Welcome to Vermont Ketchup with Matt. I'm Matt. Glo. I'm Glo. And I'm Adam. We're weekly rundown of everything going down in the Green Mountain State. Happy International Flirting Week. Flirting Week. What's that mean? Which part of it is giving you a speed bump here? Is it the international or is it the flirting? Week. It's the week. She uses the days. I'm used to a moment. I can do it for a whole week. No, it's just, is it comparing how different countries flirt with each other? I think that's part of it. I think this is just giving the entire world license. To flirt. To flirt. Oh, okay. I thought that was just human nature and we did it all the time. Yeah, but you know, if you're married, this is your week. Yeah, I think it's just like recognizing it is Valentine's week, so it's probably part of it, you know for the people who are not in committed relationships, you gotta give them something something to hang their hat on Yeah, they can flirt, they can flirt with anybody Yeah Person at the store, behind the counter, whatever No, I'm not doing that I was gonna say, you got like little Harvey Weinstein No, no Flirt with anyone, anytime, no problem If a broad looks good, you tell her No, but if you don't have anybody, you know You gotta find someone. Yeah. Is anyone a good flirt? No. No. Well, I don't know. Well, probably. I think I do. No. I don't know. I think I do. We've consulted the tribunal of GLOW. Y'all are in a relationship, which I'm not even sure if our listeners are always aware of that. But who flirted with who? I think we both kind of flirted mutual thing at the first time we met. Like a wink? No, I showed him my... When she licked the dessert plate? And that got him right there. That really turned him on there. No, I think it was the hairy legs. Yeah. Yeah, we were talking about hairy legs and I showed him mine. I didn't show her mine. Matt's like, huh, interesting. This is interesting. Yeah, we flirted a little bit. And we talked about the movie Borat. Which I loved. Yeah, we both loved it. Really? You didn't think it was too much at times? At times, but... Yeah, maybe at times, but I don't know. I think I laughed. Did we see it together? No. That's right. Never mind. Probably already seen that part. Yeah, yeah. I think it's really funny. I'm just surprised that you thought it was funny. I thought you might have thought it was kind of gross at times. Really? Like what parts? Like they're wrestling naked? That doesn't bother me. OK. I mean, as long as there's not blood. Fair enough. I like your old world sensibilities. How about you? Are you a good flirt? I don't think so. I don't even know how. No. When I saw this, I was trying to think how I got in the relationships I've been in. And I don't even know. I think it's like, my generation, you just kind of hang out. And all of a sudden, you're making out. All of a sudden, you're in bed, and then you're like, I guess you're my girlfriend. You know what I mean? It just kind of happens. Different generation than ours. Would you have to get on a knee and be like, would you be my best girl? I don't remember. I never got that. I never got what? No one ever like- On their knee and asking me to be their girl? No one ever? On their knee? No. Well, not knee. I mean, come on, that's a little bit old school. Okay, you're just, yeah. But no one ever said like, what would you even say? Because we used to say exclusive. Are we exclusive? But there must have been an older term for that. You want to be my- Girlfriend or boyfriend. Or item. Are we an item? Right? Isn't that an old one? Maybe from the 80s, 90s? That might be from the 30s. I don't think that was our... Probably the 40s. Probably the 40s, yeah. I don't know. I don't know. Just my girlfriend, boyfriend? I don't know. Yeah, but I don't even think it's something that we even had to verbalize. Maybe that was my problem. Maybe I'm just emotionally unavailable. but I don't even know. No. I act stupid when I'm flirting. Like what? You pretend to be stupid? No, no. Some people do, right? Well, some women think that's going to win a man over, and I wouldn't want the man that won over that. So no, I'm not. No, it's when you find someone attractive, but you're feeling really uncomfortable, but you still want to kind of like let them know that kind that's what I'm talking about. I'm trying to imagine you doing that it's really hard to imagine like are you like they were like like I don't know like what do you even well this is like 20 more years ago you know what I mean yeah I mean like we're talking I don't even think of doing that now well it depends on what the doctor looks like? Oh, the doctor. Whoa. Like, you better watch out, Matt. There's all these medical appointments. You're like, is something wrong? She's like, no, something's very right. Interesting. Yeah. Yeah, I don't. Touching your hair, that's a common one, right? No, I don't do that. I just say stupid things. No. Lifting up my top, no. Look at these, Doc. I'm a dentist. All right, we'll move on. So it is Valentine's Day and we start with glow your old stomping grounds Montpelier has been struck again by the Valentine's Day bandit. What's that? You don't remember this? No. It's been going on for years, right? Since 2002. Really? Yeah. Someone, or someones, they like... Oh, I now know, I remember. Because I was still living in that area. They cut out paper valentines and they stick it, they blitz the whole town with it. Every window's got, you know, I don't even remember, a lot. Yeah, they blitz the town. That's it. I mean, I don't know, like, it's a cute story. Yeah. Oh, nice. It's gotta be more than one person, right? And people don't know. Oh, now, everybody says, we don't know who it is. Well, now it's probably half the town. There's a million cameras. Right. Oh, yeah. In the streets these days. Don't tell me you don't know who it is. Or just, you're awake and you look outside. You're like, oh, there he is, or there they are. I think it's more than one. Has to be. It's gotta be. It's gotta be. I wonder if it's like one of those things where it's like... A cult where you start adding on members? It's not going to go that direction, but maybe. It could be a cult. Maybe it started with one person and somebody thought, Hey, I kind of like, and joined in the second year and next thing you know, word got out and people felt like, why not? I, you know, everybody wants to get in on it and do it too. I was thinking something more like it's a, uh, maybe like the, the seniors at a high school have like a tradition where like the senior class does something like that. So it's like a bunch of people who are in on it and it kind of gets passed down. That's what I was thinking. Yeah. Who knows? Someone knows. Somebody knows. But it's a cute story. Yeah. Good story. I like that. It's a mystery. Yeah. We don't want to know right? It's like, if someone came out and said it's me, we'd be like, no. I know, right? It's no longer exciting. Now it's gonna be nothing but litter. Yeah, who cleans it up? Is there a crew that walks over and cleans it all up? Well, if he or she is doing it, or them are doing it to buildings, and every I mean, like, stores with big storefronts. I don't know. Is it, do they come back and clean it off? Or does every business responsible for cleaning it off themselves? And what if it rains overnight and it just gets all stuck to buildings and you gotta like scrape it off the glass. I mean, how many years until there's a counter protest against this about like the sustainability of like using printed paper and save the trees and shit. This is already happening. Yeah. There's probably a movement underway, and it is Montpelier. There's probably a protest right now going down Main Street. There's definitely someone at Main Street in Montpelier with a petition asking you to sign to get a law passed. It was like a protest every two weeks. It was so funny. It's like a tree falling in the woods, right? If a protest happens that no one hears, does it make a sound? Exactly. Yeah, there was a protest downtown a couple of weeks ago. It was something to do with Palestine or something. It says protest on Church Street. It was like four people there. It's like, why are they even taking a picture of this? I love a protest about something happening far away that not many people know about, and that zero can actually be done about. It's like, okay, what's your goal here? I agree. I do. I mean, it's kind of... It's like, there's nothing more local that catches your eye. Like, I understand, like, you know, the Gaza situation is quote-unquote sexy, but I don't know. There's needles all over the street. Maybe we'll deal with that. Yeah. Yeah. And the Pine Street Barge Canal. A lot of people worried about that. Still get emails. All right, we'll move on. Speaking of protests and getting a lot passed, Burlington is switching over to rank choice voting, which Matt, is a thing you love. I hate it. But you hate it because in the past something happened, right? Yeah, but I just think it's a, I think, and I don't think it's gonna work anymore, it used to work in the progressive's favor. So rank choice is, do you know what that is? I've heard it many times, and I still can't figure it out. I don't 100% understand it. I think the way I understand it, Matt, correct me. When you fill out your ballot, you can put down as many names as you want in order that you want. I see. If the first person you put down, well, here's where I lose it, Matt. I think it's less than 50%. Okay. Then they go through. But won't everyone get less than 50%? Everyone should have a winner, right? No, one could get 60, the other one 30. But when they win? If that person got 60? Yeah, they win. Oh, that's a good question. See what I mean? But it's under 50. If you don't get 50%, it's still a... I think. I don't know. I'm not really sure what it is. I just don't like it. Yeah, I don't totally understand either, but the way I understood it is that it's a way to get rid of extremists. Right? Because if you're, oh, if I might, my first choice is this really extreme person, but then my second choice might be someone a little bit more moderate in my same party. And a lot of people are going to be against the extreme person, so they're going to put that person way down. Right. Okay. I can see how that works. But how often do you get, you know, I mean, yeah, maybe. Nationally? Nationally, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know if it's like the solution for what's the problem with our national situation is like we have primaries and it's only the extremists win. That's not cool. Right. Or we don't have a primary at all and we just have Biden, which is also not cool. So I don't know. Well, it's going to happen. And also non-citizens get to vote in city elections. That's good. No kidding. In Burlington. Okay. You can't do it nationally or state. No, I know, but only in Burlington. Yeah, imagine that. People who live here have a say in their local government. Yeah. I may not be a citizen, but I pay taxes. I buy stuff. My kids are in school. My kids are in school. I should have a say in what's going on. Yeah, agreed. But good luck getting that done nationally. Matt, you put on this story, this, I don't know, this, uh, This Grapes of Wrath length novel about Decker Tower, I did not read the whole thing. Okay, I didn't read the whole thing either. We get the gist. Decker Tower, do you know where that is, honey? Nope. Towers, Towers, I said that. Towers, Decker Tower. It's on St. Paul Street. Okay. As you're coming in down to the main part of the city. It's an old age home kind of thing, no? No. Oh, no? No, it's low income. There's always a bunch of people out at the bus stop that are smoking, you know, and stuff like this. As you're going in, it's on the right-hand side. Well, they've been, I guess, a lot of vagrants have taken up in the place, a lot of drug addicts and stuff. And the people who live there, they can't get rid of them. What kind of surprised me about the story is the, I guess they call it tailgating. When the vagrants are outside, and then someone walks out of the apartment to walk their dog, vagrants will rush in. And so the residents inside will be like, tailgater, tailgater, and run, and try to push them back. It's like this very medieval or zombie attack kind of vibe, you know? They have these defense systems, they're trying to push them back, but they always get overrun because some people in the tower are selling them drugs. And they're like, I want you to be inside because I need to make my money. Yeah, this started years ago, I remember. I think there was another story about this. Yeah, yeah. And they keep it up pretty well too. It doesn't look like a run down city building. City actually maintains it and keeps it okay. Well, aside from the needles and drug use. That part, yeah, that could use some help. I like that the story presents the residents as like this united front. There's even this photo of them as like they're all like raising their fists. I feel like this has like wacky 80s comedy written all over it. Yeah, it'd be a sitcom. You got like different stereotypes as like the different residents. They band together. The nerd's got to use his tech skills to help us out. We need the charmer to somehow charm the people out of here. We got a wisecracking mama, you know, like just, you know, it's just. Yeah, I'm glad I don't live there. I like the dogs. Yeah, there's three of them. No, four. Wow. This is quite the... I didn't know dogs were allowed. Okay, I will. If they allow drugs, right? Why not? Needles find dogs, no. How do you see four? I see one, two, oh, three. God, you were like the, were you good at highlights? Yeah, remember I mentioned that in a podcast many, many podcasts ago. After we record, I forget everything. I know. If you scroll down, there's a picture of a guy holding a knife in his back pocket. I would contend that's not the safest way to hold a knife. Right. I feel like someone's gonna grab that knife. Is this the, the group picture? No, if you scroll down. Oh, oh, I see. There's a guy, denim on denim, he's got a knife in his back pocket. people shouldn't have to live this way no you know not at all and what's the solution I mean okay all these drug addicts are picked up like criminals but not sent to a prison sent to a hospital like a rehab center and they are locked in until they are clean but done medically and done with super you know You know what I mean? Not just torture. And not just, yeah. I don't know. Wouldn't that be a great way to do it? Better than what they're doing. I mean, they don't even bother with them. Yeah, I think if you did that glue, if you got them locked up until they're clean, like if they go through withdrawal and all that stuff, but then there's another part of that where like, because if you're just like, okay, you're clean, bye, then it's like, well, guess where I'm going. Oh, well, that's why you definitely have to keep them for, I'd say, three months. If you can keep them clean, I think, for that long. Somebody even told me in acupuncture is that to break a habit, it takes 21 days, something like that. But then you have to get them work. Was your acupuncture talking about heroin? No, more like coffee. Which is not true, because I've been through that many times. Yeah, thinking about you coming back to coffee, and coffee just tastes good. It doesn't make you feel like you're like back in your mother's womb like heroin does. Right. Hey, that's why I like to take baths. I meant to tell you, remember the last episode we talked about taking baths? It was National Bath Day, I guess. Read in the bath day. Okay. That's why I enjoy taking hot baths, definitely. Because it feels like I'm back in a womb. And that then makes it very difficult to leave that tub. And I've done that though, where times when I've been really depressed and whatever, I just take a hot bath. Do you remember the womb? No. Oh, okay. I just wanted to make sure you weren't like, oh yeah, the womb, I knew it well. No, I'm just imagining. I remember before the womb. Yeah. Whoa. Matt, you were going to say something about mental health, we cut you off? No, I just say, yeah, that's great, keep them for three months, but you have to have them working. Oh, working, I'm sorry. You have to have them working, you have to have some sort of substance, something they have to be accountable for for certain times every day or something. They gotta do something where... No, here's even a better idea. Instead of them going somewhere to work, part of their room and board and medical treatment and everything is back like in the old days of asylums. They would use people... Indentured slavery. That's what they called it. That's how we look at it now, but why not? Because back then it worked. Matter of fact, it injured people to not have anything to do but be locked up doing nothing. That's what I'm saying. They need to be doing something, but it needs to be something like... At first, my first thought was like, oh, you can work remotely from anywhere. They could do data entry, but that is going to make you crazier, right? That's not a helpful thing. They need to do something where at the end of the day, they're like, oh, look what I accomplished. It's like a sense of purpose, you know? Other than like, hmm, heroin's awesome, right? How about, okay, another thing that's happening, like vocational schools, they no longer teach carpentry or some basic stuff like, not basic, plumbing. You know what it is now? Cosmetology. Okay, I feel like I'm talking to Ben Shapiro over here. You're right. I get it. I get it. The pusification of America. And one other, but none of it is practical. They don't teach plumbing. Places teach plumbing, though, right? Everybody needs plumbing. Oh, yeah. Unless you're, you know, I'm going to go back to where I was in Portugal years ago. Well, if they had plumbing for a couple of weeks, they'd want it. Yeah. But amazing how I adapted to not having plumbing. Well, I mean. Or electricity. When in Rome. You had to go outside and pump your water. When I was in Thailand, you had to just a hole. And you had a big ladle full of water that you poured down the back just to. Clean off your shit? Yeah. And there's no toilet paper? No. Yeah. OK. I mean, that's how it was, and still is in a lot of ways. Yeah. I knew a guy who, he liked it so much, he brought that style back to Korea. So at work, he would walk to the bathroom with a big ladle and he would do this. What are you doing? He's like, it's cleaner. It's cleaner. That's why I like bidets. Oh, I love a bidet. Me too. But you know, the thing is, it's got to be warm water. Ice cubes coming up your ass. What, are we Swedish? No, because again, Portugal has bidets. And of course, the water was so freaking cold that it was after a while, I didn't like it anymore. Seems like a punishment, like a cold bidet. Yeah, but yeah, bidet is French? Yes. But I feel like the Japanese have really mastered it. Do they have a bidet? Do they have a bidet? Does it like, it scrubs your butt and everything? I mean, what does it do? It's like, there's these settings on it. I mean, you wanna find mist? Do you want a pulsating stream? Where do you want it? You wanna move it up and down constantly? Do you wanna aim it? How do you want it? Like, what temperature do you want? Just a squirt of water. Well, you know, we all have different- Anatomy? Yes, thank you for not making me say what I was gonna say. And also, like, we all sit differently, right? So it's all like, you know, yeah, a Japanese bidet man. Sign me up. Moving on. Cannabis industry, Matt. The Cannabis Board, not this is the industry. The industry is the growers. Yeah. They say why aren't we treated like other agriculture in the state? They're not listed as a on the Landscapers are listed. People mowing a lawn are now listed as agriculture. Can you believe that? I mean, that's not agriculture. They're not growing anything. They're just cutting down lawn and polluting the air. These people are actually growing something. And they just want to work under the same laws. I agree. And I think get rid of the lawnmowers. The lawn people. I mean, get them off the list. They should not be agriculture. I agree. Let's just swap them out. Yeah, that's it. See, that's what I'm saying. Maybe you got to take one off, put one on. Yeah, you put it through, you know, doc document, you just look for that one word and you change it all throughout the entire hundred something pages. Control, find, replace. Exactly. There you go. And you're done. That's it. You go to Canibus Board, we just solve the problem for you. That one document that has it. Yeah, so they want to be able to do delivery. Again, this is a monster article, I did not read the entire thing. You're overestimating my attention span. A lot of times you don't have to read the whole thing. A lot of times you don't. But yeah, they just want to work under the same rules and be able to deliver, and things like that, and um... Direct to consumer sales. Direct to, like a farm stand or something. Yeah. Wow. I imagine they're gonna back up in traffic. Geez. Oh, yeah, that'd be cool. A weed farm stand? Yeah. So, okay, here's a question. Can I sell weed at the farmer's market? No. Not now, you can't. I mean, not yet, no. I think to sell weed, you have to be at a store. But I can sell gin at the farmer's market. Yeah, I know. Again, it's not under the same rules. Alcohol is probably... Another agency. Well, it is, but it's way worse for you than... Yes, it is. I mean, you can sell sugary drinks at the farmer's market. And that's even worse than all those. Yeah, I don't know. But I think, again, they're not playing by the same rules. I agree. So the weed industry, I guess, has done pretty well in the state since they've legalized it. They also raised the issue of you have to own land to grow cannabis. You can't just sell it. Wow. So you can't lease it? And then they raised the issue that, historically, black people own less land than white people. It's almost like it's by design. It's almost like something happened 400 years ago. Yeah, so that's interesting. Do you think anything's going to come of this? I don't know. I think the state recognizes how well they've done. You know, they're paying a lot of taxes. Who is the roadblock here? It's not the board. Is it the legislature? It would be the legislature. Is this just old people who don't smoke weed, who don't understand it? Is that just kind of... We see this cycle through that 10 more years and they'll be gone, dead, whatever. Dead, hopefully, yeah. It's legalized here. Hopefully. It's legalized here, but they're not real happy about it. Yeah. They don't understand it. I mean, that would have been your uncle. He would have totally been... Maybe I shouldn't have brought that up, but yeah. He would have been against it. It's the reefer madness era. Yeah. All right. Yeah. But... If only they knew. If only we could abduct them, force them to ingest cannabis. No, you just invite them to a big party and you put out brownies that are enhanced. Yeah, you just trick them. Yeah. Because who can resist a brownie? Then they eat a couple of brownies, think they're losing their mind. Have an heart attack. Or have a good time. I don't think that's the way to go, honey. Okay, so, speaking of, well, I don't know. I got to segue here. So Burlington is preparing for an influx of thousands of visitors. Did they say how many they're expecting? Eclipse visitors. Actually, just as of today, your brother, Matt's brother and his wife, they've been talking about coming here. But it's been a really long process because, you know, it was going to be a bunch of them, a group of friends, and some didn't want to stay here. No, well, yeah, I mean, now it's just whittled down to the two of them. Yeah, yeah. I mean, everything's booked. I mean, good luck finding anything. Oh, I know that. No, no, no. I mean, there could have been because we're pet sitting for most of it. So there's two bedrooms there. And anyway, but um, so just today, she is both. She booked it. She is coming. But it took them years. But it is only whittled down to them, too. Have you, well, it's too late now. But like, before that, I know we're not allowed to have like Airbnb's in the building. Oh, bullshit. But like one night, I'm just saying like, Yeah, I know that we talked about that. I make a G. We talked about that about, you know, another 10, 20 episodes ago. Yeah, I'm just saying make a pretty good night. Yeah, we could have made a good chunk of money. I don't care. We would also have people in our house for a night. Yeah, well, yeah, for a night. But you know, those days are over for me, where I would do so much to make a buck. And right now, I'm old enough to know it ain't worth it. We're happy to have them here. Yeah, I mean, people we know, definitely. Hey, you know, if anybody from my family ever ventures this far north, you know, They're welcome to, of course, now it's gonna only be one bedroom available. My brother was thinking about coming up with his baby's mother and her four kids or whatever. What, all those kids? In like an RV. And I never offered our place because, I don't know, I'm thinking maybe I should have, but no. If it was one night, it'd be fine, but it'd have to be one night. Like, it'd be like checkout rules, like, it's 11am. Yeah, and who's going to enforce that checkout thing? Yeah. That ends in a fist fight. Or me screaming out the window. So have you heard it takes common? I think he abandoned it because they spent a lot of money rehabilitating a very sick cat that she found on the streets and it died a couple weeks later. Aw. Yeah, I know. Sad. Had a few final good weeks. Well, my brother, Greg and Jan, they saw the last one. They traveled up to Tennessee or something. Wait, how long was the last one? I don't know. It's like a once in a lifetime thing. Only... Only then? Yeah, because there's a line that it's followed. Oh, okay. I think it was, we talked about this, I think that was 1995. May of 1995. I should probably just look it up because I knew where I was, I can remember. Where was I, May 1995? I was 14. I wasn't too into it. And you're still Martin. You don't really care. You don't see what's a big deal. I'll go outside and look at it, but I'll be like... You're not going to sit out there for two and a half hours for the whole beginning to the end. Is that what you're saying? I will not do that. Are you going to do that? No. Unless it's 80 degrees. Are you looking for a place with a good view? That place over there? Um... Where are we? Um... No, we're going to be in South Burlington! I know, right? That would have been perfect. I know. Yeah, I don't know how we're going to work that. So, the city's expecting, they say thousands, but they mean tens of thousands, right? Like, it's not going to be like 3,000 people, it's going to be like 20,000 people. People from all over the state. all over the north region, all over New England will come up here. That is a don't leave. Oh yeah, they're talking like it's July 3rd, which is always the biggest party downtown. So we're going to lose out on being right under it. I mean, South Burlington, okay, it's not too far. You still live here, you can come here. Not with all the traffic. I don't want to get stuck getting down back to South Burlington. It's too far to walk. Chavez go the back way. Yeah, everybody else probably is too. Especially over there on Spear Street at Overlook Park. Let's just hope there's good weather. Was it April or something? Yeah, there's never good weather in April. No. Alright, moving on. There's a new law in Vermont that adoptees can now access their birth records. That's just seems natural to me. I don't know, but if I was a parrot and the original deal was they can't, maybe I don't like this. I guess so. You know what I mean? Yeah, it's betraying their trust. Yeah, I mean, I don't know, I'm kind of torn. I understand that was my first thought, and then I was like, well, if you gave up the kid, and you were like, I've made the decision, I don't want any connection at all. You know, 20 years later, ring ring, you know, knock knock. That's true. Do you have a kidney? Can I have your kidney? Yeah. I'll trade you 15 years of abandonment for one kidney called Square. Yeah, I get your point. This is tough. It is tough. I don't know, like, on one hand, should it just be open always? Like, you know, there is no closed adoption. But then would that prevent people from doing it and then shitty people just raise kids or abort them? I don't know if that's better. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know what the answer is. There must be some data on it. I just don't know it. Also, if you're an adopted child and you know it, and I don't know if there's an age limit you have to be to get the records. I don't know if you can get them anytime. But let's say you're 18 and you're like, now I know who my mother and father are, do you even want to seek them out? Maybe you do, just to scratch that itch? I think it varies. Some people want to, some people don't. We know both. People who do and don't. Definitely don't. The one in Florida. Yeah. Oh, wait, she does. Never mind. Maybe. No, she doesn't. Yeah, this is a tough subject. I grew up with these two kids in high school, I went to school with. Boy and a girl, same class year, both adopted. I remember we had a party one time, they're sitting on the couch next to each other and I'm like, I think y'all might be related. Right. No. They both have kind of unique faces, like a skin tone that would suggest maybe a biracial couple. Really black, straight hair, and they're both kind of tall, even the girl. And I'm just like, me and my friend are like, do they know that? Because I don't think that they knew that each other were adopted, but me and my friend knew each of them in a way that we didn't know, and it's like, huh. Wow, when are they going to break the news to each other and then maybe look it up? I don't know, it was very weird. It was just like, if it was now, if this happened now, if I was like, whatever, 15, 16 now, I'd be like, 23 and me, let's do it. Let's just steal their hair or something, and and then just like, you gotta send it off. Solve the mystery. Yeah, let's bring closure to this, but I don't think they, I think it's one of those things where like maybe they suspected it, but never pursued it, I don't know. Wow. It's also one of those things that like, it's kind of uncomfortable to talk about. Like if someone's adopted, like I don't even know how to like, Broach that subject. Yeah. Like, I don't know. No, not weird for you? You're right, I wouldn't ask. Yeah. No. If they tell me, yeah. But even if I know, it's like, not something we bring up a lot, you know? Right. Only I'd say, if they bring it up first, and that's the way to play it. You know? Don't be the first one, because if they haven't told you themselves that they haven't spoken about it, then that's, you know, you gotta wait for your turn. So like, when he says, oh, I was talking to my dad, I shouldn't say, uh-uh-uh, adopted dad. I shouldn't do that? No, you shouldn't do that. Okay. Good to know. All right, let's move on. What's this next one? This moron. The health commissioner. The health commissioner and the, it's like some law group, the Vermont Superintendents Association are against banning cell phones in school. The health commissioner? Yeah. So, how's that involved with the education? Mental health. Oh, okay. There's been a giant increase in like anxiety, depression, thoughts of suicide, actual suicide, like once smartphones became like widely used. It's like a very clear like, oh, 2012, it jumped way up. Really? So they are saying that cell phones have definitely caused a lot of this? I guess it could be something else. Perhaps it was the second election of Barack Obama? But I think it's probably cell phones. I don't know. I mean, it's like, you know, it's correlation, right? It's not causation. But I don't know. I think anyone who has a kid or is around kids understands like, it's definitely affecting the way they think. Right. Oh, yeah. I mean, I just only discovered today that my great-niece, who's about to turn 11... What's so great about her? Ha, ha, ha. She's really into makeup. So I'm thinking, wait a minute, when I was 10 years old, what was I doing? I think I was still playing hopscotch and jumping rope, you know? You know, maybe, maybe, you know, attached to like the monkeys. I think so. Yeah. Okay. I grew up and lived in a tree outside my house in Newark. And Regattae was attached to me. I think that this generation or whatever, they're growing up with this, you know, attachments to their phones. I think, in some ways, it's probably making them better, you know, they're more open to things and, you know, they know more maybe, I don't know. Why meet their horizons, is what you're trying to say? You know, they're reading the news or they're, no, they're looking at pictures, it's so stupid, right? I overestimated them. Well, maybe you're right, but like, everything is so algorithmic based, you get fed what you like, you know what I mean? So it's not like they're not really getting outside stuff, right? They're not already into it So I think it's maybe I think it's possible that they do and I'm not saying that like The internet should not be used for educational purposes, right? I'm just saying like why does every kid in a class need a phone in their pocket? We went hundreds of years without it, right? It was totally fine. Yeah. Oh, I agree That would drive me nuts if I was a teacher. Yeah No, I can't put them away They knew it too when they developed these phones that they wanted them to be addictive. And they've got their wish. They are. I mean, what about when we were like loading the plane, you know, getting onto the plane, and there's one of the baggage handlers. The whole time her face is just all the way... I mean, pretty soon their necks are going to start growing at a horizontal level because that's all she did. She never even looked up once. Must have been something really interesting going on there. I don't know. I guess all I saw her doing was these long fingernails flipping. You know, just flip, flip, flip. That's the thing, right? You're flipping because nothing is interesting. But you need to get that thing. What's that next thing? What's the next thing? What's the next thing? Agreed. That's why we do a three-hour podcast. We're the anti-gratification. I was like, next thing, next thing. You've got to listen for two and a half hours, you might get a chuckle. Yeah, I don't know. It really surprises me that those two people, the health commissioner and the leader of the superintendents of schools, like, come on, really? Like, you're not against this? Teachers have to be overwhelmingly against this, I would assume. Parents, probably 50-50. I could see the argument, well, school shootings, I need to know immediately, But what's your kid going to do, you know? Call you and you call them, the phone rings. That's not good, right? No. You don't want to call attention to your, I don't know. It's messy. I had a great teacher at Champlain College for computer stuff, and Frank Canavachel. What's your class? Computer stuff. Whatever it was. But anyway, um, and he said, if I see anybody with their head straight down and fight, if you're on your phone, or you're watching, looking at something on your monitor, and instead of paying attention to me, just get up and leave now. But see, this was like, what, 10 years ago? More than that. More than that now. Yeah. So because I was in my 50s, when I started taking computer stuff, computer courses. Yeah, I've been like previous roles I would observe teachers and I'd sit in the back and I see students, so I'm seeing the students' laptops. It's YouTube videos, it's cartoons, they're chatting, I mean it's like they're completely at best multitasking, at worst just checked out. Wow. Wow. I checked out on my own when I was in school. Right. I didn't need to scream. You got imagination. Looking out the window. Look out the window like, what's that bird doing? I don't know what you mean. Matt's looking out the window. He's like, I wonder if Mickey Mantle is going to hit 60 this year. Pretty much. Moving on, there's an effort to crack down on recent spike in car break-ins in Vermont. Hmm, do you know anyone? Did I tell you what happened? No. Did I tell you? I think you told us, but I don't remember the details. I told you on Tuesday. Yeah, yeah. So I finally got the police report for my break-in and theft of my car. Apparently it happened before 9 o'clock, just before 9 o'clock. They had video, I don't know where the video was from, of five individuals entering our carport, seven minutes later, seven minutes later, the car left, and then they found the car on Colchester Avenue, abandoned, and somebody else was trying to steal it. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. It took them only seven minutes to break your window and do whatever it takes? That's a lot of, you say only, I would say I can't believe it took them that long. Don't they watch movies? Don't they have TikTok? Don't they have YouTube? So also, five of them, that's pretty crowded. Plus, one of the seats has glass all over it now, you know? But what I want to know is, where was the video from? Maybe across the street? Across the street. They finally fixed it. Yes! Oh, that's fantastic. UVM. Yeah. But if we had a motion light, they probably would have left. Because they would have had to have been out there in the light for seven minutes. No, I know. Yeah, I know that, but or, you know, I don't trust our neighbors. I think they could have been out there for 70 minutes. And I think they could have been doing, they could have been burning the place. Just setting off air horns? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And nothing would happen. Just to let everybody, we weren't here at the time. And my units on the other side away from the, but also we were asleep. Yeah. Exactly. You go to bed early. and you're on the other side of the building. We would have heard it. I think I would have heard something. You know me. You know? We gotta get you a gun, Glo. I thought of getting like a BB gun. No, no, no, like a real gun. But I only want you to do warning shots. Like shoot up near? Yeah. Hey, that's a great idea. Yeah. No, really, because, I mean, I don't want to miss and hit somebody's car. No, you lean out the window, you see this group of hooligans, You say, any of you cowboys wanna effin' try me? Pow, pow, pow, and they scatter. Wait a minute, what if they turn their guns on me? Well, you duck. You duck? It is a brick building. It should be fine. Might have a few broken windows, but... You just gotta be fast. I think that's a great idea. I thought of the camera. I love it. Yeah, cameras only go so far. We need a vigilant neighbor with a hair trigger. Yeah, that's me. Well, you're just the woman for the job. I am. I always wanted to be like a, I don't know. Think about the entire, all of the residents in this building. Who's the one that should have a gun? It ain't us, Matt. And you think it should be me? It's Annie Oakley over here. I don't want to have a gun. I'm not a gun guy. Your neighbor? No! No, are you kidding? He'd fire it and lift up off the ground. These guys across the hall, they're stoned. They're fine. Well, and the other neighbor you mentioned is probably dead drunk. No, I'm not. No, I'm not saying. Anyway. Anyway, so back to this new law, or whatever they're trying to crack down. So, I don't understand this sentence. Under current Vermont law, if someone enters your car but doesn't steal it, it's not illegal. That's the sentence, because there's only four sentences in the whole story. That's where I like my stories, man, four sentences. But that's what, that sentence jumped out. Really? So, this is, so entering is different than breaking in. If they break my window, it's not illegal? No. It's gotta be. No, that's illegal. But what they're saying is, if you unlock, if you leave your doors unlocked and they enter, that's not illegal. Isn't that what they're saying? I think so. We call it the moron tax. This is, yeah, it's crazy. I don't care. I mean, it's, uh, Yeah, who doesn't lock their doors these days? I mean, it occasionally happens, but No, not really. People still don't lock their doors at night. How many front porch foreign people are still saying, my car was broken into, yada yada, and what was stolen, and oh, I forgot to lock my doors. And you know what? I don't blame them. Sorry. I just feel like if you want to leave your doors unlocked, damn it, you should be able to. That's who I am. But, you know, once I had a gun. If I had a gun. Look, two things. You should be able to leave your doors unlocked. Also, I should be able to execute you on sight. Oh, no, you just want to scare him. That's right. You don't want to kill him. Right. But I'd have to go out the window to do that, though, because I don't want to shoot through the roof. No, we're not shooting through the roof. You're leaning out. You're getting their attention. You're screaming at them. Sometimes that's enough. I've seen you stop a fight. You've just been screaming, stop it. Imagine you've got a gun. You could have stopped the brawl. I needed you at January 6th. So we'll see what happens. Hopefully this penalty becomes a little bit stiffer. Like, you just enter my car. I don't like that. I don't like that. I don't think that's right. I'm sorry. In Florida, you shoot somebody for doing that. Yeah, and then you're scot-free. You're a Fox News commentator. National hero. Did the police ever catch these hooligans? No. They said five hooded individuals. That's the entire population of Vermont when this happened in October. were. Cool. Yeah. All right, got some good news stories. Or maybe just one. Vermont's El Perrier St. Pierre. What a name. She's now the fastest woman in the world. Right? 1000. Is it a mile? Yeah, she ran an indoor mile faster than Oh, she's the fastest American in the world. Oh, yeah. Sorry. Sorry, Kenya, but also female or yeah. Yeah, female. Okay. I feel like we're like downgraded here. The fastest American woman in the world to run an indoor mile. I don't think you have to say in the world. If you just say American, right? Isn't that the fastest woman in America? Maybe there's some chick in Singapore who was born in America who's just blazing. Oh, that's right. Never mind. Yeah. I forgot. This is a year after she gave birth. What? All you ladies who just gave birth are on notice. She's 28 years old, which is old for a runner. Not a mother. Yeah. And you know, she has no stretch marks. See what? She has no stretch marks. Oh, well, I'm pretty sure like she's in very good shape. I said she was a sprinter. She's not a sprinter. She's a miler. So this is probably right in her wheelhouse right now. I mean, she might have stretch marks. I mean, it's hard to tell when she's blurring by the camera, right? I mean, I don't know. Have you seen some stretch marks? I guess I... Oh, yourself. That's right. Never mind. Yeah, I'm not the fastest American man to run an indoor mile. Yeah, so one of her first track races since giving birth to her son, Ivan. Wow. Ivan Saint Pierre, or is it Purier Saint Pierre? Yeah, I don't know. You're the only French in this. Me, yeah. No. Saint Pierre, just Saint Pierre. She says, for all the moms out there, I'm sure the moms are like, thanks a lot. I'm over here struggling with postpartum depression and You're setting records. Actually, running might help. Well, you get that runner's high. I never got it, but obviously, these people do. I mean, they wouldn't be doing this if they didn't. They're really good. You only run for the high. You don't just run. She finished 10th at the Tokyo Olympics in the 1,500 meter sprint. When was that? What year? 2021. 2021? COVID. COVID. She was a top American in the race. I wonder why she lives in Vermont. What, she went to high school here? At Richford? Yeah. I assume she could live anywhere. I assume there's training facilities in other places that maybe have more modern stuff going on. I don't know. Well, or it could be we have cleaner air then let's say she runs indoors oh yeah really only in doors moving on pop-up dental clinics all over the Upper Valley this is interesting They're offering some help for people who wouldn't normally get their teeth cleaned. One thing I found interesting about this is they do something I've never heard of. They do a technique. So I'm trying to find... Okay, yeah. They use silver diamine fluoride and glass ionomer cement to fill cavities without a drill. Whoa, whoa, wait a minute, so that means, because the drill is only to really clean out whatever is gone bad, I thought. I thought the drill was just to punish you because you don't brush it up and you eat too many sweets. So is it a van or is it like they move from like a leased apartment, I mean leased office space, how does that work? It's an old pickup truck with a mattress in the back. I don't know what it is, like it's a pop-up, I mean, I'm looking at this photo, it looks like it's a... Yeah, like what's a pop-up? Like a big RV? That kind of pop-up? I don't know. I mean, pop-up might mean they go to an existing structure, but they just bring all their equipment. Yeah, that's what I mean. Maybe it's like in the back of a Walgreens or something. Yeah. I don't know. Good for them. Oh, maybe this one was at the VA Medical Center? Oh, no, he was in the VMA. Where does it pop up? I don't know where pops up glow. Oh, the Hartford office of the Vermont Agency of Human Services And they had one mobile clinic set up shop in a parking lot of Walmart in West Lebanon In a parking lot? Yeah, sounds like they do have a big mobile home or something So they set up a tent? No, like a... A mobile home? An RV? It's too cold for a tent. It's not the Civil War. I would assume it's an RV, maybe. It's just a van. I don't know, you know. Who knows? Good for them. Yeah. But they're filling cavities without a drill. We're skirting right by. I know. The most important thing. Exactly. So maybe I should ask my dentist about this. Hey, what do you think of this thing that you don't even have to clean it, you know? I bet he... Because, yeah, it was, I thought, well, to kind of round out everything, but to get rid of all the crud that was in there. That's what I always thought. So I don't know. Maybe this kills the crud. That's it. Could be a crud killer. A crud killer. Maybe it's like, you know what? You don't get the real surface. It's a pop-up. We're just going to like, it's not getting any worse. Boom. Here's a band-aid on your tooth. That's like filling a pothole that's really deep with that just temporary patch and then of course it falls apart yeah as quickly as like a week. Why do they do that? It can't be cost-effective. No, no, of course not. It's busy work. Really, I mean what else can they do? Gotta get these junkies on it. I mean when's it done? It's done a lot in the winter time, right? Filling potholes? I thought you did it in the spring. Maybe gives them something to do. It really is stupid, because the next week they're just... Yeah, if you're going to do it in the winter time, it's... Alright, speaking of dentists, we've got a big upcoming vote in Rutland. They're deciding whether or not they want to add fluoridation to the water. I thought they already would have fluoridation. If they want to stop adding fluoridation to the water. A lot of people think that it's not good for, like, the very healthy-minded people. They believe having fluoridation. It's only the healthy-minded people. I would say that is part of it. But also those cuckoos, the ones that, what do you call them? They always think there's a back story to every story. What's it named? Conspiracy Theorist. Yes. Yeah, yeah. Yes. They said that supposedly Hitler threw that in the water somewhere and then. It's like, pshh. And then what? I don't know. But yeah, it has something. It dumbs you down or something like that. There's no evidence of that. I always think of the movie Dr. Strangelove when I hear this subject, because that's what drove the general crazy. Yeah, this is Florida water. So it was a joke back then. Yeah, but now it's a it's becoming more mainstream And as glow mentioned it is these two factions, right? It's the hippie dippy health nuts the yoga health nut freak people who are like Vaccines cause autism then there's the conspiracy. There's somehow they like met in this weird like far left Screwjobs far right nut jobs and they've met in the middle to like their marriage beautiful with this existence. Mixed marriage. Yeah. So weird. I guess no one from, no one like actually showed up from the town supporting fluoridation, but they had a lot of people anti-fluoridation. Yeah, so one woman said, why is it that the public works commissioner is able to practice medicine without a license? He's essentially prescribing medication, putting it directly into our water. Good point. I mean, yes. There's an assumption that it's been proven medically sound. They do quote some dentists in the article and they say, yeah, you should do it. It's better. But no one wants to hear from an expert, right? No, they just want to be anti-whatever it is. Oh, the other thing that conspiracy theorists say is also because fluoride is a waste product and it's a great way to get rid of it. It's like, you know, that's how they get rid of it is just dumping it in water. And that's the excuses really. It's just a waste product. Anyway, just remember, it's all coming back to me. Those 11 years in Middlesex. So I guess they voted for this in 2016. And it failed. So coming up again, back again, let's see what happens. And last, before we take a break, we missed free ice fishing day. Thanks a lot, Glow. Wait a minute. Is there even enough ice anywhere to go ice fishing? Apparently. I thought you guys had a very mild January. No, in the lakes. There are smaller lakes and ponds. There's plenty. OK. But I thought it. OK. But we didn't hear about it because there's no Glow event roundup. So there was no warning. Remember you were going to do something about like let us know what's going on and just like About this? No about like just events in general and you kind of like Oh that's right, darn So we missed it We would have liked to have been out there on the ice Oh yeah Ever ice fished? No My roommate ice fished That's a no I don't trust it man like look at this picture of like all these people out on the ice I don't know I don't know. Yeah, I guess they're supposed to, if there's eight inches of ice, it's fine. Anything over eight inches. So this was 12 inches, they said. That's the ice. But yeah, that would make me very nervous to be out there. But this is what the person says, who's pro... What's this person's role? Um... Thomas, what do they do? Anyway, they're pro. They say, ah, everything has a risk. It's like, okay, but like, and they say, and the benefits of the safety are really fabulous. The benefits and the safety are really fabulous. They definitely outweigh the possible risks involved. Well, the risk is death. And the benefit is I don't catch, the benefit is I maybe catch a fish. Right. I don't know. Like, I could buy fish. I don't know. I don't get it. The fish even edible that they catch out of here? What do they catch? Some of them. I thought there wasn't really- Perch and bass, I don't know. I wouldn't probably eat anything that got in this lake. Three men last year fell through and drowned in a tournament on Lake Champlain. Three men. Probably not novices, also probably not sober. I would not be on the ice out here at Lake Champlain. No. I mean, unless it's like a really small cove. But even so, I still don't like going out on ice. And is it like one of those things where like more people makes it less safe because they're heavier? Yeah, think of all the extra weight Not for me Not for me. Yeah, I never saw what was So great about it. Are you ready for a break? Yep. All right. Yeah, that's more Vermont hip-hop This is from toadstool and Rico James. The song is one long bad day I'm going to do a little bit of work on this side, so I'm going to do a little bit of work on the other side, so I'm going to do a little bit of work on the other side, so I'm going to do a little bit of work on the other side, so I'm going to do a little bit of work on the other side, so I'm going to do a little bit of work on the other side, so I'm going to do a little bit of work on the other side, so I'm going to do a little bit of work on the other side, so I'm going to do a little bit of work on the other side, so I'm going to do a little bit of work on the other side, so I'm going to do a little bit of work on the other side, so I'm going to do a little bit of work on the other side, so I'm going to do a little bit of work on the other side, so I'm going to do a little bit of work on the other side, so So in Reap, the woes you preach, your soul gets pieced Deuces up till the sky falls Probably smoking herb and the burps pumping pipe all Your poppin' verses, man, they feel like drywall Your poppin' circumstance has seemingly just died off The swell is one tall ashtray Nicorette patch with a cigarette bad day I kinda rap like my house always halfway It's hip-hop till I'm packed in that masquerade Masquerade lookin' like one tall ashtray Sashay lookin' tight, one long bad day Masquerade looking like one tall, hash tray, sashay, looking tight One long, bad day Masquerade looking like one tall, hash tray, sashay, looking tight One long, bad day Masquerade looking like one tall, hash tray, sashay, looking tight One long, bad day Uh, the graves are marked and still I gotta pay to park This is Providence when faith is dark I stay gracious and play the part I aim aimless and spray to start To vacate all fading hearts, create the art That's all that makes sense I could make too much It's still wouldn't make sense syndrome imposter trying to break bread sick flows been romping in a great sesh Every 16 is like an earthquake pristine with the birthday system with words paint little pipsqueak should learn grace Blitzkrieg in the worst way play to your nerve shake Catch me in your dreamland two blunts in each hand floating overhead like the second coming and I ain't trying to preach man I'm just really saying what's next the earth is really next to nothing I'm going to make a hole in the back of the head. I'm going to make a hole in the back of the head. I'm going to make a hole in the back of the head. Sashay cookin' tight, one long bad day, last rave lookin' like, one tall ass tray, Sashay cookin' tight That's a Rico James comin' through with a beautiful production Shout out to Man Bites Dog's records, shout out to my cat Dusty Shout out, shout out to everybody who listened And, yeah And we're back! All right, first story, our Vermont roadside pun writers might have to rein it in. Pun writers? What do you mean puns? Are they actually like writing things on the road? No, they have the signs. The electric signs, the signs. It says like... Tell you if there's snow coming or ice. Oh, yeah. They get a little cheeky, like camping in the woods, not in the left lane. Ah, I like that. What's wrong with that? Visiting in-laws? Slow down. Be late. If you hate tickets, raise your right foot. That's pretty good. I think that's great. So what's the problem? All of those signs are done by two people. I'll get to the problem in a second close, sorry. Rachel Noyes, she is a... I can't even say what she does. She works for the Vermont Agency of Transportation. And the other one is Ryan Knapp, who is the agency's Intelligent Transportation System Chief. She's the manager. She's the outreach manager. So these two are the ones who come up with all the puns and the jokes or whatever. What a great job. You know why? Because it's going to catch your attention. You're going to read it. Otherwise, you're just going to blow by it. Just like, oh, because it's the same sign all the time. Nobody pays attention to it. It just becomes, you know, boring. No Valentine? Your seatbelt will hold you. That's great. What else? You may sparkle, but don't drive lit. Oh my gosh. Did they make these up themselves? They do, and I guess the public has also added submissions. So they said they've been flooded with one-liners. That's cool. Get the public involved. You imagine like you're driving down the road like, you know, let's say it's International Flirting Week. You're on a date and you're like, see that? See that sign? That's mine. That's an old Adam original. So the problem, Glo, is that the US government has gotten involved. Don't they have better things to do? Probably not. Well, this falls under the purview of the Federal Highway Administration, and they have released an updated 1,100 page manual that spells out how signs and other traffic control devices are regulated. It's not a law, but the agency strongly recommends against overhead electronic signs intended to be funny. There will be no Huma on the highways! Did they explain why? They just said that the government said the signs should be simple, direct, brief, legible, and clear. And not funny. It snaps you out of that trance sometimes. Or, because it is funny, it puts a smile on your face and it probably slows you down right there. You think driving happy makes you drive slower? Yeah, I think so you pissed off man. You get the lead foot. Oh, it's probably true. Yeah, you're happy Snoop Dogg over here They say messages should feel fulfill a need command attention convey a clear simple message, command respect. This sounds like the US government. This is like- When was this written anyway? I look at the stop sign, I'm like, I respect that. I look at the yield sign, I'm like, I don't respect that. And provide adequate time for proper response. Yeah, so it's unclear what's gonna happen. Right now they can still proceed, but the whole thing may be revisited. And we might lose a little bit of humor. It's got a it's got a good Vermont vibe to it, though Don't you think yeah, of course see the shit in Tennessee? Yeah forget, Florida Florey's get billboards. It says like God is coming to kill you That's okay, though. Yeah, that's fine Like yeah, could we just say like we don't have billboards? We have this that's right. Yeah, aren't billboards more distracting. Oh Absolutely. And ugly. Ron Jon's bikini babe up there? Yeah. And then the ones that keep changing digitally. You know, say, wait, wait, what's going on? That catches your attention. That stuff. The digital ones. And not in a good way. Because you're trying to read the whole thing as you're driving into the next lane, probably. No? I mean, I don't know. I feel like billboards to me are like pop-up ads on a website. I've like I've kind of like tuned them out. They don't really bother me So, but they are so ugly. I mean that one billboard I remember South of the border. Oh, remember that? Oh, yeah Still there you see him all the time up night 95. I'm down 95 south of the border Yeah, we bought some fireworks there one And what is it? It's just this cheesy store. It's got a lot of fireworks and it's just got this theme to it, you know, that it's Mexico or something. It's not like a Mexican restaurant or something? Yeah, I mean, yeah, they have food, but it's, you know, probably the real Mexican food. But, you know, yeah, it's kind of cool. It's got a lot of fireworks. It's like a Chili's with fireworks. Yeah, but they do so much advertising. They did anyways. You know, at the time. There's also one out west. I'm not sure what Colorado I am it's like Bert's Farm, I don't know. It was something like that and it was the same thing It was like miles and miles of billboards of the same place Well, that's what Ron John's did right and they turned into a profitable business Really? Ron John's Surf Shop? Wow, I didn't know that Well, if you look at billboards, I mean I mean, coming from Florida, where it's full of billboards, but I also remember those little theme parks that used to be all around up and down in Florida, like we used to go to one in Fort Myers, it was a western town, my grandfather took us down there, you know, that kind of stuff. You know, Weeki Wachee with the mermaids. That's still going. It's still going. Oh, what's that one? Those kind of things. That was big billboards. Something outdoor safari. Yeah. Out of there in West Palm. Yeah. Yeah, there's all sorts of stuff in there in Florida. Seminoles. They, you know, they had a lot of stop and, you know, they have billboards on 41 going down towards Naples and stuff. Moving on, Bellows Falls, I thought this was gonna be more interesting than it was, so we can move on pretty quickly, but I don't even really know much about Bellows Falls. I was thinking it was a different place. Bellows Falls is where exactly? We've been there. Yeah, it has a cute little downtown. It's a narrow street here and there, and it's kind of, but is it north or south of what's the junction? The one that- White River? Petticoat? White River. It's south of White River. It's south of White River. So it's on that side. So apparently they're transforming the historical riverfront park into an oasis. What's that? What's an oasis? It doesn't really make any sense. They're just trying to revitalize it. This article goes on, it's like a long history of what happened to this area. It's like, I don't know. I guess it's a place to rest your camel. It's an oasis. I mean, they're restoring a part of the town that probably needs restoring. Good for them. And they're connecting it to the trail system. I'd like to go back again. We didn't really walk, did we? Yes, I think we did. Okay. So, yeah, it's an interesting place. There's so many of those little towns in Vermont. They were industrial at one time, a lot of brick, old brick, generally next to rivers and things like that. Or railroad lines. They've seen their better days and they're holding on. The locals hold it together somehow. But it's just, you know, there's so many of those towns in Vermont. But that didn't look so bad though. I didn't think those falls looked... No, I don't think any of it looked horrible. It makes it look interesting, actually, because so much of it is, you know, you still see the old barns and people's backyards back in the day, and you know, it's almost like... I don't think any of these towns look horrible. I think they just, you know, because the people who live there take care of them, or do their best. So, anyways. All right, moving on to a short-term rental property owner seeking permit for party house. This was a Catalonian record store. I cannot open it. Okay. Hold on a second. Are you a Kadonian Records subscriber? I actually started subscribing yesterday. Look at this guy. I was gonna tell you. This is the only newspaper that I will buy in this state. It is one that I hated as a kid because it was so conservative, but it's still a newspaper. So I think I gotta go to my other one. Hold on a second. Yeah, I can't get it either. Oh well. Well, anyways, the only thing that needs to be paid for is the one that won't open. I know, I had to go to my other server. Your other server? Whatever. You make it sound like we're in this big computer room. Where's the mainframe, Glo? Let's hack the network here. Oh, God, I was working when things were so ridiculous. I mean, what we have now in our phone would have been an entire room and it's freezing too on top of everything, you know, for the same power. Okay, I got it now. So there's a short term rental property owner seeking permit to for a party house, I guess some houses get designated as party houses an official label that I can put on Airbnb like that's I can filter a party house. What makes a party house? Come with cocaine? Well, the one rental home has a reputation as a party house. It's all you need. It has been the subject of many complaints from the neighbors. So, come live here. Everyone around you will hate you for a weekend. The owner wants to get it designated as a party house. So he can still wipe. What does that mean? What does it mean to be a party house? Does he have to now be a business? So, he will be having, I'm sure, whatever that would need a license. So, does he have to apply for a license in order to be a bar? You know, that kind of thing. It's not real. The town sent a notice of violation. Okay, which agreed to drop exchange for GLOWIS compliance for the whatever that he's trying to permit. But they're going to have a discussion about it. and they think a lot of neighbors are gonna show up. But it just struck me funny, the terminology, as, oh, this is a party house, but sanctioned by the city. Yeah, so what's my house? Like a boring, old fart house? Have you ever been to Kirby? Kirby? Vermont. Kirby, Vermont? I'm not sure where that is. where this town is. It's up in the, it's outside of St. Johnsbury. I think it's between St. Johnsbury and Lindenville or something. Okay, so how close are your neighbors? That, well, I haven't been there many many years, but there's, 20 years ago there was nothing up there. You know, people were, you know. It was big farms. Yeah, big farms and, but Also, a lot of houses, but they had enough property where you're not right on top of each other, so... But, I don't know. It's probably all changed, like everything else. But still, what does it mean to be designated as a party house? It doesn't say in the story. I know. We'd all want to know. Well, I'm going to cancel my subscription. Well, like, what if I want to be a party house? What do I need? Do I need, like, some sunglasses and a cool soundtrack? Like, how do I become a party house? I don't know. We're not even supposed to be in an Airbnb, so... I want to know, if you're designated a party house, so that means you get different rules? Excuse me sir, are you zoned for party? Right. Yes, I'm zoned. So you can be louder? I don't know, like, what does it mean? Have more people? Or parking, whatever. Do you have to have enough parking? Higher occupancy, like the fire marshal? Could be. What is a party house? Is there going to be food? Is there going to be... Some hors d'oeuvres? Is there a dip? Are there going to be strippers? Probably. Interesting. Bellows Falls... Oh no, not Bellows Falls. Yeah, Bellows Falls, right? We already talked about that one. Where are we here? We're on the Miss Vermont Earth. No, I mean, like, what city was that? Kirby? Kirby. Kirby. Kirby. Kirby Port House. Interesting. Kirby, it's in the sticks. Not sticks, but it's up in the hills a little bit. What's the, uh, where the library is, where half of it is in Canada and half is in Vermont? What's that town? Derby. It is Kirby. Derby. Oh, Derby. Oh, that's right. Derby Line. Yeah, Derby. Okay. So this one's Kirby. Kirby all right yeah I had a cousin that lived there all right moving on to close did you know there was something called miss Vermont earth no there is mr. Mars she did not win miss earth so we have miss America yeah miss USA miss earth miss universe am I missing one of them we must have a miss Vermont that Yeah, and there's a Mrs. in Vermont. Mrs.? There's a Mrs.? There's a Mrs. in Vermont. Yeah, she has to be married? Yes. What kind of Puritan bullshit is that? Well, it's in a... I don't know. Is she supposed to be with child, or...? No! I want my Mrs. Vermont free-swinging, unattached. Like, I don't want to... I want to think I got a shot, you know? Like, I guess it's just something in reaction. You know, have women who may be a few years older? I don't know. Who's watching that? Who's watching any of these? It's just a point. So Miss Vermont Earth has made the news. She's helping young girls around the world gain access to education and health care. Her name is Isabella Williams. She vied for the title, the national title of Miss USA Earth in Florida, but she lost to Danielle Mullins, who is from, God, Kentucky. That's disappointing. Matt, I put a link to all the Miss USA Earth contestants. That's just for your own personal research. I'm not sure if you're interested in that. But in the actual showdown of the Miss Earth contestants, Miss USA did not do well. Miss USA was 19th out of the top 20. So this is interesting. You want to guess what countries are represented in the top 20 Miss Earth representatives, Glo? So what countries do you think have the hottest people? Swedes. Sweden. No. and I will say there's a definite bias here. Ethiopia? That's a, nope. Are we getting close by saying Asia? You're very close by saying Asia. Okay, okay, so, well, one of those Asian countries which... I can't name any of them right now. All right, maybe we should move on before we offend. China? There's no China. No, really, they probably not. Oh, they wouldn't. Japan. They weren't invited. Japan. No. South Korea. Indonesia. Although I believe the most beautiful women are from South Korea. No, no South Korea. Indonesia. Oh, wasn't that nice. Indonesia. Number nine, Cindy and Nanto. That's a lot. Anyway, give us the top five. All right. I'll give you the top eight. Number eight, Russia. Number seven, Netherlands. Number six, I'm gonna call foul on this, Kazakhstan? Who, where? Kazakhstan? You're kidding, one of those stands? Number five, Brazil? Of course. You know they have fake boobs. They all do. Hold on, I'm gonna look up this young lady to see if that is indeed a fact. This is for research purposes. You're actually seeing if she's got fake boobs? Well, some of it you can tell. Because they look like globes. I'm gonna say maybe not, but also like, there's not really a good, I'm not gonna do a deep dive into it. But is it only based on beauty or other things? Well, I mean, what do they say? I'm sure there's a talent portion, and like what are you doing to save the world portion? I don't know. Top four, Thailand, Vietnam, Philippines, and here's a curve ball, Albania. What? No. Are you kidding? I could only think of Mother Teresa. Yeah, that's where she was from. Interesting. And what is even interesting, So they break down the mis-earth into four. I know, I guess, yeah. So there's mis-earth general, mis-earth air, mis-earth water, mis-earth fire. Like the four elements. Wait a minute, what, I mean. It's like a Captain Planet situation. What are we gonna find next? I mean, are we gonna keep breaking this down to ions? Look, I'm just telling you. Look, sometimes we go deep on a topic and we've gone as deep as we can with that. Oh, what is this woman doing in Vermont? Raising awareness. Yeah, raising awareness so that women, gaining young girls, gaining access to education and health care, you know. Shorter book. I didn't write it. Moving on, Bridgerton's Tomgirl Kitchen. Did y'all even know what this was? Yeah. What is it? Well. Not really. I never went in it. I think it started with that corner where it's um, anyway, doesn't matter, St. Paul and used to be a barbershop next to it. Yeah, and there was the yogurt place. Yeah. Shy Guy. Oh, no, no. That's the other side. Yeah, yeah. So anyway, it went through a couple of things. And then she moved, I'm pretty sure to Pine Street along there with those new sort of, you know, updated aluminum buildings that were where I mean like a industrial age not sure I think she was downtown really no not Church Street oh yes yes Main Street way down at the bottom just before the old train station yeah on the left as What did she do? What did she do? Juice stuff. That's it. It was juices. Yeah, that's right. I remember now. It's just, that's what she did. Juices. Like fresh juices. I know. I know. I was, you know, I admire that she hung in there that long. That, you know, it lasted this long. She had a backer. Yeah. And the backer says that's enough. She only owned 41% of the company. Started delivering juice via bicycle in 2012. She's probably making more money doing that. So she doesn't want to close, the backer's closing. I guess the business wasn't doing well. They have a sign on their window, they misspelled permanently, and then closed. It's that attention to detail that is why maybe this business is not doing well. If you're misspelling permanently. But the woman, what's her name? Kammerer? Kammerer? Kammerer? Yeah. The, that's her first name. Oh, Gabrielle says that she's, will focus on a new fortune telling and intuitive counseling venture. Pretty poison. Now, the easiest joke in the world It's like, didn't you see your business closing coming? I mean, intuitive counseling is a very funny phrase to me. It's like someone comes to you and they need some counseling, you're like, I know. I knew that. I knew you were going to say that. I'm like, yeah, I feel like you should probably, they're like, I don't really know, but my intuition tells me. Like, I don't have any training, but I got a good feeling. So anyway, she's got to move on to incorporate astrology, crystals, and energy work into the subterranean version of Tomgirl. Subterranean? What do you mean? Pretty Poison. What? And her new venture, Pretty Poison, might get its own brick and mortar with tea, chocolate, and crystals. You're not a crystal person are you, Glo? I was at one time. I had crystals. There was even a place out on past... Plainfield that was like an old factory and they had like all... I mean it was a factory and they had all these crystals and I went there and I bought a bunch. What for? I don't know. It was the... It was that hippie chick in you. Yeah, I had to prove myself that I could do it and I did enough. All right, moving on. So we go from one failed business to a success. You got a five-year-old out doing that old Tom girl. He's selling potholders. He? His name is Ari? No, no, no. Maybe I'm wrong. Oh, yeah. It's a son. Yeah, OK. No kidding. He's a boy. You thought that was a girl? Oh, he does that stuff. I've seen those. What's it called? They. I don't know. I don't want to be... Oh, yeah! Oh, this is so cool! We made those. Someone gave this kid a pot holder loom as a gift. There was one free right down the street. I mean, that's where I got it. I did. I picked it up and I said, What am I crazy? And I put it back. Now, this kid's out here making money for hospitals. For hospitals? Yeah, he makes these and sells them. And he splits the... It seems like he splits the profits. Oh, he's splitting it. He's keeping some. Well, R's got to get his taste, too, right? Well, not only that, he's got to pay for all this stuff. Well, I'm pretty sure he's... They're beautiful. This kid got some talent. I mean, he really is talented. He did a show at Foam Brewers. He did a show? He set up a booth. The poster explained his mission. By the end of the night, he had sold a couple dozen potholders and made more than $200, about $100 of which was destined to the art from the heart. Program. What do you think one of these pot holders go for? Five bucks? Sounds like more than people were giving Donations Yeah, that's a whole If you say donation only you make more money. Oh, he's got I say he's got his taste. Yeah, you know He's got a good old taste. Yeah, I always got a good for him lifestyle. He's got a maintained I guess he's very diligent at this he's He's very detail-oriented and dexterous, so it fit into his attention span. Is that a nice way of saying, on the spectrum? I'm not trying to besmirch this kid, I'm just saying. He's a good, sweet kid. Yeah, he's a good kid. He's a great kid. I'll edit that out. So, speaking of things that are catching fire. Come on, Matt. That was a good segue. It was. SUV burst into flames at a Brandon gas station. Were they like smoking a cigarette and pumping gas at the same time? No one was injured when an SUV burst into flames at a gas station in Brandon. It happened at a Cicco on the corner of Route 7 and McConnell Road. A police chief says one of his officers ran to the store to get employees to shut the pumps off while two others blocked people from pulling into the gas station. Oh my gosh, they say this already on fire and they're still gonna... no. No one was inside the vehicle so no one was injured. There's no yet on what's no yet. No word yet What sparked the blaze? Sounds suspicious Yeah, what is this? This is an insurance scam could be On their lease or whatever like start pumping gas walk away walk away a little match in there But it sounds like the the cops were on it pretty quickly. Yep. Good job by them But like yeah, it looks like it was fully burned down. Do you look at this photo? It was an electric vehicle, right? Just an SUV? They don't mention the brand. Why don't you mention the brand? Yeah, I think that's an important piece of the information. Is this a Toyota? Is this a Bronco? What are we dealing with? Alright, we'll just have to move on. This remains a mystery. Another mystery is how do you pronounce the capital city of New Hampshire? Not necessarily a Vermont story, but... It has some relevance to Vermont, and I'll get to that in a minute. A New Hampshire lawmaker wants to amend state law to include an official pronunciation of the capital city, one of many communities called Concord? That's what I would say. Across the country. While North Carolina is pronounced the second syllable, so it rhymes with board, Concord, New Hampshire, Mass, and California are among those who favor something closer to the words of Julius Caesar. Conquered. Oh. You know, it's funny how you can come up with so many different pronunciations. I like the old Yankee folks who would pronounce it, Cac-id. Cac-id. Cac-id. Well, see, my relevance, because I said, why don't we have a New Hampshire story? But I realized there is a Conquered Vermont. Oh. What's going on there? It's going east of St. Johnsbury along Route 5. But right before you get to New Hampshire, it's Conquered Vermont. My aunt Jeanette and Uncle Dick lived there with their five kids in a 300 year old house. Conquered. So yeah, so what do you think is going on? It's gonna be conquered, right? Conquered? Now, maybe I just read that now I'm saying it. Conquered. Conquered. I would say conquered. Conquered. Where did it say it was? Concord? Oh, New England. North Carolina. Okay. Concord. They don't know, they're dumb down there. Yeah, and I remember being on the BART line out when I lived out in the Bay Area. It was Concord. Yeah, those are grapes, right? How do you say the grapes? Concord. Concord grapes? Yeah. Alright, well, we figured it out. We're so good. We should be in the State House. Alright, we're gonna take another break, right? Yep. So, this is a jam band from Vermont. They do long songs. Probably not gonna play the whole song. It might fade out of it, so no offense to the band. This is Moondogs. The song is Switchback. I can't believe I'm going to be able to do this. I'm going to be able to do this. I'm going to be able to do this. I'm going to be able to do this. I'm going to be able to do this. I'm going to be able to do this. I'm going to be able to do this. I'm going to be able to do this. I'm going to be able to do this. I'm going to be able to do this. I'm going to make a hole in the middle of the back. I'm going to make a hole in the middle of the back. I'm going to make a hole in the middle of the back. I'm going to make a hole in the middle of the back. I'm going to make a hole in the middle of the back. I'm going to make a hole in the back of the head. I'm going to make a hole in the back of the head. I'm going to make a hole in the back of the head. I'm going to make a hole in the back of the head. I'm going to make a hole in the back of the head. I'm going to make a hole in the back of the head. I'm going to make a hole in the middle of the back. I'm going to make a hole in the middle of the back. I'm going to make a hole in the middle of the back. I'm going to make a hole in the middle of the back. I'm going to make a hole in the middle of the back. I'm going to make a hole in the middle of the back. Too many things You're off key If I switch back That's when you Then we're back Alright So it's time for America's favorite segment Where we run down the worst people in Vermont Perverts Floridians No offense Jan and Greg but It's time for the scumbag map. So we start with a good news story, scumbag averted, this isn't Vermont, but it's right across the lake. It was a Vermont, this is a UVM hospital I believe. CVPH? Yeah, I think it is. I think it's part of the UVM network. So there was, so this guy, Glo, he got fired, or he did not get promoted. So he tenured his resignation? Yeah, I guess you could do that if you've worked there for so many years. You're tenured, or is that how it works? He submitted his resignation. This guy was not like, professor. I thought that's what you were saying, but anyway. But tender is tendering his notice to quit. Tendering? Tendering? After tendering his notice to quit. No, he was fired. That's what the story says. Just hold on. Look at it. Because it doesn't sound right. I agree. Tendering. Tenure a resignation. Tender. How to know it says now it's changed it had a tender resignation. What does it mean? Why? Because it's like, you're making it tender. like soft and gentle? No, tender could also be money, right, Matt? Yeah, tender. In some way. Yeah? I mean, it's used as money. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, as a lot of, you know, we do crosswords. We know there's a lot of- Yeah, there's a lot of those stupid variations nobody ever uses. Oh, so, Glo, we're wrong. To tender your resignation means to resign. The expression is a more formal way of saying you're moving on to other employment, Quit the right way, give the appropriate notice, offer to help with the transition, and thank the employer. Okay, that makes sense. Tendering. I don't like when Matt's right. I don't like this feeling. I'm never right. Okay, so this guy tendered his resignation, and then he was fired, which is kind of shitty. Right? Yeah, I mean, but if he already quit, how could he get fired? I'm confused. Well, like, you know, if he might say, just want you to know in a month, I'm out of here. You know, you're out of here tomorrow, you know, Vince McMahon. They, okay, two things here. He didn't get the promotion. They know why. There's got to be some, probably some underlying reason. Well, he's a psychopath. He's a psychopath. You shoot up the hospital. You know, so he gives his resignation, and he's like, no, that's okay, because they know he's a disgruntled employee, which is, in this day and age, that's a terrible thing. Maybe that's why you can't get fired, because people are just scared of getting shot up. Right. I'd fire him, but... I know he'd come back and kill us all. So now he just works here forever. Yeah, so then, I guess his brother was vigilant. and was aware that like the guy who got fired is a potential shooter he said things like everyone in management is dead. Wow. And he has a lot of weapons. Yeah. So the cops got him on his way there. Oh before he got to kill him? Because his brother called it in. All right. He's the hero. I'm sure he doesn't feel like it. He doesn't? Well he might. His brother's locked up now. Yeah. It's probably not a great feeling. Yeah. He had a rat on his brother. You know, I don't know. That's true. That's true. No, I feel the same way. If I knew my brother had done something really bad, I'd turn him in. Yeah, exactly. They got him a mile away. Yeah. Good story. That's a good story for the scumbag, Matt. Well, you know, he was a would-be scumbag who could not be a is scumbag. Right. So, but you know, I don't know. I don't know. The Sarah George have any sway over Plattsburgh could be out in the streets in a couple weeks. Oh, God, I hope not. I've got a bunch of DUI stories. Lydia Brooke. 25. Okay, let's let's let's just sit on that. Okay. 25 school bus driver. And that about 30 years too young to be a school bus driver. Normally people close to retirement or retired. Yeah, like this person hasn't had a hard enough life yet to be a school bus driver. You just got off the bus. Right, like how can you be 25 and hate kids that much? Like you gotta hate kids to be a school bus driver. Or love them. Probably the opposite. Okay, not that way, but... Go ahead, Glow, you gonna say something? Where do you see school? I see driving minivan style bus. That doesn't mean school Where'd you get the school bus? It says school bus crash. Do you I police say ever drive? It's a smaller one. It's not that it's not that that's not the big yellow one It's a short one for the short, you know, no, I think it's just a small area Yeah, rent like how many kids run the bus in Corinth six Please say Vermont woman was impaired behind the wheel when she crashed the school bus. She was driving Vermont State Police were called to a crash just after 5pm. Okay, what do we think? Let's play detective here. School is over at what time? 3 o'clock? Okay. 2.30, 3. Kids are home by, in Corinth, how, was that 3.20? 3.30, maybe. 3.30? It's 5 o'clock. That's, so... Well, where were she? Where were she? Where was she? I like that you're getting into the character as a Corinth detective. Where were you? For all that time. Right, that's the question, right? Because it's like, is she a super scumbag or just kind of a scumbag? Was she drunk when she was driving the kids or was she like, F these kids, I'm off the clock, I'm going right to the bar, I'm having a few. And from 3.30 until 5, she decides to have some, you know, a few beers, whatever, and then gets back in the bus and doesn't realize how drunk she is. Maybe she's the victim. No, I'm just kidding. So, yeah, that is the question. I guess we won't know, right? That's going to be like... We can guess. What do you think? I think I won't say. I don't know, it sounds far-fetched that she went to some bar and only stayed an hour and a half or whatever and left, you know? I don't know, I mean, was she just driving around for an hour and a half? I mean, yeah, she would stay there, but I think she was drinking before, I don't know. I'm suspicious of people. They don't say what she blew. That would be really helpful, right? If it was 2.7... Pfft! Holy shit! If it was 2.7, we'd be like... A corpse was found driving a car. Um, yeah, I don't know, man. I don't... Yeah, that's why I wonder. Was it 80? Was it .80? Yeah. Was it two drinks? Yeah. You know? Or was it .160 or something? You know, which is a lot. Maybe she has, I feel like I'm going like, I feel like now I'm her defense attorney. Maybe she has a water bottle that's mostly Gatorade, but a little bit of vodka just to help her keep her cool. Because you got Billy in the back of the bus who's really out of control and she's like, I can't say nothing, I gotta just maintain, she's just maintaining. She's just maintaining that, she's riding that line between can and can't. You'd think they'd make it a law that bus drivers have to drink. So then, she gets to the bar, and then it's like the old shampoo effect, right? Like, if you've already had one, you had another, it kind of adds to it. So like, now she's like, now she's like, She's pounding them. Yeah, you know, and her boyfriend broke up with her that day, or girlfriend, or an inclusive show. And, you know, maybe like, it just didn't work out. So now she's like really hitting it hard. It's Valentine's Day, and she gets back in the van. Her credit card's not working on the Uber app. She's really frustrated. She's like, I guess I'll just drive. It's not that far. Just a mile down the road. I drove it all the time. Where are you from? Vermont. They should hire you. They get more from you than... Journey. This is Vermont, man. No, she either would, it could go either way. She could have been drinking before, dropping the kids off. Or after, pounding them down, who knows? How far is Corinne from Chelsea? What? As soon as I ask that question, I'm like, who am I talking to? All right, let me look this up. And this will illuminate her route. Because she's from Chelsea, but she does her route in Corrine. Corinth. We had a great bus driver. Seven minutes. That's all? Okay. Now we really have a problem with the hour and a half missing time. Sorry, Matt, you're gonna talk about your bus driver? Oh, no, her name was Ruby Bass. And she was wonderful. She once shot our husband. Because he deserved it. So she was pretty tough, I imagine. Yeah, she shot him, and he sat down and opened up a beer, waiting for the ambulance. Oh my gosh. He was a tough old Cajun. And they stayed together? No. She was a wonderful human being. I've not seen a lot of bars in Corinth, but when I get to Chelsea... Chelsea's full of bars, I bet. No, I don't think there's much there either. We got the Chicken Wiggle Farm Store, probably sells beer. Probably can't crack one open there. Um, I'm not seeing a lot. Maybe she just went home. You know, and drank, and then went back out again. There's no bars in Chelsea. Come on, you're ruining my case here. But you did say there's a market where she could have bought beer? There's a Chicken Wiggle Farm Store, I got Will's Store, I got the free verse farm shop. I'm sure they all sell tall boys at least maybe even wine So she could have gone back in the bus Chug down a few To go home. I know that makes no sense, but it doesn't make any sense. Okay, you know, he's got convinced one juror That's it All right. That's our system. All right, we spent way too much time on that. Maybe not speaking of DUIs the Azen County State Attorney from last week She's on medical leave, maybe from a bruised ego? Could be. A broken heart, wounded pride. So yeah, she is off the job. Embarrassed. Embarrassed, yeah, she's just probably really embarrassed. Yeah, so they say that they're not really talking about what happened. So, Chloe, just to refresh your memory, this is a woman who was, she's a prosecutor. It was after hours, she went to the scene of a death, and she smelled like alcohol, was slurring her speech. State troopers were like, we need to parathylize you. She refused, and they arrested her. And then afterwards, she said she doesn't feel safe in the police community or something. She sent an email out. Wow. So she's got some issues. I think she needs, and this is what this is all about. She needs to take care of him. You think she's an out-of-towner? You think she came up here in the COVID boom and just was hired? And maybe that's a reason why she's kind of on the outs with these guys? I say guys, meaning street troopers who are probably worse than that. I don't think so. My sense is she's been around a long time. She was just elected to her first four-year term. I'd say first and last. Four-year term. If anyone wants to be prosecuted in Addison County, now's your shot. Start gearing up for 2026. I think Glo should do that. I'd rather do things quickly, like shooting out the window. There you go. All right, one more DUI. So moving on to Bellows Falls. Bell Falls man pleaded not guilty to a fourth DUI charge. Cruelty to a child, aggravated domestic assault, and leaving the scene of a crash. Quite the Yahtzee. This guy's a real scumbag. Jesse Bacon is his name. He's 45, he looks 65. This picture of him, I guess his moat shot. They couldn't get his eyes to open? He looked happy. Yeah, he was very happy. Looks like someone's knock-knock joke, and he's like, never heard that one. What a scumbag. So this is what happened. So the police showed up after an altercation. He was sitting in a 2015 Toyota Highlander. He told the police, I don't know why you're here. So he wasn't even leaving. He was just sitting in the car and they arrested him. Wow. So this is what happened. The defendant was pulling on a, so he's at a house, I'm guessing it's a lady he's involved with, her daughter. So this guy was pulling on the daughter's sweatshirt and like kinda choking her, like doing one of those like, one of these like grabbing the collar and twisting it kind of things, causing her to lose the ability to breathe for approximately 10 seconds. That's not good. Now this is where it becomes three stooges. the adult victim then grabbed him by the belt, which caused his pants to fall down. Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. The defendant got off her, tried to use her phone to call a family member, and he hit her phone out of her hand. Nyack, nyack, nyack. Like hitting him. The defendant struck the juvenile in the mouth, causing a small cut on the inside of her lip. She advised the defendant, she advised the defendant, punched her in the right side of her torso. Yeah, that doesn't make any sense. Maybe she claimed... So, they had like a crazy three stooges fracas. And, I guess, hopefully this guy goes back to jail. His attorney says that Bacon is a highly functional man, but noted Bacon acknowledges that he has an issue with alcohol. That's your attorney? Yeah. I'm like, if he's broadcasting that, he's like, well, let's be honest here. He's highly functioning, but he does have a problem. All right, more Caledonia, Matt. Can't read it. Oh, sorry. Sorry? So alleged child porn, man. Oh, come on. I have to go to the, I got to fix that. Because I can't get it on. All right, here we go. Forget it. Let's just move on. The next one is also. Okay. Yeah, I'm having trouble, too. Okay, alleged child porn man charged with sexual assault, Joshua Burbank, this is in the Northeast Kingdom somewhere, it doesn't even say. So he got multiple charges on Monday, including first degree aggravated domestic assault, second degree unlawful restraint, and aggravated assault, sexual assault. And then he was also accused of sexual assault on a woman who was taking medication after her surgery. Oh my God. Like, so I'm guessing she was like knocked out? Yes. That's weird. I don't, like, okay. I know this is not out on the limb, but like, I don't get like that at all. Like, that's like, to me, that's like, God, it's just, you're like a, just a hair away from like necrophilia, I feel like, you know, like, if someone's just like lying there unresponsive, like what even is that? Marriage? That was good. Well, she was a victim said that has the sexual assault assaulted her in 2018, three weeks after her surgery. She was still experiencing long and painful recovery. She was lying in bed after taking her medication trying to recover. What was her surgery? Yeah, that's what I want to know. There's a lot of things I want to know about this story. Yeah, she stated that her medication was making her groggy and causing her to feel weak, so he tried to take advantage of that. God, can you imagine? Fuck, man. Can you imagine someone's in bed, like, recovering, and you're like, Pretty hot. I love you. I love the way you look. I mean, like, pornography exists, you know? Like, if you have those, there's a way to, like, get the evil out, you know what I mean? I mean, this is after he's been charged with child porn, so this guy, this guy may be the scumbag of the year. Wait, so this is, that's not a child that's recovering, that's an adult woman. No, this is a woman. So after he gets arrested for child porn, he gets arrested for this assault. I thought pedophiles were like, kind of, I thought it was like hard, like it was like, I can't control it. It was like this thing that I was like born with. See like this guy very much is just a pervert. Different options. Like he's like, I'll kind of like it all. Yeah. Interesting. I mean, gross, but I've never heard that before. He's kind of a dirtbag. He's in jail? Yeah. For how long? Until Sarah George hears about it. I don't know. So then the next story. I'm sorry. Sorry. I have to get this fixed. You are the Caledonian reporter. Okay, there's that one. That's a more recent one. Let's go to this mysterious substance in an email. We're gonna get there. There's a flow. Okay, this is kind of a misleading headline. From the Caledonian record? I won't hear it, Matt. Okay, I'm canceling my subscription. Thousands of dollars in tools taken in Fairbanks Museum robbery. Now what does that conjure up? Art theft. Wait, what? It's a museum. So you know it's going to be antique. Thousands of dollars of tools taken in Fairbanks Museum robbery. I expect primitive artifacts of early man. Right. Of Vermont early. There was some company working on the building that some scumbag broke into and stole, but the best part about it is, is the employees of the company tracked this guy down. And they, a little vigilante justice. They throttled him a little bit. Really? I think so. They got a hold of him. He had a broken nose when we found him. So, so I saw a brown male, I saw a male in a brown coat running away. Two construction workers were right behind him. One of the workers on top of the bank said the male had a knife and lunged at the construction workers. I ran back to my cruiser and headed to, and this is the cop, intercept them. So they finally got, the cops finally tracked this guy down. Oh no, it was the workers who tracked him to, I'm sorry, I'm so stoned right now. I don't even know where I am. We're taking this roller coaster with Matt. He's processing it in real time. I love it. But anyways, they finally got the guy. Just as it served. Does it say what the company was? I guess it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Moving on. Brattleboro, a 30-year-old Vernon man. Vernon? I guess it's near Brattleboro, I assume. Anyone have any Vernon insights? Have we been there? Maybe. Vernon, Florida was a documentary. I remember Vernon, Florida. I knew a girl from Vernon, Florida. Oh my god. What's that about? A town in Florida called Vernon. Yeah, but what's the, uh? It's a very small town. It's kind of like out in the, like it's a swamp people. My buddy married a woman from Vernon. And? They are no longer together. And as a result, he lived with me for three months. Oh, haha, okay. Oh man, that sounds familiar. Anyway, Vernon, Vermont, different place, probably not swamp people. This guy's held without bail, accused of punching a person in the face and kicking and punching them when they were on the ground. So this guy just sounds like a dirty fighter. It's like a, I don't know, it's like very specific, like, it's not just like he had a fight. It's like, why are they, anyway, it's a level of detail, it doesn't make any sense. No, he was... In other words, he can't say he was defending himself. Yeah. I mean, when you go that far, I don't think you are. Well... You know, you're just maybe just, you know... You don't know who threw the first punch. Okay. Yeah, it was... The fight was almost like something out of Hollywood, you know? There was a roundhouse kick and a spinning back fist. Well, during the altercation, the complainant was thrown onto a coffee table, which shattered. How many times you see that in real life? I've never seen it. They could shatter ours because it's an old trunk. Our coffee table doesn't exist. Maybe it's a glass. See, there's always a culprit and this time it was me. Yeah. So maybe the coffee table is just like an old glass piece of crap, I guess. Could be a wooden piece of crap. Right. Right. It's made of like a wicker. One of those 16 candles. Glass one. Um, thrown to a coffee table, hit the alleged victim in the head with the handle of a knife. That is a level of restraint. Right. You don't see that a lot nowadays. If you're going to use a knife, use the other end. We're giving different advice. So I was gonna say, like, use the handle, like, don't go to jail. But okay, but I like how they found this guy. So they saw a vehicle leaving the scene, they pulled him over. He, they turned on their lights. He sped off, colliding with another vehicle on Canal Street. Oh, that's always good. Roadblock. And when he was waiting for EMS to arrive, He said, I was trying to run because I just got in a fight. So he actually said, I just committed a crime. So I wanted you guys not to catch me. It's like, okay, well, that's kind of how that goes. Thank you, sir. So now they got this guy. He's been charged with first degree aggravated domestic assault, domestic assault, burglary into an occupied dwelling, unlawful mischief, gross, negligent operation in attempting to elude an officer. Whenever I hear that gross, negligent, I'm like, yeah, why can't they just get arrested for just being gross? Gross, comma. This guy's got an odor about him. Alright, Glo, finally, please start investigating a substance left inside an Enosburg mailbox. Okay, so, I'm sorry, it's Enosburg? Is this spelling wrong? Is there an H on the end of Enosburg? It didn't used to be I don't know, I swear, I don't think it was That used to be without the H Do they have a vote over there at Enosburg? There's a referendum up there You need an H Hold on, I think that this is a... Oh man, I don't know Holy shit. Um, okay. Interesting. Town of Enosburg website has an H. Google Maps, no H. Okay, Wikipedia has an H. Enosburg Falls, no H. Wow. What the hell is going on with this H? We need to investigate that. Where's the H? What'd you guys do with the H? Well, why does Enosburg Falls not get an H? Are these different Enosburgs? I assume they're near each other. Am I wrong? Probably, yeah. All right, damn. All right, so Glow in Enosburg, Vermont. Authorities are investigating an unknown substance found in an Enosburg residence mailbox. He said, or I guess she said, the person went to retrieve their mail. The substance blew into their face. Do you open your mailbox and something blows in your face? Where's the wind coming from? Strong gusts coming from the mailbox. Is it like pressurized? Like, it blows up? The state hazmat response team was called in and determined the substance found inside and on top of the mailbox was not hazardous. There's got to be another story here. I'm sorry, I don't think I said this person said that it caused a nosebleed to them. But there's got to be another story here. What's really going on? Why does somebody leave something they don't even say? What is it? It looks like a bunch of pollen or chalk dust or something. They don't say what it is. They say what it isn't. Right? It's not hazardous. Not hazardous, but... And do you think it really causes this person a nosebleed, or are they just a, uh... Maybe they're allergic to whatever it is, right? Right. I mean, like, is it a bunch of peanut dust? Like, it's not hazardous unless you're having an allergy. I don't know, man. It's crazy. Good questions. WCX is always letting us down. Alright, last story. New York man sentenced for smuggling snakes across the border in his pants. What border? The border. The Canadian border? Oh, okay. He's down south. New Hampshire? Boy, he can't bring those Burmese pythons to New Hampshire. This man had three snakes in his pants. So, were they sedated or something? How did they keep him from being bit? Well, he kept them in bags. Yeah, that was interesting. Don't they suffocate? Um, maybe holes in the bag? Holes in the bag? How small, I mean, how big were these snakes? I mean, the Burmese python, I mean, I don't ever think of them as being tiny, but maybe they're baby Burmese pythons? Could be. Hmm, doesn't say, huh? No. Do you think that's a good international flirt to say, I have a baby Burmese python in my pants? Want to look? So, yeah, he had them concealed in bags attached to his inner thigh. Can you hear those? I don't know. You put a baggie between your legs and... How are you walking? Yeah. Are you walking like, kinda like, are you waddling? You have to be. Yeah. Did he have a fat suit on? A fat suit, I don't know. Probably not. They're not native to North America and are considered an invasive species. Of course. That's what the Everglades is all about now. One year probation and a $5,000 fine, that's it. That's it? I don't know, is that too much? Is that enough? I have no idea. I'm just trying to process it. Snake smuggler? Snake smuggler. A little harsh. What's your trade, sir? Snake smuggler. How many times does this guy do it successfully? Right. Before this guy. And is he doing it again? Right, right. You know, he's doing something. What do you even get for three Burmese pythons in Canada? Like, are they prized? I have so many questions. I mean, yeah. Can't people buy those things in this country? In pest stores? Well, he's coming from Canada. Wait, wait, where is he coming from? He's coming from Canada and the United States. Oh, I don't think so. I think he's coming from New York to Canada. Oh, was he? I don't know. Let me, um... The Champlain Port of Entry in 2018. That was a long time ago. Customs and Borders Authorities... to the attorney's office for Northern New York. So maybe he was coming down, yeah, he was coming down. Imagine that's your weekend. We're doing this weekend, old Calvin Bautista, going to visit some friends in Toronto. All right, see you on Monday. This guy goes up, he's got to meet a snake dealer. He's got a snake guy. He's got a snake guy. He'll get bags, he's taping them. He's Sunday morning. He's taping bags of snakes to his inner thigh. He's looking in the mirror thinking about his daughter who's back home like She's struggling with dyslexia, and he's like I wish I could help her, but I gotta pay for this private tutor I gotta get this snake money Really, how much money can you make? I don't know. It's gonna be a side job. What is it Burmese Python cost? This up on old Google shopping Is I'm gonna probably get flagged for this. I think I saw one in the that Food store that animal food store that we visited in Florida a few times They had the turtles and they had snakes and all that. I think that one of them was a Burmese Are you all ready to get out of here? Yep. Yep. All right. Peace. Bye. Bye life on earth as we know it will itself will be slow we hope that becomes a fact if it necessarily becomes a reality however only the president will have the access to this button this button is the most dangerous button in the world you mean this button? oh i'm sorry

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Happy International Flirting Week

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Harvey Weinstein - Tribunal of Glo

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Valentine’s day bandit

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Burlington election will include ranked-choice voting

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The Fight for Decker Towers

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Back in the Womb