spk_0:   0:00
well, Teoh family podcast where we believe you all fallible and what you do matters Thistles. Episode number 56 I am Justin would and I'm shot a wood.

spk_1:   0:29
How are you, honey? I'm awesome. Good. Thank you, everyone to listening for four listening. Burke will be along. So I I'm not stuffing. I'm not editing.

spk_0:   0:43
It's been great to get feedback from people. We appreciate it. We hope that you continue to get value out of the topics that we bring

spk_1:   0:50
Teoh. Yes, very much

spk_0:   0:51
So. Today's topic

spk_1:   0:53
is we're talking about taking a day of rest. Yes, and it is so important.

spk_0:   0:58
And it is so hard. It's so I just start out saying that we have struggled with this our entire marriage.

spk_1:   1:05
Oh, yeah, for sure. And like yesterday I took a day off of like, resting. And you did not. You had a full day. Oh, my goodness. Right. You re organized. The girls have then is very low anyway

spk_0:   1:19
And they take a day off.

spk_1:   1:21
And I didn't and our kids were so confused. Way do not like to do that

spk_0:   1:26
on. Start out with another story.

spk_1:   1:27
Okay, Another story. Better story. My grandfather Pupo He was my dad's dad. He was a farmer, small farm, very small farm. By today's standards, he would always take Sunday off, even if even if, like, like his crop, Capasa be ruined. He would like Narain the next day, like his crop was out in the field like tobacco. Usually and couldn't you got money? It would really hurt his price. And it's like you work on that all year long, and there was times where he would just he would still take Sunday off. Wow, it was just It was just crazy, but that's what he did. He would just sit in the lawn chair underneath this big oak tree, and that's how he would spend a lot of, Ah, Sunday afternoons. He would help. He would help his wife like story. Dad would tell me he would sweep. You would sweep and dust mop on Sunday mornings as she got like the Sunday meal so he'd help around, you know, so they still worked like don't get me wrong like they always work. There was always something to do on the farm every day, but he would try to take. He would take Sundays off and So I always remember that. And I remember my dad. You know, my dad and we talk about that, too, that he just always took a day off, right? And so I think there's something to it.

spk_0:   2:45
I think there's a lot to it.

spk_1:   2:46
Yeah, so let's talk about this some more,

spk_0:   2:49
and it's kind of come back up for us in conversation again because we've been watching a Siri's, I guess I don't know how to say it's not a movie. It's like a TV series, but not on TV. Um called the chosen. And it shows, you know, the life of Jewish people. You know, 2000 years ago, right?

spk_1:   3:11
And they took Shabazz, which was Friday night and Saturday, off

spk_0:   3:17
right, several scenes where they talk about the struggle with, like, Why are we doing? They saying, You know, we're doing this because God created the Earth in six days, and then he took a rest, and this is the time for us to connect to the family for us to honor God for us on our people.

spk_1:   3:35
You know, it's interesting the during the French Revolution. That's definitely not in our show. Notes on average Revolution they tried to switch and they may just as seven days in the week, 10 days, because it was 10 and more, you know, the whole decimal system and everything, more efficient numbers and, like horses and everything just died because they just never worked. And they just couldn't handle going those two extra day. So, you know, maybe that's what they're used to. Um, So I think throughout history, people have taken a day off. Now in our culture, now we get two days off, usually,

spk_0:   4:12
yeah, but it's so

spk_1:   4:13
that's the thing. Are you really resting and taking today? So we're talking about a rest day, right? And so what is the problem with taking a rest day? What is going on upstairs?

spk_0:   4:22
I don't even hear, kid. This is our kids. So it's so hard cause even, you know, like we used the term during the business week, which is money through Friday, right? But the reality is, in a modern America, most businesses operate. A lot of businesses operate seven days a week,

spk_1:   4:41
right? And if you operate your own business, that's you don't really get time off. There's never downtime. Well, there should be downtime But

spk_0:   4:50
But a lot of times the weight practically works out there is not,

spk_1:   4:53
for you have Family Day or like church. Stuff like on Sunday eats up a lot of your day where it's not really rest like it's not rest ful. So it's a very hard thing.

spk_0:   5:05
It is a hard thing, I think, is why we've continued to wrestle with it. We have

spk_1:   5:09
tried to take off so many different days. I would say every day of the week. We have tried as a rest day,

spk_0:   5:14
maybe season,

spk_1:   5:16
Yeah, some seasons of our life. We're a business and we try to do this. But anyway, we're back to the weekend as sort of rest, right? I don't work on Sundays. That's only Dad don't work,

spk_0:   5:28
right? So I've been trying to do paid work Monday through Friday, right? Do projects around the house on Saturdays, right? And then trying to rest on Sundays,

spk_1:   5:40
right? So I think there are different seasons. There's different times, but I think the thing is you have to find rest because why why would you say

spk_0:   5:53
what is

spk_1:   5:53
in the show? Notes? Because I don't

spk_0:   5:54
know, You know, I mean outside, like that we see that is biblical instruction. I think for my own personal experience, the times that I have totally ignored that and never You know, there were seasons in my life, especially when I was a young adult that I would work like three different jobs. So there was never a day off from work, and then I would reach a point that my body would fail in some way, right? I would have, like, a major health, something come up which would force me to rest, right? And that's what my mom, I can still hear her, like in my head a lot, because she will say, If you don't choose to take some rest, your body will choose for you,

spk_1:   6:35
right? Right.

spk_0:   6:36
And I just think there's limits on our human Selves and so we can try to defy that. Be, like all in all my working machine. I could do all this kind of stuff, but at some point we're gonna hit a wall,

spk_1:   6:48
right? Right, right.

spk_0:   6:49
And the recovery from crashing into that wall is a whole lot worse than taking a day breast.

spk_1:   6:54
Wrist, right, right, right. So some suggestions for days arrest sometimes We just have to totally change gears. Yeah, like we just say we have to leave here because we have business stuff. It always has to be dealt with or just the homesteading part needs attention. Always. So sometimes we'll go to the park will just go do something for you.

spk_0:   7:15
Yeah, and I think that's really important for people who which right now it's an unusual time in history because most people are working from home, but for us, that's kind of our normal is working from home. But that means it's even harder to take a break from rest or take a break from work. Because if you look in a room where you look at the corner, there's always like you're like, Oh, I can really get something else done on that project

spk_1:   7:40
right? And part of the problem is, when you're like,

spk_0:   7:43
Oh, I've got

spk_1:   7:44
a day off, let's fill it with all the family stuff we didn't get to do this whole week

spk_0:   7:48
right, which

spk_1:   7:49
is always, like, exhausting for May and part. I've just been so personality. If you're all extroverts and you could just like you get Mawr rest and energized, just dealing with people coping, tolerating evil. Right? Right. That's an interpreter talking right there. Yeah, you know. So for May, that is not rest ful,

spk_0:   8:07
but even like when we were in the season where I was full time Stay at home, Mom. Right, then. Even in that season, it was hard for me, you know, because I was still, especially when everybody was really small. We have dealing with diapers and all of that kind of stuff, like you can't just hit the pause button and break from having a toddler right or something like that.

spk_1:   8:28
Or when we had a milk cow, I was milking the cow. Yeah. You didn't get a day off. In fact, I used it like magic. Oh, no, I can't. I gotta milk.

spk_0:   8:38
Yeah, that was your introvert excuse to talk to

spk_1:   8:43
the gal. It was just beautiful time. So what else we got there?

spk_0:   8:48
Well, I think even one of the business coaches that we listen to Dan Sullivan, the strategic coach he was even talking about. If you reached a place of, like, a lack of creativity and you notice a decrease in productivity in a business, it's probably a sign you just need to take some time off, right? Because when you do, not only your body gets restored, but your mind and your spirit there's just like a total reset so that when you come back, you're actually a lot mawr productive. I think that's the trap, because it's actually you get more done when you stop and rest. Right? But it is so counterintuitive. Yeah, it's hard for us to do it.

spk_1:   9:28
Well, it's so our culture just says if you're busy, you're better. You're a better person if you stay busy, right? As opposed to resting. Um, there are so many people throughout, like davinci. I came or exact same quote he had. Basically, his point was taking time off and away from things actually makes you able to see things so much clear. Um, yeah, I came around the quote, but something like that

spk_0:   9:53
right now I guess I should have read it down. I know, I know. I tell him

spk_1:   9:58
on Chinese. My Chinese kids I teach online Have I said that to them sometimes about when they're all, like, stressed out, like she should rest, and I camera in the DaVinci quote. But anyway, so Yeah.

spk_0:   10:09
So some practical things that we have done because it has been total failure for the last 15 16 years, however long we've been married. Yeah, well, maybe there's

spk_1:   10:17
ebbs and flows. Yeah, and part of depends on our kids and other dynamics and what they have going on. Part of turns on our commitments to other groups or church groups on Sunday. Right. Um, there's just a lot of things in factor birthday parties on Saturday. That's not a day of rest for me, right? You don't have me.

spk_0:   10:37
Yeah, for sure, sure. You

spk_1:   10:39
know, because that's the key. Are you rested? Not like this is my rest day, and I filled it with everything. But if that makes you feel rested, then do that right. But if it doesn't, you kind of have to just ask him self awareness.

spk_0:   10:51
Yeah. So some things that we have done that have helped and have shifted us into a better place. Our number one just saying, like stating that we're gonna do this in making a priority,

spk_1:   11:02
right? Right, right.

spk_0:   11:03
And then scheduling it. Yeah, because you know, like, it is really easy for both of us, particularly on Saturdays. to fill those with business things, right? And so, you know, if we're going to say all right, we're gonna follow the more Jewish calendar and timeframe and do Friday night to Saturday night or we're gonna do the more American kind of thing. And to say is going to be, you know, Sunday morning to Sunday night, Right? Um, whatever it is, blocking that on our calendar and not allowing ourselves toe plan work in that time period.

spk_1:   11:38
Right? Right. And we try to do 24 hours, right from whatever point, because we've had we have such weird schedules really compared toa right, a lot of people. So it's like, if I could just do 24 hours off. That's good. Yeah. And if I could change up the pace where I'm doing something I don't usually do that's even better, right? You know,

spk_0:   11:55
and I think that's where sometimes leaving home. But if you're working away from home all the time, then being home is that switching?

spk_1:   12:04
Right, Right, Right. Right. So yeah, And again, your kids and what they need and what they don't need that makes a big difference. Right? So

spk_0:   12:13
And I found you know, Just like the mom side of things is being the You know, everybody around here pitches in with food, but I'm still the primary food. Prepare eso even planning out. Like, Okay, we're gonna have something that I've prepped for breakfast on that day, and we're gonna have something easy, like sandwiches at lunch, and then we're gonna have something to the crock pot and supper. So I've thought through it, I've made those preparations so that when I'm in the moment, I'm not having to think, you know, what am I gonna fix? And it's been an hour.

spk_1:   12:44
Yeah, and I feel like, kind of comes back what you're saying with scheduling, Um, like, I was, as we were working today with the boys because they were kind of confused cause I was had a master working pretty hard. Today, we're doing some major gardening digging, and yeah, they were like, I was like, guys we're gonna have to just start taking. I said I don't like basically where you have a day off. Different than I have a day off, you know, because they were confused about right. And I was like, We need to just start talking about. This is our day of rest. Let's talk about together, right? Let's plan what sounds really good. Everybody. Yeah. So and then that way they get prepared for it, right? So it's not just like, Hey, it's a day of rest. Let's go. The park work, you know? And then they could have some input. And what a day of rest looks like for them.

spk_0:   13:31
Yeah, having that communication and conversation. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that's

spk_1:   13:35
part of our problem. Is that we don't I think I do think I got I think I got this from Dan Sullivan. The key to have a good rest day is you have to know when to end. You have goals that you end before the rest day. And you know what? You're gonna pick up and start doing the day after your resting. You know what I mean? So because otherwise you don't finish anything like you don't close those circles, right? Those loops, um, you have to close those things, so that makes a lot of sense. But if you If you can plan ahead before the rest day, what you're gonna tackle, it's almost like you're kind of like, your soul or your spirit can, like, start getting ahead, right? You know, without even having a work on it. Your mind, you know?

spk_0:   14:23
Yeah. So if you'll need some motivation, you can hop on. I'm sure I don't know where it is. YouTube, Netflix, Amazon, Prime something. Watch Fiddler on the roof. Watch Episode two of the Chosen. They talk about a shot there. Um and, you know, I just think there's there's such a depth to it, but it's countercultural for most of us. So you have to be super intentional if you want to make it happen. And we would love to hear about your successes because clearly we have not a state. No, but

spk_1:   14:56
we keep coming back to it. And we we do continue to say, Hey, we've got a get better at this thing.

spk_0:   15:03
Yeah, so absolutely so let us know. Let us know what your experience has been taking a rest day if you've worked out, you know? And you're like, Oh, what? When I do this, it really helps us, you know, engaged and have a better high quality family time. Whatever it ISS, we would love to hear you can connect with this on Facebook. If you just search for the lustrous family podcast, you can connect with us on instagram or on our website. Ls f podcast dot com. Most of all, though, we just want to say thank you for listening to us and hanging out. Remember, you are valuable and what you do matters have a blessed night. Thank you for day, whatever it is that's not talking.