Coach Alex Ray: Hello my unicorns.
Coach Alex Ray: How are you doing today?
Coach Alex Ray: Happy episode 100.
Coach Alex Ray: Today, as a celebration, I am delighted to share with you my best tool for anxiety, and this tool is actually something that requires a guide to lead you through it.
Coach Alex Ray: So today is really an audio guide, and you're going to be able to use this any time you're feeling anxious.
Coach Alex Ray: If you're not feeling anxious right now, you may not find this tremendously helpful.
Coach Alex Ray: It can be useful, but this is something that you're going to want to have saved for any time that you are experiencing intense anxiety.
Coach Alex Ray: And this has been on my mind recently because I've been going through some intense anxiety stuff.
Coach Alex Ray: In the next solo episode, I'll share with you more details on what happened for me recently and how I worked through it, but in this episode, I really want to share with you an actual tool that I lead my clients through frequently whenever they're experiencing heightened anxiety, and I realized that I really wanted a place where anyone could come and do this at any time.
Coach Alex Ray: If you feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders, I can totally relate, and this episode, this practice of connection, is going to be extremely helpful for you in processing how you feel in working through that anxiety and coming out the other side with more understanding, more compassion for yourself and, hopefully, some relief.
Coach Alex Ray: Now I want to recommend that, as you do this, as you listen to me guide you through this practice don't focus on feeling relaxed or calm.
Coach Alex Ray: Those often are really nice byproducts of this work, but they aren't the main focus.
Coach Alex Ray: The main focus is connection.
Coach Alex Ray: Also, this episode is to be done while you have space and time to just focus and be present with your emotions.
Coach Alex Ray: So do not use this episode while driving or operating any heavy machinery and don't use this episode while taking a walk.
Coach Alex Ray: I want you to have space to just sit or lay and be present with this.
Coach Alex Ray: It's going to require you to focus and it may bring up some very uncomfortable emotions.
Coach Alex Ray: So feel free to grab a tissue box, get into a comfortable position and a comfortable space and once you're there, we'll begin.
Coach Alex Ray: Go ahead and start by closing your eyes with me and then we'll direct our attention to your breath.
Coach Alex Ray: You don't need to change it in any way yet.
Coach Alex Ray: Just let it be as it is.
Coach Alex Ray: On your next inhale, make that breath a little deeper and as you exhale, make an audible sound releasing tension.
Coach Alex Ray: Three more, just like that.
Coach Alex Ray: One more.
Coach Alex Ray: Let your breath return to normal.
Coach Alex Ray: Now let's begin with a slow scan, starting at your toes and working your way up to your head, or you may already be aware of where you're feeling the sensations of anxiety in your body, and in that case you can go directly there when you've found the sensations.
Coach Alex Ray: There may be multiple sources or there may be one.
Coach Alex Ray: Just be with them.
Coach Alex Ray: We're going to ask these sensations a few questions, and feel free to answer out loud.
Coach Alex Ray: Is there any shape to the sensation?
Coach Alex Ray: Is there any color to the sensation?
Coach Alex Ray: Is there any texture?
Coach Alex Ray: Is there any movement to the sensation?
Coach Alex Ray: Does the sensation have any temperature?
Coach Alex Ray: How heavy or light is the sensation?
Coach Alex Ray: Is there any recognizable material to the sensation?
Coach Alex Ray: Now that you've got a clearer connection to the sensations you're experiencing, let's imagine they have a voice of their own.
Coach Alex Ray: That sensation can talk back to you.
Coach Alex Ray: Go ahead and ask it.
Coach Alex Ray: What is its purpose?
Coach Alex Ray: What does the sensation want to communicate to you?
Coach Alex Ray: Is that what the sensation is telling you, or is that a story that you have about the sensation?
Coach Alex Ray: How do you feel about the sensation?
Coach Alex Ray: It's different now versus 10 minutes ago.
Coach Alex Ray: What lesson are you taking away from this?
Coach Alex Ray: What reminders do you need to give yourself?
Coach Alex Ray: Next time you're anxious, go ahead and think the sensations, appreciate them and, if you're willing, commit to valuing the sensations and not ignoring them in the future.
Coach Alex Ray: When you feel ready, take three deep breaths With each exhale, make it audible and when you're finished you can open your eyes.
Coach Alex Ray: Well done, I'm proud of you.
Coach Alex Ray: I know that was difficult and I have people cry with me frequently when we do that exercise.
Coach Alex Ray: So thank you for taking this time for yourself and for trusting me to take you to this uncomfortable place.
Coach Alex Ray: I want to remind you this right here was you practicing all the steps of confidence.
Coach Alex Ray: You don't remember what they are.
Coach Alex Ray: Go back and listen to the first three episodes of the podcast.
Coach Alex Ray: Remember that step one is be willing to be uncomfortable, and you did that today by showing up and listening to this audio guide.
Coach Alex Ray: Step two is take action, and you did that.
Coach Alex Ray: You're willing to be uncomfortable.
Coach Alex Ray: You took action by going through with this and feeling these sensations as uncomfortable as they were.
Coach Alex Ray: And step three was to have your own back, and what that looks like here is just being kind to yourself, no matter what that experience was like, knowing that that experience was exactly what you needed in this moment.
Coach Alex Ray: It's going to look different for each and every one of you, so please be kind with yourself.
Coach Alex Ray: There was no right way to do this.
Coach Alex Ray: There was no wrong way to do this.
Coach Alex Ray: If there was a right way, the only right way was just to show up and connect with your sensations.
Coach Alex Ray: You've done it.
Coach Alex Ray: I'm really proud of you.
Coach Alex Ray: You can save this episode for later.
Coach Alex Ray: Use it at any time that you feel extremely anxious, especially when you're feeling like your heart is racing, or feeling heaviness in your chest or a lump in your throat or weight on your shoulders, tension in your back, any number of things.
Coach Alex Ray: If you're feeling anxious, pull this episode out, go through it again and connect with the sensations.
Coach Alex Ray: So often we try to avoid and disconnect from them, and that's not actually what helps us and it actually also harms our confidence in the long run, because the more you avoid feeling a sensation, the more you reinforce the belief that the sensation is scary and that you have to avoid it and you have to do something else.
Coach Alex Ray: You have to escape, but you don't.
Coach Alex Ray: You didn't have to escape today.
Coach Alex Ray: You were here, you were with it, and so you can have confidence in yourself in the future that you can go through this again and you will be okay.
Coach Alex Ray: And a reminder as always, if you found this episode useful, please share it with a friend.
Coach Alex Ray: There's so many more in our community that need these helpful tools, and if you enjoyed this tool and you want more I've got plenty more where that came from Come work with me one on one.
Coach Alex Ray: We can use this process and take it even deeper than we did today, and I've also got plenty of other tools to help you manage your stress and anxiety and boost your confidence.
Coach Alex Ray: Use the link down in the show notes to book your session.
Coach Alex Ray: Have a fantastic week, unicorns, and I'll see you next Tuesday.