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Ask Us Anything: When Your Partner Is in Denial About Your Child’s Diagnosis
Brave Together Podcast: Support and Community for Caregiving Parents
Hello Brave Friends! This is an Ask Us Anything episode in which YOU, the listener, get to write or call in and, you guessed it, ask us anything.
In this Ask Us Anything episode, #253, we’re responding to the question many parents quietly carry:
“Hi Brave Together Podcast--What do you do when your partner is in denial about your child's needs?”
In this conversation, Jessica Patay, Susanna Peace Lovell, and Dr. Zoe Shaw explore the emotional complexity that can arise when parents process a child’s diagnosis differently.
The hosts discuss how denial is often rooted in grief, fear, overwhelm, shame, or uncertainty—not a lack of love. They talk about how one parent may be ready to seek services, ask questions, and move into action, while the other may still be struggling to accept what is happening. These different coping styles can create tension, loneliness, resentment, and conflict within a relationship.
Jessica, Susanna, and Zoe share personal insight and practical strategies for navigating this difficult dynamic with compassion and resilience. They discuss the importance of communication, empathy, timing, and curiosity over judgment. They also emphasize that support groups, therapy, family counseling, and community connection can be life-changing resources for couples feeling stuck.
The conversation also touches on cultural stigma around diagnoses, fears about labels, sibling dynamics, and the importance of advocating for a child’s needs even when parents are not on the same page. The hosts remind listeners that it is okay to have needs, ask for help, and seek support for yourself while your partner works through their own process.
This episode is a powerful reminder that parents do not have to process things at the same pace to still move forward together.
Keep the questions coming—we’re here to support you. Whether you’re parenting a child with complex medical, developmental, or mental health needs, or supporting someone who is, we would love to hear from you. We see you and we love you.
Find more information about Licensed Psychotherapist, Dr. Zoe Shaw here.
Find Dr. Zoe’s book, Stronger in the Difficult Places: Heal Your Relationship with Yourself by Untangling Complex Shame here.
Find more information about Life Coach, Susanna Peace Lovell here.
Find Susanna’s book, Your True Self is Enough here.
Find our first book from We Are Brave Together here.
Find FULL episodes and clips of our podcast on Youtube here.
Brave Together is the podcast for We are Brave Together, a not-for-profit organization based in the USA. The heart of We Are Brave Together is to strengthen, encourage, inspire and validate all moms of children with disabilities and other needs in their unique journeys.
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Feel free to contact Jessica Patay via email: jpatay@wearebravetogether.org
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