Love, Sickness And Health With Kim and Jim Bello, MGH Covid-19 Miracle

Today we have two special guests Jim and Kim Bello. They have been married for 23 years, and they have the best love story I have ever heard. Their story is so incredible it became a national news story. In this week's episode, we will discuss what love and marriage look like during COVID-19. Jim Bello is a husband, lawyer, and father of three. He spent 32 days fighting for his life on a ventilator, and when Jim's health took a turn for the worst, the hospital allowed his wife Kim, to be by his side. Soon after Kim's visit, Jim became what Mass General Hospital calls its COVID Miracle. We discuss sickness, health, and the healing power of love.

 Jim Bello, 49, was hiking the White Mountains in New Hampshire when he spiked a fever. He was one of Massachusetts' earliest cases and the first in the town we both grew up in. Jim was a healthy athlete with no preexisting conditions, yet he was in a fight for his life within a week. His health continued to decline, nothing was working, and the results were not encouraging. As his team relayed this devastating information to his wife Kim–she wasn't having it. She refused to believe that Jim wouldn't make it, and she got busy raising funds for the health care providers. The Bello's Go Fund Me has raised over $50,000 for meals and supplies for MGH in Boston, and they recently donated IPADS for patients at the hospital so they can communicate with their families. Their story is beyond inspiring! 

Kerry Brett's discussion with Jim and Kim Bello cover a lot of ground. Topics include:

How to take a tragic situation and turn it into a positive.
How important it is  to always keep fighting.
The power of love and determination.
Finding the strength, you never thought you had.
How to honor medical professionals who bravely put their lives on the line.
There are good days and bad days in life, but it's always important to always be grateful.
Always lead with a generous spirit, look for ways to share, and look for ways to give. What you give comes back to you ten-fold.
Stay away from toxic relationships. You are not healing them; they are making you sick. When looking for relationships, focus on creating a healthy one.
Sometimes you have to fight through some bad days to earn the best days of your life.

Kim and Jim's relationship truly exemplifies what a married couple should be. Incredibly, they  gave back to their community during the most challenging time in their life, proving  that the world is truly a great place.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:03

I'm Carrie Brett, and this is shot at love today. We have two special guests, Jim and Kim Bello. They've been married for 23 years and they have the best love story I have ever heard. Their story is so incredible. It became a national news story. And this week's episode, we will discuss what love and marriage look like during COVID-19. Jim bellow is a husband, lawyer, and father of three. He spent 32 days fighting for his life on a ventilator. And when Jim's health took a turn for the worst, the hospital allowed his wife, Kim to be biocide. Soon after Kim's visit, Jim became what mass general hospital calls is. COVID miracle. Will we come back? We'll be discussing sickness health and the healing power of love. You won't want to miss it. So stay tuned. Welcome Jim and Kim. Thanks so much for being here. Thanks for having us. Thanks for having us, Carrie, how you feel in gym. I feel great. Thank you for asking. That's great. So before we start, I want to give an overview of your journey. This year, Jim bellow 49 was hiking the white mountains in New Hampshire. When he spiked a fever, he was one of Massachusetts earliest cases in the first in the town we both grew up in Jim was a healthy athlete with no pre-existing conditions. Yet. He was in the fight for his life within a week. His health continued to decline. Nothing was working and the results were not encouraging. As his team relayed this devastating information to his wife, Kim, she wasn't having it. She refused to believe that Jim wouldn't make it. And she got busy raising funds for the health care providers. The bellows GoFund me has raised over 50,000 for meals and supplies for MGH in Boston. And they recently donated iPads for patients at the hospital so they can communicate with their families. Their story is beyond inspiring. And I honestly have no words for how impressed I am before you share your unbelievable story. I want people to get to know you who you are as people. And as a couple, let's start with you. Jim, put new in the hot seat, buddy. I have to say in life, some people touch your life and make an impact. Jim bellow is one of those people. Once Jim got home from the hospital, he declined all press coverage of his story because he's truly a private person. He wanted to focus on his family and adjust to this new normal, which I admire. I was reluctant to ask him knowing this about him, but, and

Speaker 2: 3:00

I'm still shocked. You're here.

Speaker 1: 3:03

We've been living in such a dark time with hardly any positive stories. And I thought their story could inspire others. Jim remains that same person with that same sense of humor. And he's here today because he's a loyal friend. And if his information can help someone else, he will show up. I just wanted to acknowledge that and say thank you while letting you know how much this means to me. So thank you, Jim. My pleasure. Happy to do it. Thank you. So that being said, we share, raise some hell. Then we, while we were growing up in Hingham, we had a pretty good time caring, no doubt about it. Probably stuff we shouldn't talk about.

Speaker 2: 3:38

Right? So sometimes it's

Speaker 1: 3:41

Our earliest experiences that really shaped our lives. In high school. We worked together at Bertucci's and we would compete who could handle the most tables or flip tables the fastest during our lunch rushes, we've come a long way from slinging and slot is in rigatoni, broccoli and chicken. Haven't we,

Speaker 3: 3:59

We sure have, but I can still spend a pizza. Pretty good. So I kid my kids were impressed with the fact that I can spend it here.

Speaker 2: 4:07

I don't know. It gives you,

Speaker 1: 4:09

Which makes you tough being a waitress or waiter.

Speaker 3: 4:12

Right? And that I don't know what the quota was, but however many roles I had to do on a given five or 10 minute period in order to cook them with a rush coming in the door, right. We had some good times.

Speaker 1: 4:21

We did. I was always spotted because I always gave people way too many roles. And I was like, chatting it up and all the tables and, um, and I would mix up things, but people would come back to be in my section. And, um, somehow I, I would get busted by a spotter, but I would never get caught. And you guys all knew it was me, but Oh yeah, for sure.

Speaker 3: 4:45

My best recollections are Bertucci's was not what happened during the lunch and dinner shifts. But the after hours, when the doors would close,

Speaker 2: 4:55

[inaudible]

Speaker 1: 4:56

They ask you about falling in love with Kim and starting a family. I have to tell the story about the last, um, TV show. Cheers, because this finale part, this finale party that we went to is such a funny story. And then I promise to stop talking about memory lane, but I can't help myself because I, I am Frank the tank and I love to live in the glory days. So it was circa 1993 and I had just left Keene state in New Hampshire. And I was getting ready to get hired at the improper Bostonian, which was just like four blocks away from cheers. And you were, were you going

Speaker 2: 5:31

To knowing that school? Uh, I can't remember.

Speaker 3: 5:33

We figured that out. I think it was just before I started law school. Okay. So you were still at[inaudible], right? Yeah. I was still making

Speaker 2: 5:41

Amazing. Awesome. So

Speaker 1: 5:44

Over a million households tuned into the cheers finale and the numbers were so beyond the world series or Superbowls at the time, it seriously, it was the hottest ticket in town. So I remember we weren't allowed down to the actual part. And then the second level was where the party was, but all the stars of cheers were on the third level. And somehow you got up to the third level and I'm sure Kim shocked by that.

Speaker 2: 6:16

And I don't know how we got up

Speaker 1: 6:18

There, but like, you were like lit no, keep going.

Speaker 3: 6:21

You just of, yeah, you were like,

Speaker 1: 6:23

Right. And so I like look over and you're like having drinks with like Wade box and Mike Dukakis

Speaker 2: 6:31

Again, your memory's way better than mine. I don't know whether it's the drinks or the years, but it's far better than mine. I was like, I can't believe

Speaker 1: 6:39

Like we're with, we're like in this library with all the stars of chairs. And so this emotional hour between 11, 11, 30 thousands and thousands of Bostonians and fans gathered across the street in the Boston common. And my dad kept going up and down all the different flights and he tells his story and it's always so funny. He went back downstairs because he knew the stars would be eventually leaving the third floor to go back, to do the late show with Jay Leno. And my dad was probably thinking, all right, I'm going to try to get them a couple of these guys before they go down to the, the cheers part. And he gets to the streets and he sees thousands of thousands of people. So he goes and photographs of screaming crowds. Meanwhile, we're up standing next to Ted Danson and Ted Danson opens up the window and waves to the fans. And Jim and I are right there. And my dad being at the right place at the right time is on the street and he gets the crowd cheering and he gets Ted Danson waving. And he, in his mind, he's like, where is Carrie and Jim? Like, I haven't seen them all night. And then Jim's like, come on. So Ted waves and the crowds of screaming and then there's

Speaker 2: 7:50

Me and Jim[inaudible] exists. My dad was shooting it. And he was like, well, there they are. And we got to look for that one. Okay.

Speaker 1: 7:57

Oh my God. That is so fun. Is that the funniest story? So I had to bring that one up, but Jim, back to you and Kim, how did you meet Kim? And I know you two have been through an awful lot the past 23 years. Tell me what it was like when you first met Kim, because I can remember when you first told me about her, you were smiling so big, literally beaming when you first told me about,

Speaker 3: 8:20

I guess we meet where everybody meets on a cruise. So I was on a cruise. It would have been what, January of 97, I think. Right? Yeah. And I had taken a cruise with a bunch of my high school folks from around here. And, uh, I, my first recollection is what is that thing that you were doing there when you go onto the bar? Oh, you gotta, um, you gotta get down low and down to the bar.

Speaker 2: 8:46

So Kim was doing

Speaker 3: 8:48

Bo and in a, in a bikini and I was looking down from above on the Lido deck and I said, well, she looks pretty cute. And then at night she showed up in this stunning sequence

Speaker 2: 8:59

Fixtures. Ah,

Speaker 3: 9:01

And, uh, yeah, so we met on the cruise and uh, just, I was living in, uh, Western, Massachusetts doing a clerkship at the time. And Kim was living down in Providence and uh, we made it work, started off a long distance relationship of about an hour, an hour and a half of what it was. But yeah, I started

Speaker 1: 9:18

So Kim, even though I don't know you as well as Jim, but to have one Jim's heart, you've heard he's special. And you showed everyone in our community. What you're made of the type of wife and mother you are when Jim got sick, you're so strong. And I always say anyone who can take a tragic situation, turn a negative into a positive, truly has super powers. Kim, I think you're so resilient and amazing. I bet you're pretty grateful to have Jim back home. I am so grateful. You don't even know. Um, thank you

Speaker 2: 9:51

All of the time. All of the time. Yes.

Speaker 1: 9:57

It's great to have him home. That's so nice. I'm so glad he is a COVID miracle. I really am. Jim, can you tell us what happened when he first got sick things spiraled pretty fast from a fun weekend up in the white mountains with your family?

Speaker 3: 10:13

Um, so to start off, I guess I started feeling sick. Uh, as you said, I did a hike with a good friend of mine up loon mountain, where we have a place up there. And, um, shortly after that went to go grab a beer. And typically that as is typical with Opry ski would lead to several beers, but there was one beer and I was done. So I knew something was wrong with me. Um, so then that night I spiked a fever. And then, uh, over the course, I ended up driving home. That was a Saturday. If I recall correctly, drove home Sunday morning just to get home. The kids were, stayed up with camp to ski for the day. I think we had two cars if I recall correctly. Yeah. And then over the course of the next week just started to feel worse and worse. Initially they thought it was a pneumonia and treated me for pneumonia. And then the next day I went back in midweek and got some fluids thinking that I was dehydrated. And, um, and by Friday I was pretty sick. So that's when I went to the hospital and kind of the rest of the story from there. Okay.

Speaker 1: 11:07

So you were quickly transferred to mass general and you became the first incubated Corona virus patient, and they decided that you needed to be put on a ventilator. And the scene that was painted in the New York times article is so nice and is why you two need a book and a movie with Reese where there's been playing Kim and Matt Damon playing Jim, totally putting that out there.

Speaker 3: 11:31

Certainly Reese, I don't know about me and Matt Damon, but it would be great

Speaker 1: 11:35

Who would have a Bradley Cooper?

Speaker 2: 11:42

[inaudible] so this was such a

Speaker 1: 11:45

Jim, when I read this, my heart broke for the two of you and your kids with your permission. I'm going to read these few lines from the article written by Pam Bellack. By March 13th, he had so much trouble breathing. He went to a suburban Boston hospital, emergency room. The doctors quickly decided he needed a ventilator. What if I don't make it? He asked his wife, she assured him and recalled that he winked at me the same way. He winked at me when we first met. And Jim, even though you were so afraid and I'm sure you were afraid you purposely winked, so Kim wouldn't be as sick as you were. You were still taking care of her. That's love. He was. Yeah, no, I remember that actually. I wouldn't think you'd forget.

Speaker 3: 12:29

No, I do. I remember sitting, uh, at South shore hospital or was at the time and one of the things I remember most about that was right before they made the decision to intubate me. They asked if I wanted to call the kids and I just couldn't do it. I figured, you know, I, I thought at that point that it would be a couple of days and I'd be home, but I just didn't have it in me to call them as much as I love them. I just, to me, that's not like some, uh, I dunno, some degree or some message of finality that I was unwilling to accept.

Speaker 4: 12:55

Exactly. I did not. You know, that, that came out and I didn't accept it.

Speaker 1: 13:01

I think that might've put more pressure on you.

Speaker 3: 13:04

I, as I said, you know, I, I, at the time I remember I asked the question, am I going to wake up? And they assured me that I would, chemistry had made, I wouldn't when I woke up, I said, why were you telling me that at the time that wasn't so clear cut at the time, but in any event, um, yeah, I just, I couldn't do it.

Speaker 1: 13:20

I don't blame you. And you're, you're very strong, Jim. I mean, you're, you always have been, I mean, you're very solid and this was also new. Like, we didn't know what was happening and to be the first case and not knowing what to expect. And I don't even think mass general knew what to expect.

Speaker 4: 13:39

Yeah. No one knew what to expect. I mean, we got there and they didn't even treat him as a COVID patient at the time. They were just getting the tests. They didn't even have tests that week. Um, so, you know, as soon as like the doors closed and the mouse went on, we're like, Whoa, we have COVID, you know, um, it was kind of like a shocking moment for everyone there. You know, even the emergency room workers, they didn't, they didn't know how to handle it. They weren't prepared. I mean, I remember walking out of there after he was intubated in the emergency room. And one of the nurses ran after me and literally handed me a handful of masks. He's like, take these home with you. Because at that point they didn't have any, anywhere, like they were running short already. Um, and it hadn't even begun yet.

Speaker 1: 14:28

Wow. I think we're going to take a short break, but when we come back, we're going to talk about handling challenging times during COVID-19 and the power of love and determination. And we're back with Kim and Jim Bello. Kim take the listeners back. Jim is now on a ventilator. And when we took a short break where you're saying that, thank God he got to MGH. Thank God he got a bed. Thank God. He got a ventilator and all this was happening so fast.

Speaker 4: 15:01

Yeah. It was happening really fast. We didn't, you know, for me, I was, you know, alone, the kids were getting Chick-fil-A or whatever, because we weren't home for dinner. We, I was trying to keep them as calm because they didn't know what was happening. And when I didn't come home with them, with him, I think he, you know, the kids were just a little bit like what's going on with him, you know? And um, I said, it'll be all right. You know, we'll get through this. And they, you know, he's got COVID and, you know, we'll, we'll do what we can to, um, keep busy. And at that point, school had just shut down. So they weren't going back to school and we were quarantine. So, um, we, um, just stuck together for two weeks and, you know, we had a schedule going with calling the hospital and talking to the staff and the nurses. And, you know, it's, it's hard to kind of go back to, you know, every day. But I feel like, you know, the first two weeks when we were quarantined, I feel like everything started shutting down, you know? So, um, but I felt so alone, you know, even though the kids were there, no one could be there, you know, and it was hard

Speaker 1: 16:13

I'm sure. And then word started to get out in the community. And one of your friends made that video and I just felt so helpless. I just felt like, how can this be happening and what everyone felt that way everyone felt like, what can we do? And there wasn't like anything they could do because everyone was just quarantining in their house. We were just adjusting to every, every day. I remember that in the beginning of COVID-19, every day was different. Every day was a different challenge. And I remember thinking, no matter what, like I was shocked, I was saddened. I was afraid, but I knew that Jim would be all right.

Speaker 4: 16:54

Yeah. You know, the same for me. Like, I always felt that, you know, this is just not happening to us at all and he's going to be okay and he'll get through it. And every day I felt like it would get better, but it got worse. But you know, the only thing that kept me going, number one, thank you to this community. Oh my God. Hang them really, really shined when I least expected it. Um, to be quite honest with you, I didn't grow up here. You know, a lot has changed over the years, but I have to say, I respect the community so much more today than I ever have. Um, you know, the, the help, the calls, the respect, the care they gave to our kids from sporting events, like soccer teams where, you know, put candles out on the, on the lawn and, you know, it was just so that kept us going. That kept me and the kids going, you know, until we had to kind of, um, you know, take different steps to protect ourselves too. And people who, you know, were coming to the door and leaving food and, you know, we all didn't know, do we wash it? Do we spray it down? Do we, you know, leave it in the garage for a day? Like, we didn't know what to do. Um,

Speaker 1: 18:11

I know it, we didn't know what to do. And so I felt like I had to do something and I was like, well, I can donate gift certificates to Jim's team. And I remember when I dropped them off at the front door, when Jim came home, I didn't even know if I could do that. You know, it was like, yeah, but I, I wanted to get them to you. And I remember I had like half like Brown half blonde hair, like no makeup on. I was like, pull up. And I was just going to just drop the gift certificates and like runaway. And, um, Jim does, I came to the door and he was like, Hey. And once he came, he said, what are you doing? And I'm like, I can't believe like your whole hair. Um, and like people just started getting on bikes and getting into cars and like running out of their homes to S to see and greet Jim at that point, I was like, I'm definitely backing way into my car right now. But like, it was amazing how many people just like ran to him and wanted to say, like, I've been thinking about you, I've been praying for you like this. I'm so sorry. This happened to such a nice family. I mean, I think we collectively as a community just in those prayers and those high vibration that was put around him, I feel like mattered so much

Speaker 4: 19:32

Every, all the prayers and all like the kind words and, and just the emails and even the news stories, you know, I think, you know, they really, um, portrayed what was happening. You know, they weren't fake, you know, this was really happening, you know, to this 49 year old, no underlying conditions guy that's, you know, laying in the ICU, fighting for his life.

Speaker 1: 19:56

It's crazy. So Jim's now on a ventilator and you find yourself temporarily losing the person that you've talked to 20 times a day leaned on for 23 years and you have three kids to take care of, but you found the strength that you never thought you had. What made you decide to go into overdrive and start supporting these healthcare workers? Because I don't think everyone would do that. Kim.

Speaker 4: 20:19

I didn't know. I would do it either. It's, you know, you, you go into this, um, kind of survival mode and, and you have to figure out what to do every day. Like you couldn't be at the hospital. I couldn't be biocide holding his hand, you know, so for me, I had to stay busy. And the only way that I could think about doing anything was okay, well, who's helping him, you know, what do they need? You know, what's going to make it easier for them to be at work with him, with this virus happening and them all afraid to, you know, um, so I think, you know, when that hit my head, I kind of just, you know, went into full speed ahead and, um, kept busy and, and, you know, Jim knows me very well. I, you know, I tend to take on more than I can, but, um, for me, it got me through everything and, um, it made me feel better. It made me feel like I was supporting something and I could give back. Um, I couldn't just sit there. Right? It's not that

Speaker 1: 21:23

That's, that's excellent that you did that. And you kind of gave us all the blueprint for let's all rise up together. And what, what individual thing can I do? What is it that I can do? Can I get a mask for a nurse that I know doesn't have one, can I, um, and there were, you know, we were, what do we have her resources who has, what, what can we get? Because we didn't have supplies. So that was the first thing I saw. And the other part of this incredible story is that these selfless doctors and nurses who bravely put their lives on the line fighting as hard as possible to save you, Jim, I thought this was so powerful. And to quote the New York times again, both Ms. Vocal and Tyler Texiera, a respiratory therapist through unproductive gear and rushed in, we rescued him. We got him back, Ms. Vocal said, this man whose lungs are so bad, we can't have him awake. So they had to re paralyze him to essentially keep them alive. After the shift ended, Ms. Vocal said, I cried the whole way home. She thought of the calls from Mr. Bella's children, similar age to hers. And when I think about this, this doctor had children the same age as yours. And she was crying for you, Jim. And she wasn't crying for herself who had children the same age as yours. And she risked her life every day to save others. And until you go through a situation like this, you really can't comprehend what these medical providers do. And they're important. These medical workers are beyond heroes.

Speaker 4: 22:59

They're beyond heroes. You know, we're still very close to them today. And, you know, I remember that day, clearly, that was the day that, you know, I had to make the phone call to his parents in Florida and, um, to his sister and to my mom. And, you know, that was the first day I collapsed. Oh, I, so

Speaker 1: 23:19

I mean, how much can you do?

Speaker 4: 23:21

Well, I think, you know, when you get to the point where like, he's going to get better, he goes through like bumps in the road. And, um, then you come out, you know, you think he's going to be okay, he's 49. You know, he can fight this and, and every day gets worse. And the nurses, as much as they try to, you know, say, he's going to fight, he's doing better. He's, you know, his oxygen is up today. His oxygen is down little bit, but it's okay. I never once felt like he was going to die until I asked the doctor that day. And it was, um, two weeks into it. And I asked the doctor, I said, you know, you need to tell me straight up. I said, is he gonna make it? And she said, I don't think so. And that's when I hit the ground. Yeah. But still never gave up.

Speaker 1: 24:10

Oh, you did it. And that's in gym is in there, you know? And I think this is where you become this unbelievable superhero. And so at this point, Jim's health starts to really deteriorate. And at one point Jim's lungs were so completely whited out. There was literally no pockets of air. And that's when the doctor told you that most likely Jim wouldn't make it. And you were like, no. And they finally let you in and covered protective gear to see Jim. And that's when you worked your magic. And I believe, and I know it was your love that saved him. So if I'm on death's door, I'm going to request that you come here,

Speaker 2: 24:52

I'll be there. So what happened? You went,

Speaker 1: 24:57

So you went in there and they said they were going to give you like 15 minutes.

Speaker 4: 25:01

Yeah. You know, I stayed in there for almost four hours. And, um, it was so Saifai when I walked into the hospital, I was the only, only non-patient there. It was, it was incredible. It was like nine 30 at night on a Saturday night. And, um, I remember walking in and the halls were empty and I got up there and, you know, I, um, got to his room and they put the protective gear on and nurse Fred was there with him and, and Fred turned to Jim and he hit Jim and he goes, Jim Kim's here. And I was like, did he just hear you? When he goes, course he heard me, we talk all the time. And that kind of set the stage for that night for me. Um, it made me feel comfortable. It made me feel that I could talk to him about everything, anything, everything, anything. Um, and he would hear me. So, you know it to say that they were his support there, you know, it w it's an understatement. Like they were so in tune to who he was, they had pictures everywhere on this, on the walls. And they played his music. And so they know who they knew who Jim was. Right. You know, so that made a huge difference.

Speaker 1: 26:20

And I know one of the stories that I read where you're watching him on face on one of the iPads, and you could see his leg moved and then your dog goes to get his Celtics hat.

Speaker 4: 26:34

Oh yeah. So that was, that was incredible. So that was the day that he woke up and they took him off the paralytic. Okay. And he woke up for a brief moment and the nurse said to him, uh, Carrie said, give me a thumbs up. If you can hear me. And all of the doctors were standing outside the door. There was probably like a group of like 12, like staff and everything. And he turned and gave a thumbs up. And when the doctors saw that, they said he's alive inside. He's so alive, like alive, inside. We are going to do what we can to save this man. And that was the same day where he, you know, his oxygen dropped and they had to bring him back to life and put him back on the paralytic. But during that time, our golden retriever, who's four who never like, nevermind you grabs hats, nothing. He went upstairs to our room, grabbed his Celtics hat that was like on top of a bag and brought it downstairs in his mouth and was staring at us. And my mother-in-law was there. His mom and my mom and my sister in law were there. And just, we, we couldn't, we just took pictures because it was just so incredible. It's like, he knows, he knows, like, it's just, it was bizarre. I have a three-year-old dog. And I was so moved by that story. I was like, that is incredible. Jim, what do you think about when you, like, do you remember, like, do you remember any of this?

Speaker 3: 28:10

No, it's actually, you know, I've heard this story or parts of the story. What hundreds, if not thousands of times over the last six or seven months, and still, to me, it's surreal to know that this is a story about me. It's the only way I can describe it. I share Kim's sentiments about the healthcare workers and, you know, they truly are heroes. They, uh, they, they went above and beyond and they continue to go above and beyond every single day. And they, you know, they put their own lives at risk and caring for other people. And, uh, you know, as I said before, you know, they, um, they, this is such an nasty evil virus that continues to kill hundreds and thousands, but at the same time, this whole epidemic, and this whole pandemic has shown people, all the good that doctors and nurses and respiratory therapists and CNAs and every single medical provider, all they do on a daily basis. So I'm glad that it has shown a light on all that they do all the good that they do for everyone.

Speaker 4: 29:07

I do too. And I think the statement that you sent when you first got out of the hospital about the hospital, I thought it was so powerful and how grateful you were for the care that you received. And it became your mission to, to shine a light on these medical professionals because they deserve to be recognized. And so you basically took the light that was kind of shining on you and went, no, this is going back here. Yeah. And both of you guys still are unbelievable.

Speaker 5: 29:46

This episode of shot at love is brought to you by a call chai rum[inaudible] rom is the world's first botanical rump recognized by the government of Trinidad. And Tobago is having the first new production process for rum in over a century, uh, call chai rum, isn't officially protected trade secrets, only the second such protective process in the Caribbean, since the famed angry store betters by Don Carlos secret in the 1870s. And Kyle chai is available in 44. Us States on rum.com, also available in the Republic of Ireland stuff. You need dot. I cry some today.

Speaker 1: 30:22

Jim, when the news of you being in, in the fight over your life, so many people wanted to do something to support your family, and they just didn't know what to do. And so I decided to pay it forward to the medical providers by donating family portraits. And when I dropped off the gift certificates to, I had mentioned that my best friend had lived on the next street from you. And I said, you know, her dad was a famous doctor at MGH, but he had tragically drowned a year ago. And Kelly wanted, it was very important that she would find a way to honor her dad in the year of the one-year anniversary. So she decided that she was going to run the Boston marathon and she was going to raise funds for the MGH emergency relief fund, because that was her heart. And one day she called me and she said, did you tell the bellows about my fundraising efforts? And I said, no, but you know, they've paid attention to the things that are happening in the community. And I said, I did mention what happened to your dad because they live on the next street. And she's like, well, they donated a thousand dollars to my fund. And we were both so blown away. And Kelly was successful in raising$15,000 because as people like you and your generous spirit and awesome,

Speaker 3: 31:50

Well, that was a no-brainer. I mean, I actually came across that on Facebook if I recall. I mean, that was a no-brainer. I mean, I haven't talked to Kelly and sorry, what 35, 40 years. But to see, I knew her dad and I knew his reputation and he was a remarkable guy. And to see the fact that she was going to raise money in honor, of both her dad and MGH, which obviously has a special place in our hearts, uh, that was a no brainer. So we were happy to help out. And it's nice, you know, we not only due to that, but, um, we got an opportunity to reconnect with Kelly after all those years, which was, yeah.

Speaker 1: 32:21

Yeah. So nice and mean, Dr. Doyle was the best and he worked at MGH for 45 years. Unbelievable. And I mean, he would have been right in there helping people. He was his true healer in every sense of the word. And it's so nice that even though it was horrific situation with the getting COVID Jim, but I've been able to reconnect with you and Kelly's been able to, and I'm sure there's plenty of other people in the community that,

Speaker 3: 32:48

Oh yeah, no doubt. I mean, that was the amazing thing. You know, you try to look for the positives and that's certainly one of the positives that came out of this entire thing was, um, and really some, you know, you know, when I got out of the hospital, when I got out of Spalding and came back, I'll never forget sitting on the couch. Um, and looking at the names, the sheer number, but the names of all of the people that had sent cards and messages and donations. And I think I went through a list of 750 people that first time that I looked at the list and I was just blown away. And, you know, it's amazing because you know, living in a community like this, which I, again, I share Kim sentiments and how wonderful of community we live in. But, you know, you have your, your, you have your Hingham friends and you have your college friends and you have your law school friends and, you know, you're have your soccer friends through the soccer club. And then we, you know, go up to loon all the time. We were alone friends and we had such a large web, uh, a wide web and to see all those people come together at a time of need was truly humbling and just remarkable.

Speaker 6: 33:48

It was awesome. Yeah. Great.

Speaker 1: 33:50

It really was. And you saw the best of humanity in the worst, you know, you're really sure. And you saw people's true intentions and boy gem, you know, I know the, you never wanted some of these videos where you got so much attention

Speaker 3: 34:06

And I'll tell you a funny story about that. He allowed to swear on a podcast. I'll tell you a funny story about that. So as you know, Carrie, despite doing the podcast, I'm a pretty private person by nature. So I, uh, and this is one of my favorite stories. So when I got to Spalding, I don't have a lot of clear memories of everything that happened at MGH because, you know, when you're in a coma, you're sedated and that it takes quite a while for the sedatives to reverse. So my memories really pick up, I have some memories and probably a lot of hallucinations of MGH, but when I got to Spalding, um, the first thing I remember is looking at the calendar on the wall and seeing that it was April and I was clearly blown away by that having gotten into the hospital in March. But the second thing that I remember is it was the first day I was there. I got there mid afternoon and my roommate, Harold, nice, nice guy. He was in the bed next to me with a half a curtain between the two of us. And as you can probably imagine if anybody's been in a hospital, you have those TVs, uh, up on the wall, he's got a TV and I got a TV and I think it was on one of the news channels. And Harold, I really wasn't paying attention to inherit, looks at me and says, wait, look up at the TV. And I look up at the TV. He goes, that's you? I said, what?

Speaker 6: 35:14

I said, what is my wife done?

Speaker 3: 35:17

And that was the first time I had any indication that there had been any media coverage and then, Oh yeah, she couldn't tell me. And then, so I called her and I said, Kim, you got something to tell me. She says, yeah, well, yeah, there's been a little bit of news coverage. And she says, one other thing I gotta tell ya. And I said, what's that? She goes, well, the New York times might be calling you too. So that was an eye opener for me drugged up. So I didn't,

Speaker 4: 35:40

Well, they did a really nice job and not New York times story really well-written well-written. And, um, that, that was very powerful and it really told, updated people on what was happening, what had happened and the video of Jim being wheeled out and him waving and all the doctors and nurses clapping and lining up, it became way bigger than you Jim fellow. You know what I mean? Like last night

Speaker 3: 36:12

That 40,000 people looked at that. I had no idea. Yeah.

Speaker 4: 36:14

Like 40,000. Wow. Yeah. Well, and that, and that's

Speaker 3: 36:18

Kind of the way I felt about it. I, again, I had a lot of reluctance about it. Um, but my feeling at the time was is that if it shines a light on COVID and, you know, keep somebody else safe and people take precautions as a result of my situation, you know, again, it's all good by me. Right.

Speaker 4: 36:35

You could see those nurses and the people, these medical providers sobbing, sobbing for someone that they didn't really know. But I guess I did know. I mean, well, they knew me through Kim, right? Yeah, yeah. Right. And your ability to be like, not on my watch, no key is going to make it. And there was no possible way he was leaving me. No, I always said like, you know, you know what I do? Well, he doesn't and what he does. Well, I don't, there's no way that we could split up. Oh. You know, and I can see that. I can see that from just your emails. Like I can see who does, you know, there's just certain things that we've grown to, to know over the years, you know, and respect each other for, um, you know, and that takes more than 20 years. Right? Well, it is, like I said, the most beautiful love story. And I think in sickness or in health, that you have got to find someone who is going to be your advocate, not going to leave your side. And like you said, the New York times I be calling, you know, you didn't know how it handled that, but if it became bigger than, than Jim and you, you know,

Speaker 3: 37:54

Well, you know, it's funny, I've been sitting here listening to the two of you talk and

Speaker 2: 37:58

Which is fine because really, I don't really have much of a memory of it as it should be. But

Speaker 3: 38:02

I think the reality is, and this'll go to your, you know, the, the shot at love podcast is that as I thought about what I went through, you know, a really is a lot like a marriage in some respects in the sense that, you know, things look good and they don't look good. Things look good. They don't look good. You're not going to make it. You're going to die. You live in. And I think the lesson there is you just got to keep fighting and just keep fighting through it. Yeah. You got to just keep trying, you just got to keep trying and don't give up

Speaker 4: 38:28

So grateful every day I wake up and he's next to me, it's a good day, honestly now. I mean, no, but when you go, you know, you go into your own like little getaways and nights here and there and you're like, yes, he's gone for the night and you still will do that. But now it's, you know, when you don't have someone who's been by your side, literally by your side for 23 years and they're gone for 32 days and then they're back, you really have a different perspective on life. No matter what, it's, you know, every day I wake up and I say to myself, you know, I've woken up with a smile every day, since he's been home.

Speaker 1: 39:11

Wow. There's a nice gift from them. There's a silver lining from all of the absolute hell that you guys went through. And in life, there are good days and bad days, and this pandemic has changed each and every one of us. And so much for the two of you, Jim, has your perspective changed about life or have you reprioritize your bucket list?

Speaker 3: 39:31

Yeah, there's a lot on my bucket list that unfortunately, as a result of COVID, we can't do right now. So my bucket list is there. Um, yeah, no for sure, Carrie, and I think that there is a silver lining in this entire thing, and I think you do reprioritize what is important in life? I think that, as you said, you know, certainly the silver lining in all of this is the fact that you know, that the pace of life, to some extent and work and everything has slowed down. So you've had an opportunity really, to spend more time with your kids and your family and listen, you know, it's, it's easy. What I've come to realize too, is that it is easy to lose sight of that. You know, you get, you know, I, I'm an attorney and I have high pressure situations and, and a difficult job at times. And you know, you do your best to try to keep everything in perspective. And I'll tell you, there have been days where I've felt like that that is getting away. And those are the days that I, and I haven't done it a lot, but those are the days that I might look at that New York times article, or I might pull up that video to remind myself of how lucky I am and the need to, um, you know, keep perspective.

Speaker 1: 40:31

That's great. Yeah. I mean, at this point you have that it's like that happened. That's that's I know it feels like a movie sometimes, and that you can't believe that this really did happen to you guys, but that will shape you and change you forever,

Speaker 4: 40:46

For sure. Definitely. And all the same,

Speaker 1: 40:49

Your relationship truly exemplifies what a married couple should be. An incredibly you gave back to your community during the most challenging time in your life. And that proves that the world is truly a great place. Thank you so much for sharing your story today.

Speaker 3: 41:07

Our pleasure. Thanks for having us care. Thanks, Carrie,

Speaker 1: 41:09

Do you guys have any updates of the, um, Bello GoFund me or any plans for the future that you'd like to share or where people can find you or not really? No.

Speaker 3: 41:20

I mean, I, you know, we still are, um, I'm sitting on some money in our quote unquote foundation that we have that we're going to get back to MGH at the right time. And as I, you know, we look for the right opportunities to give back to healthcare providers, to back to the community. And, um, you know, um, I'm excited about the fact that I'm going to be getting together with, um, you know, one of the doctors who was my primary care provider in the near future to have a drink or two with him. And, and I think when all of this comes down, you know, we'll get together with everybody at MGH and, you know, give them the check and they can put it to use the way they see fit. Yeah.

Speaker 1: 41:52

Yeah. Absolutely. Things are getting worse. Again. We need to do our best to stay, stay strong. Right. Well, Jim, again, I'm still surprised you're here. Talk about a dream[inaudible] but I'm so glad you're MGH COVID miracle. And I know you're so very proud of your wife, Kim.

Speaker 3: 42:18

She's incredible. She's a warrior. That's the word that I used when I got out of the hospitals that she's a warrior and you're right, Carrie, if God forbid, you're in a similar situation, you want that warrior fighting for you.

Speaker 1: 42:28

You do and be behind every strong man is a strong woman. And that is that is you Kim. I can't tell you how much. I appreciate both of you guys being here today. Thanks. Thanks Carrie. Thanks for now this week, gender tips, number one, always lead with a generous spirit. Look for ways to share and look for ways to get what you give comes back to you. Tenfold. Number two, stay away from toxic relationships. You are not healing them. They are making you sick. When looking for relationships, focus on creating a healthy one. Number three, sometimes you have to fight through some bad days to earn the best days of your life. This is what shot at love is here for, to help you find love. Keep up the commitment to yourself and commit to helping someone else by sharing this podcast. Remember to stay safe and stay tuned for more episodes. And if you like this show, please leave a five-star review. I'm Carrie Brett, and we'll see you next time.[inaudible].