184:October Special #3: Handsome Women & Big Nattys

The Murder Of Peter Fabiano. 

With Sarah in the background, Megan (with guest stars Nutbar and TT Queen Of The Pee Hive) created this shitshow of an episode about a horrible Halloween murder.  AI tried to create some sense of it below....

Have you ever wondered how Taylor Swift's 'Invisible String' connects to Anne Lamott's narrative or pondered about the happenings of the 1950s?  And, oh yes, we also attempt to decode the mysterious relationship between Peter Fabiano and Joan Rable which ended in a chilling Halloween horror. We aim to keep you on the edge of your anus  as we revisit the chilling murder of Peter Fabiano. A tale of manipulation, betrayal, and an eerie clown costume.

Listen at your own risk!

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

The following podcast contains adult themes and adult language. Listener discretion advised. And, although we joke, if you or someone you know is affected by or a victim of domestic violence, dial 1-800-799-7233 or visit the National Domestic Violence Hotline's website, thehotlineorg. It's always the hook baby. It's always the hook baby. It's always the hook baby. I don't keep it. Hi, you're listening to. It's Always the Husband podcast. This is Megan and this is Nutt Bar and this is the Queen of the Peahive, otherwise known as TT, tt, welcome.

Speaker 1: 0:48

We are recording this week without Sarah, who is mourning the loss of her father. He's going to be buried tomorrow at Fort Snelling with a military. What is it called? A 21 gun salute or something, we don't know, but I think it's something like that, and so she didn't feel very funny and it's understandable. It is, it's understandable.

Speaker 1: 1:12

We got a really raging angry review on we did on whatever iTunes or something, and someone gave us a one why? And they said, yeah, that we were garbage and that we didn't even research. We only watch one show and then talk about it and we make fun of everyone. Has this person ever listened to a podcast before? I don't know, but she was very angry and she said I know one of the families or something that you were talking about and you, I don't know. At first my heart got a little hurt because I'm very sensitive, but then I was like fuck off, bitch. Of course we only watch one show. Yeah, who is time to research anything? We work at the fucking deodorant factory. No, no, that's our shtick. We watch a show that has bad reenactments and ugly wigs and then we make fun of everyone. Do we make fun of the victims? Sometimes? Yes, I mean when, only when they deserve it, like really bad hair or something. It is a lot about the hair. Yeah, I am sorry. So we weren't for her, but that one star rating will remain. It'll really bring down all your high ones too. It really will. They average. Now we're going to have a 4.7 or something Whatever.

Speaker 1: 2:47

So, thanks for listening. We're glad you're here and we have a Patreon. What? Oh, it's true, we have one Patreon. Her name is Susan Shantz. Susan, yes, I thought I would pretend like I was my sister and I would do her part. Yeah, susan took a Shantz on us. Oh, she can't sell me. She took a Shantz and she donated to our podcast monthly. So thank you, susan. Thank you, susan, do I sound like you? Yeah, you actually do, kind of.

Speaker 1: 3:34

Eric asked was going to be mad because he said I can't tell the difference between not Barron, megan, seriously, yeah, can you tell the difference between us 100%? Yeah, so could everyone else. All of my friends can too. Hmm, do you want to tell them what you told me on our drunken practical magic night? A special festivity that's coming up in our life.

Speaker 1: 4:00

Do I remember what I told you on our drunken practical magic night? It was about our choir teacher, ms Murphy, is having a big birthday and it's the day after the Queen of the Peaheibs wedding. So we're going to be super hungover and we are going to drive down to our hometown and we are going to hopefully have Ms Murphy lead us in the singing of hopefully. This is the moment, my final test, my test, never second best. I won't look down. Don't forget to shine. That sounds horrific. I mean, you sounded lovely, but that being hungover and singing yeah, because you will be you both will be Totally hungover singing, oh for sure. What if we puke on the bleachers? Well, it would be reminiscent of high school for you. It sure would. Sorry, ms Murphy. Sarah is so mad right now, because she tells us every time don't talk about that, try not shit. And what was the first thing we talked about? Well, we have Trimon originals here right now. So I'm from Trimon too, but I hate Trimon. I have no interest in going there.

Speaker 1: 5:32

The Queen of the Pee Hive is from our tiny little town and that's where we fell in love. That's where the magic started. That was the magic, yeah, but I got out. I got out at 12 and never looked back. But the Queen here is getting married very soon, in just a few weeks.

Speaker 1: 5:55

Three, two, two, no, wait, three, november 4th, I think it's three. It's three. I think it's two and a half. She's so scared now. It is two and a half. Yeah, oh my gosh. Okay, that means Lil' Rebsie has to work on her sermon this weekend. That's right. Cassie is marrying me and Megan is the bridesmaid, and Megan needs to pick out her reading. That she's sure to say she's going to do, whether Tiffany wants it or not.

Speaker 1: 6:29

Do you want something from the Bible? Oh, no, no, I do not. I'm going to find the perfect poem for you. Oh, my god, yes. Or maybe a Taylor Swift lyric Absolutely, an invisible string tied. What is that song, I don't know, like invisible string. Okay, okay, I am having a moment now because I love that song. Yes, oh, that was beautiful. But you're going to get a suit by T-Swift that's invisible. Oh, shoot, taylor, don't so? Modest brewery in Minneapolis that makes really awesome beer.

Speaker 1: 7:12

I just bought a beer called Invisible String and the whole time I was thinking it was the story that Anne Lamott tells of the people with the Invisible String. Remember when she told that story, when we listened to her? Yeah, kind of. I can't remember what it means or what it is, but that's what I thought it was about and I was like, oh, my god, modest is so smart. No, it's about Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift, sorry, oopsies. Well, I'm going to look up the lyrics, because I think that you and Dana had an invisible string, oh, really Tying you together. Maybe, maybe, something is the color it's called Invisible String. Yeah, purple, I don't know, but anyway, it's going to be great.

Speaker 1: 7:58

So why don't you sing it? Oh, no, claire can accompany you on guitar. That's my daughter. No, yes, this is not going to be good. Why Is it turning into a circus? Do you think I can't sing? No, I just think it'll be a shit show. If it's two and a half weeks out and you haven't even tried. I mean, this is how we roll. This wedding is not a joke. No, this wedding is not a joke. This wedding is not a joke. This is not a joke, but it is totally a joke. It's only. Do you feel like that's funny for everyone, or is it just funny for us? It is. Let's move on Like Little Rev. See is the efficient. I'm this 47-year-old bride's maid.

Speaker 1: 8:42

I told my director, or my boss at the deodorant factory that I was not going to be able to come to school one day before because I was going to have to go to the rehearsal. Yeah, and he said. I said, I know, you didn't know that I was a little, I was a reverend, but I am. And he goes oh, you sound like that grandma that comes in and tells us she's a minister every time she's drunk. What? There's a drunk grandma at the deodorant factory, apparently, why is she there? She comes in and yells at everybody and gets mad when she's drunk and tells everybody that she's a minister. Why is she coming to school drunk? Oh, my God At all, why is she coming to school at all? I don't know. Sounds like somebody needs to put her on a hold. Yes, yes, indeed, I think so too.

Speaker 1: 9:35

Ok, any glitters in the shitter for you guys this week? Yes, I have some. What is it? Lil Rev C. Lil Rev C has the Wiley Wallaby Licorice candy.

Speaker 1: 9:49

That is good. Oh my, it's really good. Yeah, and I don't really like licorice. Ok, so you got some from Miss Shana and Miss Holly at Shana's Dance Studio, the greatest dance studio on the planet. Of course, it comes in multiple flavors. I got from them lemonade, pomegranate, blueberry, green apple and raspberry or something like that. Licorice it's the softest and it comes in little short, like two inch sticks of thick licorice and it tastes good and it's soft as can be and the flavors are amazing. The lemonade is to die for.

Speaker 1: 10:28

I second that, it's true, and I don't even really like sweets. You don't even like candy. No, where do you buy it? I got it on Amazon and it is ridiculously expensive, but it is worth the money. Usually, I like peanut m&m's a lot and salted nut rolls. Well, if you want something chewy and sweet but you like the nerd thing Sweet, I do like nerd gummies you would like this, but I can only eat like two before it hurts me. That's all you have to eat your teeth, all right, tt. So my glitter in the shitter could actually turn out to be a horrible shitter. I'm not sure it's something I'm looking for. It could be a diarrhea in an outhouse. I could be depressed for months after this.

Speaker 1: 11:08

But I am going to a store as you all know we live in Minnesota from our barely detectable accents, barely and it's called Nani Nalu and it is a swimsuit store and you send in your, make an appointment, you send in your measurements and they find swimsuits for you. And I have a naturally large breasts, so it's very hard for me to find. They're a naturally natural. Yeah, they're, they are, and they've already been reduced once they're big naturals I do. I got some big Natties and so we're going to try to contain them. So I sent in all my measurements, my sizes, and then they're going to find the suits for me. And yes, but it's an actual physical store. Yes, but they carry like a huge variety and so they'll find stuff that works my body type.

Speaker 1: 11:57

I told them my problem areas. Can they find swimsuits that fit long sacks of boobs? Like someone else in this room? I would? Oh my God. So you're not speaking about yourself. Oh shit, that was a sick burn. I don't know. I'll ask them. Oh, that even got Gans laughing, winning. I can't even see it, it's so disgusting. Thanks a lot. Okay, thanks for everyone. But I'm sure they could find something to cover a large gunk that keeps growing every day and sacks of boobs, a tube sock with a marble in the end. That's what I've heard people describe there. Other people have just not your boobs, their own boobs.

Speaker 1: 12:55

I was going to fight someone. No, it wasn't me. It wasn't me, it wasn't All right. So I don't have a fucking glitter in the shitter. I can't find anything good in my life. Practical magic For the life of me, that was a fun night, but not that fun. Well, it's a good movie we haven't seen in a long time. Yeah, that's a good, that's a good one. I don't have a lot of glitter in the shitter. My daughter came home from college and she was like wanting to hang out and so I said let's watch like a scary, witchy movie or whatever. And so we watched Practical Magic and Cassie and I Only remember half of it.

Speaker 1: 13:35

90 bottles of Costco Perseco which actually should be one of my glitters in the shitters. Have I had it? I don't think yet. For glitter in the shitter? I don't think so Because Costco Perseco, it's good. I think I put it right up there with La Marca. Absolutely, costco vodka is really good. Kirkland vodka is delicious as well. Costco has great liquor. It is less than half the price. Yes, it's $7.99. Yes, and I like it almost better. Sorry, la Marca, $7.99 is what you would pay for a glass. Yes, even at the Legion, maybe. I think I paid 11 at the restaurant we went to for half the hour and I could drink a whole bottle. It's highway robbery. We did, we did, we drank a whole bottle. It really is $7. 4, 2, 1.

Speaker 1: 14:21

Costco Perseco and that show with Sandra Bullock and Nicole Gibbon, and we were obsessed, remember, because that one girl was in there. Oh, rachel Rachel Evans, evan Rachel Evans, evan Wood, yes, yes, when she was little. She was little in that movie. She was married to Marilyn Manson. Marilyn Manson, remember, yes, she was also in the greatest, one of the greatest movies across the universe, which I love. Oh, that could be. She has a no, nothing face to me. She's kind of yeah, yeah, I don't think I would recognize her ever. Yeah, she's very normal. Even if I saw her in another movie I would be like who's that? But she's pretty talented, so good for her. But I'll take your word for it she's a nothing face, ok.

Speaker 1: 15:05

So one more thing that I want to talk about is our book club. If you did not read the fucking vampire slayer book, you are dumb dumb. It was so good. I love it. It's one of my favorite books. I can't wait to nerd out and talk about it. If you love Flannery O'Connor, if you love Southern goth, if you love hilarity and feminism, you should read this book. Anyway, we're meeting on Zoom on the 24th of this month at 7.30 central time and we'll be talking about it then. So look in our Facebook group for those links.

Speaker 1: 15:49

Ok, sarah's getting mad because we've talked so long and we do not want to make her mad. No, I'm trying to lift her up Along with sad. I fear her. I fear her and her cat. I fear her dogs. Yeah, cassie said. Oh, they heard that. Sorry, all right, so let's get into our story. We've got to talk about the times, don't we? Well, yeah, I'm going to talk about our story. I'm going to tell everybody what the story is first, and then you can talk about your times.

Speaker 1: 16:20

This is a part where I'm really nervous because I never tell the story. You can do it, megan, you've done it with me. Sarah always tells the story and I feel like I'm not going to do a good enough to ask. There's a lot of pressure. There is a lot of pressure, ok. So Jesus, sarah's giving me the evil eye. Just get a little worked up every once in a while and go, yes, yes, talk like that, ok, ok, ok. So this story, say my god, say sir, no, a woman could have solved this in chess In it. And then what do you always say? Jeez, oh geez. That's what she always says. Ok, oh geez, oh geez, ok. So this is the story, the Halloween story.

Speaker 1: 17:16

We tried to have a theme of Halloween or spooky things, and so I just found this one. There was no real story, like, there was no forensic files about it, but there was a horrendously kind of like what do you call it? Spliced together video that you could watch About some of someone else telling the story, just like weird YouTube shit, right, yeah, yeah, basically that's how you describe it, yes, and the person talked like this yes, and never did leave from this tone and there was some music in the background and then some pictures would and they used the same picture multiple times. I think there were only like three pictures of people total. Very handsome. I think that Betty was beautiful. I thought Betty looked. I wrote down she looked like an ugly.

Speaker 1: 18:09

Kate Moss Okay, let's get, because I heard her describe as beautiful. Okay, okay, I'm picture up. You look, I saw it many times. Like Hammerhead shark eyes, yes, and kind of, yes, they're kind of, um, she's not as handsome as the other ones, but she has kind of hooded eyelids. Yes, she does have hooded like cake. I thought they were kind of cute. Her eyes Sometimes pull that picture and whatever. A side-by-side Sarah of Kate Moss and this lady, sarah, is resting.

Speaker 1: 18:43

Okay, okay, um, so this is the story of the Halloween murder of Peter Fabiano. I have to like have these names up all the time because I'm the one who always forgets everyone's name and every murder. Okay, so this is the murder of Peter Fabiano. Um, so we, like we said we watched a horrible YouTube video and then I also researched a little bit from the vintage woman Dot com and whoa hub pages. Did you guys know any other research? Um, yeah, I read an article on vice, okay, and I listened to a podcast. Oh, I did, too. It was terrible. Oh sure, um, and I forgot what it was called. Okay, so go. You guys like citing your sources? Yeah, thank you.

Speaker 1: 19:35

And we, again, we have never claimed to only tell the truth or not make fun of anyone. No, we'd love to make fun of people, okay, no, I'm gonna start it out making fun of someone before we go a bit. No, we don't. Okay, I'm gonna let it go. All right, so our story starts actually took place in 1957, okay, so this is, know what happened? Vintage. Please tell me about 1957.

Speaker 1: 20:04

An affair to remember was a big movie, and is that the movie from sleepless in Seattle? Mm-hmm, that's what I thought. Yep, the one of the greatest movies of the Bernhardt family. Oh, hello, howard, good one, that's why I named my cat Howard. Oh, cute, I don't think. I don't remember that movie. I don't know if I ever sleep in Seattle. Yeah, I'm being honest. Horses, horses, horses. Yeah, I don't think. I don't think. Oh, no, sorry guys, are you a Meg Ryan fan? Tom Hanks, that movie is not really. I know, it's a classic and it never gets old.

Speaker 1: 20:40

Okay, go, you're gonna watch it. We'll watch it next time we eat a gummy, and then free, no, we won't. We'll swatch Michael Jackson videos. No one else is gonna do that. I mean someone else, not me. I'm talking about gummy bears, I am y'all Okay. Elvis bought Graceland for one hundred thousand dollars. That is cheap 100,000 but in today's money it's probably like it's probably actually expensive in today's money, isn't it? I don't know, I don't know. Okay, money means I. We have money problems. We don't know what you do.

Speaker 1: 21:22

Yeah, names, as Sarah always loves to do. The top five names, and the first one, ray, is going for women. Mary, which is actually my daughter's name. She's named after her grandma. Yeah, not due to any religious affiliation. And then the other names Susan, linda, deborah and Karen, classics, every every 70 year old woman. Yeah, yes, linda, but Deborah is literally D, e, b, ra. Yeah, deborah, yeah, deborah, yeah, it was like Like a cool time to kind of modernize it. Okay, like a biblical. Deborah, yeah, okay, guess the boys names? Come on, shout them out.

Speaker 1: 22:20

Dwayne, john no, you're Michael, makin, I'm just, I don't. Michael is number one. John is five. James, yes, you know. Robert. Number four William no, oh, come on, you were on a roll, jake, wait, what did she say? John James, michael, james, robert and John Mark, paul? Oh no, I will. It's your father-in-law's name, soon to be David. David, of course. Yes, so lame, boring. Okay, come on, get it together. Boy names Um, the worst book on the world in the world was really popular on the road by Jack Hirwach.

Speaker 1: 23:07

I hate. I loved that. My selfie, of course, 16 year old, intellectual when I read that. So, yeah, you and every other white man in the country, yeah, no, hate those stupid people.

Speaker 1: 23:25

Um, she hates the beats. I do hate the beats, sarah, the beer hidden. I hate the Rachel, and except for the ones in that movie with the funny one, rose jailbird, happy earth in her cage no longer full of rich, she roots. I have no idea what's that. I married an axe murderer. Yes, never saw that movie. Oh, it's so good, tiffany. It's like you moved away from Trimont and we lost you for a while. You did. I also have ADHD, so it's very hard for me to sit down and watch a whole watching movie. So movies are tough for me.

Speaker 1: 24:04

Okay, uh, sputnik launched boring, oh, that's for Sarah. Oh, my god, do you want to hear my sputnik launch? Of course I wrote down. Yeah, what it's terrible. I was reading it. Laugh.

Speaker 1: 24:16

Sputnik one was launched first space satellite Sputnik two also launched, with a dog named Leica, a stray they knew would die. No, that literally happened. Wait, they did the. It died. They put it in space, yeah, died, but never came back. No, there was no plan for it to come back, they just threw it up there, yes, and let it die. Yes, that is terrible. Sorry, everybody, what the f? Why didn't people stand up and revolt? Well, were they just trying to see if, like life? No, I don't think that there was any kind of science thing involved. Had to be Soviet Union.

Speaker 1: 25:01

Okay, one other thing this one, I think, is interesting and I'd never heard of this North East Airlines flight 823 crashed into Rikers, the prison, oh my god, I just left LaGuardia and they crashed into the Rikers and they it killed 20 people. It injured 95 prisoners. Or escape. No, these are just listen. Oh, sorry, these are just people on the plane. 20 of them died, 95 were injured and six crew members were injured. 57 inmates ran to help. Whoo, oh, wait, I thought they ran. No, ah, ah, ah, Ah, ah, ah, no, but get this. Ok, most of them were released or they got lester sentences because they helped. Ah, isn't that nice. I just got goosebumps, me too.

Speaker 1: 25:50

That should be a movie. I had never heard. Watch that movie. I should have a movie. Nobody take our idea. Ok, we called it here first, tm, tm, yep.

Speaker 1: 25:59

And then one last thing the killer Africanized bees. You know killer bees? Yeah, hell yeah, I do. They exist today because they yeah, I don't get it. Ok, they exist today because they accidentally escaped quarantine in the year 1957. Oh, my god, wow, they were being created. Were they trying to make a revolt bee Between African bees and European bees? And they became killer bees. And then they escaped, and that's why they exist in the world and they're killing people Not a lot of people, though. Sure I can't. Oh god, well, thank you for.

Speaker 1: 26:50

Do you want to hear about Frisbees, frisbees, frisbees? Sure, I forgot. I actually don't, I just keep seeing things. This was kind of interesting too. Frisbees were a big hit this year, but they were called Pluto plates when they started. That just goes to show how boring 1957 was Literally, literally boring they were. Then, wait, were they purchased by a pie company, or they? I think so. They got sold, or something. And then Frisbe was the name of a pie company in Connecticut who used to take the pie plates and toss them into the garbage, and so then they thought those were like Frisbees, so they called Frisbees, frisbees, boring, boring, boring, boring.

Speaker 1: 27:35

Did you feel like you had to tell that? Okay, great TT, do you have any? Well, I told the sorry about the dead dog. You did Rip Kaika. So what was the dog's name? Lekha, oh, lekha. Oh, I was close.

Speaker 1: 27:53

I did write some stuff down, but it's kind of weird. Yeah, so the number six song was called Don't Forbid Me by Pat Boone, very rapey. It was basically like don't forbid my arms, don't forbid my kiss. And then the last line is it's so cold, don't forbid my desire. What the fuck, pat Boone? That's gross. They wanted it and they couldn't get it, but they still wanted to have their way. It's like baby, it's cold, oh, it's very baby.

Speaker 1: 28:28

Pat Boone is still alive and Tan, he's very tan. Oh my God, oh, does he? He's 89. Oh, lord, huh, does he look better or worse than Kenny Lagan's does right now? Sorry, megan Cassie by Bernhardt, do not. How dare you, did you see? Well, richard Marks looks like a goddamn Greek god. Did you see my comment, I did. Richard Marks looks just like the Sarandon guy from Princess Bride, but better, what's the first name? David, chris, chris, I knew that. Yeah, you did.

Speaker 1: 29:09

Okay, so that rapy song hit the charts and some movies that people were going to, because Sarah loves movies 12 Angry Men, ooh, classic Classic. We had to watch it in history class or something. It was a play, right, yes, so I had to read the play. Okay, we saw the movie Boring, boring, boring. So the bridge on the River Kwai was the best, I guess most popular movie.

Speaker 1: 29:45

And there was also. There were also TV. There was TV. Well, yeah, I love. That was the first year that TV was Color. No, it was not so expensive that, like, regular people could buy it. Yeah, gunsmoke and the Danny Thomas show were the top two.

Speaker 1: 30:06

And was our dad like? He was like not even 10 then, right, I think it was Bonan. Oh, didn't dad love Bonanza when he was little? Yeah, but I feel like what was that one? You just said Gunsmoke? I feel like he loved Gunsmoke. Probably.

Speaker 1: 30:20

I think it was on forever, though I remember Gunsmoke being on when we were kids, channel 42. Yeah, okay, try my, it looked a lot. Yeah, it looked like a lot of those things. And then, like you bet your life and this is your life and that kind of lassie was on the Ed Sullivan show oh, the other one was a movie this year too, by the way. Oh, my God, can you believe we watched these things? No, I cannot. And we were like this is cool, no, okay.

Speaker 1: 30:48

And then, like you said, the songs. The number one song was all shook up, all this Presley, and then weird Pat Boone song I'm taking over for Megan, and also wake up, little Susie, wake up. Yes, hey, nice Tiffany, thanks, I'm toned up. And bye bye love too. Bye bye love. Bye bye happiness. Yes, goodbye, loneliness, I'm going to die. Okay, sarah is literally rolling in her grave, except she's not dead. Let's start talking about the murder.

Speaker 1: 31:36

Peter Fabiano Okay, fabiano, you have to say it like that. Peter Fabiano was born in 1923. And he served in World War II. Thank you for your service, peter. And after he got back from the war, he married a lovely lady with red hair, just like Sarah, named Betty, who looked like an ugly Kate Moss, although she was described as beautiful. I hope someone does the same favor for me something.

Speaker 1: 32:14

Look up Betty Fabiano and find this picture. Okay, so she, betty, had been previously married and she had a couple of kids from that marriage and Peter, she got around. Well, she really did. That was scandalous in 1950. Yeah, she, peter, welcomed her kids into their home and they lived in a beautiful suburb of LA called Sun Valley, where nothing can go wrong, something we'll never know. Sun Valley, or a place where nothing goes wrong, that's right. And apparently in Sun Valley the stars are shining and they're shooting across the sky constantly. Did you see that in the show? Yes, that was the weird picture. It was like a fake picture. Just, I was like, oh, wow, so anyway, peter was a hairstylist.

Speaker 1: 33:12

Which, sexy, got me, got it, got me too. I went. It was a little, hmm, that, a military man in the fifties, but I do think that, like most, oh, they did have barbers back then, but he was not a barber. Men did most of the hair styling, did most of the chef stuff. I mean, you think about it, yeah, more men were teachers at that time. Women just weren't as involved in the workforce. You're right, so dumb, you're right. So Peter was a hair stylist at first and then he bought, he owned two successful salons in LA. I'm Miriam, oh my God, I heard her. I heard it. I'm being making tonight. No, stop it. So he owned two successful salons and they people said he was very professional and he always gave back to the community and they were a very well liked family living a lovely life. Now sounds a nice.

Speaker 1: 34:14

Enter Joan rabble no, rebel, rebel, rebel, rebel, rebel. I thought it was rebel. I wrote down rebel, but I do have a hearing loss, so it's spelled R-A-B-E-L from the articles that I read. Okay, so I did a lot of research. Consonants are hard, you guys. Yeah, I know. Yeah, so it's rebel. Keep it going, nick, and sorry, I forgot that.

Speaker 1: 34:45

I, sarah, always tells a story that I forgot. Usually you just go uh-huh, yeah, oh, we know. So there was, joan, was very mysterious. She was from Pennsylvania, maybe. Yeah, I think so. Or she was Lithuania. She was from Lithuania, maybe. Oh, you guys are twins. Was she very ugly? I wrote Eek. Yes, I wrote Eek, handsome, very in honor of Sarah. This is a handsome woman like no other and, sarah, we salute you because this Joan Rabble, rebel, rebel is literally our poster child for handsome women.

Speaker 1: 35:31

Was she wearing a wig or was that her real hair. I don't know. I don't know, but her eyes were fucked up, sorry, dan, they were like down here and she looked like Very large. Yes, she had like a Betty Davis kind of look to them. I don't understand the whole thing. And also a little bit of her reminded me of the lady Joan Crawford yeah, joan Crawford, but also who was the lady Wallace Simpson, who was married to the King, who abdicated, abdicated, who got eradicated, he eradicated, he was eradicated and abdicated.

Speaker 1: 36:15

But she got men, she sure did. This lady got women. Joan somehow was picking them up left and right. She again had been married, got divorced and started working, had to work, leave the home and work. So she worked in the salon for Peter and he should have done something with her hair. She's not the victim, you guys, we can make fun of her. Okay, yes, tiffany, okay, so she became very close with Betty. I don't know if they were like both receptionists or something happened. It tastes sexist. Is that all women could do? Oh, yes, yes, it was, it sure was. And so they became like best friends.

Speaker 1: 37:07

Now here's where my sources differed. Oh yeah, some say that they were lovers. Yes, became lovers. I'm gonna say definitively yes, yes. However, it was such Taboo, yes, that the only thing that the papers at the time would say I'm getting ahead of myself was an unnatural relationship. Oh, this is, you've done some research? Very unnatural, yes, I did, yes, so, and some said they were just very close and that Joanne was definitely trying to seduce her and Betty was like she's just my best friend, whatever there was that could have been the case. I mean, maybe, I don't know, that was the two. Joanne was definitely a predator, different things. Maybe they just snuggled, just a little spoonie, yeah, who knows. And then so they became close.

Speaker 1: 38:09

At some point during the relationship, joanne started telling people that Betty's husband, peter, was a total dick and was beating her, was really abusive, and it even I'm trying to channel Megan In one of my sources it said that she, that Betty, had even separated from Peter for a while. Oh, I didn't hear that. Yes, that is the case, okay, okay, betty did separate and she actually moved in with Joan. Oh, snap. So I'm gonna go back on my previous relationship. There's a lot more. You're gonna double down, okay, same to him too.

Speaker 1: 38:47

And so at some point, though, though, though, though, at some point though, peter decided he would take Betty back. Well, yeah, I think Betty made the decision that she wanted to reconcile with Peter and she was like I want to come back, yeah, and they're totally fine. He said okay, and she moved back in and they, you know, the seasons passed, is that what that's called? Yeah, what she's. There could have been beards on both sides of the, I don't know. Yeah, I think Betty, you know, as somebody who's done so much research, she knows so much. Betty, maybe it was a little bi, yeah, yeah, okay. Yeah, she maybe was a little bi, yeah. So, anyway, there's nothing wrong with that. We've talked about this extensively. It's cool, yeah, okay.

Speaker 1: 39:37

So, girl, she went back to move in with Peter and the seasons changed and it became fall and the spooky season of Halloween, like we're in now, and this is where the story gets interesting. So Joan, during this time, met a woman with the weirdest name I've ever seen. Her name was Goldine Goldine, goldine, goldine, goldine, goldine, but it was spelled with a Y Goldianne, goldine. So it was spelled G-O-L-D-Y-N-E, and it was said that their relationship was a quote unquote coffee clatch relationship. So they would just go have coffee and brunch together and giggle, and except, first of all, they called her attractive Again, attractive, my ass, not attractive. So they are having coffee together and Joan starts talking shit about Peter in the coffee house and really riling up Goldine.

Speaker 1: 40:49

But let's go back to the fact that Goldine was married to a man, married, yep, to a man, divorced. Yeah, loved the ladies, yeah, 100%, as did. Yeah, they all did. I mean, joan and Goldine definitely loved the ladies, don't get me wrong, but it's the 50s. We forget. They had to. Oh my God, they had no choice. I know, I forget they can't work. People still not feel like they have to do the same thing. I know, I know, I know I want to live in a world where that doesn't happen. I know, but this is the 50. This is 57. Cassie, okay, sorry, okay.

Speaker 1: 41:29

So, as they get closer right, there's obviously some sexual relationships going on, a sexual relationship going on between the two. But Joan is like so manipulative that she tells Goldine or Goldine, sorry Goldine that she needs to kill Peter. This is where you know that Joan is a predator. Yes, master manipulator, I'm a naster manipulator. She's a manaster. She's a manaster manipulator. Now, goldine was like legitimately 43. She was a secretary. She was like nerdy and pretty ugly and she, there's that, yeah, and so because she was divorced, right, and Joan was 40.

Speaker 1: 42:19

And Joan lived very close to Goldine and they were hanging out right Now, hanging out and doing it, hanging out and doing it, so they devised this plan to kill Peter. So they decided to do it on Halloween and as Peter and Betty were just handing out candy left and right in their cute suburban neighborhood, joan and Goldine were sitting in a car waiting for the trick or treaters to go home so they could fucking murder Peter. They watched for two hours. Two hours, yes, hours. Okay.

Speaker 1: 43:07

Then here is the weirdest part of all. Joan told Goldine I think this is weird too. I wrote it down that she had to dress up because it was Halloween. Okay, now, cassie, cassie, what did she tell Goldine to dress up like? I don't know what she was supposed to dress up like, I don't know, but she had to wear khaki pants. But they were jeans, yeah, khaki jeans, red gloves, a button down shirt, a white shirt. And then they said and makeup? And I was like makeup, makeup For the lesbian, yes, but no, it wasn't that kind of makeup, it was like clown makeup, because then she wore a mask and then, right before she went to the house. The mask was one like the Batman war or like Robin. Yeah, robin war. Yeah, it was a bl so she was like a superhero clown cowboy, but the red gloves really got me the jeans when she was like she had to dress up for Halloween.

Speaker 1: 44:22

Wear jeans what the fuck? Khaki jeans. I know what my costume is this year. Yeah, oh my God, zombie pub crawl, zombie pub crawl. Yes, you're going to be Goldine. You are Goldine. Okay, I will be Joan, but as Joan is in jail Because I'm wearing a jail, and then Goldine. This is the best part.

Speaker 1: 44:44

Goldine brought a paper bag and she cause like, apparently kids used to bring around small paper bags like what we eat popcorn out of, and that's what they used to get candy. Poor fuckers. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, they were what Poor little fuckers. So she put the gun inside the brown paper bag and went up to the door and rang the doorbell. Now, what time was it? 11 PM.

Speaker 1: 45:18

That's why, in the video we watched, they were like he was very annoyed, he was pissed. Yes, I can't, even I need. My question is why would you even get to the door? No, you shut. You keep the lights off for a reason, yep, we're done. And then you just go to bed. Yeah, so he grabs. He literally grabbed candy. No, off the counter, no one's coming, at 11 in 1957. And he but that's how naive people were as well. It was the suburbs man. They didn't know we live in the suburbs, we're not that dumb. It's 20. 23. This was 1957. Again, how many times do we have to tell you Problems? Time travel with us. Please travel back in time with us.

Speaker 1: 46:10

So she has the gun inside the paper bag, she rings the doorbell, he grabs some candy, he opens the door and he says it's a little late to be trick or treating, isn't it? And she pointed the gun at him and said no, and shot him in the chest through the paper. No, but it was her. No, it was her. Geez, why would he say no? I thought he would be like no, oh, she said no and shot him in that, in the re. Cassie, whatever that thing is. What is it called? A reenact, reenact, enactment, reimagine, reimagine, enactment, anyway, whatever it is, they said.

Speaker 1: 46:56

The wife Betty heard a low voice say no. So I thought it was him going. No, no, it was the lesbian's low voice. No, okay. So she said no and shot him. He fell to the floor dead. His wife hears the gun. He's like, oh my God, my husband's dead on the floor. Oh my God, no, oh my God, you're my favorite. And she is like help, right. She ran next door because their next door neighbor was a cop and this. So then they tried life saving efforts. It didn't work. He was just bleeding all over and in the meantime Goldeen ran her fucking clown ass farmer mask back to the car that Joan was driving and they drove away getaway car.

Speaker 1: 47:52

Now, joan was very sneaky. She had obviously manipulated Goldeen into killing this man for nothing. She wasn't paying her, she wasn't doing anything. It was just like some weird forceful psychological shit. I think Joan gave her what she was doing. You know what I mean? Because, because this poor Goldeen. Goldeen just even looks in the picture. She's just like oh shit. And then she gets in the car and says forget, you ever knew me. That's what she told Goldeen. So Goldeen is obviously now heartbroken, right? Yes, totally manipulated.

Speaker 1: 48:36

The next morning Goldeen was like I still have the gun, what the fuck am I supposed to do with it? So she took it to Bullock's flagship store. This is really weird because, yeah, she took it to like a department store where they have lockers, yes, and I tried to look up, like why were there lockers in a department store? But I couldn't find anything Like the Adam Walsh thing and like all of those stories. They had lockers in places. These elaborate Adam Walsh and lockers in places.

Speaker 1: 49:21

They sure did so anyway, for, like your bags, they haven't met them. All America. You put your shopping bags in them so you don't have to carry them around. I suppose it's unusual though to see nowadays I feel like nowadays, but I think that's what they did. Yeah, you're right. Yeah, because people took more public transportation. They didn't have cars. Oh hello, who is the smart one now? She finally made it back in time. Thanks for joining us in 1957. Thank you, sorry, took a little break. You did, you did. So. She put the gun in some locker in some downtown store. I don't know if his butt looks like a Macy's or something. Yeah, whatever. Deaton, nobody knows who Dayton is, that's Minnesota, okay. A Yonkers? A Yonkers in South Dakota, south Dakota, okay.

Speaker 1: 50:16

So two weeks later, people are starting to look into this and they ask the wife I forgot her name Betty. Betty, she was like I'm a bear, a bear, sorry, bear. They ask Betty who would want to kill your husband? Everybody loves him and he does the best hair and she was like fucking Joan. She said it right away. So they had been kind of looking into Joan and they figured out she'd been hanging out at the coffee place with Goldeen they go to talk to Goldeen and she basically spilled the beans. Were Betty and Joan fighting? Why would she narc on her like that? You know you did research, yes, okay.

Speaker 1: 51:07

So once Betty moved out of Joan's house and moved back in with her husband, she was like I'm done with this crazy. The husband it's Peter, right, peter, peter, fabiano, peter's like he kind of knew that they had like a thing and he's like we're done. And then they fired Joan and they were like you can never talk. And he said you can never talk to her again. Okay, so they completely cut her out of their lives and she hated them. Yes, absolutely so she was pissed at both of them. She was pissed at both of them, she was getting back at both of them. But I think she was in love with Betty as well. Absolutely, because she would have killed Betty if she would.

Speaker 1: 51:43

Well, sometimes you kill the people. You know Murders happen all the time where people kill people. Yeah, they love when people kill people. Sometimes you kill who kill people they love. Oh, I thought you meant murders happen all the time when people kill people. That's what she said. That is not what she meant. Okay, rewind.

Speaker 1: 52:05

So they have some vintage photos of Goldeen and Joan outside of the courthouse and poor Goldeen literally looks like she's just gonna crumble. And then Joan is just like she might as well be walking around with her middle finger up. So she's like fuck all of you. And she was like had a smirk On her face and they said throughout the whole court proceedings, goldeen was like crying and felt so bad. And they said Joan wouldn't say a thing, Just smirked the whole time, was like ice. They quoted she was hollow-eyed and stone-like. That's what they it was in a paper Hollow-eyed and stone-like for Joan.

Speaker 1: 52:51

And then Goldeen actually claimed insanity and easily influenced Was her. But it didn't work. But you guys, okay, wait, sorry, do you remember? So, before we get to their, oh sorry, before we get to their what's it called their sentence, did you hear in that video when the guy said their claims were unsubstantiated? No, rune down Unsubstantiated. Obviously, he meant unsubstantiated, just like you. What you tried to say. Nope, I said it right, rewind, uh-huh. Well, their sentences were real stiff.

Speaker 1: 53:42

These ladies got five years to life and what did they serve, megan? They served five years and both of the well, goldeen, we don't know where Joan went. Yeah, goldeen went on to remarry A man or a woman. Well, obviously, a man, a man, not a good choice, goldeen, and Sex marriage back then. And so she went on and she, goldeen, died in 1998. Yeah, it was late. Yeah, she lived a long time.

Speaker 1: 54:20

Now, peter, after he died, betty sold the beauty salon. She remarried again and she died in 1999. Okay, and no one literally knows what happened. Nope, to Joan. No one knows. Yep, she doesn't believe. No, I don't. That's like you knew. Nobody knows.

Speaker 1: 54:42

She got out of jail. They know she left jail, disappeared, but then she changed identities. She went back to Lithuania, she Ooh, to seduce more women. There. She Cray, yeah, she is. And that's the story of the ghostly Halloween clown. Paper bag murder. Paper bag murder. Peter, fabriana, I mean Fabiana. Oh, my gosh, she said it wrong again. Not far, get it together. Not far is out. Not far had conferences at the deodorant factory tonight and not bar is tired. So not bar hasn't even had wine or anything, she's just Tired. This is just how she is. She's tired, you guys, I'm really tired.

Speaker 1: 55:34

So thanks so much for listening. We would love to send some good vibes out for Sarah and we hope to be back with another freaky Halloween episode next week. If you're in our Minnesota area on the 29th or 28th, we will be starting off the zombie pub crawl in prayer lake at Boat House Brothers, and then we're also doing Project Pink in November. And send Titi some good vibes, because the queen of the Pee High is about to take on a king. Woo Woo, a short king. Is that what you're talking about? Yes, I am. I didn't learn my lesson the first time. Do it again. Do it again. Do it to me one more time, all right. So thanks for listening. We're sorry about this episode. I am sorry. We tried. We need Sarah. Bye, bye.