A Nurse First

Endless June

• Sigma Nursing • Season 6 • Episode 4

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Riley Horner’s life froze on 11 June 2019, after a concussion left her memory resetting every two hours. She defied the odds through resilience and family support, reclaiming her future as a nurse and proving recovery is possible even when time feels stuck.


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On June 11th, 2019, I was at an event that was with all of my friends and we were getting ready to go to, it was kind of like a barn dance. I was just 16 and I walked into the dance and I remember the very last thing I remember, I was looking for a drink, a song came on and all of my friends were like, let's go, let's go talk, let's go mingle. That was my last memory. on the outside of every like the big dance crowd. I had hurt my knee and so I was kind of standing off a little bit but I still was talking to people and everyone says that this guy came out of nowhere and just got completely thrown on me. He was crowd surfing and then everything else that I'm going to say is I've read my mom kept a really detailed Facebook page for me and I've reread and reread all of that. They said that I ended up completely going on the ground and they could tell that there was something wrong with me. One of my friends said that you just kind of looked completely out of it. They took me to the side, they went and found some of the adults to come and kind of check me out. And then I guess I started having a seizure. An ambulance came and I went to the hospital and I think I had another seizure. And somehow I ended up leaving the hospital on crutches. I'm not really sure how that happened. And then my mom, we went back to the hotel and we got all of my stuff and then we were heading home. And then I guess I started having a seizure in the back of the car on my way to home. And then I had another one. And so then I went to the emergency department and I had a few more that night. And that's when they're like, man, she. there's something wrong with her. And then when I finally came to, I think my mom said it was a few days later, I was completely out of it. And I thought I should still be at the dance. Like, why am I not at the dance? Where am I? What happened? And then I guess it just couldn't, throughout the day, it just wait, what happened? I was constantly asking, wait, what happened? Wait, what happened? And it didn't end. It just continued to go. And then that's when all the doctors and everyone was like, it's okay. It's a concussion. This is normal post-concussion syndrome. It will go away. They just told my mom, go home and try to get to a bigger city. And they recommended Iowa. They initially said, I've never seen this, but it was a pretty bad concussion. They were saying like it was close to like a TBI. And so they're like, these symptoms are severe, but with... her accident, kind of makes sense. And so at the beginning, where my family was like, okay, that's fair. And they sent me home for a month. And I just never got better. At the very beginning, my mom and dad sat down with my school district and they kind of created a plan. They froze my GPA, so I was going to class, but I was just going through the motions. I appreciate that my school continued to let me go and show up and kind of wander around to give me some normalcy. They created a concussion protocol where they would like split up my test into they would teach me something or I would look over notes and then I would go and answer a question. It kind of got a little weird when it started snowing because I still thought it was summer and I going to school every day was also kind of challenging because I thought it was the beginning of summer but during like the main time frame I was going to all different types of hospitals. They kept telling my mom, give it a week. she just has a concussion, it's okay. give it two more weeks, maybe six weeks. And my family just kept going back and back and back and they're like, she's wandering around. She has no idea where she's at. There's something wrong. Eventually, one of the hospitals told my family, If she hits the six month mark and she's still like this, she's never coming out of it. You should look into putting her into like a home. And that's kind of where my mom went, oh no, this is not happening. And that's when she started reaching out to all these hospitals. From June 2019 to about December 2019, there's not a single personal memory of mine that I created. My mom likes to describe it as like Swiss cheese. She's like, there's a lot of holes, but there is stuff there. I have stories and I have pictures and I can put the stories to the pictures, but I was never in that moment. It is such a weird sensation. I just can't even explain how weird it is besides, it's like watching a movie about your life. from someone else. I've also explained it to people like it's an autobiography, but someone else wrote it. It's like your life told from someone else's point of view. So my like first memory, I remember being in the Utah hospital. That's ultimately where I went for about two weeks. The people at Cognitive FX changed my life. I would not be here without them. They never gave up on me. Dr. Fong, she's the reason why I'm here. She's the reason why I'm going to be able to continue living on my life. I'm so thankful that I finally found someone that listens to me and takes my concerns pretty matter of fact. And I think that's also a reason why I've been doing a lot better in school. Once I got to college, my freshman year, I was kind of taking more advanced classes in high school, so my beginning of college, I basically had already taken all those classes my freshman and sophomore year of high school where I was completely a-okay. I kind of had more less of a photographic memory before my accident and all those classes that I took my freshman and sophomore year of high school, I only got through it because I had just taken those classes in high school in my mind. And then the same thing for the second semester. Once I got to sophomore year, that's when I realized I was having so many problems in school because everything was new. I was still struggling so much. That was a challenge in itself. Learning how to re-study at the very beginning of nursing school failed my very first nursing test and they told me You're just not cut out for this. need to, you need to change. And I was like, nope, nope, I'm not doing that. I'm going to find a way to prove you wrong. I am going to get this nursing degree. I've never wanted anything more in my life. I had to change my ways of studying. I had to change my ways of how I did school. I needed this certain grade on my final and I really didn't think that I was going to get it. So I basically taught myself an entire semester's worth of nursing content in two classes, along with my other classes in like about two weeks. That's when I knew I was like, I'm remembering this and I can do this. I was bawling my eyes out once I got that grade back. I hadn't ordered my white coat. I hadn't done anything because everyone's telling me I can't do this. There was 40 minutes left of the window period to order my white coat. and I got my grade back and I called my mom and like every one, we were all crying and I ordered it and I just like, I still get chills because it was just like a moment where I proved to myself, like I just hadn't ever proved to myself that I could do it. I think I kind of gave up on myself there for a little bit just because everything I felt was against me, but I got through it and I got into the Sigma Theta Tau Nursing Honor Society. And I knew about that way, way back before I even started nursing school. When I got the email, I remember the exact day I was going home for like winter break or something. And I knew the email was supposed to be sent out. I would check my email every single day. And I finally got that email. I think it was like 430 in the morning. And I started bawling. I was so, so excited. That was something that I've always worked towards. And it was just like, okay, you did that. You can do anything. I wanted to be inducted so, so bad. And then once it finally came, my whole family came and I was so excited. I was nervous. I just had all these little butterflies in my stomach. I was so excited. It's like what I envision me walking across the stage for graduation. It was like my pre-graduation. It was kind of a milestone in my life. was like, oh, you made it. You can do this. You have one year left. That's nothing. You got inducted. That's a hard thing. So that was just, I was like, okay, you're not behind. You're right where you're supposed to be. Your hard work is finally starting to pay off. And it was a huge milestone that I met. And I'm just very proud of it. If I didn't come back, I would have been a 16 year old girl for the rest of my life. You never know what could be your last memory. What do you want to make sure, like, what do you want to be remembered for? And so I just, in my life, I just kind of step back. I'm like, okay, what is important to me? And what do I want to do with that? And so that's kind of also pushed me into really wanting to pursue nursing in like the medical field and I just kind of I know what it's been like on the patient side I was the patient for so long. I draw my strength from my mom I also wouldn't be here without her she fought for me like from day one she just had this motherly instinct that something was really wrong and she never gave up. I'm not just proud of myself for all these accomplishments I am. that she's the reason that I got there. And so she's always just been my number one supporter. She's always been there and she always will be there. I'm not just graduating for myself, I'm graduating for my mom too.