Having Hope With Leah Vis

Leah Vis is married to her high school best friend, and they have four children. Their ages range from three years old to twelve. Their family homeschools and their favorite part of that is reading together with tea and chocolate.

Leah is also a children's book author and photographer. Her children's books are Our Heaven Baby and Little Lu the Dreamer (with more Little Lu books on the way).


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Connect with Leah

Website - www.leahvisauthor.com

Instagram - leahvis_author

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/LeahVisAuthor

T12 Collective Community
A faith-based community group supporting women journeying through grief and loss.

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Transcript

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Nicole Clark: 0:05

Hey, what's up you guys? Welcome to another episode of shining light with Nicole. I'm Nicole, and I'm so glad that you're here. So October is pregnancy and infant loss Awareness Month. And this month we are sharing stories of hope. This week's guest is Leah Vis. She's an author and has a beautiful ministry. And she is sharing her story on loss. And hope. Here's my conversation with Leah Vis. Welcome to season three. Leah, welcome to the podcast.

Leah Vis: 0:49

Thank you.

Nicole Clark: 0:51

You guys. I'm laughing because I you know me, I'm just so I'm super transparent. I just want you to know, we're like getting into recording and I'm just calling this sweet, sweet lady the wrong name, like three times already. So we had to start over. So this is like, take two. That's why we're like, Oh, geez, here we go. What what is going to do today. So Leah, Hi. Welcome to the podcast.

Leah Vis: 1:15

Thank you. It's so good to be here.

Nicole Clark: 1:18

I am so glad that you're here today. It's taken us a little bit to connect. But you guys, Leah is amazing. She really is just like a talent. loves the Lord loves her family. And actually, we have never met before just kind of connected, maybe via Instagram, or you know, through email. And just I'm really honored that that you're just on the show today. So thank you so much.

Leah Vis: 1:46

Thank you. I'm honored to.

Nicole Clark: 1:49

So you guys, we are talking about just having hope. You know, it's kind of a really just odd scenario and just in our culture right now, and just what we're living through. And you know, we all need a little bit of hope. So, Leah, I'm going to read a couple of Bible verses, and then we'll go from there. Yeah. So Hebrews 10:23 says, Let us hold on to the confession of our hope without wavering, since he who promised is faithful, and Psalms 71:14. But I will hope continually, and will praise you more and more. And the last one,

Romans 8: 2:33

24. Now in this hope we were saved, but hope that is seen as not hope, because who hopes for what he sees? Yeah, all about hope. So Leah, I would just love to jump in to your story. So can you tell everyone a little bit about you and your sweet family?

Leah Vis: 2:56

Yeah, so my husband and I have been married for 16 years. And we have known each other since we were 10. So that's fun. And right now we have four children. And we have four children on earth side and three in heaven. And that's part of my story with miscarriages and stuff. But we're also homeschool family, and I just try to learn and have fun and have a wonder filled life. And so we're doing our best over here.

Nicole Clark: 3:35

That's awesome. So, so awesome. So what does what does hope just mean to you?

Leah Vis: 3:41

Yeah, I mean, for me, I, how God built me is to always want hope, you know, I think we're all a little bit different. We all have different slants toward different things, you know, like, some are really good at empathy. Some are really good at hope some are really good at justice and, and then we all work together. And we're a good team, you know, and for me, he made me someone that just needs that is pursuing hope a lot. And so I just think of Romans 828. When I think of hope that he can make anything good and he does make anything and everything good. And if we can just keep remembering that and keep standing on that. And he's going to do it. Even if it takes time. Everything that happens, whether it's an accident, a mistake from the enemy, just part of being an unnatural fallen world like any of that he's gonna take it and make it good. And I think that's kind of that's why we can have hope and and hope is so important. Because if We have hope we don't have to fear because we know that he can make anything, he will make it all good for His glory and for our blessing too. So that's so powerful.

Nicole Clark: 5:14

That is, I love all of that in Romans 8:28. That's one of my absolute favorite verses in promises that I just hold on to. So what you just shared just was so, so beautiful. Thank you. And Leah. So I, you talked about earlier that you do have a story, you know, about just loss and miscarriage, and I would love for you just to share that, you know, with our listeners.

Leah Vis: 5:40

Yeah, I would love to. Um, it's funny, because looking back on it, because you know, that was a season, and that I've already been through. And so I can look back and see what God did. And now I just stand in awe of it. And so I'm happy to share. So backing up, this is the first loss because we lost three babies. It happened about eight years ago. And we already had two children. And we knew that we had always planned, we wanted like four or five kids. I don't know where we got that number, but we did want that many. So after two we're like, yeah, okay, let's wait, you know, year and a half, and then we'll try again. And so we did and we got pregnant. And 12 weeks into that pregnancy, I started bleeding. And I had no other friends who had had bleeding during pregnancy. And it actually turned out okay, so I didn't know is this just like a little bump in the road? Is this something serious? I really didn't know. But I was praying and asking God to protect me and heal me and, and I, a lot of me had faith that everything is gonna be fine. And I'm also somebody me was scared, because I didn't know what was going on. And so it was a weekend that I kind of wasn't sure whether it was bad, or just a little bump in the road. And in that weekend, I had a dream. And dreams ended up being a really important thing for me in this whole season. Um, but I had a dream that weekend. And in the dream, I was in hospital bed. And at the foot of my bed was my husband and a friend from college. And over their faces, I saw a picture of an eagle. And in the dream, I knew that that Eagle meant that I we needed to fight for something. And that was about it. I woke up, I knew that the dream was significant, but I really didn't know what it meant. And so keep going through the weekend. By the end of the weekend. It became very clear that yes, we had lost the baby. And so then it just starts this process of what just happened. Like I had never even lost someone through death and I definitely definitely never been through a miscarriage before but I haven't hadn't lost anyone close to me through death either. So I didn't have any grid and understand this through and and yeah, miscarriages just such a strange feeling of you know, like being sucker punched kind of like you have he just didn't see it coming in. And maybe that's how all like sudden death feels. But we were we really struggled and we're hurting and felt I felt so empty. And I remember just feeling like I kept feeling like my heart was trying to find a place to rest and like, feel like oh, okay, I guess it's okay, but it couldn't find that place. Like that's what it felt like during that time. And so we we ended up we were before we had found out the baby had passed away we we had already planned that my husband and I were going to go away. So even after this happened, we thought well maybe it would be good to get away anyway. So we go away for a few days and the whole time really is spent processing, losing this baby and the heart ache and did a lot of praying and talking and journaling and one thing I wanted to do is name the baby. And and I remembered that dream and the dream was so important to me so they know what it meant. But I knew that in my dream that that that Eagle was important. So I wanted a name that meant Eagle. So I got on my phone and googled like names that in Eagle I found the name Adler? And then I thought, Okay, well, maybe that could be the middle name what God was the first name. And I asked him, and the first thing that came to my mind was Jason. And so I looked up the name Jason and Jason means healer. And right when I read that, I, again, I felt like sucker punched because I'm like, God, you didn't heal me, like, What? Why? Why healer, you know, but the more I brought it to him, and process it with along with that, ego, meaning to fight for something, I felt like God was giving me a message, and he was telling me to fight for healing. And that really underscored the whole season of losses for me. And so after that, we wait a few months, and we're gonna try again. And, and I'm thinking, you know, lots of people experience miscarriages, maybe, you know, that's what happened to me. And now I'm gonna get pregnant again, and we'll be fine. And I also in between was reading lots of books, I would my faith was sky high, I knew nothing could happen to me, like I had all the verses and all the things to believe in. I just knew I was gonna be fine. And so we go into our second pregnancy. And I'm eight weeks I start bleeding again. And I, that I feel okay, like, I'm, again, like I said, I'd read all the books, I have full faith. And as like, we're gonna be fine. I had people praying for me, still didn't know. Maybe it's just normal bleeding, and not like a miscarriage. So. And then in that week, I bled for a week. And in that week, some ladies from my church came over and they're praying for me, just trying to cure God's heart. For me, and what did God have to say, and one of them, they're like, saying, you know, I feel like God's saying, and this and that, and listen, that about the baby, they're saying such neat things about the baby, and I thought, this, this is going to be just fine. Because God's telling them all these wonderful things about the baby. So this baby is going to live. And, um, you know, we get through the end of that week, and again, it becomes very clear that we, that we were going through a miscarriage, and we lost the baby. So, um, after that, those those same ladies came back and pray for me again, you know, trying to support me, and, and again, praying and listening to God. And one of the lady says, I this is not make sense. I don't, I don't know what you can just like, pray about this. I don't know. It doesn't make sense. But I feel like God saying you didn't lose the baby. And she's right. It didn't make sense, cuz I knew I did. And I wasn't thinking that she was trying to say, I didn't have a miscarriage. But, but when she said that, for some reason, it really settled into my heart. And I was like, Yes, that's true. And it didn't make sense yet. But I was like, Uh huh. Right. And I'm like, it just resonated. And then like, a week later, as praying, and thinking things through with God, and it hit me what I think he was saying through that, and I felt like he was saying, and kind of like, you know, when a baby is conceived, God has all these plans and purposes for the baby on earth. And then, you know, when the person dies, they go to heaven, they're, you know, they've made it to the finish line there with Jesus now, like, you know, maybe they have a new purpose in heaven, but really, like, they don't need their earthly plans and purposes anymore. And I felt like God was saying, those purposes, those earthly purposes that I had for that baby, I'm holding those safe for you. And you still get to have those. And I didn't know if he was saying, like, I'll put those on your, I'll give those purposes to your kids on earth that you already have. Or I'm going to give them to your next baby, or I'm going to spread them out onto everybody. But somehow he was telling me that he was keeping those purposes safe. And I still got to see those purposes happen on the earth while my my baby gets to go like, enjoy heaven. Jesus, so Oh, yeah, so that was really neat. And it was very comforting and powerful to me. Um, so then we go on, and we're determined we're gonna have a baby so we get pregnant again, and this time I'm the opposite of my last pregnancy. I have no faith. I have no energy. To be strong, and believe I've just kind of like, letting everyone carry me through this, like, I will let them pray for me, I will let them be strong and let them believe and I just had nothing left. But so we, we get to we get to 12 weeks, and you hear the baby's heartbeat and the finally tell the kids and and then that 16 weeks, just a routine appointment, the nurse can't find the baby's heartbeat, and they bring the doctor in and, and certainly do an ultrasound. And sure enough, the baby had died. And this time, I mean, each time felt so different. This time I was angry, I would got in my car and just screamed, and I just couldn't believe it. I was like how God, how can I trust you? How can I believe anything you've ever said, Oh my goodness, I believe I've had like 1,000,000% faith so many times throughout this. And I'm I was just irate. And my we text some people to tell them and my pastor asked if he can come over the next morning to pray with us and stuff. And I was like, Yes, come over, because I have tons of questions. And I want answers. Like, I'm the kind of person that I don't want to just be listened to, like, I want answers. And so when he's gonna come over, like, that's what I wanted, I want I want to tell him everything that I on my accusations against God, and I wanted him Tell me, like what you thought about it. And so he comes over and I'm, I'm like, cry yelling, all my anger toward God. And how can I trust that again? How can I believe ABS ever said, and just tons and tons of questions. And my pastor said, you know, now's not the time for those questions. Like you can ask those questions later. But right now those questions are just gonna lead you down a downward spiral. He said that he and his wife used to live in Australia. And he said, everyone in Australia knows that. If you go out into the bush, like out into the wilderness, and you get lost, that you don't try to find your way out, you sit down where you are, and you wait, and you wait to be found. Um, and he was really just giving me that counsel to not try to find my way out right now. But just to sit down and let God find me. It was so cool. Because earlier that morning, I literally journaled to God, I felt so lost, and I needed him to come find me. So for him, for the my pastor to say that it was directly to me. And so I did that I, in my heart, I just sat down and waited for God to find me. And, you know, my pastor prayed, he prayed that he would have peace, and I had a supernatural peace come over me. I went from intensely angry to so much peace, that it my friends would call me, you know, that night, the next day, and I would almost feel like I needed to pretend to be sad because the piece was so tangible on me. And it's not like after that I never was sad again. But that anger was gone. It had lifted and thankful for that. Um, so after he probably came over again with his wife, because his wife was on vacation, right when it happened, but like maybe a week or two later, they came over again. And he said that he had a dream. And he had a dream that Jesus was coming up to me and handed me a baby and said that the baby's name was Josiah. And my pastor said, I'm not saying that he's gonna give you a baby boy, I'm not saying that you need to name him Josiah. But I just think it's significant. I think you should pray about the dream. And so I did. But the first thing I did was I looked at the name Josiah. And the name Josiah means Jehovah has healed. Yeah, and so a little bit later, after that I had a gene to tells you there's lots of dreams in this season for me. I had a dream that I was preparing a horse and lots of people around me watching me and I knew in the dream I knew what I was doing. Really important. And I knew that nobody could help me, they could just like, support me. But I had to do it. And when I woke up is kind of the same as all the other genes I knew is important, a significant dream, but didn't really know what it meant. But I did start to feel like okay, maybe like that horse signified purpose. Um, and for a while after that, I kept thinking, Okay, what is that, maybe that purpose and that this, maybe that purpose meant this and kind of didn't really get it until, you know, the very end of my season, but knew that that dream was important. So I kind of just shelved it for a little bit. Um, but then after that, after all, that I had a new fight in me, I think God put a fire in me. And I was that fire was, I will get pregnant. And I will keep this baby. God, what is the battle plan. And God told me that the battle plan was to seek Him with all my heart. And so I did I, I made it I was very intentional, to be with Him every day and to, to be with him, to love him and experience His presence and be in the word and meditate on the word. And, you know, I would pray about my thoughts about having a baby too. But it wasn't all about that, like, I was really trying to pursue him, to love them and use them. And then during that time, you know, from that time until the next time we got pregnant, you know, it was really that battle plan of seeking Him with all my heart. And I really looking back, I know that he was leaving me every step of the way. When I was in the midst of that time, I felt like I was trying anything and everything I could think of like I was doing all the natural things I could think of I went to an infertility doctor, we were having people pray, like literally everything I could think of we were doing. So it kind of seemed like, Oh, I'm just trying everything. But looking back, I know, he was leading me through this maze. Um, and so like I said, we did go to an infertility doctor, and she tested everything. And, um, she said the only thing she could that was maybe the problem is she said, maybe you have this thing where your, your ovaries are acting older than they are, and you're putting out like, bad eggs. And she's like, but that doesn't explain the second trimester loss. But, um, you know, maybe that's what's happening. So she's like, pretty much you need to get going right away, because you're, you know, if your ovaries are acting old, and you're only getting older, so, um, get going right away. And so I was like, Okay, I guess that's what we'll do. And then that night, I had a dream, again, and this time, the dream was very clear to me what it meant I was driving a car, and I ran three red lights. When I woke up, I knew God was telling me slow down, like, I'm gonna lead you through this. You don't have like, doctors are good, but like, I'm gonna, I'm gonna lead you through this one. So no, you don't have to get started right away, slow down. And I I interpreted the three lights to mean three months. So we decided to wait three months, and really just work on strengthening my body and my heart and, and all that stuff. So, um, yeah, during that time, you know, like I said, I was pursuing God, more than I ever had before. And it was just a sweet time. So sweet with him. He was speaking to me in all different kinds of ways and through people and dreams. And people were sharing things that they felt like God was telling them for me, and a lot of them had a lot of the same symbolism, which was just me even if I didn't know what it meant. I just felt like God's fingerprint because it's all the same stuff. Um, so yeah, then we got pregnant again after three months, and I was so scared, because I obviously don't have a problem getting pregnant, but I was having a big problem staying pregnant. And so this is the scary part once I was pregnant, and so man, I was just like, crazy scared. A lot of this pregnancy and there'll be so many times where I would just be begging God, God, please speak to me via today's show me somehow that everything's gonna be fine. Like, I will take it. I would take it anyway. Like, you can show me a Bible verse. You can show me on a billboard. You can show me through a song. Anything I'll take it and he did. He He was so loving and kind To answer that plea for reassurance, and a lot of it was through my kids. So one time, we didn't tell our kids that we were pregnant. We were going to wait a long time, we lost the last baby at 16 weeks. And so we were going to wait for sure until 16 weeks to tell them and so on. We weren't, we didn't tell them at all. I was driving the car with my kids in the back in the van and we had a we have a screen, they can watch movies back there. And my kids didn't watch. They don't watch that much. So when they do, they're like glued to the screen. They're like, show comas, like you nothing distracts them from the show. So they're watching the show. I'm driving along and I'm, I'm struggling that day, like stressful. I fear begging God to speak to me. And my son. He says, Man, I think Jesus just said something to me. And I was like, What did you say? He's like, I don't know. And I was like, ask him again. And so he's quiet for a little bit. And he's like, Mom, you're gonna have a baby. And I was like, Oh, my goodness. That's amazing. But I'm not gonna say anything to him. Like, yeah, you're right. I just held it in my heart and didn't confirm or anything. And he went back to show coma. And then, um, another time? Um, oh, no. Yeah. So another time I was is a similar thing. I was really scared. And I said, we're sitting on a couch together. And I was like, body, plus, listen to Jesus and see if he has anything to tell mommy. Like, I didn't tell him. I was scared. I didn't tell him anything else. I just like, let's see if Jesus has anything to say. And he puts his head in his hands and Muslims. And he looks at the baby. Again, I was like, didn't say anything. I was just like, well, cool. Buddy thinks and left it at that. Um, and then another time. I was, it was morning time. And I was coming up. I was like waking up. And the first thing that I, my first thought, in my mind was 10 lines surrounding you. And I was like, God, is that you talking? If it is you? Is that good? Is that bad? Like, I don't really know what that is like, Can you just confirm that? Show me what that is? Is that you? So was that mean? And then that night, we put our kids to bed, and then we're hanging out up front. And then my son comes forward. And he's like, Mom, Jesus told me to shut my eyes. So I shut my eyes. And I saw a lion. And there was arrows going into the sky, and he had arrows painted on his face. And I know it like still didn't like totally make sense. But it is confirming to me. Anyway, I was thinking, Okay, God saying, I felt like using Yes, this is me talking and, and to me, the arrows painted on the lions face meant like a warrior lion. So I just felt like, protected, you know. And another really cool thing that God did is we went up to visit my aunt and uncle in Washington. And we're still in the first trimester. So super scared. Um, and so we ended up sharing with them. So literally, nobody knows about our pregnancy, except for my husband and I, and maybe like, a few close friends, but like, my family doesn't know, our kids don't know. But my aunt and uncle, um, were there and I just felt like, you know, I think it's the right time to tell them and I knew they were big prayer warriors. So I told them, we told him my whole story. We told him that very pregnant, very scared and, and I like, you know what, let's go at church on Sunday. That's, let's get, we'll get our friends together. And we'll pray for you. So the Yes, for sure. So we were at church that Sunday, and their friends are praying for me. And I'm a crying mess. And one of the friends says to me, you know, I noticed that this really doesn't make sense. I don't know what this means. But I see an egg. And God says it's a good egg. And, I mean, she is there's no way she could know what that meant. But, you know, if you think back to when the infertility doctor said like, you're putting out bad eggs, like just get started right away and then God says now like, it's a good egg. just super sweet things like that during that pregnancy, I'm not telling it's I'm not saying that they took away on my fear. But it's like looking back on it now. I'm just like, man, thank you. That was so sweet. It was just like powerful to look back on. And so we had her That was great. I mean, other than the fear is a great pregnancy. And she's almost six years old now. And then I shouldn't have fast forward to my, my daughter, my last daughter's birth, because that kind of just ties up the whole story. And so she is three years old right now. And so everything turned out fine. But when she was born, um, she wasn't, she was born, she wasn't breathing. She wasn't crying, she wasn't breathing, nothing she wasn't. And the midwives are rubbing her back trying to get her to respond, and, and I'm just too tired to like, worry, I think I raise adrenaline, or maybe it was God, I don't know. But I wasn't really afraid. But I did just say, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, as they're trying to get her to respond. And pretty soon, it took about two minutes. And then they got her to respond. And so I'm, you know, holding a baby and join the baby. And later the midwife says, did you want to talk about what happened? And I was like, No, No, I'm fine. Like the baby sign, like, no big deal. But then, like, That night, I started thinking about it. Think about the midwife said, thinking about what happened. And then like, wait, why sad, okay. Like, was she getting oxygen to her brain? Like, Yes, she's like, with me right now. But was it? Did that affect your brain? Like, is that gonna cause problems later? Like, what? What did happen? And I just got gripped with fear, and sadness, and just, man, it's hard to explain, but I, I just really started to struggle. And, um, I, I always, when I talk to people, like I said, I like to, like, get answers, and I want people to make me feel better. So I would like to tell people and I would want them to respond with reassurance, but when I would tell them, they say, Oh, you know, it is like making that worse. And I just came more and more fearful and more and more sad and scared. And eventually, and I talked to my midwife about it, and she would reassure me, and she was like, Oh, it's fine. Like the baby's umbilical cord is attached, she's getting oxygenated blood is fine. And it just wasn't working like I nothing satisfying me. I was still so scared. I'd ask the other midwife, I asked the midwife again. And at this point, I could tell she was kind of getting like, sick of it. So I had a six week appointment scheduled down the line, and I thought, you know what, I am going to stop asking them anyway, I'm going to stop talking to anybody about it. Even my husband, I'm not, I'm not even going to journal about it. Nothing. I'm not going to breathe a word about this until my six week appointment. If God doesn't give me peace by then, then I'll bring it up again. But until then, like, I'm gonna see like what God will do so that night, I, I just lay on my pillow. And I, I just felt like a physical handing over like, God, here are all the things I'm really scared about this, this, this, this and this, and I just handed it to him. Not necessarily in surrender, but more like a, okay, what do you what do you have, like, tell me, tell me what you what, whatever I need to know, tell me now. And then I just hand it over to him. And then that night, in between being awake and asleep, which is kind of hard to explain. I, God gave me a picture. And he gave me like a few words. So that next morning, I woke up and wrote it down. And I wasn't really like. It didn't make me completely but feel better. And I didn't really understand them either. But it did meet give me a little bit more peace. So I thought, well, maybe I'll understand these eventually. And this happened for four more nights in a row where he would give me a couple words or a picture and I just kept writing them down the next day, assuming that it would eventually make sense to me, but I was feeling like a little bit better each time. Um, but one of the pictures that he gave me was a picture of the profile of three running horses. And right away, I knew what that meant, and it just was like it. It really tied up. Everything is headed the whole story. So, thinking back to that one dream that I had about the horse, which ever since then I thought, Oh, yeah, like, okay, maybe that just meant that horses mean purpose or whatever. And then remembering what that lady said about, Oh, you didn't lose the baby. And then God told me and keeping that baby's purpose safe. You know, and then this picture of three running horses and I'm like, right away, I knew, that's three purposes. That's my three babies that I lost. And he, I still didn't know what he's gonna do with that, like, if he's premium all on this new baby or spreading nuts, my kids or what, but I just knew that he was like, telling me like, I've got this I'm doing something I I've been doing something all along, like I'm, you know, like, it was just beautiful and powerful. Um, so that really, yeah, tied up that season for me. And I look back now and I'm, am in awe of what he did. And during it, had tons of sadness had tough times of anger, times of confusion, times of like, disappointment and despair and jealousy and all those things. But he, he still used it all. He brought me closer to him through it. And, and now looking back, I get to see what he did. And, um, yeah, I just like I have, I just want people to know, that they can have hope. And every story is no different. You know, but I feel like, I feel like the answer to every problem is to draw close to God to seek Him with all of our heart and he's gonna, he's gonna do what he's gonna do. He's gonna bring us through the maze. And when we're done with it all, we'll look back and be like, wow, look what he did. You know?

Nicole Clark: 37:10

That story, just crazy. Good, crazy inspiring. The I was taking notes because I was like, Okay, wait a second. She's like, you know, speaking to my heart right now. Just, I mean, one year dreams, like, that was so beautiful that the Lord just was like, he was so sweet to you, just like in your dreams. And then when you talked about having a battle plan, I think a lot of times, like when we're going through something like we don't, we don't consider that. You know, we're just like, Just get me out. Just get me out of this. But I love the way that you put that that you're like, hey, I've got a rally. I have got to get a battle plan. Going, you know? Yeah, through this. And so cool when he talked about that you were doing all of these things, but but he was bringing you through a maze that Leah that's big. That's, I just love that so much. And then just like your power of prayer, I mean, what what what a testimony to, to so many things. Thank you for sharing that.

Leah Vis: 38:14

Wow, you're welcome.

Nicole Clark: 38:17

I loved it. And I feel like this is like perfect time to just jump right into your ministry. I would love for you just to share about your beautiful books. And just you know how, again, you are just reminding families and women and kids just that they are not alone. And they can have hope.

Leah Vis: 38:36

Wow, thank you. I mean, like I said before, I I think hope is so powerful. And I really, it's it's hope is the thing, is the piece that I have to give to the kingdom, you know, like some people are really good. Like I said, that empathy, and that's what they're going to give to the kingdom. And some people are good at justice. And that's what they're going to give to the kingdom. But I have a lot of hope. And I just I want people to know that. Even if they do want to grieve in a different way that even during the grieving you can have hope. And yeah, like, there's never there's never a situation that's too bad for God to transform and to use for His glory and for a good and so yeah, with my books I have that I have a book. That is our story about miscarriage. It's a children's book. So it's nice and simple. And the reason I wrote it is because after our third miscarriage, we had to tell the kids and the way we told them is we just were very honest. We said the baby has died, and the babies in heaven with Jesus and we said what do you think heaven is like? And so they knew that baby had died, but we come in with it. Straight into God's word, what is the baby experiencing right now. And our kids went wild, dreaming about heaven, and they were super pumped about it. And it brought a lot of peace to us, too. And so I wrote that story. It's called our Heaven, baby. And it It's a story of a brother and sister who find out that their mommy is having a baby, or mommy and daddy are having a baby, and they're so excited. And then they find out that the baby has died, and is in heaven. And then they start to dream. What is heaven? Like? I bet it's like this, I bet it's like this, and they just go wild in their dreaming. And so it's a hopeful book. And I wanted families to have that because when I I mean, not just with miscarriage, when I've struggled with lots of things. When I think about heaven, and dream about heaven, it brings me to a different place. And I when I think about heaven, I feel like I can get through anything. And I really think that's true for all of us. Like if we can really focus on it, because I it's really hard for us to get our minds around the the fact that Earth is the intro. And Heaven is the real thing. That's so hard for us, like even even though I I believe it's right now with all my heart, it's still hard for me to get my mind around. But when I am like, purposefully, reading about heading or purposely like thinking and talking about it, it brings me there. And so I want that for people to that, to just like dream about heaven and dwell on it there. So that's what I wanted. For people with that book.

Nicole Clark: 41:51

This that's just so special to me. I'm like, I love that love that. We have. Thank you so much for being on the show today. Can you please tell everybody where they can find you just like on your socials or online?

Leah Vis: 42:04

Yeah, so my website is Leah Vis author.com. And then my Instagram is Leah, Vis underscore author. And then Facebook, you can find me Leah, Vis author and speaker. So those are the good places to find me.

Nicole Clark: 42:27

Awesome, we will absolutely include those, you know, socials and everything in the show notes. And so I have your final two because this podcast is all about Matthew

5: 42:38

16 and letting your light shine for the kingdom. And I truly believe that God just uses our story to change the world. And so how did your puzzle pieces lead you to where you are today?

Leah Vis: 42:52

Um, yeah, I think like I said, I think you know, how is doing it until you're like, out of it. And you're like, Oh, I like what he did. But when you're in the middle, you're like, What is going on? Like, what am I doing? So I love that he is in control. And we don't have to think like, this puzzle piece fits with this puzzle piece. And let me bring this one over here and this one over here. But like he's doing it the whole time. So I just see, like how he did that in that miscarriage season. And then. And then like, I love how he's done that with various seasons of my life, you know, even the one I'm in currently. And I think, Wow, like, look how he prepared me for this, like 15 years ago. And so I just love that he's in total control. And he's doing it, you know, he's a puzzle piece mover. And I think for that.

Nicole Clark: 43:50

Absolutely. And I just think that you do such an amazing job at shining bright and not hiding your light for the kingdom. Have you always been that way? And what can you share with us just to encourage us and help us?

Leah Vis: 44:06

So, yeah, like I told you before, I think God has wired me for hope. Like he's wired, other people for other things. And I think I just have to be myself, you know, be myself in every situation. And sometimes I'm good at that. And sometimes I'm not. I'm really good at it with my Christian Brothers and sisters, but I'm not always like really good at being myself spiritually with people who are not like me. So that's when I'm doing my best is when I'm just being myself, no matter who it is, you know, and I think that's the case for all of us. Right? Like he made us. I think we we underestimate the power of exactly who we are, you know, because we think like it's so normal, because it's us, but when we're being Definitely who he wants us to be like, we're being powerful and everyone else around us says, Wow, that's so easy look at you and you're just like, I'm just being myself. You know? So,

Nicole Clark: 45:11

so good. So encouraging. I'm really just honestly so inspired by you and just thank you for coming on the show and sharing today.

Leah Vis: 45:19

Yeah, thank you so much.