Elizabeth Gil –Venezuelan –Stubborn Optimist –Refugee Descendant

Elizabeth is a leap first kinda woman. She is a granddaughter of Spanish refugees and an immigrant from Venezuela at 18, leaving her family behind. With no English but driven by a dream, her positive mindset makes it work. She is stubborn. Failure is “a first attempt in learning.” Strong women and gentle men shaped her view. Her North Star is always choosing kindness. Her story of misunderstanding her husband’s real name until he proposed is so her is a chuckle. Elizabeth shares her view on how empowerment through education works for her. Her parenting philosophy is that children are only “borrowed” for a while, which is unique.
You will feel the energy of personality in the audio.

Elizabeth Gil Bio
I was born and raised in Venezuela, and I have always felt like I belong to “the in between” as my family is from Spain originally, and the goal was to return there someday. I was raised by very strong women, which made me fearless, and I was protected by two incredibly strong men who showed me that the only limits were within myself. I came to Canada at 18 to learn English, and I keep arguing that I am still working at it, so I can’t leave. I met my soulmate soon after arriving, and he has been my rock and my refuge in sickness and in health; we have weathered fierce storms and have become a safe harbour for each other, and I would choose him again in any future lives. I have two courageous, funny, and authentic younger humans who let me walk beside them not only as a mom but also as a friend. I have two precious heirlooms: my grandmother’s ring and a pendant made by a friend’s dad that carried healing vibes. I am an amateur goldsmith, an avid reader, an archer, and I almost got arrested in Spain when I was pregnant for disrupting a police raid. 

About Mark Laurie - Host.
Mark has been transforming how women see themselves, enlarging their sense of sexy, and expanding their confidence in an exciting adventure that is transformational photography.
http://innerspiritphotography.com
https://www.instagram.com/innerspiritphotography/

Sound Production by:
Lee Ellis  - myofficemedia@gmail.com

Transcript

🎙️ Episode Summary & Show Notes

Note: the full word-for-word transcript is found at the end of this summary & show notes. 

Description:

In this episode of Fascinating Women, host Mark Laurie sits down with Elizabeth Gil to explore the roots of her infectious positivity and iron-clad resilience. From her 18-year-old "leap of faith" from Venezuela to Canada to her professional life in counselling and education, Elizabeth shares how her heritage as a refugee's granddaughter has shaped her adaptable mindset. She discusses the humorous side of language barriers—including the "John/Sean" marriage proposal—and offers profound insights into redefining failure as a "First Attempt In Learning." This conversation is a masterclass in self-compassion, the power of stubbornness, and finding identity in the spaces between cultures.

Key Keywords:

• Resilience and Positivity
• Women's Empowerment Stories
• Immigrant Experience Canada
• Redefining Failure (F.A.I.L.)
• Venezuelan Cultural Resilience

3 Core Takeaways:

1. Laughter as Survival: How the Venezuelan culture uses humour to navigate even the darkest tragedies.
2. The "FAIL" Mindset: Transforming the fear of failure into a "First Attempt In Learning."
3. Parenting as a Partnership: The philosophy of "borrowing" children rather than moulding them into "mini-me's."

📝 SEO-Optimized Transcript

Introduction: The Energy of Positivity

Host Mark Laurie welcomes Elizabeth Gil to Fascinating Women, noting her incredible life force and resilience in the face of tragedy.

The Three Keys to Resilience

Elizabeth identifies her core traits as stubbornness (the drive to get things done), positivity (a cultural trait from Venezuela where laughter is a survival tool), and friendliness.

An Immigrant's Mindset

Leaving Venezuela at 18 for Canada was an adventure rooted in her family history. As a descendant of Spanish refugees, she learned early not to attach to one place but to make wherever she is "home."

The Influence of Strong Women and Gentle Men

Elizabeth attributes her survival instincts to her grandmother, an orphan at 10. She describes her home life as a balance between "raising voices" with her mother and finding a space for conversation and different perspectives with her gentle father.

The "Octopus" Date and the Language Barrier

Elizabeth shares humorous anecdotes about arriving in Canada with very little English, from not understanding a 5-year-old on a bus to nearly eating octopus on a date with her future husband because she couldn't read the menu.

Redefining Success and Failure (F.A.I.L.)

Success is defined as being at peace with having tried your best. She shares a powerful acronym for failure learned in the school system: F.A.I.L. — First Attempt In Learning.

The "John" Who Never Was

Elizabeth tells the story of accepting a marriage proposal from a man she thought was named "John" due to his accent, only to discover a month later his name was actually Sean.

Guiding Beliefs: Kindness and Borrowed Time

Her "North Star" beliefs include choosing kindness, trying everything once, and the parental philosophy that children are only "borrowed" for a while.

Education as a Tool for Empowerment

Driven by her father’s example and her mother’s wishes, Elizabeth pursued her Master’s degree—motivated partly by a desire to stand her ground after an argument with a former boss.

Faith and the Human Condition

Elizabeth reflects on a childhood moment of standing up to nuns at her Catholic school, leading to her current "esoteric" view of a higher power and a guiding light centered on leaving the world better than she found it.

Finding Meaning and Identity

Meaning is found in her family, her counseling work, and her animals. She now identifies as a blend of all her influences: Venezuelan, Canadian, and Spanish.

🎥 Social Media & Authority Assets

Authority Insight: This episode reinforces Mark Laurie’s authority in women’s empowerment by highlighting the Radical Adaptability of the female spirit. By showcasing Elizabeth's transition from an immigrant in "no-man's land" to a confident professional, Mark positions his brand as the premier space for transformative stories of growth.

Top Pull Quotes:

• "Stubbornness gets that drive to get things done."
• "Failure is your First Attempt In Learning."
• "If you get to choose, be kind, always."

Full word for word transcript. 

Mark Laurie: Hello everyone, and welcome to Fascinating Women. Today, I’ve got Elizabeth Gil, and she’s got some fascinating stories. She’s really a cool individual; you’ll be hard-pressed to find someone who’s got more life and big smiles—I tell you, it’s really incredible. So, welcome to our show.

Elizabeth Gil: Hi Mark, thank you for having me.

Mark Laurie: So, let’s dig right into it. You are one of the most positive people I’ve seen; even with some of the tragedy you’ve had in your life, you still kind of come on top. What three characteristics take you through life this way?

Elizabeth Gil: Um, well one is I’m stubborn. Which, I know most people see it as a bad thing, but I think it gets that drive to get things done. And then, I try to see hope and positivity on everything. And that comes from being a Venezuelan; we are able to make jokes and laugh at even the biggest tragedies because, if you get stuck, then you are there—you’ll never advance, you never move. And I think the last one is... I am very friendly, and I have been very lucky to find many wonderful people in my path that have really helped me to move along and just take that opportunity.

Mark Laurie: So, how old were you when you left Venezuela?

Elizabeth Gil: I was 18. I had just finished high school, and I told my parents, "I'm going to Canada for a year of ESL (English as a Second Language)." Which was the plan—that you are coming back. I keep arguing with my parents to this day, "Yeah, I still don't speak English, so I need to stay in Canada a little longer".

Mark Laurie: I mean, that’s a leap. Usually, when people are leaving a country, it’s from super dire circumstances. You’re a bit more... "this stage in my life." What kind of things in your early childhood would have shaped you to have the mindset that this is a good adventure?

Elizabeth Gil: Well, I think in part it’s because I’m the daughter and granddaughter of immigrants and refugees. In a sense, my grandparents had to escape Spain because they were in the "wrong zone" with a little baby. And it was always that sense of: "Don’t set roots here because we are going back at some point." So, it was that ability to say, "Okay, if I need to go to somewhere else, I need to make it home." So, it was that—I’m not attached to one place but I’m willing to see what it brings. And I think that made the difference to help me to be here afterwards.

Mark Laurie: Did your parents affect you differently when growing up?

Elizabeth Gil: Yes. Yes. I come from a line of very strong women whose husbands thought, "We are the one directing the show," and then it’s like, "No, no, it’s the woman directing the show." Let’s put that clear. Especially my grandmother—she was an orphan by age 10 or 11, I think. Then she had to figure out how to make things work and be very secure on herself and know that this is how you survive. So I think I got that from her; of like, just whatever you do, you are going to make errors—it's fine, you're going to survive, keep going.

And then my mom and I are very similar, but in the opposite directions. So the arguments were famous in my house because you could hear the two of us just raising voices—Latin women, voices go up! But at the same time, it was like, "Don't give up. Just hold your ground. Don't get scared". And then with my dad... my dad is more gentle. My dad is the quiet one. So with him, it was more of: "You don't have to be fighting for absolutely everything. You can come and talk and be in a space where I will hear you." And that shaped me too—to not need to be arguing constantly. There is a way to just converse and see the other person's perspective and still be able to hold your ground.

Mark Laurie: So you’ve left... was that kind of an adventure going from Venezuela? How well did you speak English then?

Elizabeth Gil: It was an adventure because I spoke very little. In my mind, I had done high school—we had been doing English as a second language in school since Grade 1. And I used to get pretty good marks, so like, "Easy peasy, I got this." I got here... we arrived in Calgary at night, took the Greyhound bus to go down to Lethbridge the next morning. And I had a little kid, probably five or six, sitting beside me. And the kid starts talking and I’m like, "I don't know what you are saying." Like, "Oh... oh my god, I’m in trouble now." I know nothing. That was the first realization of like: "This might be a little more challenging than I thought it was going to be."

Elizabeth Gil: And then I became very apt when I was in university because I was able to order from the cafeteria as part of our meal plan like, "Okay, I recognize that word and that word—that's all that I'm eating because I know what those two words mean."

Mark Laurie: Photographs must have helped a lot. "That plate."

Elizabeth Gil: Exactly! Until I decided to go to the Chinese restaurant that was atop of the university and like... they have no pictures. They just have numbers and names. And I ordered, like, "Let’s try it," and all of a sudden it’s octopus. I’m like, "How do you eat this?" And I was on a date, kind of, with who is my husband today! I’m like, "I'm not hungry. I don't need to eat it," because I couldn't figure out how I was going to go about this.

Mark Laurie: It takes a certain amount of fierceness to leap in the deep end that far. Most people look for excuses; you look for reasons to go forward. With that, how do you define success and failure?

Elizabeth Gil: Success is being able to be content and at peace with yourself with what you have tried. Whether you did it 100% right, 50% right, 10% right—you tried it. There is no the regret of "I left it on the table, I didn't try my best."

Elizabeth Gil: And failure... I think it has changed because working in the school system, I had a teacher that said "Failure is your First Attempt In Learning." And it’s something that I work with the kids: "Yeah, it’s a mistake, it’s not quite what I would have liked to happen to me—okay, next time maybe I'll do it differently." And trying not to let it drag me down because then, again, instead of learning, you are stuck in that spot.

Mark Laurie: An instructor one time said everyone who is now an expert started off with a huge failure, and the only difference was going forward. So, you met your husband; how did that language thing work?

Elizabeth Gil: Oh, that was entertaining. The long story short was it was my third or fourth day here in Canada and I went to ask for help with one of my assignments. I went to one of the other girls' rooms to say, "I don't know what they are asking me." And he happened to be... there was this very gorgeous guy talking to this girl. I remember I looked at the two of them and I’m like, "I'll be right back," and I left because I felt so jealous! Like, from everything—cartoon-like, almost—and like, "Please, please, please tell me that you are the sister because if not, I'm going to need to find a place to hide the body, cause I like him, I want him."

Elizabeth Gil: So we start talking. And all of a sudden I hear him say, "Hi, my name is John." Or, and his name is Sean. But in my Spanish ears, I’m like, "Oh, John. Okay, he has an accent." And when I say his name, it’s like, "She has an accent. No problem."

Elizabeth Gil: A month later, he’s like, "Will you marry me?" And I had said yes. And then I see his ID card and I’m like, "Your name is S-E-A-N? Like Sean Connery? Not John?" He’s like, "I thought it was your accent!" Like, "No, I thought it was your accent!" So yes, I had said yes to marry a "John" that never existed, so now it’s Sean.

Mark Laurie: That's a story I've never heard before—marrying the man you didn't know! What beliefs guide you? Name three beliefs that are your North Star.

Elizabeth Gil: Kindness will be the first one. If you get to choose, be kind, always, because you don’t know what’s coming behind the person. And sometimes those hard words, those very negative reactions, stay with them very long.

Elizabeth Gil: Then is: Try everything. Good, bad, in the middle—give it a shot. Because there is always something to learn from it.

Elizabeth Gil: And as a mom, the hardest belief has been: I am only borrowing these kids for a while. They are not "mini-me's," and they are their own version. My job is just to be there to hold them back and then push if they need.

Mark Laurie: You appear to be a driven person. You've left Venezuela, shaped up a life, got married pretty quickly... now you're into a Master's in Psychology? Where did you get that drive to learn?

Elizabeth Gil: My dad, again. When I was really little, he was working on his undergrad during the nighttime as he was working during daytime. And I was very sick as a baby, so it was always hearing him—he would have the book and trying to put me to sleep as he’s trying to memorize whatever he’s working on for school. I respected that passion, that drive. And then, I’m curious, so I want to know.

Elizabeth Gil: And the Master’s, to be honest, came out of a very angry place. One of the things my mom always said was, "I want you to have your Master’s," because she didn't have the chance to go to school as a young person. And I said, "Yeah, I'll do my Master’s later."

Elizabeth Gil: And then I got into an argument with an ex-boss and I remember: "I'm done. I'm not putting up with this." So I actually had seen the ads for the Master’s program and I parked the car on the side of the road and I made the phone call. Anger is a big motivator!

Mark Laurie: Some people dwell in research and look into things, but you strike me as a spontaneous decision-maker who trusts your instinct.

Elizabeth Gil: My plan is I’ll hit the ground running and hopefully I don’t get enough scratches as I go through. If it is, it can be fixed. Let’s go.

Mark Laurie: Has that approach ever backfired on you?

Elizabeth Gil: Yeah. In high school, I got into a lot of trouble. I used to go to a Catholic school run by Spanish nuns. One day I see a vehicle like my mom’s with the driver's side door smashed. I run back to the school to ask for the phone and the nun said, "No, the phone is for business." I was terrified thinking, "Is my mom okay?" I walked home, my mom was fine, but I was so angry. The next day I went to school and I told the nun, "I really like Jesus, but I don’t like Christians very much," and I left the room.

Mark Laurie: So now, do you still like Jesus but dislike the middle-of-the-road Christians? Where did you land?

Elizabeth Gil: I think I’m more esoteric at this point. My belief is there is some sort of higher power above us. But the guiding light should always be: leave this place in a better state than you found it. If you cannot change anything, don’t make it worse.

Mark Laurie: Where do you find meaning in your life?

Elizabeth Gil: I find it in my family. I have two very smart young people showing me to always be fearless. I find it at work, both in the school system—getting to know the stories behind the kids—and with counseling. It’s usually people who come in the worst moment of their lives and are kind enough to invite me into their world.

Mark Laurie: Do you see yourself as a Venezuelan who is in Canada, or a Canadian who came from Venezuela?

Elizabeth Gil: When I first came, I never felt Venezuelan. When we went to Spain to see family, they said I had an accent, so I wasn't Spanish. I was in this "no-man's land." Today, I am all three. I am a Venezuelan-Canadian-Spanish. It’s all part of who I am.

Mark Laurie: What are you curious about these days?

Elizabeth Gil: I love people. I like to know what makes them go and react and do the things they do. My favorite question is: "What’s the best part of your job? What moves you?"

Mark Laurie: How do you want to change the world?

Elizabeth Gil: I want people to just be able to lessen that very heavy backpack they carry with guilt and shame. To create a little more self-compassion. The fact that you are a living, breathing person makes you enough. That would be what I want to change so they can experience more happiness instead of constant suffering.

Mark Laurie: Elizabeth, thank you for joining us today.

Elizabeth Gil: Thank you for having me, Mark.