Enjoy the Moment - Because When It's Gone, It's Gone Forever

In this week's episode, I discuss the story of my time spent in three different cities. What did I do? Well, instead of enjoying the cities to the fullest, I was constantly focused on the wrong things.

The lesson I learned is to enjoy the moment for what it is, not focus on what it isn't.  

The advice that I would give myself is that the more I give meaning to meaningless things, the more joy of life I am missing out on.

Sponsor I Wish I Had:
Govee 
@goveeofficial
Amazon affiliate link:
 https://amzn.to/4aEJ9e2


Just the Tip:
How to make simple syrup

Whisper In
@splitrockcustomhomes

Check out this related video:   
https://youtu.be/nb-mEnRXpmM?si=P9bKg5Lbe8Wnbv29

Check out the Story. Lesson. Advice. Podcast here: https://www.buzzsprout.com/919333/142... 

Have a topic suggestion for the show? Email me at saturdayisdadurday@gmail.com 

Music by Purple-planet.com Music by Wondershare Filmora 12 

Transcript

Welcome to the definition of chasing your own tail.
Everyone welcome into another episode of The Story lesson advice podcast. Part of Saturday is Saturday media, podcast, video series blogs and books all in due time, Sid media.net is where you can have access to everything. And at Saturday is Saturday media is the YouTube and Instagram handle. Thanks for listening. We'll dive right into it. I said, this is the definition of chasing your own tail. I made some notes here and a little segment I like to call reading for the story. In the summer of 2005, pre my wife and pre our daughter and all of that when I was the young and single version of myself that summer was really stood out to me. And it stood out to me for a while a couple of reasons. One of the reasons is I was finally in a job where I was making enough money to have my own apartment, and I had friends and it was great. And I had fun every night. But one of the reasons it sticks out to me is that looking back, I was always looking for something better. During that summer, I was going out for five nights a week, which in Green Bay is considered light, that's light duty. And I was trying to outdo the night before and not just trying to get drunker than the night before. But whatever experience I had whatever positive I had that night, whether it was just maybe meeting a friend at a bar and watching a basketball game and having a few beers, I was trying to capture that feeling and more every single day after that, and then I'd get to the next fun moment. And I was trying to relive and recapture that magic, and grow that exponentially every single time. And, you know, I would date a girl and in my head, I was like, Hey, this is exactly kind of what I was looking for at the time again, I was in my mid 20s. And it's like no, it's not because I want more I want something else so that if that moment wasn't as good as what I wanted, or what was previously then I was trying to chase the next thing. And I skipped out on my friends a lot of times because I was chasing the next thing. I had fun with him one time, but then there was a shiny new object over here, and the potential promise of a better night. And I would leave my really good friends behind and I would go do something else with someone else because that's what I was chasing. So in the middle of all of that I moved from Green Bay, Wisconsin to Chicago. And that really changed the dynamic for me because I went from having, you know, my circle of friends and I knew everything I knew everywhere to go, I knew all the bars, I knew all the bartenders I knew all of that to moving to Chicago, which I absolutely love, just still my favorite city. But I didn't know anybody. And in my head my way to circumvent that or combat that was I was so focused on really wanting to get like a cool apartment, like a really nice apartment ended up getting one way, way more of an apartment that I needed. And it was north of the city. I was in Evanston, which is a good 15 miles north of downtown Chicago and 15 miles in Chicago is you know, basically a day trip. So it was a long way a long, long ways away from Chicago, but I thought somehow that me having a cool apartment would sort of manifest friends and and women and wow, Justin, you're so cool. And all of this or whatever I thought in my head. No, all it did really was leave me alone most of the time. 15 miles north of the city. And again, one of the best cities of the country, great food, great sports. In the summertime, you cannot ask for a better city with things to do the beach on Lakeshore drive festivals every other day outdoor concerts all the time. And I was focused on trying to create the cool guy with cool apartment kind of thing that I put myself out of pocket for a lot of that stuff. And I missed out on a lot of things number one cuz I couldn't afford a lot of stuff now. And number two, because I was so far north that I just was was kind of out of the orbit of of, you know, friends calling me and or texting me or whatever because I was so far that like I you know, he's not gonna be able to make it because it's a 40 minute train ride. And I miss so many so many good things. So then bear with me, I moved to Dallas. And guess what I had a roommate. Cool. I knew some people that I moved with with our company. And now I went from in Green Bay trying to chase the next best thing in Chicago trying to be the cool guy with the apartment or in the car or whatever, whatever that was. And now in Dallas. I was trying to be Mr. In shape guy. So Green Bay, Chicago, and now Dallas. I'm focusing on the wrong thing, three separate things, but I kinda of the hilarity of this and how ironic this is I moved to Dallas. And I was so focused on being in shape that I routinely now skipped out on all those things that I was chasing the happy hours, the nights out with friends, the, the going to games, doing all that kind of stuff, because I was so focused on why don't want to have the extra calories. And I need to be in shape, because that's what I'm good. That's what's going to attract women to me. And that's, that's how I'm gonna get a girlfriend. And that's how I'm going to get the feeling of of belonging and, and the feeling of my ego getting boosted. And all that is I need to be in shape. And then what ended up happening is, well, it's kind of hard to have women find you attractive if you're sitting on your couch every weekend instead of going out. But I was fooling myself for a variety of reasons. But one of them was what I was doing to sabotage myself as I was putting so much pressure on myself to eat so strict all week long and workout, you know, an hour a night or more five, six days a week. And then by the time the weekend showed up, I was just on a gas, I'm starving, because I'm not having a balanced, healthy relationship with food and a healthy diet. And when I say diet, I don't mean like diet. I mean, diet isn't the food that I've been taking. And what would I do, I would I would go grab takeout and I would stuff my face and sit on the couch, and then get upset at myself because I just sabotaged a week's worth of progress. But it wasn't really progress. And then I would redouble my efforts and then rinse and repeat. And then once in a while I would go out and have drinks. But I was so focused on being wanting to be in shape. I never got there, by the way, like I was never in great shape. I never had a six pack, I never whatever. And that's fine. But I was so focused on all of the wrong things. And I missed all of those great years, I missed out on so much stuff in my mid to late 20s and early 30s When I finally had enough money to kind of do my own thing. And I finally had, you know, some wherewithal and I could go have some fun, I missed out on so many things. And it man it taught me just the most valuable lesson. Now it's time for this week's sponsor I wish I had and this week's sponsor I wish I had I can proudly say I own the product of and I also I also have a unboxing and review video coming up on my YouTube channel shortly depending on when this podcast is gets released. On the one of the products that I have from this brand, so the brand is called Go V and they are a smart home brand that is all about fun life experiences through their smart lighting and smart appliances. And I have the govi light bars, which are basically sort of foot long, tall light bars that you can set next to your TV or in your living room or wherever you want. And they just have a variety of colors, you can connect to an app that they have. And you can sync these light bars and a variety of their lighting products. With music or with movies, you can change the color of it. You can have multiple colors going. You can have all these really cool different effects. And my daughter absolutely loves the light bars. We set it to like music and we'll have a dance party and do all that. So yes, I want you to stop and think drink it in of me having a dance party. Just stop and enjoy that moment. You're welcome. But they have a ton of really, really cool stuff. And they've got indoor light bars like I have, they've got TV lights, smart bulbs for lamps, they've got outdoor lights, ceiling and wall lights. They've got smart appliances like space heaters and water sensors and humidifiers. They've got holiday decor, really cool stuff. So if you're looking to add some fun to inside or outside, if you have kids and you kind of want to spice up you know the TV area or any kind of room of your house or kitchen, anywhere where you kind of want to set some ambiance with with lightning, I really recommend checking out go V they have a ton of products, and they are awesome. Their website is u s.go. V g o v e.com. This week's sponsor I wish I had.
So if you are patient enough to sit through my rambling of my story of me living in Green Bay in Chicago and Dallas, and me constantly focusing on the wrong thing, the lesson that maybe you can take away from this that I certainly learned was enjoy the moment because it'll never happen again. And I have a tiny little mini story with this. Four or five years ago, my wife and I were at one of our good friends houses. And there was a group of people around and we were just kind of hanging out and having drinks and and just kind of having a low key night and somebody had the idea of like, connect to their phone to an Alexa speaker or whatever. And they started playing a song and then somebody else passed they passed the phone around to somebody and somebody else played a random song. And we just sort of did that like kind of around the horn a couple of times. And we spent like, three, four hours doing that everybody was playing all these, you know, random songs that meant something to them. And every time a song came on, everybody's like, Oh, that's great, and whatever. So I remember that night. And I remember thinking like, this was such a fun time, I remember being there, and everybody's laughing. And I can, I can kind of visualize it now. And that was one of the first times in a long time that I remember and said, Okay, I'm just enjoying the moment. And I'm not thinking about anything else, I'm not going to try to recapture this down the road. I'm just enjoying the moment. But I missed so many moments that I could have enjoyed in my mid 20s, when I lived in those different cities, because I was so focused on something else, as opposed to just enjoying that moment for what it is, I think about kind of what a slap in the face that is to my friends that were with me, and all the things that we're trying to do. And, you know, the idea of me kind of being there, but not really being there. It's just I think, is really disheartening as, as one of my friends to have to, you know, realize that, Hey, Justin is kind of here, but he's focused on something else, or whatever. But the idea that once those moments are gone, they're never coming back. And as parents, you can attest to that, right? As you're watching kids get older, it's like, man, that's where did that time go? I think it's so important for us as adults, to realize, and have that lesson of enjoying the moment and be present in the moment. You know, I'm never get back. That feeling of sitting on a rooftop patio in downtown Chicago, overlooking the river on like a beautiful spring day, with my friends, drinking a beer and just no responsibility, right? It's It's Saturday, early afternoon, I don't even have to be back to work till Monday, like I have no responsibility other than just living. But there I am focused on something else, or being in Dallas and just living in such a cool fun city, as a young as a young adult, single, and, you know, out there on the patio with all the misters on my friends watching the game or whatever. And those moments are gone. And I was there and I'm ordering, you know, Michelob Ultra because I'm so focused on the calories and eating a salad instead of just having a hamburger and enjoying myself. And then I'm going home and eating food because I'm starving. It's like I just had such an imbalance with that. So I challenge anybody listening, whatever your situation is like that. Wherever you are missing out on enjoying the moment, just take a beat and step back and recognize that lesson of once that moment is gone. It's over. Oh. All right. And now it's time for this week's just the tip. And since we're rolling into springtime here, this is going to be a nice little tip if you are going to be making any kind of cocktails, or any fun specialty drinks. Over the course of the spring and summer, I'm going to talk to you real quickly about how to make your own simple syrup. Now you can buy simple syrup pretty cheap at basically any grocery store. And they even have them that are flavored. If you can't find them in the regular part of the grocery store, you should be able to find them if there's a liquor store attached to the grocery store or something like that. But to make one at home, it's super simple. It is equal parts, water and granulated sugar. That's important not powdered sugar, it's granulated sugar, so equal parts water and granulated sugar. What you're going to do is carefully bring this to a boil. And then once it gets to a boil, you're going to turn it down to a simmer and just let it simmer for 1015 minutes. And that's it. Once you do that, the sugar will be dissolved in the water, it'll be one just kind of a thicker liquid and let it cool down. And then you can pour it into a container whether it's a squeeze bottle, or some mason jar or something like that, and it will hold in the refrigerator for about a week. I can't remember if it shelf stable or not. But for sure, just put it in the refrigerator and you're good to go for about a week. Now to spice things up. If you want to add something like cinnamon sticks and or berries or fresh herbs or anything like that jalapenos, you can do that. Just experiment a little bit with how you want to do that. Ratio wise because it can be pretty intense if you're not careful. I urge you that when you boil water in sugar to be very careful. Make sure there's no kids around or anything like that because if that gets on your skin, that is not good. So nothing to be afraid of. Just be cautious about that. Simple syrup, equal parts water granulated sugar, bring to a boil, reduce it down to a simmer, let it cook for 1015 minutes, let it cool. And Bob's your uncle that is this week's just the tip. Okay, so I gave you the story of me, always focusing on the wrong things no matter where I lived and what part of my life I was in. I gave you the lesson of enjoying the moment because once it's gone, it's gone, and it ain't never coming back. And the advice I would give is a couple fold. One connects to the lesson of be present, when and where you are present. So if you are at your kids soccer game, be there, enjoy it, immerse yourself, if you are out with friends, be there, go all in fully commit, give yourself 100% to that situation, if you're talking to your spouse, same thing, don't be looking at your phone or looking at the TV in the background, focus, eye contact and commit. So another piece of advice that I would give myself if I could go back is that if I continue to give meaning, to meaningless things, I am constantly going to be missing out on the joy of life. And I think some of us have a tendency to dream up and kind of romanticize things in our head of going into something what we want it to be, and we're kind of expecting this giant crescendo of an experience when we go see a movie or when we go out with our friends or whatever that is going to be just the greatest thing in the world. And I think for me, I was always kind of looking for that like that pop of awesomeness with whatever I was doing. And that's not how things work, like, you're your pop of awesomeness isn't, isn't the norm isn't the rule. That's the exception, just like if you invest, right? If you invest over the long haul, your gains are incremental, it's just your inch warming along and then maybe you get a pop when the economy does well. But that's it's just sort of an inchworm process. And same thing with experiencing things is if you continue to give meaning to meaningless things, if you continue to focus on what things are not instead of what they are. And if you continue to look for the greatest version of whatever it is, you're going to miss out on just a really fun time, or a really good experience or a really good conversation. Because there's, it's the little moments, it's the little incremental things that make you come away with a sense of, of feeling sustained, I have a tendency to have expectations on things, or put pressure on myself for things to play out a certain way. Or for me to feel like I need to do certain things in order to kind of force a certain type of experience. And just being there and enjoying it for what it is and not having an expectation is going to drastically improve your life. And usually, the expectation is a result of some form of your ego. And when you can understand that and recognize in yourself and when I now can recognize that in myself. And I kind of pump the brakes on that and put a little distance between my expectation which is usually derived from my ego, wanting something to be a certain way. And I can just pause that and just enjoy whatever it is or experience whatever it is for whatever it is, then that's usually where I get over that little hump. And now I'm just able to just exist, and I don't have this mental tug of war. I don't have this frustration. I don't have this irritation, because I'm just enjoying the experience or being a part of the experience for whatever it is. And that can translate to work and family and whatever sports life anything.
All right. And now it's time for this week's whisper in and this week's whispering as an Instagram account that I've been following for several months. And they are a custom homebuilder located in the state of Utah. And the name of the company is Split Rock custom homes. They are a great account to follow for design inspiration. Or if you happen to be in their building area, I would highly consider them for your next belt. I think they have really thoughtful and unique constructions that showcase just beautiful transitions from the indoor to the outdoor living spaces to working out hidden rooms behind bookshelves. Just all the cool things. Plus I think they're really practical and innovative in how they use space in the kitchen and the bathroom in the bedroom. They are awesome. Their Instagram account is at Split Rock custom homes. Again, they are a custom home builder in Utah. Meticulously crafted, personalize process, indoor and outdoor harmony. This week's whisper in Split Rock Custom Homes
So the title of this episode is enjoy the moment. And that is kind of what I've been talking about the entire time. And I would challenge anybody that's listening to this to think about the next time you're in a situation, are you enjoying the moment? Are you experiencing the experience? Or are you thinking about what it is not? Or what you could be doing? Or are you insecure about something, whatever that case is, and that happens to all of us. Obviously, it happened to me, the advice that I would give myself and that I would give to you, any of my friends is please do everything in your power to recognize that and then allow yourself to move past that move through it and move past it. So you can just enjoy the moment for the moment. Because like I said, once it's gone, it's gone. The sponsor for this week's episode, the sponsor I wish I had is the Gove is go via their smart home brand all cool things with with lights and appliances. Give them a look. Check out their Instagram account, check out their website us.go v.com Really cool options to to kind of fun up and spice up lighting in and out of your house. The just the tip segment was about how to make a simple syrup equal parts water and granulated sugar boil simmer, and away you go. Add some fun stuff like cinnamon sticks or jalapenos, if you want to make it flavorful. The Whispering was Split Rock custom homes, their Instagram account that I've been following for several months. They're a custom homebuilder out of Utah, just spectacular spectacular homes. Really cool for design inspiration. If you're in the area where they build in, I would definitely look at them as a home builder. Really cool stuff, everything you could possibly imagine in a house. So thank you so much for listening to this week's episode. If you are enjoying these, please share the episode, share the podcast with your friends with other people consider leaving a review consider leaving a comment and this this will be moving to two times a month. Now as I fold in another podcast I hate reading. And I fold in two more video series three video series that I hate reading the video component of the podcast which is very video driven. And then the unboxing review videos where I unbox and review products I actually own to give you guys some some help with making better purchasing decisions. And then also a culinary video series coming very soon as well. So thank you so much for listening to the story lessons advice podcast part of Saturday is Saturday media Sid media dotnet and at Saturday is Saturday media for the YouTube and Instagram handle. We'll see you next time. Thanks