cool. Cause we're going to be expanding on these philosophies and teachings as a collective group and sharing it with all of you so we can look forward to that this summer. All right. Well, thank you, ladies. Have a great day and I will catch up with you guys. I love you. Both take care of you guys and love by everybody. God bless. May you always be one with your horse and let us know what you thought about this.

Caroline Beste (1h 42m 11s):
Okay. All right. Bye.