SPEAKER_00: And this first one we're going to take a look at.
SPEAKER_00: The very first one in a very real and desperate place.
SPEAKER_00: You think you would want to start with, like, let's gear ourselves up for this journey.
SPEAKER_00: Instead, it's like, no, we were going to name where we are right now, and it's not a great place.
SPEAKER_00: So fascinating.
SPEAKER_00: The first songs don't begin with celebration.
SPEAKER_00: They're they begin in distress.
SPEAKER_00: So I'm gonna go ahead and read the entire psalm here, seven verses, and then we'll go ahead and look at it.
SPEAKER_00: This is the very first one that we're taking a look at.
SPEAKER_00: It starts with saying, I call on the Lord, and in my and this is again, as we sing this, imagine this being stung corporately altogether.
SPEAKER_00: Actually, you know what?
SPEAKER_00: Why don't we read it all together?
SPEAKER_00: Let's get that.
SPEAKER_00: Let's get up with that.
SPEAKER_00: That's great.
SPEAKER_00: One, two, three.
SPEAKER_00: I call on the Lord in my distress, and he answers me.
SPEAKER_00: Save me, Lord, from my lips and deceitful tongues.
SPEAKER_00: What he will do to you, and what more besides you, deceitful tongue?
SPEAKER_00: He will punish you with the warrior's sharp arrows with the burning coals of the broombrush.
SPEAKER_00: Amen.
SPEAKER_00: Right?
SPEAKER_00: Look at this.
SPEAKER_00: Woe to me that I dwell in the shack, that I live among the tents of Qadar.
SPEAKER_00: Too long have I lived among those who hate peace.
SPEAKER_00: I am for peace, but when I speak, they are for war.
SPEAKER_00: Praise Jesus.
SPEAKER_00: You know, it's so interesting as we look at this song.
SPEAKER_00: We see from the very beginning that this song that's sung begins with crying out to God.
SPEAKER_00: It says, I call in the Lord in my distress, and he answers me.
SPEAKER_00: You know, I think many times when we have a feeling that we want to begin to walk towards the Lord, we want to get close to God, that we need to start from a really good place.
SPEAKER_00: You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_00: It's like if I'm gonna go ahead and move towards God if I'm feeling distant, I want to make sure I start my journey off well.
SPEAKER_00: We need things to calm down first, to get my emotions under control.
SPEAKER_00: I need to clean myself up.
SPEAKER_00: I've said it before that many times I'll talk to people, it's like, well, I can't go to church.
SPEAKER_00: I gotta get I gotta get my life under control before I come to church.
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, that's the exact opposite of what it should be.
SPEAKER_00: Like the church is where we should have the most broken, most burning people.
SPEAKER_00: Because that's what happens is we begin to move towards God.
SPEAKER_00: Even that idea of distress.
SPEAKER_00: When I think of distress, I think of like, you know, those distressed genes or like those distressed clothes, um, where like just like rubbed down or or just like shaken about, jostled and just beat up.
SPEAKER_00: You distress clothing.
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes it just life just feels like, man, you get beat up thinking of the kings, right?
SPEAKER_00: Just even right now, like everything going on with Timo and everything going on with just that family.
SPEAKER_00: Like talk about distressing.
SPEAKER_00: I think about times when you're just trying to hold everything together, but it's just right underneath your face, and there's just can't just it feels like I can't hold back just the angst.
SPEAKER_00: I love here that the psalmist he doesn't try to pretend to have it go away.
SPEAKER_00: Doesn't say I shouldn't feel this way, or a faithful person wouldn't struggle like this.
SPEAKER_00: We're gonna see some amazing, amazingly powerful worship in the next couple of weeks as we dive down in these passages.
SPEAKER_00: But it starts from a place of simplicity, and it starts from a place of just angst.
SPEAKER_00: I think it's important that the first step on our road towards God doesn't need to start with pretending that everything's fine.
SPEAKER_00: The first step is prayer, not a polished prayer, an impressive prayer where you have all the right words.
SPEAKER_00: This prayer isn't complicated.
SPEAKER_00: There are some prayers that are long and thought out, some prayers that are just honest, some prayers where you're just at the end of yourself and there's nothing else left to say.
SPEAKER_00: I've shared this story before, but the most powerful prayer I've ever heard in my life, it was 20 years ago when I was doing street ministry when I was in Bible college, and we would just go out to uh pray for uh those who were homeless and just kind of those left on the margins of society.
SPEAKER_00: And there was a young guy named Ziggy who uh became uh a Christian and gave his life to the Lord, and he said, Hey, can you pray for me?
SPEAKER_00: And we circled up and I said, You know, before you pray for you, Ziggy, why don't you pray for yourself?
SPEAKER_00: And he said, I never prayed before, let alone out loud.
SPEAKER_00: I said, Well, just go ahead and start.
SPEAKER_00: And literally the prayer was, Lord, I just pray that you just clean up my effing life.
SPEAKER_00: He did not say the effing, he said something else.
SPEAKER_00: And I remember in that moment, it's a little j it's a little uh sudden to hear that in a prayer.
SPEAKER_00: But I remember this is a guy who's never prayed in his life, didn't really even know the words to say, but what he was just that how meaningful that prayer was, and how powerful that prayer was in that moment.
SPEAKER_00: It was just so real in that moment.
SPEAKER_00: Psalm 120 is that kind of prayer in my distress, in my angst.
SPEAKER_00: It's okay to pray confused.
SPEAKER_00: If you're confused, that's how you should pray.
SPEAKER_00: If you're angry, that's how you should pray.
SPEAKER_00: If you're confused, if you're frustrated, if you're disappointed, if you're joyful, if you're elated, however it is you feel, that is the place that you we pray from.
SPEAKER_00: And then we get to this other verse here that's very subtle, but I love it.
SPEAKER_00: It's just I call on the Lord in my dispress in my distress, and he answers me.
SPEAKER_00: Now we notice, because we've read the entire rest of the verse here, that God answers him, but it doesn't mean that the problems immediately go away.
SPEAKER_00: We see that he calls and the Lord answers, but that's just the beginning of hope.
SPEAKER_00: It's not that I call upon the Lord and my life is instantly fixed.
SPEAKER_00: But it's a good reminder that God isn't far away from our trouble.
SPEAKER_00: And this is the best place to begin in our prayers.
SPEAKER_00: The exact place where the road starts.
SPEAKER_00: I heard the phrase that the longest journey begins with the first single step.
SPEAKER_00: And many times it's so daunting to feel like, how can I repair this breakdown of relationship between me and the Lord?
SPEAKER_00: And the longest journey just begins with that.
SPEAKER_00: However, you're feeling, you come to the Lord.
SPEAKER_00: The start of the journey often begins with us, just simply stop pretending and just being.
SPEAKER_00: Well, the next thing that we see in Psalm 120 is that the road requires, the road to God requires us telling the truth.
SPEAKER_00: We see in the next verses it says, Save me, Lord, from lying lips and deceitful tongues.
SPEAKER_00: So now we find out what this distress is related to, right?
SPEAKER_00: When we start off, we don't know why the psalmist is angry or frustrated.
SPEAKER_00: Well, now we know exactly what it is.
SPEAKER_00: It's connected to words and deceit and lies, falsehoods, people saying things that are not true.
SPEAKER_00: It's so amazing to me how powerful the word, the tongue is, and how powerful words are.
SPEAKER_00: I mean, isn't that true?
SPEAKER_00: You can be in the worst circumstance of your life, but if people around you are speaking life into your situation, it's amazing how far that goes.
SPEAKER_00: And you could be in the most beautiful place on earth and the best place ever, but if those lies and those words are coming against you, how horrible it could be.
SPEAKER_00: I've been at many different jobs, you know, over my professional career, maybe not many, but several different jobs.
SPEAKER_00: And I'll tell you what, the jobs that I've had the worst time that I've hated the most is when I've had bosses and people who have not spoken life over me, but have just spoken out negatively.
SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm talking about?
SPEAKER_00: If you don't have one of those bosses, unfortunately you're that boss.
SPEAKER_00: So like there's just something about words and how powerful they are.
SPEAKER_00: Scripture says that it's like the tongue is like staring a ship.
SPEAKER_00: You have a massive ship with a little tiny rudder.
SPEAKER_00: You have a little tiny rudder that moves the entire vessel.
SPEAKER_00: So the tongue does the same thing.
SPEAKER_00: The deepest wounds, I think, some of the deepest wounds are through words.
SPEAKER_00: Anyone ever remember you have a deep wound from something that somebody said to you once?
SPEAKER_00: Some word that was spoken to you, that you just carry, I still have those wounds.
SPEAKER_00: And many times the most hurtful words that are spoken against you are the thoughts that you already think or feel about yourself.
SPEAKER_00: If somebody comes up to me and just says, Oh man, you're such a shorty, look how short you are.
SPEAKER_00: I'm not gonna be that offended.
SPEAKER_00: Because I'm like, I don't think I'm that short.
SPEAKER_00: But it's the words that have the element of truth or true those words that are that you believe about yourself that are the most painful.
SPEAKER_00: I think it's important as we look at it.
SPEAKER_00: I mean, this idea about lying lips and deceitful tongues, I mean, look in our society, I think that it's all around people who lie, people just this hostility that we live in.
SPEAKER_00: Kind of these half-truths and things where we can just become comfortable there.
SPEAKER_00: And while that's important, and while I think it's true that many times people say things about us to us, or everything else that are hurtful, I think many times, as I said, the most hurtful words are the words and the lies that we begin to believe about ourselves.
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes it's much easier to call out the lies that other people are saying, but it's hard for us to call out our own hearts about the lies that we are telling about ourselves.
SPEAKER_00: Pat had a great example this morning.
SPEAKER_00: He talked about his testimony.
SPEAKER_00: Talked about what an amazingly powerful testimony, so encouraging to me.
SPEAKER_00: He's one of the many people at our church that whenever I begin to get discouraged as a pastor or whatever else, I begin to think of people like Pat, people like you, and I begin to think about his story, and it encourages me.
SPEAKER_00: And one of the most destructive things that the enemy would love to do is to take that and to somehow lessen it.
SPEAKER_00: But the deceitful tongue isn't always somebody else's voice.
SPEAKER_00: Many times it's our voice, it's us making agreements with that in our own head.
SPEAKER_00: There are the lies that we hear, but then there's also the lies that we come into agreement with.
SPEAKER_00: And those aren't always the same thing, because there are many things that we do here that we could just choose to reject.
SPEAKER_00: What are some of the agreements that you have come, those lies that you have come into agreement in your life?
SPEAKER_00: What are some of the deceitful things that have either been spoken to you or you have spoken over yourself?
SPEAKER_00: You know, I'm just too broken.
SPEAKER_00: I am always going to be this way.
SPEAKER_00: God is disappointed in me.
SPEAKER_00: I'm not worthy to be loved.
SPEAKER_00: In order to be truly accepted, I have to prove myself.
SPEAKER_00: If people truly knew me, nobody would want to be around me.
SPEAKER_00: What have you come into agreement with?
SPEAKER_00: The beginning of the road and the journey begins with telling the truth.
SPEAKER_00: What false name have you accepted?
SPEAKER_00: What fear have you treated like wisdom in your own heart?
SPEAKER_00: What shame have you accepted as truth?
SPEAKER_00: What have you allowed to become your identity?
SPEAKER_00: Many times when we walk towards God, we carry these things with us, and it's good from the very beginning just to say, like, Lord, save me from these lying lips.
SPEAKER_00: It doesn't, you know, what's interesting is it says save me.
SPEAKER_00: It doesn't just say, hey, inform me, Lord, just tell me the truth.
SPEAKER_00: Like, just give me the right information.
SPEAKER_00: Because somehow I feel like I do this a lot.
SPEAKER_00: I have in my head a lot, and a lot of times I have a hard time getting into my heart.
SPEAKER_00: And a lot of times I feel like, well, if I just had the right information, getting the right information will help me out of this mess.
SPEAKER_00: Once I just find out the right verse or the right thing, or if once I figure out the puzzle pieces that somehow will go, but it doesn't just say, hey, Lord, just inform me.
SPEAKER_00: Just instead, it's save me.
SPEAKER_00: It's like a hey, yeah, I can't, there's something happening that I can't seem to save myself from that.
SPEAKER_00: When we're in those moments of shame, when we're in those moments of accepting that truth, coming when we want to come out of agreement with some of those things, we need to say, hey, Lord, just save me from this.
SPEAKER_00: I know the truth, but knowing and doing and living is completely different.
SPEAKER_00: This isn't just positive thinking.
SPEAKER_00: It's not pretending everything's fine or looking into a mirror.
SPEAKER_00: If these false words can truly wound us, then God can save us.
SPEAKER_00: We believe that the Lord can heal us.
SPEAKER_00: Well, the last thing that Psalm 120 shows us is that the road begins when we realize that we can't stay there.
SPEAKER_00: This to me is my favorite part of this verse.
SPEAKER_00: Incredibly, what I think is incredibly powerful.
SPEAKER_00: It says, Woe to me that I dwell in Meshach, that I live among the tents of Kadar.
SPEAKER_00: So right here, as we read Meshach and Kadar, this is uh metaphorical language here.
SPEAKER_00: And the uh metaphor is lost on us.
SPEAKER_00: Anyone ever been to Meshech before?
SPEAKER_00: Never been to Meshach or Kadar.
SPEAKER_00: Um, this is metaphorical language.
SPEAKER_00: So this is again to be sung as God's people.
SPEAKER_00: There are many places that they would live if you look at their history, many different places.
SPEAKER_00: They never once lived at these places.
SPEAKER_00: These are actual physical locations that we know about, both from history and from the Bible.
SPEAKER_00: So these are places that they've never officially been before, but it's a it's a metaphor.
SPEAKER_00: And what both of these places represent is war.
SPEAKER_00: What both of these places represent is strong, like battles.
SPEAKER_00: Uh Meshach was above uh Israel, kind of in modern-day Turkey, and Kadar was over to the east, and these it was a tribe of like these Arab nomads that were there.
SPEAKER_00: And both of them are associated with military power and might.
SPEAKER_00: Ezekiel talks about like these hordes of warriors from Meshach.
SPEAKER_00: And even throughout history, we see this other group, the uh tents of Kadar, that they're they were like a roving kind of tribe, kind of in a similar way.
SPEAKER_00: I don't know if we have the exact phrase.
SPEAKER_00: I probably the closest that I would think of is if you think of like Spartans, right?
SPEAKER_00: You think of like this is Sparta.
SPEAKER_00: Um you know, in the movie 300, but when you think of the Spartans, they are like a warrior culture.
SPEAKER_00: And these are no, these are known as these warriors.
SPEAKER_00: And by using these metaphors here, it says that war and strife and fighting, that that is the order of the day.
SPEAKER_00: And this right here, I think is just so profound to me.
SPEAKER_00: And it's just so, it's why I love these, just the metaphor and the picture of this, because it says here, where it says, Too long I have lived among those who hate peace.
SPEAKER_00: Now we know that they've actually never lived there before, right?
SPEAKER_00: They've never lived among their places.
SPEAKER_00: What are they talking about?
SPEAKER_00: It's this profound statement.
SPEAKER_00: It's powerful because what they're saying is this too long have I lived in a place where war and strife and fighting and anger have ruled my heart.
SPEAKER_00: Too long have I been part of this culture of fighting and this culture of war when all I want is peace.
SPEAKER_00: This isn't just somebody who's singing these songs or people who are annoyed, who had a bad day.
SPEAKER_00: This is somebody who's like finally waking up to the fact that they're saying that the place that I have been is a place I no longer want to be.
SPEAKER_00: Like, where is that for you?
SPEAKER_00: You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_00: Like, where is that place?
SPEAKER_00: Like, what is your Meshach or what is your tent of Qadar?
SPEAKER_00: What is that place that you live?
SPEAKER_00: And you just stay there.
SPEAKER_00: What's that place where you're just like, too long have I lived among this place?
SPEAKER_00: I think many of us it can be shame.
SPEAKER_00: That you live in these places, you live in the tents of shame.
SPEAKER_00: Many times it's anger.
SPEAKER_00: I think I have my fair share of shame as well.
SPEAKER_00: But I spend a lot of time in an angry place.
SPEAKER_00: I love arguing, just debating.
SPEAKER_00: But one of the things I love most is debating people in my head.
SPEAKER_00: Always win.
SPEAKER_00: It's funny, you get on one of those spirals, and at the end of doing that for 20 minutes, an hour, four hours, however long, I never feel better at the end of it.
SPEAKER_00: My soul is ripped.
SPEAKER_00: Even this past week, we were on vacation.
SPEAKER_00: I hear your amen.
SPEAKER_00: I'll take it, buddy.
SPEAKER_00: Even this week, I was uh at the Oregon Coast on vacation, and there are times where I would just find myself just spiraling, getting angry about things that what am I doing with myself?
SPEAKER_00: Like I'm moving away from where I'm living in the moment on this beautiful beach with my family and niece and nephew and in-laws in this great place, and instead I'm going somewhere else.
SPEAKER_00: The psalmist is talking about too long.
SPEAKER_00: I've been surrounded by hostility, too long I've been surrounded by lies.
SPEAKER_00: Too long have I tried to make my home a place that is not truly your home.
SPEAKER_00: Have you decided to make a home for yourself somewhere that is not truly where you should be making a home at?
SPEAKER_00: And this almost always is where the journey of God begins.
SPEAKER_00: Is once we realize like those words are so powerful.
SPEAKER_00: Too long have I lived among those who hate peace.
SPEAKER_00: That is one of the most powerful phrases.
SPEAKER_00: And it kind of what I like to describe are like this holy discontent.
SPEAKER_00: You know what I mean by that?
SPEAKER_00: Where like you're in a place and you're getting uncomfortable, and you're like, I don't like it here, but not quite bad enough for me to leave.
SPEAKER_00: You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_00: It's just kind of like it's kind of like the worst place to be in.
SPEAKER_00: Like, I'm uncomfortable, but I'm not that uncomfortable.
SPEAKER_00: I can kind of make, I can kinda I'm not it's kind of like when when you're struggling, you haven't quite hit rock bottom yet.
SPEAKER_00: You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_00: Like you're kind of going on this life.
SPEAKER_00: Like, I haven't quite I can kind of continue to hold this together with some scotch tape and baling wire and figure this out.
SPEAKER_00: It's this idea, and the psalmist is finally at the place where, like, I have lived too long here and I am done.
SPEAKER_00: I am moving towards Jerusalem to worship my God.
SPEAKER_00: Too long have I lived with those who hate peace.
SPEAKER_00: I am for peace, but when I speak, they're for war.
SPEAKER_00: Holy discontent is when you, God begins to start waking you up from something, and you're like, I no longer want to be here.
SPEAKER_00: And the good news is that this is such a beautiful place to be.
SPEAKER_00: Even in the shame, a lot of the times, when we move from one place to another, we can get this idea of like, like we come out of this really dark place and we start moving, then immediately we feel this shame.
SPEAKER_00: And it's like, this is like the best spot.
SPEAKER_00: Like, praise Jesus, that we're finally in this place where like we are no longer satisfied with where we're at, but we are going to where we are going.
SPEAKER_00: When the words say, Too long have I lived, it's not failure, it's awakening.
SPEAKER_00: It's a holy awakening.
SPEAKER_00: It's realizing that that's what happens when grace opens your eyes suddenly.
SPEAKER_00: A lot of times grace doesn't always feel like comfort at first.
SPEAKER_00: Because you begin to experience that grace and you kind of have to move and you kind of have to kind of get to that point.
SPEAKER_00: But God is making you uncomfortable with the things that you used to tolerate.
SPEAKER_00: What are the things that you currently tolerate that God wants to make you uncomfortable in?
SPEAKER_00: We're going to have a chance here to pray as we end.
SPEAKER_00: And I'm going to invite you to pray that prayer.
SPEAKER_00: But I want you to be a little bit careful.
SPEAKER_00: What I mean by that is there are many times that if you're not ready to pray a prayer, it maybe it's not the best to pray it because I think that if you were to sit there and say, Lord, I want you to begin to make me uncomfortable in this place, I think he'll answer you.
SPEAKER_00: And what that means is you're going to move.
SPEAKER_00: Now you're going to go to a much better place, and you're going to go to a place that's positive and a place that is better.
SPEAKER_00: But praying that prayer can also be very puts you in a very vulnerable spot.
SPEAKER_00: Maybe some of you it's that idea of like, I used to be able to live with that resentment.
SPEAKER_00: Used to be able to live with that sin.
SPEAKER_00: I used to be able to live with that way of thinking, or used to be able to live with the shame.
SPEAKER_00: Used to be able to live with anger in my heart towards that one person.
SPEAKER_00: Or that one group of people that you've never actually even met, but just represents everything you hate in the world.
SPEAKER_00: You used to be comfortable with that.
SPEAKER_00: So as we start on this journey on the road, I think one of the most spiritual things that you could ever say is, like, I'm not okay.
SPEAKER_00: I am not fine.
SPEAKER_00: The most powerful thing you can say is, God, I have been here way too long.
SPEAKER_00: And I am ready to move.
SPEAKER_00: I think it's important for us to call on the Lord from the place of where we currently are.
SPEAKER_00: Not from the place you think you should be.
SPEAKER_00: We'll get there.
SPEAKER_00: As we walk through these road of ascent, we'll get to some of the most beautiful and powerful passages of God's presence in our lives.
SPEAKER_00: But in order to get there, we gotta move from where we've just laid up our tents in places we should never have been.
SPEAKER_00: Let's go ahead and stand as we close and pray.
SPEAKER_00: I want you to think about that.
SPEAKER_00: Think about think about that in your life.
SPEAKER_00: What is the place that you have allowed to be comfortable in?
SPEAKER_00: What is the place that you have just allowed yourself to be?
SPEAKER_00: Comfort.
SPEAKER_00: And I think many of us are in different roads.
SPEAKER_00: Some of us are already there in that place of holy discontent, and we're like, yeah, I definitely know I need to get out of here.
SPEAKER_00: And I've been trying, and this is just can put voice to that.
SPEAKER_00: But some of us, I think, I don't think I fall on that.
SPEAKER_00: I think some of it is kind of like as I'm looking and even reflecting right now, as God is doing open heart surgery in front of you all in my own heart.
SPEAKER_00: I'm even realizing, like, yeah, there'd have been places I have just been way too comfortable in.
SPEAKER_00: And I needed a little bit of holy discontent.
SPEAKER_00: Think about that and think about that just for a moment before we end prayer.
SPEAKER_00: Just in front of you, whatever that is.
SPEAKER_00: So Lord, I just pray right now for all of us.
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for the wisdom in these ancient psalms.
SPEAKER_00: Thank you that it's okay to not be okay.
SPEAKER_00: Thank you that it's okay to come from a place of confusion and desperation.
SPEAKER_00: And thank you that it's okay to recognize like I have lived in this place too long and I am ready for something else.
SPEAKER_00: Those around me are not for peace.
SPEAKER_00: They are not for shalom, that the words that whatever is going on is something that is not bringing me closer to you, but is bringing me farther away.
SPEAKER_00: I pray for every single person who put their hands out.
SPEAKER_00: I put my hands out, Lord.
SPEAKER_00: I know that there are things in my own life that I have, that I am sitting in that I should not be sitting in.
SPEAKER_00: I pray, God, for the holy discontent to come.
SPEAKER_00: And I recognize the seriousness of that prayer, and I pray that everyone here who's listening to me recognizes the seriousness of that.
SPEAKER_00: Whenever we pray to you, Lord, it's live ammunition.
SPEAKER_00: Move upon our hearts and help move us from where we were to where you want us to be.
SPEAKER_00: Help us to be uncomfortable and move us to the places of comfort.
SPEAKER_00: Help us to move away from the places that just hate peace, that hate shalom and wholeness.
SPEAKER_00: I pray that we would not be a people who live under shame.
SPEAKER_00: We would not be a people who have lived making excuses for something that is damaging to our souls.
SPEAKER_00: Something that we have lived in and too long have called normal.
SPEAKER_00: But instead, we are moving because we want you to heal us.
SPEAKER_00: We give this to you.
SPEAKER_00: In your name we pray.
SPEAKER_00: Amen.
SPEAKER_00: Well, I leave you as we go with this blessing.
SPEAKER_00: The Lord bless you and keep you.
SPEAKER_00: The Lord cause his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you.
SPEAKER_00: The Lord turn his face towards you and give you his shalom.
SPEAKER_00: God bless.