Somethin' Like Sunday School
A podcast discovering and conversing about the people of the Bible and other fun, Bible facts. If Sunday School and VBS had a baby.
Somethin' Like Sunday School
Like a River; Beauty for Ashes
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SPEAKER_05:This episode of Something Like Sunday School is being brought to you by Bougie Bully Trade Lines LLC, headed up by the CEO, Angela Agnew. If you find yourself shy of the credit score needed to qualify for your dream home, that land you've been looking at, the new car you wanted to purchase, personal loans, and much more, and you don't have the desire to wait on a complete full credit repair, try the temporary credit boost of Bougie Bully Trade Lines with the results in as fast as 14 to 21 days. Get better odds of approval with the addition of positive accounts with zero balances added to your credit profile. With the ability to increase your approval by as much as 75%. Yes, 75%. Contact Angela Agnew at bougiebully at gmail.com or 1980-677-1595. Become a part of over 900 satisfied customers and 80 homes closed by using their services. Allow them to bully those bureaus on your behalf by using Bougie Bully Trade Lines LLC. They look forward to working with you. What's up, everybody, and welcome back to your favorite podcast, Something Like Sunday School. I am Purpose Williams, and tonight, today, whatever time you're listening, I believe you're gonna be blessed. As always. As always, on every episode, I'm very excited about this one. This has been a long time coming, but it's been beautiful. Just watching everything happen. So now y'all are gonna get a little a little peek, a little insight on uh how everything is has been made so beautiful. I got here with me tonight. Y'all know her she's not a guest anymore. Go ahead and tell the people what your name is, sis.
SPEAKER_04:Hey everybody, I'm Ari. Talk to y'all today.
SPEAKER_05:Intercessor. My God, today. And I have Pastor Tim. Y'all heard him too.
SPEAKER_00:That's regular member, Tim.
SPEAKER_05:Pastor Tim. In the regular body. Yeah, playing games, yeah. Y'all gonna see. Y'all gonna see. And a very special person on here tonight. What's your name, sis? Alicia. Alicia. We're gonna find out just who Alicia is. Amen. Praise God. Amen. Tonight you know we like to come out of the Bible right away. We we are uh a Bible-based podcast for sure. We like to come right out of scripture. And tonight we're gonna go to Isaiah, the 61st chapter, the first to the third verse. Isaiah is found in the Old Testament. For those of you who want to keep that in mind as you find it, um, we read from KJV, which is one of my favorites. Do you guys want to read from another version?
SPEAKER_03:I usually go through NLT because it's easier for me to translate, but you know, we can go with KJV.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, come on, NLT. Come on. Go ahead and read it for us, sis.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, okay. All right, so um chapter, Isaiah chapter 61, verse one. Uh it says good news for the oppressed. And verse one reads, The spirit of the sovereign Lord is upon me, for the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted and to proclaim that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed. Number two, he has sent me to tell those who mourn that the time of the Lord's favor has come, and with it the day of God's anger against their enemies. Verse three, to all who mourn in Israel, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, a festive praise instead of despair, and in their righteousness they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for his own glory.
SPEAKER_05:I want to read uh the KJV. It says, The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because the Lord hath anointed me to preach the good tidings unto the meek. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that abound, so beautiful, to proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord and the day of vengeance of our Lord, to comfort all that mourn, to appoint unto them that mourn to Zion, to give unto them beautiful ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness, that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified. I think that's so um beautiful. Always one of my favorite scriptures. But of course, like the old people say, well, the wise people say you live and you learn, and the more you grow in God, the more the scripture means to you. Um, the part that we're focusing on uh was beautiful ashes and binding up the brokenhearted for those that mourn. For those of you who were with us before, we did an episode a while ago that was called Like a River. And I talked to my brother and sister who had just experienced the transitioning of their spouses. Uh, I had, like I said, on there, I was very fascinated with how they handled everything. It was very godly. And even as a Christian, it was it was encouraging to me to see how beautiful they they you know went through that process. Even their children, I found that fascinating. You would think that uh the kids would be so down, you know, losing the parent and losing the parents so young, you know. But looking at them, it definitely was a Holy Ghost, like the old saying, say a Holy Ghost time. And just, you know, uh, like I said before, Myron and I were with Ari at the uh at the hospital. We went with her to be with her and to see Rich. And she was just so chill, you know. Me and Myron was freaking out more than her. It's in the car. I was like, oh God, Myron, what are we gonna say? And then because you know, you don't want to say the wrong thing and you want to say something, but really it's just more about being prison and more about praying for people. And we got in there, she was fine. The children was fine. I think, you know, me and me and Mari kept looking at each other like wow. And then we stepped out one time, like, dang, like that is insane. Yeah. So it was beautiful. Uh, we talked to Timmy. He was fine, the boys was fine, and even how they dealt with it, um, you just didn't see like a sadness. There was not a cloud of darkness over them, just like with Ari and the babies. And um, I felt like people should know about that. And especially then it turned out so many people were dealing with that. And the testimonies that we got coming in from that was just amazing. So now we get to we get to catch up and see what has transpired. Um, and looking at them, we all go to to church together, and we got to experience uh experience another side of this. I'm gonna let them tell it though, before I tell it all. Well, the part I know is I can't tell it all. This is what I see without being nosy about, you know what I'm saying? So I'm I'm gonna ask them this question. The first question is after dealing with the transition of a spouse and dealing with trauma from previous relationships, how easy was it to hear God about uh uh being ordained or being betrothed to another person?
SPEAKER_00:So um for me, um God immediately started dealing with me about uh the transition of my first wife. Um I wanna say I received a word from Pastor. Um she passed away on a Saturday. Um we come back home Sunday and then I I um bump into my pastor Monday, Monday morning. And we it was a group of us talking the the some kind of where I ended up in church parking lot, I can't remember. I don't know if I went to the store or something. Some kind of where I ended up in the church parking lot and I was leaving, and the whole um everybody was coming in to work. The staff was coming in that day. So everybody we kind of just was in the parking lot talking. Pastor pulled up uh after everybody else, and um he joined us. And during that conversation, it was just a chill conversation, they just checking checking up on me, seeing my face for the first time. And um he told me that God was gonna give me a filler. He was gonna provide me with a filler, and that's the term he used. And it was it was weird to me. I wasn't I wasn't thrown off by that. I I received the word, but it was the terminology that that got me. It stuck out and it made me remember um when he said filler. He said, God gonna provide a filler, somebody's gonna come in and and and fill that space. And so I think because he planted that seed so early, um, once I got past the um funeral and the business of death, um as as I began to sit back down with God and start having conversations, God started dealing with me about the position of Phoenicia. That she was no longer my wife, that she was my sister in Christ. And that transition and uh those conversations led to uh a naive list of me just telling God what I want in a wife. And I'm saying naive because I'm thinking like down the road, yeah. Like I felt like I need to conquer what I was doing. Yeah, and so in my mind I was gonna have to conquer and say I did something and then get then get a wife, and um, God had other plans, but um, you start dealing with me in those conversations. He started dealing with me in those conversations, and I could I I could just hear that word of a filler, yeah. And so um it wasn't too long after, um, I want to say February, March. Yeah, I was at church serving, doing sound check, and he I looked over and he showed me her. And we go to church together, but I I didn't know who she was. I knew she was um Tay's sister, but I didn't know who she was. I I didn't know her name. Um illuminating her. Really, and she had she had this big smile like she got messed up.
SPEAKER_05:She always has.
SPEAKER_00:And she lit the room up with that smile and I got out of there.
SPEAKER_07:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:I'm like, huh? I knew exactly what it was. I was not confused. It was very clear, it was so clear that I got out of the man, dude.
SPEAKER_05:I was just talking to you.
SPEAKER_00:It was so soon.
SPEAKER_05:But you said something interesting though, when you were just talking then. Uh I did, I was laughing at you calling yourself naive, but what you said uh makes sense that it happened so quick because you said you received it. Yeah, I did. The scripture is clear. I received it. You prayed and you believe, that's when you receive it. So you receive it, and he came right on.
SPEAKER_00:It was it was very easy though. Um, it was very easy because of the love that I felt during the the time that my first wife was sick, the the death of my first wife, the the love I felt during the process of putting together um funeral arrangements, the the church that we did it at, our church family, family, the love I felt so like it was so easy to listen to God because I've been listening to God during all that time. So it made it it was easy to trust. I I spent the next four days talking to God about it. So and he showed me so many different ways that that's what he was saying. Yeah. And so I sat on it some more, just made sure. I just wanted to make sure I I wasn't at that point I wasn't scared. I was I didn't want to fumble it.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Because now all the pressure on me.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Like God, God spoke, and now I gotta I gotta see this thing out. And I don't want to be the one that you know fumble it. So I had to I had to sit on it a while and see what was gonna be the move.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. That's that's so funny to me though. Like um it's funny how people can be hidden from you. You be in plain sight of each other, but you know you be hidden in a in a certain position over there. Cause our church we go to right way, we definitely we all know each other. Yeah, yeah. Because it's such a loving church, and we pride on ourselves on getting to know one another. So uh we always talked about Aaron. I always talked about your smile as well. And we talked about you as his sister. So we was like, yeah, I was like, yeah, I think she's cool, you know.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, yeah, right.
SPEAKER_05:So, you know, we were looking, you know, whatever. But um, I you know, I had nothing bad to say about it. Like you say, I knew you, but I didn't know you. But what I did know, I felt like you was uh a a good person, you know. And um when the word got it wrong, because this this blessed man of God didn't tell us and I get you know we respect with privacy and stuff.
SPEAKER_00:Well I messed up though it was so fast, everything was going so fast. There's a lot of people that that I didn't have on my yeah, it wasn't good. It was smooth, yeah. Very, very smooth. It was very smooth, but it was it was fast, it was very fast, very smooth. It wasn't it was it would have been faster than that if it was up to me, but it just how it took off. It like it took on a life of its own, and we didn't have to do much, and that's kind of threw me off.
SPEAKER_05:But that's beautiful though. That's beautiful, that's a beautiful testimony, Pop. The Lord said he hastened his word to perform it, yeah. And it happened. Like, um, so why did you run? What what made you run?
SPEAKER_00:What made me run? How soon it was? I thought, well, it was probably about four months since my wife passed. And he said, wife. And so to be completely honest, um I had I never been alone. Um me and Phoenicia um met at 17 years old in high school. We stayed together well until she passed. And then from that, once you get, like I say, once you get past the once you get past the business of death, and I call the business of death, dealing with the funeral home, dealing with life insurance, dealing with all these different things. And you know, people they'll they'll they're gonna tell you, I'm sorry for your loss, but after that, it's just straight paperwork, man. It's like, and that's to me sometimes that can be overwhelming to keep saying the same thing over and over again. You gotta say, okay, this is what I'm doing, and I'm just trying to, you know, get everything in order. And so once I got past that, and that kind of was like a load off, and now I'm like actually dealing with being by myself. Um I'm like, what what is that? I don't know what I don't know what this is. Like I wasn't struggling with it, I was just trying to figure out who you was and what a single man is. I went from a kid to like married. Yeah. And so I never knew what being a single man was, so I was, you know. New territory. I was new, like I went out and I'm like, oh my god, look at the buttons. Not alone. I'm for after about a week, and I and that's a real conversation I had with God's lake. So I can turn and look like that. I can do that. I'm talking to God. About a week later, he came back and I I wanna say from the time I said that we we had the conversations. I don't know if he showed me her yet, but I don't he hadn't shown me her yet. But we had the conversations. And I was just saying about what I wanted in a a woman or an ex wife. And he came back and said, Well, you gotta be a husband in order to want this from a woman. And so it wasn't about me uh getting what I want. It was more about being ready. Yeah. And so I I ain't getting about a week. I ain't getting nobody week. That sounds like the Lord knows you ain't gonna scoop you up. But really, um man, it wasn't, it ain't, I don't, the the the guys that hanging on to that lifestyle, I don't know what it is. It's not for me, I guess. Because it wasn't like I was just the dog never came out. Yeah, yeah. I don't understand how and maybe because I I I love marriage. I love marriage, I love the institute of marriage, I love the covenant. Yeah. Um, and so I never got to where I was just that dog or whatever that is that that they say we are.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:I think I it it is, um, but I don't think I fed it enough. I say that. Yeah, oh good. I I and the reason why I say that, um, I don't want to mess your questions up. Oh no. The reason why I say that because when God showed me her, uh and after sitting on it for a few months, now it's time for me to To approach her, I had to sit down and think about what I was gonna do and what I was gonna say. Because it's different. Um, you if you enter a room with a hundred women and you walk in there saying, I wanna find a wife, and you can just do a numbers game. If a hundred women, ten percent, that's ten women, and you narrow it down from there. So you can just walk around, so you can just walk around speaking.
SPEAKER_05:He's so save, he's still talking about the tithe. But ten percent. Oh, and right, folks. Amen. Praise God.
SPEAKER_00:But like if you say 10%. I'm just throwing easy numbers at them. But if if if you if you're doing it, if you're doing it like that, um you're bound to find somebody. Um but you I can go, I can, I can approach her any kind of way that I want to. And if she says no, I can just go to the next woman. But when there's only one, you gotta step right up. Right, good. You can't mess that up. You can't mess that up. There's only one. When there's only one, you can't mess that up.
SPEAKER_03:Look, she like so I had to move.
SPEAKER_00:I had I had to think about what I was gonna say. And then, for whatever reason, I came straight from a child to marriage and stayed in marriage and back to where I was at. Never had no player, never was a player, never, you know, been with multiple women, nothing like that. But for whatever reason, it's trying to come out of me. Like when I'm thinking about what I'm gonna say to her. Uh the player. The player, it's kind of like, where did it come from? I'm like, I don't, I don't know where that's coming from. And I really had to like grab it, like, no, what was where this coming from? And it's so interesting. And that's why I say the flesh is always there. You don't have to feed, yeah. That's it. You don't have to nurture it. It's there. Okay. It's a gremlin, it's gonna survive. It's gonna survive on its own.
SPEAKER_05:What you would have said, that man would have said, uh, you must be tired.
SPEAKER_00:Probably would have lifted my rich rich princess. You already made me slide in the DM. She went. She's getting out of church. She's taking off as we do.
SPEAKER_03:As we like, we don't want to linger around. For what?
SPEAKER_00:But yeah, it's it's it's there, man. And and you have to be careful, and when you see it, you have to attack it. Yeah, you can't take it lightly. You have to attack it with the word, and you know, that's that would that's what I was on. That I was trying to make sure I did everything right on my side because I saw what God was doing. And I didn't want to be the one that messed it up.
SPEAKER_05:Man, that's beautiful that you said that though, that the the flesh is still there. Yeah, and you have to kill it and not feed it. You but you would have missed that now, you know? Yeah if you went another way. That's crazy though. Put out his best player I'm saying, I'm like, where this coming from?
SPEAKER_00:I don't mean feel right. It didn't feel right, but I'm glad I did that instead of just walking up to a thing and just going with the flow. I I I thought about it, and what I what I came up with was I give her something that she deserved to have. I give her a compliment. I give her a compliment, and if even if she's if even if she rejects me, she deserved to have it. And that's that's interesting.
SPEAKER_05:That's that's good. Yeah, I never never heard that before.
SPEAKER_04:All right, man. Okay, good love. Teach us.
SPEAKER_05:God, teach them, teach 'em, man. Y'all hear that? Trying to be husbands. That's right. Got to do it the right way, do it the godly way. That man said the flesh was rising up. He was rising up. That's so funny, Pastor Tim. He was rising up. Praise God that you're resisting. Yeah. So, so what did he say to you, Lee? Do you mind divulging that?
SPEAKER_03:Um, in in my inbox?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:Um, so it's funny story, but just full transparency. Uh, we were in church, by the way, when I got the inbox, and it says, it said, well, I don't have it right here in front of me, but it says something like, What's up, Alicia? Um, I think you're a beautiful person. I want to get to know you. And I'm like, so I shouldn't have been checking messenger in church anyway.
SPEAKER_00:Wait, why was he sending in church? No, I went to the morning server. I went to the early server. I see what I already had a chance.
SPEAKER_03:I was at 10 o'clock. Okay. And I don't know what even made me open my messenger. Because I don't get notifications for messenger, just every now and then I'll go back there and look at it. And I saw that, and I was just like, huh? And um, Vanessa was sitting next to me. I was like, it's hot in here. I was like, did you get flat? Like, I'm like, come on. I was like, this man been hacked. Because I didn't believe that he was messaging me. And I'm just like, so I looked up at the um production booth to see if my brother Tay was there because I wanted to like know, like, hey, is Tim here? So I text Tay, X, is Tim at church? And he was like, no, he was here earlier, but he's not here now. Yeah. So after church, I go to Tay and was like, look, I was like, can you text him? I don't know if he's been hacked, and I don't want to respond to him. Right. You know, like what's what's happening here? T okay? Yeah. Just wasn't believing that you know, that happened.
SPEAKER_00:But um so I get a screenshot of my message. So I get a screenshot of my message from him saying, I think you might have been hacked.
SPEAKER_03:No.
SPEAKER_05:Tim said that's me.
SPEAKER_03:The Holy Spirit has hacked me. He was like, no, it's me. And you know, basically, like, tell her I'm not offended. Just because I don't want to be responding. I knew he his wife had recently transitioned, yeah, and I just didn't want to assume that you know he was reaching out. So yeah, I thought the computer had done got a hold of him and and, you know, playing with me. So I didn't want to respond. But once I did find out it was him, um, you know, just we started talking and it kind of piggyback off of what he said about him being a husband. Um, what a lot of people don't know about me is I was in a marriage before, and I was married for 19 years. Um and just in a nutshell, it was not a healthy marriage. Um I I for one, I became a mom. I was a teenage mom. I got married at the age of 20. And again, it just wasn't a a a healthy marriage. And I can just remember saying several times in that marriage that um I'm never getting married again. Uh, but of course, you know, after some time being single, um, you know, I I I I dated with discernment. I wasn't trying to, you know, I didn't want to date around, but at the same time I didn't want to be a fool, you know, because I, you know, it had been a long time, but at the same time I still didn't want to be a fool. Um, and I dated, and like I said, just the people that I talked to, it was just like no. Like I was not ignoring red flags. And so I was like, you know, Lord, I surrender my dating life to you. And that's exactly what I did. I surrendered it to him. Um and then just fast forward back a little bit from that. Um you know, I was talking to God, and he reminded me, he was like, I created you to be a wife. You were created to be a wife. So I received that and I held on to that, and that's was another reason that I surrendered my dating life to him. And shortly after that, I had a prayer confession that I was praying for the type of husband that I wanted. And you know Sierra. Okay. I did, you know, I didn't know it was gonna be that soon, but at the same time, I had a prayer of the type of husband that I wanted because of just what I dealt with dating. I didn't want that stuff. I know I didn't want that. So I was like, okay, I'm gonna sit down and write the type of husband that I want. And you know, God, you know, he almost nailed it. I told him that he meant to be the part, okay. That's right, you know. I did. I showed him my prayer. And he almost like nailed it. Like I said, the only thing that was it was just the hype part. But you know, that's what I love to say. God has a sense of humor. Yeah. I said a man that was taller than me, and he's just kind of slightly taller than me.
SPEAKER_05:So that's why I say, exactly. He ain't say sure than easy by the height, did it. That's right.
SPEAKER_04:That's right.
SPEAKER_05:I think, yeah, go ahead.
SPEAKER_04:Oh, I'm sorry. How long was it? Um, how long were you single before TM came in?
SPEAKER_03:Um, so I divorced at the end of 2022. And um, it took a while to to adjust to well, I was separated from him a whole year prior, but it took a while to adjust that, okay, I'm no longer a wife. Um so from what was that, 2024? 2024. So uh a little under two years, I guess we could say um I was single, but during that time is when God revealed that I was created to be a wife. Because honestly, y'all, I I thought I was gonna be outside. And did you? Yeah, I did. Yeah, well, it wasn't for me, though. It wasn't it really wasn't for me because I was just like, man, I gotta go out there and talk to people. Like, I really don't want to do this. Like, this is not me. Like, I I didn't, but like I said, he he came along unexpectedly, you know. And then the way it happened, it was just like, like I said, the discernment was there, but there was nothing, no, no red flags, no nothing. Like everything was just clear as day. And then after he and I had talked for maybe a week, it's like I felt like I knew him already. Like we just got close real quick, and it just felt like he just belonged there. Like we we belonged together, you know. I like I said, I knew his wife transitioned, but it it was just like it felt so right. I I don't know what other words to use there. That's how it looked too. Um it looked like that. And it was effortless. Like I I was myself, he was himself. It was, you know, I I told him what I had been through, it didn't run him away. You know, he had he knew I had three grown sons that didn't run him away, you know. It just all felt so right. So, you know, he asked me how I felt about marriage, and I was like, I'm still team marriage because God already said that I was created to be a wife, so I'm a wife, you know. So it it it it it was it was and has been beautiful. It looks beautiful. We can see it clearly.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:Oh god.
SPEAKER_05:Oh god, yeah, definitely. Aaron I talked about it quite often, you know. Yeah, and we noticed the changes in him. It was so funny. I said, girl, you seen Tim change his profile pick? I said, it looked like he ready. I heard Kelly, it seemed like he ready.
SPEAKER_04:But um he had his hair different, wasn't he? Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:A different color. I said, what's going on? It was so fun to different light. A different light. Exactly. Absolutely. Yeah, and uh, you know, not saying that he wasn't, you know, lit before, but it was like a newness, you know. He was renewed and it was it was beautiful to see. Yeah, he had a little pepping step. He always, you know, be joking or whatever, but he was much more quieter, you know. He was more, I ain't gonna say he was in the shadows, but he was just, you know, laid back, yeah. Very laid back doing what he do in the house of the Lord, but he just had a different light. His son said, girl, what is going on? I mean, I be the one. There she's holding righteous, you know. She's so so eloquent before the Lord. I just be saying stuff.
SPEAKER_04:I be like, girl. But Timmy went from faith to faith. Faith to faith. But we do call y'all the blueprint. We do. Like we be watching y'all. It just looks so easy. It do. And I will say that y'all are very encouraging because, like someone said before, like, um, your husband might not be a right way. And I was like, well, I want my husband to be under my pastor. I don't want to have to train him and fool him and all that kind of stuff. I want us to kind of know what teaching he's under.
SPEAKER_00:I wanted my wife to be a right way.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah. That's how I want to be. So y'all make her. Oh, yeah. It's possible. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. I said, um, like I said, I used to be telling Ari just anything. I said, this, this man of God. I didn't say that. I said another word. It wasn't no cousin word, but you know. I said, this man ain't said nothing. He'd walk around smiling. And we check, we were checking in on him, you know what I'm saying? How you and the boys, man? How y'all doing? Did y'all cry today? I think he said that's what he asked for.
unknown:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:No wonder y'all doing. I'm doing fine. I bet you is. I bet you is.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. God was talking to me and showed it to me. Yeah. And like I say, I sat on it from I want to say that was the end of February, maybe March. I sat on it until like the end of May. And I want to say it was May 26th is when I made um.
SPEAKER_05:Yes.
SPEAKER_00:When I actually sent the um the message. And so from that moment it shot off. Yeah. And so um a lot of people was wondering why we went on ahead and got married. I I had boxes that needed to be checked. No boxes was checked.
SPEAKER_07:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:And so it wasn't no reason to I was. So I did have a time to where I felt like that. I felt like um I was I was moving too fast from what I've been through, not from where I was at. But I was moving too fast for my past. And God quickly um let me know that you're not doing it on the speed of people, you're on my time. And so my time is timeless. So if if you if you wanna if you wanna just wait on the proof of man and wait on that time, then so be it. You can do it. But if you're on my time, I'm gonna I'm gonna speed it up for you. And so uh the stuff that I was concerned about, my pastor getting godly wisdom from him, making sure that he back up what I'm what I'm what I believe I'm hearing from God and the union that I want to do and create. Um my our kids, none of none of that stopped, none of that hindered, even her. Like, once I made the um sent the message, she received it. When we talked, it was all gas, no breaks. Yeah, and so I had I had nothing in front of me except you know the the trickery of the enemy just like oh it hadn't been a year.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, it was like so.
SPEAKER_00:I'm gonna wait around for a year, what's that's gonna change?
SPEAKER_05:Right, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:It still don't change anything, especially if my heart not like my heart is that I want to marry her. So what's what what does that change if I wait a year or two years and I'll just be waiting to please the the outside. Yeah, and you don't live for the outside.
SPEAKER_05:Absolutely not. Because why now you live for you?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and they don't they're not gonna make you happy. So and the things the the man, what she's brought to to our family been remarkable, like the like I and I to I tell her, I was like, um, you make me happier because I was happy. I wasn't saying. And so I was like, you make me happier. And so um the place that I was in, I was fine. I was good. But it was greater. And so I could see that and everything she brought, the the knowledge and uh a woman's touch that I could never, I could never, I don't want it. Yeah. I don't want I don't want to I don't want to be the woman's touch. So she brought something that I couldn't do, and that's a beautiful I'm fine with that. That's fine. That's beautiful, Leisha.
SPEAKER_05:Taking in there, yeah. And that can see it though. Yeah, thank you. Beautiful smile, beautiful person. And easy, uh, it's easy to say, and easy to see rather. Um what did okay, did did Holy Spirit reveal to you, Leisha, that he was your husband? He did.
SPEAKER_03:So I don't know what it is about me and water and Holy Spirit, but Holy Spirit, I was in the shower and Holy Spirit revealed that he was gonna be my husband. You know, like, yeah, that's your husband, you know, because I'm praying. We talking about marriage, and like I said, it felt right, but I just still want to be sure. And yeah, that night when I heard that from God, I was just like, okay, you know, I don't like he said, all gas, no breaks, and we were moving with it. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:So because I personally probably like, boy, you ain't you not here yet. What you mean?
unknown:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Are you bored?
SPEAKER_03:And it wasn't gonna be no uh what they're kind of like rebounding.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, right. And that's why I was trying to make sure. Yeah, I I knew what I heard, I knew what I felt. Um, I was confident in that, but I also I feel like the God's approval can stand up against anything. So I'm gonna try it. Yeah, so I'm gonna try it against everything. Yeah, so yeah. I did godly counsel, I I did my kids. Because if it was God's approval, he gonna work it out across the board. That's right. He's not gonna just work it out for me. He's gonna work it out for everybody. So I I I tried it. I tried it against everything, and it was it was everything was coming up. I was so nervous through it all and and introducing her to different people, even the kids. Man, the the way she was introduced to the kids was Golly. Like gone. I went to my older son first because I think I took her out on one date and I felt like I was creeping around. I didn't like that. I done like walking up and told him I be back and I don't like the way that feels. So I had to tell one of them. I told my oldest boy, and um when I was telling him, he said, I know who it is.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, and it was me. He said he started noticing me at church. The oldest son I said it.
SPEAKER_00:He said he didn't. Like during the quiet time, during the quiet, when God told me, showed me her, I didn't talk to anybody. I kept it to myself the whole time. I did, I did the show, I want to say in April. Yeah, and I'm doing the show. I'm thinking like in the middle. And I said something toward the end of the show, like, yeah, y'all gonna see some stuff coming. And that's what that's what my mind was because God showed it to me. And so um I I kept it to myself the entire time. So I never told anyone. And he, I want to say he maybe been the first person that I told. Yeah, and so I wanted to, um, I just didn't feel right. And so I told him and he's like, I bet y'all know who it is. And he's like, show me a picture of it. He's and he told me, I tried to show him a picture, a different picture from what she looked like that day.
SPEAKER_07:Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_00:And he was like, Um, oh, he he called out the how do she had.
SPEAKER_06:Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_00:And so I was like, Oh, yeah, you really know who she is. He's like, Yeah, I've been noticing her a lot. And she she looked good for you. That's what he told me.
SPEAKER_03:I was like, She do. Absolutely.
SPEAKER_00:It blew me away. So, like, everything was just and even with our boxes was getting checked.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. Yeah. With me telling my sons, like, they've always just known me and their dad for so long. And when I told them, it was just like, yeah, you know, there was no backlash or anything. It was just straight like, I'm happy for you, mom. And even when I said that I was getting married, and they was just like shocked, but they was like, for real? And but they know the type of person or type of mama that they have too. So they they can trust my judgment that I'm just not out here just, you know, jumping into a marriage with anybody. So they just very supportive. That's beautiful.
SPEAKER_04:So, what y'all telling me is that it's okay that when God says prove ye me, it's okay for me to test and test. Yes.
SPEAKER_00:Absolutely. He's not contradicting to the word. Um He wants you to try Him at His beard. And so if you even even in Um the days of Jesus, when He will heal somebody, go say, Go see the physician.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:He'll tell you, go see the physician. He didn't say keep it a secret. Go see. I want them to know that I healed you.
SPEAKER_07:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:And they need to know. Prove it. Prove it. He that's right. God has no problem with proving his word. Yeah. He has no problem proving his word. So that's that's exactly what I did. I wanted to see.
SPEAKER_05:It's just beautiful. It really is. Uh, it takes me back to again when y'all had first experienced the transition. And and I said, you know, I noticed them, but I also looked at the children. And you would expect the kids to be, you know, just so heartbroken and just so down. And neither one of y'all kids was like that. Her babies wasn't like that, your boys wasn't like that. It was just such peace, you know what I'm saying? And even hearing them saying um that they miss their dad or whatever. And it it was still wasn't like uh a broken heart, at least, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, it was just a piece and it was tangible.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:It was tangible. And you know it it really was the piece that couldn't be explained.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Cause I know, you know, a lot of people have been shattered by that. Oh, yeah. You know? But it was very good right away. But him saying all that, uh I he sent me a message one day when I was checking on them. And uh Phoenicia hadn't hadn't transitioned yet, but you know, she was on her way. And Tim said um the Lord told him everything was gonna move fast. You remember telling me that?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, I I remember the conversation, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. So do you think, in retrospect, I'm thinking now that that was more about Alicia and how everything was gonna come together.
SPEAKER_00:Um when I said that, I don't believe that was. Um the reason why I say that because God is timeless. So he don't he he doesn't have to move at a certain speed. And I think he'll let the door close. He don't have to, he don't have to work on one thing to get something going. He knows the beginning from the end. So when we look at it, we look at it as like a domino effect. Well, for him, it's more puzzle pieces. And so um it's not a uh cause and reaction. Um it's it's more of a flow.
SPEAKER_05:Definitely I was saying that.
SPEAKER_00:And so, and so I do not I I don't believe um I believe every opportunity for her to be here was still there. And it would have worked out differently for her if Phoenicia would have stayed alive. But the moment she passed, then everything could go into play and need to go past that. Cause I I I just the everything I felt from God and everything I received from him during that time, um he made sure that that the transition, I understood the transition. He made sure that he was with me like through it all, because Satan was there. You know, Satan was there. So he he was talking to me too. So uh every time Satan was speaking, God was speaking too. And I I had to choose God. Um and that's the way you hear his voice, you continue to choose him. And that's what he wants. He wants us to choose him every time. And that's that's how the voice gets stronger and stronger because you continue to choose him, and it's gonna get louder in your life, and you're gonna see the fruits of it, and you'll see the harvest of it. That's good. But the enemy's gonna still be there. Everything I've been through um with Phoenicia and her passing, it seemed like I would have been strong enough just to say, Hey, how you doing to her. But the enemy was still strong, like she's not gonna like you. You're not the man for her. And he he probably told her she wasn't a top man. He probably wouldn't have told her that. So he was he was in my he was in my ear too. But God told me that she was for me. So all I had to do was speak. I had to step out on faith and speak. And so once once I got past that, it's it's always gonna be something. It's always gonna be opposite opposition. But you gotta be confident in the God you serve and confident in your place, your purpose. Like if you're confident in your purpose, ain't nothing the devil to tell you that's gonna trick you out of what God has for you.
SPEAKER_05:So that's so necessary that you say that because um when I was young, uh I remember one of my cousins got saved, right? And he was an avid uh Tupac lover. I mean, he just he loved everything that was, I mean, pretty much in opposition. I'm talking about crazed. So I asked him, uh, I always have these questions, right? So I asked him, I said, well, since you've been saved, did you forget all the Tupac lyrics? Or whatever. So in my mind, because I was little, I'm thinking it was more of a fairy tale thing, like like magic, you know what I'm saying? Like now you're in this new life and the rest of that is just gone. Like no, no desire for it. No, you just like you just forget it, like you just wash it away. And um, but I feel like it's necessary for more people to know that that the enemy, he's still the enemy. Right.
SPEAKER_00:Don't always be there, and you're gonna have to always choose God. Yeah, because he's speaking, resist him, resist, and he will flee.
SPEAKER_05:He will. He will. But I think that is uh a beautiful thing to be transparent about. Um, because it if you on the outside, you know, looking in, it seemed like the enemy wasn't saying nothing. Y'all just heard God and just and that was the only voice you heard, you know. But uh it's a it's a beautiful thing.
SPEAKER_07:He won't get messed up.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, he wanted me to mess up. He stayed on me. He was riding me and I had a word. I had a word for him.
SPEAKER_04:I like that. I know you did. I'm sorry. Uh-uh, go. When you you're saying being confident in God, the God you serve, but also being confident in his word. Because if you would have just looked at the ashes that the enemy trying to make you focus on the death and the past and the children I have in the mother, then you wouldn't have gotten to the crown of beauty, which Alicia is sitting in.
SPEAKER_00:She's the rubis improvise for you. That's good. That's good. Okay, she be preaching to Mary.
SPEAKER_05:She she's a wonder. She is. Bless the Lord.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, that's what I'm saying. That was the the main testimony I had during that time of transition was that you have to choose, you have to choose God. And so during that time, my conversations were all to God was all about um what I what I do, what I need to do. Well, I'm like, I I'm trusting in you, I'm depending on you for my next. Um and because I ran to him so much, yeah, whenever the enemy spoke, he he quickly would give. He just fed me, he fed me lines. He fed me lines. He's like in my ear. Just feed me lines. So I I never had a problem. Um, you know, I would I could hear the enemy, but it never was a thing where I I felt like I was gonna give in. And he really covered me through all of it. It it's and it's weird when you had a conversation with somebody because it's trauma. Yeah, but you didn't feel the blunt force of it.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, it's a different grace.
SPEAKER_00:It's different, it's different, man. And like to look back on it, because now you're on the outside looking in when you look back on it and to see everything, and it's like, man, that was crazy. But that I never felt like that.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:I never I never felt it.
SPEAKER_05:It reminds me of um the Hebrew boys being, you know, thrown in the fire. They say they came out, didn't even smell like that. Yeah, it didn't smell like it. It smelled like it went consumed bag, and it's definitely without witness. Yeah. Uh with with our three of y'all, it just incredible.
SPEAKER_00:He really takes the sting out of the big.
SPEAKER_04:Like if y'all watch Incredibles, how the little girl violet, she had the shield over her stables to protect you. And I I feel like that's how God removed us.
SPEAKER_00:And all of that, um, it's the responsibility is on us because it's an effort you gotta put in to put on the shield. Yeah, it's an effort to use the shield. And that's that's that's what that's what I'm talking about when you're saying choosing God because it's effort. It's not it's not like uh I choose God in the beginning of my life and then that's it.
SPEAKER_04:He knew everything else.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, it's not yeah, he don't check all the boxes. Consistent.
SPEAKER_03:Ongoing and continual basis.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
unknown:Yep, yep.
SPEAKER_05:Check his okay. ETH. ETH. For sure. That's so beautiful to me, though. Um was there, like you say, you you didn't wait on a man to to please them or to be thrown out by them. And if you had to wait definitely, somebody still would have been telling y'all it's too early to get married. You might have been 10 years later. I already know.
SPEAKER_07:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:But it we but we had people that was telling us we we didn't we weren't together long, and it was more people. You didn't I didn't realize it was so many people around me that got married quick.
SPEAKER_06:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:And like you just didn't know the stories. And they was quick to tell us, hey, me and my husband met such and such. We was only together three, four, five months. Wow. Then we got married and we've been together 20, 30, 40 years. And so so the stories come out, the people want like soon as soon as we said we was getting married, then that's when you start getting all the stories and everything, and that was encouraging as well. Um, but like we were strong. We were strong in what we believed. Yeah, I made sure she was right.
SPEAKER_03:Like, yeah, that's that's like God had already told me, like I said, my previous marriage was unhealthy, but God had already said that he was gonna redeem the time. Yeah, yeah. You know, he redeemed the time.
SPEAKER_07:That's right.
SPEAKER_05:That's so beautiful, though. But it made sense when uh, you know, again on the outside looking in. And it not that it has to make sense to me, but it did. And it was beautiful, and I felt um happy for him, you know. I was like, yeah, she uh she a good one. Because you know, people people be concerned about their sisters and stuff, but you might be concerned about your brothers too. Yeah, I tell people all the time I love my sister and love. She's amazing, she's incredible. And I felt I told my brother, you the Lord gave you favor for sure. And I don't have to worry about him, I don't have to worry about my nieces and you know, my niece and nephews, none of that. So, you know, it it's important to me. But uh, I felt like it made sense for sure. It definitely makes sense. I feel like it made a lot of sense because I knew them, like he said, they they was together for for a while. I knew him for a long time. Uh I probably was about what 11, 10, 11. Um, because because of you know the winter side. Yeah. So I knew Sweet Pete and his family, and uh, and I knew Phoenicia because I worked with her. Okay.
SPEAKER_00:I was over that way the other day.
SPEAKER_05:11. You laughing at the store.
SPEAKER_00:That's what my mind was when I saw the business. Like, I remember sitting in that park a lot that night.
SPEAKER_05:And you was talking about you want me to tell the story? Did he take the store? Oh, probably did. I don't know. Uh Venisha and I used to work together, right? And um on the weekends, I would get out early. So uh, and that probably I had been working down probably about three or four years then. But on the weekends, I had started getting down early at Kato.
SPEAKER_03:Kato's, okay.
SPEAKER_05:And uh Nisha used to be mad. Come to find out, she used to be mad that I was getting out early on the weekend to eliminate her be there.
SPEAKER_00:When she got out of work, she'd come to me for 20 minutes. And so she was like, she got you, and like this before we gotta say, so she was like, she talking about she going to church, and then you're gonna be like, Yeah, we don't want to church in the house and we join the right way. She went to the policy. I was coming with the sheet.
SPEAKER_05:That drum was so funny. I was like, what she was so sweet. Very sweet. I used to be going to church. We used to be singing, and we would have something to do like every weekend. But you know, he he was a uh gospel DJ, so he he know how it was back then. We was always somewhere to sing. But um, that journal was so funny that she told me that. She said, I gotta repent too. I was like, what? I was just gonna see it because I hadn't seen her in years, at least about 10 years.
SPEAKER_03:Oh wow. That joint was so funny, man.
SPEAKER_05:You said when you seen me up there with the praise. You had to ask me to forgive. I was like, girl, what? Sure. I never knew about you. Right. You mad, man. She was like, I think it's just so uh what you told me, that was just so admirable for you to be um uh dogmatic about being now, so you can go to church. That job was so funny. But she was she was uh she was a beautiful person now. She she really was she really was, and and uh and then like I said too, we all on the outside looking in, right? And we know this or whatever. I feel like you give Tim a space to talk about her, to even still show love towards her to miss her, I believe. And uh it just so it looks so effortless to me. So effortless. I mean, what does that look like? How do you how do you do that?
SPEAKER_03:Well So of course, she was his wife before she transitioned. You know, this wasn't no they were together and they broke up. That was his wife. They loved each other, you know what I mean? So losing her and then how quickly we got together, I know that there's still gonna be some time where he has to talk. And if I don't, if me as his wife, if I don't give him that space or that where he can be vulnerable, then like where else is he gonna get that in? So I you know, we're vulnerable towards each other because you know, I have trauma too. His trauma is losing his spouse, and you know, I have trauma just from an unhealthy marriage. So I can be vulnerable with him about my trauma, he can be vulnerable with me about you know his trauma. So, and that's what makes it so easy. Like we've had that conversation though, just how easy it is for us to have that conversation about her, or if he's feeling some kind of way for me to just be there for him and listen to him, whatever you know the case may be. Um, and I I just say it's all God, you know? It definitely is all God for sure.
SPEAKER_05:It definitely is. I mean, and I'm saying it is because that's what it looks like. Yeah, you know.
SPEAKER_00:But I wanted to make sure too, um, something that I did when we got married. I I came to her because I wanted her to know I'ma always be honest about how I feel. And then you you got me. But if you ever see something on me, you gotta let me know. You gotta hold me accountable. I didn't want that to be uh um something in our marriage, un untouchable place in our marriage that um she couldn't say anything about. So I I made sure. Sure, that I told her, like, uh it's it's in her situation, she got a divorce. It's it's more physical. She has somebody that's physically somewhere else, and I can see him when he's approaching. It's not that way with with me and my my first wife. So she can live in my heart and I can be festering something that no one can see. So it's dangerous. And so she that place belongs to her now. Yes. That place belongs to her now.
SPEAKER_05:What you gonna do with your man of God?
SPEAKER_00:So I had to tell her, yeah. Like that place belongs to you. So it's nothing wrong with me um reminiscing on the times we had and even having moments where, you know, during that tragedy, that I may go back to that and you know be down or something. But if you see something on me, if you see it on me, you you gotta let me know. You you gotta don't let it be something that you feel like you can't talk about, or you you don't wanna say, you don't want to accuse me. No, that place belongs to you. Yeah, that belongs that it belongs to you. So I wanted to make sure that that wasn't a secret. I need to put that out in the atmosphere, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:And so that's so good.
SPEAKER_05:Because I'm telling you, I probably unless I'm listening to Holy Spirit, which I I believe he would talk to me about that for sure. But I feel like I'd be like, but that means you ain't here, you still doing all that. Yeah, yeah. But you know, that's why it's so important to to hear Holy Spirit, to have Holy Spirit and to remember what he says.
SPEAKER_00:And and you gotta stand on your word that you're you gotta stand on your testimony with. Um if God healed you, and I believe we have moments. You can't I shouldn't spread, as a believer, I shouldn't spread that out into a lifestyle or months. And so I do have moments where the enemy is gonna attack. I'm saying the enemy's gonna be the enemy. So I have moments where he catch me off guard, or sometime when I'm getting ready to speak to somebody, he'll hit me with something. Um he'll hit me with something, but it should never create uh a wall between her.
SPEAKER_06:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:So first thing I gotta do is let her know.
SPEAKER_06:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:I let her know whether it whether it affects me in a way where I got emotional, or if it was just something that wasn't that big, yeah, I let her know. Um because I don't I I do not want to create a wall between the marriage I got with the marriage that I had. And so um that's where I stand on it.
SPEAKER_05:Y'all sound like best friends with real. Yeah, we really are. Yeah, that's what it sounds like.
SPEAKER_00:I really like to not know her. Um, and I and I crack a joke like that. I crack a joke like, man, I just met you. Real for the amount of time we we've been together. We should be real in sync for how the show is just outside looking in.
SPEAKER_05:I just disagree.
SPEAKER_04:Did you have a jokester on your list?
SPEAKER_03:Uh a comedian. I did it. I think I said sense of humor though. I think I did say that. It's dead.
SPEAKER_07:It's there.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, yeah. So are there times that you you come in, like if he's having a moment, or you can tell something is bothering him that you just come in and cover and pray for him, or well, typically I don't have to guess.
SPEAKER_03:Like he's gonna talk to me about it, and whatever it is, you know, he'll talk about it. I embrace him and let him have his moment. He's beautiful. And you know, we move past it's nothing that's sitting there. I don't feel any kind of way. I just feel like I should be loving on my husband in this moment. So that's God.
SPEAKER_05:That is beautiful, isn't it? Come on, we'd at least tell the people what to do.
SPEAKER_03:That is beautiful, and it's it's so it's it's just it it just makes me want to embrace him. Make me want to just, you know, love on him. Um I'm not sitting up there saying it's gonna be alright. No, he he knows it's gonna be alright. It's just really my place to just embrace him and let him get that out. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:So in actuality though, a divorce is a loss as well. Absolutely.
SPEAKER_00:And it and it is, and I'm down for her the same way.
SPEAKER_07:Yeah, definitely.
SPEAKER_00:It's conversations we have, and we have to work through stuff that you know that may be lingering, but oh trauma. Oh trauma. But a lot of people don't see divorce, they don't put it in the same boat as what I went through. And it's it's a loss is a loss. A loss is a loss, and and you have to take your time and heal from that too. So and it's important that you heal. Important that we all heal.
SPEAKER_05:So I just keep hearing my I'm gonna go back to this. I heard both of y'all say um y'all received, and really that's when it happened. Yeah. Even during, you know, your process of what you said, like a year or two. But when you finally received me, you was like, Yeah, I'm a wife. And then it was like, bow. Yeah. So y'all sound, you know, pretty similar in that. You knowing that you're a wife, and you knowing that you're a husband. And my sister right here, she always says she's a wife. And that's that's how I see her. She carries herself like that. I told her she walked so elegantly. She is scary. I tell I seen you in the dark, girl, because I knew that was your walk. I can even see like that. She drank like Tim. No, for real. That message is right there, because I can see that walk. But uh, I think it's amazing. He just takes me back for real, too, to uh what my uncle told me one time. I said, um, you just gonna talk to your niece like that. He said, um, he asked me, did I mind the husband? I said, yes, sir, of course. He said, well, you must not be for real yet, because God answered your prayer.
SPEAKER_03:Oh man, I bet you that's what's me. You walk right on the other classroom. I said, that's how you're gonna talk. My goodness.
SPEAKER_05:I said you're gonna talk to your knees. You waddling. Who told you to be a mirror? This early in the morning. Have I had coffee yet? What's going on? So I'm I'm ever learning though. I'm learning from all of y'all, our three of y'all.
SPEAKER_03:We can all learn from each other, though.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, yeah, absolutely. I said uh I said Timmy be taking pictures and caring on that, be smiling in the in the background.
SPEAKER_00:Do at least just trying to get my rewards point.
SPEAKER_04:Mind is with time you look up in the sound booth, I'll be like, oh Tim, I hear today.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, we gotta talk about this time. That man was ghost. He was gone for for about two months, wasn't it? That's that's rocky. Be with your wife, baby. Straight up. I said Tim ain't nothing. I'm looking for somebody to do like this too. Tim ain't up there. Ain't even looking.
SPEAKER_04:Tim said, time out.
SPEAKER_05:Time out, ain't that beautiful? I ain't mad either. That's how it's supposed to be. But I think that's a beautiful testament for your boys and and for your boys.
SPEAKER_00:And that's why I say God, God thought of it all. He was going way past what I could think. Um, in the fact that during our healing process, I'm I'm dealing with losing my wife. My kids are losing, they lost their mother. I have no experience with that. He brought her in, she lost her dad at 12 years old. So she has insight, and so sh she can see something that I can't see. And so that that's another aspect to it that he was thinking a lot further than what I was thinking. And if I was saying if I was just putting it all on me, and just like I want what I want, and I want to do it in my time, and it's too soon, and you you never know what you're getting in the way of. We all want happiness, but then we'll turn around and get in the way of it.
SPEAKER_05:Man, okay, eash. That is beautiful and Tim Tim babies, at least with y'all babies, they don't seem like they attach to people that quickly.
SPEAKER_00:No, not not like that. Yeah. And for them to jump straight in, and it was it was amazing.
SPEAKER_06:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Like the things I saw. Because I watched them grow up and I I know how close they were to their mom. And to see like them attached themselves to her so quickly. Yeah, like I say, it was a lot of stuff that I had in place that I that I made sure I did it soberly. In my sober mind, I put I made a checklist of what I wanted to see outside of love. And um as those boxes were getting checked, I'm so both of y'all had lists. Yeah, nothing holding. I had to make a list. Okay.
SPEAKER_05:And look, now I know I'm at least giving five inches on me. Well, at least five.
SPEAKER_04:You don't want to hurt your neck.
SPEAKER_05:That is beautiful, though. That is so beautiful. Uh, like you say, it makes me think about the scripture exceedingly abundant. Yeah. Above all, we can ask God through.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, yeah, for sure.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, that is incredible.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, even in the um Isaiah 61. So, like y'all talked about the one through three, it's a beautiful ashes. But when you go further down into the fours and on down, it's talking about rebuilding. Yeah, you know, now we're able to see how y'all are rebuilding.
SPEAKER_05:My Lord He's beautiful.
SPEAKER_03:God is amazing. He is so amazing.
SPEAKER_00:And God is not, He's not wasteful. No, he's not in His plan that there is no waste. So Phoenicia gets heaven, we get heaven on earth. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Come on.
SPEAKER_00:And only He can rightly divide that. Yeah. We can't do that. I could I couldn't I couldn't schedule a time for her death that would be convenient to me and my family. Only only God can do that. And so that's part of accepting and resting in his promise.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Lord have mercy.
SPEAKER_03:And he's so strategic. He knows that. Ridiculous. Yes.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. So did your boys, but you say they they was they was accepting of it right away too, right? Instantly.
SPEAKER_03:Like it was a shock, but it at the same time, they were like, you know, like I said, they knew me.
SPEAKER_00:I was expecting resistance. I was expecting some type of resistance. I didn't went down her Facebook page trying to see what what I'm up with. That gonna be a problem.
SPEAKER_05:Because they definitely look protected with you. Yeah, they do.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, um, they do, they do, and and they are, but nobody her her mom, nobody, her brothers, nobody. And I was like, why y'all ain't bugging again? Come on, I'm waiting for it. Yeah, he said he was ready for it, but nobody did anything.
SPEAKER_05:I was like, Yeah, it was it was I mean, like I said, on the outside looking there, it looked like it makes so much sense, you know. Yeah, and you really can't buck against that. No, it's hard to bug against that, yeah. Let's just crazy. Yeah, buck against that, seriously. She's just out your mind. Yeah, yeah. I definitely feel like y'all's story will be breaking chains for a lot of people, you know. And and laying out what they should do. And you they'll even see what they what they need to let go. Yeah, and what they need to, you know, accept. Like, I think that's so important that you said um you know, Satan was still talking too. But you have to, like you say, you magnify the voice of the Lord with the scripture and see what he said about you and your life. Man, yes. I just think that it was just it was just incredible, like for lack of a better word. Just incredible, and it got more delicious. The first round it was fascinating, and it just got more. I was like, good God. But that's what we're supposed to see. That's what we're supposed to be witnessing as believers. And then um non-believers are supposed to see that, yeah, supposed to want that God, you know what I'm saying? Supposed to want our God by looking at our lives, and that's what the scriptures say, he's gonna get the glory for it. Yes, but I think um people spend a lot of time too being attached to heartbrokenness. Because as sad as it be, it still be familiar. And to them it makes more sense. Like I've heard people saying they feel guilty for being happy when they feel like they should be still sad and down, downtrodden and everything. Yeah, and they didn't got enough relationship with sadness.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and and people promote that, man. They promote sadness, and especially when you go through what we went through. Oh, I know, I know you doing bad. I know you hurting and no man. Anyway, you shouldn't even talk. Yeah, we can't bless crazy.
SPEAKER_07:Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Like, no, I ain't receiving that. I don't feel it, so I'm not gonna show me hard yet. I ain't felt it yet. Yeah, I know what it, I know what happened. I was there, but I hadn't felt it yet, and so I'm not gonna receive it.
SPEAKER_03:We don't look like what we've been through.
SPEAKER_00:Absolutely.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, yeah, like a little teeny babble of happy with the joy of the Lord, yeah, the joy of the Lord. Absolutely the Lord, absolutely, and it's a beautiful thing.
SPEAKER_04:That's why I say y'all are the blueprint, yeah. Y'all know it or not. Yeah, we don't have to be hard. We ain't gotta wait forever. Yeah, so yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, that's true. And I think, like you said, you don't have to wait forever. People have put in their mind that they gotta wait for them to roll with that mindset. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Well, that's what I'm saying. Like, so the enemy is gonna promote that you die with them. And I'm when I'm saying die with them, you're gonna live in that moment that you had. And you cannot do anything with that. It's nothing, it's it's no fruit in that. Um I remember I can't remember how it was right after, but um a lot of stuff was just playing through my head. And um I remember I I I think I did a what if or something like that, and and Holy Spirit quickly told me like um if I'm trying to remember how it was worded. It's like if you if you look at what if, you hinder what is and what is to come. And it's like if you live in the past, you're gonna hinder your present and your future. And you can't live in the past. It's not healthy, it's not a healthy thing. And one of the scriptures that God gave me, um, when he when he showed me her the in those four days, um, he took me to um when Moses died. And when Moses, they Moses, Moses did everything he did, took him through the Red Sea and all that, and then when when he died, they mourned for 30 days and was out of there. And then moved on. And 30 days, Lord Jesus. One light bill.
SPEAKER_07:One light bill. One light bill.
SPEAKER_00:One mortgage. And so that's that's put you in the mindset of God that He He's not gonna waste. He's not wasteful. So when you sit in that, that's what you're doing. Yeah, you're wasting time. You're wasting time and you you wasting the promises he has for you, you're wasting the provision he's laid out for you, you you wasting all those things trying to go somewhere that you don't belong. If both of you were meant to die, you both would have died. Yeah, and because of that, you gotta love, you gotta live on.
SPEAKER_05:You know what that reminds me of too, um, Jesus um on the cross. And he tell his mama, there's your son now. Yeah, yeah. His son, behold your mother. And what if she had resisted that, you know what I'm saying? Yeah. And it would have been in the in the human mind, in the fallen state, it would have been easy to be like, that ain't my son. Right. What you talking about, you know what I'm saying? But he was still even then making provisions, meticulous. Yeah, that man says, woman, that's your son.
SPEAKER_00:Son, that's your mama. He will he will land something out, yeah. Yeah, right, and we can be redeemed.
SPEAKER_05:That's insane. But I love it. I love it, and that lets us know we can trust God with every part of us. We trust God, yes. With every part of us, with everything. When uh when I realized that, I started telling God how kind of crazy. And I be like, look now, you know, I ain't trying to be weird and then you but you know your child quirking now. I be like, this right here, what we gonna do with it.
SPEAKER_00:But that's what he wants us to do. He can handle it, he's not gonna look at us crazy. He knows exactly what to do. Yeah, and he and he wants you open with him instead of hiding it from him. Yeah, like he doesn't know. Like he ain't see it anyway.
SPEAKER_04:I just be like, I'll see somebody do something. Oh god, I don't want that. Yeah, yeah. That's that look at that. That's right.
SPEAKER_05:You know your dungeon ain't got no patience for that right there. It's bitter.
SPEAKER_03:No parts of that.
SPEAKER_05:I want some lemonade sweet cook. Heavenly sweet. Right. I don't want that bitter cooked. That's right. Well, that's gonna be so crazy that I was like, I feel so free telling you this stuff now. Yeah, yeah. But I I think that's uh such a beautiful testimony, a beautiful testament. Uh, do you have any encouraging words? For somebody who has dealt with uh trauma in past relationships and and getting over that and learning to trust God in it.
SPEAKER_03:Uh well that's what I was gonna say. You definitely have to heal. And like he said, you can't sit in that stuff because if you sit in it, then you're gonna it's gonna spew over into the next. Like it's never gonna get any better. Like it's just you have to get somewhere, get in your word, apply it, and go from there and just keep going listen, listening to God, listening for God and listening to God. Um don't let your wounds determine who you are because they can, you know, hurt people, hurt people. So you cannot allow your wounds to um go into your next relationship, friendship, whatever it may be, you know. You have to heal from that stuff and and know that that's not you. That's that's not who you are, that's not who God intended you to be.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, so I received it.
SPEAKER_03:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:I'm thinking. And I'm gonna plan, I'm thinking about other things.
SPEAKER_03:Yes, you are not your womb.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. Sound like a book. Oh my goodness. Yeah, what is up with this book stuff? Sound like a book.
SPEAKER_03:Who you gonna write the book?
SPEAKER_05:You you amen. Praise God.
SPEAKER_04:You'd have heard it before, ain't it?
SPEAKER_05:Write it.
SPEAKER_04:Oh, it's confirmation. I've heard it so many times.
SPEAKER_05:Sound like a book, get to work, get to work then.
SPEAKER_03:I'm like, I don't know why I keep hearing this write a book thing. Dude, what is this?
SPEAKER_05:Praise God, it's necessary. I'm telling you, it's next C Show. Write you something, write you something tonight, baby. What is it? The uh the the pre pre-word, what is it in the beginning of the book?
SPEAKER_03:Pre-word, yeah, pre-word, gone good. Introduction. Write you the context act. My goodness. All right, yeah, I've heard that I know at least five or six times. But and it's so funny. I know this is a little off topic, but again, that water and Holy Spirit, I heard write a book. And this was uh this was before him, actually. And I ignored it because I'm just like, and then I met this stranger girl, not stranger girl, somebody need to know. Somebody say she's a sweet lady. Yeah, I didn't know her ahead of the time, and she wrote a book, and she started telling me that I needed to write a book. She was telling me her story, and she started saying that I needed to write a book, and I'm just like, You got two books in you already.
SPEAKER_04:Two of them. You said that you heard that and now you got the reveal. Yeah, it's already in there.
SPEAKER_05:Shut the list.
SPEAKER_04:All right, she better write way too.
SPEAKER_05:Show do because I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. Do it. Look, man. Act like it's it's about your booze. Okay, little we're gonna do it. Get to work. Cause she's gonna make it happen. Oh, yeah. God, I'm gonna get that. I'm gonna text you tomorrow. What you wrote yesterday, because what you read last night?
SPEAKER_03:Oh, the building party. For real.
SPEAKER_05:What you robbed, okay. Yep. I'ma do like this in the air. I'ma be like dude, you got two. Like I heard two, too. Oh my goodness. Do it.
SPEAKER_03:Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_05:The Lord showed you how many pages.
SPEAKER_03:No, I I just gotta be in that place where I I say I receive it, Lord. Because I haven't received it yet, but I need to because I've heard this so many times. Y'all ain't never wrote no book. It don't matter.
SPEAKER_04:It don't matter. You wrote a report in school. That's a book. That was because I had to. But now you gotta do it too.
SPEAKER_05:If it's a mandate, do it. Do it before the Lord. Yeah. And it'll be him right with you.
unknown:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:All right, Moses. I ain't never said nothing to no people before. Do it.
SPEAKER_03:My goodness.
SPEAKER_05:Do it.
SPEAKER_04:They prophesied too. Come on now.
SPEAKER_05:Confirmation. We read it. We ready. But um, I just want to thank y'all personally, you know, for coming out and being transparent and not gatekeeping the goodness of God, you know?
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, yeah. We want everybody to know the goodness of God.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. And you can see it, uh, it's just so evident. They I say they look so cute looking down. So bright and so happy. I've seen Tim and all this time I've been Facebook friends, and I ain't never seen as many pictures of Tim. When he changed that profile pitch, I knew. I knew. And then uh, yeah, I said, look at Sweet P on that Timazon. You look like you got Christian man.
SPEAKER_03:That was so funny.
SPEAKER_05:Tim gets out with that. I'm ready. I heard Tim and Kim. Okay. That is so um, so beautiful, though. So sweet. So sweet. That is beautiful, and that's how it's supposed to be. And as a believer, it's just supposed to work out for us. And people are supposed to see it. It's supposed to look impossible. But it's supposed to work out. But um, anything else y'all want to say? You want to encourage people? Aerie? Timmy.
SPEAKER_00:I think it all everything been said. Um, if I had to leave with with one thing is uh anybody with dealing with trauma or loss, um when you transition into that new place, don't think that uncomfortable is a sign that you're not in in the right position. Um don't think that opposition means you're not in the right position. All that comes along with the journey. It's impossible to go through trauma, it's impossible to go through loss and stay the same. But the shaping of God is going to create us, it's gonna take us to a new level. So it it will be change, but it's not for the bad.
SPEAKER_05:For the better.
SPEAKER_00:It's for the better. So when you feel uncomfortable in your journey, if you feel opposition in your journey, that's not that's not a bad thing. That's that's you changing. You're not the same anymore. And that's all right. That's all right.
SPEAKER_05:Somebody receiving that. Yeah. Because you sound so uh so father like. In a you know, in a gentle, you know, uh imparting type way. Somebody done received that.
SPEAKER_00:I I had to learn that that I was a different person. I'm a different person, I'm not the same person. And uh a part of me died that day, and but it's not for the bad, it's for the good, for the better. And so um when you feel uncomfortable making the the combin the conversation or the connection or opposition and from the enemy, like that. I don't need to do this. If I okay, I'm already saved, that's what this is what I supposed to be doing. They're supposed to just raise my kids. I'm still not experiencing the abundance of the fullness of God. So in that it's gonna be you're gonna be uncomfortable. You're gonna have opposition, but we're we overcome because great is he. That's enough than he that's in the world.
SPEAKER_05:So good. So good. Well, I hope you guys have enjoyed this episode today, tonight, whatever time you're listening. And I hope that you have received a word for yourself. And it does not even um necessarily have to be about marriage, but whatever you feel like you lost, or whatever you feel like you're dealing with, that you may feel like there's opposition. But you you just you don't have to live in, like he said, you don't have to live, and she said, in sadness, you're gonna have to live in heartbrokenness, you don't have to live in fear, or even just living in the words of Satan. Resist that boy. There we are. And do what you gotta do. Like my my good sister, she's gonna write that book. Both um, it's gonna come quick and easy too.
SPEAKER_03:I receive that. It's gonna come easy, so I receive that.
SPEAKER_05:Quick and easy, like it has been for us. Yeah, absolutely. I heard the Lord say in the land of the living. Don't be attached to the dead things. That's good. On to the land of the living.
SPEAKER_07:That's good.
SPEAKER_05:But we'll see you next time, guys.
SPEAKER_01:First I'm gonna hit my days. Then I'm telling it, and the second day, only to fix my face, ma'am.
SPEAKER_02:First I'm gonna hit my days, then I'm telling it, and that's gotta glorify the most high if you really miss it. No need to drive it on the end. We've been the truth in this walk with the footprints in the stand of way more mighty than yours. No shame to hold it on to his shoulders. When life gets heavy as bottles, the vessel would be made available. Let's read total. All glory to God while we go on this journey. Put all into your speech. We decree that you have made us worth it. We still listen, so Lord, talk to me, and protect me from the ones who throwin' stout to me. I'm never afraid of people finding little faults in me. Cause I'm tight with the redeemer. Just take this walk with me. Or come talk with me. I'm here to share this light and do my best to be reflection of him at all times. And even when I fall off his honesty in my eyes, I'm not a perfect person. I'm the first to admit it, but he paid my tuition. So I just had a long week.
SPEAKER_01:Know a couple way to fix my boys. First I'm gonna hit my knees, then I'm doing this. I just had a long week.
unknown:First I'm gonna hit my knees, then I'm doing this.